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+{"text":"\nPENGUIN BOOKS  \nBURNING BRIGHT\n\nHelen Dunmore has published ten novels with Penguin: _Zennor in Darkness,_ which won the McKitterick Prize; _Burning Bright; A Spell of Winter,_ which won the Orange Prize; _Talking to the Dead; Your Blue-Eyed Boy; With Your Crooked Heart; The Siege,_ which was shortlisted for the 2001 Whitbread Novel of the Year Award and for the Orange Prize for Fiction 2002; _Mourning Ruby, House of Orphans_ and _Counting the Stars._ She is also a poet, children's novelist and short-story writer.\nHELEN DUNMORE\n\n# _Burning Bright_\n\nPENGUIN BOOKS\nThe author gratefully acknowledges an award made to her by the Authors' Foundation in 1992\n\nPENGUIN BOOKS\n\nPublished by the Penguin Group  \nPenguin Books Ltd, 80 Strand, London WC2R ORL, England  \nPenguin Group (USA) Inc., 375 Hudson Street, New York, New York 10014, USA  \nPenguin Group (Canada), 90 Eglinton Avenue East, Suite 700, Toronto, Ontario, Canada M4P 2Y3  \n(a division of Pearson Penguin Canada Inc.)  \nPenguin Ireland, 25 St Stephen's Green, Dublin 2, Ireland (a division of Penguin Books Ltd)  \nPenguin Group (Australia), 250 Camberwell Road, Camberwell, Victoria 3124, Australia  \n(a division of Pearson Australia Group Pty Ltd)  \nPenguin Books India Pvt Ltd, 11 Community Centre, Panchsheel Park, New Delhi \u2013 110 017, India  \nPenguin Group (NZ), 67 Apollo Drive, Rosedale, North Shore 0632, New Zealand  \n(a division of Pearson New Zealand Ltd)  \nPenguin Books (South Africa) (Pty) Ltd, 24 Sturdee Avenue, Rosebank, Johannesburg 2196, South Africa\n\nPenguin Books Ltd, Registered Offices: 80 Strand, London WC2R ORL, England\n\nwww.penguin.com\n\nFirst published by Viking 1994  \nFirst published in Penguin Books 1995  \nThis edition published 2008  \n1\n\nCopyright \u00a9 Helen Dunmore, 1994  \nAll rights reserved\n\nThe moral right of the author has been asserted\n\nExcept in the United States of America, this book is sold subject to the condition that it shall not, by way of trade or otherwise, be lent, re-sold, hired out, or otherwise circulated without the publisher's prior consent in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition including this condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser\n\nEISBN: 9780141917375\n\n## _One_\n\nLast night Sukey came back. Her poor head was bleeding. _You know how scalp wounds bleed,_ Enid told herself. The cut was only perhaps an inch long, but the blood welled and welled and would not clot. And Sukey looked at her and said, 'What a nuisance this is, darling. I can't seem to do anything about it,' while Enid wiped the blood off Sukey's forehead as it sprang sparkling on to her dress and arms. Sukey's arms were bare and brown. She turned them over, holding them out, exposing the white flesh with fine blue veins beating in it. Blood spray hazed against her dress, though she was upright, smiling. But in the back of Enid's dreaming mind there was a shadowy knowledge that all this blood could never have come from so small a wound. Even in her dream she knew what had really happened.\n\nMaybe if I'd seen her dead, thinks Enid for the thousandth time, turning over and brushing the light-switch. Sukey, cold and stiff as the inside of a trussed chicken. No more smell of her hair. No more secret door. Her hair all matted with blood and flies and bits of bone. You can't make murder pretty. Sukey's skull blue inside like chicken bones, and all in slivers.\n\nShe's here with me now, in this room. Sukey's eyes, her breath, her long bright fleece of hair spread like a tent around us both. She never went away at all.\n\nEverything returns, thinks Enid. There wasn't an inch of Sukey's body I hadn't touched. More than touched: loved. Perhaps Caro was right, that's where it gets you, wanting everything. Where did it get you, my darling? Who would ever have dreamed it would get you there, sprawled out on the floor of that small closed room, your head askew on the fender? There was blood drying slowly from the outer rim of the stain on the dull red Turkey carpet. It dried inward, darkening. The slow tick of blood became silent. There was so much blood. And the fly still kneaded the window with its legs, trying to get out, crisping against the glass. By the time men with big boots came tramping round the cottage, you weren't even Sukey any more. 'The body.' 'The victim.'\n\n'Darling,' murmurs Enid. She'd never have thought it would be so much worse not to have seen, and to go on and on imagining. She has imagined through fifty years.\n\n'I wasn't there,' says Enid. 'I didn't do anything. I never came.'\n\n'Enid, sweetheart,' says the Sukey in her head, 'you'll have to find me another handkerchief. This one's soaked through.' And she holds out her white handkerchief stained with her bright blood.\n\nDownstairs Jenny's baby howls. Jenny will be walking the floor again, to and fro, to and fro, missing out the board that creaks. There's something wrong with that child of hers. It can't be right for him to scream and scream like this, every night. But what a life for a ten-month baby, going from one squat to the next, one step in front of landlords and social services and bailiffs. The last place Jenny was in there wasn't any glass in the windows, and it was winter then. Jenny boarded them up, but then she had to keep the electric light on all day, and she was sure it wasn't good for the baby. She thinks this place is paradise by comparison, never mind the stairs and the fact there's no proper kitchen.\n\nThe buff official letter stands on Enid's mantelpiece so she won't forget it. She does forget things. Long-hidden memories rise, new rinsed. Decades of adult life are like a dull tide which is going out fast, leaving bare the landscape beneath. The letter tells her that the house has been sold again. Well, that's nothing new. Buying and selling, buying and selling; they don't seem to be able to think of anything else to do with this house. Certainly, nobody ever does any repairs. Well, Enid's protected. A sitting tenant. They've explained her rights to her at the Law Centre. It'll be the end for Jenny, though, and the baby, and the others who drift in and out, half living here, drying their laundry in the bathroom and cooking meals at midnight on a Calor-gas stove. Some of them are quite nicely spoken too. If the new landlords are the ones Enid watched over the banisters, then Jenny has no chance. A precious pair, thinks Enid, I wouldn't like to meet either of those on a dark night in a dark alley.\n\nOne was a big, powerful-looking man with curly hair. She'd listened but she hadn't caught his name. It sounded foreign. He'd called the other one Tony, the one with a face like a knife-blade.\n\nThey'll sell up the house and move on fast enough, once they see there's no money in it. And Enid's not going to take a cheque for a thousand pounds and move out to please them. She knows her rights, and she knows that rents are sky-high outside. Here, her rent's fixed.\n\n'We shall not, we shall not be moved...;' quavers Enid, beating time with her heels on the rumpled cotton sheet. The baby in the room beneath is silent, then there's a gasp and another roar of outraged breath. How the noise carries. The baby might as well be in Enid's bedroom.\n\n'Terrible jerry-builders, those Georgians,' says Enid aloud. She knows the history of the house. The fine fa\u00e7ade hides some Georgian jiggery-pokery all right. Rubble inside the wall cavities, and there's a long crack down the side of the stairs. Oh, the house is beautiful, if you don't know what's behind that honey-coloured stone which splits in the frost. The days of one hundred per cent conservation grants are long gone. They'll get a lot more than they bargained for, those two, buying this house.\n\nEnid shuts her eyes, feeling for the delicious warm entry into half-sleep. The baby's crying recedes, and instead she hears the far-off noise of a ship's hooter in the docks. 'All gone...; all gone...;' says the hooter. Enid breathes the warm smell of herself under the blankets. Wool prickles her chin. She's wearing her jumper still, so she must have forgotten to undress. Did she go to the pub last night? She can't remember.\n\nShe sleeps, and there's Sukey, standing by the edge of a lake and shielding her face from the sun. She's about to dive. Her long beautiful body is flexed, her weight balanced on the balls of her feet. The rock she stands on is black and glistening. 'Basilisk,' whispers Enid in her dream. Sukey's bare white toes curl, gripping the rock so as to launch herself from it. Below her the dark water is tense. Sukey's waiting for something before she dives \u2013 what is it? She glances at the thick green bushes and calls, 'En-id! En-id!' but no one answers. 'She's waiting for me,' says Enid, and she struggles to answer but cannot speak. Suddenly she is not behind the bushes any more, but high up on the rocks opposite, much too far away for Sukey to hear her even if she was able to call out. She can hear Sukey, but Sukey can't hear her. She can see Sukey poised on the rock with the thick frame of the forest behind her. And then, out of the frame steps Caro. Her red hair sings against the green. Red for danger. Sukey hasn't seen her; she calls again, 'En-id! En-id!' on two notes, high and clear ones which echo around the forest. Enid's tongue is thick in her mouth and no sound comes out. Caro walks very lightly up behind Sukey, keeping directly behind her so that Sukey won't catch even a flicker of movement out of the corner of her eye. She creeps up on Sukey like a cat, light but stealthy. The dark water waits for Sukey. And behind her Caro is climbing the rock, ready to spring.\n\n'Sukey!' screams Enid, bursting her lungs, tearing her throat, but the sound is no more than a whimper. Sukey hears nothing. She drops her hands to her sides and bends her head forward as if she is laying it down on the block, and Enid screams again, rustily, and wakes.\n\nShe scrubs tears off her face and struggles out of her blankets. This time she presses the light-switch and looks at her clock. Quarter past four. The baby's not crying any more. Jenny will have an hour of peace before the dawn wail begins. A lot of time has passed. She must have been asleep.\n\n'No wonder you had a bad dream, going to bed in your clothes,' she scolds herself. She must be more careful. The distinction between night and day is an important one, especially with new landlords coming. From the look of those two they'd have her put away in a home before you could say knife. Enid is good at watching, and at finding out what people are like before they've even seen her. People don't realize how voices carry up a house. Enid's door is usually ajar, and no one guesses that she's just inside it, standing still, listening. You have to keep on the look-out. That's what Sukey didn't do, the dream said so as plain as plain. She didn't see Caro coming. Miss Danger.\n\n## _Two_\n\nA midnight-blue BMW sits in the clot of traffic moving up the East End's Commercial Road. It's not a ministerial car, and there are no police outriders to clear its path. Paul Parrett doesn't want them today. He's with the rest through the filthy air of the Blackwall Tunnel, through Tower Hamlets and Lime-house. The long file of cars is the only wealth in these streets. Banks have closed, shops are boarded and drifts of uncollected post bulge back through letter-boxes. Metal shutters the colour of mercury fillings cover _Pizza Perfect._ A row of derelict factories shows jagged teeth of broken glass braced by razor wire. Two Bengali road-menders stand laughing inside their tent of red and white road tape, then crouch over their drills. Paul Parrett's car passes the drills very slowly. Their squeal bites against the thick metal of the BMW, and he sees that the men aren't wearing ear-muffs. Young men, they never think ahead. He knows this part of London well, with its sweat-shops, its missions, its disastrous housing where walkways cook in diesel fumes and tiny balconies drip washing. His round, toffee-brown eyes glisten with attention while his hands deal automatically with gears and steering-wheel. The day is muggy. The sun's already high but invisible in a pale haze of pollution. He winds down his window and rests his elbow on its frame. Just then a woman on the pedestrian refuge screeches after her child, who swings out off the rail, looking for a second as if he'll somersault as a Transit van swerves close enough to shave his forehead. She's wielding a double buggy and she can't catch hold of him. Suddenly the child's eyes dilate with fear as he sees the van and his game is stripped from him. He shrinks back against the dented steel railings which hold off cars from the refuge. Paul Parrett looks straight into the mother's face, scored with fear, tiredness, the weight of the buggy, the breaking wave of traffic noise against her body. The little boy stares back at the big car with TV eyes. The babies' mouths are level with the exhaust.\n\nNo one in the world knows that he's here, in a traffic jam on the Commercial Road, bonnet to bonnet with the sweaty drivers of Hondas and Toyotas and Audis. He could be anyone. He could do anything. He flexes his hands on the steering-wheel and looks in the mirror. He sees the bored face of a commuter, talking to himself or to his car telephone. A traffic jam is a good place to be alone. Who's Paul Parrett to that gaunt young man in a green parka who feels a winter wind blowing even in July? That woman on the refuge won't have seen the latest cartoon in the _Guardian._ He's hard to caricature anyway. The thing about Paul Parrett is energy, so much of it that you have to wonder what would happen if he ever used it all. His dark perfect clothes are neutral. No eyebrows or catchphrases.\n\nSt Anne's on the left. Soon he'll be nosing into the City. Everything's packed so tightly together in London. Between one street and the next you move from world to world. If the traffic wasn't so bad he'd glide from metal-sheeted shops and desolate housing projects to the canyons of the City in three minutes. It's beginning now. Money starts to whisper through the car windows. There's the first secretary in immaculate taupe suit, stepping out of a smoked-glass lobby and hurrying up the pavement to the next entrance. A dispatch rider jerks his Yamaha off the pavement.\n\nPaul Parrett loves the game of anonymity, just as long as he can stop it any time he wants. There's a telephone on the left of his dashboard, and he keeps the codes in his head. He's about six minutes late. They'll be waiting for him. He presses a button.\n\n'Five-seven.' He's through. 'John. I'll be another quarter of an hour or so.'\n\nA small fluster. John knows the car hasn't been sent for him, doesn't know what's going on, has been fast-footworked by his minister again.\n\n'Relax. Just have the messages ready.'\n\nInstantly John is calm, ready for business. He'll be annoyed with himself because he has betrayed surprise. His role is to be ready for anything Paul Parrett chooses to do. John gives a pr\u00e9cis of the papers which have arrived for the morning's meeting. He is lucid and to the point. The best briefer in the business: the sort who can make any minister feel it's all due to his own grasp of key facts.\n\n'Well done. That's excellent,' says Paul Parrett warmly. He's always known about stroking people.\n\nHe presses another button, cuts the connection and leans back against the seat. The air's just a little too warm, but not unpleasantly so. Nearly there now. London's all around him, like an animal in its lair, still potent in spite of everything. It smells of money the way a fox smells of fox. He smells it through the open window. He loves it. Those cliffs of glass are charged and humming. There's not a door he passes that he can't go in. It is his own choice to shunt past them in a traffic jam which is loosening up now, breaking into its component cars which stream off right and left as the drivers accelerate, thinking of the next meeting, of money, crisis, gain and loss. They may not think of the Commercial Road but it's there somewhere, lodged in their minds like grit which they pearl into profit. They are allowed to see but not to suffer, shielded in their central-locking cars, guided by traffic signals, linked by emergency contact to AA, RAC, police. But the sight of what's on offer along the Commercial Road frightens them deep down, way below the stories they tell themselves. They race up their office steps boyishly, where a boy would take the lift. They pour a cup of freshly brewed coffee, lift a telephone, set the screens humming and pick up the rest of the world.\n\nPaul Parrett sits inside his expensive suit, and feels the remembered itch of cold winds through clumsy clothing. He remembers standing for hours at bus-stops for buses which never came, listening out for cars so he could cross the roads in London smog. He remembers chilblains and chapped knees, dressing in unheated bedrooms, icy lino, underwear washed once a week, the black bits cut out of potatoes. He remembers meagre fires and margarine. He doesn't need a guide to the Commercial Road. He's made his own maps to get out of it, and now he's here in his car, after a bowl of coffee and French bread and on his way back from a place he'll never visit again. A complete waste of time.\n\nHe is a GI baby: one of the ones whose mother never got the chance to go to America. He is a bit of the war. By the time she found out about Paul, his father had already been shipped across to France. And that was that. His father might have died in France, or returned to the States. He might be alive still; he could very well be alive still. His mother is alive, he knows. He has checked it. One of the advantages of a ministerial position is that all sorts of small barriers fall away. The social security system is usefully comprehensive, and old people live a long time these days. She is in receipt of a supplementary pension, and she lives alone in rented accommodation. He has never seen her.\n\nPerhaps his adoption could only have happened just then, immediately after the war when there were so many children to be had. Bombed-out children, evacuated children, refugee children. A river of children whose parents had lost touch with them or with life. All these displaced kids to be slotted back into some sort of home. This is what Paul Parrett hopes. He hopes that a woman like Mrs Parrett wouldn't find it quite so easy to get hold of a child now. In 1946 she got her hands on a six-month baby with no trouble.\n\nHis adoptive mother never disclosed to the adoption society that the reason she had not been able to have a child herself was that she had never slept with her husband in fifteen years of marriage. Mr Parrett said nothing and died two years after Paul was adopted. Her dislike of sex extended to those who practised it and to those who were obviously the result of it. Paul was clearly in the second category, as the product of sex which must have been undertaken for pleasure rather than endured for the satisfaction of a wedding ring. Such an attitude was inconceivable to Mrs Parrett. She foretold bad blood. When Paul was a baby she would watch him, as if to see through his transparency the sexual act which had engendered him, going on and on, endlessly repeating itself, endlessly unforgivable.\n\nShe was a big, firm, righteous woman who stood alone outside the infant school gates, not speaking to the other mothers, the ones who had toddlers clawing at their skirts and huge moon-faced babies who sucked on dummies and smelled of shit as their mothers smelled of milk and menstrual blood. Her mission was to protect Paul from himself. She believed in swooping into the boy's room at night and switching back the covers to ensure that he was not playing with himself. He never was, after the first couple of thrashings with Mrs Parrett's wooden egg-whisk. Even in childhood his sense of timing was excellent. She would find him lying on his back, as instructed, hands crossed over his chest, his lustrous eyes following Mrs Parrett as she tweaked the bedspread back into place. She could not hide her disappointment from him. He hated her and knew that he hated her, but she gave him pleasure too as he grew older. She made him laugh. And he learned quickly. Soon he would get the better of her. By the time he was eight he knew he was stronger than her and that she was making a fool of herself. He was half American, he told himself in the night. Mrs Parrett was a foreigner to him. He invented a language which she could not understand, and spoke it to himself under the covers. American. He laughed quietly in the darkness, knowing that she was stupid. Soon he would grow up and never see her again. She was not his real mother.\n\nBut Mrs Parrett never knew that she had had the last laugh. When Paul Parrett grew up he found that his penis, always so receptive to masturbation, his best and most eager friend, wilted completely at the touch of a naked female body. Nor did he want men. It took him quite some time to discover exactly what it was that he was after, but by his mid-twenties he had it all worked out. The problem was that his sexual needs were unfriendly. There was nothing in them for anyone else, except money. He made up his mind that he'd never find a woman willing to put up with them on a long-term or unpaid basis. Once that was decided he could get on with arranging things. It meant having money. That was all right, it was part of the plan anyway. It meant employing intermediaries, which he didn't like. There was bound to be a risk in it, especially while a young man from nowhere was moving from research for an MP to money-making and back to politics. But he was always good at judging risk. There was a tight web of calculation under the wild surface of his money-making. Sex could be made the same.\n\nLuckily he knows he's not cursed with the desire to take risks for their own sake, to court exposure and degradation in order to increase his sexual excitement. He knows men who are. He's seen some get away with it, and he's seen others caught. For some of them the frisson of idling the car engine round King's Cross is part of the game. They pretend it's a necessary evil, but he perceives their pleasure. He's seen enough of indiscreet telephone calls, the use of an official car for unofficial business, the semi-deliberate, dangerous mingling of two worlds. He isn't like that, and King's Cross is no place for a minister of the Crown. Paul Parrett believes that those who are caught want to be caught. They may not be aware of it, but deep in themselves a desire for punishment wells up to meet the punishing world.\n\nAnd he has never made the mistake of thinking that the editors of tabloid newspapers are stupider than he is. He requires a service, therefore he must deal with intermediaries. He makes sure that these intermediaries are professionals who want to stay in business, and also that they have no links with major organized crime. He wants people who can be frightened when necessary.\n\nHe has one of the newer, secure car telephones. He presses another sequence of numbers and listens to the ringing tone. It answers, and he presses another security button.\n\n'Tony,' he says 'It's Paul. How's business?'\n\n'Terrific. And yourself?'\n\n'That last consignment was way below your usual standard. I'm really not happy with the way things are going. I don't want to have to find another supplier, but \u2013'\n\n'No need for that. You say there's a problem, we sort it out. No worries. Give me a window while we get you fixed up. Two weeks?'\n\n'Excellent. I'll be in touch.'\n\nPaul Parrett changes down and shoots into a side-street. Not many drivers know this rat-run. He picks over the conversation in his mind. Something niggles. Yes. He enjoyed playing the game just a little too much that time. He plucks up and identifies his own small flicker of gratification. Stupid. Once you start liking codes and secrecy for their own sake, it's time to think things over carefully. Never kid yourself you're getting away with anything. Never kid yourself you've got things taped. Or, like many before you, you'll find that they've got you taped.\n\nIt's getting too cosy. Tony and Kai are reliable and they're building up a reputation for dealing with specialist clients, but if they don't get it right with the next girl it'll be time for a change.\n\nThat's settled. He drops the thought, cuts neatly across a stream of traffic, turns west and lets details of a tricky briefing rise to the surface of his mind.\n\n## _Three_\n\nThe house waits. Jenny and her baby are gone, as well as the other squatters. Enid saw the men who came to get them out. They weren't the men who've bought the house. Those two are keeping out of the way until all the dirty work's done. That Tony and Kai. She knows both their names now. They don't take any notice of her, they know they can't get her out. And they don't look like the sort who'd want trouble, not with respectable tenants. With squatters, of course, you can do what you like. Enid'd be straight to the Law Centre if they tried anything on with her. The men who came to get the squatters out were heavies, hired men, not owners. Enid watched and listened and then at last it was all silent again. Now Enid is waiting too. She's waiting to know why they have bought the house.\n\nIt starts to rain. Thick warm drops drum on the van's roof. Water runs down the windscreen, dislodging the bud-silt which clogs the wipers. Kai turns the ignition and starts the windscreen wipers. The left one doesn't work: Maddeningly, it skims the windscreen without cleaning it.\n\n'Do turn them off,' says Nadine.\n\n'I need to see out.'\n\n'Why? There's nothing to see. It's much nicer in here.'\n\nHe looks round the inside of the van, at the cracked leather seats, threadbare mats and rust-blotched chrome. Nadine's sweet-papers lie on the floor. She's eaten a quarter of a pound of sherbet lemons. The ashtray is full, and it doesn't close. The rain beats harder, a squally wind rises, and the chestnut tree under which they've parked the van thrashes its branches until immature conkers drop and bounce off the windscreen like small green mines. In front of them a big empty field stretches. Neither of them would be able to identify the crop which is growing in it. They are city people.\n\n'We can't stay long,' says Kai. 'With this rain we'll get stuck in the mud going back up the track.'\n\nNadine listens to the rain on the roof. The sound makes her feel safe. She doesn't know where they are and she doesn't care. She's here with Kai and they don't need to go back yet.\n\nKai watches the raindrops running sideways, joining, puddling. He reaches across the gearstick and puts his hand on Nadine's thigh. She is wearing her school uniform; a plain white shirt and a short dark blue skirt. Her shirt collar is limp, her skirt is not new. He traces the shape of her knee, round and bony, then he slips his hand under it into the soft angle between thigh and calf, and strokes her skin.\n\n'We can't,' says Nadine. 'I've got my period.'\n\nKai continues to stroke. 'Never mind,' he says, as if consoling her. 'Never mind. It doesn't matter.'\n\n'It does to me,' she says. The van is small enough, their acrobatics tricky enough as it is.\n\n'OK,' he says, and pats her thigh, then bends down, collecting the sweet papers, stuffing them into the overfull ashtray. Kai hates dirt, and mess. Nadine tenses slightly. Kai takes up so much more space than she does. It's warm and airless in the van. She turns and unwinds the window. Fresh wet air blows into the car, drops spatter her bare arm. He wipes the rain off her skin with a finger, then licks it.\n\n'All right,' he says. 'Never mind. We'll go back.'\n\nAs soon as he says it she wants to stay. Why can't they just sit here and talk? But Kai never wants to do that. Sometimes his practicality melts her: the way he put a towel under them, that first night in his flat, and told her to drink a glass of water before she went to sleep in case she got cystitis. Sometimes it chills her. _Nothing's happening, we might as well go back._ It is really quite cold now, and she hasn't got a jersey. Kai starts the car and puts it into reverse. The wheels skid and whine, then grip as he reverses much too fast back up the track. They've left the gate open, so the van bumps back easily on to the road. The wind and rain have torn off bright green leaves and scattered them on the road. They are soft and tender and they tear easily, then they crush into slime.\n\n'Aren't you going to shut the gate?' asks Nadine. The gate had been fastened and tied with twine. Kai shrugs, puts the van into gear and accelerates down the road. He has no intention of learning the language of the English countryside.\n\n'Don't worry,' he says. 'We'll get you back to school by two o'clock.'\n\n'Second lesson,' says Nadine. 'I'll have to say I've been in the library.'\n\nKai concentrates on the road, his eyes narrowed to peer through the badly wiped, streaming windows. Their tyres slosh through surface water, kicking up mud and spray. Nadine crosses her arms and rubs her cold elbows as she watches his hands on the steering-wheel, casual and assured. He's been driving for eighteen years. Two years longer than she's been alive.\n\n'Where are you going, back to the flat?'\n\n'No, I'm going down to stay with Tony. Some business's come up.'\n\n'When're you back?'\n\n'I don't know,' he says, as if it doesn't matter. 'Wednesday. Or Thursday if I have to go on to London.'\n\nWednesday. That's five days away. One hundred and twenty hours. Or if it's Thursday, one hundred and forty-four hours.\n\n'It's getting stupid, all this travelling,' he says, yawning. 'It'll be good when the house is sorted out. I must talk to Tony, get him moving. It's all too fucking slow.'\n\nShe stiffens. His voice is as easy and casual as his hand on the wheel. 'You mean you might be going soon?' she asks.\n\nAt the sound of her voice he turns and looks at her briefly. Small extinguished pale face, dark hair blown about by the window draught. All her small round softness hidden under the clumsy shirt and skirt. No one else knows it's there yet: only him. He looks back at the road, takes his left hand off the steering-wheel and runs it round the shallow curve of her face, from temple to jaw-bone to chin. Then he rests his warm hand against the side of her face. She rubs her lips into his palm, shuts her eyes, kisses his skin and tastes metal. The taste of money: small change.\n\n'You'll come down,' he says. 'Once you've passed your exams.'\n\nWhat does he mean? A visit \u2013 or to stay? She won't ask.\n\n'It's too long,' she says. 'I've got another year after this one.'\n\n'You're sixteen,' he says. 'Old enough to leave home.' He turns and looks at her, smiles suddenly, too close, his eyes slitting. A real smile, a smile from the eyes. Distracted, he's let the van drift to the crown of the road. Luckily the distraction has also made him slow down, so there is just time for him to wrench the van back to the left as a grey Volvo packed with children rocks round the corner in a cloud of spray. The Volvo horn blares. Nadine turns and through the rear van window she sees three children staring back, their round cosseted faces agape. The school run, neatly livened by near-death. Kai says nothing. Nadine looks at her watch.\n\n'The bell will have gone,' she says.\n\n'Say the rain made you late.'\n\n'Not very convincing if I'm supposed to be in the library.'\n\nHe laughs. It's easy for him, thinks Nadine, all he has to do is drive away in his van.\n\n'I've always thought libraries were sexy,' says Kai.\n\n'Maybe they are where you come from. Not here.'\n\nKai is Finnish. He's always telling her how unusual it is for a Finn to speak English as well as he does; a Finnish Finn, that is, not a Swedish Finn.\n\nBut he's been here ten years, and he's in business. In business you've got to learn fast or you might as well get out. His language is loose, colloquial, easy. Only rarely is it skewed by something else: interference coming through from a foreign language she doesn't speak. Kai knows about communication. When Nadine goes to his flat the answerphone is always loaded, winking with messages. Tony phones most nights, and the two men talk for a long time. Kai takes calls in the other room. It's all business. It would only bore Nadine.\n\n'You'd better not drop me near the gates.'\n\n'You'll get so wet, darling.'\n\nShe shivers. _Darling._ He doesn't say it too often, so each time it's fresh and delicious. It's not easy for her to trust the word. She's heard it too often at home, passing between her parents as part of a complicated exhaustion of emotions. But from Kai it goes straight to her stomach every time, with the weight of Kai behind it, his age, his rough hair with a bit of grey at the front, his warm, heavy, muscular body, his sexual confidence, his directness. It goes straight to her heart. She keeps it there and never tells anyone. And perhaps it helps that 'darling' is a word in a foreign language to Kai. He reaches out and flips the stereo button. In this decrepit van the only thing of quality is the stereo. He slots in a new tape and a second later the van is flooded with a mournful tango. The voice quality is radiant.\n\n'What's he saying?'\n\n'Oh,' he shrugs, reluctant, wanting only to listen. 'The usual stuff.'\n\n'What usual stuff?'\n\n'It's about a dream place he wants to go to, deep in the forest. He'll build a house for the girl he loves, and if she doesn't come to him then he'll kill himself. Typical Finnish song ending.'\n\n'I like his voice.'\n\n'Yes, he's very famous. He has to sing this song wherever he goes \u2013 they always ask for it. He hates it.'\n\n'How do you know?'\n\n'I used to know him.'\n\nKai makes her feel as if she has no past. Only being a child.\n\n'Does she go?' she asks.\n\n'Who?'\n\n'The girl. The girl he loves.'\n\n'No, of course not. That's the point of the song.'\n\n'So he kills himself.'\n\n'Not straight away. Not while he's singing.'\n\n'All your songs are about the same thing,' grumbles Nadine, but the flood of the song has gripped her too. She yields to the luxury of sadness, nostalgia for places she has never seen, dark whispering forests and falling rain. Kai rewinds the tape so they can hear it properly. His hand is back on her leg.\n\nThey are coming to the outskirts of the city now. In his old van Kai gets through it faster than anyone else. He knows all the rat-runs. In the back-streets, in early afternoon, the first prostitutes are out on the corners. They look tired. Young white-faced girls in jaunty little lycra skirts, bandeau tops and frail sandals, they stare through the van as if it's not there. Kai and Nadine are of no interest. These are short-cuts for businessmen traversing parts of the city where you keep your windows wound up and lock your doors at traffic lights. Unless you are after something. If you are, it doesn't take long to get it. Since she was eleven Nadine has walked home from school and seen what happens. Slowly it's swum into focus and become something she understands. First the slowing car, then the sauntering girl glancing quickly up and down the street before she leans in at the car window and assesses its driver in the same second as she asks him the ritual questions and puts her hand on the doorhandle. Kai doesn't give the girls a glance. He buckets the van down a one-way which brings them out near the school, runs it along the road a short distance, stops. It's not quite at the gates, but she knows it can be seen from the windows, and the staff-room's on this side of the building. She opens the door and clambers out, then with deliberate bravado she leans back in again, bends over so her short skirt rides up her thighs, and kisses Kai.\n\n'See you soon,' she says. 'Darling.'\n\n## _Four_\n\nThe phone rings, and Paul Parrett takes the call without looking up from the papers on his desk.\n\n'Tony.'\n\n'Yeah. Just getting back to you about your query. You know, yesterday.'\n\n'Yes.'\n\n'Thing is, can you wait? I mean, I can fill you in for the meantime but there's something really special coming up which might be just right for you.'\n\n'How long would that be?'\n\n'Well, could be six weeks, two months.'\n\n'That's ridiculous.'\n\n'Yeah, I know what you mean, but this is once in a lifetime stuff. Is this line OK?'\n\n'Yes.'\n\n'Right,' says Tony in a burst of candour. 'Sixteen. Really classy. And looking for her daddy all right. This could be it.'\n\n'Sixteen,' says Paul Parrett. A faint, responsive sweat tingles in his armpits. 'Really sixteen?'\n\n'Yeah, guaranteed. No kidding. I wouldn't mess you about. I mean, it's wasting my time as much as yours, isn't it?'\n\n'Six weeks.'\n\n'Could be as much as two months, I got to be honest with you. But it'll be worth it. We could be talking long-term here. And, like I said, Vick'll fill in for the time being \u2013'\n\n'No. No. We'll leave it like that. You let me know when.'\n\n'Soon as I can. The only thing is \u2013'\n\n'What?'\n\n'If Kai gets in contact with you \u2013'\n\n'Kai's not in on it?'\n\n'Yeah, 'course he is, he's my partner. But not till it's all ready to roll, just in case there's a problem.'\n\n'No funny stuff.'\n\n'No, this is straight.'\n\n'Isn't it always?'\n\nThe safe line goes quiet. If it's safe, of course. Paul Parrett takes off his jacket, walks to the window. Night-time London blossoms beneath him. The smoky, reinforced windows don't open, but he leans his cheek against the glass for coolness. The glass is rainy. Amplified bubbles of it roll down towards his eyeball. He can smell his own sweat.\n\nThe service station hums and glows as if it's been dropped from Mars. Nadine stumbles as she gets out of the car, shivering. Cold night air wraps round her legs. Kai clicks the central locking. He's got rid of the van and she misses it, in spite of the rust, and the springs sticking into her buttocks. It felt like home. The hired BMW doesn't smell of anything except air-freshener. She'd thought it was Kai's at first, when he picked her up at the end of the street with her suitcases. Ten o'clock, they'd agreed, and his car radio was giving the news as she climbed in. But they hadn't left the city straight away. He'd had to call in at two or three addresses, to leave messages, to see people. It was all business and she'd stayed in the car listening to the radio. She wasn't looking where they were going and suddenly there was her school, a dark ghost of itself, with one security light burning over the main entrance. Nobody home. She looked back: she'd never see it again. Have a nice life, Nadine Light, eight GCSEs taken a year early, one of our highflyers. Nadine Light, half-way through her \u0391-level course when she suddenly stopped being able to read. But they didn't know that. Only the essays coming in late and the coursework not done and the lessons missed. Nadine Light standing in the staff-room, face sullen, averted. A disappointment. 'After all we've done for you,' said their eyes. _'Not university material,'_ said the headmistress's report. A BTec maybe? What that girl needs is six months behind a shop counter, then she'll appreciate all we've done for her. Five years on an assisted place and nothing to show for it.\n\nIt was past midnight by the time they got on the road, and the night was clear with a rind of moon. Kai accelerated on to the ring-road and the city shrivelled behind them. At the blue motorway turn-off they'd shot across the path of a lorry spangled with lights, carrying its freight of darkness, then they were on the slip-road. Kai put his foot down, the car leaped, then steadied, and the miles started to fold away behind them. She lay back in her seat. She was away, she was safe.\n\nBehind her, in the past, a tree was flowering in her parents' garden. It was the orange-blossom. There was one in the front garden, and one in the back. The scent taunted her, brushing her face, then retreating into dry dusty caverns of leaves. She had loved it so much. She had sat inside the bush, cross-legged, longing, teasing her lips with white flowers. No one knew where she was.\n\nShe had stood under the mock-orange, waiting for Kai. She pushed her bags into the shadow of the hedge in case anyone passed who recognized her. There was a bus-stop near by so it wouldn't look strange if she stood there, waiting. She looked up through the flowering branches. The street-lights smudged them but they were more delicate in dusk than they were in the sun. At the last moment she saw how beautiful they were.\n\nFour lads in a car went by, shouting and whistling at her out of the windows. A bus slowed for her, but speeded up when she didn't put up her hand. Five to ten. Five more minutes. Behind her, in the house, Lulu would be deep in dreams. They were hers and no one could touch them. Not even their mother could follow Lulu there, interpreting, moving her lips as Lulu moved hers. Lulu would moan and gargle or lie still in the shadows of the night-light which was always on, because Lulu hated the dark.\n\nTheir mother was making lists again. They were selling everything, going away. Away over the sea to the centre which could help Lulu. For months they had been studying brochures and calculating their finances. If they sold the house they could do it. Nadine would be fine. She'd transfer to the tech and get a room with a nice family near by. The centre was a village of pale wood, lost in vegetable gardens, orchards and pinewoods. Here Lulu would live. Here were the kitchens where her mother would work. And her father spoke German, he could work in the office. It was all arranged. There was everything Lulu needed. Conductive education: repatterning, intensive speech therapy, hydrotherapy, music therapy, art therapy. One to one, two to one, three to one. All for Lulu, grunting and rolling in her wheelchair, fighting free of the world which pinned her down.\n\nNadine blanked out Lulu's cries, the smell of tonight's sausages, her mother scrabbling under the sideboard to check for woodworm, her hair tied up with one of Daddy's socks. She stood still under the tree with her suitcase ready and thought of nothing. A glossy car peeled out of the stream of traffic and pulled in at the kerb. She frowned, looked away, tugged her bags closer so it was clear what she wasn't waiting for. Men coasted these roads all night. The car hooted and she flicked a glance at it. It was Kai.\n\nThere are oily puddles on the service station forecourt. It must have been raining here, though it was dry at home. She saunters over to look at a bucketful of carnations while Kai fills the petrol tank. The flowers are giftwrapped in foil and cellophane but some of their petals are brown. Not worth the money, she decides, though it would be nice to put flowers on the table when they arrive.\n\n'Do you want coffee?' calls Kai.\n\n'No, let's get on.'\n\nShe's glad when they are back on the motorway. If they could go on for ever, with the traffic thinning and the road wide and black in front of them like a strip of liquorice. When they're driving they seem to belong together. Kai opens the glove compartment and pulls out a bar of fruit and nut chocolate and a bag of toffees. He must have bought them in the service station. She feeds him chocolate piece by piece, and dissolves a square on her own tongue, rubbing the raisins clean of chocolate and then biting out their plump hearts. For once Kai doesn't put on a tape; he hums to himself a growly little tune on five notes. In the back are her bags with her clothes and a few books and her building society savings book into which her grandparents have been putting money each year since she was born. She has nearly two thousand pounds. Her dowry. It was to help her through college. It doesn't matter, since she'll be getting a job. The road is dry and the tyres hold firmly as Kai pulls out to overtake. On the digital display his speed flickers to the late nineties, then down.\n\n'Go to sleep,' says Kai.\n\n'I'm not tired. Put some music on.'\n\n'It's all crap. I forgot to bring any tapes.'\n\n'It doesn't matter. I wish we could go on and on, just driving through nothing.'\n\nHe looks round at her and smiles, then begins to whistle his song.\n\n'When I was a kid,' he says, 'that's just what I wanted. Sometimes I'd walk to the edge of our village and stare down the road going south. You don't know what they're like, our Finnish villages in the middle of nowhere. One day I'll take you there, then you'll see what I mean. There's nothing like it here in England. Little places scattered in the forest. Fishing in summer. Tiny farms miles apart. No tourists because it was too far from anywhere. People came into the village to the dance hall once a week to dance tango and drink in the car park. Get drunk, throw up, go home. All the respectable people inside going round and round and round. Maybe it's changed now: I don't know.'\n\nNadine smiles in the darkness. Kai is lit up for her by the soft glamour of midsummer nights she's never seen.\n\n'When I was fourteen I'd go and drink in the car park with my friends, because we didn't dare ask the girls to dance. Boys are boys.'\n\nThis is one of Kai's sayings. He has several and she knows them well. Life is difficult. Boys are boys. He uses them ironically but he uses them.\n\n'My grandmother had a story she used to tell me,' Kai went on. 'Where I grew up was close to the sea, on the north-west coast, you know?'\n\nShe nods. She's looked it up, of course, in the City Library atlas which shows the tiniest village, the most fragile serration of international boundaries. And there it was, north of Vaasa, north of Kokkola, way up the coast. Her face flushed in the reference library as she lighted on its name.\n\n'She told me about a woman who lived in the snowstorms. A kind of spirit, I suppose. My grandmother had a name for her, but I've forgotten it \u2013 I was only about six when she stopped telling me stories. All the old people believed in spirits, but they never talked about them except to the kids. My mother would have been angry if she'd known.\n\n'The snow-woman was the most beautiful woman in the world. If you were out alone on the ice you might hear her singing, and if you listened or called to her, she'd come. She had gifts she gave to human children. You'd go to her, thinking you were going to get one of those gifts, but as soon as she touched you, you belonged to her.\n\n'She'd rock you in her arms until you fell asleep. Next morning your parents would find you frozen on the ice. All us kids knew about it. We used to whisper the spirit stories. My grandmother told us that each winter as the sea froze near our village, the snow-woman came closer. On a windy night when snow was coming from the north my grandmother would put her finger to her lips and make us listen, and she'd whisper: \"Shh. Can you hear her? Can you hear her calling?\"\n\n'I always wanted to find the snow-woman and get her gifts. I knew I was cleverer than my grandmother. Maybe I was cleverer than the snow-woman, and stronger too, no matter what my grandmother said. I'd trick her. I'd snatch her gift and run off with it. I kept pestering my grandmother. \"What's the gift? Where does she keep it?\" I thought it must be toys or something to eat. But she wouldn't tell me. She sat drinking coffee and saying nobody knew. I wanted to knock her off her stool against the stove and keep her there till she told me.\n\n'But I couldn't. I wasn't strong enough. So I decided to find out for myself. I didn't tell anyone, not even the other kids. I put on my snowsuit and my skis, and buttoned my cap over my ears and skied away from my grandmother's house. By the sea the snow was rough. I took off my skis and walked. The ice was hard and crusty and it hurt my feet through my boots. It was all white in front of me, and there was a noise of wind, just like my grandmother had said. But there was no snow coming. I knew how to tell. I walked and walked.'\n\n'On the ice?'\n\n'Yes. I kept listening. I'd never been alone like that before. I knew if she was going to come, she'd come now, when I was all alone in the middle of the ice. When I looked ahead the air seemed to dance. You don't last long in that cold, if you get lost. My face was hurting. I cried a bit, but that hurt too because my snot froze on my cheeks. Then I got angry. The snow-woman was supposed to be looking for children. Why the fuck didn't she come? So I started yelling for her, the way I used to yell at my mother when she made me mad.'\n\n'Did she come?'\n\n'No. Nobody came. I kept on shouting. I didn't know how to go home. Luckily a man heard me, who'd been fishing on the ice. You know, they make holes. He was going back to shore because it was getting dark. He couldn't believe there was a kid out there, alone. Later my grandmother told me what I was shouting. \"Come here, you fucking snow-woman! Devils and Satans take you, you bitch!\" All the words I'd learned from my grandfather when he was alive. This man wasn't from our village, so I didn't know him. He carried me to shore and into our village, and asked whose I was. I kicked him with my boots all the way home. I was lucky he didn't leave me there on the ice.'\n\n'So you never got your gift.'\n\n'No chance. My grandmother cried and my mother pulled off my snowsuit and beat me with a wooden spoon. She was so ashamed of my bad language. _\"I don't know where he's picked it up,\"'_ he mimics savagely. 'And my mother shouted at my grandmother, later on, after everybody else had gone. She never told us spirit stories again. That was thirty years ago. Everyone was moving to the cities, away from the country. They were afraid people would think they were peasants. If it was now, people at Helsinki University would be chasing my grandmother with a tape-recorder, to get her stories for their archives. But she's dead. She couldn't live in the city. My mother wanted to take me south. My grandmother was nearly eighty: she was forty when my mother was born. Nobody wanted to hear her stories, except us kids. My mother hated all that old stuff.'\n\nA sign flashes by, too fast for Nadine to read it. 'How far is it now?' she asks.\n\n'Another hour on the motorway. Try to sleep.'\n\n'It's nice to talk.'\n\nBut Kai's silent. He's never talked to her about his childhood before. Surely that means they're getting closer? But it's so hard to know with Kai. There are so many things you can't say. Things like 'I missed you. I want to be with you.' But she's going to be with him now. She's got nothing to worry about. Of course he's busy \u2013 all those telephone calls and trips. That's the way business goes. It takes time to set up a deal. Kai's in property, mainly, and it's not a good time. He has other interests as well, and he and Tony are partners. It's not like her father's working world with its neat salary and deductions every month. It's much more exciting.\n\nShe's going to be with Kai, in Kai's house. The deal's gone through. Tony'll be there too, and she doesn't know Tony that well. He's a lot older than her, like Kai. But he seems all right, and besides he's a friend of Kai's. He's known Tony for years.\n\nThe car cruises on. She's never understood why people talked of cars cruising before, but the word matches this car. She slides down in the seat and curls herself sideways. Maybe she will sleep, just for a while. She is nearly asleep when she hears Kai laugh once, softly. He's remembering himself when he was little, she thinks drowsily, that boy in the middle of the ice, swearing and screaming, not knowing how near he was to death.\n\nShe jerks awake with light on her face. She shields her eyes and cowers back in the seat, blinking. The car is stopped. It's a policeman, big and square in the nearside window, an Alsatian on a short chain beside him, its front legs splayed and braced. The Alsatian looks at Nadine and rolls out its tongue. The policeman looks beyond Nadine, into the car.\n\n'Don't say anything,' Kai murmurs. He opens the car door and gets out, leaving the door open. There's a lot of noise, shouting, shrill continuous whistles, cars revving, horns, chanting \u2013 and can that be a mouth-organ? It sounds as if there are thousands of people out there. She peers behind. They're still on the motorway, just by a service station slip-road, but all the traffic is stopped and dark shapes are running between cars, vaulting bonnets and blowing their whistles. Kids. Younger than her even. They bob in and out of the lights, grinning. Torchlight spills and dazzles, crossing beams of blue police lights. Sirens from stopped police cars whoop quietly to themselves. She presses the window button and Kai's conversation with the policeman slices cleanly into the car.\n\n'Rave party...; clear it in half-an-hour. Road-block \u2013'\n\nThe Alsatian is right by Kai, its muzzle nearly touching his hand. Kai seems not to notice it. The heavy expensive flank of the hired car is at his side: lucky they aren't in the old van. The young from the stopped convoy of cars mill across the motorway, on to the hard shoulder, scrambling towards the service station slip-road. One tattered boy juggles four clubs as he runs. His head is back and he's laughing.\n\n'Won't do them any good breaking through there. The service station personnel have orders not to let them in. We try to stop them using the telephones, though the leaders carry portables...;'\n\n'It must be difficult,' agrees Kai.\n\nThe policeman drops his voice, confidential. 'We're not making arrests at present. Once we know the venue we can do something. They're waiting for the signal now. There's always a lot of hanging about. Funny sort of way of enjoying yourself, but they can afford it. No jobs to go to in the morning \u2013 they've all the time in the world, this lot.' His tone is observant but uncritical, as if he's talking about a herd of cattle which has got on to the road.\n\nKai laughs. 'What it is to be young,' he comments. The policeman smiles politely, but his automatically assessing gaze flicks to Nadine in the car, as if noting for the first time the twenty years between Kai and her young, pale, upturned face.\n\nHe's no fool, thinks Nadine. For God's sake, Kai, don't say any more...; get back in the car....\n\nSpidery bodies race back down the motorway embankment. There's a flash of light, an outburst of whistling, cries, the sound of reversing engines. The policeman stiffens. His dog smiles, showing teeth.\n\n'Right, sir. Best get in your vehicle and wait here,' he says and sets off at a steady half-run.\n\n'Look! Those cars are going through the gap. They're doing a U-turn \u2013 they must be heading back north.'\n\nTyres screech, two police cars rock towards the central barrier, find the gap and nose through. Hands reach down and bang the roofs as they pass. Then they're through and chasing off up the motorway. A nearby policeman talks urgently into his radio, then lopes off along the verge. More and more cars swerve into the gap and away. There are sirens hawing in the distance, reinforcements coming up from the south, their blue flashes miles off. Everywhere kids pile into cars and vans which are already moving away as the last body hurls itself through the door. There's a frenzy of car horns, flying crests of hair, shoehorned bodies. Faces gape at windows. The hunt turns, streams and flattens down for the race up the motorway.\n\n'They've gone,' says Nadine.\n\nBehind them lorry-drivers get back into their cabs and overnight salesmen put coats back on hooks in the backs of cars. Law abiding, the remaining traffic hovers, waiting for the off. Engines start and turn over, but no one goes forward until a police motorbike comes up alongside, going slowly along the line of stopped traffic as its rider speaks to the drivers.\n\n'Right, sir. The road's clear ahead.'\n\nThe knotted traffic stirs as vehicles edge into position. A few minutes later they are humming down the motorway again, each car or lorry a separate pencil of light. The incident's over.\n\n'Just as well we were in this car,' says Nadine.\n\n'Money's the one language every policeman in the world speaks,' says Kai.\n\n'You didn't try and give him money!'\n\n'No need. He only had to look at the car.'\n\n'He might have thought you'd stolen it.'\n\n'Do I look like a thief?' Kai turns to Nadine and smiles, then flashes his lights to make the car ahead pull over. The soft, supple, leather jacket. The shoes. The heavy hand-made cotton shirt. The old-fashioned gold watch. None of it too new, all of it living on Kai as if it had been born there. Money might not be Kai's native language, but he certainly speaks it well. Nadine lifts his left hand off the steering-wheel. She rubs her cheek against the jacket, breathes in. The smell of leather, the smell of money.\n\n'I love this jacket,' she says.\n\n'We'll get you one. You'll look good in leather.'\n\n## _Five_\n\nThe scrubbed floorboards are scabby and cool under Nadine's feet. Kai said the whole house smelled of cat's piss. It was all coming from this room. He scrubbed the boards with a bristling wooden-backed scrubbing brush, then he bought a yellow plastic mop and bucket and swilled the floor with boiling water and washing soda. The planks are swollen and the grain of the wood is raised. Later they'll sand down the wood, seal it, make it smell of clean pine and resinous varnish. She slides the soles of her feet gently backward and forward while her bare body cools until it feels dense as marble. Behind her the bed is a warm, sweat-damp heap of expensive linen and Liberty covers. It smells of sex and new goods, and it's too hot to lie there through hours of summer twilight when she can't sleep. Kai can always sleep. He's asleep now, behind her, on his back in the centre of the bed, one arm flung up and crooked behind his head, palm open.\n\nThere was a cat in this room when they first moved in. Nadine saw her streak across the landing, followed her, found the nest of torn newspaper and ginger kittens. She would have shut the door on them and gone away until the kittens were full grown. There were plenty of rooms. But Kai and Tony were close behind her, going through the house room by room, deciding what had to be done. They opened the door and there was the cat, back arched, legs stiff, covering her kittens, spitting and showing her teeth. She was a feral cat, Kai said, who must have got in somehow when the door was left open. She'd been looking for somewhere safe to give birth.\n\nKai got rid of her. He did not want animals in the house. The carpet stank of cat piss and cat shit, so he and Tony rolled it up and it went into the skip along with the sodden underfelt and the litter of newspaper. The kittens were half grown. Kai baited a box with mackerel and trapped the mother in it, then it was easy to drop the kittens in after her. They were straggle-limbed writhing creatures with needle-sharp teeth: even Nadine couldn't make herself want to touch them or tame them. A kitten twisted in the air as Kai half lifted and half threw it into the box. A narrow red thread of blood zipped down his arm. He stopped, holding his arm, looking at the small bright beads of welling blood.\n\n'Have we got any disinfectant?'\n\nThere was nothing but bleach. Kai poured salt into water and swabbed his arm.\n\n'Filthy creatures. God knows what they're carrying.'\n\nKai hates sickness. He does not like blood or dirt. When Nadine has her period she flushes the toilet twice so that he will not be disgusted by small floating cardboard tubes, tipped with red at one end. Yet he'll want sex during her period.\n\nNow, after five weeks, the room is habitable. Floor by floor, room by room, they are occupying the house. Until two nights ago Nadine and Kai slept downstairs in the drawing-room, with its marble fireplace covered in liverish paint and its floor-length windows. Their bed was a raft of new, expensive brass. They can do what they like in this house. The spaces are vacant, unmarked by furniture, waiting for the word.\n\n'Let's have this as our bedroom. What about this for you, Tony? It's nice with the plane tree outside the window.'\n\nThe four-storey house is as fluid as a child's brick playhouse. Anything might happen here.\n\nNadine stands up. She is naked but for the ghost-haze of last year's suntan bikini. She steps out quietly to the brocade chair, beached on pale boards, where Kai has slung his jeans and his heavy cotton sweater. The sweater cuffs brush the floor, nearly hiding Kai's gold watch. It looks careless, this arrangement of cloth and gold, but by now Nadine knows that Kai is never really careless. Blindfold, he could trace the ticking of that watch as easily as the beat of his own heart. It is valuable. It represents a past which he doesn't yet possess, just as this house does. Kai's slim heavy dark gold watch with its old-fashioned face and inscription on the back in minute flowing cursive: _To Captain Robert Denville on the occasion of his marriage, 28th September 1924._ The watch and its history have nothing to do with Kai, but it's not out of place on his wrist, the strap pushing flat the dark hairs that grow there. Nadine bends and touches the sweater, then stops. The jeans' legs are buckled where Kai has stepped out of them. They hold the shape of his body so strongly that he's bound to wake if she touches them. She glances round. He's still sleeping. For once he's vulnerable. It happens so rarely that she stops to enjoy the quiet-breathing room, the sleeping man, her own power. The only other time she feels like this is when Kai strips off his clothes at night, his back to her, and then turns and walks to the bed where she lies propped on her elbows, reading. She turns, looks up and sees his erection. It's part of him, but at the same time it's apart from him. It's like a present which can't be wrapped up or hidden. What if nobody wants it?\n\nOften Kai comes home even later than she does, and she's late enough after the evening shows at the Warehouse. He smells of night air, tobacco, drink. He's lit up and triumphant. Things are going well, he tells Nadine. Another deal's firming up. She is naked. He holds her tight against his jacket. The cool supple graininess of leather moves against her skin. It is like being enfolded by an animal. She rubs against the leather and her legs part.\n\nKai sleeps on safely. Her thin-boned brown hand slides into the fold of his jeans, searching for the pocket slit. Kai lies like a dead man, like a man buried in sleep. But he might open his eyes any minute. When he does he's awake at once, wary and alert. He doesn't wake up bleary like Nadine, burrowing back into the bed's heat. He snaps out of sleep between one second and the next. His features tighten. There's no tenderness in the mornings with Kai, no blurred moments of murmuring and dozing. He's up and off.\n\nI must have a cigarette, Nadine excuses herself, feeling deeper into the pocket. Kai doesn't like her smoking, but when she's run out of cigarettes late at night he'll always find a new packet in a drawer somewhere and give it to her, the cigarettes snug in their wrap, fresh and moist. If he sees her going through his pockets she'll say she was looking for cigarettes. She risks another glance round. Kai has turned away on to his side. Deeper and deeper into his pockets her hand goes, her narrow hand which he so admires. She draws out a packet.\n\nNew banknotes are just as fresh and moist as cigarettes. She eases them over the lip of the pocket. The money is dense but pliable, and surprisingly heavy. The band around the notes is unbroken and it's too tight for her to slip them out or fan the edges of the notes and count them without the risk of the band tearing. Then he'll know she's been in bis pockets. The notes smell of new books with a touch of metal. They have bent where Kai shoved them down into the bottom of his pocket. Nadine fingers the edges. Fifty-pound notes. Three thousand, perhaps? Probably more, carelessly stuffed into Kai's jeans. What's the difference between a naked woman holding three thousand pounds and one with empty hands? She smiles. It's not so much what you can do with the money; it's what can't be done to you once you've got it. Money's another kind of cover.\n\nKai always has money. If he's got a bank account she's never seen him use it, and he doesn't use credit cards. No electronic spider can trace Kai through a web of his signatures on credit card blanks: a tank of petrol bought here, a meal bought there, an overnight stay, air tickets. Easily traced. His transactions don't show up on any maps. It's Nadine with her casual wages who has a smart grey cheque-book and two cards in plastic folders and a monthly statement addressed to the house. Tony has money too, but she rarely sees him use it. Tony has 'arrangements', a system of exchanges which works without cash. For Tony the city is like one of those tourist maps where you press a button to light up _you are here._ The people and places where he does business are brilliant and the rest are blanks. Asda and Sainsbury can wink and glisten, Marks & Spencer can open a new wing, Tesco can crowd itself with special offers, but none of them affects Tony's economy.\n\nOnce Nadine went with Tony to buy wine from a warehouse down by the canal. Tony was acting big. Money was on its way, and you could hear it coming. Things had to be done in bulk, in style. There was a snap in the air like the first frost. Yes, the money was so close now that you could nearly smell it.\n\nAnd now she can. She sniffs the wad of notes. It is cool and reassuring in her hands, like good luck. That day Tony had got hold of a white Transit van and parked it by a peeling garage door at the back of the warehouse. Nadine got out and stood in the sun. There was honesty flowering in one corner of the yard. Buddleia burst its way through the beaten-up roof. Tony knocked at a side door and a man let them into a cave-like concrete warehouse. It smelled of earth and air which had been closed in all winter. There were no bottles, no labels, no descriptions. It was cold too. The man saw Nadine shiver and fetched a two-bar electric fire which mottled her legs as she waited. Lists were spread out on the desk. Tony leaned over them, ran a finger down, pointed. They talked in Italian and Nadine stopped trying to follow. At last the men shook hands, coffee was brought with grappa, and by the time Nadine and Tony went out into the sun Tony's boxes had already been loaded into the back of the van. No money, no signatures.\n\nNadine went to London with Kai. They took taxis everywhere and kept them waiting outside shops, clocking up time. It didn't matter. The whole weekend went by in a soft noise of money. They went to shops where girls of her age drifted and fingered and giggled, not dreaming of buying. Nadine and Kai were borne past on their wave of money. She was different now, not free to loiter and spray expensive perfumes on to her wrist until the smells blurred and cancelled one another out. She had to make choices. When Kai bought the brass bedstead he paid in cash, peeling off notes from his calfskin wallet. He stood there in his battered deck shoes on his raft of money. He knew what he wanted next: linen sheets, plain white.\n\n'Feel these, Nadine,' he told her. 'After all, you're going to be sleeping in them.' He only ever used her name now. Never _dear,_ never _darling._\n\n'Superb quality,' the shopman murmured sacramentally, tweaking a pillowcase. Superb, thought Nadine. One of those words nobody uses in real life. Around them people lifted and looked and felt, not buying. An invisible chapel of money surrounded Nadine and Kai and the shopman. Inside the chapel there was a holy echo of money and voices talking about money without ever saying the word aloud. Kai didn't ask the price of anything.\n\n'Will these do?' he asked Nadine.\n\nHer voice was small and cool as she answered, 'Yes. But we'll need three sets. We can't wash linen at home. These will have to be sent away to the laundry.'\n\nHe smiled at her approvingly. He liked her to display such knowledge, but she had so little of it. She had never touched linen sheets in her life, though she had read a book on household management \u2013 Mrs Beeton perhaps \u2013 one rainy caravan holiday in the Gower when there was nothing else to read. Rain on the roof, a bible of housekeeping on her lap (all those things she was never going to need to do), the taste of chocolate \u2013 Mars bars cut into slivers so they'd last \u2013 Lulu wasn't there. She must have been in respite care.\n\nThe house was a cash sale too, dirt cheap. How many inches of money had it cost? She wasn't there to see. No trips to estate agents with the two of them clearly a couple, no lists of particulars or young men in cheap suits ushering them through carefully tidied sitting-rooms. Buying this house was like buying a ship which had been wrecked at sea, towed into port and sold off at auction. The shipwreck had left the structure and some surprisingly intact detail \u2013 a cornice, some exquisite moulding, a frieze of nursery-rhyme characters in an upstairs room with barred windows, one porcelain cup hanging on a hook in the kitchen. But tides of dirt and neglect had beaten over the hull year after year and it was barnacled, stripped by crabs and nibbling shoals of little fish. The whole creaking structure of it, laced with parasites and dependants, was knocked down to Tony and Kai. It had all been under the water for years.\n\nThe banknotes are springy against the tips of Nadine's fingers as she shoves them back into the soft white cotton lining of Kai's jeans pocket. Jeans, sweater, gold watch, roll of money: Kai's equipment. In the mornings Kai dresses and is gone. Some nights it surprises her to find him home when she gets back late from a second showing. His departing back looks so final. There's no promise of return in it.\n\nDid he stir just then? Is he pretending to sleep, testing her to find out if she will take his money? No, he is still as a stone. She only asks questions of Kai when she knows he is asleep.\n\n'All that money,' she whispers. 'All that money, Kai! Where does it come from?'\n\nShe slides back into bed beside him, her bare cool skin prickling with anticipation, as it does whenever she touches him. After a minute she lifts her head to look at his face. Under his eyes the skin is pulpy. He has a weak chest and last winter he had bronchitis so badly it frightened her. She hadn't known him long then. She can hear his breath creak inside the narrow tubes of his chest when she lays her head against it. It sounds as if there's a bird's nest in there. He ought to lose weight, but she likes him as he is. His colour is bad tonight, as it was just after his bronchitis. That might be just the light filtering in through the dirty lace curtains and dirty magnificent windows. The windows haven't been cleaned for years, _ANGIE 4 DICK_ someone has written, and _baz wuz yer._ There's been no one living here properly for so long, unless you count Enid upstairs. Seven years, Kai says. Seven years of dust silting in curtains which are held up by tacks because the brass poles were the first things to go, seven years of blistering paint, newspapers rucked and yellowing under doors, mouse droppings in the kitchen, crisp spider-wrapped packages of flies. The house has had five owners in seven years. The property market has never come right. Prices don't go up as they used to any more. Each new owner waited a year or so for the sudden rise, like beautiful fireworks signalling the sell-off. But nothing happened. The market stalled or crept up or down by an inch. They cut their losses and sold without doing more than stir up the dust, sell scrap metal from the backyard, try to bully the sitting tenant out of her attic.\n\nKai can't bear dirty things to touch him. The new sheets, bluish-white like skimmed milk, are tangled into ropes where Nadine and Kai have tossed and sweated and kicked and twisted. A new duvet with a Liberty cover swells over the bedstead. They are buoyed up on brass and rust and rose and bronze. They have two pillows each and a bolster which he took from an apartment in Rouen. He might have bought it, paying off the concierge in French notes as immaculate as his English ones, or perhaps he just walked out of the building with the bolster under his arm like a corpse. No one would have stopped him, because Kai always looked as if he had a right to do what he was doing.\n\n'Feel how firm it is!' said Kai, thumping the ticking stripes. Nadine smelled shuttered French rooms.\n\nNadine has polished the bedstead until its brass knobs wink at her. The bed is a promise of what is going to happen, in this bare room with its streaky wallpaper, its damp patches on the plaster, its thick hook set in the ceiling as if for you to hang yourself there. The curtains don't fit. Lace roses make maps of lighter and darker grime. The curtains are slung up on a plastic washing-line which dips in the middle, showing a few inches of glass. Outside, the grubby sky is changing to violet. Where the sash cord has rotted, Nadine has wedged the window open, and warm petrol-laden air blows in.\n\nKai rolls, pinning her shoulder. He is heavy and when he is asleep he spreads out to claim the bed. She braces herself on her left elbow and shoves him away. Kai is always warm, and now the steady pulse of his body heat has settled for the night. He'll be fresh for tomorrow. Things to do, people to see. The soft July light will last for an hour or so yet. She sniffs for the thread of jasmine perfume which comes into the room at about this time, from the bush below their window. It seems as if the jasmine has been flowering for ever, just as the summer has been going on for ever. When it's dark you'd never know that its stems are lodged in builders' rubble, and its starry flowers are coated red with brick dust.\n\nKai's arm lies crooked and exposed. The underside of his arm is white, but heavily muscled, invulnerable. Nadine's little sister used to sleep like that, both arms braceleted around her head. The only time Lulu looked like other children was when she was relaxed by sleep, eyes shut, limbs sunk into the mattress. Nadine knew the names of all those muscles once. She did them at school. The hair in Kai's armpit is straight and silky. She's been staring at him too long. He's beginning to make no sense, like a name repeated too often. He is almost frightening.\n\nShe wants to bury her face against his arm, but it would wake him. She wants to lick his skin and breathe in the burned smell of him, like the skin of a child who's been playing in the sun all day. No. There's nothing at all childlike about Kai. He just smells burned, that's all.\n\nHer parents have left England. They took the van that had been adapted for Lulu's wheelchair, and clothes, and passports, and maybe they took with them some old photographs which show Nadine squinting against sunlight in the back garden. She phoned the empty house and there was a long, low, flat sound, the sound of nowhere. She phoned again and a bright female voice answered. The new people. The back garden must be ashy with all the things her parents have burned: Nadine's school exercise books, reports, certificates, a stack of winter clothes. Her parents have gone but she knows where they are. They know where she is too. One phone call.\n\n'I'm fine. Really fine. Staying with friends. And I've got a job. Yes, I'll write. Make sure you send the address in Germany, and love to Lulu.' Lots and lots of love to Lulu. They didn't come after her and she knew they wouldn't. She's had her turn.\n\n'We've got to think of Lulu now. This might be her chance.'\n\nShe imagines her mother's face, transparent and ugly with hope. This might be Lulu's chance. Sell anything, go anywhere. Nadine'll be fine. It's so respectable you could put it in a Christmas circular letter.\n\n'Nadine's fine. Not very academic after all, as it turned out. Those GCSEs were a bit of a false dawn. Still, she's got a job and a room in a house with friends. Oh, yes, we're in touch. She phoned us just the other week. Nadine's always been old for her age. Independent. You wouldn't believe she was only sixteen.'\n\nNo, thinks Nadine, they'd leave out the last sentence. Even an unbelievable sixteen is a bit much, a bit much to ask people to swallow. Well, she's not sixteen any more. She's nineteen at work and nineteen with Enid and anyone else she meets. Nineteen is fine.\n\n## _Six_\n\nAbove, the plumbing wheezes. Someone's running water into the bath. It's deep, claw-footed, and it takes ages to fill. Water gushes and then coughs in the pipes before it trickles into the geyser and out again in a thin boiling stream. It takes for ever. Nadine wants a bath or she'll smell all the next day, of sweat and semen and her own vaginal juices. She likes all these smells when they are fresh, but not when they are stale and masked by a quick squirt of deodorant before work.\n\n'Nadine! Nadine! Are you there, dear? Have you got a minute?' Nadine flips out of bed, runs to the door, calls up softly, 'I'm coming!'\n\nAt least Enid's not deaf. You don't have to bawl around the house to make her hear. So it's Enid in the bath, her wispy hair damp round her face. She always runs the water too hot. She can manage the geyser as nobody else can. With a flick of her wrist she keeps the balance between a rush of cold and a trickle so hot it makes the geyser blow back and shut itself off. But then Enid ought to know, because Enid's always been here.\n\nThe geyser is huge, dangerous and stained with verdigris. Enid likes the smell of hot water, she says to Nadine, 'Oh, hadn't you ever noticed it, dear? Put your face over a basin of hot water, then \u2013 it smells quite different from cold.' She's right, it does. She likes to simmer, slowly reddening her skinny calves and thighs. Getting in is a gradual immersion, staged with small pained lip-pursings and a hiss of indrawn breath.\n\n_'I...; KNOW that my redeemer liveth,'_ hoots Enid from above. Nadine pads up the uncarpeted stairs, past the dirty windows on the stairway where three pigeons sit plump on the ledge. Warm used-up air moves deliciously against her, while the insides of her thighs catch as she walks, sticky with Kai's semen, her body leaking with Kai, her nipples dark and swollen from his sucking. The big bare house echoes as she goes up through it. _'And that He-ee-ee-ee,'_ sings Enid, her voice thinning as it spreads through the sun-warmed cavern of the house. All day the tiles have been baking until they shimmer, and now they pump back stored heat into the upstairs rooms. You can scarcely breathe up in the attic, where Enid lives. Flies die of heat, and toast on the window ledges. Nadine pulls her baggy t-shirt on over her head.\n\nThe bathroom door is off its hinges and propped up against the door frame outside, leaving a gap through which Enid and Nadine can slide with ease, although Kai and Tony have to manhandle the heavy door aside each time they want to go in. Enid doesn't mind the lack of privacy. She likes company when she's in the bath. She calls out again, hearing Nadine, in a hesitant old-lady voice which she knows Nadine will not be able to resist. 'Are you there, dear? Just come in a minute, would you?'\n\nAs soon as Nadine is through the gap and into the bathroom, Enid's voice deepens and firms to its usual tone. 'Nadine, just look behind the toilet a minute. The soap's down there. The bugger slipped out of my hands when I was getting into the bath. And you know I'm not supposed to bend down.'\n\nEnid claims that the doctor has told her never to take a bath on her own. Since flu last winter, and pneumonia after it, she ought not to risk it. 'Dr Govind says it's affected my heart,' she tells Nadine now, as she tells her every bath-time, fixing her with small peremptory eyes in which there is also a trace of genuine fear. 'After all, what if I fainted? Who'd hear me in this mausoleum? I've got to think of that.'\n\nWe'd break down the door. And then Kai'd give you the kiss of life.'\n\nA small discriminating grimace from Enid. 'No, thank you, dear, it would scarcely be worth his while, would it? With an old woman like me.' And Enid pats the wicker dirty-linen basket beside the bath, leaving a wet hand mark on its satin seat, inviting Nadine to sit there. Nadine stoops behind the pedestal, locates the soap and rinses fluff off it before handing it to Enid and sitting down. Enid soaps the small pouched purses of her breasts. These breasts fascinate Nadine. They are empty. They have outlived their purpose, as if Enid has metamorphosed into some new and unexpected creature, reborn into sexless innocence. Is this what everything comes to? Enid has voyaged through decades of being a woman and come out on the other side. Now she doesn't bleed, she doesn't fill and empty each month. Her buttocks are hollow and she is breastless. It's not so long since Nadine was breastless too, and she remembers it clearly. A white ribby sheet of chest, and two nipple pimples. The freedom of swimming in a pair of cotton pants, to the indulgent smiles of adults. Then the first warning signs: small burny triangles lifting themselves from her chest, like the symptoms of a disease. And someone whispering that it was time that child stopped running round in her pants.\n\nEnid smiles and hands Nadine her special Castile soap. Frail ropy muscles move on Enid's arms. Nadine worries that Enid is frighteningly thin, but then she is the only old woman whom Nadine has seen naked. Perhaps under their layers of brown and fawn and washed-out blue all old women are like this. Enid's grey groin looks innocent as a child's. It's hard to believe that a baby has fattened inside Enid, has pushed his way out through those concave thighs, has blissfully petted Enid's breasts through a trance of milk. For Enid breastfed her child for a month before it was adopted. 'He was like a tiger for milk. I had a lovely figure, dear, and he didn't spoil it. Two weeks after the birth my stomach was as flat as a board. Not like these girls you see sagging along. There's no need for it.' Enid has told Nadine the whole story. She couldn't keep the baby, because in those days if you weren't married there weren't any of these benefits. You had to crawl to officials, and then all you got was a few shillings from the National Assistance, if you were lucky. No chance of a flat either. You'd get the door shut in your face. In those days they could do as they liked. But Nadine wonders. If Enid had wanted to keep the baby, a hundred officials wouldn't have budged her. Enid's tough.\n\nEnid never wears old-lady clothes. Fawn and beige and stone are anathema to her. From behind, in her black reefer jacket, beret and ski-pants with a strap under the foot, she looks like a skinny bold twelve-year-old who's pretending to be grown up. Her ankle socks are scarlet.\n\n'Is your Kai at home?' she asks.\n\n'Yes, but he's asleep.'\n\nEnid nods, satisfied, and puts out her hand for the soap again. Her sharp glance takes in Nadine's body, knows what it has been doing. That sort of thing doesn't bother her at all, she's made it quite plain. And besides, Nadine keeps Kai sweet. Enid is wary of him, and Nadine isn't sure if it's just because he's the landlord or not. If only Enid wouldn't leave the bathroom in such a state when Kai was around. And she ought to get properly dressed in the bathroom, not just wrap a little towel round herself which falls off as often as not as she clambers back upstairs to her attic. She doesn't know how puritanical Kai can be. An old woman should not have a body, let alone risk its being seen. Enid disgusts him. He'd be well pleased with an Enid subdued in fawn and stone.\n\nEnid never cleans the bath after using it, because Dr Govind told her not to stoop. Often she does not flush the lavatory after using it either. The cistern is erratic and Enid is afraid it may affect her blood pressure if she stretches up and hauls on the chain. Nadine flushes it after her when she's at home, releasing the roaring brown waterfall which it takes the cistern ten minutes to collect. Nadine wipes around the bath and rinses it too, before Kai or Tony can come upon Enid's soap scum, Enid's small curled grey hairs beached on the ring round the tub.\n\nEnid lies back, eyes closed, her weightless body bobbing. Her eye sockets are deep and sunken. They are filling up with darkness. But it's only the way the light falls that makes her face look like a skull, not a living face at all \u2013\n\n'Enid!' cries Nadine, suddenly panicking.\n\nEnid opens her eyes. 'What is it, dear? Is something the matter?'\n\n'You looked awful. Are you OK?'\n\n'You mean you thought I was dead. Oh, no, I'm not going to die in the bath, not with you here. Very upsetting all round. You needn't worry about that,' says Enid and stands up, so that water divides over her hip-bones and her small shrunken stomach, and puts out her hand for the towel Nadine gives her. Then the careful patting and drying and powdering, the gathering of the Castile soap into its special soap-box and Enid is ready, towel trailing, arms bundled with clothes and soap.\n\nShe squeezes her way around the door, leaving the bathful of water rocking gently and puddles of water and talcum on the floor.\n\n'There you are, dear. Now you can have your bath. Just give that geyser time. It blows back if you rush it. Come up and say goodnight later on if you like, I shan't be asleep, I'm going to do my jigsaw.'\n\n'How's it going?'\n\n'Terrible, you never saw so much sky in your life. It's like one of those day-trips to Lincolnshire to see the bulb fields. Still, I _have_ just put in the top of a chimney-pot, so things are looking up.'\n\nShe goes out, across the landing, up the winding carpetless stairs to her attic room. No one comes up here. Enid does not find it stifling. She likes the heat soaking through to her bones. She stoops and picks up leggings and t-shirt. She's never worn leggings before, but there was a pair in the Oxfam shop, so she decided to give it a try. Perfect for sleeping in, she finds. Warm and elastic, like a second skin. She pulls her WOMAD t-shirt over her head \u2013 Cancer Care \u2013 and looks at the sky spread out on the table. The jigsaw has one thousand pieces. Enid likes a challenge. Sky isn't all the same anyway. It deepens and darkens, and there are clouds. But jigsaw sky is an even mid-blue all over. You have to forget about colour and go for shape. The best thing is not to stare too long. Catch a bit out of the corner of your eye and it fits. You have to take a jigsaw by surprise. It's all instinct. The sky is on the table and the grass is on the floor. Enid leans down, stirs the pieces, pounces. There. That bit goes on the corner. The brown house bits are still jumbled together, not even spread out. It's a dull jigsaw, but they are much the most satisfactory. A house, grass, sky. No clues, but everything you need. She sniffs the Johnson's talcum powder smell settling round her.\n\nI wonder if you can still buy that powder Sukey bought. Rose Geranium. Sharper than roses. I used to dredge myself with it as if I was a sponge cake, till I saw the price in John Lewis one Saturday. Sukey didn't care. I saved for weeks and bought her some, but it was no more to her than if I was delivering the milk. 'Why, Enid, darling, that's sweet of you.' She always had things like that around her, so it meant nothing to her. A smell like that takes you back. You couldn't get Floris powders in the war; you couldn't get anything. It must have been years later I went past the perfume counter, not even thinking. Years later. And I was back there in her green bathroom, with the soap in cold glass shells and the water rocking. I never knew people had bookshelves in bathrooms, and fires, and plants so tall they were nearly trees. And the bath standing on its own feet, out in the middle of the room, so that when the fire was lit you could see the pattern of the flames on your wet skin. The flames would run up from the coals like flags. It was best coal, Welsh coal. It burned with a clear flame and no smoke. She had big Turkey towels, put away with lavender bags between the folds so you could smell it when you shook out the towels. And a low window with a window seat in it and the chestnut tree growing outside, making the light green. Sukey would sit naked in the window seat after her bath and I'd see the chestnut candles lit up behind her head. White candles. That spring we saw the hands of the chestnut leaves spread out against the window, touching it. It was the greenest thing in the world. Sukey had iris in the bathroom then, tall purple and brown iris. I sat in front of the fire reading out of a book with red covers, rough, not nice to feel. It used to catch on my nails. _\u039b Fairy Tale Treasury,_ it was called. Sukey had had it when she was a little girl.\n\nWe needed the fire. It was April and April's cold in Manchester. We didn't often see sun coming through the leaves. The sky was grey, grey behind green. Long grey afternoons with the fire burning. It was everything I'd ever wanted. 'No point going out in this, darling,' Sukey said, and she turned the hot tap on with her toes. The hiss of rain keeping us in, the fire burning up, me on the hearthrug reading _The Red Shoes._ Clara danced through the forest. _Dance, dance, she must keep on dancing._ The only way they could stop her was to chop off her feet. I've never forgotten Clara's red, bloody feet. I can see them as clearly now as I can see those green leaves. That was what you got. It was the price you had to pay. Not that I cared then, with the heat of the fire on my back.\n\nShe looks like a dancer. Nadine. I would never have thought she belonged with those two. When I saw her come I thought for a moment she was his daughter. She's young enough. Nineteen! She's no more than sixteen, if she's that. But then I saw the way he touched her. I saw her glance up at my stairs, as if she wanted to climb them and find out what was up here. I knew then she'd come and see me.\n\nThe first time was, she didn't know how to work the geyser. Could I show her, she asked.\n\n'There's only me at home,' she said. Oh, yes, she's quick. She'd guessed I wouldn't have come down, not if her Kai and that Tony were about. I don't ask people up here. Jenny never came up, it doesn't do. But there was something about the way Nadine looked up the stairs and said, 'It must be nice up there, away from everything.' It made me feel different. We'd run the bath and it was waiting, but I said, 'Come and have a look if you like.'\n\nShe didn't say much, didn't touch anything. I had bunches of peppermint hanging up to dry, and she did ask what they were, but not in that way people ask as if they're laughing at you inside themselves. I said I'd make her some mint tea if she liked, and so she sat down. She wasn't bothered about the bath cooling. So we sat and talked for a bit. Nothing much, but it was nice.\n\nShe knocks most days. 'Enid, I'm going out to get the milk. D'you want some?' 'Enid, I'm sure there's mice in the kitchen. Have you ever seen them?' I don't tell her I've seen worse than mice here, till Jenny got the cat. 'Course her Kai's got rid of that.\n\nNineteen! If she'd any sense she'd put on a bit of make-up and not cut her hair so short. But I suppose he must like it. Some men are funny that way.\n\nI like having her here.\n\n## _Seven_\n\nThe bathroom is clammy with steam. Nadine pushes up the window. She won't bother to have a hot bath, she'll just pour cold water over herself. This is the only sash window which still works. Freshening night air flows in, carrying the city's gabble. Police sirens flee downhill towards the docks. Each night Nadine lies awake long past midnight, listening, unable to sleep. She hears fights, cries, groans, high heels clipping past alone, much too late, much too fast, alone and frightened. When everything's gone quiet a baby always starts to howl through an open window. It doesn't matter how far away it is, the sound pierces her like a needle. Nothing seems to join up. She can't read what is going on here. And Kai sleeps and sleeps. It's as if she's the one with the bad conscience. She can't put her finger on what keeps her awake. There's just this faint threatening sense of tension, as if something bad is about to happen. If she keeps awake she'll be safe. It's been hot too long, that's the trouble, one flawless day following another. We need rain to wash away the dried dog shit on the pavements, the burger litter and the dust.\n\nIt's the end of July, and the weather's changing. The spell is beginning to break. Quick wings of cloud are moving from the west. The leaves are dark green and drying to crisp edges. Soon it's going to matter that there's no heating, and many of the tiles are missing. She hasn't got any warm clothes, only the summer stuff she came with. On the top landing there are dusty plastic buckets to catch the rain when it falls. Better not think of that now. She'll just fetch a clean top and her jeans and go down to the kitchen and make coffee. No, not coffee \u2013 it'll keep her awake even more. Something to eat. That tin of ravioli \u2013 has anyone eaten it? She won't put on the kitchen light, because it's nice in the kitchen in the half-dark. The electric lighting in this house hasn't been touched since the twenties, Kai says. In the kitchen there's a brass chain to pull down the big light-globe from the ceiling. Its brilliance scores your eyes and stains your retina so that even if you shut your eyes you see the same patterns pulsing red behind your lids. There aren't any sidelights or table-lamps in the house yet, because they would overload the circuit. Even as it is the fuses blow regularly. But it's summer and it doesn't matter.\n\nShe's got to have something to eat. Her stomach's growling. There's Enid's door shutting with a squeak and a click. She must be going to bed. Often she leaves her door ajar all evening, drawing voices and music up her attic stairs and into her room. Perhaps she's lonely and likes to listen out for the sounds of the house. Hers is the only door which closes properly, the only one which still has its brass doorknob. The rest have gone in the steady stripping of the house over years of shifting owners and disappearing tenants. Only Enid has been here all the time, the sitting tenant, riding out long silent nights in her room, lighting fires in her grate with coal which she buys in blue plastic sacks and wheels through the city streets on a buggy frame. She collars the postman to help her lug the sacks upstairs. 'I can't lift anything, dear. It's my heart.' Enid has kept her doorknob. Nadine wonders if Enid ever woke up to hear the mouse-like sounds of a screwdriver working away at the plate which secured it to the door. Did she wind herself up in her sheet and go out to tell the kneeling young thief that he might take every other doorknob in the house, but not hers?\n\n'I live here, you see, dear.'\n\nSo much of the house has disappeared. The lead flashing, the downstairs cloakroom fittings, brass curtain rails torn out of every room, leaving holes in the plaster; the wrought-iron balcony railings sawn through and sold. Georgian cast-iron is worth money. Now the balcony is just a narrow unguarded ledge from which you step off into space. It faces south and gets the sun most of the day, so in spite of the sheer drop to the pavement Nadine still sunbathes there with one foot drooping over the void. If she kicks she touches the overgrown branches of lime and plane trees tangled together in the air. Leaves brush against her toes. No one has pollarded the limes for years. The square is a communal garden and as derelict as the houses which share it.\n\nA whole marble fireplace has been hacked out of the back sitting-room, but whoever took it missed the matching one in the front of the house. They must have been in a hurry, and besides, the second fireplace is disfigured with dusky red paint, mould-spotted like salami. They might not have seen that there was marble underneath. What was Enid doing while thieves hauled a six-foot wide marble fireplace through the hall and down the front steps? Did she shut herself away in her attic room, or did she peer down over the banisters and encourage them: 'Up a little, dear! Careful now or you'll do yourselves an injury.'\n\nNow the house has passed to Kai and Tony in its time of weakness and nakedness. They walk round it, plumbing its flaws. They are the possessors. Even Enid in a way belongs to Kai and Tony. That is why Nadine is so quick to clean the signs of Enid from the bathroom before the men see them. They have power, and Enid has none.\n\nThe kitchen is at the back of the house, facing north against the steeply rising terraced hill and its criss-cross of fire-escapes, backyards and walls shaggy-topped with broken glass. The kitchen is cool and shadowy. The shadows hide dirt which is beyond any cleaning Nadine knows how to do. It needs industrial machinery to shift it, not human strength. The dirt is organic, rusted and sooty and earthy, oozing out of gaps between walls and skirting boards, growing upward between red tiles which haven't been scraped or waxed for years. There is black fungus around the sink. When you bend down a thin acrid smell sets your eyes stinging. One set of tenants kept ferrets in the basement, years ago, says Enid. Congealed grease coats the plates of the Aga, which has a damaged flue and can't be used. A man is coming to take it away. The gas cooker is more or less usable. Kai poured two bottles of cleaner over it and left the paste there to penetrate layers of burnt-on fat. He scraped the mixture off the next day, and, though the cooker surface is dull and scratched, it is now clean. But even Kai failed with the sink. A whole packet of washing-soda and a bucket of boiling water hadn't cleared its sweetish smell of decay. A sour blob of water and fat went round and round in the plughole.\n\n'What's the problem?' asked Tony. 'Is it blocked?'\n\n'I'll have to take the U-bend apart. There's some crap in there blocking it up. We'll have to get shot of it. Yes,' he repeated, relishing the idiom, 'we must get shot of it. And the rest of this so-called kitchen,' and he allowed his gaze to sweep scornfully over the three cream-painted 1930s cupboards which no longer had doors, over the scored Formica table and the enormous gas refrigerator which opened to reveal a minute cave of ice.\n\nNadine takes a tin of ravioli from the cupboard, opens it and glops its contents into a saucepan. Every sound rings hollow in this kitchen. It's too high for its area and has too little furniture in it. Nothing absorbs sound. Her bare toes curl up against the sticky cling of the tiles. Apart from the ravioli there's a loaf of rye bread, a piece of Parmesan which Tony got from Paolo's where he eats, and six bottles of wine. Otherwise the kitchen is bare of food. And yet she's earning a wage and she has her building society book. Kai has three thousand pounds in his jeans pocket. Why don't they have nice food? Why don't they sit down together?\n\nShe'll have a glass of wine. There's another bottle open somewhere, from last night. Yes, here it is, wedged in the snow which nearly fills the fridge, half a bottle of white Burgundy.\n\n'They could use our fridge for the Winter Olympics,' Tony had said. 'For making snow on the ski-slopes. It's unbelievable.'\n\nThere's the front door now. It won't be Enid, who never goes out after she's had her bath.\n\n'Tony?'\n\nHe comes in with carrier-bags slung on both hands. He puts them down on the table, wedged so that they won't keel over and spill their contents. Food, thinks Nadine, peering into the bags. But the top of the largest bag is full of knives. Tony takes them out. There are four. A carving knife, a cook's knife, a vegetable knife and a knife for which Nadine can't imagine a use. It's long and thin and flexible, made of the same dull steel as the others. Like them it has a matt-black handle. The knives are sealed in bubbles of plastic. Nadine picks up the slender knife and weighs it across her hand. It's beautifully made.\n\n'What's this one for?'\n\nTony removes it from her. 'It's a boning knife.'\n\n'Boning?'\n\n'For getting flesh off the bones. Like this.'\n\nWith his knifeless hand he sketches a gesture so graphic that Nadine flinches. She turns over the other knives, looking at the prices. '\u00a328.99! Tony! Or is that for all of them?'\n\n'You're looking at quality here. Real lifetime stuff. See that edge. You get what you pay for with this sort of thing.'\n\n'Shame we haven't got any food to cut up.'\n\nHe points to the other bags. 'Here, have a look.'\n\nNadine delves. Veal. Flour. Oil. Cheese and herbs in transparent wrappings. A net of tight-skinned peppers, red, orange, yellow, purple. A fat scented cantaloup melon. A thick bar of expensive plain chocolate, and a dozen eggs which are slightly too big for their cardboard box. White briny cheese, and a jar of plum tomatoes. Plump olives, a mophead of endive. And more. She spreads out the stuff on the table and breaks off a piece of chocolate.\n\n'I've had enough of eating out. It's always the same,' says Tony.\n\n'I thought you liked it. You're always saying \u2013'\n\n'Yeah, well, it gets boring. Anyway, I'm a good cook.'\n\nTony always eats out, usually at the same restaurant: at least, he has done so in the brief _always_ which is all she knows of him. The restaurant he goes to is Paolo's, which is what everyone calls it, although it has _La Dolce Vita_ scrolled on the awning. They cook family food, low-key and strongly flavoured, and the wine is sent over from a family vineyard. Paolo still has land at home, and cousins work it for him. At weekends the restaurant is packed out with Italian families celebrating weddings, baptisms, first communions, confirmations. Tony has an arrangement there too. He eats late. Sometimes Nadine sees him walking up the road to Paolo's when she's already on her way back from the pub with Enid. He goes alone, but often he eats at the family table, and the daughter, Clara, stops work for a few minutes to talk to him. That's the pattern Nadine knows. But, after all, she hasn't known Tony that long. Perhaps something's gone wrong. Paolo likes Tony, you can tell. He's always calling Clara out of the kitchen to have coffee with Tony after the meal. Maybe that's the trouble. You can't mess about with Paolo's daughter. Tony'll have to be careful.\n\n'Have some more chocolate, Nadine,' says Tony, snapping the bar in half. It's beautiful chocolate, dark and silky. Tony grins. He has a narrow wedge-shaped face and very short hair, black and shiny as wax. He's ugly, most of the time, but he has a warm Manchester voice and when he smiles his face matches it, lighting slowly from the eyes. 'You'll get fat,' he says now. 'Here, chop up these peppers for me.'\n\nYou think you see a pattern, you call it normality, but it's when you've known people well for a short time that you know them least. Better not to think of that. Better to think of Tony and Kai drinking round the kitchen table when she gets home from work, pouring another glass of wine for her. Tony always grumbles about the music Kai puts on the stereo. Peasant music, he calls it. She's always tired after hours in the cinema's headachy darkness, and she can't be bothered with anything but beans on toast. Sometimes Kai makes it for her. Once he scraped ice out of the fridge, packed it into a clean tea-towel and put it on Nadine's forehead because her head throbbed after hours of stuffy cinema darkness. They were like a family.\n\nTony takes off his jacket, eases out a pair of gold cuff-links, rolls up his sleeves, unwraps the veal and spreads it out. It glistens on the brand-new chopping board. Tony unzips the meat knife from its plastic shell with a razor-blade, and rinses it under the cold tap. Nadine puts out her finger.\n\n'Here, what you doing? You don't want to touch that,' says Tony. He dries the knife on a paper towel, then he unrolls the veal, flattens it with the back of the knife and begins rapidly to slice it into fine, almost translucent ribbons of flesh. The meat is nearly bloodless. It doesn't looks like flesh at all. Her mother would never have veal in the house, because it was cruel. Nadine watches the small muscles moving in Tony's forearms as veal ribbons peel away beautifully from one another, then spread out fanwise on the board. They look like the gills of oyster mushrooms. Certainly this meat doesn't look as if it was ever part of anything as warm and sweet-smelling as a calf. She's fed calves from a bucket on a farm holiday, and let them suck her fingers after with their warm rasping tongues.\n\n'Is Kai asleep?'\n\n'Yes, he was tired. No point waking him up to eat.'\n\n'Tired!' Tony sweeps the veal into a pile and begins on the sauce. 'What you been doing to him, eh, Nadine? You'll wear him out.'\n\nHe looks up from the meat and smiles. The smile is much too intimate, with a spice of contempt in it, as if he's been watching them from the foot of their bed. Both men are so much older than her. It's not surprising Tony's got some funny attitudes, she thinks. Tony's known Kai for years, ever since Kai came to England. She was a little kid then. To him she's someone of Kai's and he'll be nice to her as long as she's going out with Kai. He's never mentioned other girls of Kai's, the ones who came before her. Tony doesn't need to score easy points. His attitude to women is to do with the way he was brought up, Nadine reassures herself. He grew up in a close Italian web, that's what Kai says, even though his parents have lived in Manchester for thirty-five years. He has two ways of thinking about women: girls you fucked and girls you married. One way for a woman like Clara, another for me. He'd never dream of smiling at Clara like that. He knows there'd be consequences. Girls like Clara are chaperoned even when they go with their fianc\u00e9s to talk to the priest about their wedding.\n\nShe's seen Tony talking to Clara. The three of them were at the restaurant one Saturday night: Tony and Kai and Nadine. Clara was going out with her aunt. Clara worked in the restaurant all week, but now she shone out in her midnight-blue dress and her gold jewellery. The customers stopped eating to look at her, but they didn't stare. That wasn't the way. She progressed through the tables, stopping to talk to favoured customers. It was a Saturday night ritual. Tony stood up and pulled out a chair for her and there she sat for a few minutes, talking to him in Italian, her small lively hands smooth with cream and manicure, betrayed only by a nick at the base of her thumb. She nodded to Kai, but she didn't take any notice of Nadine.\n\nClara, a girl going out from her father's house, accompanied \u2013 no, chaperoned \u2013 by her aunt. But also a girl who more than earned her own living, who was not afraid of hard work and who helped to build up the family business. She had new ideas, and they worked. Her parents watch her with concealed vigilant satisfaction. Are they even a little afraid of Clara, who did so well at school and could easily have gone on to college if she'd wanted? Clara, whose English is the perfect English of a child born here, and yet who chooses to speak not only in Italian but in the dialect of her parents? One day she'll have a fine wedding, with embossed cards for the nuptial mass. She'll organize the catering and God help anyone who tries to put anything past Clara. She'll be back in the restaurant with her apron on the day after she returns from a magnificent honeymoon in New York and San Francisco. There are branches of her family in both cities, but naturally the young people will stay in expensive hotels,\n\nClara doesn't waste her time on Nadine, who has no family, no apparent qualifications, and who works in a job with no future. She lives in a house with two men and a crazy old woman who also has no family to look after her and who sings in the streets on Friday nights on her way home from the pub. Eccentric, eh? You could call it that. Nadine's here today, but who knows where she'll be tomorrow? You don't waste time on her. Once she's gone you'll never hear her name again, and you'll never know where she went.\n\nIt's completely different with girls like Clara. They know where they're going. No matter how short the journey, they give destinations and times of arrival. They are met by uncles who wouldn't dream of letting them carry any luggage but a handbag. They are kissed on both cheeks by aunts who cry a little at the sight of them, and exclaim that they're much too slim, they need feeding up. Clara knows where she belongs. She's never going to disappear.\n\nTony's sauce bubbles and thickens on the stove. The kitchen smells of basil and vaporizing wine and new bread. Nadine lays two places. They'll put some of the meat sauce in the ice-crater of the fridge for Kai to eat tomorrow. Tony stirs in the ribbons of veal until the meat whitens and loses its translucency. He turns the mixture once more, then reduces the flame. He throws two handfuls of fresh pasta into a panful of simmering water. The water swells up the sides of the pan and he calms it with a few drops of olive oil.\n\n'Two more minutes,' he warns Nadine. 'Give me the plates. But what the fuck's this?' He takes the lid off the small pan which holds Nadine's congealed and cooling ravioli and peers into it. 'Has the old bitch been in our kitchen again?' he asks. 'You'd better speak to her, Nadine. She's pushing her luck.' And with a flick of his wrist he shoots the tinned ravioli into the open bin.\n\n## _Eight_\n\n'I can't bring myself to do it. I just can't, that's all. It makes me go all goosey thinking about it.'\n\n'Yeah, well, you're not really trying, are you, Lila? A bright girl like you. You've just got to make the effort. This is a really big client we're talking about.'\n\n'I know he is, 'course I know that. I've seen him on television. I pretend I don't recognize him, though \u2013 I'm not stupid. It's not the client, Kai \u2013'\n\n'It'd better not be. He's the kind we want.'\n\n'I've got nothing against him. I didn't even mind that other stuff, I mean, I'd rather do it straight but there's no harm in it, after all, is there? That whip's just a toy; the worst thing is trying to keep a straight face. But if he wants more than that, there's girls that specialize aren't there? I mean it's like in the magazines. Some of them would make you sick. Girls doing it with donkeys. It's just not my cup of tea.'\n\n'Did you tell him that?'\n\n'Well \u2013 I did, sort of. But he kept on it was me he wanted to do it. He's got this thing about tall girls, and then me being blonde as well is just right, apparently.'\n\n'Listen, Lila. We can't afford to lose him. Just what did you say to him?'\n\n'I keep telling you, I didn't say anything. I just kept thinking, what if my Rosie was to come in and see me doing it. I mean, I know she's at the nursery and she can't, they would never let her out, but I just can't stop thinking about it. After all the trouble I had getting her to use her potty, if you get me. What's it going to look like? Him lying there with his mouth open and me weeing into it sort of thing? It's not what you'd want a child to see her mother doing.'\n\n'That's all he wants? Nothing else?'\n\n'Yeah. Would you believe it? I mean there's girls you can go to for that kind of stuff.'\n\n'I can't see the problem. He's taking the risk, not you. What with AIDS \u2013 still, it's not for us to say. He's the client.'\n\n'Is that all you can think of? Him getting AIDS? What about _me_ _?_ '\n\n'Lila, there's just no risk. OK, it's a bit childish, but why let it get to you? You didn't use to be like this.'\n\n'Yeah, but what's he going to want next? I mean, you don't know what he might move on to. There's no telling, is there? Where's it all heading?'\n\n'You ought to read the newspapers more, Lila, then you'd find out. He's going places. We need more clients like him. That's the way to get contacts. You want to read the City pages. Anyway, that sort of client, it's the one thing they want, nothing else. They don't change. They're stuck, you know, like a record going round and round.'\n\n'Yes, well, all the same. What I really wanted to say was, could you pass him on to one of the other girls \u2013 maybe Vick, she's done all that S & M and she doesn't mind \u2013'\n\n'Lila. Is Vick five foot ten? Has she got long blonde hair? Is she twenty-two? What'm I supposed to say, I chopped your legs off? This is business. If a man goes into the greengrocer's for apples he doesn't want turnips. What's your problem? It's a piece of piss. Don't you know science, Lila? Every single human being is ninety per cent water. You girls go to the toilet all day long. All you do is flush it away, nothing gained but extra work for the sewage pipes. And here's one of our best clients, brilliant future, going to pay well because you're special. _You,_ Lila. Not those other girls. He likes you. There's no question of passing him on to Vick or anyone else. Either you think it over properly or we lose a lot of money. And you know how I feel about that.'\n\n'It's Rosie I'm thinking of, really. I know it sounds silly. If you had kids of your own you'd know what I mean. It's not just me I've got to think of now. I mean, there's standards.'\n\n'Rosie is nice and safe in her nursery, Lila. Safe as houses. And that's the way we all want to keep it, don't we?'\n\n_'Kai_!'\n\n'Life is difficult, Lila. Sometimes we all have to do things we don't want. What about me? Don't talk to me about \"standards\". People doing what they're paid to do, that's standards. They know me at the nursery, you know. It's nice the way Rosie calls me Uncle Kai.'\n\n_'Kai, you wouldn't \u2013'_\n\n'So what you'll do is put on the gear \u2013 yeah, the black stuff \u2013 and those stockings and all the rest of it, and get Mr Famous Client flat on his back on the bed and spread your legs and piss right down his throat. And try and look as if you're having a nice time. You can think of little Rosie while you're doing it. And put a plastic sheet down on the mattress first. Your other clients won't like the smell.'\n\nRoom 7 in the Sports Hall smells of sweat. The room isn't big enough; the circus skills course was oversubscribed and even though they've had to turn people away there are still twenty people in here, juggling with balls and clubs and scarves. Cathy, the group leader, has two assistants with her who are working at full stretch. The bald white walls echo to encouragement and dropped balls. Here's Dacey who makes unicycles out of old bike frames; here's Sal who studied ballet for eight years before she gave it up and learned to fire-eat. Every move Cathy makes has the brilliant definition and larger-than-life quality of something done on a stage. She's teaching juggling basics again, patiently, to a couple of big-framed sixteen-year-old lads in singlets and tattoos. Almost all the circus skills clients are unemployed.\n\nCathy watches, moves, intervenes. She wears dusty red baggy trousers and a washed-out black vest. Her skin is deeply tanned and against it her eyes are pale, clear and restful. She's the full-timer, the professional. Born and raised in a tepee in Wales, she is twenty-one now and has been earning her living since she was fourteen. She travels, but not all the time. She'll be there at Glastonbury, or WOMAD, earning her living at the summer-long round of festivals. One season she was at Covent Garden; another at Edinburgh. She'll work with anyone, as long as they don't mess around. Either they want to do something, or they don't. On Saturdays she's down the Ring, juggling ball after ball into the air until she's hidden by a ripple of colour you can't follow, a fine fast blur of red and orange and violet and gold. She makes her juggling balls herself. Cathy fire-eats too: she loves fire. It makes money: there's something about a woman swallowing flames or passing them over her body so that they seem to lick the taut glistening skin which acts like a release-button on men's wallets. They don't see the sober careful business behind the thrill.\n\nCathy's patient with clumsy beginners, not so patient with smart-arses who want to stick to what they know rather than learn the new, the next, the more difficult trick. She likes Nadine. Nadine's got the right body to begin with, light and flexible and not too tall. A good sense of balance too, from years of ballet as a kid, like Sal. Lots of people come on to circus skills from dance. They can earn money. You can't busk on a couple of arabesques and a _pas de chat._\n\nThe place is full of kids. Fees are cut if you can show a UB40, and most of these can. Leggings, baggy t-shirts, shaved heads with a little slender plait making its way down the nape of a neck. You don't get the crusties here, though. These are the kids who still think there's some hope, and it's worth learning something new. Lots of them'll learn for a bit, then head for the resorts where people are in holiday mood with a bit of money to throw away.\n\nYeah, Nadine's all right. She's got the makings. Well coordinated, and she can concentrate. Amazing how many people can't. And she looks right too. That's important, though it's got nothing to do with ordinary good looks. It's the way someone can make you watch _her,_ not any of the others. That part's not so easy to teach.\n\nNadine's damp hair spikes up off her forehead. It's hot tonight. She's slower with clubs than balls. Can't get the rhythm right today; too slow. It's all a question of rhythm. Relax, says Cathy. Relax and keep your eye on the clubs. A trickle of sweat inches its way across Nadine's forehead.\n\nAfter the class Cathy stops Nadine on her way to the shower. 'You done any busking yet?' she asks.\n\n'No,' says Nadine.\n\n'Want to try?'\n\n'All right. I'd like to.'\n\n'O\u039a. I'll take you down the Ring one Saturday.'\n\nNadine nods, smiles, recognizing privilege. She rests her arms on a windowsill and leans her weight on them, cooling off, watching the room sideways. People are stopping now, packing away balls and clubs into the wicker hamper. Some bring their own stuff. A couple of kids laugh and fool, juggling their way across the room. The balls go up sloppily into the air.\n\n'Give them here,' says Cathy.\n\nAs they throw the balls to her, she catches them and sets them spinning. First they make a tight fast loop around her head, then they fluke higher and one's behind her back to be flipped up again and set sideways, over arm, under arm, the balls free and thoughtless as birds that always want to fly back to Cathy's hands. As suddenly as she started, she stops. The balls pour up under one raised leg, fly into her right hand and are neat in the basket. It's over. The kids lean against one another, watching, hoping she'll do more. But she doesn't. Cathy's timing is perfect.\n\nNadine strips off leggings, singlet and pants, and steps into the women's communal shower. A woman with a tiny girl at her knees presses the shower button beside her. The kid jumps in and out of needles of water. The mother is big-thighed, big-breasted, reaching up to soap herself, shutting her eyes to the spray of water. She is four or five months pregnant. She is lovely as she stoops awkwardly, legs straddling, picks the child out of the soapy water that swills in the shower stall, and rinses her off. The little girl squeals and flips her head back, mouth open, small perfect teeth showing. The mother smiles at Nadine sidelong, a proud, apologetic smile. 'Shut it,' she says tenderly to her daughter. 'Shut it now.'\n\n'Sukey, it's gone far enough. Too far.'\n\n'What can you mean, darling?'\n\n'This business with Enid. It isn't fair to her.'\n\n'Isn't it? I don't see why not.'\n\n'You're encouraging her. Putting ideas into her head. Having her here all the time. What about her job?'\n\n'Enid has a perfectly good job, Caro. She _is_ allowed a day off occasionally. Those brutes owed her some holiday. Poor lamb, she works like a slave.'\n\n'She'll lose her job, and then you'll be stuck with her. And you'll get bored, you always get bored. You know what you're like.'\n\n'I'm afraid I _don't_ know what I'm like, Caro. Have some of these dates: they're fresh. Basil sent them from Egypt in the diplomatic bag, can you imagine? Lots of date-y documents for the diplomats. I must just go and telephone \u2013'\n\n'Sukey, don't go! I've got to talk to you. It isn't a joke, it's serious. Why do you turn everything into a joke?'\n\n'Caro, darling, be reasonable. We're going to the cottage next week. We'll have all the time in the world. We'll sit in the garden and you can tell me anything you like and I promise I'll listen. There won't be any interruptions...;'\n\n'Oh, Sukey, darling, I can't believe it's ever going to happen. I can't wait to be there, just the two of us. Can you, darling? Aren't you awfully impatient?'\n\n'Awfully impatient, Caro. I'll telephone, then we'll talk about it some more. Ring for some iced tea, you look so hot...;'\n\n## _Nine_\n\nA bell drags Nadine out of sleep.\n\nOur room. The bell's still ringing. If I wait maybe they'll go away. Could be Tony, if he's forgotten his key. Nobody else'd come this early. Feel on the floor for t-shirt, clench it between my toes, get hold of it, shake it out and over my head. And run downstairs, combing my hair with my fingers. It'll be Tony for sure.\n\nNo. A tanned woman with hair pulled back in gold and silver streaks along her scalp, expensive sunglasses on a chain, gold chain, gold earrings. Make-up, tight smile and a row of perfect teeth. She stands there immaculate, looking at me. The sun makes me blink.\n\n'Sorry, I thought you were Tony...;' I apologize, and tug the t-shirt down my thighs.\n\n'Having a lie-in, were you? I don't blame you, I'd do the same myself if I had the chance.'\n\nNo, she wouldn't. This one would be up at dawn whatever happened, face-packing and leg-waxing, telephoning and doing her nails. Her fingers are perfectly manicured, her polished nails are curved ovals with an extra-long claw on the thumb. It must be nearly an inch long. She's like a Chinese nobleman, letting one nail grow so everyone knows she doesn't work with her hands. She'll have spent hours plumping the tiny wrinkles around her eyes with cream made from human placentas. Her hair's so perfect it looks like thin metal with a slick of gel. Then she'd have to floss and rinse and spit till those big teeth were free of plaque. It's a serious business, looking like that.\n\n'I kept on knocking but no one came, so I pulled the bell-rope. I don't know how you can stand the noise. You might as well be living next to a church. Not that they let them make that row these days, do they, churches in a residential area like this? People complain. And quite right too. I mean to say, I've nothing against religion \u2013'\n\n'It was here when we came. Part of the house. I quite like it.'\n\n'Oh, well, tastes differ, don't they? Kai about?'\n\n'He's away.'\n\n'Any idea when he's likely to be back?'\n\n'Tomorrow, I think. Unless he rings.'\n\nLess of the teeth shows now. A rim of white glistens, balked. What does she want? Why's she come to see Kai here, at this time?\n\n'Tony in?'\n\n'No.'\n\n'Gone off with Kai, has he?'\n\n'He might have done. I don't think so. He's probably around.'\n\nAnother blast of smile, woman to woman this time. She opens her handbag and scrabbles through it.\n\n'Oh, knickers, I haven't got a pen. I'm not doing very well, am I? Can I pop in a minute and leave a message for Kai?'\n\nI don't want her in our house, with her hard snooping eyes, but she steps into the doorway and I have to move back.\n\n'Mind where you tread with those heels. The boards are loose. Tony's been checking the gas pipes.'\n\n'Tony's a wonder, isn't he, the way he can turn his hand to anything? I've heard ever such a lot about the house. Kai was really keen. Potential, he said it had. And you can tell, can't you? That plaster moulding must be the original. Very classy.'\n\n'I wouldn't know. I'm not really interested in architecture.'\n\n'Well, not _as such,_ maybe. But it's different when it's your home, isn't it? You must be Nadine, have I got it right?'\n\nOh, she's got it off perfectly, that look of inquiry as if there might be any number of girls in here, all shacked up with Kai.\n\n'No, I'm Suzette. Who's Nadine?'\n\nA really sharp look this time, then an unwilling smile, the teeth again, and, 'I've heard ever so much about you from Kai. In here? Oh, _very_ nice. You must get the sun all day long in here. Now this would have been the morning-room, am I ri\u0123ht?'\n\n'You seem to know a lot about houses.'\n\n'Oh, well, you get to, don't you? You pick it up. You can't go anywhere without people wanting to tell you about their houses. You ought to go to Prague. 'Course it'll be spoiled soon, once they get more money. Miles to walk to the bathroom in the hotels, but if you want style that's where to go. There's one good thing about these countries that used to be Communist, they don't get mucked up. I remember one bloke had a castle \u2013 not in Prague, mind you, it was over here.'\n\n'What, a real one?'\n\n'Oh, yes, it was a real castle all right. He'd got the lot: sieges and cannon and boiling oil. But it was only small. Not famous or anything. In fact it was a bit rough on the outside. But he'd made it really nice inside. They'd turned the dungeon into a disco, with a light show. There was a band later on, and they put them in a sort of cage where they used to keep the prisoners. You'd never guess how they used to kill prisoners in the olden days, down in the dungeons.'\n\nWhy guess when you're going to be told anyway? Look at that bracelet going round and round on her wrist. She's getting excited. I can tell what kind of shivers it gives her.\n\n'No.'\n\n'Well, you have to imagine the dungeon down there, and a sort of chute from the tower above it. All dark and smelly then, not at all like it was when we were there. He'd done wonders with the place. What they'd do was they'd throw down animal carcasses \u2013 pigs and cows and so on, after they'd taken off most of the meat for the kitchens. Then they'd leave them to rot with the prisoners. Well, you can imagine they niffed a bit. The prisoners used to suffocate because the air was too bad to breathe. And then there'd be flies and maggots, and rats. They chained the prisoners to the walls so they couldn't move. Not even if a rat ran over them. It was this bloke's ancestors that did it all. If you were a guest at the castle you'd be brought to look down at the prisoners, just like going to look at a room someone's done up. And then go off and have your dinner. Well, I suppose people were different then. It makes you think, doesn't it?'\n\n'You'd think it'd be easier to hang them.'\n\n'Yes, but it was a deterrent. And the thing was that they died without a mark on them. Charlie explained the whole thing. You could say they'd died naturally, of plague or something.'\n\n'Well, perhaps not plague. It might put the guests off their dinner.'\n\nImpatient shrug. Narrowing of eyes. She thinks I'm taking the mickey.\n\n'I've always taken an interest in history, I'm funny like that. You can learn a lot if you keep your eyes and ears open, Nadine.'\n\n'You must be a friend of Kai's. I haven't met you before, though, have I?' I'd never forget those teeth.\n\n'No, but that's Kai, isn't it, he likes to keep things separate. So he went off this morning, did he?'\n\n'Yes, very early. He never wakes me up in the mornings.' There. Just so you know.\n\n'Yes, you need your beauty sleep, don't you? All those late nights.'\n\n'I'm ushering down at the Warehouse. They have late shows on Wednesdays and Saturdays.'\n\n'Oh \u2013 you work at that arts place? Not that I've ever been down there. How long've you been down here now \u2013 three weeks, is it?'\n\n'Four.'\n\n'So you're not really in the business yet? I must have got it wrong.'\n\n'Well, no,' says Nadine. 'Not as such. But this is only temporary. I'm thinking of starting something on my own later on.' There. Let her work that out.\n\n'Oh. But surely there's no need for that? Not with Kai to look after you. He could easily fix you up. Though you have to think ahead, I can quite see that.'\n\nAhead to the time when Kai's chucked me out, that's what she means. She's so sure of it. She knows how it goes. All that gold jewellery. At least she's got something to hang on to.\n\n'But there's the question of capital \u2013' I go on. Her face warms, brightens. For the first time I'm talking sense.\n\n'Oh, don't talk to _me_ about capital! I know exactly what you mean. Setting up on your own is no picnic. Everything's tied up with forms. I was at my insurance adviser's last week to talk about a little PEP plan for my Donna \u2013 but the fuss they make you wouldn't believe, contacting your tax office, loads of forms. And they've even changed the name of the scheme. Well, I turned round and told him I might as well keep my money in a sock under the bed.'\n\nReally animated now. Warming to me. I'm not such a fool as I look. Not such a fool as I look standing here in my baggy t-shirt, thinking I'm young, I'm OK, I don't need to bother with makeup or good clothes. One curve-clawed hand fastens on my arm. She's not as tall as I am so she has to look up. She makes me feel clumsy and big. Confiding flower-like eyes, only I'm pretty sure they're tinted contact lenses. Fixing me with those eyes she coos, 'And then there's security. That's such a big worry.'\n\nI lean back a little from the lipstick smell of her mouth. I haven't brushed my teeth yet this morning and I'm sure my own breath smells of last night's garlic. 'But for now, I'm happy enough at the Warehouse. It's not hard work. I'd pay to see the films anyway, and you get some interesting people.'\n\n'Oh, I'm sure you do. That's what it's all about, isn't it \u2013 contacts. Mind you, so does Kai. Meet people I mean. Very interesting, some of them. Have you got a bit of paper and I'll just write my little note? But maybe you don't meet many of them \u2013 Kai's and Tony's friends? Business contacts, I should say \u2013 it comes to the same thing with Kai and Tony, doesn't it?'\n\nA cat-like look turns her mouth into a muzzle. She's watching me intently, very close, wondering how much more she can play with me. Wondering how much I know.\n\n'Is this pad big enough? I can get you an envelope if you like.'\n\n'Oh, it's nothing _private._ Just a little note. An arrangement Kai asked me to confirm. I am being rude, aren't I? I know your name, and you don't know mine. I'm Vicki. Vick. Bugger this bracelet. It's my wrists, really. Can I find anything to fit in the shops? Can I Christmas. Not even in Bond Street. Too slim, they all say. No, it has to be Hatton Gardens and custom-made, and you know what _that_ costs.'\n\n'It's very pretty.'\n\n'I suppose it's not bad. A lot of people don't know quality when they see it, do they? They think everything's paste. Just as well, with all these muggers about. This area's gone down a lot. They're quite good stones apparently. You have to be careful with diamonds, you can get taken for a ride. But perhaps you're not very interested in jewellery? You look more the natural type of girl. Green. Your hair's lovely, though. I like the style, it's very unusual. And you can get away with it at your age.'\n\n'You could write your name on the window. Don't diamonds cut glass?'\n\n'Quite a lot of people have already, haven't they, from the look of it? I can't bear dirty windows myself. I have to get going with a wash-leather, even in someone else's place. I'm funny like that. A bit like Kai, really. You know what he's like about dirt. Don't get all worried, though, Nadine, I'm not going to start having a go _at your_ windows. I can see you're all upside-down still. A place like this is an investment, isn't it? Not like a home. Do it up and move on. I don't know that I'd fancy it myself, not knowing what sort of people were here before me. I like new houses. I mean, you wouldn't wear someone else's old clothes, would you? And a house is much more personal. A bit like underwear. Nearly done. There, now if I give that to you, you can pass it on to Kai for me, can't you? Just say Vicki popped round. He'll know what it's about. Well, see you again, Nadine. Now we've got to know one another, we can have a real chat next time. My daughter's got her Grade 3 violin exam this morning and she's a bag of nerves, so I've got to get back to take her to the examination centre. Silly, really, 'cos she's ever so talented. She's had a very good teacher. You've got to be prepared to pay if you want to get anywhere. Do you ever go to the sauna at the Swift Health Club?'\n\n'No.'\n\n'Oh, I thought you would. Kai's ever so keen on saunas. I suppose it's to do with him being Finnish. You ought to come along one day with me and Lila \u2013 she's another girl I know. She's in the business too. You ought to meet Lila, I think you two would get on. She's got a lovely little girl. Rosie. Have you got any kids yourself, Nadine?'\n\n'Well, I have got a little boy. But I put him into care \u2013 it seemed the best thing to do, considering.'\n\n'Did you? Well of course you know best. I know it can be tricky when a girl's on her own. But you're not on your own now, are you? Kai's very fond of kiddies, you'll find. You ought to talk to Lila. The toys Kai's bought for Rosie! Uncle Kai, she calls him. How old is your little one?'\n\n'Six. Nearly seven.'\n\n'Oh, my God, you got started early, didn't you, Nadine? How old are you now, if you don't mind me asking?'\n\n'Nineteen,' I lie, as I've lied at work.\n\n'Oh, that's terrible. Oh, you've really upset me now. You must have been the same age as my Donna when you had him.'\n\nShe is really shocked. I've touched a nerve under the year-round crocodile tan.\n\n'Sorry, Vicki. I was only kidding.'\n\nAn explosion of teeth. 'Lucky I didn't go and tell Lila. She's got no sense of humour at all. I'll give you a ring about that sauna, then, shall I? I've got your number. Nice to meet you, Nadine.'\n\nI shut the door behind her, open the window to let out the dark smell of her perfume. Enid is calling. How long has she been calling? Her voice sounds little and lost and old.\n\n'Nadine! Nad-eeeen!'\n\nEnid trembles on the landing in her sunshine-yellow pyjamas.\n\n'Oh, Nadine. Oh, Nadine. Oh, I've had such a terrible dream.'\n\nI put my arm around her. She is vibrating. Maybe it's shock?\n\n'Come and lie down. You look really ill.'\n\n'I can't go back in there. I'll get that dream again. Let me just sit down here a minute and get my breath back.'\n\nShe sits on the landing, small and shrivelled, her knees drawn up to her chin, her wispy hair disarranged so that looking down I see pink bald patches on her skull. I put my arm round her shoulder and smell her bird's nest smell.\n\n'I'll be all right in a minute.'\n\nBut she's very pale and her mouth is open a little, panting. Her colour is bad. I wonder if I should get Dr Govind.\n\n'You ought to lie down, Enid. Shall I ring the doctor?'\n\n'No. No.'\n\n'Come into my room. Kai's not here. You can lie down on our bed. It won't bring your dream back in there.'\n\n'I couldn't go in there. Your Kai wouldn't like it.'\n\n'Enid, don't be silly. He's away. He won't know.'\n\n'He'd find out. He's the sort that finds out everything.'\n\nShe won't move and she doesn't want a drink of water, so we sit there while the trembling settles and her colour becomes yellowish again rather than dead white. Or is it just the reflection of her pyjamas? I can't be sure. She ought to see the doctor but she won't. Someone else fetched Dr Govind when she had pneumonia. She's frightened they'll put her in a home, though I keep telling her they won't do that, they're only too glad if people can manage at home. And she believes that the body can look after itself if it's not filled with drugs to upset the balance. Dr Govind gave her sleeping tablets and she's never touched them.\n\n'If you feel better tonight, we'll go out to the pub. A couple of ginger wines will warm you up.'\n\nEnid pulls her shoulders back and sniffs. She's really looking better.\n\n'Thank you, dear. I shall be able to go back into my room in a minute. Did you have a visitor? I thought I heard voices.'\n\n'Yes, it was someone Kai knows.'\n\n'I thought it was. I knew I'd heard that voice before.'\n\n'No, you must have mistaken her for someone else. It's the first time she's been here.'\n\n'I don't want to contradict you, Nadine dear, but she has most definitely been here before. Wait a minute. It'll come back to me.' She stares down at her knees, then up at me triumphantly. There's even a hint of colour in her face now. 'Blonde woman, big teeth. One of those voices that goes through you like a saw. I've heard her laughing. She looks like a horse when she laughs.'\n\nMaybe Enid was looking down over the banisters when Vicki and I went across the hall. She likes to know what's going on. Often when I look up from the hall or the landing I can sense she's there. No \u2013 she can't have seen Vicki this morning, because she's only just woken up from a nightmare. And she can't be faking that because she really looked ill. Or could it have been something else which frightened her, not a dream at all? Vicki can't have frightened her. So Vicki's been here before. No use asking Enid about it now.\n\n'I wouldn't trust that one, Nadine. Not if I was you. She may pretend it's the first time, but she _has_ been here before, and more than once. I remember one night I heard her laugh. I looked down but it was dark.'\n\n'You're imagining things. I'm here every night.'\n\n'Yes, but sometimes you don't get in until late, do you, dear? Not when they have those late-night shows. But you know me, I'm always here. I shut my door and put on my music. I don't want to hear anything.'\n\n'It's just a business thing.'\n\n'I'm not saying any different. Business is business and it's got nothing to do with me. I don't want to know about business. I'm only saying, she's been here before. I'm not saying what or why or when or who.'\n\nEnid's here all the time. You get used to her, like you do to a bird which has made its nest in your chimney. That's how Kai thinks of Enid, I'm sure. He'd like to poke her out of the nest she's made, then fetch a brush and sweep out the nest itself and every trace of Enid would be gone. He'd do it if he wasn't afraid of the mess she'd make. She wouldn't go quietly. She'd scream and shout and cry in the square and all the neighbours would know. Someone might even call the police, though I don't think so, not here. Kai doesn't want that.\n\nKai doesn't know Enid, not like I do. He thinks she's stupid, a stupid, dirty, awkward old bird who came with the house, one he can't get rid of, not yet. He had the lawyers look into it, but they told him she had her rights as a sitting tenant. He knew that anyway, when he bought the house. I don't know why he bothered with the lawyers. He must have pretended to himself that she'd just disappear when we moved in, leaving another empty room in the attic. But Enid isn't a stupid old bird. Enid thinks. She's here, and she thinks and she listens. The doors don't close properly in this house, with all the doorknobs missing. Does Kai ever think about what Enid hears, or what she sees? She's got enough sense not to let anything slip in front of Kai and Tony. Anyway they never talk to her. It's their way of pretending she's not here. If they don't notice her then she doesn't exist. But Enid will tell me. She trusts me...;\n\n'I should forget it, Enid.'\n\n'You're a good girl, Nadine. And I'm good at forgetting. But you don't want to go making a friend of that one. Not even if your Kai wants you to. I wouldn't trust her. She's got a look in her eyes like someone I used to know.'\n\n'Kai doesn't know anything about it. He didn't even know she was coming this morning.'\n\n'Didn't he? Well, you know best. But when you're young you shouldn't need to be forgetting things all the time. You need your memories when you get to my age.'\n\nShe hauls on my arm to stand up, then straightens herself carefully and swings one knee back and forth, testing the joint.\n\n'Just a silly turn,' she says, suddenly buoyant again. She pats my arm reassuringly. This is always happening with Enid and me. One moment she's leaning on me like a small bony child, the next she casts me off as if I'm the one who needs her. And the door shuts, like my parents' bedroom door shutting on me when I was little.\n\n'Time I got dressed,' she says briskly and scuttles up to her room, closing the door firmly. And there I am in my stale t-shirt at the top of the stairs.\n\nI go back to my room and pick up my tapestry, squat cross-legged on the bed and begin to cross-stitch the back of a kitten. I'm angry with Enid. There are three kittens in the tapestry, one arched across a rug, digging in its claws, another savaging an apple, a third running off after the mother cat whose tail is just flicking out of the tapestry frame. Why does Enid have to keep on about things? OK, we all know Kai and Tony aren't Marks & Spencer. But if I can live with it, why's she got to keep on asking questions? These kittens are lovely. They are real kittens, not cute at all. Lulu will like them. She will keep the tapestry on her knee, stabbing at it with her wild hands, cuffing the frame. She will go to bed with it at night until she has worn it out.\n\n'Oh, look, Lulu, a present from your sister.'\n\nLulu will make throaty noises of excitement and lunge forwards in her wheelchair, but the safety strap will hold her. They don't take any risks now, not after Lulu fell out and gashed her head on the corner of the fridge-freezer.\n\n'Lulu, look. Kittens. Your favourite. Nadine made it for you. Deenie!' Deenie. It sounds so intimate, the kind of nickname you'd give to a child who couldn't say her own name. Then you'd hold on to it out of love long after everyone had forgotten where the nickname came from. But they only made it up for Lulu. To make things easier for Lulu. That cry of pain which means Nadine. My sister. But they mustn't get her too excited or she'll start screaming. Three black and white kittens on a background of red. Lulu will like the red.\n\n'For heaven's sake, Nadine, leave your mother alone. Can't you see she's worn out. She's been looking after Lulu all day. Have some sense.'\n\nI shrink back across the long unkempt grass, back into the shadow of the mock-orange blossom. Mother has been exercising Lulu's legs on a rug in the sun, bicycling them up and round, up and round, like daisy wheels in the sun while I blink and watch. Lulu loves it. It's so exciting, she's choked with it. Mr Gargoyle looks over the fence and frowns. Lulu screams.\n\n'Oh, hello, Mr Garrigle, oh dear, I'm so sorry about all the noise...;'\n\nShe isn't sorry at all. Her fierce face flames at Mr Gargoyle. She's angry. Lulu's legs thrash weakly, the sun pours down, I want a drink.\n\n'For God's sake, Nadine, what is it now?'\n\n'How many times have I got to tell you to leave your mother alone? All the other children are playing out. Off you go, out into the lane.'\n\nPick, pick, through the strong linen goes my needle, piercing an eye for a kitten, a chewed segment of apple. Why should Kai be blamed? It's not his fault Enid was here first, and he's never done anything to her. He's not trying to get her out, and plenty of landlords would. There are ways. Enid doesn't know how lucky she is. You can't afford to be sentimental in property.\n\nI keep thinking about the banknotes, and the smell of money. It has a safe smell. I know Kai's into some stuff. I'm not stupid. And I don't particularly want Vicki here, any more than Enid does. But you can't be that rigid. You have to let her in. Pass, friend, pass, business associate. Kai keeps saying these are difficult times. _Life is difficult, Nadine._ You raise money on property you've bought with money you've raised on property you've bought with money you've \u2013 It's like defying gravity on a fairground ride that pins you to the wall by centrifugal force. It whips round faster and faster, and then they take the floor away and you look out level with the weathercock on the church tower. The thing is not to look down. The money'll keep on balancing as long as no one realizes there isn't anything underneath. Why should Enid keep going on about it? Why should anyone?\n\nAnd one thing I do know is that Kai's clean. That used to worry me, because of all the money. I thought he must be dealing. But I know there's nothing like that. That one time I scored some dope from Chris and I was in here smoking a joint when Kai came back. Never again. I was amazed \u2013 why make such a fuss? After all, everybody does it. I'd have thought Kai would have known that. But he made me promise, never again. Never anything. Never in the house. It was easy to promise. All I wanted it for was so I could lie and listen to music when Kai was away and time could come apart and loop and loop and loop like someone drawing big circles freehand. I'd had enough of time jerking from minute to minute and me having to watch it. But it always seemed to end up making me feel sad. So I didn't mind not smoking it any more. I started doing cross-stitch and it worked nearly as well. And I've never touched anything else. I didn't really mind that Kai was so angry. It made me feel safe. Looked after...;\n\n... like I felt when I first met Kai. When he had that old blue van, and he used to meet me out of school. I don't know what he was doing up in the Midlands \u2013 business again, I suppose. I thought he lived there, I thought that little flat by the park was his home, not just one of the places he stayed in. Every day I walked through the school gate, and under the laurels, and down to the tunnel, and there was Kai. He'd always have something for us to eat. He said I wasn't eating properly. He brought food in white paper carriers from the delicatessen: tunafish sandwiches with mayonnaise, chicken tikka, gherkins, fat black olives. I was worried in case the gherkins made my breath smell, but Kai didn't care. And always cakes. Greek honey cake, and a cake with poppyseed paste in the middle, and small bitter-chocolate cakes with almond slivers sticking out of them. Once we had fresh dates \u2013 the first time I'd tasted them. I liked the white papery shell round the stone. We ate in the van, or in the street, or in the park. And we drank polystyrene cups of coffee, and vodka. It was all right to drink vodka, everyone said, because no one could smell the alcohol on you afterwards. I used to meet Kai in school dinner-times, so it was important not to smell of drink. But I'd stretch the time out, invent a library period, say I was practising for my French oral...; I don't know if anyone noticed. I don't think they cared. I'd stopped caring about marks, or what they thought of me. Books made my head ache. If I looked hard at the blocks of black print little bits would change back from black cross-stitch to words, but only a line at a time and by the time I'd laboured through one I'd forgotten what came before. And I could never join it up to what went after. It was like doing one of Enid's jigsaws where all the pieces are sky. Little, even-shaped pieces, prickling on the page.\n\nThe van always smelled of oil. I didn't mind, I like smells of oil and petrol, and cigarettes when they've just been lit. It was old and the seats were real leather, but cracked and crazed so that the stuffing was leaking out of them. And you could feel the springs when you leaned back. I used to shut my eyes and feel the sun on my face and Kai would drive and I wouldn't even know where we were going. Only the sun behind my eyelids and a dark shadow when we went past a building, or a slow tilt at a roundabout, and then a long road, gathering speed, the van roaring and the heat spreading out all round us while the wind pulled at my hair. I could give up everything. I didn't have to think. If I could have chosen I'd never have gone home. Once I heard Kai laugh and I knew he was looking at me. I felt so safe with him.\n\n## _Ten_\n\nPaul Parrett turns off the video, rubs his eyes, swivels and looks out of the window. Dawn has come since he last looked round. He's been awake all night. It doesn't matter. It's Saturday and he'll catch up with a couple of hours' sleep in the early afternoon. It's going to be a quiet day. The House is empty. Times are jittery and no one can afford to sit back for a four-year ride, not the way things are now. Back to the constituency to attend Red Cross summer fairs, village donkey derbys, Polish ex-servicemen's dinners, surgeries, tenants' association meetings on draggled estates where you get lost and reverse furiously between Skylark Crescent and Goldfinch Gardens. But not too furiously. There are no votes in running over your constituents.\n\nHe has a safe seat close to London and an excellent agent who judges to the second when and where a personal appearance is called for. The newspapers are always there when Paul Parrett comes. The crowds doughnut eagerly for TV newsbites. It's not just to do with him being a minister either. His constituents actually seem to like him. How does the bugger do it, his fellow MPs grumble as they struggle into cabs to Paddington, Euston or King's Cross on Friday nights.\n\nIt is a fucking depressing video and he's going to have to watch it again. But he's hungry for something sweet first. He'll make pancakes with real maple syrup. He's been hooked ever since that first fact-finding tour to the US, when was it? Twelve years, it must be. He dumps eggs, flour, melted butter, milk into a blender and whizzes the mixture while he greases the pan. He flips down the button of his kitchen CD player and Cajun music floods out. The Alley Boys of Abbeville. Terrific. For a heavy man he's light on his feet as he shimmies sideways, ladles pancake batter to fall hissing against the frying pan, puts a plate to warm and opens another bottle of syrup. Someone brings it over from Vermont for him. He remembers apples heaped against red barns, fat lolling squash, the smell of frost. But the music takes him south and he goes lightly across the kitchen, turns and _chass\u00e9s,_ playing an imaginary fiddle. The surface of the pancake pales as it cooks through. He slips the edges loose, hesitates, tosses. It goes up and lands in a crisp bubbly brown circle. Perfect. He waits a minute for the other side to cook, then dances down the kitchen again, frying pan in hand, and tosses the pancake in mid-turn. It turns twice in the air but flips down on the right side. His hands just can't do wrong. He turns up the volume and trickles maple syrup in a thin stream, making lattice on the pancake. Then he rolls it up, swallows it in half a dozen bites and drops another half-ladle of batter on to the circle of hot heavy iron. Something to drink too. After all, it's five a.m. Not brandy \u2013 Armagnac. There's some somewhere, there's some of everything somewhere. He finds the long wooden coffin they pack it in, pours the drink into a glass, pours more over the cooked pancake and sets light to it. It flares up and he eats it the second the flames go out, buttery, crisp and soaked in booze.\n\nNow for that bloody video. He runs it back, finds the place, leans forward feeling for the pad and pen by the side of his chair.\n\n'His wife has brought up the four boys on her own,' says the commentator. An image flashes up, a still. She mustn't have wanted them to be filmed. Four boys, twelve, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen. All the bottom rungs of the ladder are missing: the kids she'd have had if her husband hadn't been in prison for eleven and a half years. They had both loved kids. A voice-over tells the thin factual tale of the solid wall of justice coming down on this family like a tidal wave, smashing it flat. One of the boys had cancer. He'd had a bone-marrow transplant and he seemed to be doing well. She'd coped with that on her own, along with everything else. The woman was thirty-five and she looked fifty, though maybe that was the lighting and the dark plain jumper and her hair pulled back like that. She'd look different in the film of her husband's release. She'd have her hair done and she'd be wearing something new and somebody'd have told her to put on some make-up, for the cameras if not for her husband.\n\nBut that film hadn't been made yet. Paul Parrett goes back again, replays. The usual story. Contradictions in the forensic evidence, allegations of police brutality, a time-gap which no one's explained, an alibi which might stand or might not depending on who was looking at it. It had been the kid's birthday, the eldest one.\n\n'He was there. He lit the candles. He'd never've missed Paul's birthday.'\n\nPaul Parrett feels the small flicker at the sound of his own name. Evidence has been built on less than such a small flicker, he knows. He can't help a moment of empathy for a father who would never miss the birthday of his little son called Paul. Evidence, evidence. He knows about evidence.\n\n_'Why are you lying there looking as if butter wouldn't melt_? _I know you've been up to something. I know what you've been up to.'_\n\n_'Don't pretend you don't know what I mean. I can see right through you.'_\n\n_'If it wasn't you done it, then why are you looking at me so innocent_?'\n\nThe past's a great place, he thinks, as long as you don't have to live in it. The way that family's had to. The forensic expert's dead and dodgy, the two detectives from a well-known squad have admitted fabricating evidence on another case. Yes, he decides, that film's going to be made, the one where the wife buys a new red dress which doesn't suit her and has her hair coloured as well as permed, and wears lipstick which all comes off because she can't stop biting her lips just in case, at the very last moment, it's all going to be snatched from her. And the boys'll be wearing their jeans and huge trainers, hair gelled into place, eyes wary. They know about cameras and what newspapers can do. And there'll be a crowd of well-wishers, campaigners, family members, hangers-on, surging around the court gates. They'll look angrier than the family and maybe more joyful. The well-wishers haven't gone through these gates a hundred times.\n\nYes, the film's got to be made. It needs research, production, costing. The budget is going to be enormous. Appeals are getting slammed back these days. There's a reaction after the wave of appeals which ended in men and women walking out of the dock into the world. In these cases there are all kinds of costs to be taken into consideration. Public confidence in British justice, for instance.\n\nBut the film will be made. He already knows some of the actors. The programme researchers and the presenter he's just watched will be in it. Miscarriages of justice are their field. They know the score. Judge and lawyers are variables. The family have already got their parts. They live in role. And the man in prison too, and the three men convicted with him. The Manchester Four, they call them now. Safe casting: they aren't going to run away.\n\n'Fuck it,' says Paul Parrett aloud, writing notes on his pad. The things that happen in daylight, under the camera's eye \u2013 they're not the point. The point is kids lying awake in bed at night, wondering what the fuck is going to happen to them now.\n\n## _Eleven_\n\nAs the credits start to roll, Nadine pulls back the door and fastens its hook, letting in the light from the corridor outside. Then the auditorium lights go up, small orange bulbs in the comfortable gloom, and people pick their way over one another, commenting on the film. They've all seen it before. The point of the film season isn't to go to films new and na\u00efve and ready for enjoyment. This is the Warehouse's Icons of Sexuality season: Monroe this week, Garbo next, Mae West the week after. Talks at seven o'clock, before the screenings, drinks afterwards. Tonight there was a discussion on glamour and feminism, but Nadine wasn't ushering for that. It's the third time Nadine has seen _Some Like It Hot._ She listens to the comments of the departing patrons, as they move along to the complex's caf\u00e9 which overlooks the water. Now they'll sprawl at fragile metal tables, drinking expensive bottled beers and tiny cups of overboiled coffee. Stumbling and blinking, they brush past her. Chris, the usher from Cinema 2, pushes his way in against the tide. His show ends about ten minutes before hers.\n\n'Coming for a drink, Nadine?'\n\nShe shakes her head. 'No, I got to get back. I promised Enid I'd see her. Kai and Tony are away again.'\n\nChris has never met Enid, Kai or Tony, but he knows who they are. There are lots of dead hours with nothing happening, when Chris and Nadine talk.\n\n'Just a quick one? I've got something to tell you.'\n\n'Well...;' Nadine hesitates. But Kai's away \u2013 he won't look up and frown as she comes in and say that he thought the show finished at ten this week. And Enid is awake until all hours, night after night. She won't mind what time Nadine comes, as long as she comes.\n\n'O\u039a, then. I'll check the auditorium and lock up. Be down in about five minutes.'\n\n'There's no rush. I'll wait here.'\n\nThey go along the corridor into the smoky caf\u00e9. A soft dull roar of conversation folds around them.\n\n'And her arse when she walks down the platform...;'\n\n'Yes \u2013 those amazing buttocks.'\n\n'But she's so _lovable_!' cuts in a girl's voice, 'Don't you see \u2013 it's not just a sexual thing. I mean, it makes _me_ want to take her home and look after her, and I'm not gay or anything. It's sort of innocent.'\n\n'That cotton-candy hair.'\n\n'Did you see that film they found, from _Something's Got to Give_ _?_\n\n'Amazing.'\n\n'Of course she'd lost a lot of weight.'\n\n'Fifteen pounds.'\n\n'Yeah \u2013 she _was_ a bit overweight in _Some Like It Hot.'_\n\n'That just shows how your ideas about female beauty have been conditioned by fashion models.'\n\n'Did you see the autopsy photos?'\n\nChris winks at Nadine. Everyone's seen the autopsy photos, they're the thing to talk about. Marilyn Monroe with her face pocked in death. Bruises, splats of decay. Her jaw fallen, her cheeks pouched, her hair flat and stringy. Less beautiful, at last, than any of us.\n\nSoon they're tucked into a corner by the bar, drinking. The wine is very dry, just like drinking stone, Nadine thinks.\n\n'How's Mark?'\n\n'Oh, he's fine. Except I never see him \u2013 he's working late on a commission every night, then he's away to the studio again before I wake up.'\n\n'It must be big business, jewellery,' says Nadine, who has none.\n\n'Well, it is, once you start making serious pieces,' agrees Chris with eager vicarious pride. 'This is for a Nigerian client. He came into Mark's exhibition and took three pieces straight away. The neckpiece and gold bangles. And now there's this commission as well. You've got to ride the wave.'\n\nNadine swills her wine round in her glass and stares into it. She and Chris sound like children boasting about their parents. The big people: the people who do things. Kai's done this. Mark's done that. Only she's more subtle than Chris, knowing that he'll gladly swallow every hint from her secret world.\n\n'So what was it \u2013 what you wanted to talk about?'\n\nChris gulps his wine and answers, 'There's a job coming up here. A proper job.'\n\nYes, there it is again, his childhood in his voice. Echoes of mothers, of 'standards'. _\u039b proper job._ All the things he's supposed to have grown out of.\n\n'Where?'\n\n'Programming assistant. You must have heard about it?'\n\nHe is looking at her sharply. He's been here much longer than she has, and no permanent vacancies have come up in that time. She's temporary, casual labour, and so's Chris, even though he knows everything about how things work here.\n\n'I didn't know anything about it. Are you going to apply?'\n\n'I might. What about you?'\n\n'Me? How could I? I don't know anything about it.'\n\n'Of course you do. You know quite a lot about films. You could read. There's loads of good books. You'd soon learn how to build up a programme. How do you think Richard started? He hasn't got a masters in film studies, that's for sure.'\n\nNadine drinks before she answers. Chris isn't really talking to her: he's persuading himself. It's obvious that he wants the job. Anyway she can't apply. She'd never be able to hide the way words dazzle and won't do what her mind wants. There'd be an application form, national insurance details. They all think she is nineteen.\n\n'No, I don't want anything permanent just now. I don't want to tie myself down. I might go to a few festivals with Cathy. I'd like to do that.'\n\n'How are you getting on?' He knows about her juggling, and approves. Everybody's doing it now, even in serious theatre. Circus skills. Tumbling and juggling and swallowing fire and hustling for pound coins. If Nadine gets really good, all sorts of things might open up. Film companies are always looking for people. Look at those Angela Carter films.\n\n'Cathy's going to take me down the Ring.'\n\n'You must be getting good. I've seen her there.'\n\n'Yes,' she says, stretching in her chair, feeling the new suppleness Cathy's building into her muscles. 'Yes, I like it. It feels good.'\n\n'I'm thinking of going for it myself,' says Chris and swallows wine. 'The job, I mean.'\n\n'You should. Mark's doing so well now \u2013' She doesn't go on. She shouldn't have said anything. Chris has tensed up, and no wonder. Mark is beginning to get clients, to travel. There's talk of a one-man show, a big one this time. And there's money coming in, money which Chris can't match. People at parties talk to Mark first, then turn politely to Chris. 'And what do you do, Chris?' 'Oh \u2013 I work at the Warehouse.' If he's lucky there are no more questions, and they leave it that he might be a photographer, a video-maker or an exhibition organizer. If they cut to the bone Mark's suddenly there, casually close, casually sexy, making it all right. But that can't last for ever.\n\n'Anyway, I shan't be applying,' says Nadine. 'So the field's clear for you.'\n\n'Veronica's bound to \u2013 and she's tough, she'll talk her way into anything,' he says gloomily, staring across the caf\u00e9 at Veronica, her glossy wedge of hair slipping forward as she points out something on her clipboard. She's talking to Richard again. Veronica likes working in public. She's never self-conscious, only perhaps a trace more focused and professional when she senses eyes on her. Nadine watches Chris watching Veronica. Yes, he's right to be worried. She's a winner, and he isn't. Chris turns back to Nadine.\n\n'I like your hair. Where did you get it done?'\n\n'It was somebody Tony knew. She doesn't work in a salon, she comes to the house.'\n\nNadine's dark hair has been cut short so that it waves around her head and curls in at her nape. It is even shorter than she wore it at school and much better cut. A disturbing look: boy\/girl, yes\/no. It was Tony who shaped out the cut in the air for Francesca, Tony who flipped over style books and scooped Nadine's hair off her face to judge the effect. Kai was away at the time. It was going to be a surprise for him, Tony said.\n\n'It looks good,' says Chris. 'Androgynous. Very sexy. Does Kai like androgynous girls?'\n\nNadine blushes faintly, remembering how Kai had reacted to the haircut that night when he got home. She thought Tony'd wanted this too. It had been part of the pattern he'd sketched in the air for Francesca. Tony made you feel naked to him. He was there in the bedroom shadows, noiseless, waiting and watching for what he already knew was going to happen.\n\n'You can't go on ushering here for ever. What about going to college? You could easily get some \u0391-levels,' says Chris.\n\n'I like it here. Where else could I see all these films without paying? And it's Garbo next week. My heroine.'\n\n'Is she? Lots of women go for Garbo, did you know?'\n\n'Mmm. I can see why.'\n\nNadine thinks of Garbo's eyelids, faintly vaselined, gleaming, and the star's face turning into camera, breaking into movement. She stops listening to Chris. Besides, she ought to get home. She's said too much. Why does she always tell Chris things?\n\n'I owe you a drink,' she says. 'I'll get it, but then I've got to go. Enid likes to chat \u2013 you know how it is.'\n\nThat was safe ground. Never, never had she heard Chris admit that he did not 'know how it is' about anything. She bought him another glass of Muscadet and watched him cross the room towards Richard and Veronica as she made her way out of the caf\u00e9. They did not look up or seem to notice him. Chris would be running over his opening line in his head as he approached.\n\nThe rear lights of the bus wink triumphantly as it moves off just as Nadine crosses the green. It rumbles away uphill, tauntingly slow at first, then gathering speed.\n\n'Have you got the price of a cup of tea?' asks a voice from the ground. He is sitting in a pool of shadow under a lime tree. He does not ask for change; he has no dog or musical treatment, no baby in a pram. He has been asking for the price of a cup of tea for twenty years, and he will not change his begging now to fit in with these young ones. Long-haired, deeply weathered as he aged in public, often reading, he was unique in the district and known by name, Samuel. Little children pointed at his nest of beard and coiled greying hair, and sometimes their mothers put ten pence into their hands to give him. An object lesson. But you can't encourage children to do that sort of thing now, when there are hundreds of beggars all over the city.\n\nThis long uphill street is still Samuel's patch. He's usually on the green at night, under a tree, even now when the new rash of homelessness has queered most of the pitches. Nadine always gives him something. Remembering the price of the wine she has just drunk, she feels for the dead metal of a pound coin in her purse and drops it into his raised hand. A stink of burnt fat rolls from the open door of the Burger Bar, and the doorman at Club Suzie shifts his feet and looks at Nadine, but she goes past. A couple eat, spotlit in the window of a trattoria, looking intimately into one another's eyes as if they are being paid by the hour to do so. Nadine goes by within six inches of them, on the other side of the glass, not disturbing their gaze. She can walk faster in the dark, swinging uphill, breasting the warm night and the pulse of music and beery gusts from pub ventilators.\n\nShe turns off into tall silent streets where the lamps don't work and the trees are overgrown, tapping windows, scratching heaps of builder's rubble in skips. A retaining wall bulges towards her. She steps off the broken pavement and walks in the middle of the road. She passes a street light which works and her blunt orange shadow trails out behind her. She doesn't like it when her shadow is behind her. If someone steps on your shadow they possess your soul.\n\nNo, I'm not frightened, she thinks. Come out, come out, wherever you are, she sings softly as she chanted in the playground once, but no one answers. Black summer leaves hiss above her head. The honeyed smell of waste land buddleia drifts past like someone's perfume, then there's a burning smell of fox. There are foxes all over the city. She has watched them from the balcony in the early mornings, walking down the street with their heads up, long claws ricking on the pavement. Their ears are big and pointed. They have the perfect self-possession of actors. They map the city secretly, at odds with published maps of roads and footpaths. Their routes are tunnels through allotments and rows of garden, through steep-hanging ruined gardens above the docks, in and out of timber yards and upriver to the restaurant bins of the city centre, back to safe suburban gardens where the covers may have been left off the rabbit hutch, where the fat pedigree guinea-pig shivers in his straw-packed corner and smells fox.\n\nShe's almost home. Past the stained-glass lights of the Prince and Pauper, past the clang of the bin-lids where Clara shovels in uneaten bolognese, past the bakery where blue fluorescent lights will be humming again at four a.m., past the corner of the graveyard and through the alley, dark and slender with its one Victorian lamp-post shedding a pale ring at the blind corner. The blind bend in the alley where someone could hide. It's empty. Safe again. The square. Home.\n\nThe stairs are dark.\n\n'Nadine! Nadine! Is that you, dear?' Enid's voice, nerveless and commanding. 'Come on up, dear.'\n\nAs Nadine climbs the last stairs to Enid's attic, the door opens just a crack, enough for Enid to peep round and wrinkle up in welcome. She opens the door a little wider and Nadine slides in.\n\n'You ought to get a bolt fitted,' says Nadine. 'Then no one could get in.' There is no lock on Enid's door.\n\n'No one has ever troubled me,' says Enid, looking at Nadine with sudden severity. 'Never trouble till trouble troubles you. Those squatters were perfectly nice young people. Once they realized that this room was my home, they didn't try to come in. They respected my privacy.'\n\n'I didn't know there'd been squatters here.'\n\n'Well, there weren't, not once your Kai and Tony had bought the place. They were gone as if the hag was after them. Why that should be, I can't imagine, seeing that your Kai and Tony are both so nicely spoken.' And she gives Nadine a sharp look.\n\n'Did you know them?'\n\n'Well, you get to know people, don't you, dear? Not like I know _you,_ of course. There was Jenny, a very nice young person but taken up with the baby. Still, that's only natural, isn't it?'\n\n'If she had a baby, I suppose she could've got on to a housing list.'\n\n'Oh, yes, very likely she could. So that's all right, then, isn't it? I expect they found her a council flat,' adds Enid satirically.\n\nEnid's small fire burns in the grate, making the room stiflingly hot. The windows are closed. A big bunch of buddleia droops on a table, overpoweringly sweet at first, then half forgotten like an infusion in the air. Enid painted the room herself two years ago, in brilliant Monet blue and pink, lavishly streaking the walls and ceiling. The paint is too heavy for the wallpaper and it has begun to peel away from the plaster. Enid does not believe in wasting money at launderettes, so she washes her sheets in the bath and hangs them perilously out of the window, where they leave long runnels in the grime. A small clothes-line dips above the fireplace, where two or three pairs of woolly knickers and vests hang, stiff as card. Just now the floor is covered with rushes. Enid was taken on a river trip two weeks ago. While consuming tea and scones at the riverside tea gardens, she spotted a bank of rushes, and, after begging a sharp knife from the proprietor, she cut herself pretty near a bin-bag full, saying that it was for church decoration. She brought them home and strewed them on her floor. 'As they did in medieval times, years ago, dear, to keep the air pure. It stopped the plague. And we shall be having the plague again, if they don't do something about the sewers round here. They're crumbling away inside, you know. And the things people put down them these days. Nappies and I don't know what. One of these days there'll be a collapse and a bus will go down into the sewers and then something will be done, once it's too late. The greatest gift of our ancestors thrown away by foolish neglect. Sanitation, dear.'\n\nThe rushes lie limp in the extreme heat, streaked with yellow. They smell unpleasantly.\n\n'If you open the window, they'll dry out properly,' remarks Nadine.\n\n'Oh, no, dear, I can't have all that dirty air in here. I can taste the fumes right down in my throat. By rights we should all leave the city in summer, but what can you do? Perhaps you could go and visit your family, Nadine?' Enid's small face peers inquisitively from behind the line of knickers. This is not the first time she has set out to discover a little more about Nadine. 'It's nice to know a little bit of background, isn't it, dear?' And why not, thinks Nadine. All these secrets. I'm getting as bad as Kai. Enid's so out of the world, who would she tell?\n\n'It's too far,' she says. 'I can't afford the fare.'\n\n'Surely _Kai_ could give you something? He's always going here, there and everywhere himself. Money doesn't seem to be much of a problem.'\n\n'My parents live a long way away. In Germany.'\n\n'In Germany! Well, that does come as a surprise to me. I should never have taken you for a German, with your beautiful English.'\n\nNadine laughs. 'I'm not German, nor are they. They moved to south Germany. They're living in an Esseler Home there.'\n\n'I seem to know the name. Very German \u2013 some sort of philanthropist, wasn't he? Of course they have a lot of those over there. Are they quite _old_ parents, dear?'\n\n'The home is for my sister. She has cerebral palsy \u2013 you know what that is? The home runs a programme for people with cerebral palsy. My mother works in the kitchen, and my father works in the office and on the farm, and so that pays for Lulu's keep there.'\n\n'That sounds rather hard work for them, I must say,' says Enid, all her sympathies at once engaged by the thought of two elderly people doing heavy manual labour. It's refreshing, thinks Nadine, to find someone who doesn't immediately start to question and sympathize about Lulu.\n\n'They're quite young, really. Early forties. They do get time off, and there's plenty for them there as well. Singing and meditation groups and so on. I had a postcard from them showing the place. It's above a lake and there are apple orchards all round. _The work is tough, but this place is wonderful for Lulu, and that's what counts. It's her turn now,'_ quotes Nadine expressionlessly. 'That's what they put on the postcard. That's about all I know about it. They did send me some brochures and things.'\n\nThe little black kettle over the fire lets out a quavering warble and a puff of steam.\n\n'There now! She's singing already!' exclaims Enid delightedly. 'Now we can have a nice cup of tea, and you can tell me what _your_ turn was.'\n\n'My turn? Oh, being clever was my turn. Being able to do things. Passing exams. Going to university and having chances nobody else had had, that was going to be my turn.'\n\n'So what happened? I mean, this is a very interesting house and I'm sure you're learning a lot here that you couldn't learn at the university, but it's not quite the same thing, is it, dear? Bugger these rushes. Nearly had me down then.'\n\n'I don't know. I'd have a book in front of me and I'd be reading it but I couldn't understand what it was saying, not even the words. They weren't like words any more, just like black things I had to put in the right place. Only I couldn't. The words weren't like words any more. They felt so heavy, I couldn't get through them. Once I read one page and then I realised I'd put a tape on at the beginning and it had finished. And I hadn't made sense of a word. It wasn't even a difficult book. It was just a page of a novel. I got frightened.'\n\n'And then you met Kai.'\n\n'No, I knew him already. I met him when I was doing GCSEs \u2013' She stops. Enid registers the slip, but instead of commenting or questioning further, she goes off at a tangent. Thank God, thinks Nadine, old people's minds don't stay long on one thing.\n\n'I often wonder about this business of turns, if you like to put it that way. One day, when I was in Manchester, not long before the war it was, in 1937 \u2013'\n\n'Were you living there?'\n\n'Not exactly. I was a business girl, living in Warrington at that time. But I'd seen a little of the world by then, even though I _was_ only twenty.' She shoots Nadine the small coy glance of a woman who is lying about her age. Twenty in 1937, calculates Nadine rapidly, even that would make her about seventy-seven now. Can she be older than that? She'd have to be nearly eighty.\n\n'Oh, yes, I've moved around a bit in my lifetime. But I'm staying put now,' Enid adds quickly, remembering that Nadine is not just any young girl, but one who lives with the landlord, and that the landlord would like to be rid of his sitting tenant. 'I don't believe you'd be able to guess where I came from originally, now would you? No, I thought not, dear. Well, I had come up to Manchester after an opening, very promising it sounded, I had to meet a Mr Albion at the Exchange Hotel. I thought it was a funny name even at the time, but then people do have funny names, don't they \u2013 like your Kai. I can't say his surname to save my life.'\n\n'I expect it's perfectly ordinary in Finland, like Smith or Roberts.'\n\n'I daresay it is to them. But not to _us,_ is it, dear? Now where was I? So I waited for nearly three quarters of an hour in the hotel lobby and Mr Albion never turned up, and I could see the hotel staff were starting to look at me sideways \u2013 very suspicious they were in those days if you didn't have a man with you, you've no idea \u2013 so I went up to the desk and said very \u00e0 la posh, \"If a Mr Albion asks for me, tell him I was unable to wait,\" and out I swept into the street before they could say anything \u2013 there was a _very_ saucy-looking boy by the lift.'\n\n'So didn't you ever meet Mr Albion?'\n\n'Oh, Mr Albion was nothing, he doesn't really come into the story at all, he was just the occasion of it, so to speak. Oh, no, I was delighted never to hear one word from _Mr Albion_ again. An alias, you may be sure of it. But I wasn't going to go straight back home to Warrington with my tail between my legs. What a waste of the fare that would have been. It was only midday, and I thought I would go and look round the shops, and then have my tea. But when I went down the steps it was pouring with rain. You don't know Manchester rain, not as it used to be. It would leave black streaks down your clothes \u2013 you _never_ wore white or cream when you went to Manchester. I was wearing a very nice costume, navy-blue, my best for the interview. I had my umbrella with me \u2013 you always did in Manchester \u2013 but I knew that I should be soaked through in no time even so, with the rain coming down the way it was. So I set off walking, thinking I would get something to eat in a tea-shop. Then it began to tip down just as if someone had emptied a bucket over me, and water was running down the street so I could see my best shoes would be ruined in a minute. I'd have taken them off and walked down the street barefoot only it wasn't respectable. I had to take shelter. I saw a shop entrance, so I hopped up a step and stood against the glass. It was a jeweller's shop. There were two or three of us waiting \u2013 everyone had scuttled off the pavements and the rain was still bouncing up and hitting my face even in the shelter of the shop doorway. Then I heard a voice say, \"Come in a little farther, you're getting wet,\" so I did, even though it meant I was pushed right up against the lady who had spoken. It was a voice you'd notice, even in the midst of a rainstorm. Low and clear; what we used to call well modulated, though that's not an expression you hear these days. And the voice sounded as if the person speaking was smiling. I noticed the voice more than I noticed her, just at first; we were all crushed up together, and I could smell lilacs. We said one or two things, I can't remember what, about the rain, I expect. There was a car which went past slowly with a wave of water parting at the wheels, and I said it reminded me of the Red Sea. I always liked that story, from a child: the thought of the sea parting, and the floor of it bare. I used to wonder what happened to the fish. Were they swept up in the wave, or did they lie there floundering? She laughed \u2013 she had a lovely deep laugh, it went with her voice, and said she wished we were Israelites.\n\n'The rain didn't stop and didn't stop. There was a cab coming \u2013 the rain made it look quite white for a minute. She looked at me and she said, \"I'm going to get that cab. Can I drop you?\" and I said, stupidly, \"I don't really know where I'm going,\" so she laughed again and said, \"Then you'd better come with me. I can take you somewhere out of the rain.\" She leaned out and signalled to the cab \u2013 it saw us and turned in towards the kerb. But I wasn't sure if I ought to go with her. You heard lots of stories in those days \u2013 white slave traffic and women in taxis with syringes. She must have seen it, for she said, \"It's all right. It's a Ladies' Club.\" You couldn't look her straight in the face and think she was white slave traffic, so we both got in the cab. She pulled off her hat and shook her hair out \u2013 it was wet at the ends, like mine. She seemed very worldly and sophisticated to me, so I thought she must be quite old; I knew later that she was just thirty. I liked the way she signalled to the cab, and it came wheeling round, and the way she told the driver where to take us. Then she leaned back against the leather seat and said, _\"That's all right._ We're out of the rain. Oh, this Manchester rain! Can you believe it? It's like some awful film.\" She hadn't a Manchester voice, but then I hadn't a Warrington one, or no more than a touch. I was looking at my shoes. \"Suede, aren't they?\" she said. \"Don't worry, they won't spoil. We'll get them seen to.\"\n\n'It wasn't very far, then the cab stopped in front of a little entrance, so close we had just a step to the door. She paid the cab. I had a shilling in my hand, though it was meant for my dinner, but she wouldn't take my money. It looked a dull place, and I was a bit disappointed. I'd thought it would be somewhere special. There was just a small door with a brass handle and a little plaque beside it: the millicent sowerby association for ladies. \"Dreadful, isn't it?\" she said as we went in. \"No one calls it that, of course. We call it the Manchester Ladies.\" I didn't think that sounded much better, to give it a name like a public convenience. But in we went. The entrance was narrow and brown and old, the way these buildings are, then it suddenly swelled out into a big entrance hall, one of those geometric shapes with six sides, you know? There was a plain green carpet, and big seats to wait in, but \"We'll go straight in,\" she said and pushed a big swinging door \u2013 doors led off the hall in all directions, and there we were.'\n\n'Where were you?' asked Nadine, sipping tea.\n\n'I couldn't quite take it in at first. It was a big silvery room, as if sunlight was coming in from somewhere. That was the mirrors. They ran from ceiling to floor on one side of the room, so that everything shone back on itself and you couldn't tell how big the room was or how many people were in it. There was a fire with big clean-looking flames leaping up in the grate. Then there were plants, nearly as big as outdoor trees, growing right up the walls. They had an orange tree in a tub, I remember, with little oranges growing on it. You could smell the oranges. It had white waxy flowers as well as the fruit. How I wanted to pick one of those oranges! I'd never seen such a thing growing before. There was a dark blue and rose carpet, like an oriental carpet. And all round the room _chaises-longues_ and women lying on them. Two were playing cards: there were three white five-pound notes crumpled on the floor between them. There was a woman in a kimono writing in a notebook; she looked up when we came in, as if she'd been thinking of something and we'd interrupted her. I thought perhaps she was a writer. She was my idea of what a writer ought to look like. She went out by another door. And there was a red-haired woman stroking a cat \u2013 stroke, stroke, stroke. I can see her now. That was Caro. It made me shiver to watch her. She looked up and saw us and said, \"Darling! Who's your friend?\" \"My name is Enid Shelton,\" I said quickly, not wanting the lady I came with to let on that we didn't even so much as know each other's names.\n\n'But I could see the red-haired woman wasn't really interested in my name. She put the cat down and came over to us. She touched my lady's shoulder, and then her hair. \"Sukey, you're wet through. Come and take your things off.\"\n\n'We went into another room \u2013 this time it was quite plain, with wooden panelling and a couple of beds, and a big carved wardrobe with more kimonos hanging there. Sukey took one and held it against me. \"Yes \u2013 that suits you. Would you like a bath?\"\n\n'A kimono was quite enough. I certainly didn't want a bath. But Sukey did. She held out her foot so we could see the mud spots on her stockings. Beautiful stockings they were: silk. We didn't have nylons then \u2013 it was silk or cotton, and mine were cotton. Nylons came in the war, with the Americans. They gave us nylons.\n\n'\"I'll scrub your back,\" said the red-haired one. Sukey just nodded. But she hadn't forgotten about me, as I thought she might once her friend started fussing over her. \"But will you be all right, Enid?\" she asked me. \"You ought to sit near the fire and get warm. Find a novel from the shelves. I shan't be long.\"\n\n'I felt shy going back into the big room with all the mirrors, in case anyone asked me what I was doing there. But then the two who were playing cards stopped their game and talked to me. They weren't like Caro \u2013 they were quite friendly. They even seemed interested in me. I told them about Mr Albion and how I had met Sukey. I wanted to ask more about the club \u2013 whether it was just for professional women or might anybody join? They looked clever, as if they might have been doctors, or teachers. \"Oh, no,\" they answered, \"Nothing like that.\" \"It's just a private club for women, that's all.\" \"No restrictions.\" \"Certainly no black-balls or waiting-lists.\" \"It's not exclusive in any way.\" I looked round at the orange tree and the pile of new novels and the five-pound notes thrown on the floor, as if they were rubbish. They saw me looking. \"Only it's a little tricky to find.\" \"We don't advertise, naturally.\" \"Members bring then guests along, and then _they_ become members.\" \"The entrance puts people off.\" \"So shabby \u2013 it's deplorable, really, isn't it, Paula?\" \"And the name too. Poor Millicent Sowerby.\" \"Shocking. But now you h _ave_ found us...;\" \"People usually do...; \"You'll come again.\" \"Of course she will.\" \"Won't she?\"\n\n'They ordered tea, and we were just drinking it when Caro and Sukey came back in. Caro was very flushed, from the steam I supposed. Sukey looked younger in the kimono than she had in her black coat and skirt. Her hair was damp and it was curling round her forehead. She dropped to the floor and tucked the kimono round her ankles. I wondered if that was how Japanese ladies sat \u2013 it looked very graceful.\n\n'\"Whisky,\" she said. There was a sideboard with bottles on it. Caro got up and poured a stream of very pale whisky into a big heavy glass. It didn't look at all like the treacly stuff I'd seen in bars. \"Heaven,\" said Sukey, drinking quite half of it. \"What a haven this is.\" \"Heaven-haven,\" said Paula. \"Out of the swing of the sea,\" said April. \"Except that we aren't nuns,\" said Caro. \"Oh, why not? To stretch a point,\" said Sukey lazily, drinking off the rest of her whisky. \"More heaven, please.\" \"Will you have some, Enid?\" Caro asked me. \"No, she won't. She wouldn't like it. But she'll have a little brandy to keep out the cold, won't you, Enid?\"\n\n'So I did. I thought I shouldn't like it, but I loved it \u2013 first the taste of it puckering up my mouth, and then the heat of it fanning out right through me till the last of the rain and Mr Albion disappeared. But I could tell Caro was annoyed. She wanted to be alone with Sukey, anyone could see that, but Sukey didn't want to be alone with her. Then Sukey took a little comb from the kimono pocket; tortoiseshell, very expensive; and said, \"I'll comb your hair for you, Enid. If you take it down it'll dry in front of the fire.\" For I still had my hair long then. Father wouldn't let us cut it when we were at home, and then I was told it was my best feature, though you wouldn't think it now.'\n\nNadine looks at Enid's sparse tufts of white-grey hair. Artfully deployed as they are, they scarcely cover her skull.\n\n'It was down to my waist when I unpinned it. Nut-brown, they called the colour, like the nut-brown maid. That was what Father said when he got sentimental. I always washed it and brushed it and took care of it, so I wasn't ashamed when Sukey unpinned it and the whole lot fell down my back. \"What slippery stuff!\" she said. \"And such quantities of it. I wonder why we ever cut our hair?\" \"Because we prefer it short,\" said Caro, who had her red hair beautifully shaped and no longer than a boy's. Now I come to think of it, Caro's hair looked a bit like yours, Nadine, apart from the colour. It suited her, but I could see Sukey had it in for her. \"Enid's doesn't feel like hair at all,\" Sukey said. \"It's like putting your hand under the tap. Soft water. It's marvellous, you ought to feel it,\" and of course I was pleased. \"Put your head in my lap,\" she said. \"And I'll comb your hair for you.\"\n\n'Caro made a sharp movement, as if she was going to say something or do something, but Sukey smiled at her and she said nothing. I put my head in Sukey's lap. I could feel the warmth of her body through the kimono. She spread out my hair over her kimono and began to comb it in long sweeps from the crown to the ends. I shut my eyes. I felt as if Sukey was my mother, and I was long ago at home, being looked after. Except that my mother never did anything like that for us \u2013 she had no time. I could hear the fire bubbling, and the long hiss of the comb through my hair. Nobody said anything. It made me feel happy, but sad too, as if I would cry if she went on combing and combing. \"There,\" said Sukey. \"Perfect.\" I lifted my head from her lap and sat up without opening my eyes. She twisted my hair up and put in the pins. My hair was so fine that it never went up easily, but when I looked in the mirror Sukey'd got it just right, waving a little round my forehead, with a heavy knob shining at the back of my neck.\n\n'April was smoothing one of the five-pound notes between her fingers. \"I promise to pay the bearer on demand...;\" she said dreamily. \"Do you think they would still give you gold for it?\" \"Why not try? Then you could bite off bits to pay for your dinners.\" \"And where do you work, Enid,\" asked Caro. \"In one of the mills?\" \"Don't be more of a bloody fool than you can help, Caro,\" Sukey said to her. \"Enid is training to be a surgeon.\" April's face glowed. \"Really? How splendid! Was there much opposition? Do you find there is still a great deal of prejudice against women in the medical schools?\" \"Now, April, remember, this is our haven. Enid has enough to do with training for a difficult career and battling against constant discouragement. Of course there's opposition: there always is. Now she needs to relax. That's why I brought her here. You have a lecture at three, haven't you, Enid? I shall put you into a cab.\" \"Oh, yes, you mustn't be late for a lecture. You mustn't give them any excuse to call women students unreliable. What's the subject?\" \"Anatomy today, isn't it, Enid?\" asked Sukey. Caro was crisping the five-pound notes between her fingers. She looked as if she would like to tear them up. I murmured something, hoping to God Sukey wouldn't say anything more. It didn't matter to her \u2013 she wasn't the one who was going to look a fool if anyone asked questions. I still don't know why she had to lie like that. It came out later that I wasn't a medical student, but Sukey made it all right. She made it seem as if I was very clever and had always wanted to be one, but it was too expensive. So April was more sympathetic than ever. But that was later. Sukey quite often told lies.\n\n'It was half past two and I knew Sukey wanted me to go. I went into the wood-smelling bedroom and changed back into my clothes. My suede shoes had been brushed and shoe trees had been put into them to keep them in shape. That must have been Sukey.\n\n'She was waiting outside. Paula and April and Caro nodded and waved. They didn't say goodbye formally \u2013 they seemed to think I'd be coming again. It was one of those places where people went in and out and melted into whatever was happening. But I wondered. If Sukey had meant me to come again, why had she said I was training to be a surgeon? I could never keep up the pretence. Or perhaps I could. Perhaps it was just a game and I could play it too. Why should everything be serious all the time? That delicious sound in Sukey's voice changed everything \u2013 even lying seemed like a game. I looked at all the other doors off the entrance hall, the ones Sukey hadn't opened. I wondered where they went. More rooms with women sitting reading and playing cards? Dining-rooms, perhaps? Libraries? It was silent but it was a warm humming silence. A private silence, not a library hush. Perhaps there were bedrooms behind the doors. Sukey had her arm around my waist. She drew me to the narrow brown club entrance.\n\n'\"Here we are. Yes, your cab's outside waiting. Don't worry about paying him \u2013 it's on my account. Now, darling, let me look at you. Perfect. And the shoes? Did they mark?\" I held out my foot to show her the unstained suede. \"Lovely. Now off you go. Till next time, darling \u2013 remember, Manchester Ladies.\"\n\n'She drew me closer, put her hands on the sides of my face and kissed me, two kisses, one on each cheek. Her irises were striped when you got close to them, grey and black. Then she moved back and they began to sparkle. She gave a little wave and turned away before I did, to cross the green carpet while I went down the narrow strip of brown lino to the street and the cab. And that was that.'\n\n## _Twelve_\n\nThe story's over. The pink-skulled storyteller sips her cool tea as Sukey and Caro and the Manchester Ladies recede, folding in on themselves until they are no more than pinpoints in Enid's eyes. Like Japanese paper flowers dropped into water they have expanded and taken on flesh and colour. Drained, they are nothing but a smear on glass. _That was that._\n\n'No, I'm sure it wasn't,' says Nadine. 'There's much more, isn't there? I can tell.'\n\n'How do you mean?'\n\n'Something else happened afterwards. Something important, to do with Sukey and Caro and the others.'\n\n'I told you I met them again, didn't I, dear? But I'll tell you the rest of the story another time,' says Enid, smiling over her teacup, her voice cosy and pacifying.\n\n'I wish you'd go on with it now. I'm dying to know what happened to them. The Manchester Ladies. It _is_ all true, isn't it? It really happened?'\n\n'Of course it did! Why would I want to make up a thing like that?'\n\n'It sounds quite bizarre, a place like that behind a door in an ordinary street in Manchester.'\n\n'What about this place?' responds Enid sharply. 'I daresay people'ud be a bit surprised if they knew what went on behind _our_ front door.'\n\nNadine is silenced. Satisfied, Enid goes on. 'I only wish you could have felt that carpet. You don't get anything like it these days. You'd think you could spread out your arms and swim away on it. It was like moss to walk on, though I don't suppose that means much to you city girls. And quiet \u2013 it soaked up all the sound. Oh, yes, I saw Sukey again. And Caro.'\n\nThe room is very quiet. Enid's head is framed by the semicircle of hand-painted plates on the wall. She has painted them herself, splodging fat-petalled scarlet daisies on to cheap white plates, binding the flowers into a pattern with trails of woodbine.\n\n'Nobody could help seeing Caro,' says Enid. 'Even if they didn't know her. There were pictures of her all over the newspapers. She didn't do herself justice in the photographs. But then I suppose it was the circumstances. No one could look her best. And then in black and white you lost her colouring. I don't care for red hair myself, but she was very striking. Red hair, white skin. Not green eyes, though. They were brown, golden brown. And she would stare straight at you and never look away. It was as if there was no one behind her eyes. I can still hear the newsboys calling out her name. They'd got it scrawled in black across the front of all the news-stands.' The teacup is arrested in the air. Enid's eyes narrow. Nadine whispers so as not to break the spell again. 'Why? What did she do?'\n\nEnid leans forward. Her small fierce fingers grasp Nadine's wrist, and she pulls Nadine towards her. Nadine's never been so close to Enid before. Her face dissolves into a crazed map of wrinkles, brown splodges, patches of skin incongruously milky as pearls.\n\n'What colour do you think grass is?' she whispers.\n\n'Why \u2013 green, of course,' says Nadine, annoyed. What's Enid playing at now? Can't she just tell the story through from beginning to end?\n\n'No!' says Enid, her dry fingers gripping tighter. 'No, not if you look at it. It isn't at all. If only I could make you see her.'\n\n'Who, Caro?'\n\n'No. Sukey.' Enid pauses, sighs, says again, 'Sukey,' with slow, caressing love. 'That's how I know grass isn't always green. 'Course I was a town girl then. She was coming across the field towards me and all the grass was moving. It was a hill farm, high up, so there was always a wind. Not yet eight o'clock in the morning. All the shadows lying sideways, and the dew dried already, for it was June. The grass was purple and grey and brown and silver, all moving. None of it was green. And the grass shivered against her as she walked. There was Yorkshire fog and cocks-foot and fescue. It lapped up her legs and her skirts. Skirts were longer then. She was smiling at me. I could see her smile from a long way off, from the other side of the field, long before I could really see her face. She moved lightly and held herself very upright \u2013 Sukey always did. The wind made lines in the grass so it seemed to bow down and rise up around her.'\n\nNadine sees it: the pelt of grass, purple and silver-tipped, dipping under the stroke of Sukey's skirts.\n\n'Then I saw Caro,' continues Enid. 'She was over in the far corner of the field, by the gate. The grass seemed to knot itself round her legs: she couldn't make her way through. She looked as if she was trying to run in a nightmare. She couldn't get to Sukey. And her mouth was open, wide open like a hole in her face. I watched her crawling over the field. She was like a red stain in the grass.'\n\nEnid looks down. She is rocking herself very slightly, side to side.\n\n'Don't get upset,' says Nadine. 'It's a long time ago. It's over now. I shouldn't have asked you to tell me.'\n\n'Like blood,' says Enid. 'She looked like blood.'\n\n'Don't think about it any more \u2013 I'll make us another cup of tea \u2013'\n\n'It isn't over, it's never over,' whispers Enid. But below them the big house booms like Jack's castle in the clouds when the giant comes home. The clouds crowd together, bruising one another, while the beanstalk leading into the sky begins to shake. The front door slams, the hall echoes, feet strike the bottom step \u2013\n\n'It's your Kai. Quick. You don't want him finding you up here.'\n\nNadine leaps up, slips on the rushes, grabs at the mantelpiece, misses, catches her temple on its black corner. For a sick second her head swims, the gas hisses in her ears, the line of knickers lurches towards her. Then Enid's got her and is steering her back to the chair.\n\n'She needs a glass of water \u2013 now where's the bugger\u2013' Then there's a chink of glass and a mineral smell of cold water under her nose. She breathes in, sips, eyes closed. She breathes in the dry nannying smell of Enid. But that banging and pounding is not just in her head any more. It's footsteps. She opens her eyes and sees Enid frozen, suspended, one foot on the rushes, listening to the rising clomp of Kai's footsteps, knowing now that she'll never get Nadine out of the way in time.\n\n'Don't let him come in here,' she pleads, seizing Nadine's arm with her knuckly little hands as if Nadine carries magic with her to baffle Kai into seeing a fence of blossoming thorns where the door once was.\n\n'Nadine! Nadine!'\n\nUp and up, winding the starlit stair to the attic. He's close. He's just outside on the landing. The two women can almost hear his breathing. His footsteps stop. 'Nadine!' he bellows. Now he's bound to come in. Nadine might as well answer him. She opens her mouth.\n\n'She's just coming,' screeches Enid, but it's too late. The knob turns, the door opens and there is Kai, tired and rumpled, a big green and gilt carrier-bag in his hand.\n\n'What are you doing up here? I thought something had happened.'\n\n'She only banged her head getting up, that's all it was,' says Enid, waving a damp wodge of cotton wool in the direction of Nadine's head. Nadine feels Kai's hands take the two sides of her temples. His hands aren't tender but they are firm and warm. They hold her so she can close her eyes and feel the pain go.\n\n'You poor kid,' he says. His big warm body shuts out Enid. 'It's OK. Do you feel sick? Can you see OK?'\n\nShe nods, holding back tears.\n\n'You poor kid,' he says again. 'How did it happen?'\n\n'Hit my head on the shelf. I slipped.'\n\n'It gave her a shock when she heard you calling,' says Enid.\n\n'You mean this crap made you slip?' says Kai, stirring the rushes with the point of his shoe. A faint smell of decay rises where he bruises them. 'What's it doing on the floor?'\n\n'Rushes,' mumbles Nadine. Talking makes her head hurt.\n\n'It keeps the air pure,' says Enid.\n\n'Jesus,' says Kai. 'Jesus. Come on, Nadine, let's get you downstairs.'\n\nHe won't talk to Enid. His eyes avoid her as he looks round her room with its piggled washing, its heaps of bedclothes and newspapers, its bunches of herbs drying from the ceiling, blodges of paint and spread-out jigsaw skies. He breathes in the smell, of rushes, damp washing and old flesh. 'Get it cleaned up,' he says. He puts his arm round Nadine. They are two and Enid is one. Enid is small and wispy and worthless in her dirty nest. She's worse than a bird. Even a rickety old jackdaw won't foul its own nest. She'll be bringing vermin into the house next.\n\n'Besides, it's a fire risk,' menaces Kai casually, as he steers Nadine towards the door. She goes with him, saying nothing. Her head hurts. She'd like to cry. It's the shock, she needs support. _You poor kid,_ she says to herself, tasting the words. It's OK not to say anything to Enid. She's going to let herself go, leave the room and the story and let Kai take care of her.\n\nNadine yields. They walk down the stairs slowly, side by side, through the quiet blue darkness of the stairwell, with a cool breeze blowing through the open landing windows. The house is a ship again, creaking as the wind fills its sails and it tugs hard at its ropes, turned to the open sea, ready to leave behind the complications of land. Only now does Nadine realize how hot it was in Enid's room, how stuffy, claustrophobic even. And surely there was something odd about Enid's story. The Manchester Ladies. There was probably a grain of truth in it, but Enid must have made up the rest. It was just like a fairy story. Of course she makes up stories because she's lonely. Old people look back to the past. Enid's so proud of her memories. There's nothing magical about her. Only when you're with her, listening, the story floats like egg-white in water, transparent at first, then solid, white, whirling you round in its circle.\n\n_You need your memories when you get to my age._\n\nYes, Enid needs them; but I don't. I've got other things.\n\nThe carrier-bag crackles expensively as it bumps against Kai's leg.\n\n'What have you got there?' asks Nadine.\n\n'Don't talk, you'll make yourself dizzy. Wait until we're downstairs.'\n\nShe wishes they could be forever descending the stairs together, touching the walls lightly, putting one foot down on the next wide shallow tread, then the other, then a pause, and again down. Nadine would never tire of it. Their heels sound soft and firm in the silence of the house. Down they go, down and down, half-circle by half-circle, fitted to one another, side against side, breath matched to breath, the breeze gently flattening their clothes against them. They are two and they are one. This is like the old days, before they came to this house, when she used to meet Kai in places which belonged to neither of them. They met in parks, in underpasses, in restaurants, in other people's flats, in country pubs where they left together to surge down country lanes in Kai's old van. The verges were white with cow-parsley, heavy with the weight of new leaves, insects, sap, nests. All the weight of summer. The old days when they were always just on the point of leaving for somewhere else. When she was glad to feel that Kai's silences held something that he knew and she did not. When it was such a simple matter for Kai to say goodbye and go, and leave her in his bare little flat where the telephone was always ringing. She didn't wonder where he'd gone, or how long it would be before he came back. She was unsuspicious. You can't get it back once it's gone, that stupor of trust.\n\n*\n\nIn their room Kai switches on the light. The green and gold carrier-bag spills pale tissue on to their bed, and he guides Nadine's hand into the folds. Surprise. Don't look. See if you can guess what it is. The material feels like skin. She knows that touch: washed silk. The dress is creamy white, not pure white, and sleeveless, with a plain round neckline, short, shaped to skim breasts and waist and hips.\n\n'Put it on,' says Kai.\n\nNadine peels off her top and leggings and kicks them into a heap. She lifts up her arms and the cool heavy silk slithers into place. She moves and the dress moves with her, caressing shoulders and thighs, coming close, swinging out. Her arms and legs feel as if the silk has polished them. Kai looks.\n\n'You need tights. Those fine lycra tights. Or if you tan your legs more...;'\n\n'I could try a sunbed. Maybe there's one at the sauna. Vicki said \u2013'\n\nHe tenses. His eyes flick from the dress to Nadine's face.\n\n'Vicki? How do you know Vicki?'\n\n'She called round this morning. She left you a message. It's downstairs somewhere. I wonder whether you can wash this, or does it have to be dry-cleaned? White's awkward...;'\n\nHe puffs out his lips impatiently. 'Don't fuss about that. Do you think I can't afford dry-cleaners? What did she say \u2013 Vicki?'\n\n'Nothing, really. I just thought of her because her tan looked like a sunbed tan. I could ask her,' says Nadine, looking straight at him. _Don't make me know things, and I won't ask about them._\n\n'I don't want you treating your skin like Vicki does. She's going to have a neck like a tortoise in a couple of years. Florida's full of women like that. Look at her skin when you see her.' He reaches out, traces the fine knob of bone on Nadine's wrist.\n\n'We're going to go for a sauna. And I'm going to meet a friend of hers \u2013 someone called Lila.'\n\n'My God, well, make it a short sauna. Lila'd bore the pants off anyone. Gab gab gab about her kid all the time.'\n\n'Oh, it's only a sauna,' says Nadine lightly. His right hand is playing with the winder of his watch. Fiddle, fiddle, fiddle. 'I might not bother,' she says, walking around the room for the pleasure of feeling the dress move against her legs and breasts. He smiles, stops fiddling. So he didn't want her to meet Vicki. No need to think about that now.\n\n'With a dress like that you need jewellery to set it off,' says Kai.\n\n'A serious dress,' mocks Nadine.\n\n'Plain gold. Nothing flashy. Though you can almost get away without anything. Turn around.'\n\nNadine turns like a statue on a plinth. At this moment she knows she's beautiful. Her beauty burns into Kai and leaves him weaker than she is. For once. She looks at him. He laughs at the sight of her, his mouth half open as if he's in pain. The way animals look when we say they're laughing.\n\n'Do you like it?' asks Nadine.\n\nHe doesn't touch her. She has the power now. If she lifted her finger...;\n\n'Do you like it?' she asks again.\n\n'You look \u2013' he says, and the moment breaks. His attention snaps away from her, to the door. He's heard something.\n\n'There's Tony,' he says. He goes to the door and calls down, 'Tony! Hey! Come up here!'\n\nAnd there's Tony coming up the steps lightly, so much more lightly than Kai, and the sound of footsteps isn't frightening at all now that she's in her own room, not Enid's, dressed in the silk dress Kai has bought for her. Tony stands in the doorway, his eyes quick and sharp, going over her. This is how he likes a woman to look.\n\n'She needs something with it,' he says finally. 'A necklace, and maybe a bracelet? Something heavy, you know? And different earrings.'\n\n'Yeah, but it's fantastic, isn't it?' urges Kai.\n\n'It's really classy. I always thought you had class, Nadine, but you don't make the best of yourself. It's the haircut does it as well. You could be anyone.'\n\nShe could go anywhere. She could be anyone. The dress slides over her body as intimately as a pair of hands. It's alive with changing light and it takes its curves from her breasts and hips. But it's subtle. It plays at making her unavailable and then she moves and there's a ghost of a chance.\n\n'And shoes,' says Kai, considering the dress again.\n\n'Yes. Nothing fancy. Her feet are a bit big, but in a classic style no one'll notice. Princess Di's got big feet.'\n\nThe two men look at one another. There's a charge in the air, but it's not the same charge as there was between her and Kai before Tony came in. She was in control then. She was making him feel things.\n\n'Yeah,' says Kai. 'She could go anywhere like that. She's got style. I should've seen it before.'\n\nNadine wants to strip off the dress and put on the old leggings and singlet top she wears for juggling. Neither Kai nor Tony can juggle. But she also wants to wear the dress. She wants to find out more about what it does to her, and what she can do in it. It turns her into someone else entirely. She feels it herself, in the dress that is white but not too white, so that its folds hold a suggestion of candleglow, the dress that is short and sexy but also virginal, the dress that reveals the shape of her flesh for a moment at a time, so that each time it's as if they've never been seen before. It must have cost a lot of money. No two human beings could have sharper noses for the presence of money than Kai and Tony. It not only costs money, it suggests money. It suggests that Nadine herself is a polished container into which money has spilt all her life until it overflows and leaks out through her pores.\n\nAll this time she's been wearing jeans and leggings and sleeveless cotton dresses and they've never picked up the scent of money and style. Kai must have had some idea, or else why would he ever have bought the dress for her? Unless it was part of a deal. This immaculate thing might have come straight from a beaten-up warehouse, like the wine. But it fits. It fits perfectly. To put it on is to walk straight into another life and find that she's at home there. She's been given the code which opens security gates and gets you past doormen at clubs and parties. The guards are to look after her, not to keep her out. Nadine sits down on the bed. The dress makes her sit in a quite different way from usual, with her legs pressed lightly together and poised to one side. Kai and Tony smile.\n\n'That old bitch up there in the attic, and Nadine here,' says Kai. 'What were you doing up there?'\n\nShe shakes her head. 'Nothing.'\n\n'She's made for money,' says Tony. 'It's a crime she hasn't got any.'\n\n'She's got everything she wants,' says Kai, and turns to Nadine. 'Haven't you?'\n\n'No,' she says. 'I'm hungry. Bugger off, Tony. I'm going to get changed, then I'll cook us something.'\n\nLater, as they lie tangled together, Kai rocks her gently.\n\n'My baby. My baby. Go to sleep. My lovely one. My baby.' His hands cradle her skull, his fingers run through her feathery hair and touch her temples, smoothing lightly over the bruise which is forming there. 'How's your head now?'\n\n'Fine,' she mumbles, 'I'm fine.'\n\n'You must take care of yourself,' he lulls her, and his arms tighten. 'My baby, my lovely one.'\n\nDrunk, Nadine closes her eyes. His endearments pour over her like oil, soothing, healing, melting into her ears while she feigns sleep.\n\n## _Thirteen_\n\nThe InterCity diesel glides past the photograph booth, past buckets of plastic-wrapped roses, past a mail-trolley and a skinny girl waving her baby at the train. It picks up speed as the engine runs clear of the platform into the early evening sun. The sun is full in Nadine's face. She shuts her eyes and leans back against the first-class seat. Just then the brakes come on hard. There's a harsh _wheeee_ of metal and a stink of asbestos as the force of the brakes pins her back to her seat. The carriage bucks and judders, then stops. There's a second of silence. Everyone looks out of the windows. Someone starts to shout outside, a woman screams, 'Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no.'\n\nA man in a suit gets up and strides down the aisle to the door. They hear the window go down, then more voices. The screaming sinks to low bubbling moans. A guard races past the window. The man in the grey suit comes back and looks down the train at the rows of faces, all turned to him. He knows the score.\n\n'A girl tried to jump off the train while it was moving. Thought it was going to Penzance and panicked when she found she was on the wrong train.'\n\n'Is she all right?'\n\n'Was that her screaming?'\n\n'Why didn't she speak to the guard?'\n\n'No,' says the man. 'It was a woman who saw it happen.'\n\n'Jesus,' says someone.\n\n'She could have got off at the next stop.'\n\n'It's only ten minutes to Bath.'\n\n'How long are we going to be delayed? Did they say?'\n\n'There've been all these deaths recently, people falling out of train doors. They've got to be careful.'\n\n'Was she hurt?'\n\n'Did you see?'\n\n'It was a bit of a mess,' says the man, and he sits down, unfolds his newspaper and disappears behind it. A woman half rises from her seat, gropes behind her for her handbag, says, 'Oh, dear. Perhaps I ought to go and see...;'\n\n'Why? Are you a doctor?'\n\n'No, but I've done my Red Cross.'\n\n'The train door swung back and caught her head. I doubt if Red Cross is going to help.' The man in the grey suit rattles his newspaper into shape. He is very pale. 'They've sent for an ambulance. More harm's done by unqualified people interfering in these situations.'\n\nThe woman flushes. 'Well, I know _that._ It's the first thing we're taught.'\n\nTony catches Nadine's eye and the corners of his mouth turn down in a quick grimace.\n\n'I'll get us coffee. This is going to take for ever.'\n\nBut it doesn't. A few minutes later they hear the ambulance. Heads poke out of doors all down the train. The buffet window mirrors the ambulance's revolving blue flash.\n\n'They'll be taking her straight to the Infirmary,' says the Red Cross woman confidently. Grey suit taps his newspaper. Further down the carriage a young man with a ponytail goes on talking into his portable telephone. It's the same call he's been making right through the accident. His voice is loud in the silent carriage.\n\n'Yeah, just a hold-up. Go on giving me the figures back to March. Yeah, yeah, give me March again. I lost week two.'\n\nThe train squeaks, groans and begins to slide mousily along the platform. Nadine holds herself braced. Finger by finger, she makes her muscles relax until her hands are heavy as stones in her lap.\n\n'It's the driver I feel sorry for,' says Red Cross.\n\nTony returns with a bag of plastic cups, plastic stirrers, small vials of milk, sugar sachets, coffee, brandy miniatures and a cartwheel chocolate-chip cookie. He lays the drinks out on the table between them, and folds Nadine's cookie into a paper napkin for her. He pours a small bottle of brandy into his own black coffee and offers one to Nadine. She shakes her head.\n\n'Yeah, better not,' he says. 'You'll only go to sleep.' Nadine picks up her cookie and bites. It explodes into crumbs all over her black linen coat. She stands up, wriggles, and the crumbs shower on to the carpet. Grey suit watches as she sits down again, spotless, smoothing out the coat behind her so as not to crush it. The black linen coat is her own. She bought it two days ago from an antique clothing shop, the day she got paid. It is cool and heavy and has the natural glassiness of linen. The collar is wide and embroidered with thick black corded silk and tiny jet beads. It's an evening coat, thirties probably, to judge from the buttons. If she sits carefully it doesn't crease too badly. Anyway, creasing is part of linen. Under it she wears the white silk dress. Tony's taking her to a business dinner with one of his clients. They'll dine late, and stay at an hotel overnight. Tony has a business meeting in the morning, and Nadine's going to buy shirts for Kai with cash he has given her. Her hair is newly washed and shiny. The big collar of the coat loosely shadows her neck. She wears gold studs in her ears, and a plain round gold necklace, both bought by Kai two days ago. They are made of old dark gold. She's spent most of the day getting ready, fixing elastoplast to her heels where her new shoes pinch, laddering tights and buying more, following step-by-step instructions in this month's _Vogue_ on the natural summer face. It has taken her more than an hour to achieve the effortless look of a woman who wears no make-up. She's dredged her face with loose powder, then buffed almost all of it off; she's lined her eyes with grey kohl and smudged away all but a trace; she's plucked her eyebrows and thickened them with pencil. Her lashes are slicked with transparent lash-gloss, because mascara is too obvious. Nadine feels like a stranger to herself. She much prefers the kind of make-up Cathy wears when she goes to the Ring: a deliberate, dramatic mask.\n\nTony wears a very plain charcoal suit. But he doesn't look good today. He keeps yawning. His skin is waxy, faintly glistening with sweat. Still, he's being nice to Nadine. He likes the look of her opposite, upright and elegant. He can talk to this Nadine as if he doesn't know her, yet the whole thing's spiced by the number of times he's seen her stagger downstairs in the mornings to make coffee, rubbing sleep out of her eyes. It excites him to sit opposite her and know other men are looking at her, and also to know what her legs and arse look like in that big droopy t-shirt Kai has to put up with in bed at night. He can just see a slip of white in the neck of her coat where she's unbuttoned it. Perfect. Dark and severe outside, virginal inside the coat, and underneath that a hint of sexiness which is a lot more than bridal. It's going to work like magic. Nadine makes you think of money. The kind of girl you could take anywhere. She's not his type. But he's known for weeks that she'd be perfect, if he could only get the two of them together. Seeing her in the bedroom, in that white dress, he knew he'd got to move fast before someone else did. Kai's been giving definite signals that it's time Nadine started to pay her way. Of course it's much better if it doesn't come from Kai. Let Tony break the ice. Kai doesn't have to spell it out, not after all the time we've been together, thinks Tony. Yeah, I can read him like a book.\n\nTony believes in fate. Or why would Nadine come to the house, just when Paul Parrett was getting restless? He'd known they weren't keeping him happy. He wants a lot more than they've been able to come up with. He'll be off elsewhere if they don't watch it. Janine's a nice kid, but that face of hers gets you down. Blank. Ready for anything, OK, but that's because there's nothing much there in the first place. There's something a bit frightening about Janine, when you come down to it. You could tell her to do _anything_ and she'd do it. Clients think that's what they want, but two or three sessions is the most they can take of Janine. Who did he have before Janine? Oh, yeah, Susie. Susie was just starting off then, and she'd done very well. Very nicely. That portfolio of hers was mindblowing. She knew more about bondage than anyone in the business. Trouble with Susie was she had no imagination. To get a man like Paul Parrett really interested in you, you got to have a bit of imagination. A bit of mystery. He looks across at Nadine. She is looking out of the window, showing the pure line of her profile. God knows what she's thinking about. He bought her a magazine, but she hasn't opened it.\n\nThere's got to be something special about the girl, something that makes you watch her and not anyone else. It's not really looks, or not just looks. Something that makes you think about her when she's not there, till you're hooked. And Nadine's got it, whatever it is. He ought to know. So take the risk. Take Nadine. She doesn't know anything \u2013 or not much anyway. This'll be her first time. She'll be able to give Paul Parrett something that just won't be there in a couple of years. He's seen it happen before. They go dead. They get like Janine.\n\n'Thanks for the coffee, Tony,' says Nadine.\n\nHe looks at his watch. 'Nearly made up the time,' he says, 'should do it by the time we get to Paddington.'\n\n'Jesus, Tony!'\n\n'Don't talk like that, what's the matter with you?'\n\n'That girl nearly got killed, that's all. So what if we're ten minutes late?'\n\nTony shrugs. But it's quite nice, really, the way she says things like that. That's the sort of thing some clients like. Class. He looks at his watch again. Just like the way she went racing upstairs to show the old woman what she looked like all dressed up, while he and Kai waited in the hall. Paul Parrett ought to have seen that.\n\n'We'll get a taxi straight to the restaurant,' he says.\n\n'It'll be quite late, won't it, by the time we eat?'\n\n'We're meeting Mr Parrett there at ten. If he can get away from the House...; or else he'll join us later. Have something now if you're hungry. I'll get it.'\n\n'No, thanks. But I'd like a drink.' A tiny pause; then, 'Right.'\n\nNadine holds up her gin and watches the landscape through it. Evening light slopes richly on the bare Wiltshire Downs as the train flees eastward. Kai's been right across Russia by train. Day after day of it, drinking tea in a compartment, sleeping for hours because there was nothing else to do. He didn't say much about it, but then Kai's no good at describing things. But one thing stayed in her mind. He said that one morning they'd stopped very early at a little wooden station in the middle of nowhere. Siberia perhaps, but it wasn't winter so there was no snow. There was grass blowing by a fence, and blue flowers growing through the platform planking. And he'd wanted to get out, he said. It was strange how strong it was, suddenly, the urge he had to jump down from the train on to the low platform, and to walk off, just to keep walking through the long grass until the fences dwindled away and there was nothing but grass and a low scrub of silver birches and the soft moving of the wind around him. When was it that he'd talked about it? It must have been in the van one day, when they'd stopped the engine and the space between them was slowly filling up with heat. And she'd thought, one day we'll go there.\n\nThe farmland flashes by, every inch of it owned and tended. She drinks. Gin smells of childhood. She remembers the clear stream of it running into the grown-ups' glasses while Lulu flopped on the floor, tired out, ready to go to sleep soon. Six o'clock. Mother never had a drink until six o'clock.\n\n'Once you give way...;' she said. But at six o'clock it was allowed. Daddy was home with his smell of trains and cigarette smoke. He would put Lulu to bed. Mother kicked off her shoes and hoicked her legs up on to the sofa. Her tights rasped as she crossed her ankles, and Nadine shivered. Mother put up a hand and eased off her spectacles so that she couldn't see Nadine or Lulu or anything any more.\n\n'You're all just a blur,' she told Nadine. But Nadine could see Mother's face clearly. It was white, like a crumpled-up orange blossom from the garden, and there were dug-in red marks on her nose from the spectacles. Daddy took Mother's hand and rocked it through the air, backwards and forwards.\n\n'What a day. What \u2013 a \u2013 day,' said Mother faintly, sucking gin.\n\n'My poor baby,' said Daddy, taking hold of one of her feet, caressing the shimmering tights Nadine hated.\n\nThe ticket-collector sways down the aisles, printing data on to tickets. The Red Cross woman lays an arm on his sleeve, whispers questions. Nadine turns away, not wanting to hear his answers. The man's face is pale, but probably it is always pale. His light-lashed blue eyes don't meet anyone's as he hands tickets back to Tony.\n\n'I might as well keep mine,' says Nadine. 'You know how they sometimes stop you in the corridors.'\n\nTony unfolds his wallet again, hands the out and return tickets to Nadine. She looks at the price and thinks of what she could have done with the difference between the first-class fare and a cheap day-return. But no, they're staying overnight. Still, on her own she'd have caught the last train back and saved the hotel too. Kai and Tony don't think like that. Even though the client's not coming anywhere near Paddington, it's important to travel first class.\n\nThe gin's making her feel wonderful. If only it was Kai sitting opposite instead of Tony. It would be like when she first knew Kai and they sat opposite one another in pubs and talked. Pubs were new to her too, because she was only fifteen then. They never seem to have any time now, except in bed, and there they don't talk. Or was it really the same then, only I didn't notice so much, because I was younger? I didn't have any idea about what to expect.\n\nThe train goes faster and faster, bucketing on its long straight line to London. Grey suit is asleep now, the newspaper drooping from his hands, his head yawing as the train leaps and plunges. Red Cross has slumped down in her seat, and the portable telephone is silent. Only Tony sits relaxed and upright, looking out of the window. Nadine leans forward, buoyed up by the clear stream of gin in her veins. If only the windows would open \u2013 she'd love to have the wind rushing in through her hair. But everything's sealed, and the carriage smells of bacon rolls and brake linings. They're beginning to slow down. There's the first reddish stain of London. Grass grows paler and scrubbier. Nadine thinks of the fields Enid talked about, with the long summer grass swaying, and Sukey and Caro wading through it. Enid loved Sukey, you could tell. She talked about that field of grass in the same way as Kai talked of the blue flowers pushing up through the grey planks of the station platform. Lost and long ago. Or maybe you never had it anyway. Why did Caro get her name in the papers? What did she do? She must ask Enid for the rest of the story.\n\nThese fields aren't really fields any more, just sites waiting to be built on, with sale hoardings facing the train. The straight line from the west complicates itself into a maze of silver rods which cross and flicker as they run off into the suburbs. The train canters into London, clicking over the points.\n\nThe station is packed with foreign students butting everyone with their back packs. The students lower their heads and manoeuvre like a ballet of bulls. Their strong bare arms and legs glisten with tan, sun-oil and sweat. Nadine walks through them, keeping close to Tony to avoid being buffeted by red and orange nylon. A young blonde girl waving a plan of London laughs, so close that Nadine can look down her throat, then turns back to her gang.\n\nIt's nearly dusk as their taxi accelerates out of Paddington. Nadine pushes down the window. It's warm. The air's turning navy and lights are springing on everywhere, yellow and white, spilling out like the shaggy petals of chrysanthemums. Neon signs needle the air and laser lights ripple sculpture above the doorways of the big shops. London's just like a foreign country tonight, warm and glowing. Caf\u00e9 doors open on to pavements. People lounge over beers which sweat with cold through the glass. The taxi swoops round a square where a party's going on in the private communal gardens. Golden lanterns burn against heavy-leaved plane trees. Nadine glimpses a small red-striped tent, a long table covered with a white cloth which touches the grass, and then the taxi bowls on. Cries and laughter follow them like the sound of a plane which has already passed overhead.\n\nEveryone's out in the streets. There can't be a soul left in the big dark houses with their open windows. They're out on the streets in the soupy heat of evening, when the pavement is pulsing back the day's sun, but there's no glare and you can walk through blue intimate dusk for hours. The city is more alive than it ever is in daytime, and Nadine's skin prickles as she sits forward on the edge of her seat, tasting the smells of beer and burgers and dust and flesh, drinking in the beat of light and movement. Tony is a shadow at her side and she doesn't have to think about him. He's just there, taking her somewhere, leaving her free to think of nothing but each moment as they fly through it. People stroll four abreast on the pavements dressed in t-shirts and scraps of skirt or shorts. A girl walks fast, her face tilted up and her eyes inward, shutting out the street, thinking only of where she's going. Faces loom to the taxi window as it slows at crossings, then shrink back into the crowd as it gathers speed. The crowds thin as the roads become straighter and faster. Tony leans forward and the taxi-driver nods.\n\n'We're early,' says Tony. 'We'll go and have a drink first.'\n\nThe taxi stops by a dull small door. A flicker of cash, and they're out in the street while the taxi pivots and disappears.\n\n'Here we are,' says Tony.\n\n'Is it the restaurant?'\n\n'No, it's a club. We'll just have a drink here. If that's OK?' he adds, fractionally too late.\n\nThe club is a small room, darkly wallpapered, with little spindly chairs and tables and a small stage at one end on which nothing at all is happening. Three men in dark formal suits sit at one table, keeling forward slightly towards the empty stage. It's one of those rooms where something has just happened, or is about to happen, but it won't happen as long as you are there, waiting. Although there's a fan in the ceiling the air is heavy with smoke and whisky. A solid fortyish woman in black sits in the corner, adding up figures. She looks up and nods at Tony. Tony and Nadine sit on the uncomfortable chairs and a few minutes later a bottle of champagne is brought to their table in a bucket of ice by a sleepy-looking girl in red lycra. The three men at the other table gape across for a second at the dull thud of the cork, then the wine foams dutifully over the rim of the bottle as if it understands the stern need to give an appearance of pleasure. It gets its due second of attention, no more. Tony sips the champagne with a neutral expression, calls the girl back and asks for whisky.\n\n'It's a sort of rule, I suppose, buying this stuff,' says Nadine.\n\nThere are six cashews in a sea of elderly peanuts. Nadine picks them out. Not bad, not too stale.\n\n'Don't eat those \u2013 we'll be having dinner soon,' says Tony.\n\n'What's this restaurant like?'\n\n'Nothing like this, don't worry. I just come here sometimes. To see who's around.'\n\n'Or who isn't,' remarks Nadine, looking around the room.\n\n'Yeah, you're right, but then that's the point. Trisha's got a good business going. Nothing flash,' he says, nodding towards the woman in black. 'You got to respect her. She's made something of herself. Like my client, the one you're going to meet. You'll like him. 'Course he gets stressed out, all these politicians do. Well, they're watching their backs all the time. That's why he likes to relax. I want you two to get to know each other, that's why I brought you along.'\n\n'I've never met a politician before,' says Nadine. She watches red lycra sluice whisky into the three glasses opposite. The slow men in suits come to life a bit, like lions in the 200 at the approach of meat. But they are lions who are too jaded by regular meals of dead flesh to do more than pantomime the instincts they've lost long ago.\n\nNone the less the whisky disappears fast. The three men relapse into silence and the whinging of the fan becomes the loudest thing in the room. The air's extraordinarily dry \u2013 or perhaps there simply isn't enough of it. Nadine licks her lips.\n\n'Yeah, you're going to like Paul Parrett. Kai wants you to get to know people.'\n\n'Oh, come on, Tony! Kai's not interested in my friends, you know that. That's why I don't bring them home. I mean I can understand it, he's tired, it doesn't bother me at all. I can always see people at work.'\n\n'Nah, it's got nothing to do with people at work. This is Paul Parrett. You won't meet someone like him hanging around the Warehouse counting his money out of a little black purse. He's made something of himself. That's the sort of people you want to meet. People with ambitions. You're not going to spend the rest of your life taking cinema tickets, are you? You'll be seventeen soon.'\n\n'Well, it's a job,' says Nadine.\n\nTony taps his glass. 'You're wasting your time. All you are is an usherette.'\n\n'We're not called usherettes, Tony. That'd be sexist.'\n\n'Oh, yeah. Because it's an arts centre and they're all artists, really, aren't they? Or going to be. Like that Chris you talk about. Always next year, when he gets a grant, when he gets a break. Only it never happens. He'd be better off learning to cut hair properly, like Francesca. I've got a lot of respect for her. She doesn't go round calling herself an artist. She cuts hair.'\n\n'What's the matter with you, Tony? You don't even know Chris.'\n\n'I want to make you see you got choices. A girl like you. You can go where you want.'\n\n'You make it sound so easy.'\n\n'Yeah, because it _is_ easy!' He's leaning forward now. 'Most people don't have the guts to try and get what they want. In case they don't make it. They'd rather kid themselves they could have done if they'd wanted. But that's good. It makes it easier for us, because we know what we want.'\n\n'That's you and Kai. Maybe I'm not like that.'\n\nHe sits back, sips whisky, looks at her. The black sheath of linen, the white sheath of silk. The stubborn sideways face he'd slap if she was a couple of years younger.\n\n'You don't know what you're like, Nadine,' he says, dropping money on the table. 'All you let yourself think about is juggling and that old woman. Make sure you don't find out when it's too late. When nothing's on offer any more.'\n\nA shape stirs by the doorway as they go out of the club. A hand comes up and a voice says, 'Got any change?'\n\nOnly a kid. He looks fourteen, and he's shaved his head, but a blondish fuzz is beginning to grow. There's a blue tattooed rose on the crown of his skull. His eyes are big and fixed on something just behind Nadine's shoulder. He's pale and the street-lights cast odd shadows under his eyes, but his face is still beautiful.\n\n'Got any change?'\n\nShe fumbles in her bag. Tony waits. Mid-step, on his way. Then he looks at the boy's face. Nadine tries one zip compartment, then another. She hasn't brought her purse, because it's too heavy for this new evening bag, so her money is loose. Tony looks down at the boy, at the forehead, the lips, the tired blue eyes. He touches Nadine's shoulder, says, 'Wait here a minute,' turns, and goes back into the club.\n\nShe's caught. She can't just drop the pound coin into the boy's hand and move on, because she doesn't know where she's going. The boy's looking straight at her now. They can't stand here staring like this until Tony comes back. One of them is going to have to speak. She gives him the pound and he puts it carefully into a buttoned pocket of his army-style shirt.\n\n'You ought to go to a hostel,' she says. 'It's dangerous. You're really young to be sleeping out on your own.' A flicker of glee crosses his face. 'Go on, how old d'you think I am?'\n\n'I don't know \u2013 sixteen?' she flatters, remembering how kids always want to be taken for older than they are.\n\n'I'm thirteen and a half. Everyone thinks I'm older.'\n\n'Why don't you go to a hostel? You could tell them how old you are. They'd have to find a place for you.'\n\n'Yeah, right, they'd find a place for me. They'd put me straight into care, wouldn't they? You don't know what it's like. I can handle myself. I got friends.'\n\nThe little street suddenly looks dark and threatening. The boy's cocky white face in the club light is all wrong \u2013 he ought to get away...; When the light shines on him like that you can see he's just a kid, a beautiful kid. And it's not safe being beautiful out here on the streets. His thighs show through the slashes in his jeans.\n\n'Where're your friends? You ought to be with them. It's dangerous on your own. There're all sorts of people around...;'\n\n'I know that. I'm not fucking stupid. But if you're on your own, people give you money. Like you and your boyfriend. You wouldn't of stopped if I'd been with a gang. Has he gone back to the gents?'\n\nAnd then there's Tony behind her again, and behind him Trisha, and two of the whisky-drinking men.\n\n'He's just going,' says Nadine quickly. 'I've told him he shouldn't hang around here, not outside a club.'\n\nBut Trisha's in no hurry to move the boy on. She moves up to him, scrutinizes him in the lamplight.\n\n'You on your own?' she asks him.\n\n'No. I got my friends. They're just round the corner,' he says quickly.\n\n'Are they now,' she says, looking up the narrow deserted street with its black warm shadows falling so heavily they blot out everything. 'Just around the corner? Well, they're none of my business. But I might be able to help you, if you're a sensible boy. It's not safe out on the streets. You ought to get one of those Alsatians...;'\n\n'I'd like a dog,' the boy admits eagerly. 'This bloke I know's getting me a lurcher pup.'\n\n'Not as good as Alsatians, though, are they? For keeping people away. I've got a dog of my own, as it happens. If you like we might be able to come to an arrangement.'\n\nThe two men, having looked, melt back into the doorway, back to their whisky.\n\n'I'm a bit short-handed at the moment,' confides Trisha. 'One of my girls hasn't been well. I need someone to walk the dog for me \u2013 do a bit of work in the kitchens once we get you cleaned up.'\n\n'Like a job, you mean? What'd you pay me?'\n\n'We'd have to come to an arrangement, like I said. But there's a room with it \u2013 and your three meals.'\n\nHer dark, wheedling, curiously insistent eyes are fixed on the boy's. He wriggles a little on his mat of cardboard.\n\n'Come on, Nadine,' says Tony. 'We got to be going. It's nearly ten.'\n\n'No, wait \u2013' says Nadine, but the boy turns a repelling blue stare on her. Does she think she's bought him with her pound coin? Is this any of her business?\n\n'It's not the sort of thing you want to talk about out here on the street,' says Trisha. 'There's no privacy, is there? Come inside.' Tony touches Nadine's arm.\n\n'I don't want to keep him waiting,' he warns, and reluctantly she yields to the soft pressure of his hand. They start to move off down the street. She wants to say something, to call back to the boy even if it's only goodbye, but there's no one to say goodbye to. She doesn't know any of them. She doesn't know the boy's name.\n\n'We can pick up a taxi at the end of the street,' says Tony.\n\n## _Fourteen_\n\nEnid hums as she skirts the side of the square, swaying slightly, her face silly with pleasure. They don't know a real song when they hear it these days. Michael Desmoulins's 'Surprise' glides through Enid's head, perfectly on the beat in each bar. It must be years since she's heard it. These young girls like Nadine don't know what they've missed. ' _Allons_...;' chunters Enid, knocking into the iron railing, bouncing off, renegotiating the pavement corner. Just across here now. Ooops. Lights on. So you go quiet, Enid girl, quiet-as-a-little-mouse. Got to get the key in, though. Where's the bugger? Ooh, scrabble, scrabble, how I hate this bloody lock. I ought to put a bit of wire round this key, then it wouldn't slip in too far. There's a trick to it. There's a trick to everything.\n\nThere. No one about. So _up_ the stairs we go, making sure to hold on to the handrail except somebody's yanked it off the wall. Good girl. And up on to the landing, have a little rest before going up the next flight. That's right, have a nice little sit-down, you deserve it. Now if Nadine was here, we could have a chat.\n\nBut she's not. Gone to London with Tony, the silly girl. All dressed up. Dressed to kill. Though it was very plain to my mind, black and white. But stylish, you've got to admit. And it's the sort of style they'd like, Tony and Kai, being foreigners. People get the wrong idea about Italians, they think they like the flash look. But they don't. Look at their own women. Finns I wouldn't know about \u2013 if he _is_ Finnish. How would I know? I only go by what Nadine tells me.\n\nOh, he looked _very_ pleased with himself tonight. I wonder why? When the cat's away...; But she did look lovely. No wonder they say youth is wasted on the young. If I looked like that you wouldn't catch me wasting it on Tony's trips to London. Right, come on, Enid, time to get moving. Can't spend the night here.\n\nThat laugh. It's her again. _She's_ here. In their bedroom too; well, I did try to tell Nadine. But no one listens when they're young. It'd be me she'd blame for telling her, not him for doing it. Oh, they think themselves safe enough in there. Nadine's away in London, Tony's away in London. Not that Tony'd care what Kai got up to, from what I've seen of him. Very much a business point of view, Tony's. You get to recognize the type.\n\nOnly me here. And I'd better make myself scarce before one of them comes out. After all, she's flesh and blood in spite of appearances, that Vicki. She'll need to go to the toilet some time, she'd piss bile, that one. They won't hear me, not with all the laughing. Cackling's more the word for it, and a very ugly sound if she wants my opinion. Not a peep out of Kai, though \u2013 it's all her. They'll have been drinking. She's the sort who gets noisy when she's been drinking. Look who's talking. What gets me is the way he acts so holy and gets Nadine to do his dirty work for him. Oh, she _was_ embarrassed, but she thought she'd got to say it. ' _Enid, do you think you could be a bit quieter when you come back from the pub? You see, Kai's got a bit of a thing about people drinking \u2013 it upsets him when it's people in the house. I mean, I know you only have a couple of ginger wines...;'_\n\nWell, as long as he's not such a b.f. as to let her stay the night. Nadine'll know, she's bound to. You can't hide the smell of another woman. And it always looks fishy when a man starts changing the sheets after you've been away. Except Kai's supposed to have a thing about clean sheets anyway, which is handy in the circumstances.\n\n' _Kai can't bear to wear things twice. He has to have clean clothes every day. He's so fastidious. I suppose quite a lot of people are like that really, aren't they, Enid?_\n\nI should think quite a lot of people would be like that, dear, if they went where Kai goes, and did what Kai does. You've obviously never read _Macbeth._ But I don't say anything. I've no proof, and anyway, what's the point? It's no good telling people things until they're ready to hear them. Let her believe all that stuff about sheets and her Kai being fastidious.\n\nIt'll be a miracle if those two in there don't hear my knees cracking. My joints go off like pistol shots, even when I've only been sitting five minutes. Now up we go, one at a time and take it steady. Pity there's no carpet. If we had a bit of carpet no one'd ever hear me. I might as well not be there at all. That carpet at the Manchester Ladies. Nearly there. That's the way. I'll have another sit-down before I make a cup of tea. Just a small cup. You don't want to be washing out sheets again, do you, Enid?\n\nLucky I didn't tell Nadine what happened to Caro. But she's bound to ask. Why did I tell her any of it? I should have kept it to myself, the way I always have, till it's just words you can say over in the night when you hear noises going on downstairs. Or that woman laughing.\n\n' _Manchester Ladies. Manchester Ladies.'_ I say it over to myself, and I see Sukey's sweet smile and I feel her combing my hair like she was my mother. No, much more than my mother. I don't think of what happened after. What's the good? And who's to say that terrible things are any more real than good ones, just because they get into the newspapers? I know what was real. The cab and the rain and the Manchester Ladies. And Sukey in her kimono, then me in her arms. That's the sort of thing that never gets wiped out, no matter what happens after.\n\n' _Tillnext time, darling.'_\n\n_Darling,_ she always called me that. And _sweetheart._ No one'd ever used those words to me before. Nor afterwards. All the Americans called us honey. 'Hon', Clyde used to say, but it didn't mean much. There wasn't any feeling in the words. You can always hear it if it's there, like something alive in the voice. When Sukey spoke I used to melt inside. When I talked to her on the telephone, it was, 'See you tomorrow, then, darling. Good night, sweetheart.' Next time. Come again. And I did. Again and again and again. There was never a time like it. She bought a tobacco-brown silk dressing-gown for me, because it went with my hair. 'You look marvellous, darling. If you went out on the streets like this you'd stop the traffic' But we weren't out on the streets, we were on Sukey's bed and I was curled up in the silk dressing-gown and it slipped open over my legs and then she was touching me _there._ I didn't even have words for the places she touched or the things she did. _Down there,_ that was what mother called it. _Make sure you keep yourself clean down there, Enid._ We had to hide our sanitary napkins so Father and the boys never saw them. We'd slip past with our brown paper packets like thieves. It was a crime to be a woman. Never with Sukey, though.\n\n'Oh, darling, you're just exactly like silk. I can't tell which is silk and which is you.'\n\nShe taught me all the words. I used to wonder how she knew them. And she'd talk straight out about things I'd only ever heard whispered about. She'll had a baby \u2013 just one. She knew how to stop having them. I didn't know anything about things like that. People thought it wasn't decent.\n\nSukey's bed was a world of its own. Once I was there I'd forget everything, even what time of day it was. Except suddenly I'd notice things more sharply than I'd ever noticed them before. The colour the sky really was at dawn. There was a blackbird in a quince tree below her window, and I got to know every note it sang. I could have written it down, if I'd known how to write music. The only way you knew time was passing was when the sun came round to the window late in the afternoon. Sometimes it woke me up and I'd feel it on my face. I'd look up and Sukey would be there.\n\nOne week she had a bowl of Kent cherries by the bed and we ate them all day long until there was a heap of dry white stones piled up like a volcano. There were things I'd never tasted: melon, and white peaches, and crystallized ginger. Then we'd bath. We were always going to get up and go out somewhere and have dinner, but it never seemed to happen. I wasn't hungry anyway. Sukey would walk about naked \u2013 at first I was too shy even to look at her, then after a few weeks I was doing it myself. I'd tie my hair up so it wouldn't get wet, then after the bath I'd powder myself all over \u2013 Sukey had a bowl of Floris powder by the bath and a big powder puff. I loved the smell and I'd always use far too much so that it flew out in a cloud round me \u2013 then I'd let my hair come down over my shoulders and sit cross-legged on Sukey's bed and she'd look at me and I'd smile at her. What a change. A changed girl, that's what I was.\n\n'Darling. Sweetheart. Keep still \u2013 let me \u2013'\n\nAnd I would.\n\nThen it all went wrong. She was such a silly girl, Caro. Yes, that's the word for her. Silly. Though that's not the word they used in the newspapers. They called her evil. But it was silliness to be jealous of Sukey. Sukey wasn't the kind of person you needed to be jealous about. It didn't matter what she gave, there'd always be plenty left. She was a bit like the sea \u2013 if she went out, she'd come in again, you could be sure of it. Of course she was naughty. Poor Caro, really, you had to feel sorry for her. Even I did. But she fooled herself. Sukey had never pretended Caro was the only one for her. She wasn't going to be either, no matter what she did, no matter how much she raged and begged. I suppose what I saw was Caro realizing it. Caro couldn't pretend any longer that she was going to have Sukey all to herself, the way she wanted. Sukey was never going to draw the curtains and lock her door with Caro inside and be glad that the rest of the world was shut out. It wasn't in her nature. I could tell that straight away, so why couldn't Caro? She wanted all of Sukey. But Sukey wanted all of everything.\n\nThat's what it was all about, the Manchester Ladies. I don't think Caro understood when they started up the club with April and the others. She thought it was going to make them more of a couple because they had created something together. But that wasn't the way it turned out, and it couldn't have been, ever. It was a place for people like Sukey who wanted everything and didn't mind where it came from. And the thing about Sukey that made her different was that she gave everything too. Nothing was held back. Caro would have glanced at me in that shop doorway and put me straight out of her mind. But not Sukey. She brought me back out of the rain in her cab. That was what the Manchester Ladies was for; at least, that was Sukey's idea of it. But not many people would've thought like that, if they already had a warm place of their own to go back to, and friends, and someone to love them. Fires, that thick green carpet, tall lilies in jars, brandy...; she had everything. Tea that tasted like smoke in cups so thin you could see your finger through them. I had to learn to like it. Lapsang Souchong. Sukey had everything already, according to Caro \u2013 what did she want with more? But Sukey had to open the door, never mind if it let in the wind and the rain until there wasn't any warm place any more.\n\nShe showed me the secret door and then she opened it. You'd never believe how beautiful it was inside. I'm not talking about the Manchester Ladies now. It was Sukey herself; her body, her heart. What she was. Oh, she used to make me laugh. Laugh and laugh \u2013 we didn't care who heard us. But she could be so gentle. Some people would say bad things about Sukey, because she was older and she had all that money. And I know I was lovely then, though no one else knows that now; not a soul in the world. But what does it matter? Everything goes away. Sukey knew that, but Caro didn't. Sukey never made use of me.\n\nCaro was always watching us when the three of us were together. You're cruel when you're young, you don't think. You don't care for anyone else when you're happy; it's one rule for you, and another for them. Or else no rules at all. I was happy. I didn't mind people seeing I was happy. I wanted Caro to feel that she was outside, just people, and that I was \u2013 well, what? Inside. With Sukey. I was as bad as Caro, really, only I couldn't feel jealous of her. Perhaps that was the worst thing I did to her, not being jealous of her. If we're talking about cruelty. And when it comes to a murder trial, you've got to talk about it.\n\nThat description in the newspapers. Those things they put in, they never think of the people who've to read them. I suppose you can't blame the newspapers. I'd read plenty of murders before and forgotten them five minutes afterwards, because they were just stories to me. But when I read those newspaper reports about Caro and Sukey and what Caro had done to her I felt like I was drinking something down so cold there's a part of me that's never been warm since. Not even when I was pregnant. It turned into another sort of loneliness, that was all. People say having a baby changes you. I thought it would change me and make me stop loving Sukey and hating Caro. After all, it had been seven years. There I'd be at those bloody clinics they used to have, sitting there with my knickers down. It wasn't very respectable then, being pregnant, even if you were married. And I wasn't married. Girls these days wouldn't believe how they used to talk to you when you weren't married. I was a fool not to buy a ring from Woolworth's and say my husband had been killed on D-Day. But I didn't. I couldn't be bothered, really. I didn't care enough about what people thought. I'd got a bit of money saved: we earned plenty in the war. And I knew it would be over soon, and I'd move away and no one would know. Trail trail trail back to my room, pushing my shopping basket on wheels, wondering if the butcher would be able to let me have a kidney with my mince. Lucky the house was nearly falling down with bomb damage so that the landlord didn't kick me out. He was glad enough to get any rent. Offal was said to be good for you. You couldn't get anything: it was worse than the war. Austerity, that's what they called it. I was always hungry. I didn't know if the baby was growing properly. They didn't bother telling you much at the clinic in those days. They knew what was good for you. I can't really remember what it was like having him. I've never talked about it to anyone. Perhaps that's why it doesn't seem real. I like to tell Nadine about him, just so someone else will know when I die. It doesn't seem as real as me being young and on my own, outside the Manchester Ladies and thinking it didn't look anything special, feeling a bit disappointed even though Sukey was there at my side. And here I am in my little room on my own, just like I was then. You can't escape from things. You can never get away.\n\n' _The body had lain undiscovered for two days and the severity of the head injuries added to the difficulties of identification. Dental records showed...;'_\n\nThey knew it was Sukey. They must have known, even though they said she'd given a different name at the farm when she rented the cottage. I don't know why she did that, but Sukey loved secrets. She gave her grandmother's name, so it was easy enough to trace her once they put their minds to it. And someone like Sukey has always got things with her: jewellery, cheque-book, letters. _Lain undiscovered for two days._ I felt sick when I read it. When she was at home Sukey always had to take the telephone off the hook when we wanted to be alone, otherwise it'd be ringing all the time. And telegrams, and people coming with flowers. And in those days the post came I don't know how many times a day, and there were always letters for her. She used to leave them lying about open. Anyone could read them.\n\n_Sukey, do come...; Sukey, darling, we're absolutely dying to see you...; Sukey, you were a fiend not to come, I'm awfully cross with you...; Sukey, will you be at Eloise's house-party? We're absolutely dying to see you...;_\n\nThat was the way they wrote, the kind of people Sukey knew. That was a long time ago, though, I expect things have changed. All the letters would be pushed together on Sukey's writing desk until some of them slid off and fell down the back. I don't know if she bothered to pick them up and answer them.\n\nTwo days undiscovered. It was almost the worst thing. I just couldn't believe it. Not Sukey. I kept thinking, what if she hadn't died straight away, what if she'd been crawling round, crying out, going in smaller and smaller circles till she couldn't move any more. I'd seen a dog do that when it was dying. They would have found her less than an hour later if she'd been at home. But she was away, in the little cottage she and Caro had rented in the Lake District.\n\n'It's not even on a road, Enid. You have to walk up a track, about two miles on from the farm where we get milk and butter. They bring the luggage up from the station on their trap and Mrs Garside has got the most angelic daughter who comes up and cleans when we're not there. Exactly like Puck. It's absolute heaven. No servants, no bells. All you hear is the birds, and the sheep on the hills. No telephone, no callers...; You'll have to come, Enid. You'll love it. I can't wait for you to see it. And there's the most adorable pump in the yard, like a toy pump. I can't squeeze _one drop_ of water out of it, but Caro got the knack of it straight away. You've never felt water like it. It's just like silk. Caro wants to grow vegetables \u2013 there's a bit of garden with a wall round it. I can't imagine ever leaving here. I could spend my whole life in a cottage like this.'\n\nI didn't mind that Caro was there with her. Caro had said she wasn't going to sleep with Sukey any more, until she stopped sleeping with me. Well, now I can imagine what it must have cost Caro to say that, how hurt she must have been. Because you could see her wanting to touch Sukey all the time, wanting to put her arms round her and hide her so that no one else could even see her. Perhaps she thought it would bring Sukey to her senses, and she wouldn't want me any more if she couldn't have Caro. But it didn't work like that, not with Sukey. She just said that if that was how Caro felt, then she wouldn't argue with her. But she was always there if Caro changed her mind. At the time I thought Caro was lucky that Sukey was so generous. Now I'm not so sure.\n\nCaro could have escaped after it happened. She had money, she could have gone abroad. But you'd know she wouldn't, if you knew Sukey. Caro wouldn't be able to leave her, even though she was the one who'd killed her. They found Caro in a barn just a few fields away from the cottage. She'll been writing and writing and there were sheets of paper all round her, mostly about Sukey. Then she'd swallowed some sleeping-stuff she took, and left a note to say why she'd killed herself. But she was still alive. She'll taken too little and it had only made her sick. After that she was too weak to move, and she hadn't anything else to kill herself with. They said in the paper she was too weak to escape, but I don't suppose she even wanted to. She must have seen the men coming over the fields through the barn door. Perhaps she tried to run then, but she couldn't.\n\nI saw those fields, when Sukey and Caro had both gone. I went up there the next summer, after it had all died down. It was late on in June, and there was clover in the grass. The grass was tipped with red and purple and silver. I stood by the bank and smelled the grass and the sweet air blowing. We were so high up. There were short, steep little fields, and sheep. That was when I saw them, Sukey walking through the grass as if she was walking on water, smiling at me, walking and walking as the grass rippled around her, but never coming any closer. And Caro down by the field-gate, crying after her, her feet trapped in the grass. And then it was over and Sukey never reached me. That was when I knew I'd have to go away from everything that reminded me of Sukey and Caro. Keep my head down, not read the newspapers, start a new life. But it never works, not really. Some things burn themselves into you; you can't lose them even if you want to. I could close my eyes now and see them again. But I won't, not now.\n\nI hope they didn't try to make Caro identify Sukey. They must have had to carry her back over the fields \u2013 she can't have been able to walk. Still, in a way Caro'd got what she wanted. No one else was going to get Sukey now, ever. It was summer, and there was a heatwave in Manchester. Even in the Lake District it must have been warm. I remember counting the days, thinking of the green fields, and Sukey's pump, and the little garden. Her poor head was all caved in. There'd've been flies buzzing round...; They got worried down at the farm when Sukey didn't come for the milk. They'd have taken it up to the cottage for her, but she'd told them she liked the walk. She loved that walk in the early morning, on her own. It was like the beginning of the world, she wrote to me. And then she'd asked them at the farm to bake extra bread in the next batch, because she was expecting a visitor. Maybe that was what did it.\n\n'Oh, Caro, darling, Enid's coming on Saturday, just for a few days. I can't wait for her to see the cottage, can you? Perhaps she'll help you with the vegetables.'\n\nWhat Caro did next I still don't want to imagine. It's not so much the way she battered Sukey, but her going and fetching the poker to do it with. It means that she must have thought about what she was going to do, and yet she still did it. But perhaps it wasn't like that. Perhaps it was all very quick and Caro just snatched up the poker. I'd rather think that. Sukey wouldn't have known much. She'll have thought it was a joke, just for a second.\n\n'Why, Caro' \u2013 smiling and trying to calm Caro down, the way she did \u2013 'don't be silly, darling.'\n\nBut this time it didn't work. I suppose Sukey might have had a second or two to know that, to know that it wasn't going to work. But I've never seen Sukey frightened, so I can't picture it.\n\nI didn't go to her funeral. It was delayed, because the police had her body. And Caro was coming up for trial. Her family and the doctors and lawyers they paid tried to make out she was off her head and couldn't stand trial, but that didn't wash. It was very quiet, Sukey's funeral, it said in the newspaper. _Family flowers only,_ so I didn't send anything.\n\nIf you want the truth, I was frightened to go. What if Caro said something? What if she tried to make out I'd been there in the cottage? That I'd had something to do with it? Even though the police thought Caro was a murderess, she was still more the kind of person they'd believe than I was. I wouldn't have put anything past Caro. And I thought that me going to the funeral might be just the thing that would start her off thinking about me, if she got to hear about it. The police go to funerals, don't they, when someone's been murdered? Just to see who turns up. So I never said goodbye to Sukey. I still can't believe that they put her in a box and under the earth and left her for the rain to fall on her. It's ridiculous, when I know more people who are dead than alive.\n\nAnyway, Sukey's family wouldn't have wanted me there. I'd've just been part of the scandal as far as they were concerned. She had a sister who lived in Scotland, with three tiny children. The Honourable this and the Honourable that. She'll have come, but not with the children. I expect they kept it all from them. I wonder if they know now? Or won't anyone know, once I'm dead?\n\nNadine knows. I must tell her all of it.\n\nI did go to the Manchester Ladies one last time. The bombing had started. An incendiary fell flat in the street in front of me one night when I was going home. That was before I got called up and they put me in the Land Army. So I did live in a little cottage in the end, just like the one Sukey rented, though getting up at dawn is more like the end of the world than the beginning when you have to do it every day. I wasn't hurt by the incendiary. I stood looking at it as if it was a coal that had fallen out of the fire, then a warden ran past shouting at me, and shoved me into a doorway.\n\nIt was curiosity that made me go back. I didn't expect to find anyone I knew. Sukey was dead, and Caro's trial was over by then. They didn't hang her, though they might have done. They still hanged women. Ruth Ellis was the last, and she was a long time after Caro. It sounds terrible when you say it flat out like that, doesn't it? Hanging. You can't think of it in connection with a person you know. Even when it's a person you hate. All sorts of doctors gave evidence. Caro's family would have paid for them. I think they thought they'd get her off completely, or get her put into some sort of rest-home, but they didn't. The prosecution made out Caro had dragged Sukey into a life of vice and then murdered her. Then the defence said the exact opposite: it was Sukey dragging Caro, who was younger than her, and impressionable and easily led. I remember every word of it. I bought the newspapers each morning and evening, and cut out the account of the trial and put it away. I've still got it. Evidence. But even the defence and the doctors couldn't manage to make out that Sukey'd murdered Caro. So what they agreed in the end was that Sukey and Caro had both dragged each other down, and so in a way the murder was a sort of punishment for both of them. They made it sound as if Sukey deserved to be murdered. And the jury swallowed it, or most of it. It was obviously a crime of passion, and they didn't really want to look too closely at what kind of passion it was between two women. It all had to be written up in a very roundabout way in the newspapers, so that you had to guess at what was meant. It made Sukey and Caro sound quite different: sordid and furtive. You could hardly tell when they were talking about Sukey and when they were talking about Caro, because they said the same things about both of them. _Good family, sheltered upbringing, beautiful, popular, high society...; dragged down to a life of vice...;_ The hint was that they'd both become what used to be called 'sex-slaves'. It was easier for them to look at it that way than to believe that Sukey was happy. But I won't think about that now. And as for what they wrote about the Manchester Ladies \u2013 it would have made a cat laugh.\n\nCaro was imprisoned for manslaughter. She came out in the end, then she went abroad. Oh, yes, I always followed her from the newspapers. She's dead now.\n\nWhen I went there in the war there was still the little plaque outside the club, THE MILLICENT SOWERBY ASSOCIATION FOR LADIES, but the door was all boarded up. You couldn't see through into the building, but I'm sure there wasn't anything there any more. No mirrors or bathrooms or _chaises-longues._ No laughter or games of cards and five-pound notes on the floor. All vanished like a genie's palace. Just space. With the war and the bombing, clubs were closing down everywhere. But I think the Manchester Ladies had gone before the war started. There was such a scandal \u2013 you wouldn't credit it these days. It might even've got closed down because of the court case. I don't know. The police were always closing places down then, for vice.\n\nCaro didn't name me. My name didn't come out in the trial at all. For a long time I wondered why: she could have had her revenge if she'd wanted it. Everything else came out. You might think that was because she didn't want to drag me into it \u2013 me being so young \u2013 but I don't think that was the reason. I've thought about it for a long time now. It was because she didn't want anyone else to know Sukey'd loved me. She didn't want to make it seem as if I'd been important to Sukey. That was one word they never wrote in the newspapers: _love._ It would have made a quite different story.\n\nSo I just stood there and looked at the plaque. It wasn't raining that day, for once. It was quite nice, with soft small clouds in a pale sky. I thought of Sukey in the taxi, then I said, 'You've won, Millicent Sowerby,' and walked off, because I didn't want anyone staring at me. But they had better things to stare at, with the war on. The trial was a nine-days' wonder, and a couple of years later if you'd said 'Manchester Ladies', no one'd've had any idea what you were talking about. There was the war, so we soon had other things to talk about.\n\nIt's still not the full story, though. I'm as bad as the newspapers. They wanted everyone to hate Sukey and I want everyone to love her. Sukey cold and stiff. Sukey on her back on the carpet on the stone floor, with her head in the fender. But her arms and feet were perfect. Caro never touched her body.\n\nYou can't make murder pretty. Perhaps Caro was right, that's where it gets you, wanting everything. I can still feel Sukey in my fingers. Soft and warm and quick. But she was hard too,\n\nThere she goes again. That one downstairs with Kai. Laughing. Out loud, she doesn't care. Why should she? She knows Nadine's not here. And I'm nothing. She reminds me of Caro. Maybe she's right and it doesn't matter if I hear them. I'm not much of a witness. If she looked at my record she'd feel she was safe enough. _Knows when to keep her mouth shut._ That's me.\n\n'Oh, Caro, Enid's coming on Saturday. Poor darling, it'll do her good to get out of Manchester for a couple of days. I'll get some cream from the farm \u2013 we'll have to feed her up a bit. I expect she's frightened of cows, wouldn't you think, darling?'\n\nI know that little bubble of laughter, laughing at me, at Caro, at the rain, at the whole world. I still want to scream out and warn her, though she's been dead for more than fifty years, ' _Sukey, don't laugh!'_ I don't know if I'm really trying to warn her, or if I want to scream at her because I'm angry too. I'm still angry. Then Caro's shadow crosses the room so fast Sukey doesn't even see it. The last thing she hears is the poker hissing down on her head. And Caro laughing. It was easier for the jury to think Caro was out of her mind, but I don't believe it.\n\nLet that one downstairs laugh. I shan't say anything to Nadine. You can't make murder pretty and you can't tidy it up either, any more than you can tidy up love. I'll tell Nadine that.\n\n## _Fifteen_\n\n_The cottage, morning, June 1938._ The early mist's clearing \u2013 look, it's nearly gone. A few streaks of it wisp up and dissolve as I watch. The fells look like a horse after a gallop, with steam coming off its flanks. I wonder if we could ride here? Caro would like that. What a day it's going to be. What bliss not to be in Manchester, or London, or anywhere but here.\n\nCaro's left the bucket under the pump. I plunge my arms down into it, lift handfuls of silky water to my face, sluice my arms. Nothing matters here. An old cotton dress, my hair brushed back, my feet bare. Yesterday we sunbathed naked in the shelter of the wall. Caro had to lie in the shade, with her white skin. Her special redhead's smell comes out when her skin's hot. She had her eyes shut against the sun. Coral nipples, blue-white breasts, deep-dented navel. Her hair is exactly the colour of the fronds of a sea-anemone. Moving in and out, sucking...; poor Caro. I ought to find a sea to put her in \u2013 a cool green sea with caves and seaweed where she could hide from the sun, flicking her tail. She shouldn't have been left here on dry land where there isn't any shade.\n\nLook at my arms! But I don't care if I go brown as a gypsy. I would hate to burn, like Caro does. I want to soak up the sun until there's no winter left in me. The air here smells of hay and sheep-droppings, and warm stone. But the inside of the house is always dank and dark, even though it's so hot. You can smell the meat-safe. And there's too much polish on everything.\n\nMy little Enid is coming. I nearly told Caro last night. And then I thought I would wait. As soon as she knows, she'll watch me to see if I'm thinking about Enid, waiting for her, wanting her. Enid would think nothing of walking up from the farm carrying her own suitcase. She's like a little pony, with her long hair flapping and her funny little dusty brown face. And those eyes, light as water. She doesn't wait and watch me...;\n\nCaro's never had a child. Imagine a baby being born out of Caro. What a fight that would be, and who'd win, I wonder? Odds on Caro any day. But no baby's ever going to get the chance, I know that, darling. You don't need to give me one of your fierce looks. She doesn't like it that a baby's been where she'll never be, no matter how hard she tries. Actually inside me. It's different, making love to a woman who's had a child. Everything's been used. Ralph noticed the difference after I had Johnnie. 'Not so snug any more, Sukey darling.' I know what Caro thinks when she sucks my breasts. _Someone's been here before me._ Well, it was a long time ago, darling. The nurse used to bring Johnnie in much too late, after he'd been screaming for hours. Such nonsense, all those rules. She said it would spoil him if I fed him before the four hours were up. Poor Johnnie would be so angry with me. Dark red in the face, sweating, eyes tight shut. He'd crowd my nipple into his mouth, then he'd break off for one last sob. He'd stare up at me with those big wet navy-blue eyes. But it was the nurse's fault, not mine. Johnnie always smelled of potatoes when they've been boiled too long and they fall to pieces and the cook tries to push the bits together. And you have to send them back.\n\nSilly Caro. What difference does it all make anyway? She's always asking questions. Do Ralph and I still sleep together? Does he ever come into my bedroom? Ralph has his own life, I tell her, and I have mine. I couldn't manage the spare, but I did produce the heir. And that was the end of that.\n\nIt wasn't quite, of course. Nothing ever is. It'll happen on a summer night when it's too hot to sleep and Ralph comes home after a party. I like him black and white and tanned and just a tiny bit rumpled. He might ask me to help him with his cufflinks because he can't manage them. I might suddenly notice his wrists. Ralph has nice wrists. He sways and we laugh. I smell champagne, and whisky, and something else.\n\n'You smell of one of your girls,' I say.\n\n'Speaking of girls, how's Caro?' he asks, freeing one hand, sliding a finger down my spine.\n\nCaro says that Ralph is a monster. Isn't it true that he knows the Mosleys? He goes to their house, doesn't he, Sukey? I daresay. I don't know where Ralph goes. House-parties, trips to Bayreuth and Venice, weeks and weeks in London. Everyone laughs when I say I'd rather be in Manchester. And now I have my Enid, my pony, so strong and so silky. Ralph always goes back to his own room afterwards. The bed's suddenly cool and I hear the curtains flutter. I stretch out my legs and lift up the sheet and let it billow back down on me. Bliss.\n\n_Evening._ 'Caro...;' I say. She looks up. We're in the parlour. When two people sit in the ugly little tapestry chairs their knees almost touch. The sun never comes round to this side of the cottage. The windows won't open and the room smells stale. But Caro wanted to come in out of the sun because she had a headache. She'll had too much sun. Her face is puffy and her eyes are red. There's a fly by the window, kneading the pane with its legs, trying to get out. It doesn't know that the windows don't open. I ask Caro if she'd like to go upstairs and lie on the bed with the curtains drawn to keep out the light. But she says no, it's stifling up there under the roof. It'll be cooler outside, I say, what about putting chairs under the apple tree? No, she says. No. The fly rasps against the window. I want to walk up to the hayfield.\n\nShe lies back, shuts her eyes. I know she wants me to touch her. I stand and say, 'I'll just go and get things ready...;' not thinking about what I'm saying. Caro's eyes snap open.\n\n'What do you mean, get things ready?' she demands. 'I've peeled the potatoes. There's cold lamb in the larder. I've put muslin over it. There's no need for you to do anything.'\n\nI can't imagine eating cold lamb. Fatty, congealed stuff. I hate the way meat smells on your breath in summer.\n\n'I'll go up and look at the spare room,' I say. 'To see if Hannah's dusted it. Perhaps the bed needs airing...;'\n\n'Why?' she cracks out at me like a pistol-shot. Both eyes are fixed on me now, reddened and wary.\n\n'Well, darling, I've asked Enid if she'd like to come up for a couple of days. On Saturday. I thought it would be such bliss for her to get out into the country. You know how hard she works, and it's awfully unhealthy for her to be stuck in Manchester all summer. She's looking pale.'\n\nThe eyes glare. 'If she comes, I shan't stay.'\n\n'Oh, Caro darling, _really._ Don't be absurd. We can't have all this again.'\n\nCaro heaves herself up in the chair. A clumsy movement \u2013 it must have hurt her head. A dull red tide creeps up her face, and her eyes go slitty. Where have I seen that look before?\n\n'She can't come,' shouts Caro, and her voice cracks but she goes on. 'I absolutely forbill it!'\n\nThe fly is frightened. It beats wildly at the pane of glass which is never going to give way. I drop down on my knees by the side of Caro's chair.\n\n'Caro, darling!' I remonstrate. I take her hand. I look at the flush and rage on her face and suddenly I see it. Why, she's like Johnnie! She's like my baby, pulling back from my nipple because he was too angry with me to feed. And I feel my face shiver with laughter as we look at one another and I open my mouth to tell her about Johnnie. Even Caro will see that it's funny, and then she'll come out into the cool sweet garden with me...;\n\nBut then there's a jerk as she pulls back. I can't hold her. Her head lurches over the side of the chair as if she's going to be sick. She reaches down, scrabbling on the floor. I can't see what she's doing.\n\n'Why, Caro!' I say and just then she rears up above me and I feel the rush of her arm coming up and the air shudders, then splits over me, but I'm still laughing about how much Caro looks like Johnnie as Caro's face flares like a torch, roars up in light, goes dark.\n\n## _Sixteen_\n\nCarborundum and knife flash in the air. Dull and bright steels scissor against one another. Nadine shivers, though the dark-panelled restaurant is warm and a wide colonial fan turns just above their heads. The waiter swivels his meat-trolley like a small stage, presenting it to the table. On the carving tray there is a sirloin, pure meat, bloody and muscular but bred for tenderness. The waiter poises himself, adjusts angles of knife and carving-fork, and addresses himself to the joint like a bullfighter, his dark face serious above his work. He cuts a slice across the joint and it falls juicily across the plate he has laid ready. The slice of meat laps over the plate. But that's the point of this place. The vegetables are good but mundane. New potatoes, shelled peas, sliced carrots. There's horseradish sauce made with freshly grated horseradish, and English mustard. The beef is of the finest quality, properly killed and correctly hung before being roasted in the huge joints which permit a unique combination of flavour and juiciness.\n\nPaul Parrett hands the horseradish to Nadine. She smiles, takes it and smears a dab on to the side of her plate, where it turns red from the oozing meat. Tony cuts his meat rapidly into narrow strips and swallows them efficiently. This is not Tony's kind of restaurant at all, even though Nadine's gathered that he's paying for the meal. And even Tony can't possibly have an arrangement here. There'll have to be money put on the table. She half smiles, thinking of it, and Paul Parrett catches her eyes. His moist, incredibly quick dark eyes flicker about the table as if the whole thing is a private joke which he's just about to share with Nadine. Nadine warms to him. He's extraordinarily attractive, for someone who shouldn't be attractive at all, with his round eyes and fleshy face. His photographs don't do him justice. It's the energy in him \u2013 you can almost hear it humming. And when he switches his attention to you the force of it stops you thinking whatever you were thinking about him. Since they've come into the restaurant she's never once caught his glance sliding sideways towards the other tables, where there must be more important people he knows.\n\nHe was at the table waiting for them when they came into the restaurant. Paul Parrett doesn't need to make a point of arriving late. He knows what he's worth, and so does everyone else. He's shorter than Nadine expected. She's seen him on TV, read the interviews and the gossip, seen the photographs and the cartoons. His face on the news was part of her coming into adolescence. He was always being given new jobs and smiling in Downing Street. Images stick in her mind: Paul Parrett going in and out of important doorways; Paul Parrett walking alone down a long white beach towards the camera, his dark body brisk against the waves; Paul Parrett speaking fluent German to his German opposite number, Paul Parrett on election night.\n\nThen there was the early life of Paul Parrett. Illegitimate war-baby, adopted into a small terraced house in the outskirts of Manchester, rising through scholarships, fast footwork and the assumption of public schoolboys' effortless assumptions. Even someone who wasn't interested in politics couldn't help knowing about Paul Parrett. He took up space. He was still on his way up. Even before she met him, he took up space in Nadine's mind. She'll thought he'd be tall, but when he stood up to shake her hand he was an inch or so shorter than Tony. At once, that was the height to be. He was powerful all right, and although he was heavily built you could see how quickly he'd move if he had to. He was almost bald, but then he'd been bald since his twenties, she'd read in some profile or other, and so it didn't seem to age him. He hadn't compensated with a beard or a moustache. His eyes melted and twinkled at her as they shook hands and she smiled back.\n\nAll this meat is going to send her to sleep. If she eats the whole plateful she'll spend the rest of the evening in a stupor, digesting it. Nadine pushes her plate to one side.\n\n'What's the matter? Don't you like it?' asks Paul Parrett, leaning forward to scan the barely touched slab of sirloin and the small blood-sodden potatoes.\n\n'I'm fine,' says Nadine. 'I'm not very hungry, that's all,' and she picks up her glass and drinks off the dark red wine which seems to taste very faintly of blood as well. Tony says nothing. Nadine's never known him so quiet. He's simply eaten his slice of meat and crossed his knife and fork very definitely on his plate. How on earth could Tony and Paul Parrett have got to know each other? Business, of course. But what? Paul Parrett's on a different level completely.\n\nThe wine tingles deliciously in her veins, right down to her fingertips. The heavy silver glitters and the white napkins are glossy under the lamps. One napkin has a tiny exquisite darn across its corner. It appears more luxurious than a perfect napkin, for who can pay for such darning to be done these days \u2013 and who knows how to do it? Nadine fingers the stiff linen, her head bent. She feels her body dispose itself in still curves, with soft flattering light breaking on the surface of her skin. Both men are watching her. It's back again, that power she possessed in the bedroom with Kai, when she put on the dress. It floods her body. Or is it just that she's had too much to drink? Paul Parrett mentions a film he has seen lately. _Jesus of Montreal._ Not a new film, it's a few years old now. But he doesn't get tired of it, because the photography is so good. All those shots looking down over the city. And the magic \u2013 had she realized there were so many magicians around then? Has she seen it? Nadine begins to explain about her job at the Warehouse and the chance this gives her to see films seven or eight times and really get to understand how each film is constructed, but Tony breaks in, interrupting her so crudely that it's quite funny. He hasn't seen _Jesus of Montreal \u2013_ what's it about? Paul Parrett and Nadine both start talking at once, then both laugh and fall silent. But it doesn't matter, because he is one of those people you can be silent with very comfortably. Being in his physical presence feels like doing something. He's not having this effect on Tony, though. Tony is really on edge tonight. What's the matter with him? She's really making a big effort and paying a lot of attention to Paul Parrett, and she knows that's what Tony wants. A few moments later the head waiter comes to Paul Parrett's side with a note on a tray, and murmurs into his ear. Paul Parrett excuses himself, says it's a bore, but it won't take long. Now she can ask Tony what's going on.\n\n'What's the matter with you, Tony? We were just getting talking.'\n\n'Nadine, for fuck's sake, you don't come here and talk about usheretting in a cinema. Look at the people.'\n\n'Ushering,' Nadine corrects him automatically, then looks around. A wall of dark backs, white shirts, discreet, rumbling, authoritative voices. Dashes of colour: a bow tie here or a cummerbund there. The clientele is overwhelmingly male. The atmosphere is one of serious eating and talk, and it's a little intimidating, but also a little absurd. However, Tony wouldn't see that.\n\n'He doesn't want to talk about your job,' pursues Tony doggedly. 'He wants to talk about you.'\n\n'He doesn't even know me.'\n\nTony crumples up his napkin and drops it on top of his knife and fork.\n\n'People can get to know one another, can't they?'\n\nSuddenly and for no reason, she thinks of the boy in the alley. One minute he was alone, the next he had a job to do, a home, someone taking an interest in him. He was taken inside to where there were lights and warmth and proper meals, not a padding of newspapers, a hamburger and cans of lager. And look at the way she'd met Kai. If anyone'd been looking at it from the outside, they'd have thought it was a pick-up. But from the inside, you know how things really are.\n\nPaul Parrett's dark-suited arm brushes her bare shoulder as he comes back to the table. He looks refreshed, like a man who's slipped in an extra couple of drinks while pretending to go for a pee. But she doesn't think he's a drinker. He likes wine, but he's left his glass a third full for over half an hour now.\n\n'Time for pudding,' he announces, his eyes glistening. Even Tony brightens, but one look at the trolleyful of treacle tart, bread and butter pudding and jam roly-poly and he slumps back in his chair, clearly itching for a cigarette. Paul Parrett scans the trolley and asks, 'Isn't there any summer pudding?' and then to Nadine, 'The summer pudding is wonderful here. You must try it.' The waiter frowns with mortification at being caught with an empty dish. He sends an acolyte off to the kitchen to fetch another pudding and it arrives whole and perfect on a plain white plate, moulded and pressed into shape.\n\n'They put an iron weight on top of the plate overnight,' says Paul Parrett with satisfaction. The first slice is for Nadine. It comes out in layers of red and pink, the bread almost jellied with seeping fruit juices, the raspberries and redcurrants and blackcurrants crushed, releasing their fragrance into the bread. There is special cream to go with it, so thick it has to be cut with a knife. Nadine tastes the pudding. Tart fruit, sweet juices, bland bread, a coating of cream. It is almost too good to swallow. Then it's gone.\n\n'Would you like some more?' asks Paul Parrett.\n\n'Yes, please. It's wonderful. You ought to try this, Tony.'\n\n'You're hungrier now,' says Paul Parrett, as the second slice slithers on to her plate and Nadine cuts into the cream. The wine waiter has brought Sauternes and she swallows alternate mouthfuls of sweet wine and pudding. The meat and the clouded red-wine glasses are whisked away and forgotten. Perfect. She sighs with pleasure. A third slice perhaps? No. It would be too much. It would spoil it. Paul Parrett is watching her attentively. She lifts her glass to him. Tony looks positively ill with bad temper. If he's enjoying the evening as little as this, Nadine wonders why he bothered to set it up in the first place. It's not going to be cheap.\n\n'Coffee somewhere else, don't you think?' says Paul Parrett. 'What about coming back to my flat? It's warm enough to drink our coffee out on the roof-garden.'\n\nIt sounds a great idea to Nadine. The day is turning out well, after such a bad start. They must do it again. If only Kai was more sociable. All he ever wants to do when he isn't working is to stay at home, mostly in bed, mostly asleep. It was so different when they first knew each other. But Paul Parrett is saying something to her. She jerks her attention back to the table.\n\n'... all right by you, Nadine?'\n\n'Yes, that's fine. There's no rush \u2013 Tony's booked our hotel, haven't you, Tony?'\n\nHe nods gloomily. He ought to have shaved before they came out. A man like Tony really needs to shave twice a day. The dark shadow on his cheeks isn't very attractive in this fight. Paul Parrett looks so fresh, so vigorous and newly bathed. He smells very faintly of soap and an astringent cologne she doesn't recognize. The waiter comes up with the bill and presents it to Tony, who pays with twenty-pound notes and a faint air of reluctance which Nadine hugs to herself gleefully. Only she understands it. It's not really that Tony's mean, but he does so much prefer to come to an arrangement. Paul Parrett winks at her, a lightning wink. She loves people who wink.\n\nAt the restaurant entrance Nadine looks out for a taxi, but the next moment a Jaguar pulls up at the kerb, with a driver in it. I suppose they have to have Jaguars, thinks Nadine. British cars.\n\n'Here we are,' says Paul Parrett. 'Jump in,' and they do, Tony in the front by the driver, Nadine and Paul Parrett in the back. The car pulls away and Nadine leans back luxuriously, breathing in the smell of leather. Nobody speaks. She shuts her eyes for a second. Are they touching, or not touching? She thinks she feels his arm brush against her coat. The car swerves and they lean together, then apart. Tony says abruptly, 'I got to get back to the hotel to make some phone calls. If you drop me, I can get a taxi.' His voice sounds strange. Maybe he's drunk more than she realized \u2013 or is he ill? He's been so quiet all evening.\n\n'We could do that,' agrees Paul Parrett calmly. A slight shock goes through Nadine. It's the word 'we'. The coupling of her name with Paul Parrett's. Excitement sparks through her.\n\n'But Tony,' she says, 'I don't even know where the hotel is. You'll have to give me the address.'\n\nTony scribbles on a bit of paper and passes it back to her.\n\n'Any taxi-driver'll know it,' he says. 'Make sure you get a black cab, not a minicab.'\n\n'My car will take her,' assures Paul Parrett, then he leans forward and tells the driver to pull in where he can. Cabs go up and down here all the time, he tells Tony. The car slides into a gap; Tony opens the door and gets out. He glances into the back of the car, but doesn't really look at either of them. 'Goodbye, Nadine,' he says, and slams the car door. How strange \u2013 he hasn't said goodbye to Paul Parrett, after arranging the dinner for him. As the car accelerates away from the kerb, she looks back and sees Tony walking off fast, his head down. Luckily, Paul Parrett isn't in the least bothered by Tony's departure. He doesn't seem to have much interest in Tony at all, which makes the grouping of the three of them at dinner seem even more random now than it did at the time. Of course it's a business connection, not a personal friendship, but even so...; Paul Parrett leans back expansively in the dusky rich interior of the car.\n\n'Nearly there,' he says. They haven't driven far. They must still be in Westminster. There's the river down there. The car swings in abruptly and dives down into an underground car park. There is a security check, and then they are inside and the driver is parking the car in a brilliantly lit space. He comes round and opens the door for Nadine. She wanders a few yards, as if across a floodlit stage, while Paul Parrett says something to the driver. Then Paul Parrett leads her across to an internal door, past another security man who looks steadily at Nadine, registering her image in his brain for the future. They get into a lift which shoots up to the fifteenth floor in a disturbing muffled silence. The building is new. Even the planes of the lift are beautifully moulded. There is a large print of fish on the wall. She reads the title: 3 _Poissons Minces._ A mirror on the opposite wall makes slim vivid fish swim up the building beside them, bright as petals.\n\nWhen they get out they walk across the corridor to a door of heavy pale wood, with a tiny camera eye winking beside it and a system of alarms which Paul Parrett defuses with what looks like a credit card. Inside the flat it is dark. There's a big, wide, dark space in front of her, not a hall or lobby. Hesitantly, Nadine steps after Paul Parrett into the room. A light springs on, not inside the room but outside, beyond the windows. She breathes in sharply, can't help herself gasping aloud at what she sees.\n\nIn front of them there is a wall made entirely of glass. Yet it's framed by the black shadows of leaves, and a small, perfect and formal garden is floodlit just outside, as if floating in the air above London. There are tubs of bay and orange trees, white jasmine trained to wreath round circular frames, glowing troughs of strawberries and cherry tomatoes, roses in tubs, low rosemary and lavender hedges clipped round gravel walks. The leaves move gently.\n\n'There's always wind up here,' says Paul Parrett.\n\nBeyond, there is the wider frame of the city's tarnished orange skies. Headlights crawl up and down choked streets. Then there are bright necklaces of bridges and the dark stain and reflection of the Thames. Paul Parrett goes forward and unlocks the double-glazed french doors to the roof garden. The air is warm but breezier than down on the streets. Vine leaves around the door flicker, and the smell of tobacco plants blows past Nadine.\n\n'Wind is the problem up here,' says Paul Parrett. 'That's why I have all these hedges. They slow it down. Fencing doesn't work as well. It creates currents and the wind force increases. That damages the plants. They burn and they bruise, even if they don't break.'\n\nHe touches the petals and leaves of his flowers as he walks, familiar, not needing to look to know where they are. It is like watching him run his hands over the body of someone he's loved for a long time.\n\n'Have a strawberry,' he says. 'These go on fruiting right into September.'\n\nThe berry is small, but its flavour is far more intense than the commercial strawberries Nadine knows. It takes her back to the strawberries her grandfather grew by his greenhouse, dark red and brilliantly seeded with yellow. She never dared take one without asking. Crushing Paul Parrett's strawberry under her tongue, Nadine walks after him to the edge of the garden.\n\n'Careful,' he says. 'There's only a low wall,' and he takes her arm to steady her. The wall is below her waist.\n\n'I sleep out here sometimes, in summer,' says Paul Parrett. The words seem to go on moving in her after they've died in the air. _I sleep out here._\n\n'Is there security out here too?' she asks.\n\n'It's all very safe. Don't worry about it.'\n\nNadine glances back. Behind, by the french doors, another little TV eye points at them.\n\n'Doesn't it bother you,' she asks, 'being watched all the time?'\n\nHe shrugs. 'You get used to it. It's just functional, it's not important,' he says. He's kept his arm round her, but now, aware of the TV eye, she stiffens. At once he lets her go.\n\n'Coffee,' he says.\n\nThey return to the apartment and he settles Nadine on a long mole-coloured leather sofa while he goes to make coffee.\n\n'Take a look at the books \u2013 they're mostly new. You might find something you like,' he says, gesturing to the table. She wonders if he's read any of them or if they are placed there freshly each month as the bestseller lists come out. There are two novels, a biography and a poet's collected letters. She looks, but does not open any of them. The sight of the books depresses her. On top of them there's a battered book on fruit-growing. There is a panel of stained glass set into the wall dividing the enormous sitting-room from the kitchen. The design is a dense abstract forest of greens, lit from the other side. As she looks the segments of dark and lighter green appear to lap and move, like leaves in the wind. Nadine sits upright on the mole-coloured sofa. She's taken off her black coat. The smell of coffee begins to move through the room. He's taking a long time \u2013 what's he doing, grinding it, roasting it? Growing it, perhaps. It wouldn't surprise her to find a small coffee plantation out there in his roof-garden. Nadine yawns helplessly. Her stomach feels empty with tension in spite of the summer pudding.\n\nPaul Parrett comes back and puts a tray of coffee and _petits fours_ on the table. It touches Nadine to see a grown man like him keeping sweet things in his house.\n\n'I thought you'd like something sweet. I always get hungry after drinking,' he says.\n\n'You didn't drink much.'\n\n'No, that's true. So there's no excuse. Never mind. As long as you eat some, I can too.'\n\nGreedily they both stretch out for the marzipan, the almond, the dark bitter chocolate. He sits very close to her. Again they touch, or don't touch, as the shaving of space shifts between them. She wonders if he can hear her heart. The coffee is hot and strong, perfectly brewed. She stretches out her legs, slips off a shoe, touches the soft carpet with a bare foot. Does he live alone? There's no marriage as far as she knows, and she doesn't think any children were mentioned in the profiles. You'd think he'd have children. There are no photographs in the room, no notes or letters or clutter, no pinboard, no sheets of telephone messages. She can't even see a telephone. If she didn't know who he was, she'd think it was an empty life. Paul Parrett puts down his coffee-cup and looks at her.\n\n'Light,' he says. 'Miss Light. It's an unusual name. Is it your own, or is it professional?'\n\nNadine stares at him. 'I'm not an actress,' she says, wondering what lies Tony's told to make her sound more interesting. That explains why he didn't want her to talk about her job. A curious expression flickers on Paul Parrett's face. It's the look of one who wonders how well a new actress is going to perform in a play he knows and loves. His small berry-like eyes shine. All at once Nadine looks behind her. She doesn't know why she's looked round, but she's absolutely sure, suddenly, that they're not alone in the flat. Someone else is here.\n\n'What's the matter?'\n\n'I thought I heard something.'\n\nHe tenses, and in one movement reaches behind him and presses something. A second later a voice floods out of the grille above the hatch to the kitchen. She'll thought it was a ventilation grille.\n\n'Is there a problem, Mr Parrett?'\n\n'Not immediately. Has there been any movement tonight?'\n\n'No, sir.'\n\n'Anything over the line?'\n\n'Nothing tonight.'\n\n'All right.'\n\n'Do you want a check, sir?'\n\n'Not now. Run the video through for me, would you?'\n\n'I'll get Archard on to it.'\n\nThe flat, matter-of-fact voice stops. There's no click. The line's open all the time. Is it two-way?\n\nPaul Parrett looks at Nadine as if there's been no interruption. He must be so used to this that it's like the water he swims in. Security. She's never seen it in action before, not like this. Smooth and powerful like a current that flows so fast it doesn't break the surface. As long as you're going with it you don't notice how fast the shore is going by. How far out to sea you are. It must be like this all the time for a government minister, especially one who's had to make tough decisions in his time, like Paul Parrett. Nadine's only ever glimpsed the outer flanks of Security. She knows about Underground stations taped off with red and white barriers, megaphoned voices telling everybody to leave the building by the nearest exit, cars racing through traffic lights with dark-smudged figures in the back, square miles of London sealed off for hours and no mention on the TV news that night. But she doesn't know about a set-up like this. Where is she supposed to fit in?\n\nThey're probably checking her now. After all, they don't know anything about her. She could be anyone. White silk dresses would cut no ice with his people. They want to see through to the flesh beneath, to brain and bone. They need to know what she is thinking. Paul Parrett takes off his jacket. She smells the cottony scent of his shirt, and very faintly his sweat. He picks up her hand and holds it.\n\n'You have beautiful hands,' he says, stroking the bones and the hollows on the back of her hands. She flashes him a look and their eyes meet in amusement. She could really like this man, if it wasn't for Kai, she tells herself, knowing that she does like this man, in spite of Kai.\n\n'Don't forget I work in a cinema,' she says 'I know all the lines.'\n\n'I was surprised when you said that. I thought you worked with Tony.'\n\n'Tony's just a friend. It's Kai I'm with.'\n\n'Oh? You're with Kai?' A quick look, surprised perhaps, as if this is something new to him. Not altogether a flattering look. Perhaps he doesn't like Kai.\n\n'Yes,' says Nadine. 'Do you know him, or just Tony?'\n\n'Not really. We've met.'\n\nThey sit quietly. It's been a long day, thinks Nadine, going back in her mind to the sudden lurch of the train and the noise of the ambulance. When I was thrown forward, that must have been the moment the door hit her head. I wonder what happened to her?\n\n'Has Tony gone into the details with you?' murmurs Paul Parrett, tracing the bones of her wrist.\n\n'Well, no, not really.'\n\nHe continues to hold her hand, lightly stroking her wrist. Don't stop, don't move, she thinks. Keep doing this.\n\n'That doesn't matter. We'll go on into my room in a minute. It'll be easier to show you. It's so tedious explaining things, don't you think? Would you like some more coffee? Or brandy?'\n\n'No, I'm fine.'\n\n'Sure? Or the bathroom? It's through behind us.'\n\n'No.'\n\nThey stand. He's fractionally shorter than she is. She holds back, dragging a slow bare foot through the thick carpet. He's assuming a lot, but never mind, she can soon put him right. And she flexes her toes in soft wool and lets the dress slither into shape around her and knows she doesn't want to put him right about anything. It's so nice here, so special and cut-off and secret that anything which happens only happens by rules which stop applying the moment you leave. It wouldn't necessarily affect Kai...; or anyone...;\n\n'I've been wanting to tell you all evening,' he says, 'what a marvellous dress that is.'\n\nThe flat is bigger than she thought. A corridor with several closed white doors leads to his bedroom. A big dark bed, severely made with white sheets and blankets, fills most of the small bedroom. The air is cool, neutral. There are no books or flowers or pictures. She's still looking round as Paul Parrett bends down and pulls what look like cr\u00eape bandages out from under the mattress. She touches one. The material is extremely strong and slightly stretchy when she pulls it. It looks like some kind of orthopaedic apparatus. For a moment she wonders if he has a bad back and wants her to help him with his exercises. Or perhaps he needs support. The high hard bed might be a hospital bed. But it's too big.\n\nOne of the bandages is fixed at each corner of the bed and there are two at the sides of the bed, with a clip-lock at the end of each strap. Paul Parrett touches them lightly, just as he touched the leaves and flowers in the garden. A little more than a touch, a little less than a caress. Nadine stares at them blankly. She must be very tired. All this is brilliantly distinct, but it doesn't make sense.\n\n'Here we are,' says Paul Parrett.\n\n'I'm sorry, I'm being stupid \u2013 I must have had too much to drink.'\n\nHe touches each bandage in turn. 'It's easy, don't worry. These go round my wrists \u2013 these are for my ankles. You clip these over my waist. You'll have to check that they are absolutely secure, because there's a bit of give in the fabric' He guides her hand. She feels the give. 'The key's in the top right-hand drawer of my bureau. In there. I'll beg you to unlock me but you mustn't give in. No matter what I promise you.'\n\n'And what do I do?'\n\n'You stand there, so I can just see you if I turn my head. But I've got to struggle. You mustn't make it too easy. Pull your dress up but keep it on, so it looks as if it might fall down any minute. You mustn't come near enough for me to touch you. Then just masturbate the way you normally would.'\n\n'I don't,' says Nadine.\n\n'Don't what?'\n\n'Don't masturbate.'\n\n'Come on. A lovely-looking girl like you. You must do. I would, if I were you.'\n\nThat twinkling complicit smile again. His white shirt glows in the dusky room. She can't help smiling back.\n\n'A beautiful girl like you,' he amends it, once she's got the joke.\n\n'All the same, I don't. I never have,' says Nadine.\n\n'For me?' he says. 'Surely you could manage?' guying it slightly, turning his hunger into a game. For the first time he moves her. She feels something more than excitement and curiosity. Behind the twinkle and assurance she glimpses humiliation. This is what he has to have. He can't do it any other way. A man like him with all his power and money and charm and warmth. A man at the top of a long slippery slope that lots of people would like to see him go sliding down, arse over tip. It can't ever be easy to ask. Here are my straps. This is what I require. What tact he's had to learn to be able to pass it off like this. He's like a doctor explaining a tricky treatment. And he's a conspirator too, a magician with his straps and his secret garden. How many times has he had to go through it all? And how many of the women have agreed? What about when he was young, before he had all his money? What can it have been like then? Perhaps he had a girlfriend and she went along with it at first, before she realized it was all he was ever going to want. To have her in his arms was never going to be the point.\n\n'What's the matter? Are you worried about cameras? There isn't one in here.'\n\n'No, I wasn't thinking about that.'\n\nHe sits down on the bed. It's as if they've just got married. Her white dress, his dark suit and white shirt, the severe hotel-type bed. Their awkwardness. Two people who have got to know one another in fully clothed public daylight wondering, 'Where do we go from here? How do we start?'\n\nHis smile is becoming fixed and the room fills slowly with embarrassment and something more familiar, something she wants to wipe out before it can grow any more: pain.\n\n'It's all right,' she says. 'You took me by surprise, that's all.'\n\n'Tony doesn't go into detail with you, then,' comments Paul Parrett, and he bends down to untie his shoes.\n\nBlood shocks up into her face. The room seems to squeeze tight round her as her heart squeezes tight inside her. She stares at him.\n\n'How could Tony tell me anything? He didn't know this was going to happen.'\n\nFrom a great distance she hears his voice, faintly protesting, faintly mocking, calling her to order. 'Nadine!' he says, like a parent told a transparent lie by a small child. 'Nadine!' It's all still a game and there's everything to play for. Then he looks up and sees her face. His fingers go still on the laces. He gets up from the bed.\n\n'That man's an idiot. He told me it was all fixed up. Is this supposed to be some sort of joke? What he's playing at?'\n\nHe's scenting it again, the old spoor of his humiliations. And he's not putting up with it any more, not now. His eyes contract. They are dull and small and dangerous, staring at her.\n\n'I'm sorry,' says Nadine, 'Tony didn't tell me anything.'\n\n'The fucking idiot,' says Paid Parrett.\n\n'You thought I was a prostitute,' says Nadine.\n\n'I wouldn't use that word.'\n\n'Why not? You thought Tony was paying me.'\n\n'And he's not?'\n\n'No,' says Nadine, and then she thinks of the fresh twenty-pound notes, the new knives, the cases of wine, the big house, and she sees herself at the kitchen table, drinking the smooth red wine she could never afford to buy, but she says again, 'No. I don't charge.'\n\n'Then what the fuck was he doing?' says Paul Parrett. 'Letting you come here?'\n\n'I don't know. I don't know what the fuck he was doing,' repeats Nadine. 'I'm sorry.' She is hot with shame. The cr\u00eape bandages hang flaccidly down the side of the bed. 'I'd better go,' she says.\n\n'Hang on a minute,' he mutters. She looks at him. He's amazing. He's back in control. He doesn't want anything now. He's not angry about anything. It's she who feels weak and apologetic.\n\n'I feel awful,' she says.\n\n'He should feel awful, not you, as he'll find out. But he's not worth wasting time on. Whatever are you doing with a man like that?'\n\n'I told you, I'm not with him. I'm with Kai.'\n\nBriskly, he smooths down the bedcover which is dented where he has sat on it. He is utterly self-contained now, armoured against her. She feels a pang of regret for the steady warmth of his attention, gone now and never going to return.\n\n'I'd better go.'\n\n'No. Wait a minute. I'm thinking.'\n\nHe sits on the bed again, hands on knees, silent. She can sense the energy of his thinking. Like his physical presence, it communicates. She feels it and she begins to be frightened. What if he's thinking of the security implications, now that she knows what she shouldn't know? These days even people who call themselves friends are on the phone to the tabloids for ten thousand pounds. What's to stop her? Is he thinking about how he's going to stop her? The walls of the room squeeze in again. She's closed in by walls, by the corridor, the secure entrance to the flat, the TV eyes and the microphones, the sealed lift, the secure car park. No one knows she is here except people who are employed to look after the interests of Paul Parrett. And Tony. The white dress is sticky under her arms. Don't say anything. Don't blabber that you won't tell, you'll keep it a secret, please \u2013\n\nHe turns to her with a warm smile. 'Never mind,' he says. 'Forget it. Let me find your coat, and I'll call my driver to take you to the hotel.'\n\n'That's all right,' she says quickly. 'I'll pick up a taxi.' If only she can get out on to the long dark blowing streets, into a black cab which has nothing to do with Paul Parrett.\n\n'No. My driver will take you. You don't want to be out on the streets on your own at this time. When you see Tony, tell him I'll be in touch.'\n\nHis voice is not even menacing, but she feels a stupid impulse to defend Tony. 'I ought to have guessed,' she says. 'I was stupid. I didn't think.' As soon as she says it she knows it's true. Much more than stupid. Wilful ignorance, that's what they used to call it at school. She didn't know anything. But she knew everything, all along.\n\nPaul Parrett doesn't make any judgement. He leads her out of the bedroom, down the quiet corridor with its winking red eyes to the living-room. The roof-garden glows under its carefully placed lights.\n\n'Your garden is so beautiful,' she says. If she thinks only of what is happening now, at this minute, she'll be all right. She mustn't look ahead.\n\n'Yes. It's a wonderful occupation,' he says. 'But you're too young to need occupations.'\n\nThe leaves blow around the window, just touching the glass, feathering it. It's well past midnight and the wind is getting up. The weather's breaking at last, not with a storm but with the steady strengthening of a cold current of air from the northwest. Paul Parrett opens the french window and moisture flows in. There's a slick of rain on the leaves. The wind carries a pungent smell of the first rain on city roads and roofs after a long drought.\n\n'I love that smell,' says Nadine.\n\n'It's caused by a microbe reaction, did you know that?'\n\n'No, we never did that at school,' she answers without thinking, and feels him look at her. They move towards the window. The wind and rain in the air plaster Nadine's dress against her legs and damp the short ends of her hair. She rubs her arms.\n\n'I didn't show you my apple trees,' says Paul Parrett, and they move over towards the edge of the roof. They are very high up. The city tilts and wheels under their feet. She looks out. A big plane winks its way westward to Heathrow, lumbering down the sky.\n\n'Here they are,' he says. Sheltered by the low hedges there are six big tubs with branchless apple trees growing in them like fruiting poles. Immature apples cluster on the stems in bunches of six or seven.\n\n'Ballerina,' says Paul Parrett, but the trees have no grace. They are maimed ballerinas with their limbs chopped off. He looks at them with satisfaction.\n\n'They've done very well up here. There'll be a reasonable crop this autumn. See, this is where the fruit comes, near the stem. I'm going to try an espalier peach next, against that wall. With protective screening it ought to do all right.' They stand looking down over London while he talks of his garden. A thin stream of cars races over Westminster Bridge. The night air tastes delicious after the trapped air in the bedroom. If only they didn't have to go back into the flat, down the lift-shaft, into the glare of the car park. It is safe here, with the smell of rain and things growing. He seems to have forgotten what took place in the bedroom. He talks about his garden as if he's in no hurry for her to go. But the intensity of his concentration on her has gone. Nothing will happen now. It wasn't a beginning, it was just something short and stunted which could never have grown. She can't help feeling sorry. In a moment she'll have to go away from his hidden garden, down into London. She'll have to start thinking then.\n\n'Time to go,' he says. 'My driver will be waiting for you at the lift door.'\n\nAgain she feels a pang of fear. 'I can easily get a cab,' she says again. Lights spill away down long roads into nowhere, over desolate flyovers, all the blank spaces that connect London. All the quiet places you can take someone you want to silence.\n\n'No,' he says again, inflexibly, taking her elbow and guiding her back into the flat past the steadily recording eye.\n\n'What happens when you're not in office any more?' asks Nadine. 'Can you get rid of the cameras?'\n\nHe brushes off lily pollen from his immaculate suit. 'Oh no. They're with me for life, I'm afraid. But, as I said, you get used to it.'\n\nHe looks up and smiles and she smiles back. Her fear subsides for a moment, like a wave backwashing to gain power.\n\n'Your coat,' he says, placing it delicately on her shoulders. He reaches out and ruffles her hair. 'You ought to grow your hair,' he says. 'Much too disturbing this way. How old are you, Miss Light?'\n\n'Nineteen.'\n\n'Are you sure? Have you got parents?'\n\nShe can deal with this one easily enough as a rule. Explain about Lulu, and most people get deflected. They all have a story about a friend of a friend who's had a handicapped baby, or a child who's made miraculous progress through the Peto Institute. It's just that she's tired tonight.\n\n'I don't see them,' she says.\n\n'Really? That seems a pity.'\n\nNadine's mouth twists. Stupid weakness.\n\n'That was the wrong thing to say, wasn't it?' he asks. 'I must be more tired than I thought. Losing my grip. In my job what you don't say is as important as what you do say. But it's a pity, all the same. You need someone to keep an eye on you, otherwise you end up with the Tonys and Kais. Someone older.'\n\nFatherly, protective. What about older people who want you to tie them to their beds with cr\u00eape bandages? 'Keep an eye.' At once she sees Enid's door, half open. Enid watching and listening.\n\n'I've got Enid,' says Nadine.\n\n'Enid? Who's she?'\n\n'She lives in our house. Right up at the top, like you. But it's only a little room in the attic. She'll love a garden like this.'\n\n'Is she related to you? Your grandmother or something?'\n\n'No. Enid hasn't got any children. At least \u2013' She hesitates. It's Enid's story, not hers. But he doesn't know Enid and he'll never meet her, so it can't matter. 'She did have a baby, but he was adopted. It was ages ago, just after the war. So she hasn't got anyone.'\n\nHis hand, which has been lightly moving in her hair, goes still. 'What's her other name?'\n\n'Shelton. Tony and Kai can't stand her, but, as she's a sitting tenant, they can't get rid of her.'\n\n'How old is she?'\n\n'I'm not sure. She lies about her age, but I know she's over seventy-five.'\n\n'Over seventy-five.' There's a silence. His hand is quite heavy on her hair. She looks up and sees that his eyes look as they did in the bedroom, but it's nothing to do with her this time. He's a long way away. Tireder than he knows. Then he snaps back to where they were.\n\n'She must be a bit of a nuisance, I suppose, this old woman? Would you like to get her out as well?'\n\n'No. I like Enid. Kai and Tony don't know her like I do. We have a good time. We talk a lot.'\n\n'Do you,' says Paul Parrett. It's not really a question. His bright eyes are intent again and the force of his attention is on her.\n\n'What's she like?' he asks abruptly.\n\n'Who, Enid? It's hard to say. You can't always tell what's Enid being Enid, and what's Enid being old. She gets tired suddenly and it's like a light switching off. But she's not like that, really. She loves bright colours. She wears yellow pyjamas, and she's got a red velvet hat. We go down to the pub in the evenings. She likes that.'\n\n'It sounds as if you look after her.'\n\n'No, if I'm making it sound like that, I'm getting it wrong. It's just as much the other way round. Enid's got amazing energy. More than me in a way, even now. More than most people ever have. She's had an interesting life.'\n\n'Has she? And I suppose Tony and Kai would like to make it more interesting for her, would they?'\n\n'Oh, they wouldn't do anything like that. They've never harassed her. Kai wouldn't do that. It's just that they don't like her being there, that's all.'\n\n'But you do.'\n\n'Yes. I like her being there, up at the top of the house. She doesn't go out much. She's always there when I come back from work. Whatever time it is, she's awake.'\n\nAs soon as she starts talking about Enid she knows she loves her. She wants to go on talking about her. And yet she abandoned her and walked away down the stairs with Kai, with the dress rustling in a carrier-bag beside them. She chose Kai.\n\nPaul Parrett has come alive again. He couldn't possibly be more interested in her than he is. No wonder he's gone up through life like a rocket, she thinks, leaving a trail of people behind him dazed and glowing.\n\n'Nadine, it's wonderful talking like this, but you ought to go. You look worn out. I'll call my driver. Where are you going? Not back to the hotel, surely?'\n\nShe's not afraid any more. The sense of threat, whatever it was, has dissolved. 'No, I'll go straight to Paddington. I want to get home.'\n\n'Will Enid still be awake? Will you go and talk to her?'\n\n'She might be. I'll probably go up and see. Sometimes she's awake all night, and Kai's away.' He seems fascinated by the idea of Enid, for some reason. He reaches into his breast pocket, pulls out a wallet, extracts a card. It has no name on it, only a telephone number. 'There. You can reach me on that number, if you give them your name. I'll get back to you. I want us to keep in touch. Will you do that?'\n\nShe slips the card into her handbag.\n\n'Be careful what you say to Tony,' he says abruptly. 'I'll sort it out with him.'\n\nWhat a change. Half an hour ago she could have sworn he wanted to rub Tony out like a dirty smudge on paper.\n\n'You mean, not let him know what's happened?'\n\n'Better not, don't you think? Keep him guessing. It would put you in an impossible position in that house. You need time to think what you're going to do. When you know, get in touch.'\n\n'Yes.'\n\n'You might talk to Enid.'\n\nNadine thinks of the Manchester Ladies. Yes, she thinks, surprised. Enid is the only person I could talk to about all this. She'll probably understand.\n\n'Keep in touch,' says Paul Parrett.\n\nThey stand by the lift, in a space full of white windowless light. There's a drone behind the wall, from air-conditioning or other machinery. Nadine smells Paul Parrett's clean skin and cologne. She's exhausted. She'll like to lean against his chest and listen to the strong pump of his heart. It seems as if she's coming closer to him, not going away at all.\n\n## _Seventeen_\n\nLondon air, bruised by rain, spreads over Nadine's face. She hesitates, one hand on the car door. The driver waits. His body, packed into dark clothes, is tense and athletic. She pushes the car door slightly but it doesn't move. It must be bullet-proof, if not bomb-proof.\n\n'I'll close it,' says the driver, and there's no choice but to get in and let him shut the door on her.\n\n'It's a hotel you're going to, isn't it?' asks the driver. 'Can you give me an address?'\n\nHis voice is civilly neutral. There's no hint of speculation in it, no suggestion that he knows what has just gone on in the fifteenth-floor apartment. He'll have had the message: 'No good. She's coming out now,' from some bored observer trained to read clues in voice, body posture, speed of movement, flicker of an eye. Or from another observer who only has to play back the tapes of what happened in the garden, on the sofa, in the bedroom. For she doesn't believe there's no camera in the bedroom. There would have to be. How many times has all this happened before? There must have been other times when it didn't work out. But usually it'll be OK. He'll play very safe, with known girls, known agencies, people who understand what's required. She's a bit of grit in the machine, but the machine's designed to override things like that. She's leaving with more than any of them could guess, thinks Nadine. Her hand is still warm where he held it, and his card is in her bag. There's another story in it, as well as the one the driver knows. 'Didn't Mr Parrett tell you? I've changed my mind. I'm not going back to the hotel. Can you take me to Paddington?'\n\nHe nods, looks at her, asks, 'Do you want me to phone through for you? Check the times of your train?'\n\n'No, thank you. I've got a timetable.' And I don't want you to know where I'm going. Even though you're bound to know that the only place I'd take a train to at this time of night is home. Has it been checked already? Has my address come up on the screen, date of birth, place of birth, current residence? Paul Parrett didn't need to ask me for my address. Foggy ghosts of Kai and Tony and me on computer screens.\n\nThe air in the car is conditioned and tastes of nothing. He drives fast and skilfully and Nadine relaxes. In a few minutes she'll be out again in the anonymity of the station concourse, the long wait, polystyrene cups of late-night coffee and chocolate croissants which taste of metal and fill in a few minutes of boredom. For now she's safe. Nothing's going to happen, because this is time out of time. If she'd stayed with him, what would be happening now? She'd be pulled into his story, sucked dry and spat out. Or would she? Wasn't there something she ought to have risked, if only for the sake of that moment when she walked into his secret garden hung above London? It reminds her of something else she's heard recently. Another secret door opening. That's it. Enid and the Manchester Ladies. Thank God for Enid. The one person she's going to be able to talk to. Funny how he asked about Enid. And he's not going to tell Tony what happened: that Nadine Light didn't perform. Tony's risk didn't work. _Did Kai know?_ She can't ask him. If she says a word to Kai that will be the end. The end of the business, the end of the partnership, the end of the house, the end of her own exemption from the harsh laws by which Kai judges everybody else. And if Tony gets his version in first...; Tony's clever. Nadine knows how a story can be shaped and slanted. How different it can be made to appear if the storyteller starts at an unexpected place on the web and feels his way in along the thread nobody else would have chosen. Tony's quite capable of that. But he won't. Tony'll keep quiet. Whatever he was planning, it's gone wrong and Tony won't want to advertise that, not when Paul Parrett is involved. You don't want to get on the wrong side of a man like him.\n\nNadine rolls up her coat sleeves and rubs her arms, which are prickling with gooseflesh. He said he'd make it all right with Tony. That means all right with Kai too. The driver glances back and asks, 'Shall I put the heating on?'\n\n'No thank you. I'm not cold.'\n\nYou'd think that he'd need all his attention for the road, at this speed. She puts up her hand and touches the back of her neck, where Paul Parrett's fingers brushed and lay for a moment on her skin. The skin is warm. The car swings left, and into the Paddington taxi-rank.\n\n'This'll be the best place to drop you,' says the driver. 'I could wait while you check that train, if you like.'\n\n'No, it's all right.' He's terrifyingly professional. He makes her feel as if he's there to look after her, even though she knows that's not true. The whole thing has an eerie perfection which she really can't handle. Imagine having someone like that with you all the time, phoning ahead, checking things, making sure there aren't any hitches. That's what it must be like to be Paul Parrett. The driver opens the door for her and she clambers out, twitching her coat over her bare legs.\n\n'Goodbye. Thank you.'\n\n'Mind how you go,' he says, straight-faced. She laughs and waves at him, then hurries away, conscious that he's watching. Maybe he's waiting in case she doubles back and leaps into a taxi and he has to follow her. Maybe he's watching to see if she goes to a telephone. If Enid had a phone she'd ring her, then someone would know that she was on her way home. It feels safer to be expected.\n\nAt the front of the concourse she cranes up, scanning the departures. Yes, there's a train, stopping at every stop, going all the way home. It's in already, being cleaned on the platform. A big-hosed machine goes from toilet to toilet, sucking them out. It's late and everything's closed except the fast-food stalls under the departure board, bright striped and nervy with neon. There's a party of late theatre-goers waiting. They've been on to supper afterwards and now they're a small bubble of gaiety, watched by a weary Indian family with two sleeping children, by a group of businessmen, by Nadine. They stand in a circle, laughing together, shielding the pleasure of their evening like a cigarette-lighter flame in the wind.\n\nThe train rackets through darkness. Going westward, going home. White faces doze opposite her. They are two young men with lager cans close to their sleeping fists. They don't look as if they belong here in the first class. Opposite, a businessman irritably punches numbers into his calculator, then gives up, leans back, shuts his eyes. The train puts on speed and the businessman's mouth slowly opens as he's sucked down into sleep. Far up the carriage there's the last chink of laughter from the theatre-goers, who have brought wine with them, knowing that the buffet would be closed. The slender threads that bind the passengers snap one by one as they separate into sleep. Nadine can't sleep. She watches foreheads, lips, eyes. All those lonely things going on inside them. That businessman \u2013 what's he dreaming about? His lips are moving. If the train wasn't making so much noise she'd hear him talking in his sleep. She wonders if Paul Parrett is asleep now, out on his roof by the maimed Ballerina apple trees, under the jasmine and the rain, trusting himself not to wake and sleepwalk over the edge of the roof so that he wakes for a startled second, then plunges down into London. Are his lips moving too? She wants to lean close and hear the words.\n\nThe train cries out, thundering into a tunnel. The ticket-collector walks back up the aisle, having checked all the tickets. He pauses by the two young men, but does not wake them. His eyes meet Nadine's in the unspoken conspiracy of those still awake among sleepers. He goes on up the train and the automatic doors hiss.\n\nSoon she'll be home. No Tony, no Kai. Kai's away overnight, on another business trip. Enid will be alone in the house, and she'll be lying in bed, listening to the house begin to creak as the wind gets up. Enid's never liked Tony anyway. She'll believe anything of him. 'That one', she calls him. Once she said she was sure he carried a gun. That's what you do when you're alone all the time, you make up stories. On and on goes the train, through darkness, past mooning power-station stacks, past orange lamps and platforms rushing by so fast Nadine can't read the names. It bucks and sways and Nadine remembers racing the engines round the track on her cousin's electric train-set, and how the trains flew faster and faster, showering sparks, until they jumped the points or shot into the buffers. They always crashed, no matter how well the train was going, no matter how much she and Rupey hung over the papier m\u00e2ch\u00e9 tunnels, willing the trains to break their record. They are going so fast that she'll be there soon. Going westward. Stepping westward. Westward. She loves the word. If only she could go on past her station and sleep a little and wake for a second at Dawlish as the sea rocks up to the train windows like a field of wheat, then sleep again through Launceston and Bodmin and Redruth and Camborne, all the way down as the stations get littler and the stops more frequent until at dawn the train comes to the end of the land and there's nowhere to go but the sea.\n\nAnd then what? Bed and breakfast until the money runs out. Sleeping on the beaches, washing out her underwear in the public toilets and slipping past hotel receptionists to get to the bathrooms for an illicit bath. Eating bread, and bread, and more bread until her stomach is cold and heavy with it. Juggling in bus-shelters while rain lashes the sands. If she's lucky, a tiny part-time job in a tiny part-time arts centre. Or perhaps she could live with a fisherman. She smiles and her reflected smile leans in to meet her from the train window. She shades her eyes and blots out the reflection. There are lights sprinkled over the big dark Wiltshire Downs, like sweat drops on the flanks of a horse. Business goes on, day and night. Some businesses go on better at night. All the invisible deals going on, like cards falling perfectly into patterns. Used, often-dealt, sweaty cards, tumbling like petals. Tony and Kai work late. Places to go, people to see. How easily the words fall into the rhythm of the train wheels.\n\nTrains are lonely places. It's all right in daytime when you can catch somebody's eye as the conductor tells you for the fourth time to place your luggage in the spaces provided, or that a child's green and black bumbag has been found towards the rear of the train. She hadn't heard right at first. She'll thought he said 'bomb-bag'. A child's bomb-bag. Somewhere in the world, in some desperate corner where only explosives have a voice, there'll be a group working in a safe house, making bombs to fit into a child's small zipped bumbag. And somewhere else, in ventilated underground rooms, Security will be learning to identify them. The information will float up on to one of the screens which hedge Paul Parrett. 'Child's bomb-bag, approximately 12 cms by 8 cms, black strap, green and black nylon, no distinguishing marks. Child unidentifiable.'\n\nThe computers will be whispering about her still, back in Security, brushing in the last strokes of the multi-dimensional portrait. _'Colour of eyes: grey. Colour of hair: dark brown. White Caucasian female, nineteen [?] \u2013 possibly younger. No scars or distinguishing marks. White silk dress, black linen coat, black leather handbag, black pumps. No trace on police computer. No previous security record. Fingerprints obtained from coffee-cup. Voice-print available.'_ Even my own mother wouldn't recognize me. Especially my own mother, fast asleep in her curved wooden chalet above the lake, breathing in the smell of the communal vegetable gardens beneath her open window, listening for Lulu even in her sleep.\n\n'Where's Deenie?' The rasp of Lulu's voice. When she's upset only the family can understand her.\n\n'She's fine, Lulu. She's back in England with her friends, remember? Now go back to sleep. Back to sleep, Lulie-lu. Back to sleep.'\n\nI'll go to Enid. She won't mind me waking her up if she's asleep. She lies awake, with her memories, those memories she's so worried I'm not going to have. She'll make me some tea in the thin china cup, and she'll open a new packet of Rich Teas for us. The tea won't be strong enough and Enid'll call it water bewitched. And the biscuits are flour and water. I'll dip them in the tea \u2013 we'll even put sugar in, it doesn't matter for once. I'm so tired. It could be shock. Now, for the final part of our evening's entertainment we present...; the unshockable...; the unstoppable...; the unforgettable...; Miss LIGHT. He thought it was a professional name. Cathy says it's a good name for a performer. I thought he thought I was on the stage. He thought I thought he thought. My fingers are jumpy, they won't keep still. Or else it's the train that's trembling. I'll go up and up the stairs to the attic, without turning on any of the lights so that even the house doesn't see me. It's Kai and Tony's house, not mine, and I haven't the strength to make it mine tonight, or to call it home. Up and up the dark pillar of the house, away from the rocks and the sea, to where Enid keeps her light on. It's like the beam of a lighthouse. If I follow it, I'll come safe home.\n\nEven the traffic sounds like the sea up there in Enid's room. You can't hear voices, and if you shut your mind the traffic and voices could be waves and seagulls. In her lamplit room Enid's waiting for me. No. That was the witch locking up Rapunzel in her tower. She only did it to keep her safe. She had the right idea. What did Rapunzel think she was going to do with all that yellow hair? I'd tell her to stay in the tower. That old witch knew how to look after her. It's not safe outside. What they don't put in the story is that the witch got too tired and she couldn't take care of Rapunzel any more. That's what the story's really about. Mothers getting tired and bored.\n\n'Go back to sleep, Lulu. Deenie's fine. You don't need to worry about her.'\n\nI can't picture her face any more, only her back. Mother's back turning away from me as she bends down doing something for Lulu. And Daddy's hand stroking Mother's crossed ankles as she lies back on the settee. I'll sleep with Enid all night, and in the morning Kai will come looking for me. He'll say the words that'll magic away what Tony told Paul Parrett. It was just part of the dark, one of Tony's things. Arrangements.\n\nThe taxi-driver has been waiting at the station since one o'clock without a fare. Business is bad. He's not really a taxi-driver. He's just driving taxis until he can get another HGV job, but there's nothing going. No vacancies, no interviews. He's rung round thirty firms: nothing. There's not a lot of money in taxi-driving: the rent's a hundred and thirty a week, that's just to get your calls put through, then what with petrol and repairs and insurance you're looking at eighty, ninety quid a week take-home pay. And he can see the drop in the number of fares, even in the nine months he's been driving. When you used to meet the London trains there'd be a long queue waiting for taxis. Now there's half a dozen. Well, there isn't the business. People aren't travelling the way they used to. Day out, was it?\n\n'No,' says Nadine. 'It was a business trip.'\n\nHe overcharges her but she tips him anyway. The house is as dark as she knew it would be, and the taxi-driver waits, engine running, as she fits the key into the lock and pushes open the door.\n\nImmediately she smells cigarette smoke. Tony and Kai don't smoke. It might be the stale smell of her own cigarettes. It's nauseating. She really must make the effort to give up. This is an unfriendly house to come back to. She snaps on the hall light and its too brilliant glare shows nothing. She'll go straight up to Enid. No. She'll take off this dress and coat first. She never wants to wear the dress again: its washed silk smoothness feels clammy against her skin. Unbuttoning the linen coat she walks up to the next floor, to their bedroom, and opens the door.\n\nThere isn't much light but there's enough. It shows her a tumbled heap on the bed. It shows a shape which is too big to be just Kai. Bodies. A rasp of panic begins in Nadine's throat but she does not cry out. She grips the door frame with her left hand, while her right hand continues automatically to unbutton the black linen coat. Her eyes get used to the dark and she sees more. Kai is on the side of the bed closest to her. He has fallen asleep on his stomach. But he never sleeps on his stomach. One hand hangs, knuckles down, brushing the floor. The other is around the right breast of the naked woman lying on her back beside him, so close that their heads are touching where hers leans into the angle of his neck. The pose is unconscious, and very beautiful. They are both deeply asleep and the woman is snoring slightly, because she is on her back. Nadine pushes the door wider, so there will be more light for her to see them by. Now she knows the woman. It's Vicki, her tanned predatory face smoothed out by sleep. She hasn't taken off her gold bracelet. One knee has kicked aside the rust and gold duvet, and Nadine's linen sheets are tangled between her thighs. Nadine looks at Kai's hand on Vicki's breast. He is not touching the nipple, but the soft shallow curve of the breast, spread sideways under its own weight. The touch looks tender, as if his hands remember Vicki and know she's lying beside him even though he's now deeply asleep. His body is utterly relaxed and his face turns sideways, towards Vicki.\n\nAll the buttons on Nadine's coat are undone. She raises her unbuttoning hand to her mouth and bites it hard, but not so hard that she'll draw blood. She bites to stop herself crying out. She mustn't wake them. She daren't wake them. It's like childhood again, standing by Mummy's and Daddy's bed after a bad dream, willing them to wake and take her in with them. But they never woke. They sailed on in their dead-beat sleep. Sometimes Mummy whimpered, dreaming of Lulu.\n\nNo. I am not that child. No. You won't make me back into her. I should have known it when you came to the door with your older-woman voice, your experienced face. I was a fool, thinking that you were one. You took me in with that violin lesson patter. You wanted me to think you were the business side of Kai's life. Nothing to do with us. No danger. I kept my eyes shut while yours were wide open.\n\nBut even you can't see everything, Vicki. You don't know where I've been and you don't know what I know. Downstairs there's a drawerful of knives. Tony's taken off the plastic wrap and they're as sharp as your eyes were when you looked round my house. But I'm not that sort of a girl.\n\nThe way they're lying there, they look like old friends. Friends of the same age. That's where real friendships grow. She'll know all the songs he knows, the ones I don't know.\n\nKai. Open your eyes. Look at me. She isn't beautiful at all. That tired old tanned skin. Give her two years and she'll look like a crocodile, that's what you said.\n\nBut they sleep on, adult, omnipotent.\n\nEnid is only dozing. She sleeps lightly with a book by her bed and the lamp-switch dangling just within reach. Often she wakes and makes tea and reads a chapter or lies there, thinking back into the past. She doesn't mind the night, or long for the dawn. She adapts to the shape of each night, noisy or quiet, sleepless or dream-filled. She wakes easily, so tonight she hears Nadine's light tap immediately, and her bedside lamp is on before Nadine has started to turn the doorhandle.\n\n'It's only me.'\n\n'Are you all right, dear? Is something wrong?'\n\nThe girl looks as if she's gone out wearing her slip as she advances into the room, milk-white and pinched, trailing her black coat, her arms crossed over her chest, hugging herself.\n\n'What's happened to that lovely dress?'\n\n'It got dirty.'\n\n'You don't look too good. Shut the door. I'll put the fire on.'\n\nEnid pulls back her nest of sheets and blankets, sticks two frail bare legs over the side of the bed, and toes around, feeling for her slippers.\n\n'Let me lie down on your bed a minute,' says Nadine suddenly, going so pale that Enid thinks she's going to faint. Hurriedly, she pushes aside the blankets and makes space for Nadine. Nadine lies still, looking up at the ceiling. Slowly, her colour returns.\n\n'I thought you were staying in London,' says Enid.\n\n'I was, but I came back.'\n\n'Pity,' remarks Enid. 'Coming back when nobody was expecting you. You look as if you saw something you didn't expect either.'\n\n'Did you know they were here? Did you see them?'\n\nEnid pauses. 'Well, not as such,' she says. 'But I heard her. She laughs so loud I can't help hearing her. They think no more of an old woman up in the attic than they'd think of a nest in the chimney. I don't pay attention to much of what goes on. See no evil, hear no evil.'\n\n'Has she been here before?'\n\n'She has, dear. Once or twice. I didn't like to tell you when you seemed so sure it was only business. Though business and pleasure is all the same thing to your Kai, I don't need to tell you that.'\n\nTriumph in Enid's voice. She's got it right again. Right about Kai, right about the business, right about all of it. I was wrong. She's vindicated herself.\n\n'I wondered if I ought to say something to you when I saw you ready to go to London with that Tony, you looking so lovely and him looking like the cat that'd got the cream. So what happened to your dress?'\n\n'Nothing. It's dirty from sitting on the train.'\n\n'Did he try something on, then, Tony?'\n\n'No. Nothing like that. There was a misunderstanding, that's all.'\n\n'And now there's another misunderstanding downstairs in your bedroom, concerning your Kai, is that it?'\n\n'Oh, Enid. If you knew, why didn't you say? You could have told me. I'd rather have known.'\n\n'No, you wouldn't. You wouldn't have wanted to believe me. You'd have gone and asked your Kai.'\n\n'And he'd have kicked you out, is that what you were worried about? Why didn't you think about me? Why did you leave me to find out like this?'\n\n'You don't understand. It wasn't the right time. Anyway, who was I to interfere? It's not my house. It's not my business where the money comes from. I live here, that's all.'\n\nEnid scrambles off the bed and tugs down her night-dress. Her wispy hair is pinned up with pink-tipped hairgrips and she has rolled a thick yellow cr\u00eape bandage round one knee. She reaches down and feels the knee cautiously, intimately, as if pressing a sponge-cake to see if it's done. All she thinks about is herself, thinks Nadine, why did I ever expect anything else from her?\n\n'I'm going to make us both camomile tea,' announces Enid. 'No sense in losing a night's sleep on top of everything else.'\n\nShe really is unfeeling. As far as she's concerned it's no more than if I'd lost my doll or fallen over and cut my knee. She can't begin to imagine \u2013 or perhaps she hasn't got any imagination. Nothing shocks her because nothing sinks in.\n\n'So what was your other misunderstanding \u2013 the one up in London?'\n\n'Tony's a pimp,' says Nadine.\n\n'Yes, dear, I should have thought that was on the cards. Though they're very high class, aren't they, your Tony and your Kai? You wouldn't catch _them_ putting girls out on the streets.'\n\n_'Kai!_ No. It was Tony I was talking about.'\n\n'Was it, dear? I thought they were partners? Isn't that what you were always telling me?'\n\n'Well, they call it a partnership, but Kai's the one who's really in charge,' replies Nadine automatically \u2013 then hears herself.\n\nEnid says nothing, she just watches Nadine, her light clear eyes friendly and curious. Then she prompts, 'But you must have known there was something up. Where did you think all the money was coming from?'\n\n'You know they deal in property. They have to take some risks \u2013 the law's so stupid \u2013'\n\n'Oh, isn't it,' agrees Enid at once. 'Isn't it stupid? Now which law were you thinking of? The one that says you can't put old ladies out on the streets if they're taking up space in a house you want empty, or the one that says you can't put your girlfriend out on the streets to earn a bit of cash for you? Both equally stupid, no doubt.'\n\nShe drops a handful of dried camomile into a pot and puts the kettle on the boil. Nadine sits up on the bed.\n\n'O\u039a. Tony's a pimp and Kai's in partnership with him. So, for God's sake, stop calling them my Tony and my Kai. Where does that leave me?' asks Nadine. 'I live with Kai. I couldn't afford this place on what I earn. Not even the food we eat, let alone what we drink.'\n\n'I can't answer that, can I, dear? I live here too. Anyway, it's not as simple as that. Show me the girl who wakes up one morning and decides, \"Oh, yes, that's a good idea, I'll go out on the streets. I've always wanted to be a prostitute.\" No, it's all much more gradual, at least it is the way Kai and Tony do it. She lives with a man, and then one day one of his friends takes her out for dinner, somewhere expensive, and they drink a lot, and they both get carried away and then the next day she doesn't know what to tell her boyfriend \u2013 because she's a nice girl and she thinks he's nice too. But she tells him in case his friend does first. What a relief it is when he doesn't take it too badly. He even laughs and tells her these things happen. People get carried away. And then he leaves it for a while. The next thing is he says there's someone coming to town who needs looking after, and can she go out with him, so she does, and this time she gets a present. It won't be money for a long time, it'll be jewellery: a gold bracelet like the one that Vicki's got on downstairs. I've seen it. Later on, when she's got a bit more used to it, they'll start talking to her about money. A proper talk. It's because it's so gradual that it works. They're nice girls from Ruislip, their mums thought they ought to be fashion models, they don't want to know what they're really up to. I'm not talking about streetwalkers, but then neither are Kai and Tony. I'm not talking about those poor kids who're on the game by the time they're fourteen either. They're hooked on something they can't get any other way. They're no good for the clients who can really pay. They want something with class. But as for where it leaves you, it doesn't leave you anywhere. Not unless you want it to.'\n\n'How long have you known?'\n\n'I'm like you,' says Enid, and makes a small stabbing jump to fetch down the biscuit tin from its high shelf. 'I know things and I don't know them. And I watch what I ask, if I think I'm not going to like the answers.'\n\nShe doesn't care, thinks Nadine, and why should she? Kai's nothing to her, or Tony either. And what about me? Maybe she doesn't need me after all. I was the one who needed her. _'I must get back to Enid...; Oh, Enid's this old woman who lives up in our attic, she's amazing, really interesting to talk, to...;'_\n\n'You still haven't told me,' says Enid, 'what went on up in London.'\n\nIt's not a question. It's a space which Nadine can fill or not, as she chooses. Enid is putting out her best china cups, wiping them round with a cloth.\n\n'He reminded me of the Manchester Ladies,' says Nadine. 'He had a garden way up above London. Orange trees and tomatoes and little hedges. You'd never guess it was there.'\n\n'Who?'\n\n'The client.'\n\n'The one Tony took you to meet.'\n\n'Yes, but I didn't know. We had dinner, then Tony had to go off. I thought he was ill.'\n\n'A man like that's never ill unless he wants to be, you ought to know him better. Don't tell me, dear,' says Enid, holding up a traffic policeman's hand. 'Let me guess. You went back to his place for coffee.'\n\n'Yes, but it wasn't like that. He was really nice.'\n\n'What was he, then? Someone with money. Lucky I'm good at guessing. Merchant banker. Judge. Something in the city. Go on, give me a clue.'\n\n'You're getting warm.'\n\n'Tinker, tailor, soldier...; politician.'\n\n'Yes.'\n\n'They always are. Anyone famous?'\n\n'Paul Parrett.'\n\nIs that sly pride in Nadine's voice? Enid gives her a sharp look. _'Very_ discriminating,' she remarks.\n\n'I liked him.'\n\n'Well, that's all right, then, isn't it? You liked him, Tony's happy, Kai's happy, everyone's happy.'\n\n'I don't know why. He just seemed so alive.'\n\n'It's power that does it to them. It's like plugging them in to the grid every morning.'\n\n'No, it was the garden as well. He loved it.'\n\n'So what went wrong? You came shooting back fast enough. You must have been on the train by one o'clock. Not much time for love's young dream.'\n\n'I couldn't do what he wanted.'\n\n'Oh, dear.'\n\n'I wish I had now.'\n\n'That's only to spite your Kai.'\n\n'No \u2013 it was him wanting it so much \u2013 and it was awful, nearly \u2013 only not quite. And I could have made it all right.'\n\n'You can't turn it into your life's work, making things all right for a man like Paul Parrett. He won't have thought twice about it, you can be sure of that. He'd wipe you from his mind like wiping a blackboard.'\n\n'He gave me his number. He said I could reach him, and he'd get back to me.'\n\n'Ooh,' mocks Enid. 'Even though you didn't do what he wanted?'\n\n'Yes. I've got it in my bag.'\n\n'I'm surprised you didn't write it on your hand in biro, just to be sure,' says Enid. 'Well, that's something you'd better keep quiet, hadn't you, dear? Might be useful, though.' She pours the camomile tea and Nadine picks up her cup and sips. It's like drinking hay. It might as well be an infusion of the rushes from the floor. What does Enid think she's playing at? Witch, wise woman, secret-keeper with her herbs and her rushes and her tower room, watching and waiting. Making people talk to her. Nadine puts the tea down.\n\n'Don't you like it.'\n\n'I'm not feeling too good.'\n\nAnd she isn't. Lack of sleep, the glasses of wine drunk half a night ago, Paul Parrett's _petits fours,_ the smell of cigarettes, the sight of Kai's hand on Vicki's breast, all fight together in her stomach. The pain is sharp, like a seam of stitches being ripped open inside her. She leans forward. Her jaw aches with nausea.\n\n'Quick, Enid, I'm going to be sick.'\n\nIn a second a yellow plastic bucket is thrust under her head. Kai's bucket, she thinks muzzily, then the slow pulses of sickness speed up, join together and rise in her throat. She vomits up red meat, red wine, dark coffee, marzipan, the jogging of the train, Kai's dark-haired wrist on Vicki's tanned skin. A rush of sour yellow and brown vomit coats the bucket as Nadine retches. She is shaking so much she can't hold the rim of the bucket straight, and then Enid's holding it for her.\n\nIt's over. Her head is black inside, she's got to lie down. Enid's light dry hands guide her to the bed, and she lies back, her head singing, her eyes closed. She hears Enid say, 'Just going down to empty this...;' then the darkness in the room packs together and she lets herself go into it.\n\nWet cold on her forehead, water dripping down her face. She opens her eyes. It's Enid with a sopping flannel. The flannel isn't clean and the dripping water is musty. Nadine pushes it away.\n\n'Got any tissues?'\n\nEnid has brought up the toilet roll. Nadine wipes her face and hands, then lies still again. She can't possibly move. Her mind races. Enid's hand, like a crisp autumn leaf that's stayed on its twig against all the odds, strokes her forehead. It's nice.\n\n'Nice,' murmurs Nadine.\n\nEnid hoists herself up so that she's sitting by the girl.\n\n'You want to get some sleep.'\n\n'I can't sleep. I keep thinking of things. Everything's going too fast inside my head. Make me think about something else. I know. Tell me about Sukey and Caro. What happened.'\n\n'I'd have to think. I can't remember where we got to.'\n\n'Caro in the newspapers. _You do remember...;'_\n\n'All right, dear. Wait a minute. I've just had a thought. I've still got those sleeping tablets Dr Govind gave me. They don't go off, do they? I'll give you a couple, then you'll get a proper sleep.'\n\n'But you've got to tell me the story.'\n\nEnid finds the dusty brown tablet bottle and squints at the label. 'You ought to take three, I think,' she announces. Nadine swallows, lies down, shuts her eyes. Enid's voice begins to lull, sing-song.\n\n'Now where was I? You know Caro loved Sukey. And Sukey loved her too, in her way, but it wasn't Caro's way. It doesn't matter, they're both dead now. Sukey's been dead for more than fifty years, that's a long time. Caro didn't die then, of course. They even let her out of prison in the end. Her hair wasn't red any more, it was grey. I went to see her come out. There's only one way out, so you can watch if you want to. She didn't notice me. There was someone with her, a young woman in a fur coat. People still wore fur coats then, when Caro came out of prison. I wouldn't have recognized Caro. She came scuttling out with her head down, but nobody was waiting. Only me, and I was walking towards the gate, as if I was going into the prison. She didn't notice me. All Caro's family had a lot of money. And Sukey's too. I put flowers on Sukey's grave the day before Caro came out. I put my name on them, so Caro would see when she came. I knew she wouldn't be able to keep away from Sukey's grave. It would be the nearest she could get to her. I could just picture her rolling about on the ground and crying, digging her nails into the earth. She'll been waiting twenty years to do it, after all. And Caro never had any dignity.\n\n'Oh, I still hated her, but you can't go on hating someone after they're dead. Not so easily. Once I knew Caro was dead it was like a light being switched off. But I still loved Sukey. You can love people after they're dead.\n\n'Are you still awake? Are you listening? I'll tell you something. It was my fault. If it hadn't been for me, Sukey wouldn't have died, not then. If one single thing had been different.\n\n'Caro killed her, you know. She beat Sukey's brains out with a poker. Then Sukey couldn't think about me any more. That's what she thought. She would beat everything that tormented her out of Sukey's head. But she beat out the sweetness too. All the honey in the comb. What did she think was going to be left?\n\n'Oh, yes, it was in all the papers. They wouldn't have made as much fuss if it'd happened to a girl like me. But Caro wouldn't have killed me. She didn't love me enough. There's lots more but I'm tired. Are you listening, dear?'\n\nWhat a mess. What a mess. Fancy seeing the pair of them in bed downstairs. Nadine's too young to know about his type. He's always reminded me of Mr Albion; funny, considering I never even saw Mr Albion. That Vicki's well suited to him. If Nadine's got any sense she'll leave him to Vicki.\n\nEnid squints down at Nadine. Her head has fallen sideways and her mouth is open. Her skin is very pale, with a sheen of sweat on it. Her eye-sockets are stained dark brown. Enid can hardly hear her breathing. She leans close. Yes, it's all right. She's breathing. The pills have worked. Fine spikes of dark hair stick to Nadine's forehead. She looks like a sick and ugly child. You'd never believe this was the girl in the white dress who came in to pose for Enid before the taxi arrived to take her and Tony to the station. She looks lost. More fool her if she's been expecting Kai to take care of her. Her family don't sound much good, but then who knows what went on there? Maybe they didn't like the look of Kai. And who could blame them.\n\nSuddenly Nadine turns, seizes a fistful of blanket and burrows her head into the pillow, face down. Only the top of her head can be seen. Past four o'clock. Not long now till it starts to get light. Better try and get some sleep while I'm waiting. Waiting for what?\n\n## _Eighteen_\n\nEnid doesn't sleep. She curls herself on top of the bedclothes next to Nadine. It's warm enough for her. She can't stop thinking of Kai and that woman cuddled up together downstairs, dangerous as a couple of Alsatians. You can't tame them, they're always half wolf. They revert. Watch that light in their eyes as they pad back to the forest. What does Nadine think she's playing at? She's seen Vicki sleeping with Kai in her own bed, but what does she imagine is going to happen in the morning? She doesn't even try. She vomits it all up, and then she sleeps. She's only got a few hours left. She ran away from Paul Parrett, that's clear, though he seemed to like her well enough.\n\n'You don't want to get on the wrong side of a man like that,' Enid tells sleeping Nadine. 'You've made a fool of him, and of Tony and Kai too. To crown it all you go and ruin a silk dress which must have cost hundreds of pounds. Daft ha'p'orth. It'll be fit for the rag-bag now. It's a pity you ran off. You could have made something of yourself there. A man like that's got connections. Influence. And he doesn't want trouble. If you treat him right, he'll treat you right. There's enough newspapers waiting for a sniff of scandal. He knows all you have to do is pick up the telephone, so he'll make sure you've no cause to. He's got more to lose than you have, dear. He doesn't want you selling your story to the Daily Whatsit.\n\n'Trouble is, he's got too much to lose. He gave you his telephone number, did he? I hope you weren't fool enough to give him yours. We don't want any callers here. We've had enough of all that, what with your Kai and Tony and their business friends. You didn't see the friends who came along to get rid of Jenny and the rest of them. No. You missed that. Well, they weren't a pretty sight. As for taking the baby out of its cot and dangling it over the banisters, that was just a joke. Jenny didn't seem to get it, though. Ever so upset she was. They told her they didn't think this house was a safe place for a baby. Too many railings missing. 'Course they didn't know I was listening. Jenny stood there, she didn't dare move. One of them had the baby by the feet. He had both the baby's feet together in one hand, the way you'd hold a chicken. He swung him very gently, out over the banisters. The baby was purple, screaming. I'll never forget the sound Jenny made. Like she was being strangled. She was yelling before, saying she was going, she wouldn't even pack, she'd never come back. But they wanted to make sure.\n\n'He gave the baby back to her. He couldn't even cry any more, he just jerked about in Jenny's arms.\n\n'Oh, your Kai wasn't there, don't worry. He wouldn't want to be mixed up in anything nasty like that. He came back later, when they'd all gone. The way that baby screamed. But then you might say it was always screaming.\n\n'I'd've gone for the police, but you can't, can you? If you do, it'll be your turn next. And the police wouldn't pay any attention to an old woman like me. Not if your Kai was standing there in his nice clothes. _\"My sitting tenant. Yes, they know her well down at the Prince and Pauper. A bit of a troublemaker when she's bad a few. Noisy too.\"_ Oh, they'd be on his side fast enough. They know a nuisance when they see one and they're trained not to take too much notice of old women making wild allegations. And I wouldn't fancy your chances against the word of a government minister, dear. They have to stick together, it's their job.'\n\nIt's been a long, long time since anyone turned to Enid for help. Yes, Jenny screamed out her name, but she'd have called for anyone. She must have known Enid couldn't come down and interfere. After all, Enid lived there. Sometimes, when someone needs you, it makes you hate them. You shut your door and turn the wireless on loud so as not to hear the cries.\n\nA bit late to shut the door now, Enid tells herself tartly, when you've let her into your bed. You could say she's not a kid, she's sixteen past. Old enough to know what she's got herself into. No one ever asked her to come here. She walked into it with her eyes open. Anyone could see what kind of man Kai was. The girls these days know everything. They're not like we were. I didn't know anything, till Sukey taught me.\n\nSukey. 'Oh, darling, you're not _washing_ those frightful rags, are you? Sweetheart, you don't need to do that. It's exactly like the Dark Ages. I'll buy them for you every month if you can't afford them.' She was always giving me things. And it was so easy to take from Sukey. It didn't make any difference. She never wanted anything back. Besides, she must have known she had everything already.\n\nEnid scrambles sideways and slips down under the bedclothes next to Nadine. She puts her arms around Nadine and pulls her close.\n\nOn the white rumpled surface of the bed the old woman takes the sleeping girl into her arms. She has been waiting such a long time for her. She whimpers and covers the young smooth cold face with kisses, not minding the smell of sour breath. For more than fifty years she has been far out on the ice, waiting. Here is the head: she strokes it feverishly. It is not caved in, not disfigured, not blazing with flies. Here is the hair, short and feathery and fashionable, not matted with blood. Here are the eye-sockets, wet with tears, not empty and unseeing. The finegrained skin is not torn and battered. The body smells of sweat and stale wine and perfume, not like the entrance to a butcher's shop. The flesh is cold but she can bring it back to life. This time she will not turn her back. This time she will warm, she will warn, she will protect.\n\n'Darling,' she whispers, 'darling.'\n\nNadine sleeps, her face against Enid's old parched neck. Her smooth skin touches Enid's, which is crazed like a desert, trenched with dry rivers. Enid is small, but she is powerful. Her balding skull is packed with stories of survival. She's been alive so long, she knows everything about staying alive.\n\n'Go to sleep, dear,' murmurs Enid. 'Go back to sleep.'\n\nThe ice is cold, so cold nothing human can sleep on it without drifting seamlessly into the drowse of hypothermia, then death. The wind sings across the frozen sea, and the snow-woman walks away contented, to the place where she belongs. She doesn't feel the sting of the snow, or the crusted ice under her feet. She has got her child back in her arms.\n\nThe house is empty but for the sleeping wolves, Enid in her room, and Nadine. What are they going to do in the morning? Will that woman have the sense to leave? Or will she hang on for a slow breakfast and the newspapers in bed, knowing that Nadine's in London and can't possibly be back yet? What if Nadine sees them through the door, all toast crumbs and crumpled sheets, handing one another bits of the newspaper? Even worse than seeing them at it. I wonder if Caro ever saw us. I suppose I'll always wonder. She had the key to Sukey's house all the time. We'd never have known if she'd crept in one afternoon when at last we'd fallen asleep. She'll have seen the stains where we'd rolled on the grapes we kept dropping on the sheets. Sukey used to drop them into my mouth, but she always missed. Purple stains, drying to brown, like blood. The wistaria tapping on the glass, and Caro looking, looking, then going away without saying a word. And I saw nothing. I knew nothing. The monkey again. Why didn't Sukey change the lock, or put a bolt on her door? None of it might have happened. The trouble was, she never used her imagination about Caro. She was careless. Just the way Kai's been careless, bringing that woman here.\n\nEnid strokes Nadine's cheek. She's not even pretty any more. Certainly not beautiful. No competition for that one he's got downstairs. Enid looks at her clock. It's nearly six. It's not going to be a nice day today; she can tell from the quality of light coming through the thick dark curtains. They said on the news last night there'd be scattered showers. Nadine's undrunk cup of camomile tea has an oily film on it.\n\n'I'll make her some proper tea when she wakes up. She'll want something. She looks washed out. Bugger it,' she remembers, 'I finished the milk last night.'\n\nEnid has to buy her milk fresh every day, or it goes off. The all-night shop at Texaco will be open. She gets her milk there. Quietly, Enid dresses in her narrow black slacks and a pink Oxfam jumper, crams her beret on her head. Not a sound from Nadine; well, let her sleep it off. Pound coins, raffia shopping-bag, front-door key. An adventure. And someone to come back to and tell all about it. It must be like this all the time when you live with people. Nadine is deep down in the bedclothes, almost invisible. Only the dark top of her head shows. Very gently, Enid eases the doorknob round and sets off down the stairs. Nothing moves.\n\n## _Nineteen_\n\nVicki and Kai wake up comfortably. Vicki doesn't like sex in the morning: she's funny that way, always has been. What she likes is a pot of really hot fresh tea \u2013 Indian, none of your China or Earl Grey muck, a jug of silver-top milk and four digestive biscuits. Yes, she knows they're full of calories, but what the hell. She never eats breakfast, and she's going to the gym later on, with Lila. And Kai, give him his due, does make a really good cup of tea. She nudges him with her elbow, and when he groans sleepy protest she digs hard into the fleshy covering of his ribs. He rolls over.\n\n'That's the way,' she says, satisfied. 'I thought I was going to have to wait all morning for you to wake up.'\n\nHe gropes for his watch on the floor beside the bed. 'Jesus, Vick, it's only quarter past six.'\n\n'Yes, but you've got a lot on today, haven't you? Big day. Besides \u2013' She doesn't go on, but he knows she's thinking of the morning train back from London, with a bleary Nadine on it. Vicki handles his relationship with Nadine as she has handled all his relationships with other women. Her tact is perfect. It's as if he's suffering from an illness which will run an entirely predictable course, known only to Vicki. She does insist that Kai wears a condom, but that's fair enough. These days, as Vicki says, you can't be too careful. You never know where people have been. Nadine moving into the house must have been a blow to her, but she kept quiet about that too. Vicki had liked the look of the house herself, and had had plans for interior decoration. She'll come to look round the empty shell with him, and he'd known what she wanted. Nothing was said. Vicki was never one to make trouble, that's why she had lasted all these years with Kai. She just mentioned what she'd do with this room or that, and of course Vicki had a real eye for colour, you had to give it to her. If you liked that sort of thing.\n\n'I know it's nothing to do with me,' remarks Vicki now, obliquely, 'but I still can't help wondering if you ought to of chosen plain brass. Lacquered is nicer.' Kai doesn't reply. His urge to stay in bed curled up against Vicki's neat brown flanks fights his need to pee. And then if he gets up he'll have to make her tea...; He groans again and swings his legs over the side of the bed, stands up, yawns hugely and scratches himself under the arms.\n\n'Good boy,' says Vicki, snuggling back into her pillow. 'Do you get the paper delivered?'\n\n'I'll go down the corner for you,' he says with conscious magnanimity. _'Daily Mail?'_\n\n'That's right.' She huffs her breath against a hand held near to her mouth. 'Ugh! Ponky! Got any mouthwash, Kai?'\n\n'I don't know. Nadine might...; I'll look in the bathroom.'\n\n'That bathroom! I don't know how you can stand it, you and Nadine,' she says, her eyes sparkling at him maliciously. He stops scratching and just stands there, looking at her.\n\n'This room's still a bit ponky too,' she says, wrinkling up her nose. 'Smells like cat to me.'\n\n'There were cats in here.'\n\n'My God, must have been those squatters. Some people live like animals. I suppose you had to get rid of them.'\n\n'Yeah \u2013 most of them were only kittens, so there was no problem.'\n\n'Oooh, Kai! Poor little things,' says Vicki perfunctorily, scrabbling under the pillow for a comb.\n\n'You wouldn't say that if you'd seen them. They tore my arms to bits. And they could swim too. I thought they were supposed to drown straight away.'\n\n'Of course they can swim! You put them in a bag of stones or something, if you want to drown them.'\n\n'I bought a bucket with a lid on it, and after a bit they stopped making a noise. But then I took the lid off and they were swimming round and round with just their mouths above the water. They looked like little rats. So I poured all the water out in the backyard and they lay there like those cartoons when the cat gets run over. Flat and skinny. I had to hit them on the back of the head with a stone. They were hard to kill. They wouldn't stop jerking.'\n\n'You ought to take up your squash again,' she remarks, looking at him appraisingly while she combs her hair, 'they've got ever such a good new coach at the health club. Tony's been taking lessons, did he tell you? You've got to keep yourself in shape for a young girl like Nadine. You won't forget my digestives, will you, when you go round the shop?'\n\n'O\u039a, OK.'\n\nKai stumps out of the room, genitals swinging. Probably off to take a bath first, Vicki thinks, that man's mad about washing. Still, it's nice, when you consider what some men are like. Real shockers.\n\nKai lifts the bathroom door to one side. He must get it fixed: perhaps this weekend, if Tony's going to be around to help. The smell hits him. Jesus. That woman. Holding his breath, nostrils pinched and angry, he crosses the room. The toilet bowl is streaked with vomit. It hasn't been flushed at all and a curded mass of vomit rolls and floats in the water. The seat is spattered. By the toilet there's a stained yellow plastic bucket. He stands still and swears. It's that old witch again. Too drunk to get upstairs, so she has to do it here. Too drunk to clean up after herself. If Nadine'd been here she'd have cleared it up. She thinks I don't notice the way she scurries round after the old bitch. Next thing the old woman will be shitting herself and peeing herself and expecting us to clean it up. Jesus. They expect you to get rid of rats and mice but a filthy old woman is something else. She must be looked after.\n\n'Oh, no, Mr Toivanen, I'm afraid Miss Shelton is a protected tenant.' Satan take her and her shit where they belong. Nadine's not here now for her to hide behind. If Nadine wasn't so soft I'd have got rid of her months ago. She's nothing but an animal, bringing her filth and diseases into the house. But this time she won't get away with it. Half past six. She'll be up there sleeping it off. Right. She's going to get a waking-up she won't forget.\n\nHe can't bring himself to pee into the filth of the toilet bowl. He's not going to flush it either, not before he's rubbed her face in it. He goes downstairs into the bedroom, pulls on jeans and sandals. Vicki glances at him, but his face is averted. From the look of him, there's trouble.\n\n'Going down the shop now?'\n\n'No. The drain's blocked, I have to fix it. Don't go in the bathroom yet.'\n\nWouldn't you know it? This house. Something ought to be done about the plumbing. She'll take a shower when she gets back to her own place. She doesn't trust the bath here. You never know who's been using it \u2013 that dirty old woman upstairs, for one.\n\nKai goes down to the yard and pees into the main drain. It stinks too. He'll swill Jeyes Fluid down it later. You can't get anything clean in this house. He's beginning to regret buying it. If he'd known about the old woman, he would never have bought it. She's bad luck. As he zips up his jeans, he sees a piece of piping in the corner of the yard. Dull zinc grey, a yard long. Tony was using it to lever off the old taps on the bath. It ought to be put away. Kai picks it up. It might be useful for fixing the drains.\n\nHe goes up through the house with fast furious steps as far as the bathroom, turns on the cold bath-tap, then leaves it running so that Vicki will think he is clearing the drain. He climbs the last flight to Enid's attic with quiet elastic steps. He's never counted the steps before. There are fourteen of them, twisting to her door. Her door. Why should she live here in his house? What law allows her? Maybe she thinks he is nice, like Nadine. Maybe she thinks he'll put up with anything. But she's gone too far. This time he'll show her. You try to make a place decent, you work hard, you spend money. She needs to be taught a lesson.\n\nKai moves lightly now, for a powerful man. His hand is delicate on the doorknob. The only doorknob in the whole house, and the old witch has it. He squeezes it as if he will make blood run from it. He turns it and it responds with a light oiled click. This is going to be easy. The door slips wide.\n\nIt's dark in the room. She's got the curtains drawn. There's the bed. It smells in here too. Old stale air, nothing washed, nothing clean. How long is it since those windows have been open? And the smell of vomit is in here too, fainter but unmistakable. There she is. Drunk and snoring in the middle of her bed, with the covers pulled right over her. Like a rat in its nest. Breathing in her own stink. That's her shape under the bedclothes, curled up. Feet, backside, shoulders. Head. All tucked down and snoring. She'll sleep for hours yet if he let her. What a life for an old woman.\n\nHe looks away, around the fouled room. Everything cluttered, dirty, untidy. Yes, it's like having an animal in the house. Not a human being at all. There ought to be laws to get rid of such people, not laws to protect them. Oh, she's an old woman, is she? She's got nowhere to go? Then she's lived too long.\n\nHe notices that he's brought the piping up with him. Now it's heavy. A bit rough in his hands. Grainy. He swings it, just a little.\n\nThey're out of milk at the Texaco garage when Enid arrives. But the milkman will be along soon, the assistant tells her, folding back the pages of his Terry Pratchett. She waits. It's nice having shops that stay open all night long. If you go out, you know you'll find someone to talk to, even if it's only to ask for a box of matches or a loaf. Not that she wants to talk now. Save it for later, when Nadine wakes up. There'll be plenty to talk about then. What a bloody mess. The assistant looks up at her. She must have said something aloud.\n\n'Must be a long night for you,' she offers companionably. Look, I'm normal just like you.\n\n'Oh, it doesn't bother me. I like reading, see. And now we've got the automatic doors you can keep trouble out when you see it coming.'\n\nEnid nods agreement. A good citizen, she is, on the side of Texaco against trouble.\n\n'Here he comes. You didn't have long to wait,' says the assistant. He lays the book face down and goes to help pack the cartons of milk into the fridges. Enid selects two, and waits. She's in no hurry. Something else, perhaps, to make a nice breakfast for Nadine? She looks around the racks for inspiration. American blackcurrant muffins. Sounds interesting. The assistant returns to his desk, tots up Enid's purchases and offers a plastic bag.\n\n'They nice, are they?' he asks, indicating the muffins.\n\n'I've never tried them before. It's for a friend. A little treat. She's staying with me.' He nods, cautious in case she gets talking, and gives change. Enid goes out, saying goodbye separately to the assistant and to the milkkman, and trots away across the forecourt with her shopping. It's no distance back to the house. Just a nice walk. And the day's perfect. New-made, grey and cool. Much better than all that sun they've been having lately. It'll brighten up later, you can tell. Only a few cars about, and no one else walking. A young boy on a paper round skims by on his bicycle, hurls a paper over a hedge and skims on. Well. Enid's surprised anyone puts up with that. Papers just dumped on the front path, even if they are wrapped in plastic. It must be some new American fashion. All Americans are mad about speed. It's like a disease with them. A good strong cup of tea, and then the muffins. That'll settle her stomach. Then we'll talk.\n\nThe birds aren't frightened this time of the morning. Sparrows pecking and fluttering nearly under my feet. Swallows'll be going home soon. Think of them going all that way. And knowing where to go. We think we know a lot of things, but we don't know as much as a swallow. Those swifts were making patterns round the house last night. Cutting the air with their wings. Imagine going on and on, flying, never stopping to sleep. They even mate on the wing, apparently. Oh, it's been a beautiful summer. Never mind the flies in the ointment. And then there's autumn to look forward to. This year I'll try beech leaves in glycerine again. It makes a lovely decoration. Those rushes weren't much of a success. I shan't try that again.\n\nEnid tiptoes up through the house. She doesn't want to risk waking those buggers up before their time. Let sleeping dogs lie. Even when she's past the bedroom and on to her own stairs she makes sure no one can hear a footfall. At the top the door's open. Funny. Nadine must have woken up. She ought to've slept for hours yet, with those tablets. Still, perhaps it's as well.\n\nIt's not a sound or a movement that alerts Enid. It's a change in the shadows: some bulk where it shouldn't be. She stands at her threshold, slowly makes sense of the broad blocking back of Kai, bent over her bed, his hand with something in it, stirring, starting to swing.\n\nShe could get away. Back down the stairs. He hasn't seen her.\n\n_'Why, Caro, darling,'_ comes Sukey's voice, protesting, humorous, not yet afraid. And then the black hiss of the poker.\n\n'Look behind you,' quavers Enid, singsong.\n\nHe swivels, fast as a heavy man can be fast when he wants, and sees her. What does he think he sees? The ghost of her, to judge from his colour. Better make things clear in case he goes and does something silly.\n\n'It's not me in the bed,' she whispers. 'It's your Nadine.'\n\nShe's never seen a bull charge but it must be like this. He runs at her and she's lifted with him, the butt of it thwacking out her breath. The air is tearing around her: everything's so fast, so much stronger than her. Suddenly he's close, his breath in her face, his eyes glaring at something she wants to say isn't in her, isn't here at all. But she has no breath. He's got her, she's in the air, lifted high by his arms so her feet dabble against the floor. For an overwhelming second she's a child again, flooded with it, helpless. Her mouth creaks but it won't scream or talk. She sees her doorknob whip past, her heavy door, and then he hurls and she flies but she doesn't know where she's going as the air hisses in the white downpour of her falling.\n\nBefore the fall there wasn't any noise at all. Barely a scuffle. When she fell it made a sound like a broom falling down inside a cupboard. A small, dull sound. Now there's only one person on the stairs. He looks down at the sprawled figure beneath him. It's all wrong. The geometry of arms and legs isn't right. That's not how a head goes. Not even a child would draw it like that. Gently, he goes down the stairs towards it. She has fallen face down but with her chin touching the floor in a way which shouldn't be possible. There seems to be some movement going on in her mouth still. Her eyes are open but they are not looking at him, and anyway they certainly don't recognize anybody. A little bit more sound, a sad chuffing noise, then silence. It was air coming out of her lungs, not real breathing. Jesus. Nadine. What if she's woken? He listens, but all he can hear is the cold water running into the bath. Vicki, stay in the bedroom. Drains are difficult things.\n\nThe piping. Where did he put it down? Cat-light, he mounts the stairs again. He's getting sick of going up and down them. It's surprising she wanted to stay here withall these stairs. The old woman in her big, dirty bed. The black top of Nadine's head. What is Nadine doing here? She should be in London. Really she's got to be more careful, she might have got hurt. No. This isn't the time to think about it. Let her sleep. He stiffens, listens. No sound from upstairs. She hasn't woken.\n\nStepping carefully over Enid, he goes down to the bathroom and turns off the tap. For a moment it feels hard to move again, but he manages it. Once he gets going, it's easy. He goes on down to the bedroom.\n\n'Vick.'\n\n'Got it fixed, have you?'\n\n'Vick, there's been an accident.'\n\nShe looks up sharply, measures his expression, gets purposefully out of bed and pulls on her neat white lycra panties and bra. 'Chuck me over my top, Kai, would you?' A minute later she's dressed. 'Right. Is this something I want to know about?' she asks.\n\n'The old lady fell.'\n\n_Lady,_ notes Vicki. Never heard her called that before.\n\n'Let me have a look at her. I did do my first aid, you know.'\n\n'She doesn't want any first aid, Vicki.'\n\nShe sits, straightens, stares. 'Oh, my God,' she says.\n\n'You better get right out of here.'\n\n'OK.' Her fingers crisp the duvet frill, squeeze it convulsively, let go. 'Are you sure?' she asks.\n\n'Yeah. You look yourself if you want to.'\n\n'No, thanks.' She shudders. 'You're right. I'm getting out of here.'\n\nHe stands in the doorway, big and heavy and dark. He's in her way. Poor old Kai. Why did this have to go and happen? It's the house. You always get trouble in a place like this. She's never liked the atmosphere.\n\n'Listen,' she says. 'You come over to my place. You've got to go careful. It's the shock.'\n\n'No,' he says, shaking his head. 'There's things to do here. Police.'\n\n'You don't want to go getting the police,' she says automatically. 'What've they got to do with it? Get the doctor.'\n\nHe thinks of the doctor. He thinks of bruises, marks. Postmortems. He sees Vicki from a long way off. He needs to be alone. He needs space to think.\n\n'You go,' he says. 'I'll come later.'\n\nHe doesn't need to urge Vicki. She's already crowding her things into her overnight case, smoothing the duvet.\n\n'You will change the sheets, won't you? Don't forget, now. Or shall I do it before I go?'\n\n'No,' he says. 'You better go, before something else happens.'\n\nShe is quick and deft, at the doorway already, yellow-pale under her tan, bag in hand.\n\n'Phone me,' she says. 'Soon as you get it sorted out.'\n\n'Yeah,' he says, but it's no good. There's no time for any of that now. She's going. She wants out. Thank God, Vick's the type who'll keep her mouth shut.\n\nThe click of the front door behind Vicki releases him. Things to do. First, something to cover his hands. He'll never cram them into Nadine's rubber gloves. Two tea-towels will do. He wraps them round his hands, fetches the length of piping from the bathroom and replaces it carefully in the backyard. Fingerprints, A flash of heat goes through him. He washes, rubs, dries the piping, dirties it again with dirt from the green-coated brick walls, tugs forward a wreath of ivy. The piping looks as if it's been there for ever. He looks at the digital clock in the kitchen. A new second bubbles up on its plastic display. It is 7:11 and 23 seconds. 24. 25. The sky is clearing and it's going to be sunny again after all. Kai jerks away. The tea-towels are coming loose and they've got dirt on them. He binds them tighter.\n\nThe hall and stairway are filling with early sun. Later, he'll take Nadine her coffee. No. The gentle sun hasn't wiped away anything. More things to do. At the bottom of the attic stairs she'll still be there, the old woman, awkwardly folded together. A bag of dirt and blood. Face half turned from her, he feels for her and gathers the dense, heavy body. It flops, rolls out of his grasp. He fixes the tea-towels tight and spoons his arms under the body. Holding in his breath, he carries Enid through to the empty room next to the bathroom. The spare room, Nadine calls it. He lays the body on bare boards behind the door, curled as it was at the foot of the stairs, and shuts the door. He breathes out.\n\nThere's a stain at the bottom of the stairs. He will need mop and bucket. First, he'll have to clean the bathroom. Have it all clean before Nadine wakes up. The clotted vomit is hard to shift with cold water, but he daren't use the geyser and wake Nadine. He fills and empties the yellow bucket, swills the sides of the lavatory, scrubs it with the brush. The smell is awful. A small sound seeps out of his mouth. He gags.\n\nThe bathroom is clean. The boards are clean. Now, the towels. He hesitates, then goes down to the kitchen again, finds a plastic rubbish bag, drops in the tea-towels and seals them with a wire tie. He carries the bag upstairs to the bedroom, where he slides a leather suitcase from under the bed and tucks the rubbish bag into its corner. He leaves the suitcase lying open on the bed.\n\nHe makes coffee, and thin white toast with Marmite for Nadine. He butters it carefully so that there will be no lumps of melting butter on the toast. She doesn't like them. He heats her milk and pours it into a jug, puts two big cups and the toast on a tray and carries it up all the stairs, spreading the fragrance of coffee and fresh toast through the empty house. The smell of coffee often wakes Nadine. He wants her to wake up now. He wants someone to talk to.\n\n'Nadine. Nadine.' He puts down the tray, pulls back Enid's curtains, opens a dirty window. It shudders in its frame. 'Nadine!' He pounces at the bed, suddenly frightened. He can't hear her breathing.\n\nBut when he tears the covers back he feels her warmth. She groans and twists away from the light. He shakes her shoulder. 'Nadine! Nadine! Wake up!'\n\nGroaning, white and puffy-eyed, she wakes. Her eyes are bewildered slits against the light. She doesn't know where she is. Slowly he sees everything come back to her as she looks round Enid's room, taking it in.\n\n'Oh, God, I feel terrible.'\n\n'Drink your coffee.'\n\nHe holds the cup carefully under her mouth so she can sip. She drinks it with her eyes shut, holding her head as if it hurts her. When half the coffee is gone she flops back on the pillow. Her eyes are clear, narrow, accusing.\n\n'Has she gone?'\n\n'She's gone into town. I met her going out,' he says steadily.\n\n'I don't mean Enid. I mean that woman. Vicki. Has she gone, or is she still in my bed?'\n\nJesus. Vick. At once knows what she has seen.\n\n'I thought it would be a nice surprise for you when I came back early,' says Nadine.\n\n'I made you toast. It will get cold,' he says stupidly. His head rings. What does she know \u2013 what does she not know?\n\n'I'm going to get washed,' says Nadine.\n\n'Darling\u2013'\n\n'No. I'm going to get washed. I need a bath, really.'\n\nShe gets out of bed very carefully, holding on to the bedstead. Her dress is rucked and spoiled. She pulls it over her head, drops it to the floor, kicks it aside and steps unsteadily towards the door.\n\n'Be careful! You'll fall.'\n\nKai follows Nadine down the stairs, watches her bare feet pad down each stair, follows her into the bathroom. She bends down, rinsing the bathtub with cold water, then lights the geyser pilot. It coughs, roars into flame and begins to spurt white-hot water.\n\n'I can never get this bloody thing right. I wish Enid was back, she's much better with it.'\n\nShe leaves the bath to fill and bends over the washbasin, scrubbing fiercely at her teeth. When she stands up again, she turns dizzy and catches at Kai's arm. 'Go and make me some more coffee, Kai. I feel awful. Enid gave me some sleeping-pills.'\n\nOnce he's out of the room she feels better. She runs in cold water and steps into the bath. The hot clean bath feels delicious. She'll wash her hair. It smells of trains and drinks and stale nights. She'll wash it all away.\n\nWhen Kai carries in the coffee, she's lying in the bath, her back arched, dipping her hair. She puts out a wet hand for the cup and he sits on the dirty-linen basket by the bath. He watches her tensed, bare body, streaming with water, the stomach muscles flat and tight under her skin, her breasts going shallow. How young she is. His hands remember the dead weight of Enid. Nadine sits up, pours shampoo into the palm of her hand and massages it into her hair.\n\n'I'll move out,' she says, shampooing hard.\n\n'But why \u2013 there's no need for you to do that. Vick's a friend, an old friend, that's all. There's nothing in it.'\n\nShe stares straight out at him from under her cap of white bubbles. 'A friend,' she levels at him.\n\nHe puts his hand on the side of the bath. It is trembling. He watches it, watches her noticing it.\n\n'Darling Nadine, she is a friend. She is one my business friends, you know that. She should not make you unhappy.'\n\nHis English slips, making her tender. Or does he know it works like that? She glances at him sharply.\n\n'I am sorry,' he says. 'I love you.'\n\nThere's sweat on his forehead. He looks very ill \u2013 why didn't she notice that before? His fingers are tight on the rim of the bath.\n\n'You aren't well, Kai,' she says. 'It's all this running around. It's destroying everything.'\n\n'Yeah,' he says eagerly. 'Yeah, you're right. This business is killing me. Let's go away, Nadine.'\n\nHis words pour through her, sweet as victories. He has never looked at her like this before. There's something seriously wrong and he's confiding in her, not Vicki. Maybe he's telling the truth, there was nothing in it, just two old friends and too much to drink. He looks \u2013 frightened. She thinks of the wads of new money, the phone calls, the men Enid talked about, the ones who got rid of the squatters. Business. If things aren't going well, he might have good reason to be frightened.\n\n'Darling Nadine, why don't we go away now? Straight away? We can go to my country. I know a place there. Just us together. We can pack and go today. Tony'll look after things here.'\n\nShe pats the lather on her hair, thinking. Time for ourselves. Time to be together. Just us. Darling Nadine. Her veins are warm with his words. And if we have time together we can sort things out. All that business in London \u2013 Tony \u2013 Paul Parrett \u2013 we can talk about it.\n\n'I'll take you to my friend's summer-house, Nadine. We can stay as long as we like. We can go now \u2013 we can go today. Say you'll come.'\n\nHe doesn't touch her, but he leans close, his face closing out the world, full of hunger. Of course she'll come.\n\n'But won't we need a lot of things? What about tickets? Do I need a visa?'\n\nHe shrugs, relaxing. 'We've got money. What else d'you need?' A touch of the old Kai.\n\n'Right.' She leans back and sloshes water on to her hair. 'Did Enid say what time she was coming back? I'll have to say goodbye to her.'\n\nShe'd been going to talk to Enid. But Enid's never liked Kai. Nadine knows what she's going to say, and knows she doesn't want to hear it now. The frowsty night, the witchy secrecy of Enid's room: her clear statements; her stories; that stretching memory; no, Nadine doesn't want any of that now.\n\n'You know what she's like,' says Kai. 'She'll have wandered off somewhere. She might not be back all day.'\n\nNadine frowns. It seems odd that Enid's gone off like this, but never mind. 'I'll get ready. You go and pack.'\n\nHe smiles, kisses her wet head and goes out. Joy rises in her, coming from nowhere. As long as she doesn't look outside the frame of now, she's safe. Concentrate on now. Clean hair, clean jeans and top, leather jacket. Her face looks exactly the same as it usually does in the mornings. No one would guess all that had happened the night before. They are going away, she and Kai, the two of them. No Tony, no Vicki, no house, no cinema, no business. Only Kai and a wad of new money that will fly them through the air, fill them with food, whisk them into taxis, hire them cars. All they'll hear will be the noise of money making things happen.\n\nThey stand outside the house with their two expensive leather bags at their feet. The sun is warm and gay on the steps and pavement, but already there's a crisp edge to it. Autumn's on its way. The plane trees above them rustle. Kai has ordered a taxi and it'll be here in a minute.\n\n'Fuck,' says Kai. 'I forgot to write a note to Tony.'\n\n'You could ring from the airport.'\n\n'No. I must leave him a contact number in Helsinki.'\n\nShe doesn't question anything. She stands in the sun, drinking in the air which tastes like cider, smiling dreamily downwards and watching for the taxi to appear round the corner of the square.\n\nKai walks past the notepad and pen by the telephone, leaps up the stairs to the spare room and opens the door. She is still there. He grips the body under buttocks and shoulders and carts it out to the landing. Looking up the attic stairs, he gauges the angle of fall. He can't remember exactly how she lay. Now he has to look at her: the nodding flopping head, the skinny shoulders. And yet there seems so much of her. He puts her down at the foot of the stairs and begins to arrange her, hands forward, foot skewed to one side. She still moves quite easily: she hasn't started to stiffen up yet. There's something dark dribbling out of her nose. It smears the back of his hand and he wipes it off frantically, then steps back. She seems to subside a little, like an artist's model relaxing into her pose. He backs off, goes into the bathroom and washes his hands hard, turning them over and over, applying soap to each finger. Then he leaves the bathroom and goes down the stairs without looking at Enid, though he can't quite get the shape of her out of the corner of his eye. It's like something lodged there.\n\nThe breeze is blowing up Nadine's freshly washed hair. She waves to him, points to the taxi turning at the corner and backing to their kerb. She picks up her bag, but he takes it from her and smiles, opening the taxi door, pushing in their bags, letting Nadine step in first. The taxi whirls them away on its practised wheels, and the last thing he sees is the sun glinting on his shut front door before they leave it all behind.\n\n## _Twenty_\n\nSo here we are. Here I am, alone with Kai, the way I always wanted to be. There is no telephone and nobody will call. It's eight o'clock in the morning, cool and quiet. Here, autumn is coming fast. When we left England it was late summer and the air was warm. It was months since I'd needed to put on a jacket or a thick jersey. Now I'm wearing a cable-knit oiled wool jumper which Kai found packed away in a wooden chest in the bedroom here. It's all right for me to wear it, he says \u2013 this is just old stuff which the Linnas keep here all year round. A couple of heavy jerseys, two pairs of waterproof trousers, a pair of fisherman's waders, a long coat. It was all neatly folded and the clothes smelled of pinewood as we shook them out. I pulled the big jersey on over my leggings and wondered what the people were like who last wore these clothes. The jerseys had been washed before they were put away. The Linnas were old friends of Kai, he said, but he hadn't seen much of them for years. Matti was a teacher and Marja was a paediatric nurse. Good people. Kai knew Matti when they were students. Marja probably bent down, filling the chest, while the children skipped round the veranda waving the buckets they'd been told to put in the car. There's a photo of the children on the wall. Their skin is smoothly tanned and their hair is white.\n\nThe summer-house was packed up for the winter when we arrived. Matti and Marja wouldn't be coming back until spring. The place looked as if it had been put to bed, to sleep for months under the snow. We drove for hours and hours to get here. We'd flown from London to Helsinki and spent the night in a hotel there, then we flew on to Tampere the next morning. Kai bought a car in Tampere. He paid cash. He changed a lot of money at the airport. He didn't want to go to a car-hire firm, but he knew a man in Tampere who sold second-hand cars. We went to his flat, and his wife told us we'd find him in a bar near by. It was full of men and smoke: short grey men in bright jackets with sports logos on them. They stared at us. We went round to the man's garage and there was a yellow Saab with 100,000 kilometres on the clock. Not at all the kind of car Kai usually drives, but he gave the man cash. It must have been plenty, because he shook my hand as well as Kai's, and wanted us to come for a drink with him, but we didn't. I was prickly with irritation, not knowing what people were saying or even what their names were. But another side of me relaxed into Kai's shadow and was glad not to think of anything.\n\nThe Saab was a good car, built for rain and blizzards. You could see the point of it as soon as we got out of Tampere. We kept driving north-east, and soon there wasn't much traffic on the roads. All the summer visitors were back in the cities, Kai said, and the summer-houses were shut. I was tired because I hadn't slept well in the hotel in Helsinki. It was too hot in our room, and some engineers came back drunk at two o'clock in the morning and made a row in the corridor. I wanted to look round Helsinki the next morning, but Kai said he'd had enough of cities. 'Let's get away from everything,' he said. It seemed a pity not to stay and look at the harbour, and the boats leaving for Tallinn and St Petersburg. I'd always wanted to go to St Petersburg. It was hard to believe that now it was only a hundred and fifty miles away, and if we got into a train and headed east we'd soon be in Russia. Kai bought me a map of Finland so I'd know where I was, and where we were going. It kept shocking me slightly when I heard him speaking Finnish, even though it was only to the hotel receptionist and the waitress at dinner and people like that. I'd never heard him talking his own language except on the telephone. I couldn't understand a word of it. It wasn't like not understanding German or Italian, where some of the words swim out of the blur because you know them from war films or operas. There weren't any handholds at all. It wasn't till then that I really understood how brilliant Kai's English was. He could walk in and out of the two languages as if they were rooms in his house.\n\nI've never seen such quiet roads. Sometimes a track led off into the forest, to a logging camp. Otherwise it was just forest, dark and quiet. I kept falling asleep, jerking awake, falling asleep again. It felt as if we'd been driving through the forest for ever, not speaking to each other. Kai had the radio on and it played long mournful songs with plenty of accordion. His favourites. He sang along in Finnish some of the time.\n\nThe tan on my feet looks yellow in this morning light, not brown. It's too cold for sandals, and there's been a heavy dew. Lucky I packed my Doc Martens. If I knew which ones to pick, I could go into the forest and gather mushrooms for breakfast; but I only know field mushrooms. Kai says that people here take mushrooms into the chemist's for identification, if they aren't sure what they've picked. There isn't a chemist anywhere near here, though. No shops, no lights, no litter blowing along the ground, no advertisements, no sound of traffic. Just forest and water. We stopped at a town about twenty-five miles from the summer-house, on our way, and bought our stores in the little supermarket. It was a tiny town, more like a village, centred on the railway station. A group of kids was hanging over the railway bridge, gazing down the tracks until they disappeared into the forest. It was a quiet grey afternoon and the kids stared up at us, long and slow, then back down the track again. The girl on the till in the supermarket kept looking at Kai's leather jacket until he said something to her which made her laugh. She was asking where he got it, he said. She liked the design. She had a good eye, I thought, remembering what that jacket had cost. I had my own leather jacket in the back of the car, slung over the seat. The wind ran over my arms and I thought I'd put it on, next time we stopped. It was nice being in the car. It was our own world with nobody else in it. I didn't even want Kai talking to the girl on the till. Once we were alone, really alone, we'd work out everything that'd been happening.\n\nKai bought a trolleyful of tins and packets, and a sack of potatoes. He'd bought beer and vodka back in Tampere. I went and got some fruit: little scaly apples and grapes which had been in their plastic nests much too long. We dumped everything in the car and set off again. I felt as if I was going on holiday with my parents, the way you do when you're a kid, not knowing how long the journey is going to be or where you're going. Not really believing that the journey will ever end, and not really wanting it to. Just being taken.\n\n'When will we get there?'\n\n'Soon.'\n\nThere's a small double bed and two bunks in the bedroom. The Linnas and their kids sleep all in one room when they're at the summer-house, though Kai says they sleep out on the veranda too, if the mosquitoes aren't too bad. There's timber stacked under a tarpaulin behind the house, so I think they're planning to build an extension, perhaps another bedroom. Marja and Matti built this place themselves. It's the kind of little house in the forest which you think you could live in for the rest of your life. You know it so well, because of all the fairy stories about little houses deep in the forest. But in fairy stories something happens. A witch or a prince knocks at the door and everyone's life changes. Here, nobody knocked. No one would come here until spring now, except for the hunters.\n\nThe bed is too small for us. Kai isn't sleeping well. He tosses and kicks off the duvet. He groans and I try to wake him because I know he's having a nightmare, but he throws me off and I have to listen until he starts making little sounds in his throat as if he's choking and then he wakes and grabs for me. He's sweaty and trembling. I think he's ill. It's cold at night and later on I wake up too, time after time, because he's been throwing himself about in the bed again and the duvet's fallen on to the rug.\n\nI've moved across to the bottom bunk now. It's tiny, but fine for me as long as I don't sit up suddenly and crack my head on the slats of the top bunk. I curl up against the pine walls. There are knots in the wood, and I expect the Linnas' children trace out patterns of eyes and noses with their fingers before they go to sleep. Or perhaps one child stays awake later than the other, and he shuts his eyes and smells the wood and listens to the wind in the birches by the house and pretends this is a ship sailing through the forest. I used to wonder what Lulu imagined at night, what she dreamed, but she could never tell me. Sometimes she whimpered and cried. Perhaps the boy dreams of wolves. Kai hasn't seen the Linna boys since they were babies. I don't know when he telephoned the Linnas to ask if we could use the summer-house. The key was under a stone by the sauna door, wrapped in a plastic bag, and Kai knew where everything was. We'll pack it all away again, when we leave.\n\nYou can't see far from the veranda. There are no horizons. Just trees, and water. It's an area of small lakes, nothing like Lake Saimaa in the east, Kai says, but the lake looks big enough to me. And it's deep; it has that slaty shine you only get on deep water. There's a little path down through the birch trees, from the summer-house to the lake's edge. The Linnas have their little jetty there, and there's a grey sandy bit of beach. The kids have been digging castles. The sand has nearly collapsed back into shape, but not quite. In the mornings the grass and moss is wet with dew. The Linnas keep a boat, but that's put away for the winter too. There are a couple of rods, and when we first came Kai said he'd do some fishing, but he hasn't. I'd like to fish. Birch leaves are falling into the lake already, very slowly, one by one, so that you find them floating there in the mornings, then they sink down. There's a sharp smell in the air, the smell of autumn. In the middle of the day it still gets quite warm, and I spread out some cushions on the veranda and shut my eyes and let the sun run over my face. There are big dewy cobwebs on the veranda every morning. Sometimes I sit for a long time and watch the spider working her way round the web. Some days it is so still that every twig and leaf is reflected upside-down in the water. You can watch and watch until it feels as if the water and the forest are talking to each other in words you can't quite hear and would never understand anyway. They lean close to one another, brushing against one another with sounds I'm too human to catch. I've never been anywhere so still. In England there's always machinery operating far off, or a road not quite out of earshot, or the RAF splitting the sky overhead. But here every birdsong has its own space.\n\nTwo days ago Kai went out without me. I listened to the Saab's engine dying away down the track. I could hear it for a long time. Then I sat there on the veranda. It was too quiet to play the radio, and a little too cold to sit for long. I went indoors and made myself coffee. All the sounds were distinct, as if they were part of a percussion piece being played in front of an audience which didn't even dare to cough. I imagined people leaning forward in their seats to listen as my spoon dug into the coffee granules. Freeze-dried coffee is noisy stuff.\n\nI leaned on the veranda, looking down through the trees at the steady grey shine of the lake. A fish plopped, way out in the water. I thought I would like to go out with one of the Linnas' rods. I would sit on the end of the jetty all morning with only water in front of me. Lakes in England always have people watching them, saying how beautiful they are, catching fish in them or sailing on them. They reflect back all the eyes which have looked at them. Of course people fish and swim and sail here, but there are so many lakes you couldn't ever use all of them. You can't even count them. Miles from anywhere \u2013 except that after a few days you forget about anywhere. Anywhere is here.\n\nI stood and thought of the lakes and forests going on all the way to Russia, and then straight on without taking breath, because borders don't make any difference to the pattern of water and trees. What if Kai didn't come back? I used to be so afraid of that in England. Now I just wondered how long it would take me to walk the twenty-five miles to the town. I knew I could do it. There must have been neighbours living nearer, in the forest, but I wouldn't be able to make them understand what had happened. I had money, though. I could speak that language.\n\nI took money from Kai, the third day we were here. He was drinking a lot already. The first two or three hours each night he slept heavily, before he started his nightmares. While he was sleeping I took Finnish money and English money, and hid it under the sauna inside a plastic bag, the way the Linnas had hidden the keys. He must have known it had gone, but he never said anything. I felt as if he was afraid of me, though I don't know why. That day Kai went out and I realized how hard it was to be in the same room with him now, or even in the same house. There were too many things we couldn't talk about. He knew I knew about the business. Often I'd catch him watching me, and his eyes looked small and hurt as if I was in the wrong, not him. I hadn't trusted him. I didn't believe him about Vicki. Not that Vicki seemed important any more. I wondered why she'd been so powerful. I couldn't even be bothered to think about Vicki here.\n\nHe tried to explain about her again, but I stopped him and said I didn't want to talk about it, it was better to forget the whole thing. I was standing quite near him. He was at the table drinking and doing a crossword, and he reached out and pulled me close to him. He pressed against me, grinding his face into my stomach and we stayed like that for quite a long time, me looking down on the top of his head and him with his arms wrapped round my body. He hadn't washed his hair for a few days and I could smell that warm dirty smell. There was so much grey in it. I looked over his head and saw the forest through the open door, and wished I was out in it. It was easy not to think about Vicki, but I did think about Paul Parrett. I wanted to see him again. It wasn't finished.\n\nI keep dreaming about Enid. I expect it's being alone so much. They are long dreams, like conversations. I wake up wishing I'd said goodbye to Enid and told her where I was going. She must think that I don't want to see her because she knows too much about me and Kai, and that I ran away because I didn't want to cope with all that. Perhaps I did. Once I dreamed of Enid in the bath, feeling around for her soap and not finding it, and calling out for me before she remembered I'd gone. 'Nad-een! Nad-een!'\n\nBut that's stupid. After ad, Enid managed for years before I came. And she's got things I haven't got: all that past. I only know a bit of it. I keep thinking of the Manchester Ladies. They are like a childhood photograph that I've looked at so much that I can't tell the difference between the memory I've built around the image and a real memory. Sometimes it is as real as if it had happened to me, not Enid. I can hear Sukey's voice. I can smell her hair. Sukey the rescuer; that's what Enid thinks she was, but I'm not so sure. There's something frightening about Sukey too. I can hear things about Sukey through the gaps in the story, the things Enid doesn't say.\n\nI wrote a long letter to Enid while Kai was out. It was easy to write. I told her about the summer-house, and the lake, and swimming alone in the cold water. I could have made it sound like a wonderful holiday, just the two of us together, in the middle of nowhere, but I told her other things as well, about Kai drinking and us not talking about Vicki or the business, and about the money I'd taken. I couldn't imagine when I'd be able to post the letter, but it was good to write it. I hadn't written anything for a long time, because of the way the words fuzzed out of shape, but this was easy. I didn't need to read it back.\n\nKai came back in the late afternoon. It was a shock when I heard the car engine: almost frightening. For a moment I wanted to run off and hide in the trees. He came in smiling and looking much better, and he said he'd got a surprise for me. 'Come out to the car, Nadine.' Then he gave me that small furtive look again. I went out to look, though I didn't really care what he'd brought back. The boot of the Saab was tied down with rope and there was a bike in it. A mountain bike, a really good one. Kai untied the rope and got the bike out. It was brand-new, a beautiful heavy machine with twenty-one gears. Just the kind of thing I'd always wanted. But it was frightening too. Kai stood there beaming like a daddy who'd just bought his little girl her birthday bike. I knew he'd done it because I told him how frustrating it was not to be able to drive, and asked him if he'd teach me. There wasn't any traffic here and it would be perfectly safe. But I sensed that he didn't want to teach me, and once I saw the bike I knew.\n\n'You'll see something of our Finnish countryside now,' he said. His English was getting more stilted. I hadn't been sure at first, but it was really noticeable now. I thought it must be deliberate. Kai'd always boasted that he spoke English better than any Finn he'd ever met. If people thought he was anything, they thought he was American, because his teacher had been American. He was peeling it off, all that language, all that knowledge, and I didn't know why. I thought maybe it was because he felt safe back here in his own country. He wanted to retreat deeper and deeper into silence. Sometimes I wondered where he really wanted to go.\n\nI looked at the bike and felt quite depressed. You can get out on a bike, but not very far. I wanted to go miles and miles. And in the back of the boot there was a cardboard box full of beer, and three bottles of vodka. Jesus, Kai, I said to myself. I looked at his belly under his t-shirt. He didn't feel the cold, because he was so much heavier than me. Kai has this thick warm flesh which means he can go out in the frost in a shirt.\n\nI hooked my feet into the pedal straps and cycled off. The broad tyres felt very safe. It was perfect for riding on tracks and paths in the forest. It felt powerful too, with all the gears and a strong, lightweight aluminium frame. A bike like this would cost five or six hundred pounds in England. Maybe more. I pedalled on, waving a hand to Kai and calling back. 'I'm just going to try it out.'\n\nThe summer-house is a couple of miles off the road, but the track is quite good because it's also a forestry vehicle track for the first mile and a half. They're not logging now. I wish they were; I'd like to hear the whine of a saw and the slow tear of trees coming down. I rode carefully, wobbling a bit, getting the feel of the bike. Soon I was out of sight of the summer-house. When I got to the road I thought I'd turn left, up the road I didn't know. The road was as quiet as before, with no traffic or sound of traffic. The trees that lined the road weren't birches. These were commercial evergreens, waiting for harvest, dark and bare-trunked, leaning in slightly. They had a watching look. I couldn't see too far into the forest. It was so dark, and the trees were close together. They didn't look as if they were trying to grow upwards into the light. They looked as if they preferred the changeless, barren dark they'd created. Nothing much grew under them. There was a carpet of needles and a dry sour smell which stuck to the back of my throat.\n\nI thought if I looked back, I would see the trees move. They would spread out across the road, covering it, barring my way. Anything could happen here, because this wasn't somewhere, it was anywhere. The trees loomed and shrunk me to nothing. I might have been an insect crawling through the stiff fur of a black bear. The branches round me looked like bristles. I was breathing quite fast and I knew I wasn't far from panic. I was out in the open, but I was getting the kind of feeling I get in lifts or in the Tube. I did what I've learned to do: I shut my mind, blinkered off my senses, breathed deeply, pedalled hard. I was going to ride this bike.\n\nThe trees went on and on, a tunnel there was no getting out of. I'd made my point. I hadn't gone scurrying back at the first flash of panic. I must have cycled about four miles or so, and I didn't want to go too far the first time. I didn't like the idea of having to stop and rest here, listening to the trees whisper.\n\nKai was already drinking when I returned. He wouldn't try out the bike, but he thought I ought to explore the forest on it every day. I wouldn't have to stick to the roads. This bike was tough enough to handle tracks. He'd bought a helmet too, to protect my head. It would be better exercise for me than swimming in the lake, which was much too cold. Kai would never admit that my swimming in the lake made him uneasy: not so much because it was dangerous, but because I think he couldn't swim. He didn't like me going where he couldn't go. I swam every day, when the sun grew warm.\n\n'Have you eaten?' I asked. 'I was going to make something.'\n\n'No, I'm not hungry. But I bought some vegetables for you. They're in the car.'\n\n'Let's go out,' I said suddenly. I couldn't face another long grey evening with Kai drinking and me flicking the pictures in magazines or listening to endless weather forecasts and tango music on the radio.\n\n'Go out? Why do you want to go out? It's nice here. Besides' \u2013 he swallowed the rest of his drink \u2013 'besides, I have taken too much alcohol. You know our laws about driving and alcohol.' He looked at me smugly.\n\n'All right. Tomorrow. There must be somewhere we could go. What about the bar in the town?'\n\n'There is something,' he admitted. 'There's a dance in the town hall on Friday. But you won't like it, it's all the type of music you don't like.' A flash of frustration went over me, as powerful as the earlier flash of panic. I couldn't understand the posters for coming events, even if I'd been able to drive into town. Kai wouldn't have said anything about the dance if I hadn't asked. He owned the language now. He was in control, driving the car, telling me what he wanted to tell me.\n\n'Of course I want to go. I'd like to meet some Finnish people. Otherwise I might as well be anywhere.'\n\n'O\u039a. We'll go.' He poured more vodka, filled a saucer with peanuts and began to crunch them between his front teeth. I went to fetch in the vegetables. He had bought fruit too, those acid Spanish plums you can buy in England nearly all the year round. Bright red, tight-skinned plums, not melting and sweet like Czars or Victorias. Just carrying them set my teeth on edge. When I came back, Kai was singing to himself. I listened. The song gave me exactly the same feeling as I'd had in the forest on my bike. As if something was closing in on me.\n\n'What does it mean?' I asked.\n\n'You mean, what does it mean in English? Nothing. It only means something here.'\n\n'Tell me the words anyway.'\n\nKai hummed, as if to catch the tune again. 'It says:\n\nKarelia moon\n\ndaylight is dying\n\nand you are sleeping\n\nKarelia moon\n\ndaylight is dying\n\ntonight you can't climb\n\nclose to the stars\n\ntonight you sleep\n\nsleep in the dark\n\nclose to my heart.'\n\nThe words finished, but Kai kept on humming quietly. Moths were banging around the lamp, hurting their wings. I wanted to get on the bike and ride to the nearest town where there'd be a hamburger bar and order a triple cheeseburger and double fries and a thick shake and relish and bright red tomato sauce and put money in the jukebox until the music drowned everything. Instead I went into the kitchen and began to make a grated carrot salad with French dressing. I'd cook potatoes and sausages with it. Kai needed something to soak up the alcohol. I'd made Jansson's Temptation yesterday, from one of Marja Linna's cookery books. Kai had translated the recipe for me, but he hadn't eaten any of it. There was a cold wodge of it in the fridge. Still, we were going to the dance on Friday.\n\nThe front door of the house opens and Tony drops his overnight bag in the hall. He's tired and sweaty. The air is greasy and much too warm. It's going to rain. There's thunder in the air. His shirt itches, even though it was clean on that morning in London. He'll take a bath and change. But first, coffee.\n\nA really good trip. He'd made some new contacts. And he'd telephoned Paul Parrett at ten that morning. Paul Parrett had thanked him for the dinner.\n\n'It's a pleasure,' said Tony. 'A pleasure. I knew you'd like Nadine. She's a really sweet kid.'\n\n'Yes, we had a good time,' said Paul Parrett.\n\n'Yeah, Nadine's got something. Fantastic looks, someone ought to photograph her.'\n\n'I expect someone will.' There was a short silence.\n\n'Nadine's got loads of potential,' went on Tony, gabbling a bit, but then it was always tough talking to Paul Parrett. He left so much silence for you to fill up. 'She's a sensible kid too,' he added, his relief that everything seemed to have gone OK making him feel quite warm, for a moment, towards Nadine. It'd been a gamble doing it on his own, but it'd paid off. Kai'd been ready for something to happen, but he hadn't been ready to make it happen. He was going to be pleased.\n\n'You don't get a lot of girls like Nadine,' he went on. Tony liked this type of chat. Getting the message across, not saying too much.\n\n'Yes,' said Paul Parrett. 'It was good to meet her.'\n\nAnother silence, OK, but Tony judged it wasn't the time to say any more. No need anyway. Kai'd been through the terms with Janice. Tony drew a chain of interlocking daisies on the hotel telephone pad. Then, 'Well, I got to get on,' he said. 'Busy man, eh? Not like you, though, Mr Parrett.' He paused, letting the idea of public life fill the silence. In his mind he saw the big black car draw up, the security men hold open the door, the car pull away with Paul Parrett in the back, already talking on his car phone. He saw the gates which would open, the saluting policemen, the big desks and carpets which soaked up the noise of footsteps. The Palace of Westminster. Once you'd got all that, you'd do anything to keep it. And there was always someone ready to put a ferret down your trousers.\n\n'I'll let you have a note,' said Paul Parrett, 'about that business we were discussing last night.'\n\nThe daisy grew bigger and tiny sharp teeth appeared on its petals. 'Yeah, that's right,' said Tony. 'Take the figures we were working with before, and we'll go from there.'\n\n'That's fine. And we must fix up another of those dinners.'\n\nYou got to give him credit, thought Tony. Cool as a cucumber. You'd think he was paying his fucking Access bid. Funny how some people got their kicks. Like driving right on the edge of the cliff when there was a fucking great four-lane motorway going your way.\n\n'Yeah,' said Tony. 'We'll be in touch.' He yawned luxuriously, booted a hotel towel off the foor with his foot and kicked it into the air. A good start. Now to check out and get on that train and tell Kai what was going on. Or maybe leave it a bit. Wait till it was all fixed up.\n\nThe house is quiet. He's got it to himself, and he'll cook a good meal before going to visit Clara's _nonna_ in St Th\u00e9r\u00e9se's Hospice. Everything is working out well there. That little misunderstanding with Paolo is all sorted out. There, the rain's coming, just as he thought. Big separate drops. The summer is breaking up. There's a grumble of thunder, far off. He picks up his mug of coffee and goes upstairs to the bathroom. He isn't really looking at anything, and when he first sees Enid it is only as a blotch which shouldn't be there on the everyday lightness of the stairs.\n\nBoiling black coffee slops over his hand. He swears, not at the pain, but at the still bundle at the bottom of the stairs. 'Jesus, Jesus,' he says aloud. Just when everything is going so well. The old woman. Fuck it to buggery. He puts down the coffee and wipes his hands carefully. The way she's fallen he can't see her face, so he kneels by her head. She's a terrible colour and a black thread of blood has gone solid and stuck under her nose. He checks her ears, but there's no blood coming out of them. Very lightly, he touches her cheek with the back of his hand. It is cool but not cold. Not dead cold. He reaches out for her left wrist and feels around for the pulse. He's not quite sure where this ought to be. The angle's all wrong. The arm is floppy, not stiff. How long's she been here?\n\nKai must've gone over to Vick's for the night. Again Tony fumbles for the pulse, but can't tell if what he feels is his own blood bumping in his fingers or the old woman's. Jesus. This is going to mean trouble. He shouldn't've touched her.\n\nTony sits back on his heels, eyes black and blank. No one knows he's back from London. He could walk out again right now and leave someone else to find her. It won't make any difference to the old woman. She'll die anyway. She's been lying on the boards for hours. Why did it have to happen now, just when everything was going so well? And why should he have to deal with it? Police and doctors coming to the house. Questions.\n\nCarefully and almost tenderly, Tony rearranges Enid's arm as it was. Perhaps he can fetch a cushion so her head won't be on the hard wood. His shirt is sticking to him again.\n\nEnid groans. It's a small sound. Nobody would hear it unless he was right by her, kneeling down, almost touching her. Tony jumps. He stares at Enid and a thread of sweat runs down inside his shirt. No more sound. Maybe he imagined it.\n\nWhy is she doing this to him? Any other old woman would have been killed right off by the fall. It's unnatural. What if she opens her eyes and looks at him? Does she know he's there?\n\nHe sits back on his heels, very still, thinking. After all, he argues against himself, what harm can it do? Why not? There's nothing here. The house is clean. Even Kai can't be that paranoid. It's not as if it's involving anyone else. She's just fallen downstairs, that's all. It's not a crime.\n\nShe moans again. Now he knows. It's a sign.\n\nTony stands up, steadying himself, and looks down at the old woman's body. Yes, she's alive. Only a pinch of life but it won't let him go. Then he turns and goes down the stairs to the telephone and dials. Controlling a natural impulse, he gives the correct address to the placidly inquiring voice on the other end, then wipes sweat off his face. There won't be time for a bath before the ambulance arrives, but he should still be able to go and see Clara's _nonna,_ who will be expecting them. Jesus.\n\nLess than fifteen minutes later the ambulance whoops into the square. The ambulance-men are gentle and reassuring with Tony, even though he doesn't seem to be listening when they tell him he can go with them to the Infirmary in the ambulance. From his sweaty pallor they can tell that he is in shock.\n\n## _Twenty-one_\n\n'There's bruising on her upper arms; do you think it ought to go on her notes?' suggests the sister discreetly. The young houseman flushes. He hadn't noted the bruises. He's been on duty for twenty-three hours and he's running between six serious emergencies beside Enid. She's just one case and he's already spotted concussion, suspected skull fracture, shock, hypothermia and a broken arm. Accident and emergency is packed. He takes the notes from the sister and writes. His fingers are sweaty and they leave a soft place on the paper.\n\nAfter the head x-rays they make Enid comfortable for the night. Her arm's been set. She'll have a night in intensive care, but she should be on a ward by the morning. The bruises are inspected. The staff have had a training course on abuse of elderly people by their carers but there's no next of kin on Enid's form. The ambulance-men said that the young man who called them hadn't been in the house when the fall occurred. He gave what details he could, but he didn't accompany the patient to hospital. The police will have to get in touch with him to check the facts. The bruising doesn't look consistent with a simple fall downstairs. Very upset, he was, apparently. Let's hope they send a tactful policewoman.\n\nEveryone calls her Enid. They talk to her all the time, even though she's unconscious. They know that patients can hear even when they give no signs of awareness. Hearing is the last sense to go and the first to return. On the operating table, anaesthetized patients have been known to twitch at surgeon's jokes. So staff are careful now.\n\n'You're doing fine. We'll soon make you more comfortable. You've had a fall l and hurt your arm. You're just going to have a little injection now, and then we're going to pop you down to x-ray. Donald's taking you on the trolley, you'll be all right with Donald, won't you?' Enid's jaunty pink sweater is cut and peeled from her body. She dreams of being swung through space, then stops dreaming.\n\nIt is mid-morning on the ward before Enid regains consciousness. It's nothing dramatic. The slow and intermittent process is noted by the ward sister, who came on shift when Enid was transferred from intensive care. There is eye movement under Enid's lids, then she begins to stir. Her head moves slowly to one side.\n\n'You're in hospital, Enid,' says the nurse distinctly. 'You've had a little accident, but you're getting better. Don't worry now. Just relax.' She checks the drip, takes Enid's blood pressure and records the figures. For a couple of hours Enid remains with eyes closed, twitching slightly, occasionally moaning. A doctor on his ward rounds lifts her eyelid, shines a light in, tests her reflexes. She's a fighter, she's doing well.\n\nEnid is aware of something yellow and kind in front of her. For a long time she doesn't know that it's the sunlight on the wall opposite. When she's worked this out, she closes her eyes. Everything hurts. 'It's dark inside my head.' Who said that? A little later she is awake again, and thirsty. Her mouth is very dry. She tries to run her tongue over her lips but it sticks. Anyway she's too tired. Pain comes in pulses but she won't let it wash her away. Each time she holds it back. Then she sleeps. A blurred dark shape has settled close to her. She squints but it hurts her eyes. She understands that the shape is a face with dark hair round it.\n\n'Nadine,' she says, 'Nadine,' and her fingers pull at the crisply boiled sheet. The auxiliary nurse pats her hand and reassures her, then goes back to the nursing station.\n\n'Enid's waking up. She said something just now.'\n\n'Did you catch it?'\n\n'I think it was a name. She's asking for someone.'\n\n'Better tell sister. There was a policewoman in just now. She wants to sit with Enid once she's awake.'\n\nThe drinks trolley butts its way over polished flooring, between lockers and beds and slow-creeping patients with drip-stands attached to their arms. The air fills with smells of Ovaltine and hot chocolate. Sunlight plays warmly and gently on hurt flesh and on the skin which forms quickly on the drinks of patients who are too tired to lift their cups. The nurses move to and fro, bare-armed and strong, coming on duty with the smell of outdoors on their clothes and hair.\n\nThe car park outside the town hall is full of young men when Kai and Nadine arrive for the dance. They are wearing jeans and leather jackets, and they sprawl against cars or stand under the two lamps, drinking cans of strong lager. It's dark already and electric light streams invitingly from the dance hall windows. They can hear the music. There's going to be a band tonight; it tours all round the countryside, Kai says, playing in one small town after another. It is quite famous in the Finnish countryside, he says. Older men are on the veranda, drinking from a bottle of vodka. Kai isn't going to drink tonight: he's promised. He's got to drive them back, and once he starts drinking these days he doesn't stop until his head drops on the table, or, by sheer luck, on the pillow. It's grim drinking, with no pleasure in it. Sometimes he gets up and walks steadily, heavily, to the veranda where he can hear the night noises of the forest and smell the water.\n\nThe hall is bright but bare. On the stage the band is warming up, but nobody's dancing yet. Men congregate on one side of the hall, women on the other. There are some tables.\n\n'Can't we sit together?' asks Nadine.\n\n'No, this is your chance to meet some Finnish people,' says Kai with satisfaction. He leads Nadine over to a table where there are three matrons drinking orange squash and mineral water. They are packed tightly into pink, bright blue and shiny black dresses, and their hair is permed into tight colour-rinsed frizzes. They are the jailers of their hair, thinks Nadine. They waft a strong warm smell of make-up and perfume. Kai explains Nadine to them in Finnish. Broad smiles are turned to her, hands are shaken and Kai leaves. Then there is nothing to say. The smiles cannot go on for ever, and none of the three ladies speaks English. After a polite minute they turn back to their conversation and orange squash, nodding and smiling at Nadine from time to time. Nadine sits still, very conscious of her short tight dress and of having nothing to drink. A few moments later Kai comes back from the bar with an alcohol-free lager for Nadine. He points to the red illuminated panels at the end of the dance hall.\n\n'When the top one lights up, it is men's turn to ask women to dance. When the bottom lights up it means women's turn to ask men.'\n\n'Oh, God,' says Nadine. 'What do I do if I don't want to dance with somebody?'\n\n'Just dance with him for one dance. You were the one who wanted to come.'\n\n'But I won't be able to say anything.'\n\n'You'll be dancing, not talking.'\n\nNadine waits in dread for the lighting up of the panels. The band is playing more vigorously now, one of Kai's sad endless songs. The accordionist pumps, and a man in a dark blue suit comes forward, seizes the microphone and begins to sing, his eyes half shut. His voice is beautiful, sonorous, resonant. Suddenly the song makes sense. Nadine leans forward to watch and listen. She has not noticed the lighting up of 'men's turn', and is surprised when a moment later a young man with very short and much gelled hair blocks her view and stands there unsmiling. The three matrons beam encouragement and explain to the young man that she is English, a foreigner, but keen to dance. Nadine stands and is taken into the young man's arms. The dance seems to resemble a foxtrot, which she more or less knows how to do. They dance past Kai, who is deep in talk with a group of heavy middle-aged men. They dance past the singer and his voice vibrates through Nadine, making her close her eyes with pleasure. The young man holds her and does not attempt to talk. Soon they are back at the table. She smiles and says one of the few Finnish words Kai has taught her: _'Kittos.'_ Unsmiling as ever, the young man nods, then heads off outside for another beer. Nadine relaxes. But the next moment the light is on 'women's turn'. The three matrons get up purposefully and head off across the room. One of them spots that Nadine is missing her chance. She pulls her up, points vigorously at a likely partner on the other side of the room and shoos Nadine towards him. Nadine veers sideways to a quiet older man in a suit. She likes the look of this one. In a moment they are dancing. Nadine is triumphant. She has done it, she has coped in spite of Kai. The man even speaks a bit of English. He thinks she is very clever to understand 'men's turn' and 'women's turn'.\n\n'Our Finnish dances are difficult for foreigners,' he remarks, pronouncing the _g_ firmly.\n\n_'El\u00e4m\u00e4 on vaikea,'_ she ripostes, using the only Finnish phrase Kai has succeeded in teaching her, through constant repetition. Life is hard. Her partner beams approval. He is small and rotund, with shiny peat-coloured eyes. He reminds her slightly of Paul Parrett.\n\nAfter several dances Nadine glows with confidence. She has cracked Finnish social life successfully. None of the young men she has selected has refused her. Then a man comes to the microphone and begins to talk without stopping in lugubrious tones. Everyone in the hall roars with laughter. The matrons even have to get out their handkerchiefs to wipe off mascara which is smudged by tears of laughter. Nadine fixes a smile on her face and looks across at Kai. He doesn't notice her, he is laughing so much. She sees the wet red inside of his mouth, laughing.\n\nThen the dancing begins again and it's all right. The three ladies buy orange squash for Nadine and she buys them alcohol-free beers. The men dance energetically now, fuelled by drink. Then there is a long, slow number. Nadine is clasped against her middle-aged partner again. He becomes sentimental, strokes her hair off her forehead and tells her he always wanted a daughter. He has two sons, one at Helsinki University, one at Turku. But why doesn't she grow her hair long? Perhaps he is a distant cousin of Paul Parrett, thinks Nadine. The evening is turning out well, though she cannot see Kai anywhere. And those men he was talking to \u2013 they've gone too. Everybody's in couples, except for the matrons who are beating time and smiling from the side of the hall. Where's he gone? God, what if he's drinking? She stiffens inside her partner's embrace. She excuses herself, leaving him smiling in confusion, not liking to admit that his English isn't up to following what she's just said. She scoops up her bag from the table, smiles again, shakes hands with the matrons, and goes.\n\nYes, there he is, under the lamp-post with a whole group of them, passing vodka. He watches her with unfriendly eyes as she approaches. He's been drinking, all right. He is shoulder to shoulder with the men, and he stares at her with deliberate blankness. He's a different man from her English Kai.\n\n'How are we going to get home?' she whispers fiercely. 'You can't drive in this state. If you get caught you'll go to jail.'\n\n'Go to jail, go to hell. One of my friends will take me,' he says, lordly, dismissing her.\n\n'They're all drunk too,' she says. She spots another bottle going round. Kai turns back to the other men and begins to talk in Finnish.\n\n'No, Kai. I want to go now.'\n\n'Then you drive, Nadine. You drive us home.' He hands her the car keys, capitulating, challenging. The men laugh. They are used to this sort of thing. They don't know that Nadine can't drive. Kai shrugs and smiles, playing to the gallery.\n\n'Right,' says Nadine. 'Right. I will. Get in the car.'\n\nLuckily the Saab is parked on the edge of the car park, not locked in among other cars. She'll never be able to reverse out. Kai gets into the passenger-seat and sits there with a smile on his face, watching to see what she'll do. He thinks he's called her bluff, does he? Thank God, it's an automatic. She ought to be able to manage.\n\n'You'll have to direct me,' she says sharply. 'We don't want to end up lost in the forest.'\n\n'O\u039a, OK, I know the way.'\n\nShe puts in the key and turns it. The engine ignites, then stops. She turns it again and this time it's OK. Gently, she eases the gear from PARK to DRIVE and presses the right-hand pedal. Nothing happens. She's being too gentle. She tries again and then she remembers the handbrake. The car creeps forward, then suddenly jumps. Kai reaches over and the lights spring on. The car moves down to the road. She knows she's got to turn right here. The car jerks and jolts as she accelerates too much, then too little. It's OK, she tells herself, you'll get the feel of it in a minute. It can't be that hard. All sorts of idiots drive. She sits bolt upright, tense, gripping the wheel. The speedometer wavers on twenty kilometres an hour. She'll do it. She'll defeat Kai, she'll get them safely home. The car's lights probe forward into a dark tunnel. They are past the last houses of the village and into the forest.\n\n'You've got to stay awake,' she says, 'I don't know where we turn off.'\n\nOn and on they go, mile after mile. She is driving, she's doing it. 'Go faster, Nadine,' grumbles Kai, but she daren't. Twenty-five kilometres an hour, thirty. She can't take her attention off the road for a second. She is alone with the road and the forest, more alone than if the seat beside her was empty.\n\n'We turn off here,' says Kai out of long silence and darkness.\n\nShe panicks, wrenches the wheel too hard and the Saab judders across the entrance to the track, nearly hitting a post. Stones bounce up and tang off the side of the car.\n\n'Maybe I'll drive now,' says Kai.\n\n'No. I'm going to drive all the way home.'\n\nAnd she does. Very slowly all the way up the pitch-dark, rough forest track, flinching at moths in the headlights. And there is the unlit bulk of the summer-house, and they are home. Kai gets out, walks slowly past the house, and takes the path to the lake. Nadine switches off the engine and sits still in the seat. Her hands are trembling. It's only because she's been gripping the wheel so tightly. She looks at her watch. The journey has taken well over an hour, and here she is. She's got them both back safely. Her stomach hurts. She's got to have something to eat.\n\nKai stays outside the summer-house for a long time. She wonders what he's doing, but she's glad he's out of the way. The little wooden house feels more claustrophobic than ever. It will be unbearable with the two of them in it tonight. The living-room smells of the tinned leek and potato soup she has heated. The thought of another day of silence and forest, broken only by meals, drinking and staring at old copies of Finnish women's magazines, fills her with nausea. Kai has changed, or else she's changed. The money in his pockets is paper. He can't help her, and she can't help him. He is not the rescuer.\n\nWhen he comes in she asks him where he's been. He tells her he has been looking at the lake. It's dark, she says, what could he see? There isn't any moon tonight, and there's so much cloud even the stars don't show. Why doesn't he have something to eat, to soak up the vodka? He's drunk enough of it. He yawns and drops heavily on to a chair. He is red-eyed and his shirt is dirty.\n\n'Go to bed,' he says. 'I'll stay up a little.'\n\nHe's going to start that joyless drinking again. She stands up, gathers her magazines and an apple and a glass of water, then stands holding them, looking at Kai.\n\n'Go to hell,' he says, looking back at her smooth, young critical face.\n\nShe'll leave him to it, climb into the little bunk, turn to the wall and abandon him altogether in her dreams.\n\n*\n\nHis mumbling wakes her. He's sitting by the bed, saying her name over and over. 'Nadine. Nadine. Nadine. Are you OK?' The door to the living-room is open and the light is still on in there. She blinks and sits up.\n\n'What's wrong, Kai? Why don't you come to bed?'\n\nHis weight comes at her. For a second she thinks he's going to hit her. Then she feels him shaking. He wants her to hold him. She braces herself against the hard wooden wall and puts her arms round him. It is ridiculous, the two of them crushed into this child's bunk. Any moment now the slats will give way. She rocks him feebly, oppressed by his heat and weight and the smell of drink. Girls at school used to say it was OK to drink vodka in dinner-hour because no one would smell it on your breath in the afternoon. Well, now she knows that wasn't true. It's seeping out of Kai's skin. Funny how you learn things. She feels herself smile helplessly, stupidly, over his dark bulk. He is burning. His rough, hot, prickly face scrubs against her neck. Her lips tighten.\n\n'Go to bed, Kai, you'll feel better in the morning,' she says, and smiles to hear herself say what her mother used to say, hovering in the doorway, wanting to leave Nadine.\n\nKai turns his head against her shoulder and begins to tell her what he's been waiting to tell her since that morning when she lay in the bath, her back arched and water sluicing off her body. And Enid lay upstairs curled round on the boards of an empty room. It's growing in him and he's frightened. He can't get the dark of it out of his head. The vodka doesn't work. His hot whispering voice fills the space of the child's bunk and runs off through the knots in the wood, away into the forest. He tells Nadine what he has done to Enid. He tells Nadine that the Enid she writes to is not there any more. There is nothing and nobody there. His words run like insects over Nadine's body before they find freedom. He is hot and tight on top of her and she cannot move him. Her smile has peeled away from her lips like wax.\n\n## _Twenty-two_\n\n'Enid's dead. Enid's dead because of me. I'm only alive because Enid's dead. No, Enid's dead because I'm alive. No. Enid's dead\u2013'\n\nPedalling fast, Nadine shoots out of the forest on her mountain bike. Here the road straightens and its verges widen. Heavy spruce gives way to a scrub of birch. Here there's light, movement and a flurry of birds. She slows down, her bare brown legs straining to push the pedals. She's come a long way, and now the forest is at her back, a big shadow, soughing, full of hush, broken by sudden creaks and cries. Soon it will be winter. The long sweeping wind from Russia flexes itself and strokes the crowns of spruce and pine until they moan in anticipation and then are quiet again.\n\nNadine doesn't turn round or look back. She can feel the forest like a cold wind behind her. She's got a long way to go yet, and her legs hurt. She'll have to stop and rest. She brakes and gets off the bike clumsily. She'll push it for a while, then she'll sit down. She won't look behind her because there's nothing coming and anyway she'd hear the car miles off and have time to drag the bike off the road into the scrub and hide. She's sure Kai won't be capable of driving for hours yet. He'd crash into a tree if he tried. Also, she's hidden the car keys and it'll take him a long time to find them. She should have thrown them away, deep into the forest or the lake, but she couldn't do it. He'd never be able to get to the town without the Saab. He'd collapse on his way through the forest, and lie vomiting on the moss. She looked at him in the grainy first light and then she left him. All she took was a few clothes in a backpack, and the wad of money from under the sauna. If only she had a mileometer so she could tell how far she's come. Two hours' riding: say thirty kilometres? No, much less. The track from the summer-house to the road was so rough that she hadn't dared go fast, even with thick tyres. A puncture would have been fatal. After that it was uphill quite a lot of the way: one of those long gentle slopes you scarcely notice when you're walking, or in a car. She hasn't got to the lake with the island yet, and she remembers that the road curves round it and then back into the forest before it reaches the town. A black, still, reed-circled lake. Very deep, Kai said as they drove past it. The town isn't much of a town, with its dance hall where people come from miles around to dance tango, its little supermarket which is also a bar, its school. You wonder where all the houses are, and where the people come from. The dance hall was packed last night. The express trains going south and north stop there; she's made sure of that. She doesn't know the times, and there might be hours to wait. It's not so easy to hide in a town. She'll have to dump the bike. She won't need it any more. Kai can pick it up and take it back to the summer-house. He's bound to go straight to the station to look for her, once he finds the keys. He'll guess where she's gone. But not in time. She'll be gone. At first he'll just think she's gone off for a ride. Yes, she'll have to get rid of the bike. It makes her much more conspicuous. People will remember her. 'Have you seen a girl with a bike? A mountain bike? An English girl?' Kids would notice the bike because it's the kind they all want. Aluminium frame, twenty-one gears, quick-release saddle. Kai would question the kids who hang round the dance hall or the railway station in the fag-end of after-school.\n\nWill Kai remember what he said last night \u2013 what he's told her? What she knows? And what will he do if he remembers?\n\nWind shivers through the birches, turning over their leaves. They are dry, beginning to rustle. Their colours are changing. Soon they'll turn to brief gold and then wind and rain will tear them off their branches and they'll be mashed brown by storms before the first snow falls. The sky is a low, cool grey. It rained heavily last night and the bog at the edge of the forest smells sharply of autumn. She listened to the rain while she lay for hour after hour, keeping herself awake, while Kai moaned in his sleep and cried out in the language she didn't speak. Time for cutting firewood for winter and gathering mushrooms. A perfect autumn day, still and mild and smoke-scented.\n\nNadine plods on, one hand on the saddle of the bike, one on the handlebars. Kai says this is the correct way to push a bike \u2013 this way you don't get backache. Not that she ought to need to push the bike: with so many gears she should be able to pedal up the steepest slope. But even though she's much fitter than Kai, she's never been any good at cycling uphill. It makes her legs shake. Ahead of her, dark Sitka spruce are marching towards the edge of the road again. The road's going to twist back into the forest. She doesn't like walking between those dark, airless flanks of trees which crowd out the sky. Better to ride and blot out silence with the swish of tyres. She's had a rest. She mustn't lose any more time.\n\nBut as Nadine cycles round the next bend a flood of light makes her eyes sting. There it is \u2013 she's reached the lake. It's huge and pale, spilling out before her, rimmed on one side by the whitey-grey thread of the little road, on the other by black bog and forest. It's a lonely place. Kai's told her that hunters come here in winter, to shoot in the marsh. There are pike in the lake. Black overhanging rock in a shape like a head and shoulders above the water rears up on the opposite shore. But here, on this side, there's a little beach facing an island only fifty metres or so out in the water. It's a tiny island, the kind you dream of discovering when you're a kid. Short, tufty grass, one birch tree, a fallen branch. A perfect place to put up a tent. It even has its own miniature beach of grey sand, fringed with reeds. The autumn breeze has dropped again and the reflection of the island is flawless, a dark, polished outline on the water. Nadine bumps her bike off the road and down the grass to the beach. It's small, perhaps ten metres across. There are no footprints but her own. No one comes here. There are no summer-houses, no fishing rods, no walkers or cyclists. This is just an ordinary lake, nothing special, one of tens of thousands. The sphagnum moss just off the road is spongy and deep. It sucks around her boots, then she steps on to the dry, crunchy beach which is edged with fading rushes. Pebble and sand shelve shallowly into the clear water. Something flickers around the base of the reeds. Tiny fish. There'll be frogs too, and water-snakes. Nadine leans on her bike, peering into the water.\n\nThen, from behind the island, there sails one swan followed by two cygnets. The cygnets are well grown, brown and grey but with a speckle of white feathers beginning to push through. The cygnets paddle behind, eager and dingy against the parent swan. Another swan glides round the island, followed by three more cygnets. Nadine can't tell which swan is the male, which the female. They sail towards the beach, leaving long rips in the silky lake surface. It is so still that as they come near she can hear their webbed feet plashing under the water. They are close now, and they slow down, watching her. One cygnet drifts off to dive among the reeds. It gives out a frail but confident cry. It is much bolder than the others. The grown swans spread their beaks down flat along the water and sweep from side to side, bills combing the surface. The cygnets bob and imitate, dredging the shallows. The bold cygnet climbs up the beach, its legs awkwardly hinged at the thighs, clumsy out of the water. Its short, stubby wings would never fly. A parent moves in behind it, watching Nadine and the bike. The swan puts down its head and hisses. They can break your arm with a blow from their wings, Nadine remembers. She is miles from anywhere. The swan watches, protecting its young. The other parent bird swims out with two cygnets in its wake. They mate for life, thinks Nadine. They are faithful to one another even if their partner dies. She stands there, watching the swans with extreme attention. The swan stops hissing at her and moves off, plucking at grass. Nadine keeps still, holding the bike upright. It is the bike that frightened the swans, she thinks. When they've moved off a little she'll lower it on to the grass so it won't bother them. There they go now, slipping back into the mineral quiet of the lake. Its surface is dark as graphite. They float back across the lake, their powerful feet working beneath the water. The sound of them thins and disappears as they go back behind the island. They must have their nest there.\n\nShe ought to get on. She's wasting time, but the small beach and the small island hold her. It's one of those places you feel you've seen once before, tantalizingly, from a train or a speeding car. If only you could stay and explore, find at last the template that makes the perfect pattern of water, island, sky...; She crunches across the beach and carefully puts down the bike so it is supported against a low bank of stones. She looks across at the dark spiky top of the forest. It is like fine handwriting which she cannot read.\n\nSo much has happened. She can't make sense of it. Kai says that Enid is dead. He says that he has killed her. She stands still, hearing those words in his drunken mumble. Fine hairs stand up on her upper arms. Summer's over now. Everyone's gone back to the cities, back to jobs and apartments and to starting to think about Christmas.\n\n'Enid liked Christmas. She said she would show me the place on the Downs where she cut holly to decorate her attic. No one else knew about it.'\n\nKai can't go back to England. No more city for Kai, no house, no business, no wads of new money. Only the summer-house in winter, the sky going yellow with snow, the wind feeling its way through knots in summer pine. Kai tells Nadine stories about the winter war, and men on skis gliding through the forest dressed in white, their silent knives in their hands. He'll hunt, he tells her. As long as there's a cupboard full of colourless vodka, he'll be fine. They'd never find him \u2013 why should they look here?\n\n'Enid, darling...; I couldn't help it. What could I have done? I wasn't there. I didn't look after you. _I didn't know it was going to happen.'_\n\nNadine unlaces her boots and puts her socks neatly inside them, pulls her red t-shirt over her head, takes off her shorts, her bra and pants, folds them by the bicycle and walks down to the water's edge. It is cold. Kai has told her not to bathe anywhere unless she knows the water. Some of these lakes are very deep. She should never swim alone. There's always the risk of cramp and sudden exhaustion from cold. Kai can be very protective. He didn't like it when she swam straight out from the summer-house jetty, a hundred metres or so, then lay on her back drifting and watching the clouds while the water lapped her face. She was perfectly safe. She knew how far it was safe to go. Kai never came in the water. Summer was over, he said, it was too late for swimming, but she began to think that perhaps he didn't know how to swim, even though he'll grown up by the sea. Or perhaps it was because he knew, long before she did, that they hadn't come here to swim and boat and fish, like summer visitors. He was drinking so much, more than she'll ever known. She wouldn't have thought anyone could drink so much every night. He was slow in the morning, red-eyed, not clumsy but heavy and unnatural in his movements as if he had to remember painfully how to get out of bed, how to dress himself, how to swallow. He wasn't eating. She made bland porridge for them both but he said his stomach was a ball of acid. Towards evening he might make an omelette. Sometimes he'll vomit up the food.\n\nEvery day she swam, even through the rain, far out on the water where she couldn't see him or know what he was doing. She didn't know how late he stayed up at night. She went to bed early, tired out by walking and swimming and chopping wood and making easy food for herself: soups and black bread and cheese and apples. There wasn't anything to do in the evenings, once it was dark. She couldn't read. Instead she gorged on sleep. She'll sleep ten hours or more and when she woke he'll be at the rickety card-table, a little glass at his right hand, working out calculations on a piece of paper. Something to do with business. Now she knew what those figures represented. She never knew if he'll been drinking all night, or if he'll started early, unable to wash or make their coffee without it.\n\nThe cold still water licks at her ankles. Kai's right: it's really too cold to swim. But she's used to it. She's got tough. She tenses, hearing an engine, then relaxes as a high, lonely aeroplane crosses above the clouds. She bends down, kneels on the coarse sandy bottom of the lake, sweeps the water up over her arms and shoulders. The water is very soft, cold, close-grained. It draws her in; she wants to be deep in it, embraced by it. She gets up and walks forward, covering waist, breasts, shoulders. She wades until she is almost floating, then kicks off and glides. Beneath her are weeds and small red and grey pebbles, beautiful in their wetness. Weeds wave up from the lake shore, frighteningly distinct. The water is delicious on her naked body. There are no waves, only her own rippling disturbance. In front of her everything is smooth.\n\nShe keeps swimming out. Now it's deep underneath her and she doesn't want to look down for fear of what she might see. The pike in this lake are huge, Kai says, but she guesses that the water here is too clear for them. They are fresh-water sharks. They hang in their holes in deep reedy water, waiting for movement. She's beyond weeds, and the lake is deep and dark all around her. She rests, sculling with her hands. But she must swim farther. She can't swim round the island because of the swans. Now that she is naked and in their element, she'd have no chance of fighting them off. She heads out towards the crag, laying her face against the water at each stroke. The cold lake is seductive. It washes away Kai's voice, and the smell of his body metabolizing alcohol all night. It's an acrid smell that comes out on his skin and breath. The lake is pure. Her solitude in the middle of the water is dizzying. No one is here; no one who knows her; no one to call her back. No Kai. She lets herself sink until her head is just under the water. Now there's nothing on the surface to show that she's here. If Kai drove past all he'll see would be the lake looking back at him, smooth as an eye. She's a small disturbance, quickly ironed out. Her breath tightens and red spots thicken in front of her closed eyes. Her lungs hurt. She comes up, lies on her back, looks at the sky. The lake is beneath her, supporting her and drawing her down, caressing her, so cold that it leaves her with scarcely any sensation but the one of opening herself wider and wider against the body of the water. She belongs to the lake. The bike and her pile of clothes and the scuff of her footsteps in the sand are drifting farther and farther off.\n\nNadine flips over, pushes back her wet hair and looks at the crag opposite. She might swim to it. That would be the deepest part of the lake, where the rock goes down sheer into the water, and down and down to its haunted floor. She's not much more than a hundred metres offshore, and how wide is the lake here? About two hundred metres. She can swim a mile. She has swum a mile before.\n\n'In this cold? Some of these lakes go down to a thousand feet, remember what Kai said?'\n\nShe isn't swimming fast. She knows better than that. These are slow strokes that will carry her over the water. She watches her hands push through the water. This is all she has now: herself. Her arms and legs, her heart beating hard against the cold. What does the little heap of clothes and the bike add to that? Kai wouldn't think she could do it. He says she hasn't got enough fat on her to go swimming in cold water. He loves telling her what to do. If he was here now, watching...;\n\nBut he isn't watching. She's sure of it. He couldn't even find the road, he's so drunk. When he wakes up he won't remember anything. He won't remember the things he said, the things he told her. What she knows now and can't stop knowing. But once he finds that she's gone, won't he guess why? No reason why he should, unless he remembers last night. He'll think she's got tired of it all: his drinking, and the summer-house in autumn with winter coming fast. He knows she doesn't want him to touch her any more. Perhaps he thinks it's because of the drink or the way he doesn't bother to shave, or the smell of his breath, or because the bunks are narrow and uncomfortable, made for children. He's got plenty more bottles. Maybe he'll light the sauna, if he can be bothered. After ad, it's Friday. Friday night, smoke going up, smelling sharp in the autumn evening. No one to smell it or watch the line of smoke go straight up between the trees.\n\nShe stops swimming and looks back. The shore is as far away as the rock. The swans have come out from their island again, and are fanned out across the bay. It wouldn't be safe to swim back through them. They'd attack her. She'll have to go on. No use deciding now that she never meant to go to the crag, no chance of coasting slowly back to the sandy safe shore. She'll have to climb the rocks.\n\nThe lake is getting colder, or she's getting colder. It's pewtery on the surface, black underneath. Her arms are moving quite slowly and they look thin and weak in the water. She hears her gasping breath. She kicks hard. Her right foot is beginning to trail. It's never been as strong as the left since she twisted her ankle when she was twelve. Another rest. No. She's getting too cold. She'll shut her eyes and swim thirty strokes, then the rock will be much closer. And again. She counts aloud. The rock is getting near. It's bigger than she thought, and shiny and steep. There's got to be a ledge somewhere for her to climb. Otherwise she'll have to swim round to the bog and she might not be able to get out that way. She daren't risk getting stuck there. Not far now. Count another thirty strokes. The rock is so dark she's frightened to swim under it. What if there's a current? What if the water pulls her down?\n\nThe thing is not to panic. Think of numbers. Twenty, nineteen, eighteen...; The rock is quite close now. It's not as smooth as it looked from a distance. There are cracks \u2013 yes, and shelves. If she can just get her foot up...;\n\nBut she's so tired. Her breath is creaking and her arms are very slow. Her legs drag in the water. They aren't even kicking any more. She pants and scrabbles at the lake like a dog.\n\n'The thing is to come alongside the rock as if I'm a boat. Then I'll find a handhold.'\n\nHer right hip bangs hard against the rock. She looks down and sees blood fanning out into the water, but she can't feel anything. No. No. Don't look down. Try again. This time she sculls in on her back, her feet towards the rock, feeling for projections. The rock won't let her cling. It's like a big unfriendly body shaking her off. She isn't going to be able to get out. A bubble of panic rises, trapping her breath. No. No. Try again. This time her feet catch a slight shelf under the water. Now, a handhold. She scrabbles again, but it's wet and slimy and she falls back into the water. Try. Try. This time hold it harder. The handhold lasts for a couple of seconds and she kicks desperately, flings herself upward, wedges one foot in the crack in the rock and spread-eagles herself, leaning in against the cold crag. She's up. She's out of the lake. The water only reaches her knees. Her fingers are numb on the rock, dead-white. She's going to fall back. She'll never climb to the top. Her legs are shaking too much. Then she sees that she doesn't have to climb, because the crag is seamed with ledges. She can follow this ledge round until it's safe to step down into the scrub. Inch by inch, she moves around the crag until there's earth below her, not water. She unsticks her hands from the ledge above and lets herself roll into the rough grass. She lies still, looking at the blades of grass criss-crossing in front of her eyes. She can't see the water. She's done it.\n\nCold. She's got to get up. She rummages, tears off a clump of grass and rubs herself as hard as she can, all over her body. It would be stupid to die of exposure after managing such a swim. And she's done it. She hasn't drowned. Kai would have been sure she'd drown. The cut on her hip's not so bad after all \u2013 already it's slowed to a rusty trickle of blood. It's on her side. She's won. She's done it. After this everything's going to be easy. She can get back to the beach if she keeps to the edge of the trees and doesn't cross the bog. Any idiot can avoid that sharp, deceptive green. It's not far, and if she moves fast she'll get warm. She's got her dry clothes to put on, and a sweater in her cyclebag, and she can eat her chocolate. At the station buffet there'll be hot coffee and sausages.\n\nThank God, there's no wind. She scrubs harder with the grass, triumphantly, feeling the blood sting its way to the surface of her body, feeling her skin hurt and tingle. The lake is glassy. It settles as placidly as it would have done if she was twisting down and down through pleats and currents of cold, head over heels, slowing as the current tilted her pale body over and over like a starfish doing cartwheels until it bumped and settled in the silt. But she is alive. She's made it.\n\n'I've done it. I'm alive. Enid's dead. Enid is dead, but I'm alive. No. It doesn't have to be like that. Enid is dead, and I am alive. Enid's dead, and I am alive.'\n\nEnid. She sees her, walking away in her black reefer jacket and those black trousers with a strap under the foot which she calls slacks. She walks away quickly, frail and jaunty, the beret on her head hiding her grey hair and the delicate pale scalp which shows between its strands.\n\n'Enid,' whispers Nadine, but she can't make the figure walk less quickly, or turn, or show her face. 'Enid, I'm waiting for you.'\n\nNadine stands. She is naked. Her nipples are puckered like blackberries, her breasts taut in the cold air. Streaks of mud and grass slime run down stomach, buttocks, thighs. Her feet are black with mud which has oozed up through the crevices between her toes. She smells of lake water.\n\nNadine looks down her body. She's lost weight over the past couple of weeks, and there are concave shadows on the insides of her thighs. Maybe her breasts have shrunk too. She will not be worth as much now. If she put on her white dress again it would not ding and slide over her flesh, giving glimpses of breast and thigh. It would hang a little loose on her, wrinkling disappointedly, sexless as her mother's wedding-dress.\n\nIt doesn't matter. This body is for her. It is not for looking at, unless she chooses. But it's cold here, much too cold to stand. The water shivers, pulled by a breeze. A bird she doesn't know calls from the marsh with a sound like winter. The hunters will soon be here, in their greens and browns and greys, with their guns over their shoulders. Already they are oiling their guns, putting dubbin on their boots, buying cartridges. Nadine moves. Close to the wet ground, weaving her way, she works along the reeds. There's the little beach, its sand bright although there is no sun on it. Suddenly three ducks take off from the reeds in a long skittering launch off the surface of the lake.\n\n## _Twenty-three_\n\nThe policewoman who sits so long at Enid's bedside is kind as well as patient. She knows all about Nadine now. She reassures Enid that Nadine is bound to come and see her soon. She's probably gone away for a few days, that's all. Gently, she continues to probe. Who elselives in the house? What about visitors? And the landlord, Mr Toivanen, isn't it? Has Enid seen him recently? Enid probably notices the comings-and-goings, living alone, doesn't she? The policewoman is young, but she is not inexperienced. She catches Enid's small, cautious glances. She knows there are gaps in Enid's story, though she isn't yet sure where they are or why they are there.\n\nEnid is feeling so much better now. It's over two weeks since her accident. At first she couldn't talk for more than a minute or two because it hurt her head and muddled her. But every day she manages something new. She graduated to a commode, then to the slow shuffle down the ward to the toilets. Her arm is mending. It'll be a long time healing, but what can you expect at her age. Doctor is very pleased with her, says the nurse who has made a pet of Enid, crouching by the bed and hugging her after a sick, dizzy, successful walk right down the ward and back. Enid gets bad headaches, and she can't remember things very well yet, but that's only natural, the nurses say. Once she starts eating properly things will get better. Enid prods Rice Krispies, composted with All-Bran, and gives a small, disbelieving sniff. Once she's got her strength back, she'll soon put these nurses right about what constitutes a healthy diet. No fruit to speak of, and when she asked for a vegetarian meal she got a four-egg omelette and banana custard.\n\nThe policewoman suspects that Enid's memory is under better control than Enid will admit. There are things she doesn't want to tell them. After all, she has been living in that house all the time. She must have seen things; heard things. God knows there's been enough going on. Several people are very interested indeed in Mr Toivanen and his business associates. Patiently the policewoman accepts another cup of tea and continues to talk and listen. Enid seems very fond of this Nadine. Nadine Light, aged sixteen. Another person whom the police are anxious to interview. The bruises on Enid's upper arms are fading, but they have been photographed. They are the kind of bruises caused by hands, gripping hard. Something has happened in that house. From all directions the floodlights of inquiry switch on to the confused night and morning which Enid can't quite remember. One old woman has fallen downstairs. The floodlights throw shadows and ding up patterns.\n\n'Who else was in the house the night you had your accident? Can you remember?'\n\nEnid's hands move on the sheets. She crisps a corner of sheet between her fingers. Her lips move. In a feeble whisper she gives Vicki's name. The policewoman leans forward and writes in her notebook. Enid's eyes are half shut, but her fatigue and weakness don't prevent her from giving a photographically accurate description of Vicki. Then she appears to sleep, limp after her effort. What else swims in the sea-cavern called memory? Far down the ward a door slams, a cry comes once and is cut off. It floats, lost in the white disinfected air above the beds. Nadine in her bed. Kai on the stairs \u2013 or was that another time? Nadine was crying. Enid sees the dark shadow of Nadine's hair on the pillow.\n\n'I hope she hasn't gone off with her Kai,' she says aloud. 'He's no good to her. Just like Caro.'\n\n'Who's that, Enid? Can you remember?'\n\n'They didn't hang Caro. She went to prison,' whispers Enid, and shuts her eyes. They are there again, Sukey and Caro in the beautiful fields of summer grass. Soon the mower is going to come and cut them all: cocksfoot and quaking grass and York shire fog. It might be tomorrow. The weather is perfect for mowing. A cottage door opens and a man comes out, walks down the stone-paved path lined with tufts of pinks and cherry-pie, and leans over his back gate looking down the fields. He is the mower. His scythe is whetted. He looks at the red streaks of sunset and the clear green evening sky with one star budding in it. He smells the air.\n\nThe ripe grasses bow and dip in the summer wind as if someone is stroking them. Sukey comes first, Caro after. Sukey's dress blows against her body and her beautiful tanned round arms. She shields her eyes against the sun and laughs. The soft welcoming wind cups her cheeks, which are rosy under their tan.\n\n'Darling,' murmurs Enid, lying in her plain white hospital bed. Classic FM leaks from the Walkman of the woman in the next bed. 'The most beautiful music in the world...;' The bed rocks too, gently, not quite anchored on the glassy floor.\n\nSomeone is standing over her. A nurse with a big red-faced smile.\n\n'There's a friend of yours here to see you, Enid,' she says, delighted to be bringing good news. Enid hasn't had a single visitor yet, apart from the police. Enid opens her eyes. The policewoman seems to have gone. And there, coming down the ward \u2013\n\n'Nadine!' says Enid. Nadine sits on the policewoman's chair, leans forward and kisses Enid. Her young soft lips press into Enid's dry cheek. She smells of a new perfume, and she's wearing clothes Enid hasn't seen before. She looks elegant, older, thinner.\n\n'Silly girl, you went off with him, didn't you? After all I told you,' she grumbles. Nadine smiles and takes Enid's hand. Enid goes on, 'Where is he, he's not with you, is he?' and her face is suddenly shrunk and panicky.\n\n'No, he's not with me. He won't be coming back to England.'\n\n'But you came back.'\n\n'Yes.' Nadine hesitates, folds Enid's hand between her own. The bed has steadied again. Enid knows where she is. How funny people's faces look upside-down, even Nadine's. 'The thing was, Enid, I heard you were dead. I came back because I thought you were dead.'\n\n'You heard about my accident,' says Enid.\n\n'Accident,' says Nadine. I know about all of it. I came back to tell the police what really happened.'\n\n'But I'm not dead, dear, am I? You don't want to go telling all that to the police. You know how they get muddled up if you start telling them things. Anyway, you were asleep. How could you have known what was going on? You'll never get rid of them. There's a policewoman round here all the time, ever so nice she is, but she's got her job to do. She'll be listening somewhere.'\n\n'The sister says you're much better.'\n\n'Oh, well, she should know, shouldn't she, dear? You ought to have seen me when I first came in. You'd have thought I was dead, all right. I was unconscious for a whole night and a day, you know. I was in intensive care.' Regret that Nadine can't now see her at her worst and appreciate the miracle of her recovery crosses Enid's face.\n\n'Don't make me sorry I missed it,' says Nadine. She strokes Enid's forehead. Enid's hair is brushed straight back in tight strands over her scalp. The liver-coloured age spots on her cheeks stand out against the whiteness of her pillow. Her Viyella night-dress has a demure high collar, buttoned up. She looks like a small, well-looked-after child.\n\n'Where did you get that night-dress, Enid?' she asks. 'What happened to your pyjamas?'\n\n'Oh, there was no time to think of anything like that, dear,' says Enid proudly. 'I was an emergency.'\n\nThey smile at one another. It's another beautiful day, and Nadine has brought a big bunch of bronze chrysanthemums which she lays down on the bed in a sheath of crackling white paper. Their smell excites Enid. It makes her think of autumn, and things beginning. There's nothing like a touch of frost to get the blood running in your veins. Nadine delves in her carrier-bag and gets out a bag of russet apples.\n\n'I'll have to get the nurse to cut them up for me,' fusses Enid.\n\n'Can't you manage them? I'd have got grapes, only these looked so nice.'\n\n\"Course I can manage them. That young nurse over there, look, don't let her catch you staring \u2013 that's Jackie. She's a good girl. She'll do anything for me. She'll peel them if I ask her.'\n\n'You've got her where you want her, I can see that.'\n\n'Oh, well, I'll be home soon,' says Enid and sighs. Her eyelids droop and her fingers tug fretfully at her high collar.\n\n'Don't you want to leave the hospital?'\n\n'It's nice in here. They're all very good to me, but I'm better off in my own place. A social worker came to talk to me about sheltered housing.'\n\n'Is that what you want?'\n\n'It's not what I want,' says Enid with the first touch of her old sharpness. 'It's what I can get. I can't go back _there,_ now can I? With that Tony about, and, for all you say, your Kai likely to pop up again like a jack-in-the-box. What with air travel these days, who can tell? I don't think I should feel comfortable.'\n\n'Tony won't stay. He'll be gone before you're out of hospital. He wants to move back to Manchester.'\n\n'No doubt he's got business there as well, dear. Still, give him his due, he _was_ the one who called the ambulance. Otherwise I'd have been lying dead on the floor, that's what the doctor told me,' invents Enid. 'You wouldn't have thought it of Tony, would you? It just shows you should never judge people too harshly. He hasn't been in to see me, though.'\n\n'He told me you were in here. I went to the house first.'\n\nOh, yes, thinks Nadine, Tony was more than ready to leave for Manchester, but the police had told him to stay put for the time being. Until they'd finished their inquiries. He had been on the phone when she opened the front door. He looked at her, pressed the silence button, then thought better of it, cut his conversation in a couple of words and turned to Nadine. His face was yellow and tired. He looked older than Nadine remembered, and somehow much worse, as if lots of small changes which were just about to happen in his skin and eyes and expression had happened all at once and together. Or maybe she was the one who'd changed.\n\nHe was suspicious of her. He wanted to find out what Kai had told her, and how much she knew. He padded round her with questions like a cat. It was the business he was thinking about, of course. Always the business. That wasn't dead yet. He was going to go back to Manchester, he had contacts in Manchester, as well as all his family. There was no end to it. If only he'd just go. Vicki would be on her way too, no doubt. Whatever happened, she'd bob up somewhere, with her tan and her gold bracelets and her good advice. Vicki was waterproof.\n\n'What about the house?' Nadine asked Tony. 'What's going to happen about it?'\n\n'We'll get rid of it. It'd never've worked out. We bought at the wrong time.'\n\nTony got up from the telephone table and stretched himself. A big shadow stretched itself out too, on the opposite wall, and from the plane trees in the square Nadine heard a wood-pigeon coo in its throat. The sound bubbled into the house and made it quieter and emptier than ever. Suddenly she realized that there was no Enid upstairs, watching and waiting for her. Tony and Kai had got what they wanted: vacant possession. Except that now they'd got it they didn't want it any more. They wanted to get shot of the place, and everything to do with it.\n\nAnd of everyone. She watched Tony's shadow yawn across the opposite wall, almost touching her own shadow. Here she was in the empty house with Tony. He smiled. And now she was frightened, more frightened then she'd ever been in the summer-house with Kai, miles from anywhere. But it was stupid to be afraid of Tony. They'd lived together, eaten together, gone to London together. And he'd called the ambulance for Enid, hadn't he? He could just as easily have left her on the floor. Nobody would ever have known. She'll never actually known him hurt anyone. Yet she saw knives. She saw that the day in the kitchen when he bought them and the way the veal fell into ribbons under dull razor-edged steel. The colour of a sea-anemone. Her skin prickled and she moved back towards the window which was open a little at the top. She glanced down into the square but no one was passing. It was the dead middle of a cool afternoon. Tony stood by the telephone, looking at her and still saying nothing. But it was all right. She'll been in the house on her own with Tony dozens of times.\n\n'Empty, empty,' said the attic overhead.\n\nHer body tensed. A little grey breeze ran from the top of the window and feathered the back of her neck. _Go now. Go now,_ thudded her heart.\n\n'I talked to Paul Parrett this morning,' she lied quickly. His face changed. Now he'd got to guess how much she'd told Paul Parrett. Play for time.\n\n'Did you?'\n\n'Yes, he wanted to know how I was. He's really nice, isn't he?'\n\n'What'd you tell him?'\n\n'Oh, you know. This and that.'\n\n'About the police? Did you tell him that?'\n\n'He asked how you were. I said you were fine. I told him I'd be seeing you today.'\n\n'You want to watch what you say to him. He's got contacts. Influence.'\n\n'I wouldn't say that, Tony,' said Nadine. 'He doesn't need influence, does he? I mean, he's the one who makes things happen.'\n\n'Yeah. You could be right,' said Tony.\n\n'I know I am,' said Nadine, watching him. 'That's why I had a chat with him. I shan't be coming back here, Tony. I'm getting a flat. I'll be fetching my things in a few days.'\n\n'OK,' said Tony. 'O\u039a. If that's the way you want it. Remember me to him.'\n\n'He remembers you,' said Nadine. 'He's good at remembering.'\n\n'What about Kai? When's he coming back?'\n\n'I don't know. I'm not with Kai any more. I expect he'll be back,' she said, walking past him. The prickling in her flesh was gone. She turned her back on Tony and he watched her go out and up the stairs.\n\nShe went up to the bedroom which had been hers and Kai's. Their rust and gold duvet still lay plumply on the bed. She wouldn't take it with her, or any of the other things. Not the linen sheets, none of it. In the end Vicki'd been the last one to sleep with Kai in that bed. The sheets were still rumpled where the two of them must have tossed the bedclothes back. They hadn't had time to think about making the bed. They would have been in a hurry.\n\nThere were her clothes and a few books, and that was all she wanted. Not much to show for her time here and everything that had happened. It was less than she'd brought with her, because she'd left so much of her stuff at the summer-house. If she'd brought a case, she could have taken everything she possessed now. The bedroom door had been closed for two weeks, and the room smelled of cats. You never got rid of the smell of cat's piss once it had soaked into the wood, no matter how hard you tried to scrub it away. She looked upstairs towards Enid's room. She'll have to go back there too and help Enid pack, but not now.\n\nShe would ring Paul Parrett soon. She would ring with her credit card from a call-box. He'd told her it might take a long time to be put through to him, but if she waited he was always in reach of a phone. She must give her name. A powerful man. A man with a midnight garden high above the city, and ballerina apple trees, and a car to take him anywhere he wanted. There were worse things to want than what Paul Parrett wanted. His cr\u00eape bandages were starting to look as innocent to Nadine as the handcuffs children wear to play cops and villains. He'd liked her, she was sure of it. And surely she'd be safe with him, if she was ever going to be safe with anyone. If it mattered, thought Nadine. If safety mattered so much, after all. Because when you thought you had it, it was already gone. The cold lake is in her. It has gone through her skin, penetrated blood and bone, left her immune. She wants to see him, that's all.\n\n'So someone told you I was dead, is that it?' asks Enid in her hospital bed. 'And that's why you came back? That's the only reason?'\n\n'Yes.'\n\n'It was Kai who told you, wasn't it? I thought so. Still, they say a bad conscience is its own punishment, don't they? Even for your Kai. Think how Caro must have felt.'\n\n'He drinks all the time. He wants to cry but he can't. It's not just about you, it's other things. I can't do anything about them.'\n\n'So you came away.'\n\n'Not just because of that. I wanted to see you,' says Nadine. 'Even if you were dead. And now you're not, I'll come every day.'\n\n'Would you, dear?' says Enid eagerly. 'You know how the nurses like you to have visitors. I've just kept having that policewoman.'\n\n'I've got to look for somewhere to live,' says Nadine. 'I've got enough money for a deposit, and I'm going back to work.'\n\n'But they won't keep me here for ever.'\n\n'I could look for a bigger flat,' says Nadine. 'If you liked. If you'd be all right without a warden and things. You know, all those bells. I'll have to be out at work.'\n\n'Oh, I don't need a warden, dear,' exclaims Enid. 'Bells you ring if you fall over and buttons you push if someone you don't know comes to the door. I can't be doing with all that. I'd have my pension, I won't be a burden on you.'\n\n'I'll start looking, then. I'm staying in a guest-house at the moment, just till I get fixed up. I'll leave the number on your locker. I've still got some money. We can get all your stuff out of the house once we find a flat.'\n\nEnid's eyes have closed. She looks very tired and there are marks under her eyes. Nadine bends down and kisses her again, gently, on the fragile, papery temples. She smells of hospitals, not of herself. She would never have chosen that night-dress. One of the nurses must have gone out and bought it for her. She hasn't had any visitors.\n\n'Goodbye, Enid darling,' she says. 'I'll bring you some grapes tomorrow.' Enid smiles slightly but doesn't open her eyes. 'Get black ones,' she murmurs, 'I like those.' All she wants now is a nice sleep. She can relax at last. She can smell the bronze chrysanthemums Nadine has left on the bed.\n\nHalf-way down the ward the policewoman sees Nadine move away from Enid's bed. She steps forward purposefully and intercepts her. It's all very undramatic, think the watching patients disappointedly. A nod, a gesture. Sister's office door closes behind them. The low murmur of voices goes on and on, but even the patients nearest to the partition can't make out any of the words.\n\nPaul Parrett's telephone rings three times. The quick, immaculate tones of Security answer it. Nadine gives her name, and then there's a long pause while money is steadily drained off her credit card. She stares down the bank of telephones, imagining other people's conversations. A girl leans into her receiver, smiling. What's making her smile like that? She finishes her call loudly: 'I've got to go, Mum! Meet me off the 7.40, all right?' Nadine turns away and taps the glass rhythmically, then Paul Parrett's voice comes through on the line, fresh and vigorous.\n\n'Nadine! I've been wondering when I was going to hear from you.' Not if, thinks Nadine. When.\n\n'I've been away,' she says.\n\n'Did you have a good time?'\n\n'Not really...; Listen, I'm moving, that's why I'm in a call-box. I'm getting a flat with a friend of mine. I'll let you have the address once we've found a place.'\n\n'A different friend? Not Kai?'\n\n'A different sort of friend. I'm going to share the flat with Enid, she's the old lady in the attic I was telling you about. We don't want to stay in the house any more.'\n\nThere's a slight pause. Then his voice again, 'Well, it sounds as if a lot's been going on. So you'll be sharing a flat with Enid. Tell me about it \u2013 can I call you back, if you're in a call-box? This must be costing you a fortune.'\n\n'It's OK,' says Nadine. 'I've got a credit card.'\n\n'The thing is,' says Paul Parrett, 'when am I going to see you again?'\n\n'Soon. Really soon. But I've got to get Enid settled in first. She hasn't got anyone else, and she's had an accident. She's still in hospital.'\n\n'Is she all right?'\n\n'She's getting better. But any fall's serious at her age.'\n\n'Who's looking after her? Just you?'\n\n'Well, there's all the nurses. But I will, when she comes home. When we get the flat. They said at the hospital that she was doing really well. The sister said she was going to make a complete recovery.'\n\n'Good. Good.' Then suddenly, his voice urgent down the line, 'What does she look like?'\n\n'Oh, well, pale. But you'd expect that. Her arm's in a sling.'\n\nHe is silent. The line hangs dead between them. 'Does she need anything?' he asks. 'Money?'\n\n'She's got her pension. But it's a bit complicated \u2013 the accident. Listen, is it all right to talk \u2013 I mean, on this phone?'\n\n'Yes.'\n\n'It's to do with the accident, Enid's accident. The police are involved, but Enid's not saying anything. That's why I wanted to talk to you. I mean, it's one of the reasons.'\n\nSilence. Then, 'Yes. Go on.'\n\n'You know she was the sitting tenant in our house. And she was around all the time. Maybe she saw things. You know. Things to do with Tony and Kai.'\n\n'I can imagine.'\n\n'Or she heard things. The reason I phoned you, one of the reasons, is that I don't want there to be any more accidents.'\n\n'You think there might be?'\n\n'I'm not sure.'\n\n'That it might happen again?'\n\n'Yes. Not just to Enid, to both of us. But I don't think it would, if people knew I'd been talking to you.'\n\n'People being who?'\n\n'You sure this line is OK?'\n\n'Sure.'\n\n'Tony. Kai. Maybe others.'\n\n'Right. So the thing is, to make sure that these people do know?'\n\n'Yes. I did talk to Tony a bit today \u2013 I wanted to make it seem as if I'd already talked to you.' Her voice is thin, breathy.\n\n'He frightened you.'\n\n'Yes. A bit.'\n\n'O\u039a. That's no problem. I'll get in touch with our dinner host and I'm sure he'll pass the word on to all his friends. They've got a bit big for their boots,' says Paul Parrett. 'Starting to act as if they're in the big time. But they're not, you know.'\n\n'Aren't they? How do you know?'\n\nHe laughs. 'Oh, Nadine. They're a couple of amateurs, your Tony and Kai.'\n\n'Don't call them that.'\n\n'Anyway, they can be taken care of. No need to worry.'\n\nThere is more silence, then in a quite different voice he asks, 'How old are you really, Nadine?'\n\n'Why do you ask?'\n\n'No reason. Only, perhaps, people sound younger on the telephone.'\n\n'I'm sixteen.'\n\n'Sixteen,' he says.\n\n'Yes. Yes.'\n\n'You've got enough money?'\n\n'I'm all right for money.'\n\n'Let me have your new address as soon as you know it. And if anything worries you, anything at all, ring me up straight away. But it won't. It's all going to be OK.'\n\n'I dreamed about you last night,' says Nadine.\n\n'Did you?'\n\n'Yes, you were on a liner, we both were. It was dark red, you know the paint that stops rust? That colour. We had to sail down a street. The river ran between the houses and it was steep, like a street in San Francisco or being on a switchback.'\n\n'Did we get through?'\n\n'I don't know. The front of the liner reared up out of the water, then it went down. We went so fast everyone was screaming. Like on a rollercoaster. That hanging bit at the top and then you plunge.'\n\n'What colour was the river?'\n\n'Bright green. And little white clouds in the sky. And people were looking out of the house windows and waving. We could have touched their hands.'\n\n'Oh, Nadine,' he says. 'Nadine.'\n\n'I know. Silly, wasn't it?'\n\n'No. No, it sounds wonderful.'\n\nThey say goodbye. Nadine hangs up and leans against the transparent plastic hood of the booth. She is smiling. Really, what he wants is so little compared to what he is able to give. The way he makes her feel alive. How funny, Tony was right after all. He said she'd like him. What a long time it seems since she was on that train, going to London. And the girl jumped out of the train. He makes her feel twice as alive. Where's she going to find that anywhere else? Compared to Paul Parrett, Kai's half dead. Anything could happen.\n\nThat's what Enid was talking about, what she found at the Manchester Ladies when the doors opened and she saw the lights and the mirrors and the flowers and flames leaping against their reflections. And Sukey made all that happen. Sukey's energy. Sukey lapping Enid round with it. And it was love, argues Nadine, though the newspapers had a different word for it.\n\nHundreds of miles north the wind sifts across the forest. The birch grove by the lake grows lighter daily as leaves fall. The forest is getting ready for its yearly transformation, when light pours upward from the snowy ground. The birches strip themselves and stand naked, ready for the snow. The evergreens darken as pale grains of sun hit the forest floor. Wind ruffles the lake, fish sink into its silt for the winter, and grass, leaves and rushes are tinged with brown. It won't be long before the marshes freeze. In their apartment in Tampere, Matti and Marja Linna plan the extension they will build to their summer-house next spring. The children are getting older and they need more space. Marja hopes that the doors and windows she fastened so carefully on their last visit will remain secure against the winter storms. Neither of them thinks of Kai Toivanen. He was a friend once, but they haven't heard from him for years and he has gone out of their address books. Their friends are parents of young children, like themselves.\n\nIt is cold now. The birch leaves that remain are yellow, and the sap is sinking in the young pines. Soon summer-house and sauna will be under the snow. The lake by the summer-house will freeze until the ice could support an army of skaters, but no one will set foot on it. The lake where the swans nested and Nadine swam will freeze too, until it's possible to walk safely to the island and to the black crags which are shaped like a head and shoulders. Snow will cover the ice, and the wind will blow it into stiff peaks and curves. It will harden, then new soft snow will fall, covering the scar marks of birds' feet and falling branches. There will be footprints too: perhaps a dog, perhaps something more savage and lonely, looking for company. In the long, silent, lightless winter a wolf could become a man, or a man could become a wolf. A man can burn with vodka until he doesn't feel the cold, and when at last he does it's only very slowly, like sleep. A child stands for hours on the snow crusted ice, waiting for the snow-woman to find him and cradle him to her cold heart.\n","meta":{"redpajama_set_name":"RedPajamaBook"}}
+{"text":"\n\nOther Books by Eric Taub\n\nGaffers, Grips, and Best Boys: Who Does What in the Making of a Motion Picture\n\nTaurus: The Making of the Car That Saved Ford\n\nContributor to:\n\nThe New York Times Circuits: How Electronic Things Work\n\nThe New York Times Practical Guide to Practically Everything: The Essential Companion to Everyday Life\n\nTo Carol, the love of my life\n\n\"Technology makes it possible for people to gain control over everything, except over technology.\"\n\n\u2014John Tudor\n\n\"Once a new technology rolls over you, if you're not part of the steamroller, you're part of the road.\"\n\n\u2014Stewart Brand\n\nIntroduction\n\n1. The Computer: It's What Makes Everything Possible\n\nWhy Shouldn't I Buy a Windows Computer? It Seems As If Everyone Uses One\n\nIs One Type of Computer Better to Use on the Internet?\n\nWhat Is the Best Internet Browser?\n\nThe Windows Operating System Has More Programs Available. More Choice Is Better, Right?\n\nAren't Apple Computers Much More Expensive Than Windows Machines?\n\nI Hear That Apple Computers Are for Artistic People, and I Consider Myself to Be Creative. Will I Be Stymied by a Windows Computer?\n\nSo Why Shouldn't I Buy a Windows-Compatible PC?\n\nBut I'll Save a Lot of Money with a Windows Machine, Right?\n\nAren't Windows Machines Much Easier to Use Than They Used to Be?\n\nWhat Are the Reasons to Buy a Mac?\n\nAren't All Computers Built by the Same Handful of Chinese Companies?\n\nIs It Really True That Macs Don't Get Viruses? That Sounds Like an Urban Myth.\n\nCan I Get the Programs I Need for a Mac?\n\nComputers Scare Me. What If the Computer Crashes?\n\nWhat If Restarting My Computer Doesn't Solve the Problem?\n\nIf I Use My Computer to Store All My Documents, Photos, Movies, and Music, How Do I Find Everything?\n\nHow Do I Find What I'm Looking For on the Internet?\n\nHow Can I Make Sure I Don't Lose All My Digital Stuff? I Keep Hearing Horror Stories About Getting Hacked. Or What If My Computer Is in a Fire?\n\nWhat Happens If My Backup Hard Drive Breaks?\n\nWhat's the Cloud?\n\nHow Do I Get My Stuff into the Cloud?\n\nIs the Cloud Just for Backing Up My Files?\n\n2. Computer Printers\n\nIs a Computer Printer Still a Necessity?\n\nWhat Should I Look For in a Printer?\n\nWhat Are the Newest Features of Today's Printers?\n\nWhy Is Printer Ink So Expensive?\n\nWhich Printer Brand Should I Buy?\n\n3. I Just Want to Watch TV!\n\nWhat Is High-Definition TV?\n\nIs Everything on TV in High Definition?\n\nHow Much Do These HDTVs Cost?\n\nHow to Choose a Good HDTV\n\nA Few Simple Rules about What TV to Buy\n\nWhat Do I Look for If I Want an LCD TV? An LED or an LCD?\n\nWhat Size TV Should I Get?\n\nWhat Do I Do with All the Picture Settings on the TV's Menu?\n\nGetting the Best Picture from Your HDTV\n\nBut Why Didn't This Work for My Blu-ray Disc Player?\n\nSharp and Sharper: DVD vs. Blu-ray\n\n3D TVs: Should I Buy One?\n\nHow Can I Get 3D TV Programming?\n\nWill My Blu-ray Player Work with 3D Discs, and a Few Other Things You Need to Know About 3D TV\n\nDo I Have to Wear Glasses When I Watch 3D TV?\n\nWhat Kind of Glasses Are There?\n\nPros and Cons of 3D TVs with Active and Passive Glasses\n\nDoes the 3D TV I Want Use Active (Expensive) or Passive (Cheap) Glasses?\n\nI Don't Like Glasses! Why Can't I Get a 3D TV That Doesn't Require Them?\n\n4K TVs: Higher than High Definition\n\nShould I Buy a 4K Ultra HD TV?\n\nAre There 4K Movies or TV Shows Available?\n\nIf There's No 4K Programming, What Good Is a 4K TV?\n\n4. DVRs and TiVos: Watch What You Want, When You Want\n\nWhat's the Difference Between a DVR and a TiVo?\n\nWhat's the Difference Between a DVR and a VHS Machine?\n\nHow Do I Set Up a DVR?\n\n5. Recreating the Sound of a Movie Theater in Your Home\n\nHow Many Speakers Do I Need?\n\nIf Five Speakers Are Good, Aren't Seven Speakers Even Better? How About Ten, or One Hundred?\n\n6. Surround Sound Technologies\n\nWhy Do I Want Surround Sound?\n\nI Can't Figure Out What Speakers and Audio Receiver to Buy, So What Do I Do?\n\nI'm Not Going to Drag Cables Across the Living Room Just to Get Speakers Behind My Sofa\n\nSetting Up Wireless Speakers in the Rear Is Just Too Much for Me\n\nWhy Can't I Just Use the TV's Built-In Speakers?\n\nDolby Digital, Dolby HD, DTS, DTS HD, SRS, THX: What Are They, and Which Are Important?\n\n7. Programming: How to Get It and How to Save Money\n\n8. Wires, Wires, and More Wires! Does This Plug into That?\n\nWhy Are There So Many Connectors in the Back of a TV?\n\nA Simple Guide to Connecting Everything Audiovisual\n\n9. Remote Controls: Why Can't We All Just Get Along?\n\nWhy Can't One Remote Be Designed to Control Everything?\n\nI Got Everything Set Up, But Now My Remote Doesn't Work!\n\n10. Getting More from Your TV\n\nWatching TV on Your Computer, and Vice Versa\n\nIs There Any Way to Watch Programming That Doesn't Originate from Where I Live?\n\nSo What's the Downside?\n\n11. Internet-Connected TVs\n\n12. Creating a Home Network\n\nWhat Kind of Router Should I Buy?\n\nHow Much Should I Spend?\n\nWhat Router Speed Do I Need?\n\nDual vs. Single Band\n\nWired vs. Wireless: Nobody's Perfect\n\nHow Do I Get the Internet into My TV, My Blu-ray Player, and My Xbox 360, All at Once?\n\n13. Should I Get Rid of My Landline Phone?\n\nWhat Alternatives Are There to Landline Phones?\n\nHow Can I Call Overseas Without Spending a Fortune?\n\n14. Everything Is Connected\n\nWhat Can I Do with Connected Devices?\n\nIs There Any Reason I Wouldn't Want Everything Connected?\n\n15. You (Used to) Light Up My Life: The New Light Bulbs That Will Change the World\u2014and Yours\n\nAre Standard Light Bulbs Being Banned?\n\nSo I'll Have to Use Those Ugly Compact Fluorescent Bulbs?\n\nAre There Any New Lighting Technologies on the Horizon?\n\nWhy Wouldn't I Want to Use an LED Lamp?\n\nHow Can You Motivate People to Spend More Upfront Just for a Better Bulb?\n\nShould I Buy LED Lamps Now or Wait for the Price to Come Down?\n\nWhere Do I Get LED Lamps?\n\n16. Simplify Your Life Away from Home: Android, iPad, iPod, iPhone, Oy Vey!\n\nWhat's an Android?\n\nHow Does the Android Experience Differ from Apple's?\n\nWhich Is Better? Android or Apple's iOS?\n\nWhat Are Apps?\n\nThen Why Do I Need an App If I Can Go to the Actual Web site?\n\nQR Codes: That Little Black Box with Patterns That Appears on Many Print Ads\n\nAren't Smartphones Very Expensive?\n\nHow Much Data Do I Need?\n\nCan I Use My Mobile Phone Overseas?\n\nErgo, If You Take a GSM Phone from the United States and Bring It to Europe, It'll Work, Right?\n\nSo If You're an AT&T or T-Mobile Customer, the Problem Is Solved, Right?\n\nBut What If I Can't Unlock My Phone, or It Won't Work in the Country I'm In?\n\n17. Tablets: Android and Apple\n\nWhat's the Difference Between a Kindle, a Nook, and an iPad?\n\nWhat Can't You Do with an iPad or Any Other Kind of Tablet?\n\nWhy Would I Want a Tablet, Whether It's an iPad or an Android-Based Device?\n\nWhy Wouldn't I Want a Tablet?\n\n18. Your Digital Life, Everywhere\n\nWhat's iCloud?\n\nBut I Don't Have iCloud\/iPad\/iPhone\/Mac. What Can I Do?\n\n19. Simplify Your Car\n\nBluetooth: Necessary or Not?\n\nDo I Want (or Need) GPS Navigation?\n\nShould the GPS Be Built into the Car, or Should I Get a Portable Unit?\n\nDo I Want a Backup Camera?\n\nShould I Get a Blind Spot Detection System?\n\nI Have Apps on My Smartphone. Why Would I Want Them in My Car?\n\n20. Satellite Radio\n\n21. HD Radio\n\n22. Buy This, Not That: The Bottom Line on Consumer Electronics\n\nDo I Need an Extended Warranty?\n\nHow Do I Choose a PC? How Do I Choose a Mac?\n\nWhat Tablet Should I Buy: An Android-Based Product or an Apple iPad?\n\nDoes an Android Tablet Offer Enough Apps?\n\nHow to Choose a Flat-Screen TV\n\nDigital Cameras\n\nThe Connected Car\n\nLighting\n\nPhoning to and from Abroad\n\nAcknowledgments\n\nNotes\n\nAbout the Author\n\nDoes this plug into that? How many times have you asked yourself that question?\n\nProbably often. If technology is supposed to change our lives for the better, then why is so much of it such a pain to operate?\n\nPerhaps with the exception of Apple, most consumer electronics companies seem to have no idea how the nontechie world lives. Just because they get it, they think everyone else should as well. And if you don't, well, who cares about you anyway?\n\nKids get it. Children not even able to talk know how to swipe their fingers across cell phones, imitating their parents looking at pictures on their Android smartphones or iPhones. But if you're not of that generation, chances are it's all a bit overwhelming, and if you've never heard of an Android phone, then it's definitely overwhelming. You know that the world is starting to pass you by when you tell a younger family member how exciting it was to get your first extension phone, and he asks, \"What's an extension phone?\"\n\nThe world entered an electronics revolution when technology changed from analog to digital. That began to widely occur in the 1980s, when personal computers were first introduced to the public. Before that, electronics progressed slowly. You may have graduated from a standard phonograph, to a hi-fi record player, to a stereo system, but even as you did, how they operated remained the same. Reel-to-reel audiotape, cassette players, and snapshot cameras were easy to use and easy to understand.\n\nThe switch to digital\u2014the encoding of all information as a series of ones and zeros\u2014brought with it a level of previously unimaginable features and complexity. Not only can the sounds and visuals of life be recorded digitally, but now digital attributes can course throughout an entire product.\n\nFor example, using an Android phone, you can take a high-resolution photograph and then, while viewing it, alter the tones and apply various effects; you can make the photo look old, saturate the colors, or turn it into a cartoon-like image. You can do these things because you can manipulate a digital copy of the image while viewing it on a screen.\n\nSimilarly, you can cut and paste text on screen, change the font, size, and color, and add a beautiful, visually complex border to a manuscript you're typing on a computer. Using a typewriter, the best you could do was to physically cut out text and then move it by taping it to a new location on another physical piece of paper.\n\nAlthough those examples may be obvious today, they illustrate the power of the digital world; by turning everything into digital code, not only can you create works of art in a device the size of a pack of cigarettes, but you can turn on your oven or program your HDTV recorder from across the globe. You can recreate the sound of a large concert hall in your apartment. And one day, you'll be able to take the activities you've started at home\u2014whether that's a movie you're watching, a book you're reading, or your blood pressure\u2014and continue them as you move throughout your day, from the house to the car, to a flight across the country.\n\nWith each added feature comes an exponential increase in complexity, which means that learning a new product often becomes a more involved and convoluted task. But if you're the type of person who wants to stay on top of all the latest gadgets and trends and technologies, there's an easy way to do it.\n\nJust read this book.\n\nDoes This Plug into That? isn't an idiot's guide to technology, because if you're reading this, you're probably not an idiot. Rather, you're probably someone who wants to use a lot of technology that's popular today, but you want it to just work, without having to know a lot of acronyms, arcane terms, and the theory behind the technology.\n\nThink about it: You know how to drive a car, but you probably don't know how to fix one. When TVs were picture tube sets, you knew how to change channels, even if you didn't know how the picture got on the screen. So why are you now expected to know which cable to use to connect a Blu-ray player to your TV or understand incomprehensible instructions to set up a wireless home network?\n\nWhen I was researching my book Taurus: The Making of the Car That Saved Ford, the company's head of design asked me whether I knew how they decided where on the dashboard to put the air conditioner vent. I didn't.\n\n\"We don't decide,\" the designer told me. \"The engineers decide to put it wherever it's easiest for them to place it.\" The company was sacrificing the ability to create a good design, one that would please a customer, in order to make life a little easier for its engineers. That's too often the state of today's technology pleasures. The engineers design the products and write the manuals, and then they don't understand why no one can figure out how to use them.\n\nIf you want an understanding of how things work and what obscure abbreviations like BD-Live, HDMI, and TCP\/IP actually mean, don't read this book. But if you want a helping hand to simply and easily get things up and running, a technological Guide for the Perplexed to easily integrate gadgets into your life, and an understanding of why in the end any of this is important, you've come to the right place.\n\n1\n\nThe Computer: It's What Makes Everything Possible\n\n\"I was the first person at the USC School of Religion to do my Ph.D. qualifying exams on a computer. People thought this was cutting edge.\n\nTechnology for me is simply a cost\/benefit analysis. I love the Internet. It's right next to Prometheus in importance. I get to meet other peoples' minds. In two hours I can become fairly well educated. It's electrifying.\"\n\n\u2014Rabbi Mordecai Finley, Los Angeles\n\n\"A computer is like an Old Testament god, with a lot of rules and no mercy.\"\n\n\u2014Joseph Campbell\n\nThe home computer has long since passed from an expensive luxury to a necessary tool for everyone in modern society. Whether you live in the United States or Uzbekistan, not having a computer cuts you out of the mainstream of life.\n\nYoung adults in Vietnam create animated films in their homes for Hollywood studios and e-mail the files back to North America. Students in undeveloped countries are using inexpensive laptops powered by solar cells to help them learn. And of course, everyone is exposed to this through Facebook, Twitter, and many other social media Web sites.\n\nNot owning a computer, or some sort of computing device such as a smartphone or tablet, is as debilitating as not owning a telephone eventually became in the twentieth century. You simply can't communicate effectively without one.\n\nThe debate over what type of computer to buy has been raging ever since the dawn of home computers. Screen size, included software, and, with the debut of Apple's Mac in 1984, the type of operating system continue to be matters of heated discussion. Both camps, Apple aficionados and PC lovers, have good points about why their technology is better. Which one you choose depends on which solid reasons to buy apply to your situation.\n\nFor example, if the only thing you like about one particular laptop is that it has a longer battery life but you never use a laptop for more than a few minutes at a time, then battery life shouldn't be important to you. That applies to all electronic products: Don't allow yourself to be wowed by features you'll never or rarely use. Look at a product's specs, test its performance, and buy based on your needs, not those of the salesperson or manufacturer.\n\nWhy Shouldn't I Buy a Windows Computer? It Seems As If Everyone Uses One\n\nNearly everyone does. If you like being one of the crowd, you'll certainly feel more comfortable using a Windows machine\u2014or an Apple iPad or iPhone. Being part of the majority has its advantages. You know that there will be plenty of people to whom you can turn when you run into a problem. The more popular a technology is, the more people will work on it, understand it, and, in the case of computers, write software programs for it.\n\nIn the days before digital video recorders, when videotape recorders were in their ascendancy, there was an early battle between videotape formats. The system that eventually became the standard, known as VHS, was actually technically inferior in terms of picture quality to its rival, called Beta. But VHS won the battle for one simple reason: You could record up to two hours on a VHS tape, giving consumers the ability to capture an entire feature film on one VHS cassette but not on a Beta.\n\nIt didn't matter that most people actually didn't record feature films; just knowing that one could do it was comforting to enough people that VHS, with its poorer picture quality, eventually displaced Beta and became the single standard for home videotape recording. For several years, you could still buy a Beta machine and a dwindling supply of prerecorded Beta tapes. But enough consumers decided that wasn't the smart bet, because there was safety in numbers if one chose VHS.\n\nIn the same way, there is definitely safety in numbers if you choose a computer that uses the Windows operating system. And for many people that is very important.\n\nIs One Type of Computer Better to Use on the Internet?\n\nIt doesn't matter what type of computer you use. Macs and Windows machines are equally good for searching the Internet; downloading files, music, and movies; watching TV shows; and anything else you want to do. Both hardware platforms offer a range of Internet browsers, the programs that make using the Internet possible. Macs come with Apple's own browser, Safari, but you can also use a range of others, including Google's Chrome, Firefox, or Opera, to name a few. Windows machines can also use their own versions of Chrome, Firefox, and Opera, and they come preinstalled with Microsoft's Internet Explorer.\n\nWhich Is the Best Internet Browser?\n\nEach browser has its own fans. They all display Web sites in pretty much the same manner. The difference is how quickly each page is drawn and what ancillary features they offer. For example, with Apple's Safari you can save pages in a sidebar for reading later, even when you're not online (although these days, most people are continuously connected). Firefox gives you easy access to quick searches, but Google says its browser launches faster than the competition's.\n\nWhich browser you choose is a matter of personal preference. In the end, they all work about equally well.\n\nThe Windows Operating System Has More Programs Available. More Choice Is Better, Right?\n\nStudies have shown that more choice doesn't bring more customer satisfaction; it actually brings more anxiety. Too many choices lead to confusion, and too few obviously create a feeling of scarcity. I once entered a small food shop in a village in Belarus in the former Soviet Union and found just one canned vegetable: a brand of tinned peas from Bulgaria, stacked in a pyramid on an otherwise empty shelf to take up more room. I was not happy with my options.\n\nApple's iPhone store offers around one million apps. But in 2012, just the top 100 generated one third of all the money!\n\nYou won't use many of the hundreds of thousands of software applications that exist; in fact, you probably won't use more than three or four. Even the app developers complain that with so many apps, it's very hard for theirs to be discovered.\n\nIt's the same with computer software. You'll find many more software titles for the Windows PC, but you'll only use a handful. You'll probably want a Web browser (e.g., Internet Explorer, Firefox, Google Chrome, or Apple's Safari), an office suite (e.g., Microsoft Office), and easy-to-use music and video storage programs, such as Apple's iTunes and iPhoto.\n\nAren't Apple Computers Much More Expensive Than Windows Machines?\n\nWindows machines can be made by anyone, so the competition between the manufacturers drives down prices. You can get a plain Jane computer running Windows for a lot less than a Mac.\n\nI Hear That Apple Computers Are for Artistic People, and I Consider Myself to Be Creative. Will I Be Stymied by a Windows Computer?\n\nProbably not. The little-known secret is that for almost every computer use, there's either a version of the same software that works on both Apple and Windows machines, or there's an equivalent program from the same or another developer that can do an equally good job.\n\nFor example, Adobe makes Photoshop in both Mac and Windows versions; Microsoft's famous Office suite of programs also exists for both operating systems (although the designs are somewhat different). iTunes comes in Mac and Windows versions. Although Apple's iPhoto is only for Macs, there are Windows programs (such as Google's free Picasa) that do the same job of storing photos and allowing users to manipulate them.\n\nSo Why Shouldn't I Buy a Windows-Compatible PC?\n\nOne negative feature of Windows computers is that they attract many more viruses than Macs. Computer hackers around the world are always probing the Internet, looking for vulnerable computers they can infect with invisible programs that can search your computer for hidden account names and passwords, surreptitiously harness your computer to serve up harmful data to other unsuspecting users, or simply inflict wanton mayhem on your machine just for fun.\n\nThere are many more viruses that affect Windows computers than Macs. Whether that's so because Windows machines are an easier target or whether it's because Windows machines are more vulnerable is beside the point.\n\nThe bottom line: If you use a Windows machine, be prepared to find your computer under attack from evildoers, bad people around the world who will try to infect your computer with programs to steal your personal information, freeze your machine just because they can, and even recruit your machine in an unwillingly conscripted army of computers to attack Web sites and bring them down.\n\nBut I'll Save a Lot of Money with a Windows Machine, Right?\n\nGiven that anyone can manufacture a PC designed to run Windows, everyone has, and the results are not always good. Just because you got a PC on the cheap doesn't mean you got a bargain.\n\nAren't Windows Machines Much Easier to Use Than They Used to Be?\n\nYes, they are. The problem is that although Windows has gotten much easier to use now that it performs more like a Mac, many of its commands remain nonintuitive. If you have trouble remembering routines, a Windows machine may not be for you.\n\nWhat Are the Reasons to Buy a Mac?\n\nMacs are easier to use because they're easier to figure out. Many applications, including Apple's iPhoto photo storage program and iTunes (also available for Windows PCs), can be learned without reading any manuals. Apple's Time Machine backup system automatically backs up your hard drive, keeping multiple copies of its contents for months at a time so you can easily find a copy of a file that you created a year before.\n\nAren't All Computers Built by the Same Handful of Chinese Companies?\n\nThey may be, but each company that sells Windows PCs has its own set of build quality standards and tolerances it will accept. When you buy a Mac, you buy a computer made by Apple (or at least by Apple's contracted manufacturers), because only Apple can make computers that run its operating system. So you don't need to worry much about shabby build quality.\n\nIs It Really True That Macs Don't Get Viruses? That Sounds Like an Urban Myth.\n\nUnlike Windows PCs, Macs can be infected by only a few viruses. In twenty-seven years of using Macs, I've had two viruses, neither of which did any apparent damage to my computer, and they were easy to remove with a free antivirus program.\n\nFor years, the tech industry has been predicting that Macs would eventually get as many viruses as Windows machines as soon as the population of Mac users increased. The thought was that the cost\u2013benefit ratio for the hacking community would improve and make it profitable to write more viruses.\n\nIn 2010, Apple claimed that 20 percent of all new computers sold ran on the Mac operating system, and other stats say that more than 7 percent of American computer users have Macs, indicating a definite increase from about 2 percent a few years ago. Still, only a handful of viruses have attacked Macs, and most affect only a small minority of users.\n\nCan I Get the Programs I Need for a Mac?\n\nAs stated earlier, you may not find every Windows program in a Mac version, but most are available. Those that aren't typically have a similar Mac program that does much the same.\n\nComputers Scare Me. What If the Computer Crashes?\n\nIt's been a long time since computers passed from interesting but superfluous tools to must-have devices. That's true whether you live in Seattle or Soweto. Today, everything happens on the Internet, from education to paying bills to watching TV. But computers do crash. When Apple first introduced its OS X operating system, the company claimed it was so advanced that even if a program did crash, it would not freeze the entire machine\u2014only that program. It wasn't true. It hasn't happened often, but there have been times when one program freezing did cause my entire machine to lock up.\n\nThe Most Important Thing You Can Do to Fix Your Computer, Smartphone, iPad, etc.\n\nWhen your computer stops working\u2014whether it freezes, a program crashes, or it doesn't respond in some other normal way\u2014there's one thing that usually works to set things straight: Restart it.\n\nRestarting your PC (and your smartphone, tablet, portable navigation system, and most other digital devices) can cure many ills. It's like putting digital Drano in your machine: It flushes out the gunk and restores functionality.\n\nA real-life testimonial: I was unable to get my iPad to send mail, even though all the settings were correct. I deleted my account and reentered all the settings properly multiple times. The result\u2014nothing.\n\nThen I deleted my account once more, shut off the iPad, and reentered all the information after restarting. Everything was back to normal.\n\nWhat If Restarting My Computer Doesn't Solve the Problem?\n\nThere are too many ways a computer can go wrong to list them here. However, there is one trick that typically works: Search the Internet for a solution to your particular problem. More often than not, someone else has experienced the same thing. Before throwing up your hands in frustration, simply Google the keywords explaining what your problem is. You'll almost always find many others with the same problem and, usually, a solution. As a last resort, you can hire a live expert. But I've always found the answer I need by searching on the Web.\n\nIf I Use My Computer to Store All My Documents, Photos, Movies, and Music, How Do I Find Everything?\n\nWith giant hard drives now the norm, it's easy to file away tens of thousands of files and never run out of room. (I've got 40,000 received e-mails on my PC, plus thousands of photographs and scores of programs, among lots of other stuff.) Both Apple and Microsoft have made it pretty simple to locate your files, and their search procedures are similar.\n\nHow to Find Things on a Mac\n\nApple's Spotlight file-finding tool lets you search your entire Mac, or specific folders, for the file you want. You can look for a particular word in a file's title or a word in the body of the file itself.\n\nTo use Spotlight, you either click on the picture of the little magnifying glass in the upper right-hand corner of the screen or go to the word \"Find\" in the File menu, when you're actually in the Finder part of the Mac. (To get to the Finder, you click on the picture of the Mac happy face, which is the leftmost icon in the computer's program dock.)\n\nWhen you click on the Spotlight magnifying glass, you can type the name of a file or a word that appears in a file. You'll then see a list of appropriate files organized by type: all the matching documents, folders, pictures, and so on. If you click on the first phrase in the list, \"Show All in Finder,\" you'll see your results in a standard list window, with text that indicates where that file (or folder) resides.\n\nYou can also use Spotlight to do simple math calculations rather than opening up the calculator application or looking for your battery-operated one that's hidden under a pile of papers on your desk. Enter the calculation in the Spotlight bar using standard mathematical characters (e.g., 2+2, 2x2, 2\u20132, or 2\/2). The first listing under the Spotlight window will be the result of the calculation.\n\nHow to Find Items on a PC Running Windows 7 & 8\n\nPoint to the upper-right corner of the screen, move the mouse pointer down, and then click \"Search.\" Type the search term in the box. As you type, files containing that word will appear.\n\nIf you're looking for a certain app, or setting, or file, then click on that same word (app, setting, file).\n\nIn Windows 7, you can also search in specific libraries, Microsoft's term for a collection of file types. There are four libraries shown on the left of the window: documents, music, pictures, and videos. These libraries don't actually contain the files. Rather, each acts as an organizing tool, showing you a list of all the documents, all the music files, and so on. If what you want is definitely music, you can open the music library and type in the search box the specific word that represents the file you're searching for. You can also modify your searches by adding qualifier filters, such as the date the file or folder was created. You can specify a date or simply choose \"A long time ago.\" You can search by exact name; you can exclude a word or search files of only a certain size. All these options are presented to you in the search box; which options you see are determined by the type of file you are looking for.\n\nHow Do I Find What I'm Looking For on the Internet?\n\nWhen searching on the Internet, I operate under this theory: Anything I want to know has already been asked by someone else. Without exaggeration, that has proven to be true 100 percent of the time; that's a good thing, because it makes searching the Internet much easier.\n\nWhen searching for a topic, whether it's news, an image, or a concept, use keywords without making the search too broad or too specific. For instance, if you are looking for a news report on a Texas judge who expects the United States to become a ward of the United Nations, enter terms such as \"Texas,\" \"United Nations,\" and \"takeover.\" Interested in a particular modestly priced digital camera? Don't just search for \"digital cameras\"; you'll get too many responses. Instead, search for \"mid-range digital camera best reviews.\"\n\nYou can include or exclude certain words to make your searches more accurate. For example, if you want to search for information on the jaguar animal, you can type (without the quote marks) \"Jaguar \u2013automobile\"\u2014Jaguar minus automobile\u2014to make sure your search results don't include the car by the same name. On the other hand, if you only wanted information on the automobile, you could type \"Jaguar + automobile\" (again without the quote marks). If you can't remember the various modifying marks, Google has a search page where it will put in the marks for you (google.com\/advanced_search).\n\nAlthough Google has become the search engine of choice for most, also try Bing (bing.com) and Yahoo! (yahoo.com) to expand your results.\n\nHow Can I Make Sure I Don't Lose All My Digital Stuff? I Keep Hearing Horror Stories About Getting Hacked. Or What If My Computer Is in a Fire\n\nThere are three\u2014not two\u2014things that are guaranteed in life: death, taxes, and the loss of the information stored on your computer or portable device.\n\nIt hasn't happened to you yet? Neither has death. But both will.\n\nHard drives fail (often unexpectedly). Lightning storms fry computer components. Portable devices such as smartphones just up and die. To prevent the disaster that could happen when you lose all your family photographs, your work documents, and your favorite music that you've spent hours transferring to your computer, there are two things you should do:\n\n\u2022 Back up everything to an external hard drive.\n\n\u2022 Back up your essential files to the \"cloud.\"\n\nIf you're an Apple user, it's easy (perhaps you've heard that refrain before). Macs come with a program called Time Machine. Plug an external hard drive (using the included USB cable that comes with a hard drive) into your Mac's USB port. Then you just go to Time Machine in the System Preferences application (to get to it, choose \"System Preferences\" under the   [Apple] menu in the upper left of the screen, slide the on\/off bar to \"on,\" go to \"select disk,\" and select your external hard drive, and you're done).\n\nWindows 7 has a similar feature. In the Windows 7 operating system, click the Start button. Then open Control Panel; once there, click on \"System and Maintenance,\" and then click on \"Backup and Restore.\" If this is your first time, click on \"Set Up Backup\" and follow the instructions. Windows 8 calls its automated file backup system \"File History.\" To activate it, use your mouse to point to the upper-right corner of the screen, pull the mouse pointer down to show the Search box, and type in \"File History.\" Then click to turn it on.\n\nWhat Happens If My Backup Hard Drive Breaks?\n\nBacking up at home is great, but what happens if your home is flattened by an earthquake or a tornado? Or your home is flooded and your hard drive gets soaked?\n\nThe answer is in the cloud.\n\nWhat's the Cloud?\n\nYou may have heard the terms cloud computing, cloud-based music, and cloud-based backup. What they mean is simple: Files are stored in a bank of computers in some remote location. Typically, companies that provide cloud services have \"server farms,\" scattered all over the world. These farms don't have cows or sheep, just hundreds or thousands of hard drives electronically tied together that store information. When you read your e-mail from Google or Yahoo! or Apple's iCloud service, those messages are stored in the cloud, at the companies' server farms.\n\nSome companies are even storing their computer programs in the cloud. So rather than having to buy and install a program on your PC, you access a master copy that's on a remote server somewhere, via your Internet connection. That way, you're always using the latest version of the program (no updating necessary), and you don't have to worry that the program might get electronically corrupted or that you might lose the master disk with which you installed it.\n\nApple's iCloud service not only holds your e-mail (if you use an \"@me.com\" or an \"@icloud.com\" address), but it can also be used to store the digital files you've purchased from the Apple iTunes store. The servers even hold copies of music that you may have transferred from CDs to your computer; if you lose your copies you can download new copies from Apple (for an annual fee) or access the same music on your smartphone when you're in a distant location.\n\nCloud servers also make for great alternative backup locations. With a secondary cloud backup, you'll know that your data will always be safe if the backed-up files on your hard drive become inaccessible.\n\nDo You Back Up?\n\nIf you're like most people, it's likely that you don't back up your files, either on a local hard drive or in a storage space in the cloud.\n\nAccording to a study of Western Europeans conducted by Acronis, a backup company, 83 percent of respondents understand the need to back up, but only 15 percent back up once a week or more often, and 29 percent never back up.\n\nShould you back up? Absolutely. Should you back up in multiple locations? As my mother used to say, \"It can't hurt.\" Adding a cloud backup service to your backup is simple; several companies offer similar pricing plans and virtually foolproof instructions. Backing up to a remote location has an added benefit: When a new type of storage format makes hard drives obsolete, as it most definitely will, you won't have to worry about transferring your data to the newest technology.\n\nHow Do I Get My Stuff into the Cloud?\n\nIt's easy to back up your files to the cloud, and here are two services to consider: Carbonite (carbonite.com) and Mozy (mozy.com). There are others, but these two are among the easiest to use.\n\nFor about $60 per year, Carbonite lets you back up one computer, no matter how many files or gazillions of gigabytes you have on that PC or Mac. You don't get to back up additional computers for that price, nor can you back up files on an external hard drive that's connected to that computer. For that privilege, you'll need to pay an additional $40 per year.\n\nMozy charges $6 per month, or $5.40 per month if you pay for two years in advance. That price buys you 50 gigabytes of file backup, enough for most people. The company's Web site points out that 50 gigabytes equals more than six million e-mails, 7,500 photos, 8,500 music files, or 1,000 videos. Of course, that's just a rough estimate. If your movies are all six hours long or your photos were shot at a very high resolution, that number will drop.\n\nWith both Carbonite and Mozy, you simply download an application onto your computer. The programs walk you through the setup, and then they back up your computers automatically and continually.\n\nHint: How to Reduce Your Backup Size\n\nDon't back up your applications (programs such as Microsoft Office or iTunes); if you ever have to restore your entire computer because of a catastrophic failure, you can restore your applications from the original CDs, or you can download them again if you purchased them over the Internet. For safety's sake, you can always make backup copies of your programs on recordable CDs or DVDs as soon as you buy them.\n\nIs the Cloud Just for Backing Up My Files?\n\nCloud backup services aren't just for catastrophes. Once your files are in the cloud, you can grab one when you're away from your main computer that's being backed up.\n\nLet's say you're at your Aunt Martha's house in Evanston, and you want to give her a copy of that great brownie recipe you downloaded from the New York Times Web site. If you have the Carbonite or Mozy app installed on your Android or iPhone smartphone or tablet, you can find the file and download it on the spot. If you have a laptop with you, you can do the same thing just by going to the Carbonite or Mozy Web site, signing in, and accessing your file. You can search for it by name in the search box, or find it by navigating through the folders in which it's stored.\n2\n\nComputer Printers\n\nWhen people first began using computers, they printed everything. The idea of reading something on a screen or correcting a written document without using a paper version was anathema to a lot of users. Although the earliest printers typically cost up to $1,000, they were essential for many people. Today, printers that double as scanners and fax machines cost around $85. Their utility has increased, but the necessity of having one has gone in the opposite direction. That's because screens have become ubiquitous and we are now accustomed to viewing and manipulating our digital work without first making a paper copy.\n\nWe e-mail photographs and view merchants' bills on the screen. We store our photographs electronically, and when we want our friends to see them, we post them on Facebook or Instagram, show them on our iPads, or transfer them wirelessly from our computer or smartphone to our large-screen HDTV.\n\nIs a Computer Printer Still a Necessity?\n\nAt this point, it's easy to get along without a printer. But they still come in handy sometimes. Printing out directions from the Google Maps Web site is often easier than trying to read the map on your smartphone. You can wave your smartphone at the entrance gate to an event to show your electronic ticket, but it's more reliable to print a paper copy in case your cell phone battery dies just as you get to the front of the line.\n\nWhat Should I Look For in a Printer?\n\nBecause printers are now so inexpensive, you can buy a loaded one for a low price. For less than $100, you can get a machine that prints, scans, and faxes.\n\nLook for a printer that comes with its own e-mail address. The point isn't that you can send your printer love letters; with an embedded e-mail address, you can e-mail the printer a document (or photo or whatever), and you can print it directly, without having to first open the document on your computer and then tell the printer to make a copy. With an e-mail address attached to a printer, you can e-mail a document to it from anywhere in the world, and it'll print. That's a great way to send photographs of your trip to Machu Picchu to your parents without asking them to fiddle with e-mail attachments and computer commands.\n\nToday's printers also come with wireless capabilities. You no longer need to tether your printer to your computer with a cable. Instead, a wireless printer lets you send files to the printer without a physical connection between the two. That's handy if your printer is far away from your computer, and it allows other computers in your household to send files to the printer, as long as they're all operating on the same wireless network (and computers in one household typically are). If you have a tablet computer, such as an Android tablet or an iPad, you can print a photograph that you received in an e-mail by just sending the file to the printer wirelessly.\n\nWhat Are the Newest Features of Today's Printers?\n\nPrinters now come with their own apps\u2014applications that add functionality by downloading information from the Internet. For example, with a Google Maps app, you can look up directions right on the printer and then print those directions without using a computer to first access the map.\n\nThe Fandango app allows you to look up show times and print tickets from the printer. If you're a 60 Minutes fan, you can download and print transcripts from the show directly to the printer.\n\nThe truth is, though, there's really not that much use for apps on printers. This seems to be another case of an industry running scared. Printer executives see how popular apps are on smartphones and computers, so they figure they'd better put them on printers as well. Soon we'll see apps on electric toothbrushes (they're already on pens). But just because you can do something doesn't mean you should.\n\nWhy Is Printer Ink So Expensive?\n\nIn 2011, I asked Johan de Nysschen, then-president of Audi USA, why the company charged so much for its small A3 sedan. \"Because we can,\" he answered. And that's why printer ink is so expensive: because companies such as Hewlett-Packard can ask a high price.\n\nPrinter giant HP charges a pittance for its printers but a lot more for its ink. It's another application of the razor and razor blade approach: Charge a little for the hardware device, but then charge a lot for the products you need to make that hardware work well. If you make those products better than your competitors', consumers will continue to buy your consumable products. Kodak tried to take a different approach. Its printers cost a bit more, but its ink generally costs less than HP's. However, that strategy failed; Kodak is now out of the printer business.\n\nBecause most people don't do much printing, the price difference in ink has become negligible for many. In my own work, I print three to four pages per week. A typical HP cartridge lasts me for months.\n\nWhich Printer Brand Should I Buy?\n\nPrinters made by big names such as Canon or HP work well, and they are simple to set up: Plug the printer into the computer and the power cord into the wall. The computer automatically recognizes the type of printer you have and presents you with the proper print instruction box when needed.\n3\n\nI Just Want to Watch TV!\n\n\"I've always been a populist. I'm interested in how to use technology as a way to communicate, play, and let people express themselves.\"\n\n\u2014Steve Mayer, co-founder, Atari\n\nRemember when watching TV was easy? Here's how we did it:\n\n1. Turn on TV.\n\n2. Change channel.\n\n3. Watch show.\n\n4. Go to refrigerator.\n\nThings got a bit more complicated with the invention of the remote control (a great boon for nascent couch potatoes). And then when cable came along, we got a lot more channels, but it also became harder to find what we wanted. We had to navigate program guides and figure out how to record things, first on a VHS machine and on a box the cable or satellite company gives us to store programs.\n\nWith giant flat-screen TVs, we don't just want to watch TV; we want to recreate the theater experience in the home: huge HDTVs, multispeaker surround sound, extraordinary picture quality from Blu-ray discs, streaming movies from the Internet right into the set. It all makes for a great experience, but it comes at a price: confusion.\n\nEvery new box in your home comes with its own remote. If you're like most of us, you've got a coffee table filled with five or six of them: for the TV, the Blu-ray or DVD player, the video recorder, the Xbox or PlayStation, and the home theater receiver. If you're still living in the past, you may even have one for the VHS machine you never use except to watch the tape of the quiz show you were on in 1970.\n\nNow you've got a flat-screen TV that's probably as big as the bathroom in the house you grew up in, and you're using it to watch high-definition TV. Or are you?\n\nI've got an HDTV. So I'm watching high-def TV, right? Here's how to find out: Is the picture super-sharp and wide as well? If so, you're watching high definition. If the screen is wide but the picture itself is squarish, you're not. If you haven't yet bought an HDTV, this is what you need to know.\n\nWhat Is High-Definition TV?\n\nIt's a TV that shows images that are much sharper than on a regular TV. What's the big deal? The sharper the image, the easier and more fun it is to watch. If you're an old-timer, remember how crummy the picture looked when you watched a VHS tape? You may have gotten used to it, but it wasn't very nice to look at. With a sharper image, you can sit closer to the screen, which makes the picture appear bigger and more in your face, like being at the movies. When it comes to TV, bigger and sharper is always better because what you're watching feels more immediate. It comes alive.\n\nHow Do I Get HDTV?\n\n1. Buy an HDTV set. If you don't have an HDTV, you can't see high definition.\n\n2. Get an HDTV cable or satellite box. Subscribing to HDTV generally costs more than standard-definition TV, but the cable and satellite companies typically will give you the special HDTV decoder box at no charge, often in exchange for a multiyear commitment. If they won't at first, just ask. Threaten to go to a competitor, and they'll usually give in.\n\n3. Tune to an HDTV channel.\n\nIs Everything on TV in High Definition?\n\nNo. If the channel you're watching delivers a wide-screen image on your HDTV, it's in high definition. If the picture looks squarish, like on the old picture tube TVs, then you're just watching standard, low-definition TV, but you're using an HDTV to do so.\n\nThe Secret Way to Get Lots of Free HDTV\n\nRemember when TV used to be free? You used rabbit ears or a roof antenna to pick up local channels. It still is free, but now it's even better. With the right-sized antenna you can watch local HDTV channels for free, just like in the old days. Thanks to digital technology, the space that those channels take up on the airwaves can be compressed so they take up less room, or \"spectrum.\" And with that extra space, you can see more channels from each broadcaster.\n\nSo channel 2, for example, can be squished down in size and be broadcast along with channel 2.2, 2.3, and so on, up to about five additional ones. Lots of broadcasters are doing this. Not only do you see the main channel you're familiar with, but with a digital antenna you'll also be able to pick up those \"subchannels,\" and on them you'll find music programming, arts, and even 24-hour news.\n\nWith a few rare exceptions, unless you get your TV channels using a regular antenna, you won't be able to see any of them. That's because most cable and satellite companies won't carry the subchannels. (Hint: They can't make any money carrying them.)\n\nHow Much Do These HDTVs Cost?\n\nA lot less than they did when the technology was new. Twelve years ago, an HDTV cost about $10,000 for a fairly small 34-inch screen. Today, $1,300 can buy you a much better-looking image in a set as big as 60 inches.\n\nSo should you just sit tight until the price drops further? There's no point in waiting. Cars may change only slightly year to year, but modern consumer technology changes rapidly. Anyway, the prices are so low that they can't drop that much more any time soon. The fact is that almost every big-name TV manufacturer\u2014Panasonic, Philips, Samsung, and Sony\u2014is losing its shirt selling HDTVs; the prices are so low they actually sell them at a loss just to keep their share of the market.\n\nHow to Choose a Good HDTV\n\nThe first HDTVs used picture tubes to create their images, just like the old regular TVs. Picture tubes make great images, but man, they are heavy. Remember how difficult it was to pick up a large picture tube TV? You either got a friend to help, or you did it yourself and then checked into the hospital for your hernia operation. Picture-tube HDTVs were even heavier\u2014more than 100 pounds. Just delivering the set to your house was about as easy as carrying a piano.\n\nFortunately, the TV industry came up with two different technologies that dramatically lightened things up: plasma and LCD. If you've heard lots of bad things about plasma\u2014the sets don't last long, they use a lot more power\u2014forget about them now. Whatever shortcomings plasma once had are long gone.\n\nA Few Simple Rules About What TV to Buy\n\nIf you want the best picture quality, get a plasma TV.\n\nIf you watch TV in a really bright room, get an LCD TV.\n\nPlasma TVs look especially dim in stores like Best Buy and Costco because they're lit by bright fluorescents. To make matters worse for plasma, the LCD TV manufacturers have a special \"retail\" setting to blast out their screens' brightness on the store floor. The brighter the image, the sexier it looks. And because LCD TVs can be made much brighter than plasmas, they always look better. That's great if you're watching TV in a fluorescent-lit room; but outside of a few apartments in Kazakhstan, I haven't seen many fluorescents in American living rooms. In normally lit rooms\u2014like those in your home\u2014the brightness of a plasma set is just fine.\n\nAnd you know those \"LED TVs\" you see advertised all the time? There's actually no such thing as an LED TV. It's a marketing gimmick. \"LED TVs\" are actually LCD TVs that use LED lights to create the TV's light source. It's just a way for manufacturers to create another category, confuse consumers, and hopefully get people to pay a bit more money.\n\nWhat Do I Look for If I Want an LCD TV? An LED or an LCD?\n\nAll the LCD TVs will soon use LED lamps, so you don't even have to worry about that.\n\nWhat Size TV Should I Get?\n\nBecause HDTVs can display sharper pictures, you can sit closer to the screen. Divide your viewing distance by 1.5 to 3 to figure out the diagonal size of the TV you should get. For example, suppose you're sitting 10 feet from the TV. Ten feet = 120 inches. 120\/1.5 = 80, and 120\/3 = 40. So buy a TV that has a diagonal screen size between 40 and 80 inches.\n\nWhat Do I Do with All the Picture Settings on the TV's Menu?\n\nMost people will buy a TV, take it home, turn it on, and figure they're done. That's not surprising; when picture tube TVs were the standard, I was amazed that consumers often seemed perfectly happy to watch an image of someone whose skin color made him look as if he came from another planet. Purple features don't seem to bother some people. It's surprising how many set their TVs to the \"vivid\" setting, which gives the picture an artificial, supersaturated look.\n\nTo make things easy for the average consumer, all TVs today come with a variety of presets, tweaks that tune the picture to look best in different lighting situations.\n\nFor example, in addition to \"standard,\" one Panasonic TV offers Vivid, Cinema, Game, Custom, and THX settings. Not to be outdone, and to make the choice even more complex, a Sony model lets you choose from Vivid, Standard, Custom, Cinema, Sports, Game-Standard, Game-Original, Graphics, Photo-Vivid, Photo-Standard, Photo-Original, and Photo-Custom. Whew!\n\nPanasonic recommends that you use Vivid in a bright room, Cinema in a darkened room (the picture is less bright and softer, like a movie), and Standard for \"normal viewing conditions,\" whatever that means. Sony's manual says that Standard should be used \"for standard pictures;\" Cinema is for \"film-based content,\" and Sports \"optimizes picture quality for viewing sports.\" But what if you're watching a sports movie or a live sporting event? Does that demand a Standard, Cinema, or Sports setting?\n\nThen there's Panasonic's special THX mode, which \"faithfully reproduces the image quality that the movie makers intended in order to provide the ultimate cinematic experience at home.\" So what's the difference between THX and Cinema modes? Officially, THX will give you a professional calibration of sharpness, color, brightness, and contrast, whereas Cinema will optimize the image to make movies look best. Cinema is trying to do the same as THX, but it's not the professional calibration.\n\nIn reality, you may not be pleased with either calibration. Choose what looks good to you as long as you're trying to create the best natural-looking picture, one that reflects the way the world looks. If your goal is to make people look as weird as possible, I can't help you. But if you want to recreate the world on your TV, what follows are some hints on how to make the adjustments yourself.\n\nWhat Is THX, and How Did It Get Its Name?\n\nWe've all heard that cool sound and seen that giant \"THX\" logo that often precedes movies in the theaters (you can see and hear it at is.gd\/XHyHML). But do you know what THX is? It's not a technology; it's a quality assurance system that \"guarantees\" that a movie will look or sound the way its creator intended.\n\nThe THX system has been adopted by companies such as Panasonic to ensure that the settings on a TV create the ultimate picture quality, not too washed out and not too saturated, with lifelike colors.\n\nThe name comes from its inventor, audio engineer Tomlinson Holman, and the \"X\" stands for \"crossover.\" He created it while working at George Lucas's company, Lucasfilm.\n\nGetting the Best Picture from Your HDTV\n\nIf the TV that looked great when you were shopping at Costco looks just average and disappointing now that you've brought it home, this section is for you. Most of today's digital TVs\u2014if you have a flat-panel LCD or plasma TV, your set is digital\u2014can present a great-looking picture, especially if you're watching in high definition. Here's how to tune your TV to get that great look.\n\nTurn Down the Lights\n\nAccording to Mark Schubin, a famous television engineer and Metropolitan Opera technical consultant, turning down the lights is the number one thing to do. If the room is too bright, you can't maximize the range from the whitest white to the blackest black. The wider the range, the more lifelike the picture will be. We've all seen pictures that are washed out and muddy looking. You don't want that in your home.\n\nIf you cannot lower your room's lighting, at least never let the sun directly hit the screen. If that happens, you'll be lucky to see any image at all.\n\nNext, Adjust the TV's Brightness Control\n\nThe brightness control adjusts the level of the blacks in the picture. (Shouldn't it be called the blackness control?) If the dark parts of a scene don't look black but instead look muddy, then the picture will look poor. While watching a dark scene in a movie, turn the brightness\/picture control down until the detailed areas in a dark part of the frame disappear, then turn it back up until you can just make out some detail.\n\nNow, Adjust the Contrast\n\nYou've gotten the blacks to look good. Like those laundry detergent commercials, you need to make sure the whites look white and not gray. But not too white: If you crank up the contrast too much, you'll think you're in a whiteout in Aspen. That's not good.\n\nThe simplest way to do the adjustment is to use a pattern on a tuning disc or one that is part of a THX-certified DVD, which will include picture-tuning instructions. Otherwise, find a bright scene in a movie\u2014a park on a bright day would work\u2014and then adjust the contrast so you can make out blades of grass, shadows, and folds on clothing.\n\nColor: More Is Not Better\n\nIf the colors on your TV screen look so rich you think you just smoked a joint, you've gone too far; too much color starts to look silly, not beautiful. Keep the comic book look for comic books. Make sure people's skin tones look pretty much the way they do in real life. In North America, there are two color adjustment knobs: color and hue. They interact, so after tuning one you may need to retune the other.\n\nWrite It All Down\n\nJot down the numbers of the settings, in case your dog or child steps on the remote and goofs them all up. Also, if you watch TV at different times of the day when the light changes dramatically, you'll want to go through the same process for each lighting condition.\n\nBut Why Didn't This Work for My Blu-ray Disc Player?\n\nIn olden days\u2014five years ago\u2014setting the picture controls on your TV changed them no matter what you were watching. Today, setting the controls while watching cable TV will often have no impact on the picture when you're watching a DVD or playing a video game.\n\nThis is a feature, not a mistake. TV manufacturers figure everything you have connected to the TV will create a different-looking picture; being able to adjust each one independently will give you more control. Whether you want that control is another matter.\n\nAbout Those Tuning Discs\n\nTo do the best job, you may want to buy a DVD or Blu-ray tuning disc. You insert the disc in your Blu-ray or DVD player, and it takes you through various tuning routines. For example, you'll see a pattern of vertical black and gray bars, and you adjust them so that one of the black bars matches the background of the image. Other test patterns help you set your picture's sharpness and color rendition to match the colors that a scene is intended to show.\n\nSome of the tuning discs you can choose from include Digital Video Essentials: HD Basics, the Avia II Guide to Home Theater, and the deftly named Spears & Munsil High-Definition Benchmark Blu-ray Disc Edition.\n\nTHX now sells THX tune-up, a $1.99 tuning app for iOS and Android devices that offers similar tuning routines to the various discs.\n\nIf you don't want to shell out the big bucks for a tuning disc or smartphone app, you can get the same setup patterns for free on many DVD and Blu-ray movie titles, such as Avatar, Star Wars: The Complete Saga, and Toy Story. They and others include THX Optimizer, a range of calibration patterns created by THX Ltd., the company whose familiar certification logo precedes many movies. To get a better sense of what's involved here, go to bit.ly\/A5zlix for a primer on display calibration, including what you have to do and what it does.\n\nFilters are included with tuning discs; if you're using a THX pattern that's included on a DVD, you can purchase a set of blue filter glasses from THX's Web site (www.thx.com). Depending on the country in which you live, a pair will cost between $4.50 and $6.00.\n\nTHX's Web site also has a list of the more than 300 DVD and Blu-ray titles that have the THX Optimizer calibration program built in. To see it, go to bit.ly\/X42Sft.\n\nSharp and Sharper: DVD vs. Blu-ray\n\nRemember how bad VHS tapes looked, even on a regular picture tube TV?\n\nThe invention of DVD dramatically improved picture quality and added additional features, such as multiple audio tracks (in case you wanted to watch an Iranian movie in Persian), deleted scenes, and movie trailers. But in the consumer electronics industry, good enough never is.\n\nThe problem with using a DVD connected to an HDTV is that the HDTV can show pictures sharper than the DVD can produce. It's like driving a car with Vaseline on the windshield; your eyes may be sharp, but the lens you're looking through isn't. To solve this problem, Philips, Sony, and others created a high-definition DVD standard called Blu-ray. Now, movies on disc can look as sharp as the images the TV is capable of producing.\n\nThe greater capacity of the Blu-ray disc gave filmmakers extra room to put on even more extraneous material you'll never look at, such as movie-related games, timelines of the action, and actor bios. If you connect the Blu-ray player to the Internet, some discs can access even more programming by downloading it while you're watching.\n\nEver rented an old movie and been forced to watch trailers for films that came out years ago? With a Blu-ray disc played in an Internet-connected Blu-ray player, the trailers you see can be downloaded from the Internet while you're watching them, guaranteeing that you'll be presented only with advertisements for the latest movies you have no desire to see.\n\nLike every other technology, Blu-ray players have come down dramatically in price. You can easily pick one up for around $100 or less; standard DVD players are about $40.\n\n3D TVs: Should I Buy One?\n\nFor a few years, 3D TVs were all the rage\u2014at least as far as the TV manufacturers were concerned. In 2010, every manufacturer was pushing 3D as the Next Big Thing, because they needed a Next Big Thing. With TV prices continually plummeting, the companies needed something to boost profits.\n\nUnfortunately, it didn't work out the way they had hoped. A few 3D TV channels launched, a few big 3D shows were produced, but to date, 3D has never really taken off.\n\nSoon, you won't even have to make a decision about buying a 3D TV because 3D will be just another feature that comes with almost all TVs, just like surround sound. Until that time, watch some 3D excerpts in a retail store. Do you like what you see? If you don't, then you may not want to spend the extra money for 3D capability.\n\nHow Can I Get 3D TV Programming?\n\nMost cable and satellite companies offer one or more 3D channels. You can also buy 3D Blu-ray discs. If your TV connects to the Internet (more on that later), you may be able to watch 3D programming that's automatically downloaded (or streamed) into your TV.\n\nWill My Blu-ray Player Work with 3D Discs, and a Few Other Things You Need to Know About 3D TV\n\nYou'll need a 3D-compatible Blu-ray player. They cost a bit more than regular Blu-ray players.\n\nJust like 3D in the movies, some 3D TV looks good, and some doesn't. Certain kinds of 3D programming make a visual spectacle such as a rock concert, an opera, or the opening ceremony of the Olympics look even more spectacular. And some 3D programming makes a bad program look even worse. 3D may give you a wonderful sense of depth and presence, or it may look like a school kid's diorama, just a series of planes at different points in space.\n\n3D is in its infancy, and some of the people creating it haven't figured out how to do it well.\n\nDo I Have to Wear Glasses When I Watch 3D TV?\n\nYes, but you may not find it such a big deal. After all, you wear glasses when you see a 3D movie in the theater. On the other hand, there is one problem with 3D TV glasses: If you lie down or tilt your head, you'll lose the 3D effect. Also, wearing glasses creates an even more isolating environment when you are watching TV. With glasses on, you'll be less likely to turn to others in the room to have a chat.\n\nOf course, that might be a good thing.\n\nWhat Kind of Glasses Are There?\n\nThere are two different types of 3D glasses. One requires power from a small battery in the frame. The other type has no batteries, just like the ones you use at the movie theater. In fact, you can use ones from a movie theater with some 3D TVs; they are called \"passive\" glasses, and the more expensive battery-operated ones (which are not compatible with the movie theater glasses) are called \"active.\"\n\nThe active glasses cost more\u2014sometimes a lot more. Some manufacturers charge $150 for a pair. The battery-free glasses are so cheap the television companies usually throw in four or more pairs for free.\n\nPros and Cons of 3D TVs with Active and Passive Glasses\n\n3D TVs designed for use with active (battery-powered) glasses:\n\n\u2022 Glasses are expensive (around $60 and as much as $150 a pair).\n\n\u2022 3D picture is sharper than that of battery-free glasses.\n\n\u2022 3D picture is darker than that of a passive-glasses 3D TV.\n\n3D TVs designed for use with passive (battery-free) glasses:\n\n\u2022 Glasses are usually free and included in the box.\n\n\u2022 Picture is not as sharp as with an active-glasses 3D TV.\n\n\u2022 Picture is brighter than with an active-glasses 3D TV.\n\nDoes the 3D TV I Want Use Active (Expensive) or Passive (Cheap) Glasses?\n\nIf your 3D TV comes with four or more pairs of glasses in the box, you're probably buying a passive-glasses 3D TV.\n\nI Don't Like Glasses! Why Can't I Get a 3D TV That Doesn't Require Them?\n\nA 3D TV that doesn't require glasses to view is the Holy Grail, and companies are trying hard to perfect one. The technology to make a glasses-free 3D TV is the same as that used with the plastic scenes that often come in Cracker Jack boxes: Move the little picture left and right and you get a 3D effect.\n\nThe problem is that it's difficult to make that effect work on a large screen so that lots of people sitting in front of a TV can still see 3D. In the demonstrations at trade shows, you literally have to stand over footprints that are placed on the ground to see the 3D effect, and there are only three or four places you can stand to make it work.\n\nGlasses-free 3D TV will become a reality, but it's probably three to five years out. Like all consumer technologies, it's bound to be much more expensive than the standard 3D systems initially, so the companies can make back their development money.\n\n4K TVs: Higher than High Definition\n\nFor years, high-definition TVs (or HDTVs) were presented as the pinnacle of sharpness. But in fact, there is no limit as to how sharp a picture can be.\n\n3D TV seems to have attracted little interest (in Britain, the BBC ended its 3D broadcasts due to lack of viewers), so the consumer electronics industry is looking for something else to boost their sales.\n\nThey hope it will be 4K, or Ultra High Definition TV.\n\nPerhaps you've occasionally arrived late for a movie and been forced to sit in the front rows. The picture usually looks much less sharp than if you were far away. But if the image had a higher resolution it could look good at a close viewing distance, even though you'd still get a stiff neck from the experience.\n\nThat's what Ultra HD does. With four times the resolution of plain old HDTV, you can stand even closer to the screen and still see a sharp image. Alternatively, you can buy a super-sized screen and watch it up close.\n\nShould I Buy a 4K Ultra HD TV?\n\n4K TVs are considerably more expensive than regular HDTVs, although their price has already started to decline.\n\nBut even if you can afford one, the question is whether you'll be able to see the difference in picture sharpness. Based on the typical screen size, most of us won't.\n\nAccording to Raymond Soneira, a theoretical physicist and owner of a company that evaluates video displays, if you sit 10 feet from the screen\u2014typical for consumers\u2014you'd need an 80-inch TV or larger before you could perceive that the image was sharper than that coming from a regular HDTV. How many people have room for an 80-inch TV?\n\nAre There 4K Movies or TV Shows Available?\n\nThe other problem with 4K technology is that there is currently no way to get programs that have been shot in 4K. Blu-ray discs cannot store 4K, although there is talk about a new Blu-ray disc standard that will (in which case you'll need a new Blu-ray player). And cable and satellite companies do not broadcast 4K resolution programs.\n\nIf There's No 4K Programming, What Good Is a 4K TV?\n\nAll 4K displays are able to upscale regular high definition programming. What that means is that the TV tries to increase the resolution by increasing the number of pixels in the image. But it's not the same as watching material that was shot in 4K and then displayed on a 4K TV.\n\nBesides bragging rights, at this time there may be little point for most of us in buying a 4K TV.\n4\n\nDVRs and TiVos: Watch What You Want, When You Want\n\n\"We don't need a TiVo,\" my wife said. \"We hardly ever watch TV.\"\n\nOur TV-watching frequency hasn't changed; it's still about three hours per week. But my wife's attitude toward having a digital video recorder certainly has. Now she says, \"I couldn't imagine watching TV without one.\"\n\nThe difference is that my wife has discovered what millions of others have: that using a TiVo, also known as a digital video recorder, fundamentally changes the nature of the TV viewing experience for the better in ways that a VCR never did.\n\nWhat's the Difference Between a DVR and a TiVo?\n\nNothing\u2014at least nothing substantial. TiVo popularized the concept of a digital video recorder, essentially a hard disk that records TV. But for various reasons, TiVo has lost the lion's share of the market. DVR is simply the generic term for what TiVo popularized.\n\nWhat's the Difference Between a DVR and a VHS Machine?\n\nPlenty. VHS videotape machines are linear devices. That is, they record programs and play them back from start to finish. If you want to skip a section, you have to fast-forward or fast-reverse the tape, running past the parts you're not interested in until you get to where you want to be.\n\nDVRs are digital. Just like all hard disks, they record material randomly. That means you can skip through the boring bits without actually having to see the material you're not interested in. DVRs are constantly running. In fact, they don't even have on\u2013off switches. When you use a DVR, the program you're viewing, even when watching live TV, is actually the program as it was just recorded on the DVR a split second earlier.\n\nBecause a DVR is always on and recording, you can stop live TV, even if you didn't ask the DVR to record the program. DVRs typically record the last thirty minutes of whatever channel they're tuned to. The oldest section gets automatically erased as the newest part gets recorded.\n\nHow Do I Set Up a DVR?\n\nIf you have a modern HDTV it's rather simple. You connect the HDMI cable to the \"HDMI out\" plug on the DVR and connect the other end to the \"HDMI in\" input on the TV. You also connect your cable TV or satellite cable into the back of the DVR. You'll see a port labeled something like \"antenna in,\" \"TV in,\" \"cable in,\" or \"satellite in\"; this brings the signal into the DVR. If you don't have cable or satellite, then connect the cable from your television antenna into the DVR in the same place.\n\nAs I'll explain in more detail later, by using an HDMI cable you can combine audio and video into one cable; previously, one needed multiple cables for video and audio.\n5\n\nRecreating the Sound of a Movie Theater in Your Home\n\nIt's ironic: Sound is invisible, yet good sound can create a great visual experience. Rich, high-fidelity voices and effects emanating from multiple speakers placed around a room bring life to the picture, making the visuals themselves appear fuller.\n\nJust imagine an action sequence with helicopters flying overhead, bullets whizzing by, and characters shouting back and forth across a field. Would the experience be the same if all the sounds came from a tiny, tinny speaker in the front of the TV, compared to five or six speakers in front of, to the sides, and behind you?\n\nCreating a \"theater in your home\" has historically been a major undertaking; for many people, it was more of a hassle than it was worth. You had to buy the speakers and the audio receiver; they were expensive and a pain to set up. Things got even worse with theater surround sound. Now you had speakers to the left, right, and behind you, with a maze of cables to match.\n\nBuying a receiver can be pretty dizzying, and to make you even more anxious about buying the latest and greatest, receivers come with a slew of features, most of which you'll never use. Here are the gobbledy-gook selling points of a typical sub-$300 receiver found on the Amazon Web site (no reason to mention the name because most receivers offer similar technology features):\n\n\u2022 80 Watts per Channel at 8 Ohms, 20 Hz-20 kHz, 0.7%, 2 Channels Driven, FTC; 110 Watts per Channel at 6 Ohms, 1 kHz, 0.9%, 2 Channels Driven, FTC\n\n\u2022 4 HDMI Inputs and 1 Output, HDMI Support for 3D, Audio Return Channel, Deep Color, X.V.Color\n\n\u2022 LipSync, Dolby TrueHD, DTS-HD Master Audio, DVD-Audio\n\n\u2022 Direct Digital Connection of iPod\/iPhone via Front-Panel USB Port\n\n\u2022 Easy to Use On screen Display (OSD)\n\nBefore you run off screaming, let's simplify things.\n\nHow Many Speakers Do I Need?\n\nTo get true surround sound, giving you the sense that sounds are coming from the front, sides, and rear of you, you need speakers in the front, sides, and rear of you. But how many do you need? The typical surround sound setup consists of six speakers:\n\n\u2022 One in the front, usually placed on top of the TV. That's where a character's voice will come from.\n\n\u2022 Two side speakers to the left and right of the center. Those deliver peripheral sounds; for example, the sound of a car traveling from left to right will travel across those speakers.\n\n\u2022 Two rear speakers placed to the left and right, behind you, will perform the same tasks for sounds that are supposed to be, as you may have guessed, behind you.\n\n\u2022 And one fat, boxy speaker called a subwoofer is used to create the low-frequency rumblings essential to action movies: jet engine roars, over-the-top thumping footsteps of romping dinosaurs, or a heavy kick to the jaw in Kung Fu movies.\n\nUnlike the standard speakers, a subwoofer can be placed pretty much anywhere in a room. That's because low-frequency notes are omnidirectional, so it doesn't matter where you put the speaker, as long as you can hear it.\n\nThis six-speaker combination is called, somewhat unexpectedly, 5.1. The \"5\" signifies five speakers, and the \".1\" designates the subwoofer. The subwoofer can reproduce only a subset of the audible spectrum, just the low notes that enrich a scene. So someone decided that if a subwoofer can't play the entire range of audible sounds, it doesn't deserve a whole integer of its own.\n\nWhy Are Subwoofers Used?\n\nA home theater system's speakers are so small they can't reproduce really low notes very well. Therefore, a larger subwoofer is needed to fill the gap.\n\nIf Five Speakers Are Good, Aren't Seven Speakers Even Better? How About Ten, or One Hundred?\n\nHome theater manufacturers are now making 7.1 systems; the extra two speakers are used to fill in the gaps above your head, rather than just to one side or the other. Still, there's a law of diminishing returns. Because of the nature of sound, you don't need a speaker everywhere you want to perceive a sound. Cleverly written algorithms can make you think sounds are coming from the side even if the speaker is in the front.\n6\n\nSurround Sound Technologies\n\n\"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has exceeded our humanity.\"\n\n\u2014Albert Einstein\n\nWhy Do I Want Surround Sound?\n\nIf you watch movies or TV dramas at home, they're likely to be recorded in surround sound. Using an audio system that produces sound that \"surrounds\" you will give you a greater sense of realism. The more authentic the sound, the more you'll be drawn into what you're watching.\n\nI Can't Figure Out What Speakers and Audio Receiver to Buy, So What Do I Do?\n\nThe consumer electronics whizzes figured out that the home theater setup was too complex for most people, regardless of the benefits. So they came up with a new concept: home theater in a box (or HTiB, as the trade magazines call it). The idea is to sell a solution rather than parts: You buy the receiver and DVD or Blu-ray player already bundled with the speakers. And because everything is packaged together, connecting the speakers to the receiver is usually pretty simple; some companies even color-code the connecting cables.\n\nTo help consumers spend more of their money, the electronics manufacturers added many features to HTiB that they say enhance the surround sound experience, such as simulated listening environments that mimic different rooms. The idea is that if you close your eyes, you'll think you are in a thousand-seat concert hall, even though you are really listening in your closet-sized Manhattan living room.\n\nI'm Not Going to Drag Cables Across the Living Room Just to Get Speakers Behind My Sofa\n\nYou're not alone, which is why you can now buy surround sound systems with wireless rear speakers. The front ones use cables to connect to the receiver, and the rear speakers connect using wireless technology.\n\nSetting Up Wireless Speakers in the Rear Is Just Too Much for Me\n\nThere's a solution for you as well. Remember that speakers don't actually have to be in the exact position where the sound is meant to be perceived. Advanced technologies make it possible for sounds to be heard as if they are coming from the rear, even though the speaker is in front of you.\n\nIt seems illogical, but sounds appear to be coming from a particular direction not because they come from there but because various split-second delays in the time it takes sounds to reach our ears give us the distance cues we need to sense where the sounds are emanating from. In theory, you could make a noise sound as if it is coming from the rear using a speaker in the front.\n\nIn fact, you can. Speaker bars\u2014a row of speakers in a box placed under the TV\u2014can simulate sounds as if they're coming from all parts of the room. If you're short on money, space, and hassle tolerance, speaker bars are the way to go.\n\nWhy Can't I Just Use the TV's Built-In Speakers?\n\nYou can, but because TVs are getting thinner and thinner, the space devoted to speakers is getting smaller. That means the quality of the speakers built into a TV is getting pretty bad. You just spent a lot of money on a new HDTV. Do you really want to have tinny, weak sound?\n\nDolby Digital, Dolby HD, DTS, DTS HD, SRS, THX: What Are They, and Which Are Important?\n\nThe audio standard used on DVDs and Blu-ray discs is Dolby Digital. DTS is an optional standard for Blu-rays. They're from two separate companies that compete with each other, but the average Jane or Joe would have a tough time telling them apart. Those two are the only ones you really need to know about.\n\nBuying hint: All home theater receivers come with Dolby Digital; most also include DTS. As long as you have Dolby Digital in the receiver, you're ready to experience surround sound.\n7\n\nProgramming: How to Get It and How to Save Money\n\nThanks to cable and satellite, picture snow and ghosting have become things of the past. Rabbit ears and rooftop antennas are now mostly in the garbage. But cable and satellite TV has become prohibitively expensive. Spending more than $100 per month to receive many channels that you'll never watch does not always seem wise. So how can you cut the cost?\n\nOne way is to get an antenna. The same old rooftop or rabbit ears antenna can be used to receive free HDTV programming from your local networks, and because the signals are now digital, they'll be completely free of ghosts and picture snow.\n\nYou can also cancel your pay TV services and rent the shows you want. Save the $25 per month you were spending for HBO or Showtime and rent a DVD version of Curb Your Enthusiasm or Weeds on DVD from companies such as Netflix, Blockbuster, or the Redbox kiosks in grocery stores. Redbox rentals are only about $1 per night. Netflix subscriptions cost as little as $8 per month for unlimited DVD rentals, with one disc at your house at any one time. Hint: Get Netflix for a month, catch up on all your shows, and then cancel the service for a few months until you need to catch up again.\n\nOr use the Internet and watch TV programming on your computer. You can even transfer it to your TV or get programming through a \"connected TV\" (more on this later).\n8\n\nWires, Wires, and More Wires! Does This Plug into That?\n\n\"Make a product easy and simple and people will buy it. Make it complex and cumbersome and you will fail.\"\n\n\u2014Eisuke Tsuyuzaki, former Chief Technology Officer, Panasonic North America\n\nThey are cables, not wires. But whatever you call them, figuring out how to connect all your gear can be daunting. Look at the back of your new TV; what do you see? If you have a brand-new HDTV what you'll see is holes\u2014lots of them! Inputs, outputs, digital connectors, analog connectors; the back of a TV looks like the telephone switchboard in a Lily Tomlin sketch. You'll find a similar dizzying array in the back of a Blu-ray player, a cable or satellite box, or an audio receiver as well.\n\nWhy Are There So Many Connectors in the Back of a TV?\n\nConnectors are constantly changing. When home computers first became popular in the 1980s, the plugs you needed to connect the PC to the printer were enormous because initially, computers were being used only by businesses. Eventually the plugs shrank, making them much more friendly to consumers. But even more than the esthetics, the new plugs allowed the devices they were connecting to do more things or do the same things faster, with better quality.\n\nA Plug Cheat Sheet\n\n~ Video ~\n\n\u2022  RCA (composite) cables: two for audio (one red, one white) and one for video (yellow). Provides the worst possible picture quality between the TV and the video source (the DVD or cable\/satellite box). RCA first popularized them, hence the name. Can be used only for standard definition video (not for HDTV).\n\n\u2022  Component cables: better picture quality. They use three plugs for the picture, but they still need the red and white RCA cables to transmit the sound. Can be used with HDTVs.\n\n\u2022  HDMI: best picture quality, plus the added benefit of being able to combine the audio and video cables into one single cable with a small plug. Only an HDMI cable can carry the highest-quality Blu-ray resolution. The Blu-ray industry made the use of HDMI a requirement for best quality; for various reasons it helps prevent unscrupulous people from making illegal copies of the disc.\n\n~ Audio ~\n\n\u2022  RCA cables: use the red and white cables for analog sound.\n\n\u2022  Digital cable: one plug that lets you access a digital audio feed that may be available from DVD and Blu-ray players, and cable and satellite boxes.\n\nA Simple Guide to Connecting Everything Audiovisual\n\nExcept for Apple (throughout this book you can safely insert \"except for Apple\" for lots of things), most consumer electronics manufacturers seem incapable of writing coherent instruction manuals. They show page after page of features with little or no explanation about what those features do. The badly drawn diagrams are too small to see or too complex to understand. And the English text was written by someone for whom English seems to be a third language. For example, try to figure out what this paragraph means (taken from an actual Sony HDTV manual):\n\nVideo Color Space (x.v. color)\u2014Displays moving pictures that is (sic) more faithful to the original source by matching the color space of source.\n\nSetting is fixed to Normal when the input signal is HDMI (RGB), even if x.v. COLOR is selected.\n\nIn the simplest possible terms, here's all you really need to know to make the connections you need:\n\n\u2022 \"Input\" is the place on the TV to plug in the cable carrying the signal from the Blu-ray player, the DVD, or other device.\n\n\u2022 \"Output\" is the place on the Blu-ray player or the DVD to plug in the cable that's carrying the signal to your TV.\n\n\u2022 HDMI: Use this cable for best results. You don't have to look for the words \"input\" and \"output.\" Just connect either end of an HDMI cable from one device to another.\n\n\u2022 All the other cables: Don't use them.\n9\n\nRemote Controls: Why Can't We All Just Get Along?\n\nHow many remotes do you have on your coffee table? If you've got a TV, home theater receiver, Blu-ray or DVD player, and a cable or satellite box, that's at least four. You need one to turn on the TV, another to fire up the cable, and a third to listen to the sound. If you've read the instructions, you've probably figured out how to turn on the TV with the cable or satellite box remote. But anything beyond that, such as using the same remote to run the DVD player, is either impossible or an enormous hassle.\n\nEveryone knows this. And various companies keep on trying to come up with \"universal\" remotes, one remote that will work everything.\n\nWhy Can't One Remote Be Designed to Control Everything?\n\nIt's constantly tried, but the problem is that none of them work very well because there's too little space on a remote to fit all the commands that operate the various boxes. So some developers have tried to use touch screens to add lots of commands, but a command you need often may be buried three screens deep on a universal remote. I've tried at least ten universal remotes; some of them even just turn an iPad or iPhone into a remote, and none of them work satisfactorily.\n\nWill we ever have a useful universal remote? Yes, but it will probably use a combination of voice and gesture commands to obviate the need for screens and multiple buttons altogether.\n\nTip: Stick to your bowlful of remotes until Apple or some other clever company comes out with a real solution.\n\nI Got Everything Set Up, But Now My Remote Doesn't Work!\n\nIf you have cable or satellite, you probably have a remote from your programming provider that's supposed to turn on your TV, your cable or satellite box, and perhaps your audio receiver. But it doesn't. Here are a few tips to help troubleshoot the problem:\n\n\u2022 Did you check the batteries? It sounds stupid, but dead batteries are often the problem.\n\n\u2022 Is the slider in the right position? The carriers' remotes often have a slider that, if it's in the correct position, is designed to turn multiple devices on and off. If it's in the wrong position, such as the \"TV\" position, then it'll only turn on the TV.\n\n\u2022 Did you program the remote to work with your TV as well as your cable or satellite box? You can't expect the remote to turn on other boxes if you haven't taught it what type of TV or audio receiver or DVD player you have. Programming the remote is almost always simple; you scroll through an on-screen list of manufacturers. When you find yours, you'll see a list of codes. You enter the first one into your remote (as per the cable or satellite company's directions) and try the remote. If it turns off your TV (or whatever device you're trying to get to work) you're done. If it doesn't work, you go on to the next code. Eventually, one of them will work. It always seems like it's the last one in the list.\n\n\u2022 Are you using the wrong remote? For example, if you have a TV, a Blu-ray player, and an audio receiver all from the same company, each will come with its own remote. Often, each remote has two similar-looking power buttons: one for the device that it was shipped with and another to turn on all devices from the same manufacturer. If you push the device-specific power button, nothing will happen with the other things you're trying to turn on.\n\nSave a Lot of Money on Cables\n\nYou've spent several thousand dollars on a new flat-panel TV and a surround sound system; shouldn't you spend just a few hundred dollars to buy those really good, professional cables from companies such as Monster Cable? After all, an HDTV is only as good as its weakest link, right?\n\nAbsolutely not.\n\nOn Amazon, you can buy an 8-foot HDMI cable from Monster Cable for $45, or you can get a 10-foot no-name HDMI cable for $2.67. Think of the profit margins!\n\nRemember: Digital is either on or off; you either get a great picture and sound, or you get nothing. When it comes to cables, save your money and send it to Uncle Soupy.\n\n10\n\nGetting More from Your TV\n\nWatching TV on Your Computer, and Vice Versa\n\nLook at your computer screen. If it's a flat-panel model, it probably looks similar to your flat-panel TV, except that it has a keyboard. Not only does a TV look like a PC, but what you can do with each, once very different, is beginning to meld.\n\nYou can watch TV on your PC.\n\nYou can access the Internet on your TV.\n\nMany cable channels offer various programs via the   \nInternet. For example, you can watch BBC news clips on the BBCnews.com Web site. If you're a Daily Show fan, go to thedailyshow.com to see clips of previous shows.\n\nWatch uncut movies, TV shows, and original shows on Sony's Crackle.com. It features some programming you may have forgotten (such as 1994's The Professional) and others you haven't (including Seinfeld).\n\nHulu (hulu.com) features TV shows from ABC, Comedy Central, Fox, NBC, and PBS. Hulu Plus, a pay version, allows subscribers to watch programming not just on a computer but also on portable devices such as smartphones, tablets, and Internet-connected TVs. Hulu Plus videos are offered in high definition; regular Hulu shows programs in standard definition. Hulu Plus subscribers can see many more episodes of a series; standard no-charge Hulu typically offers only the five most recent episodes.\n\nMissed Good Morning America, CBS This Morning, or the Today show? Each makes clips available on their respective Web sites.\n\nIf you subscribe to HBO through most cable or satellite services, you can watch previously aired HBO programming using their HBO Go service on your PC, tablet, and some Internet-connected TVs.\n\nYouTube became the first popular video-sharing Web site. Anyone can download anything to appear on the site within YouTube's content rules\u2014that means no nudity\u2014and apparently most of the world has. But YouTube is much more than cats playing pianos. It has become the world's repository for essential, historic, and ground-breaking moving images.\n\nHint: Think of YouTube as   \nYour College's Library Stacks\n\nAs a student, I loved to wander down my university library's stacks, picking up a volume here or there, allowing my interests to wander among a wide   \nvariety of subjects I never before considered. YouTube gives you the ability to do the same in   \nthe visual realm.\n\nInterested in 1980s TV commercials for the Renault Le Car, or the elusive Ipana toothpaste commercial starring Bucky Beaver? Looking for the last public presentation given by Steve Jobs, or a video showing how Margaret Thatcher learned to change her manner of speaking? What once would have taken weeks of research is now available instantly on YouTube.\n\nIs There Any Way to Watch Programming That Doesn't Originate from Where I Live?\n\nTelevision programs from around the world are now available to be streamed on the Internet. However, that doesn't mean you'll be able to watch them.\n\nThe transmission rights to certain programs are often restricted based on the country in which you live. So you may be able to watch the local BBC TV news show on the Internet if you live in the United Kingdom, but you can't do so in the United States. That's because BBC news is distributed in the States by BBC America and PBS, and neither channel wants to see its viewers siphoned off from their own networks.\n\nEvery computer connected to the Internet has its unique IP, or Internet Protocol address. The Web servers that store programming check your IP address, and if it's emanating from a country where the Internet broadcaster doesn't have permission to stream the show, you won't be able to see it.\n\nThere are workarounds, ways to spoof the location of your IP address so a computer server thinks it's coming from an authorized country. But given that it skirts legality, I'll leave it up to you (or your child) to figure out how to do it.\n\nSo What's the Downside?\n\nDo you want to watch TV on your PC? It depends on the size of your screen. If you have a computer monitor the size of your living room TV, there's no problem. But if your computer is much smaller and the movie you're watching occupies only half the screen, then you may not like it much. (Unless you're fifteen years old and size matters little as long as you can watch anything at any time.)\n\nThe solution is to transfer the Internet image that's on your PC to your TV screen. If you have a newer computer you can probably use a DVI-HDMI cable. Older computers use another variation, such as an S-video cable.\n\nIf that sounds like too much of a hassle, and you're happy watching video downloaded from the Internet on your PC, the next section is not for you. But if you want to watch TV programming on a TV even if it comes from the Internet, there are new, simpler ways to do it.\n11\n\nInternet-Connected TVs\n\n\"We lack common areas, a time when everyone watched the same three TV channels. Today, things are fragmented, and that gives the individual too much control. You no longer have the serendipity of finding things [the way you can] when reading articles in a print newspaper.\"\n\n\u2014Steve Mayer\n\nToday, most TVs can connect to the Internet. They do this for multiple reasons:\n\n\u2022 To access the Internet (obviously).\n\n\u2022 To download the latest software that keeps your digital TV up to date.\n\n\u2022 To turn your TV into a giant Skype viewer (Skype lets you make free voice and video calls to other Skype users anywhere in the world).\n\n\u2022 To use Internet apps, software that lets you watch Internet-based programming.\n\nTelevision manufacturers are offering their own assortment of connected TV apps. Some, such as Amazon Video-on-Demand, Netflix, and Major League Baseball, are found on most TVs, but others may be exclusive to one brand (e.g., Panasonic's app that lets you transfer your weight readings from a special bathroom scale to the TV screen). Some Internet-connected TVs allow users to access the Web only through their apps; others allow viewers to actually go to any Web site using a browser, just like on a computer. There are Internet-connected TVs that use a standard TV remote, and others that use a remote that has a miniature computer keyboard.\n\nBuy an Internet-connected TV, but if you're not ready for that, buy an Internet-connected Blu-ray player for $100 or less. Many of the same apps\u2014such as Netflix\u2014can be accessed through the player. There are also other alternatives:\n\n\u2022 Apple TV: This $99 box that's not really a TV lets viewers watch TV shows and movies purchased from iTunes on their TVs. You can also use it to stream movies from your computer (or movies you access from Web sites on your computer) onto your TV screen. You can even watch Britain's Sky News all-news channel. It also plays radio stations accessed through the Internet.\n\n\u2022 Boxee: For about $170, the Boxee box (boxee.tv) lets you access any movies or TV shows you can find on the Internet, plus movies and TV shows from Netflix (subscription required), Vudu (see below), Major League Baseball, stuff stored on your own computer, music from the Pandora service, and photos stored on Flickr and Facebook. No monthly fee.\n\n\u2022 Vudu: The pay-per-view service provides access to movies on different devices such as HDTVs, Blu-ray players, or video game consoles such as the Xbox or PlayStation, or on your computer. The price for each movie depends on the resolution you want for viewing the film. For example, as of this writing, a standard-definition film typically costs $4 to rent for two days; watching it in the highest resolution of high definition (only on a TV) costs $6. You can also buy movies; for example, the 3D version of Toy Story 3 costs $22. Whether you buy or rent from Vudu, the movies are downloaded or streamed onto your TV, computer, or Blu-ray player. No physical discs are sent to you.\n\nAre We Drowning in Distractions?\n\nAre Web sites such as Facebook, Pinterest, and Twitter bad for us? Are we spending too much time in virtual worlds and forgetting how to communicate? We might like our children to communicate face to face, but as Rabbi Mordecai Finley, head of a prominent Los Angeles congregation, says, \"Six kids in a room won't happen. They're so overscheduled. I don't notice any impediment in sociability. Are you a worse person if you text? I don't see it. All I ask is that [they] be present. I tell my kids, 'If you want to text, tell us, and then don't be present.'\"\n\n12\n\nCreating a Home Network\n\n\"Today, everything wants to be connected. What's truly amazing is that it works at all.\"\n\n\u2014Steve Mayer\n\nThe computer industry wants us to think that most Americans are streaming Netflix movies, Twitter feeds, photos, and music to every TV in the house while simultaneously surfing the Web.\n\nThat's nonsense.\n\nWhen the instructions for one popular router\u2014the product that's needed to distribute an Internet connection throughout the house\u2014asks the average consumer to choose between the WPA-PSK (TKIP) and the WPA-PSK (TKIP) + WPA2-PSK (AES) methods of security, you know something's wrong.\n\nDo you even need a home network? You do if you want to access the Internet wirelessly throughout your house using your PC, smartphone, iPad, Blu-ray player, or even\u2014now get this\u2014your refrigerator or oven (it's happening today). Why would you want to connect your refrigerator or oven to the Internet? Because soon a repair person will be able to figure out what's wrong with your appliances by going to a Web site and diagnosing the problem. Imagine the day when you can turn on your oven while you're still on your way home by going to a Web site on your smartphone\u2014that day is right around the corner.\n\nConnecting your TV and your Blu-ray player to the Internet makes sense because a lot of new programming such as Netflix movies can be streamed to your TV. And Blu-ray discs have additional, hidden information that can be accessed only if the player is connected to the Web.\n\nThe simplest way to get it all connected is to create a wireless network in your home. Unfortunately, figuring out which home networking gear you need to do all these fun and nefarious things is like buying toothpaste: There are too many choices, wild performance claims, and no idea what you need for best results.\n\nYou'll need a wireless router to get an Internet signal from your modem to a PC at the other end of the house. Routers also act as firewalls, helping to keep out malicious hackers, so you should have one, even if you have only one computer online.\n\nBuy a router.\n\nWhat Kind of Router Should I Buy?\n\nRouters typically use either 802.11g, 802.11n, or 802.11ac technology. The AC technology signals travel further and faster.\n\nGet an 802.11ac router.\n\nHow Much Should I Spend?\n\nAs little as possible.\n\nWith wireless N routers available for as little as $20 and 802.11ac routers at around $100, you can always buy another if it breaks. All routers use the same hardware; where they differ is in their software. So spend as little as possible once you know the features you want.\n\nWhat Router Speed Do I Need?\n\nN wireless routers transmit signals up to 300 megabits per second, way faster than a typical Internet signal, which typically is 5\u20137 megabits per second. AC routers can theoretically transmit at twice the speed of N routers.\n\nSounds like there's a disconnect here. The high router transmission speed is only the speed at which the transmission starts. Once that signal has traveled through your house, it may have lost as much as 70 percent of its speed. So the higher the starting speed of a router, the more it'll have left by the time it gets to its destination.\n\nHigher-speed routers also allow you to transfer files faster within a house, for example, if you wanted to send a movie from your PC to your TV. They also allow you to back up files faster.\n\nSo any N or AC router will probably be fast enough.\n\nDual vs. Single Band\n\nN and AC routers carry the signal on either the 2.4-megahertz band or on both the 2.4-megahertz and 5-megahertz bands. Microwave ovens and cordless phones also use the 2.4-megahertz band, so a router placed too close to those devices could lose its signal; if that happens, you'll have to restart your modem and router. The 5-megahertz band is resistant to microwaves and other appliances. But the 5-megahertz signal does not travel as far.\n\nSo here's what to do: If your router is in the kitchen near vacuum cleaners or cordless phones, get a dual-band router.\n\nWired vs. Wireless: Nobody's Perfect\n\nWireless is certainly convenient\u2014you get an Internet signal everywhere\u2014but there are still problems. For example, you may occasionally lose your signal, and wireless connections are typically 30 percent slower. So use a wired connection whenever possible.\n\nIf using wires is impractical (e.g., over a long distance) another solution is to use Powerline networking (also known as HomePlug). Powerline is a technology that sends Internet signals piggybacked onto your home's electrical wiring. To make Powerline work, you buy two Powerline transmitters (available from Belkin, Netgear, and other manufacturers), little boxes that simply plug into wall outlets. In each box is a plug to insert an Ethernet cable. You plug one box into an outlet near your router and connect an Ethernet cable from the router into the Powerline module. Simple. The other Powerline box is plugged into the wall where you want the Internet signal. Just like the first, you connect an Ethernet cable to this box and connect the other end of the cable to the device that needs an Internet connection.\n\nUnfortunately, Powerline technology comes with its own set of problems. For one, be prepared to lose your signal. In Powerline tests using different products, I have lost the Internet connection every few weeks; often, restarting the PC, the router, and the Powerline modules does nothing. For some unknown reason, only an overnight hiatus brings the signal back.\n\nWhen possible, create a wired, not a wireless network. Or bridge the wireless gap with Powerline technology, but still keep a wireless connection as backup for when your Powerline system goes down.\n\nHow Do I Get the Internet into My TV, My Blu-ray Player, and My Xbox 360, All at Once?\n\nSome TVs and Blu-ray players accept wireless signals, and Microsoft sells a wireless adapter for its Xbox 360. In those cases, it's easy to get the Internet into several places because if you're receiving a signal wirelessly, it can go to multiple devices at the same time.\n\nIf your products can't receive a wireless signal, you'll need to connect each using an Ethernet cable. To do that, bring the signal close to your entertainment products using a Powerline module, and then connect a small box called an Ethernet switch to the Powerline module. This little box is like an electrical extension cord plug expander. You plug one Ethernet cable from the Powerline module into it, and the other side has multiple holes where you can plug in up to about five Ethernet cables to connect the box to the video game machine, the Blu-ray player, and so on.\n\nEthernet switches are cheap. You can pick one up for $25.\n\nIf you want additional information or you still can't figure it out, there are multiple sources where you can learn more.\n\nAmazon (amzn.to\/hA7HPf), Best Buy (bit.ly\/eOEa6G), and CNET (cnet.co\/g4E4r0) offer comprehensive home networking primers. If you prefer to talk to a live person, visit a big-box store such as Costco or Best Buy. These days, they actually know what they're talking about.\n\nWireless Network Cheat Sheet\n\nBuy an N or AC router.\n\nBuy the cheapest N or AC router that has the features you want and that you can afford.\n\nGet a single-band model. Exception: If you're putting your router near a microwave oven or cordless phone, buy a dual-band router.\n\nA wired Powerline AV connection is faster and more reliable than a wireless one. Use it, but keep wireless as a backup.\n\n13\n\nShould I Get Rid of My Landline Phone?\n\n\"People have set points of sociability and interaction that they need. Change the field, and they'll find other ways of interacting.\"\n\n\u2014Steve Mayer\n\nWith cell phones ubiquitous and smartphones nearly so, is there any reason to have a landline phone any more? Young people are increasingly relying on their mobile phones as their sole source of contact. After all, why bother paying for a landline phone, tied as it is to a physical place, when you've got a cell phone that can find you just about anywhere in the world? I can think of a few reasons to keep a landline phone:\n\n\u2022 Cell phone voice quality\u2014especially in the United States\u2014stinks.\n\n\u2022 Cell phone reception is spotty. You may get decent coverage in front of your home or down the street, but inside your home can be a completely different story.\n\n\u2022 A landline phone's voice quality is far superior to a cell phone's. With a landline you can hear the people you're speaking to very well. In fact, AT&T used to advertise the fact that it had improved the fidelity of its landline system, offering customers an 800 number that would demonstrate the differences between its old and new technologies.\n\n\u2022 A landline phone is tied to a physical locale. If you dial your kid, you know where she or he is. Speak to someone on a cell phone, and they might be in Timbuktu (literally).\n\n\u2022 A landline phone acts as a social adhesive. A call can be for anyone in the family, and everyone can jump on the phone to chat with friends or relatives. A cell phone is solitary; the call that comes in is meant for that person alone, and there's no easy way to share the conversation.\n\nThe good news is that landlines are cheap. As fewer people keep them, the phone companies offer great deals to retain subscribers. Twenty years ago, a coast-to-coast call cost 25\u00a2 per minute during the day. Today you can pay as little as $30 per month for unlimited calling anywhere in the United States, plus caller ID, three-way calling, and many other features that you'll never use or even remember.\n\nMoney-Saving Tip\n\nPhone, satellite TV, and cable companies operate under the philosophy of \"if they don't ask, we won't give.\" When your introductory offer with one of them is about to expire, ask the company for a new deal. Tell the operator you want to speak to their \"retention specialist\"; threaten to quit unless they extend or lower your current price.\n\nFor example, AT&T's Internet access price is adver-tised as the rate for the first year only. When it was about to expire, I called and received an even better rate than I started with. If I hadn't asked, my rate would have doubled.\n\nThe satellite company DirecTV will typically give you many free months of HBO or Showtime and knock about $100 off your annual rate just to get you to commit to two more years. And why not do it? Assuming you're still alive, you'll want TV in two years. Why does this work? Because the phone and entertainment companies are in a constant battle to keep every subscriber they can. If they refuse, you've lost nothing, and you can switch to another provider anyway.\n\nThe chances of that happening are slim.\n\nWhat Alternatives Are There to Landline Phones?\n\nIf you don't like AT&T, Verizon, or whoever serves your area, you can also subscribe to voice over IP (VoIP) service. VoIP uses the Internet, rather than the standard phone lines, to connect your calls; two of the many companies that offer VoIP service are Ooma and Vonage.\n\nVoIP service can be much cheaper than standard phone service. For example, Vonage currently charges $26 per month for unlimited calling in the United States and Canada and to the landlines in fifty-eight other countries.\n\nOoma charges no monthly fee when you buy their gateway box, a device that goes between your Internet connection and your phone. Once you have it, you can make unlimited calls in the United States and Canada. Calls to other countries can be as little as 1\u00a2 per minute if you buy a monthly bundle of minutes, or more if you just pay on a per-call basis.\n\nIf you want a lot of other features, such as an automatic second line and the ability to block telemarketing calls from certain numbers, then you have to pay a monthly fee.\n\nStill, VoIP may not be for you.\n\nVoIP's sound quality is often inferior to standard landline service, and if you have a home security system, it may not work with a VoIP service. In fact, Vonage recommends that subscribers with alarm systems keep basic standard landline phone service. If you have to do that, the savings may be gone.\n\nThink about where you call. Although the idea of free calling to many countries sounds cool, if you rarely call them, what's the big deal? And with any VoIP service, you'll still need to pay for an Internet connection. Often, the big companies such as AT&T that provide Internet service charge more if you don't also get phone service from them. So add up all the costs, think about your needs, and see whether VoIP phone service still makes sense.\n\nHow Can I Call Overseas Without Spending a Fortune?\n\nAT&T may offer unlimited rates when you call within the United States, but if you call another country without having signed up for an overseas calling plan, be prepared to faint when you get your bill. Even a call to Canada\u2014if you haven't signed up for Canada calling\u2014can easily run you $10 or $20 for a few minutes. Crazy. AT&T actually charges you a monthly fee for the privilege of getting an international calling plan, even if you never call a single country outside the United States.\n\nDon't waste your money. Instead, use one of the simple dial-around plans that really do cost a lot less. Years ago, these dial-around plans were unwieldy. You had to first dial an 800 number or a five-digit code to get to the other company's service. Today, you can set up your home phone to dial the dial-around service with just two buttons; then the service can recognize your number. If you have several overseas numbers you regularly call, you can set up speed dial numbers to call them quickly.\n\nOne of the easiest and cheapest overseas call services is Pingo (pingo.com). You make the Pingo access number one of your speed dial numbers. As soon as you hear the Pingo prompt, you enter the overseas number and you're done. Rates are excellent: 1.5\u00a2 per minute to call France and the United Kingdom, 1.75\u00a2 to Canada, 2.25\u00a2 per minute to call Australia and Italy, and 3.3\u00a2 to call New Zealand. Mobile rates are higher, except to Canada.\n\nWhy Does It Cost So Much to Call Some Other Countries?\n\nPhone rates are set by the countries that receive the calls; with communications so cheap, rates have nothing to do with distance. In most countries outside North America, there's no charge for incoming cell phone calls, so someone has to pick up the tab, and that tab can be costly. Calling a cell phone in the United Kingdom using Pingo costs 15\u00a2 per minute\u2014ten times its landline calling rate!\n\nCountries that are short of hard currency also charge more to call from overseas. Even though it's only 90 miles away from the United States, a call to a landline in Cuba using Pingo and other similar services costs about 95\u00a2 per minute.\n\nHave any pals in North Korea? You'll be charged 55\u00a2 per minute to speak to them. Once they defect to South Korea it'll cost you less than one twentieth the rate\u20142.5\u00a2 per minute\u2014to have a chat.\n\nOne Phone Company to Forget\n\nYou may have heard many commercials for PennyTalk, another dial-around service that advertises its low, low, low rate of just 1\u00a2 per minute to call Canada and the United Kingdom. What they don't say so loudly is that every call\u2014no matter how long\u2014incurs a 49\u00a2 \"connection fee.\" So that 1\u00a2 one-minute call to England actually costs you 50\u00a2, one of the highest rates around. If you speak for fifteen minutes to the United Kingdom, PennyTalk will charge you 64\u00a2, compared with Pingo's 22.5\u00a2. Even an hour's call is more expensive: $1.09 for PennyTalk vs. 90\u00a2 on Pingo.\n\nThe best advice: Stay away from PennyTalk. A better name for it would be Lots of Pennies to Talk.\n\n14\n\nEverything Is Connected\n\nJust because you can do something technologically, should you? The same question that confronted developers of the atomic and hydrogen bombs has become a consideration for today's consumer electronics pioneers, although with fewer dire implications.\n\nYou may be able to combine a food processor with a word processor, but would it make any sense? Simply because you can synchronize a Web site with a device that ejects appropriate smells when you visit that site, should you? In the late 1990s, the people behind DigiScents, a startup with $20 million in funding and seventy employees, apparently thought it was a no-brainer. Some of us thought the people who came up with this idea had no brains, and in The New York Times, I referred to it as one of the dopiest tech inventions ever. In 2001, it shut down.\n\nJust because you can connect the Internet to everything, should you? Why not connect the fridge and the oven? While we're at it, how about the scale? A clock radio? And of course, the washer\u2013dryer.\n\nWhat Can I Do with Connected Devices?\n\nIt all sounds pretty silly, but if you think about it, it makes sense. When an appliance is connected to the Internet you can\n\n\u2022 Find out if your parent with heart failure just gained 3 pounds overnight or suddenly went into diabetic shock. You don't need to worry anymore that your mother isn't bothering to tell you because she doesn't want to worry you. Instead, you can arrange for medical information to be sent automatically over the Internet to a doctor or caretaker.\n\n\u2022 Remotely diagnose what's wrong with your fridge or washer\u2013dryer instead of asking for a repair tech to be sent out.\n\n\u2022 Automatically order parts.\n\n\u2022 Monitor food consumption and automatically compile a shopping list.\n\n\u2022 Remotely control the oven, turning it on and off before you get home.\n\n\u2022 Post your weight on a Web site for remote access anywhere in the world.\n\n\u2022 Suggest recipes based on what's in your fridge.\n\n\u2022 Turn on the lights or change the lights' colors while away from home, by using a smartphone app.\n\nAll these features are available today. Companies such as Bosch with its Health Buddy System, Honeywell's HomMed products, and Ideal Life are equipping thousands of patients with automatic health monitoring devices. Because doctors, nurses, and adult caregivers don't need to constantly check up on them, older adults can remain in their homes longer. Face it; given the option, that's where we would all like to spend our last days.\n\nLG and Samsung make Internet-connected fridges, and Samsung has one with a built-in tablet and apps. You can listen to music from Pandora while you're putting away the eggs. Or if you don't have eggs, search for a quick egg-free recipe using the Epicurious app. If you can't find anything, and you simply must buy eggs, check the weather app before you run out to the store.\n\nIn the near future you'll be able to scan grocery receipts so the fridge automatically knows when products will expire, although that may seem like more effort than it's worth. And some appliances will talk to each other, so you'll be able to turn on your connected washing machine from your connected fridge.\n\nIs There Any Reason I Wouldn't Want Everything Connected?\n\nThere is a downside. You'll be able to do all those things, but so will your mischievous children, a jilted lover, or a disgruntled ex\u2013business partner. Imagine turning on your oven when you're on the 5:18 to Stamford. Then imagine someone who really dislikes you doing the same thing at noon, and turning the temperature up to 500 degrees. Of course, there'll be privacy controls to prevent malicious behavior, but one burned-down house could screw up the whole enterprise.\n15\n\nYou (Used to) Light Up My Life: The New Light Bulbs That Will Change the World\u2014and Yours\n\nWith all the rapid technological changes that have become a part of our lives, there's one technology that has been glacially slow to change: the light bulb. The standard incandescent light bulb is essentially the same as the one Thomas Edison invented more than a hundred years ago. The concept is identical and the execution not much different: Electricity is fed to a wire (filament) that glows. The interior of the lamp in which the filament is placed is a vacuum, so the filament lasts longer. The lamp screws into a socket called, appropriately enough, an Edison mount. If you live in Europe, the bulb is pushed in and given a tiny twist, just like putting a bayonet on a rifle (and guess what that mount is called?).\n\nThe great thing about this technology is that it's incredibly cheap: Bulbs cost about a buck. The bad thing is that despite the invention of the transistor and computer chips, they haven't changed much since 1910. Traditional light bulbs are also unbelievably inefficient. More than 90 percent of the energy used is not turned into light; it's turned into heat (that's why when you touch a bulb that's on, you get burned).\n\nAre Standard Light Bulbs Being Banned?\n\n\"And the government would have banned Thomas Edison's light bulb. Oh yeah, Obama's regulators actually did just that.\"\n\n\u2014Mitt Romney, March 19, 2012\n\n\"That's why I introduced the Light Bulb Freedom of Choice Act. I am so proud of that bill. . . . President Bachmann will allow you to buy any light bulb you want, in the United States of America.\"\n\n\u2014Michele Bachmann, as seen on YouTube\n\nVarious people with little knowledge have made false statements about the future of light bulbs and, as Michele Bachmann said, promised to \"allow you to buy any light bulb you want.\" But the purchase of regular light bulbs was never going to become illegal. What will eventually be prohibited is the manufacture of regular light bulbs that are highly inefficient. You can always buy whatever's on a store's shelf.\n\nAccording to government guidelines, each year most incandescent light bulbs that are sold in the United States will have to use only a certain amount of power to create the same amount of light that formerly would have required more electricity. First, it's the 100-watt bulbs that are affected. Eventually, those standards will reach down to 40-watt bulbs. This is no different from setting gas mileage efficiency standards for vehicles or creating Energy Star standards for televisions, water heaters, and refrigerators.\n\nIt's not a \"government takeover\" of light bulbs. It's a policy designed to reduce energy use.\n\nBulbs Exempt from the Efficiency Standards\n\nHere's a list of the regular light bulbs that the government has exempted from its efficiency standards. You'll probably be able to buy these forever, no matter how much they hog energy. Fear not\u2014you can always buy plain old fridge lamps!\n\n\u2022 Appliance lamp\n\n\u2022 Black light lamp\n\n\u2022 Bug lamp\n\n\u2022 Colored lamp\n\n\u2022 Infrared lamp\n\n\u2022 Left-hand thread lamp\n\n\u2022 Marine lamp\n\n\u2022 Marine's signal service lamp\n\n\u2022 Mine service lamp\n\n\u2022 Plant light lamp\n\n\u2022 Reflector lamp\n\n\u2022 Rough service lamp\n\n\u2022 Shatter-resistant lamp (shatterproof and shatter-protected)\n\n\u2022 Sign service lamp\n\n\u2022 Silver bowl lamp\n\n\u2022 Showcase lamp\n\n\u2022 Three-way incandescent lamp\n\n\u2022 Traffic signal lamp\n\n\u2022 Vibration service lamp\n\nSo I'll Have to Use Those Ugly Compact Fluorescent Bulbs?\n\nCompact fluorescent light bulbs have improved significantly. They use much less electricity, and they last quite a bit longer than regular bulbs. But when it comes to the quality of the light they create, they're still pretty dreadful. Stand under a fluorescent light, and your face takes on an ugly greenish tint. That's because fluorescent light doesn't have all the colors of the spectrum, so the light it creates doesn't look like the light we're used to seeing from regular light bulbs. And the light isn't directed; it shines in all directions, so there are no interesting shadows such as those you get from a regular light bulb. Can you imagine putting a fluorescent light in your living room or bedroom? That's essentially what you're doing when you use a compact fluorescent bulb, the kind that screws into a table lamp.\n\nEven when a compact fluorescent lamp claims to emit warm light, it's not the same; it still looks somewhat off. There are environmental problems too; compact fluorescents contain mercury, so when you throw them away you're polluting the earth. If you live in a cold climate, don't try to use them outdoors\u2014they often won't light. And many compact fluorescents can't be dimmed like regular bulbs.\n\nWhat a dilemma! Use a regular bulb and waste a lot of energy, or use a compact fluorescent and get bad-looking light, polluting mercury, and lamps that won't dim. Fortunately there's a third alternative (you probably knew that was coming).\n\nAre There Any New Lighting Technologies on the Horizon?\n\nThe newest technology creates light from a light-emitting diode chip: Essentially, a tiny little dot the size of a pencil point can be made to emit a ton of light. These new LED lamps use about one tenth the number of watts that a standard bulb uses to create the same amount of light. Unlike compact fluorescents, the light actually looks just about the same as that coming from a regular bulb. They can be dimmed, and they don't contain mercury.\n\nBecause the light comes from a silicon chip like those found in computers, these bulbs can do parlor tricks. You can turn them on and off from a cell phone. You can get an automatic text message if they malfunction. Combine LED chips of different colors, and you can change the color of the light at will.\n\nDean Kamen, the entrepreneur who invented the Segway, has converted all the lights to LEDs in his house and its surroundings on the island where he lives. You can see pictures of his house at nyti.ms\/S2jiRz. LED lamps are being used to dramatically light museums and major buildings such as the Empire State Building. You can see some examples at nyti.ms\/Wwxt3d.\n\nCities such as San Francisco are installing LED streetlights. If one burns out they'll know immediately and automatically, without waiting for a call from an angry resident after the street has been dark for a month. If there's no crime, half the lamps can be turned off to save energy, and if there's a riot, the lights can be strobed to disorient and disperse the troublemakers.\n\nAnd here's the cool part: All that can be accomplished from a smartphone app! Because the lights use computer chips, they can be connected to the Internet and then controlled from any other device that's also connected, such as a computer, iPad, or smartphone.\n\nAmazingly, LED lamps can last as long as twenty years. That's a big deal, because if you install them in your home, you won't need to change bulbs every few months, which means fewer trips to the hardware store. If you have high ceilings, using LED lamps means fewer climbs up a ladder and fewer potential falls off a ladder.\n\nBecause they use a fraction of the electricity used by normal bulbs, your electricity bills will go down.\n\nWhy Wouldn't I Want to Use an LED Lamp?\n\nRight now, LED lamps cost a lot more than regular bulbs or compact fluorescents\u2014about twenty times more. In the end, with their super-long life and tiny energy consumption, you'll still wind up saving money. But there aren't that many people willing to spend $20\u201330 for a light bulb, which is why they won't stay at $20\u201330. The world's giant lighting companies\u2014GE, Osram Sylvania, and Philips\u2014are spending most of their research and development money on LED research, and they're not doing this for their health. Prices will come down dramatically over the next few years, in much the same way they did with LCD and plasma flat-panel HDTVs.\n\nHow Can You Motivate People to Spend More Upfront Just for a Better Bulb?\n\nRemember: LED lamps use computer chips to light them up. So these digital lights can easily contain additional chips to accomplish other tasks. For example, companies are now creating LED lamps with chips that can\n\n\u2022 Act as a booster for your Wi-Fi connection, grabbing the wireless signal and amplifying it so it reaches throughout the house.\n\n\u2022 Contain a speaker so sound can come out of the same spot in your ceiling as your light.\n\n\u2022 Learn your movements and automatically shut off or turn on your lights at times when you're usually in or out of a room. That not only saves energy but also can act as a home security device.\n\n\u2022 Control your home's temperature by sensing the heat of a room.\n\nShould I Buy LED Lamps Now or Wait for the Price to Come Down?\n\nIf you have a bit of disposable income, buy a few LED lamps\u2014perhaps one in the shape of a standard bulb (called an \"A\" bulb) that you put in a bedside lamp. If you have recessed lighting in your kitchen, bathroom, or living room, buy a substitute for one of those sizes as well. LED lamps come in all shapes and sizes: standard bulbs, multiple sizes of recessed reflector lamps, low-voltage LED substitutes (the kind you see in track lighting), chandelier lamps, under-cabinet LED strips instead of small fluorescents, and of course, Christmas lights.\n\nBuy one every six months, and you'll probably see a noticeable drop in price each time you do.\n\nWhere Do I Get LED Lamps?\n\nYou'll find them at home improvement stores such as Home Depot and Lowe's, and of course on Amazon.com. Even Costco carries them.\n\nIf you want more information, you can read a simple explanation of LED lamps that I wrote for the Costco Connection magazine at bit.ly\/T9TG8d.\n\nLighting Cheat Sheet\n\nRegular light bulbs are going away, gradually replaced by\n\n\u2022 Energy-efficient halogen bulbs that look similar\n\n\u2022 Compact fluorescent lamps\n\n\u2022 LED lamps\n\nWhat you'll find in each:\n\n\u2022 Regular bulbs: cheap, warm-colored light\n\n\u2022 Compact fluorescents: last up to several years, use much less electricity; bad-looking light\n\n\u2022 LEDs: last about twenty years, use even less electricity, good-looking light; expensive (for now)\n\nWhat to buy:\n\n\u2022 LED bulbs (if you can afford them)\n\n\u2022 Regular bulbs or more efficient halogen bulbs\n\n\u2022 Compact fluorescents (only as a last resort)\n\n16\n\nSimplify Your Life Away from Home: Android, iPad, iPod, iPhone, Oy Vey!\n\n\"Every day I have a routine; I spend fifteen minutes max on the computer. I check to make sure the President's alive, and we're not at war. Then I can get to work.\"\n\n\u2014Rabbi Mordecai Finley\n\n\"Camera phones threaten to turn everyone into amateur paparazzi. We are witnessing our personal space shrink because of the way technology is being used.\"\n\n\u2014Daniel Solove, Professor of Law, George Washington University\n\n\"The basic human needs to become connected remain the same. We can now do that far more easily, instantaneously and cheaply. The age of mass consumer electronics has evolved to the age of personal electronics where everything relevant is with you and everyone knows where you are.\"\n\n\u2014Eisuke Tsuyuzaki\n\nSmartphones are no longer a novelty. Until recently, they were strictly tools for businesspeople to check their e-mail on the go, but now they have become a necessity for everyone from senior citizens to seven-year-olds. Reading e-mail, finding your way with its built-in GPS, accessing the Internet\u2014all of these things make a smartphone a must-have device. Here are some more things you can do with a smartphone:\n\n\u2022 Talk (obviously)\n\n\u2022 Text\n\n\u2022 Stop your kids from texting when they're driving\n\n\u2022 Play games\n\n\u2022 Track your kids\n\n\u2022 Take pictures and movies and e-mail them\n\n\u2022 Track down your phone from a computer if it gets lost or stolen and remotely lock it so no one can use it\n\n\u2022 Use it as a GPS to find your way, with specific directions based on whether you're driving, walking, biking, or taking the bus\n\n\u2022 Use it as a bubble level\n\n\u2022 Use it as a ruler\n\n\u2022 Use it as a flashlight\n\n\u2022 Use it as a magnifying glass\n\n\u2022 Convert dollars to Euros and every other currency\n\n\u2022 Convert miles per gallon to liters per 100 kilometers\n\n\u2022 Play music, both recorded on the phone and streaming from an Internet site\n\n\u2022 Keep track of your appointments on an electronic calendar\n\n\u2022 Check in for a flight without printing a boarding pass\n\n\u2022 Pay for your latte without using a credit card\n\nWhat's an Android?\n\nAndroid isn't a thing; it's an operating system created by Google for products such as computers, tablets, and smartphones. It's the software that allows the products to perform functions such as opening files, naming folders, sorting documents, and moving things around. Only Apple products can use Apple's operating system, but Google's Android can be used by just about any company that wants to incorporate it into their laptops, smartphones, or tablets. There aren't yet many computers that use Google, but there are plenty of smartphones and tablets that do.\n\nJust as you can buy lots of different brands of computers that run Microsoft Windows, you can buy many different brands of smartphones (and increasingly, computers and tablets) that run Android.\n\nHow Does the Android Experience Differ from Apple's?\n\nIn many ways, they're very similar. A lot of the same gestures you use on an Apple portable product, such as pinching to make a picture bigger or smaller, are similar to what's done on an Android device. On smartphones and tablets, both Android and Apple's iOS software allow you to swipe your finger across to get from one screen to the next. Both systems use little icons representing apps, or applications. Smartphones and tablets running both systems offer thousands of apps, and most of the devices include built-in cameras, music players, and navigation functionality.\n\nIn some cases, the differences between Apple and Android functionality are subtle. For example, Apple has perfected what's called a \"rubber-banding\" effect. When you swipe your finger down a screen\u2014say, down a list of e-mails\u2014and you reach the end of the list, the last entry bounces back a bit when you remove your finger from the screen, as if a rubber band were snapping back into place. Although it might seem superfluous, the effect lets you know that you can't go any further on that screen; you don't have to wonder whether you're not swiping the screen properly. That isn't included on Android.\n\nTo get to the apps on an Android device, you have to click on the \"apps\" logo at the bottom of the home screen. With an Apple device, the apps screens are the first things you see.\n\nAll the preference settings for apps are in one place on Apple iOS devices: in the settings app. With an Android device, many functions are reached by touching a submenu button below the screen.\n\nApple extends its simplicity by using one physical button. You push it to get to your app screens, and you double-click it to activate Siri, the not-very-accurate voice navigation system. Android smartphones use three buttons, including one to pull up a submenu of options and another to take you back up one level. For example, if you've opened an e-mail in the mail app, this button will take you back up one level to your list of e-mails. And there's a center button that acts much like Apple's home button: It takes you back to the home screens, where you can see a layout of all your apps.\n\nAt times, those differences are meaningless: You may simply prefer the look of certain apps designed for the iPhone over those that work on Android. For example, both platforms include calculator apps, but for what it's worth, I think the Android version looks better. The numbers are easier to read, with a more pleasing font. However, Apple's version becomes a more sophisticated scientific calculator when the iPhone is turned horizontally; Android's doesn't.\n\nWhich Is Better? Android or Apple's iOS?\n\nThere is no \"better.\" Apple's iOS operating system is simpler to master, but many people are very happy with their Android products. With Android, as with Microsoft's Windows system, you can choose products from many manufacturers. These may use the same operating system, but the products can differ in terms of screen size, placement of buttons, battery life, ruggedness, and so on. Once you understand the Android paradigm, it will become second nature no matter which brand you buy.\n\nAndroid phones use a standard USB mini-plug to charge the phone, and Apple uses its proprietary iPhone connector. If you lose your Android cable, you can always use another that might have come with your digital camera.\n\nIf you lose your Apple cable, you'll have to buy another one.\n\nWith Android's built-in photo app, you have much more functionality than with Apple's iPhone camera app. For example, on the Android phone you can apply cartoon effects to a picture, automatically take a shot only when the subject is smiling, and crop the picture. All of this can be done on an iPhone, but it requires downloading various photo manipulation apps.\n\nApple's iPhone synchs seamlessly with an Apple computer. Enter an address in your iPhone's address book, and it will automatically appear on your iMac or your iPad. You can also synch your Google address book and calendar with a Mac or Windows computer, but it takes a few more steps to set up.\n\nWhichever platform is better right now, it will soon be superseded by a better version from its competitor. As long as multiple operating systems exist, whether that's Apple's iOS, Google's Android, or Microsoft's Windows Mobile, the \"better\" system will constantly change hands.\n\nApple's New Proprietary Connector\n\nEver since the first iPhone, Apple has used the same thirty-pin connector plug, a small, wide affair. Everything that connects to an iPhone, such as car audio systems and speaker docks, has come with that same connector.\n\nBut with the new iPhone 5 and the newest generations of iPads, Apple switched to a much smaller plug the company calls Lightning. The smaller plug was one way that Apple could make the newest iPhone thinner and lighter than its predecessors. And unlike the thirty-pin plug, the Lightning plug is reversible; it connects no matter which end is up.\n\nIf you have an older speaker dock, the new iPhone 5 won't be able to plug into it, unless you buy a Lightning-to-thirty-pin adapter. Apple may eventually approve adapters from third-party companies, but as of this writing, if you want one, you have to get it from Apple.\n\nWhat Are Apps?\n\nShort for applications, apps are little programs that either provide functionality in their own right or act as convenient shortcuts to grabbing information or tools from a Web site. For example, apps with their own functionality include those that turn your smartphone into a calculator, a photo storage device, a camera, a flashlight, or a converter of weights, measures, and currency. Apps that actually access Internet information include the NPR News app, airplane reservation apps, bank account apps, newspaper apps, shopping apps such as Amazon's, the OpenTable restaurant reservation tool, and the Fandango movie timetable and ticket purchase app.\n\nThen Why Do I Need an App If I Can Go to the Actual Web site?\n\nYou could always use a smartphone's Web browser to go to The New York Times Web site instead of using its iPhone app. But despite Steve Jobs's gushing excitement at the first demonstration of this feat when he introduced the original iPhone, it's virtually impossible to look at most Web sites on a smartphone unless you're a child with perfect eyesight.\n\nSome Favorite Apps (Most Are Free)\n\n\u2022 Amazon PriceCheck: Take a picture of a product's UPC barcode, and you'll quickly find out whether you can get it at Amazon for less.\n\n\u2022 CompareMe: What's cheaper? Three for $1.56 or four for $2.23? This app will tell you, and by how much.\n\n\u2022 Flashlight: This turns your iPhone into a flashlight and magnifying glass. Great for restaurants.\n\n\u2022 Google Sky Map (Android phones) and Star Walk: Point your phone toward the sky, and these apps will overlay the constellations above you on your screen, letting you know whether that light is a star or Jupiter.\n\n\u2022 Multi-Convert: This app converts anything: Fahrenheit to centigrade, U.S. dollars to Ukrainian Hryvnias, cubic decameters to U.S. dry pints, U.S. to Australian shoe sizes, miles per U.S. gallon to liters per hundred kilometers, or ergs per second to joules per minute. Crazy.\n\n\u2022 OpenTable: On the road and need a reservation? Make it from your smartphone to OpenTable, and you don't have to wonder whether the bored hostess at the front desk ever bothered to write it down.\n\n\u2022 Square: With the Square app and a tiny free card reader that plugs into your smartphone, you can take credit card payments.\n\n\u2022 Zillow: What's your neighbor's house worth? Zillow will tell you.\n\nQR Codes: That Little Black Box with Patterns That Appears on Many Print Ads\n\nThe box is called a QR or Quick Response code. Invented in the 1990s in Japan, it's essentially a fancy barcode. When you take a picture of the box with your smartphone (by first downloading a free QR reader app), you'll see more information directly on the screen, or you'll be directed to the advertiser's Web site to learn more. Businesses are adopting them because they think that consumers will be more likely to take a picture of a code than enter a long Web site address to get additional information about a product. Utilities are using QR codes to explain to customers why they should stop receiving\n\npaper bills. Vehicle new car stickers have QR codes that will take you to the manufacturer's Web site and the government's fuel economy site. Many companies put codes at the bottom of magazine ads so consumers can grab their smartphones or tablets and get more information.\n\nBoth Apple's iTunes store and Android's Play Store offer many free QR readers. They all work pretty much the same and are simple to use. You open the app, touch the picture-taking button, and focus the screen on the QR code until the code locks into place; you'll know when that happens, as typically a square forms around the code. Then you're done.\n\nAren't Smartphones Very Expensive?\n\nSo you've decided to buy a smartphone. If you're not careful, that can cost you $100 or more per month in fees. Here's how to keep your costs down.\n\nThink about how many minutes of calls you make per month, and get a plan that covers that amount with a bit to spare. You don't want to buy a plan with many more minutes than you need, and you also don't want to get one that comes up short. If you go over your allotted minutes, the mobile company will ding you for crazy amounts of money; it can be as much as 20\u00a2 per minute once you've exceeded your plan.\n\nDo you text? If you text infrequently, buying a text plan may be a waste of money. Although individual texts without a plan cost an obscene amount of money (20\u00a2 per text, although it costs the company fractions of a penny), it may still be cheaper to pay as you go.\n\nWatch your data use. If you watch lots of movies on your smartphone or tablet, that can eat up your allotted data bits and cost you higher fees once you've exceeded your amount.\n\nBlock That Text Spam!\n\nFed up with those obnoxious telemarketing calls at all hours? Now you can get fed up with the same thing on your smartphone. Unwanted text messages\u2014text spam\u2014have invaded cell phones. Not only is it annoying, but unless you have unlimited texting, you're paying for every one of those incoming entreaties to get you to borrow money or sign up for a cheap (usually bogus) mortgage. They're illegal, of course, but that doesn't stop the spammers. Here's how to stop spam texts:\n\n\u2022 AT&T subscribers: Pay $5 per month for Smart Limits for Wireless to selectively block texts from senders you don't want.\n\n\u2022 Sprint: Selectively block texts for free by sending certain commands to \"9999.\" Go to bit.ly\/xL1USV for a list of commands.\n\n\u2022 T-Mobile: Use the E-Mail and Text Tools section of the Web site to set up filters that will selectively block texts.\n\n\u2022 Verizon: Go to the Spam Controls section of the company's Web site for instructions on how to selectively block texts for free: bit.ly\/y0aBLV.\n\n\u2022 What not to do: Don't text \"Stop\" to try and curtail text spams. That only tells the spammers your cell number is legit.\n\nHow Much Data Do I Need?\n\nIf you use a smartphone essentially to send e-mail, you'll use very little data. However, if you plan to view high-definition movies on your iPhone or Android device, watch out: You'll quickly run out of data or be paying overages. A two-hour HD movie can eat up 3\u20135 gigabytes of data, whereas sending thousands of e-mails will use just a fraction of that amount.\n\nTo figure out what size data plan you need, use the handy AT&T calculator at att.com\/att\/datacalculator\/. You estimate how many e-mails, movies, and songs you'll devour, and the calculator tells you what size data plan you probably need.\n\nYou can also buy a family plan; getting multiple phones on one plan will save money.\n\nConsider mobile plans with rollover minutes. Carriers such as AT&T let you roll over unused voice minutes to the next month's allotment. Unused text messages do not roll over.\n\niPhone Texting Tip\n\nIf you're an iPhone user, you can text other iPhone users who are running the latest operating system, for free. With Messages, Apple's texting app, a text message is sent to fellow iPhone users as a free iMessage, using the cellular network rather than the data network. If your text message shows up in blue, it's going out over the free iMessage technology. If it's green, you're paying for it as part of your texting plan, or you'll pay for it on a per-text basis. Even texts to fellow iMessage users may occasionally show up in green. That means that the iMessage network is temporarily unavailable.\n\nCan I Use My Mobile Phone Overseas?\n\nWhen you use your mobile phone in another city in the United States, you almost always pay the same as when you're home. That's because the mobile carriers have worked out roaming deals with carriers throughout the country.\n\nMobile carriers have also worked out roaming deals with companies in other countries, but they're not very advantageous to the users. If you take your iPhone or Android phone to another country, you'll see another company's name where you normally see the familiar AT&T, Sprint, or Verizon name on your screen. Jump on the Orange network in France, the Virgin Mobile network in the United Kingdom, or any other foreign carrier, and you'll probably pay a fortune when you get home.\n\nInternational cell phone usage is not for the faint of heart. Using my iPhone for one week in Israel to access e-mail, listen to NPR, read a few newspaper apps, and look for my hotel with Google Maps rang up a $700 bill. Fortunately, I didn't have to pony up the big bucks; Apple gave me free overseas access to check the costs for a New York Times article I was writing. But most users won't have that advantage.\n\nThere are alternatives, but to understand them, we need to pause for a quick lesson on cell phone technology. The United States uses two different and incompatible cell phone technologies: CDMA and GSM. Europe and most of the rest of the world use GSM; GSM devices typically store some of your phone's information, including its number and your contacts, on a tiny little SIM card.\n\nChina uses mostly CDMA, the system used by Verizon in the United States. These phones don't use SIM cards; all the phone's info is stored on the device. Take a CDMA phone to Europe, and it'll be useless.\n\nErgo, If You Take a GSM Phone from the United States and Bring It to Europe, It'll Work, Right?\n\nMaybe. Our GSM system used by AT&T and T-Mobile operates on different frequencies from the European systems (and New Zealand's, if you're interested). So you'll need a GSM phone that also works on at least one of the frequencies used in the country you are visiting. That's a lot easier than it used to be. For instance, the iPhone is a quad-frequency phone, compatible with European standards. And many other phones today operate on the frequencies used in other countries.\n\nSo If You're an AT&T or T-Mobile Customer, the Problem Is Solved, Right?\n\nWrong. There's still that pesky little problem of costs. Your phone may work, but using it could cost you an arm and a leg. To keep the costs down, you can buy a local SIM card. This will give you your own number in England or Italy or wherever you are, and you'll pay much lower rates.\n\nHint: If you buy a local SIM card, make sure your friends back home have an international calling plan. If they don't, they'll pay up to $1 per minute to talk to you, and they may stop being your friends.\n\nSo, we've solved the international calling problem.\n\nNot really. Even if you have a GSM phone with the right frequencies, you may not be able to use an overseas SIM card. That's because American carriers typically lock their phones electronically, preventing them from being used by other carriers. If you have a locked phone (and most smartphones are locked) from AT&T, it won't work on T-Mobile's network, even though the SIM card from one will actually fit in the other's slot. The same thing holds true if you have a T-Mobile phone and you try to use it on Italy's TIM cellular network or Vodafone in the United Kingdom.\n\nWhy are the cellular companies such meanies? Here's what they're thinking: \"Hey buddy, we gave you a great deal, charging you only $200 for a smartphone that actually cost us $600. Do you think we're crazy enough to let you use it on one of our competitors' networks and lose all that extra income we can make by charging you outrageous roaming charges?\"\n\nSo what you need to do is unlock your phone. T-Mobile will unlock your phone after four months of service, and AT&T will unlock your phone after your contract is up (but not before); to get that done, call their customer service line, but do so before you buy a new phone and start a new contract. Once you register a new device, the cellular provider may decide not to unlock the old one. If you have a GSM iPhone that's still under contract, you can unlock it yourself. If you know someone whose idea of a fun time when he was a kid was to take a telephone apart to see what made it work, direct him or her to <http:\/\/www.iphonehacks.com\/ultrasn0w> or blog.iphone-dev.org for a free but pretty complex unlocking method. The danger with these unofficial unlocking methods is that if you don't really know what you're doing, you could damage your phone.\n\niPhone owners can get their devices easily unlocked at chronicunlocks.com. The fee is based on which carrier you use. Unlocking occurs automatically a few hours after you pay the fee.\n\nAndroid users can try unlockandroid.net (for some Samsung models) or android-unlock.net. But if you're the kind of person who needs this book, I suspect you won't be tempted to try it.\n\nBut What If I Can't Unlock My Phone, or It Won't Work in the Country I'm in?\n\nSo let's say you're stuck with a locked phone or one that won't work in the country you're visiting. Here are a few more alternatives:\n\n\u2022 Purchase a reduced-price international calling plan from your carrier\n\n\u2022 Rent an unlocked phone temporarily from your carrier\n\n\u2022 Buy or borrow a cheap, unlocked GSM phone on eBay\n\n\u2022 AT&T, Sprint, and Verizon offer reduced-price overseas calling plans. If you check your e-mail mostly using a free Wifi hotspot and make just a few minutes of calls, you can still occasionally check your e-mail while out and about abroad, and pay about $100 for a week's worth of data. Alternatively, when you get to the country you're visiting and if you speak their language, buy a cheap pay-as-you-go phone from a local phone shop. Many big airports have cellular shops in the terminal. You can then pay much lower rates for local calls and top up your available balance when you're running low on minutes.\n\n\u2022 Use Skype, either from your computer or your smartphone. Whenever you're in an Internet hotspot (they're pretty easy to find in most major hotels and at coffee houses like Starbucks), you can make free calls to people who have signed up for Skype. If you're using a laptop to do the calling and it's got a built-in Web cam, you can see them as well. Skype actually has become the best way to communicate with friends and family around the world.\n17\n\nTablets: Android and Apple\n\n\"Another former Apple executive who was there at the time said the tablets kept getting shelved at Apple because Mr. Jobs, whose incisive critiques are often memorable, asked, in essence, what they were good for besides surfing the Web in the bathroom.\"\n\n\u2014\"Just a Touch Away, the Elusive Table PC,\" New York Times, October 4, 2009\n\nApple's first portable computer, the Mac Portable, weighed almost sixteen pounds, had an optional 40-megabyte hard drive, and cost $6,500.\n\nThe newest iPad weighs less than one and a half pounds, comes with at least 16 gigabytes of storage (almost 320 times as much as the first portable), is at least a zillion times faster at processing data than the portable, and costs as little as $500.\n\nIt's also captivated the world's imagination. In the first three days after the 2012 iPad went on sale, Apple sold three million around the world, three times more than the first iPad during its initial weekend. When the first iPad went on sale, a popular YouTube video showed an ecstatic hundred-year-old woman using it to access the Internet for the first time.\n\nThe iPad paradigm of pushing objects around on the screen, pulling two fingers apart to make them bigger, and squeezing to shrink them has become part of the popular culture. Toddlers know how to operate iPhones and assume that they can see photos on any object they pick up simply by swiping across the screen.\n\nBut iPads are not the same as computers, and Amazon's Kindle book reader (known as an e-Reader) is not the same as an iPad.\n\nWhat's the Difference Between a Kindle, a Nook, and an iPad?\n\nAmazon's Kindle models and Barnes and Noble's Nooks are designed primarily for reading. They use a technology that is easy to read in bright sunlight and uses very little battery power. You may not need to charge a Kindle more than once a month.\n\nOn the other hand, Apple's iPad is designed primarily for everything else and can also be used for reading. It creates an image using an LCD screen that's tough to read in bright light (don't even think about taking it to the beach), and it may need recharging every day or so if you use it frequently. The iPad has a bigger screen than many Kindle models; the color display makes it ideal to go on the Web, take and view photos and movies, and play games.\n\nWhat Can't You Do with an iPad or Any Other Kind of Tablet?\n\nHave you been to Disneyland or Disney World? If you have, you know that unlike other amusement parks, it's impossible to see the inner workings of the place.\n\nYou can't peek behind the stores on Main Street, or you'd see all the scaffolding that holds up the storefronts, and the illusion of this impossibly clean and tranquil town would disappear. And it would be messy; you'd see all the pipes and electrical cables, fallen nails, and rat turds that are part of any amusement park.\n\nThe iPad\u2014and actually all computing tablets\u2014is designed to be like Disney's Main Street. You can't see the structure holding everything up. You can't tinker with the operating system, throw away files that may be messing with its smooth operation, or tweak the way it works. You can't peek behind the fa\u00e7ade the tablet makers created. And because tablets don't have physical keyboards, you can't type on them as easily as you can on a real computer.\n\nWhy Would I Want a Tablet, Whether It's an iPad or an Android-Based Device?\n\n\u2022 To carry a lightweight computing device instead of a heavier laptop\n\n\u2022 To read books\n\n\u2022 To have a big screen to show off your photos\n\n\u2022 Because you don't like a physical keyboard\n\n\u2022 To avoid dealing with computer viruses and constant system freezes\n\n\u2022 To easily play video games on a device that's easy to carry onto a plane\n\n\u2022 Because you like a lot of the apps on your iPhone, and you want to use them on a larger screen\n\n\u2022 To watch movies and TV shows while you're traveling.\n\n\u2022 To store movies and TV shows and transfer them wirelessly to your big-screen TV\n\nWhy Wouldn't I Want a Tablet?\n\n\u2022 You hate typing on a virtual keyboard, and you're much faster on a real one.\n\n\u2022 You want more control over the software you use.\n\n\u2022 You like tinkering with the innards of your computer.\n\n\u2022 A tablet screen is too small.\n\n\u2022 You want to watch Flash videos (many videos are only in the Flash format, and many Web sites use Flash for animations). If you have an iPad, there's no easy way to watch Flash content.\n\n\u2022 You can't afford one (before you give up, look for a used tablet on eBay). \n18\n\nYour Digital Life, Everywhere\n\n\"What turns me on about the digital age, what excited me personally, is that you have closed the gap between dreaming and doing. You see, it used to be that if you wanted to make a record of a song, you needed a studio and a producer. Now, you need a laptop. . . . Imagination has been decoupled from the old constraints.\"\n\n\u2014Bono, TED Talks, February 2005\n\nDigital photos and music were once confined to a computer. If you wanted to see or listen to them on your TV or smartphone, you had to connect them with a cable to transfer the files from one to the other or hook up your computer or smartphone to your TV with other kinds of cables to watch everything on the big screen. Now Apple has figured out how to make it easy. It's called iCloud.\n\nWhat's iCloud?\n\nEverything at Apple starts with an \"i.\" Even Walter Isaacson's best-selling biography of Steve Jobs, called simply Steve Jobs, was originally titled iSteve: The Book of Jobs. With iCloud, you can automatically sync all your digital books, e-mail, Web bookmarks, movies (purchased from Apple's online iTunes store), music (purchased from Apple's online iTunes store), and recent photos you've taken with your iPad or iPhone so that they all automatically appear on all the other Apple devices you own, without doing anything.\n\nThat means that if you own an Apple TV\u2014a device that lets you watch movies and TV shows you've purchased from the Apple store on your TV\u2014you can also automatically transfer your movies, music, and photos from, say, your computer or iPhone to your Apple TV and then play them on your TV.\n\nThis magic trick presupposes one thing: that you have a wireless Internet connection in your home. If you do, you can wirelessly stream all this stuff from one Apple product to another. The content is not actually going from one device to another but from a copy stored in the cloud, which is a great big computer storage facility somewhere in the world, to your iPhone or iPad or iWhatever.\n\nThere are some nifty things you can do. For instance, you can\n\n\u2022 Take a picture with your second- or third-generation iPad and then show the picture to your friends in another city on your iPhone, even if you don't have your iPad with you.\n\n\u2022 Listen to music you purchased from Apple on your iPhone at home, then listen to it on your iPad at work, even if you didn't actually transfer the files to your iPhone.\n\n\u2022 Take a picture with your iPhone and, a few minutes later, see it magically appear on your computer, where you can touch it up and print it.\n\n\u2022 Using iWork, Apple's version of Microsoft Office, create text documents, spreadsheets, or slide shows (generically known as PowerPoints) on your computer, and then automatically see and edit them on your iPad while you're on the train home from work.\n\n\u2022 Listen to the songs stored on your computer (or iPhone, iPad, or iPod Touch) you didn't buy from Apple. For $25 per year, Apple will store copies of your own music that it finds in iTunes on its servers, for you to access on your other Apple products.\n\nBut I Don't Have iCloud\/iPad\/iPhone\/Mac. What Can I Do?\n\nIf you're using a smartphone that's not an Apple product, or a tablet that's not an iPad, you can still sync your documents and photos and music and movies.\n\nHere are two ways to do it:\n\n\u2022 Dropbox: Download the Dropbox app, and then drag files into the special Dropbox folder. Those files automatically sync to the cloud, and from the cloud to every other device on which you've installed Dropbox.\n\nAdvantages: Free; great for working on a text file at home and then finding the newest version automatically updated on your laptop at work.\n\nDisadvantages: The actual file (not a copy) resides in your special Dropbox folder, a disadvantage if you like keeping files in specific folders and subfolders. Music files won't automatically appear in an application such as iTunes; you'll have to place them there. Unlike Apple's iCloud, it's not automatic. You actually have to drag a file to a special folder to keep things in sync.\n\n\u2022 SugarSync: This for-purchase application works with Macs, PCs, Apple products, Androids, BlackBerrys, Windows phones, Symbian phones, and the Kindle Fire tablet.\n\nAdvantage: It works on many different operating systems, so you can sync files from a Windows PC to a Mac, to an Android phone, and so on.\n\nDisadvantage: You have to pay for it if you want a decent amount of storage. The first 5 gigabytes of storage is free. If you need more, 30 gigabytes will cost you $50 per year.\n\nApple's iCloud also gives you 5 gigabytes for free, but Apple doesn't count purchased music, movies, apps, books, TV shows, or your recently taken photos in that limit.\n19\n\nSimplify Your Car\n\nCars used to be as simple to operate as TVs. Put in the key. Start the engine. Go. If your existing car is five years old or more, this may not have hit you yet, but today's vehicles are as connected as the home. E-mail, texting, Blu-ray discs, and Internet access are all available in today's cars. Trying to figure out how to get all that gear fired up, and what you really need, can be as difficult as setting up a wireless modem.\n\nBluetooth: Necessary or Not?\n\nBluetooth is a wireless technology that lets you send your cell phone's signal to the car's speaker system. Unlike Wi-Fi, the wireless technology that sends Internet signals around your house, Bluetooth operates only up to 30 feet, so if your cell phone is too far from the car, you won't be able to transfer its signals.\n\nDo I want it? Yes. Bluetooth lets you speak on your cell phone without holding it. Which means you'll be less likely to get yourself killed while you're speaking on the phone because you'll be watching the road and not looking at the phone's screen. The bad news is that many studies show it's just as dangerous to speak on a cell phone whether you're actually holding it or not, so your efforts may come to naught.\n\nWith many cars, you can also use Bluetooth to send the music that's stored on your iPhone through the car's speakers. If you have a radio station app, such as the NPR app, you can also listen to distant radio stations through your car radio. It's like having satellite radio for free.\n\nDo I Want (or Need) GPS Navigation?\n\nYes, with caveats. The biggest benefit is that you'll (almost) never get lost again. With a navigation system you'll know exactly where to turn and where to find the nearest coffee shop, hospital, supermarket, or airport.\n\nYou can still get lost even with a GPS system. The instructions about when to turn are not always clear. Do they really mean 50 yards before I turn, or should I make that left sooner? Why does the street onto which I'm supposed to turn have a different name? Why does the main route through the town look like a back alley? This can't be right!\n\nOn the other hand, if you love the romance of getting lost, of pulling out a dog-eared paper map and trying to figure out which road you're actually on, of seeing the road you're traveling on in context with your surroundings, that will never happen again once you use a GPS.\n\nNavigation systems are becoming ubiquitous, but getting one that's built into the car can set you back thousands of dollars. There are portable models that can be used in many cars, and they cost just one tenth as much.\n\nShould the GPS Be Built into the Car, or Should I Get a Portable Unit?\n\nThere are some advantages to a built-in unit. The screen fits right into the dash, and it incorporates other functions, such as a backup camera or touch controls. Built-in GPS units also have bigger, easier-to-read screens. But the portable, hand-held units are much cheaper, and you can take them with you when you rent a car.\n\nHowever, the portables are unsightly; with cords dangling, you have to hang one from the windshield and plug it into the cigarette lighter.\n\nGPS on the Cheap\n\nWhy buy a GPS unit when you have one already built into your smartphone? GPS apps, both free and low-cost, are available for both Apple and Android phones.\n\nWith a smartphone GPS app, you can walk around an unfamiliar city and never get lost. These are the best smartphone GPS apps:\n\nGoogle Maps: Very good on the iPhone, great on Android. On the iPhone, Google Maps has officially been supplanted by Maps, Apple's own mapping program that, as of this writing, has not proved as useful or as accurate as Google Maps.\n\nMotionX GPS Drive: For the iPhone only, two bucks is all you pay for the basic service, which can help you find your way home or find a coffee shop. You get all the directions you need except voice directions. For $10 per year, you get voice commands and real-time traffic information to help put you on a faster route. Once you get where you're going, you can indicate the spot where you parked in the app, so you can find your car later.\n\nDo I Want a Backup Camera?\n\nDefinitely. When you back up, the camera lets you easily see what's behind you. Newer models project lines on a screen to show you exactly when you're about to hit your garbage can (or the small kid playing behind you). With age, it becomes more difficult to turn one's head completely around. Backup cameras do the job for you, and they are due to become standard equipment in all cars in the next few years.\n\nShould I Get a Blind Spot Detection System?\n\nProbably not. As the name suggests, the system beeps when you're inadvertently changing lanes and someone is right in your blind spot. There's a much cheaper solution in wide use throughout the world: convex driver's side mirrors. Just like the \"objects are larger than they appear\" mirrors on the passenger's side, a convex driver's side mirror widens the angle of view and eliminates the driver's side blind spot.\n\nIf you drive a European or Japanese car, you can easily find the correct convex driver's mirror for your car on the Internet. Are you driving American? Manufacturers such as Ford have begun to put a half-convex\/half-regular mirror on the driver's side. If you don't have one, buy a small stick-on convex mirror from the shop in the car wash.\n\nI Have Apps on My Smartphone. Why Would I Want Them in My Car?\n\nJust like your smartphone and your TV, cars now come with apps built into the vehicle. For example, with Toyota's enTune system, you can touch the screen to access OpenTable and make restaurant reservations, look up things using the Bing search engine, and listen to music through Pandora, a Web site that lets you create your own personalized channels of music by specifying the type of music or performer you like. Similar services are offered by Audi, Cadillac, Dodge, and others.\n\nIf you have apps on your smartphone, you may not need them. You'll probably have to pay a monthly fee for the car versions, but with many contemporary cars, you can access the smartphone apps either by transmitting them to the car with your Bluetooth connection or by connecting the smartphone to the car's entertainment system using the car's built-in port. Depending on the car brand, you may attach your device with a special cable (as found in Audis) or a standard USB cable.\n20\n\nSatellite Radio\n\nYou'll want this feature, which allows hundreds of specially programmed radio stations to be delivered to your car or, if you have the equipment, to your home, via satellite.\n\nOnce there were two separate competing companies called Sirius and XM, but they've now combined and offer the same programming that's hard to beat. Carefully programmed channels offer everything from 1940s music through heavy metal and electronic dance. Old radio shows, sports, cable news, religion, and politics channels are unique. Because it's digital, the sound is crystal clear; delivered via satellite, the music never fades. When you're driving through the Mojave desert, you'll now have more than the two local religious stations from which to choose.\n21\n\nHD Radio\n\nEvery form of entertainment has become digitized. Movies are now delivered to theaters on hard drives instead of film. Cameras use SD cards, not Kodak film. Digital signals create the super-sharp high-definition images we see on our HDTVs.\n\nUntil recently, the only form of entertainment that hadn't become digital was standard old broadcast radio, and now that's changed. Digital broadcast radio\u2014cheekily called HD Radio\u2014delivers the same local channels we've always listened to, but now they're digital.\n\nJust like satellite radio (Sirius\/XM), HD radio is static-free; unlike satellite radio, it's still available only in your local area. But digital offers another advantage. The digital signal can actually be compressed\u2014squeezed together to make a smaller signal, so to speak. That means multiple channels can be shoved into the space normally needed, in the analog world, to transmit just one channel. So if you're listening to your favorite local station in HD Radio, you may also be able to get several other stations\u2014called subchannels\u2014that they've tacked onto their main, regular station. For example, a local news station may add several music subchannels to their main offering.\n\nTo find out if there are any subchannels, you don't have to do anything. The HD radio will let you tune in to any that are available.\n22\n\nBuy This, Not That: The Bottom Line on Consumer Electronics\n\nWhen buying high-tech electronics, it pays to be choosy. If you buy everything the salesperson in Best Buy, Sears, or Walmart recommends, you'll need a second mortgage. And much of what they recommend you don't need.\n\nOne of the great benefits of the digitization of everything is that the shades of gray that used to define a product have shrunk. As you may recall from high school, digital is a series of ones and zeros. Something is either on or off, working or not, perfect or nothing. That's why an HDTV image doesn't degrade; it just disappears. Satellite radio signals don't fade; they shut down in the middle of a song when you go through a tunnel. On the other hand, because so many digital products are made by a handful of contractors, mostly in China, similar quality is achievable from many different companies.\n\nGone are the days when a Sony Trinitron represented the pinnacle of television picture quality. Once, Sony sets were discernably different from the competition's. Today, companies such as Panasonic, Sharp, and Sony are getting trounced by startups like Vizio that can purchase the same components that used to be available only to the big boys. So here's the reality: Electronic products continually get less expensive. Similar performance can be found from many manufacturers. But poor build quality still abounds.\n\nForget the tech specs, the breathless advice from the salespeople, the need to have every single new bell and whistle. Whether it's TV or a digital camera, you don't need to jump for the latest and greatest. Here's a rundown of recommendations that will save you time and money as you make your way through the electronic maze of today's world.\n\nDo I Need an Extended Warranty?\n\nNo. As Consumer Reports and others (including me) regularly recommend, don't waste your money on extended warranties. Companies such as Best Buy push them hard on consumers for one simple reason: They're big money makers. Given the cutthroat price competition that all electronics retailers face, they need to do whatever they can to eke out every cent possible from their customers.\n\nThe truth is that if they're going to fail, most electronic products will do so within the period of the original warranty. There are always exceptions, of course. One model of microwave oven I owned failed twice, each time a year after the factory warranty was up. With the third one I bought the extended warranty; when it failed, I got a free microwave. I bought the same brand repeatedly because it was the only one that fit in the kitchen's space. But one exception does not negate the rule.\n\nHow Do I Choose a PC? How Do I Choose a Mac?\n\nIf you want to use the Windows operating system, buy a name-brand computer. If you choose a Mac, you can get only a name-brand computer: Apple's.\n\nWhat Tablet Should I Buy: An Android-Based Product or an Apple iPad?\n\nIf you can afford an Apple iPad, that model remains the one to beat. If an iPad is too expensive and you choose one running the Android operating system (made by Samsung, Vizio, and others), make sure the screen is readable even when you tilt it; some cheaper models use LCD screens that must be viewed straight on or the image fades. When you tilt the screen 90 degrees to view it horizontally instead of vertically, the image should alter its position smoothly, not in a delayed, herky-jerky manner.\n\nDoes an Android Tablet Offer Enough Apps?\n\nHow many is enough? Don't worry about numbers. Think only about the apps you need. It's not practical to list in this book all the best apps because the number and names constantly change. Instead, do a search for \"best Android tablet apps\" or \"best iPad apps\" and see whether the ones on offer appeal to you.\n\nHow to Choose a Flat-Screen TV\n\nMost of the specs manufacturers use, such as brightness, contrast ratio, screen refresh rate, and megahertz are simply bogus. Unfortunately, there is no standard scale they all subscribe to. Rather, manufacturers have figured out ways to weasel the numbers and make them seem bigger and better than they actually are. So just ignore most numbers. If your TV is 42 inches or larger, make sure it is capable of displaying a resolution of 1,080 pixels (that's one number that can't be made up).\n\nThere is no such thing as an LED TV. LED lights are simply used in LCD TVs to illuminate the screen. LED backlit HDTVs produce a better contrast, and hence a sharper image, than HDTVs that use LED edge lit technology. LED backlit HDTVs are also more expensive.\n\nOLED TVs are the next big thing. This technology produces absolutely beautiful pictures on an ultra-thin TV, better and thinner than LCD or plasma sets. The only problem: Right now, OLED TVs are super-expensive. Once OLED TVs drop in price, give them serious consideration.\n\nDigital Cameras\n\nThe first HDTV cameras were enormous, expensive pieces of hardware. Today, you can shoot HDTV on an iPhone. The newest smartphones come with enough pixels to create perfectly acceptable, sharp images. And built-in photo manipulation software lets users perform minor edits such as cropping, altering colors, and getting rid of red eye, right in the phone. With a smartphone or many tablets such as the iPad, you can take a picture or an HD-quality video and send it directly to someone's e-mail account or post it on Facebook or Twitter.\n\nWith a standard digital camera, you first have to transfer the photos to your computer or tablet and then e-mail or post them. That's why the sale of point-and-shoot digital cameras, the inexpensive models that don't have interchangeable lenses, is plummeting. Smartphones are rapidly becoming the Swiss Army Knife of the digital age. If you're not a professional photographer and just like to take what used to be called snapshots, a modern smartphone is probably all you'll need to do the job.\n\nThe Connected Car\n\nYes, you'll want Bluetooth, but with navigation systems, there are caveats.\n\nBuilt in navigation systems still cost as much as $2,000. For $200 or less, you can buy a portable navigation system, stick it on your windshield, and take it with you when you travel. Most contain Bluetooth connectivity, giving you Bluetooth features in older vehicles.\n\nApps? Some of them. Car companies are looking for new ways to get monthly fees from drivers, so they're trying to charge for the use of apps such as Pandora and OpenTable. If you have a smartphone, you can probably transmit the music from its apps to your car's stereo by using Bluetooth. And many portable navigation systems include apps at no extra charge.\n\nLighting\n\nIt's probably not a good idea to switch to compact fluorescents, but you should consider LEDs when replacing lamps that are used frequently. LED lamp prices are dropping precipitously, and they're now available in a wide range of brightnesses and shapes. Soon an LED equivalent will be available for almost every type of lamp.\n\nPhoning to and from Abroad\n\nHere's what you can do to avoid sky-high charges from your cell phone company when you are in another country. Buy a local SIM card if you have an unlocked cell phone from AT&T or T-Mobile. Or buy a cheap pay-as-you-go phone from a local cellular company in the country you're visiting; you can typically do this at the arrival airport.\n\nThe least expensive way to call other countries from the United States is to use a company such as Pingo or Skype to make calls abroad. Then you can avoid the monthly fees from companies such as AT&T and their higher per-minute fees.\n\nThe idea for _Does This Plug into That?_ came while I was walking through the Consumer Electronics Show in Las Vegas several years ago. My friend and colleague Danny Abelson noted that many people haven't a clue as to how consumer electronics work; it was his supposition that I would be the perfect person to explain it, for which I thank him.\n\nMy agent, Jane Dystel, encouraged the development of the proposal and offered keen insights into the subject material. Chris Schillig, my editor, was very helpful in shaping the work and offering feedback from the perspective of both an accomplished professional and a typical reader. Jay Rubin acted as an important sounding board and reality check.\n\nThroughout the process, my dear wife, Carol, as she has always graciously and lovingly done, supported and encouraged my work. And without the good humor and high energy of my family, the task would have been more arduous. They include my mother-in-law Annabelle, Tanya and Matt, Stacey and Joe, and grandchildren Bella, Hannah, Grace, Ivy, Mia, and Noah.\n\n1. If you want an _unbiased_ guide to consumer electronics, this is not the book. I have many opinions (e.g., that Apple's products are generally better than the competition's) gleaned over years of writing about technology. I express them freely here. You don't have to agree with me.\n\n2. Prometheus stole fire from the gods and gave it to mortals.\n\n3.  <http:\/\/www.apple.com\/iphone\/>.\n\n4. <http:\/\/tcrn.ch\/NJb40H>. Hint: Whenever you have a very long Web site link (or URL) that you want to send to someone or quote, shorten it as I did, using the Web site <http:\/\/www.bit.ly>. You cut and paste the original Web site address into the bit.ly page, and bit.ly shortens it for you, for free.\n\n5. <http:\/\/bit.ly\/v9TW1P>.\n\n6. To protect your files, server farms are high-security affairs; even their location is often not discussed. The buildings can be huge; Apple's North Carolina facility is said to be 500,000 square feet and to have cost $1 billion.\n\n7. Think it won't happen? Remember how CDs made cassette tapes obsolete? And how 5-inch floppy discs gave way to 3\u00bd-inch floppies and then were replaced by CDs? It's only a matter of time before the hard drive disappears as well.\n\n8. They really are the best brownies\u2014simple, and you don't need a mix. is.gd\/D4ooDS.\n\n9. One caveat: If you're also using a home theater audio receiver, you may be able to connect all the cables from the DVR into the audio receiver and then connect cables from the audio receiver into the TV. By doing this, you can also use the audio receiver as a central control station. For example, you can touch a button on the receiver that might typically be labeled \"SAT\" to watch satellite TV, or another button labeled \"DVD\" to watch a disc. Then the audio and video from the appropriate source (DVD player, cable box) will automatically be directed to the HDTV.\n\n10. Washington Post; wapo.st\/PABun1.\n\n11. bit.ly\/RzmSzW.\n\n12. CDMA stands for Code Division Multiple Access; GSM is Global System for Mobile Communications.\n\n13. SIM stands for Subscriber Identity Module.\n\n14. bit.ly\/T18Evf.\n\n15. There's an exception to that. You can alter the look of the iPad's screen (as well as other tablets running the Android operating system) in ways that Apple and other manufacturers don't want, if you jailbreak your portable device. To do that requires running one of several software applications. Once you jailbreak your iPad, for example, you can install and run applications that Apple hasn't approved. Despite the word used to describe it, jailbreaking of your iPad or iPhone is completely legal (at least in the United States).\n\n16. The first-generation iPad didn't have a built-in camera.\n\n17. The operating system used by many Nokia smartphones.\n\n**Sharing your thoughts can help us improve our ebooks. We would appreciate your feedback. Thank you!  \nebooks@amuniversal.com**\n\n_Does This Plug into That?_ copyright \u00a9 2014 by Eric Taub. All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except in the case of reprints in the context of reviews.\n\nAndrews McMeel Publishing, LLC\n\nan Andrews McMeel Universal company\n\n1130 Walnut Street, Kansas City, Missouri 64106\n\nwww.andrewsmcmeel.com\n\nISBN: 978-1-4494-2698-9\n\nLibrary of Congress Control Number: 2012954169\n\nATTENTION: SCHOOLS AND BUSINESSES\n\nAndrews McMeel books are available at quantity discounts with bulk purchase for educational, business, or sales promotional use. For information, please e-mail the Andrews McMeel Publishing Special Sales Department: specialsales@amuniversal.com\n\nEric Taub is a leading technology consultant for Apple, IBM, Microsoft, Panasonic, and other companies. A consumer technology writer for The New York Times, Taub has written hundreds of articles that take arcane, esoteric, technical subjects and turn them into works that both educate and entertain. He has also written two other best-selling books and contributed to the Los Angeles Times, Talk, Playgirl, Parade, The Daily Beast, and many other publications. \n","meta":{"redpajama_set_name":"RedPajamaBook"}}
+{"text":"\n\n**\u00ab L'abus d'alcool est dangereux pour la sant\u00e9. Pour appr\u00e9cier : consommez avec mod\u00e9ration. \u00bb**\n\n## **Des ap\u00e9ritifs & des liqueurs personnalis\u00e9s...**\n\n_... c'est ce que ce petit livre vous propose de faire, ou plut\u00f4t de cr\u00e9er, car il s'agit v\u00e9ritablement de cr\u00e9ation. Gr\u00e2ce \u00e0 ce manuel vous allez pouvoir produire des ap\u00e9ritifs et des liqueurs d'un go\u00fbt nouveau, diff\u00e9rent de celui des boissons du commerce ou de celles que fabrique votre voisin, parce que vous utiliserez les ingr\u00e9dients que vous avez personnellement \u00e0 votre disposition (ou que vous pouvez vous procurer \u00e0 bon march\u00e9) et que vous doserez \u00ab \u00e0 votre go\u00fbt \u00bb le sucre, l'alcool, les ar\u00f4mes, etc._\n\n_\u00c0 la lecture de ces premi\u00e8res lignes, les amateurs de recettes toutes pr\u00eates sont peut-\u00eatre d\u00e9j\u00e0 un peu d\u00e9\u00e7us. Qu'ils se rassurent! Ce livre contient aussi quelques bonnes recettes d\u00e9crites avec pr\u00e9cision, choisies parce qu'elles ont fait l'unanimit\u00e9 par leurs hautes qualit\u00e9s gustatives. Mais qu'ils ne regrettent pas trop de ne pas en trouver davantage. Bien souvent, lorsqu'on applique \u00e0 la lettre ce type de recette, on obtient un r\u00e9sultat d\u00e9cevant: soit qu'il y avait une erreur dans les proportions indiqu\u00e9es, soit que la m\u00e9thode \u00e0 utiliser n'\u00e9tait pas suffisamment bien expliqu\u00e9e, soit que les composants qu'on avait \u00e0 sa disposition ne convenaient pas exactement (exemple : un alcool trop fort ou trop parfum\u00e9, des feuilles s\u00e9ch\u00e9es au Heu de feuilles fra\u00eeches...)._\n\n_Le but de cet ouvrage n'est certes pas de vous inciter \u00e0 boire davantage de boissons alcoolis\u00e9es, ni de vous faire r\u00e9aliser des \u00e9conomies substantielles. L'int\u00e9r\u00eat de faire soi-m\u00eame ses \u00ab boissons de prestige \u00bb est tout autre. D'abord, vous aurez un r\u00e9el plaisir \u00e0 \u00e9laborer un ap\u00e9ritif ou une liqueur pour la premi\u00e8re fois, \u00e0 d\u00e9couvrir et analyser le r\u00e9sultat obtenu (couleur, odeur, saveur), puis \u00e0 l'am\u00e9liorer si vous le souhaitez. Quel loisir passionnant! Ensuite vous serez fier de servir \u00e0 vos amis quelque chose de personnel et d'original. Et puis, soyez s\u00fbr qu'une bouteille de votre composition sera un cadeau toujours appr\u00e9ci\u00e9._\n\n_Savoir et comprendre ce que sont toutes ces vari\u00e9t\u00e9s de vermouths, quinquinas, mistelles, ratafias, cr\u00e8mes... fait aussi un peu partie de notre culture. Et la meilleure fa\u00e7on de conna\u00eetre, c'est encore d'exp\u00e9rimenter soi-m\u00eame. Alors devenez liquoriste amateur!_\n\n# **LES INGR\u00c9DIENTS**\n\nAp\u00e9ritifs et liqueurs ont la plupart de leurs composants en commun : alcool, sucre, plantes (fruits, feuilles, fleurs...). Ce sont surtout les proportions qui diff\u00e8rent. Toutefois beaucoup d'ap\u00e9ritifs faciles \u00e0 faire chez soi n\u00e9cessitent aussi du vin, ce qui est rarement le cas des liqueurs. Comment choisir ces divers \u00e9l\u00e9ments ?\n\n## **L'alcool**\n\nC'est un ingr\u00e9dient indispensable pour obtenir le type de boissons qui nous int\u00e9ressent, car celles-ci sont \u00ab alcoolis\u00e9es \u00bb, non par suite d'une fermentation (comme dans le cas du vin, du cidre, de la bi\u00e8re...), mais par addition d'alcool. Pour cette raison, on les appelle aussi des \u00ab spiritueux \u00bb.\n\nIl vous faut donc de l'alcool, ou plut\u00f4t un liquide qui en contient beaucoup (l'alcool \u00ab absolu \u00bb n'existe pratiquement pas). Mais attention, l'alcool contenu ne doit pas \u00eatre n'importe lequel! Il ne peut s'agir que de l'alcool \u00e9thylique ou \u00e9thanol, \u00e0 ne pas confondre avec d'autres alcools comme l'alcool m\u00e9thylique ou m\u00e9thanol, extr\u00eamement dangereux pour la sant\u00e9. Les alcools dits \u00ab \u00e0 br\u00fbler \u00bb ou \u00ab d\u00e9natur\u00e9s \u00bb sont bien s\u00fbr totalement proscrits.\n\n### **_L'alcool du pharmacien_**\n\nBeaucoup de recettes anciennes indiquaient de prendre, pour leur r\u00e9alisation, de l'alcool \u00e0 90% achet\u00e9 en pharmacie. Il s'agit d'alcool \u00e9thylique; il en existe aussi \u00e0 70%. Attention le pharmacien vend aussi de l'alcool \u00ab modifi\u00e9 \u00bb rendu impropre \u00e0 la consommation par l'addition d'une substance odorante (du camphre) et d'un colorant (la tartrazine).\n\nCependant, sachez qu'actuellement, la vente d'alcool \u00e0 90% en pharmacie est limit\u00e9e en volume \u00e0 250 ml (0,25 I) par achat et que cette limitation ayant \u00e9t\u00e9 institu\u00e9e pour lutter contre l'alcoolisme, l'utilisation de cet alcool pour fabriquer des boissons est interdite. Ce type d'alcool en raison de sa tr\u00e8s forte teneur en \u00e9thanol (90 %), permettrait pourtant de r\u00e9aliser des extraits v\u00e9g\u00e9taux tr\u00e8s rapides et tr\u00e8s efficaces. De plus, \u00e9tant pratiquement neutre, il ne masquerait pas comme le font certaines eaux-de-vie les ar\u00f4mes des autres composants.\n\n### **_L'alcool des magasins_**\n\nDans les grandes surfaces corn-me dans les petites \u00e9piceries, il est possible d'acheter divers alcools.\n\nLe plus simple et le moins cher (environ 60 F le litre) est vendu g\u00e9n\u00e9ralement sous le nom de \u00ab eau-de-vie sp\u00e9ciale fruits \u00bb (ou sous un nom voisin), car il est destin\u00e9 principalement \u00e0 l'\u00e9laboration de \u00ab fruits \u00e0 l'eau-de-vie \u00bb. C'est une eau-de-vie qui contient 40% vol. d'alcool (anciennement : 40\u00b0. Pour la commodit\u00e9 nous \u00e9crirons syst\u00e9matiquement le taux d'alcoolisation en %) dont le go\u00fbt peu marqu\u00e9 s'adapte bien \u00e0 la majorit\u00e9 des compositions.\n\nOn trouve \u00e9galement sans difficult\u00e9 des alcools vieillis dans des f\u00fbts (de ch\u00eane le plus souvent), reconnaissables \u00e0 leur couleur marron plus ou moins fonc\u00e9 : rhum (issu de la canne \u00e0 sucre), bourbon et whisky (alcool de grain), calvados (eau-de-vie de cidre), cognac et armagnac (eau-de-vie de vin), marc, brandy, etc. Diff\u00e9rentes eaux-de-vie blanches, incolores car n'ayant pas vieilli en f\u00fbt, sont aussi couramment commercialis\u00e9es : kirsch, vodka, rhum blanc, eau-de-vie de prune (mirabelle, quetsche), de poire (William), de framboise, etc.\n\nCes alcools, excellents de go\u00fbt, ont l'inconv\u00e9nient d'\u00eatre plus co\u00fbteux (sauf le rhum blanc, parfois tr\u00e8s bon march\u00e9). Ils ont souvent un parfum caract\u00e9ristique, et ne conviennent pas \u00e0 toute fabrication. C'est \u00e0 vous de bien choisir, de bien marier les ar\u00f4mes. Ainsi le rhum sera id\u00e9al pour r\u00e9aliser une liqueur de vanille, tandis que le kirsch fera merveille avec des cerises dont il renforcera le parfum. Le cognac va bien avec les oranges, alors que l'armagnac s'accorde parfaitement avec les pruneaux, etc.\n\n### **_L'alcool du r\u00e9coltant_**\n\nTout r\u00e9coltant poss\u00e9dant au moins un grand jardin avec suffisamment d'arbres fruitiers (se renseigner \u00e0 la mairie), peut faire distiller sa r\u00e9colte personnelle, en franchise de droits ou non (selon qu'il jouissait d\u00e9j\u00e0 ou non de ce privil\u00e8ge en 1960). Si vous \u00eates dans ce cas, il vous faut contacter un bouilleur professionnel, aller chercher en mairie un certificat de r\u00e9coltant, puis \u00e9tablir une demande aupr\u00e8s du Service des Alcools des Douanes.\n\nAvec la franchise (pour 101 d'alcool pur), le litre d'eau-de-vie revient \u00e0 moins de 25 F; sans franchise, c'est-\u00e0-dire en payant les taxes (environ 90 F par litre d'alcool pur), ce prix est tripl\u00e9.\n\nDans des conditions bien pr\u00e9cis\u00e9es par la loi, il est possible de faire distiller \u00ab des vins, cidres ou poir\u00e9s, marcs, lies, cerises, prunes et prunelles \u00bb, c'est-\u00e0-dire soit des boissons d\u00e9j\u00e0 pr\u00eates, soit des fruits ferment\u00e9s. Pour obtenir ces derniers, il faut mettre des fruits bien m\u00fbrs, plus ou moins \u00e9cras\u00e9s, dans un f\u00fbt, avec \u00e9ventuellement un peu d'eau. Certains r\u00e9coltants ajoutent aussi un peu de sucre (une addition de 17 g de sucre par litre donnera 1% d'alcool suppl\u00e9mentaire) mais la loi fran\u00e7aise l'interdit. Pendant la fermentation, les fruits doivent \u00eatre souvent remu\u00e9s. Quand celle-ci est termin\u00e9e le r\u00e9cipient doit \u00eatre bien bouch\u00e9 pour \u00e9viter l'entr\u00e9e des mouches et la transformation en vinaigre. Certains r\u00e9coltants ajoutent aussii, selon les saisons, les diff\u00e9rents fruits produits par leur verger ou leur jardin, et obtiennent donc, apr\u00e8s distillation (en atelier public), une eau-de-vie de fruits, qu'ils font ensuite vieillir ou non.\n\nCes alcools \u00ab naturels \u00bb conviennent g\u00e9n\u00e9ralement tr\u00e8s bien pour l'\u00e9laboration de la plupart des ap\u00e9ritifs et liqueurs. Ils ont l'avantage d'\u00eatre eux aussi des produits \u00ab maison \u00bb; ils peuvent communiquer \u00e0 vos fabrications une sorte de go\u00fbt de terroir bien sypathique, et donner ainsi \u00e0 votre production une certaine unit\u00e9. En raison de leur prix de revient, ils sont tout particuli\u00e8rement int\u00e9ressants pour les r\u00e9coltants ayant droit \u00e0 la franchise des taxes.\n\nEnfin, il faut rappeler que tout ce qui concerne la fabrication, le transport, la vente ou la d\u00e9tention d'eau-de-vie est strictement r\u00e9glement\u00e9 et les fraudes s\u00e9v\u00e8rement punies.\n\n## **Le vin**\n\nLes ap\u00e9ritifs ayant g\u00e9n\u00e9ralement un taux d'alcool inf\u00e9rieur \u00e0 celui des liqueurs, beaucoup d'entre eux ne n\u00e9cessitent pas une grande quantit\u00e9 d'eau-de-vie pour leur fabrication, mais s'\u00e9laborent principalement avec du vin (leur d\u00e9nomination l\u00e9gale est d'ailleurs \u00ab ap\u00e9ritifs \u00e0 base de vin \u00bb).\n\nDans quelques rares cas de recettes tr\u00e8s d\u00e9licates, du tr\u00e8s bon vin doit \u00eatre utilis\u00e9, mais la plupart du temps, vous pourrez vous servir de vin plut\u00f4t ordinaire, car les parfums des plantes et de l'alcool ajout\u00e9s domineront nettement. Cependant, il ne faudrait pas que ce soit du mauvais vin (avec une odeur de vinaigre par exemple). Il est souvent pr\u00e9f\u00e9rable d'employer un vin assez neutre, pas trop fort en go\u00fbt et pas trop acide.\n\nUtilisez \u00ab votre vin \u00bb, si vous en faites : vos ap\u00e9ritifs seront encore plus personnalis\u00e9s. \u00c9ventuellement, achetez le vin en cubitainers, chez un producteur (bio de pr\u00e9f\u00e9rence) cela vous permettra de faire plusieurs litres d'ap\u00e9ritifs en m\u00eame temps et \u00e0 prix r\u00e9duit. Selon les recettes et votre go\u00fbt, prenez du vin rouge, du ros\u00e9 ou du blanc. S'il s'agit de vin sucr\u00e9 (blanc doux ou ros\u00e9 doux), il faudra en tenir compte lorsque vous sucrerez votre boisson. Essayez aussi de conna\u00eetre sa teneur en alcool, cela vous permettra de calculer la quantit\u00e9 d'eau-de-vie \u00e0 ajouter.\n\n## **Le sucre**\n\nLes liqueurs sont toujours sucr\u00e9es, parfois m\u00eame tr\u00e8s sucr\u00e9es. Les ap\u00e9ritifs que vous allez cr\u00e9er le seront aussi, mais g\u00e9n\u00e9ralement beaucoup moins.\n\nVous pouvez utiliser du _sucre blanc_ en morceaux, semoule ou cristallis\u00e9 : cela n'a pas d'importance. Cependant vous trouverez peut-\u00eatre plus pratique de compter des morceaux de sucre, plut\u00f4t que de peser du sucre en poudre avec une balance. Pour conna\u00eetre la masse d'une morceau, c'est facile, il suffit de diviser celle indiqu\u00e9e sur la bo\u00eete (g\u00e9n\u00e9ralement 1000 grammes) par le nombre de morceaux. Les paquets de cinq kilogrammes de sucre cristallis\u00e9 vendus pour faire des confitures sont bon march\u00e9 (mais faites attention de ne pas acheter du sucre additionn\u00e9 de substances pour faire prendre la confiture!).\n\nLes diff\u00e9rents _sucres roux_ du commerce pr\u00e9sentent un go\u00fbt particulier qui peut \u00eatre int\u00e9ressant s'il s'allie bien avec les autres ingr\u00e9dients (du sucre roux de canne avec du rhum, par exemple).\n\nLe _miel_ peut aussi servir \u00e0 sucrer. Si vous avez quelques ruches, n'h\u00e9sitez pas \u00e0 employer votre miel. Vos boissons auront vraiment un go\u00fbt \u00ab maison \u00bb. L\u00e0 encore, il faudra \u00eatre prudent et utiliser de pr\u00e9f\u00e9rence des miels au go\u00fbt peu marqu\u00e9, ou s'accordant particuli\u00e8rement bien avec les autres ingr\u00e9dients.\n\n## **Les plantes**\n\nCe sont elles qui apporteront \u00e0 vos compositions leurs principaux ar\u00f4mes et caract\u00e8res gustatifs : la liqueur de framboise sentira la framboise, le vin de noix aura go\u00fbt de noix, etc.\n\nCertaines plantes pourront \u00eatre trouv\u00e9es en herboristerie, en pharmacie, au rayon \u00ab tisane \u00bb des grandes surfaces ou chez l'\u00e9picier, mais bien souvent elles proviendront de votre jardin, votre verger, ou encore de la campagne, de la for\u00eat, etc. o\u00f9 vous serez all\u00e9 faire la cueillette. Attention, certains v\u00e9g\u00e9taux sont toxiques! Ne r\u00e9coltez que des esp\u00e8ces que vous savez parfaitement reconna\u00eetre.\n\nToutes sortes de parties de plantes s'utilisent dans l'\u00e9laboration des spiritueux, de la racine aux fruits, en passant par les tiges, les feuilles, les fleurs, etc.\n\n### **_Les racines_**\n\nAssez peu de racines entrent dans la composition des boissons qui nous int\u00e9ressent. Quelques-unes cependant sont c\u00e9l\u00e8bres; en voici cinq qu'un amateur peut utiliser.\n\nLes racines torr\u00e9fi\u00e9es de _chicor\u00e9e,_ \u00ab un tr\u00e9sor de bienfaits \u00bb, se vendent dans toutes les alimentations (en paquet de 250 ou 500 grammes). Elles apportent unie couleur fonc\u00e9e et une certaine amertume.\n\nLes racines de _gentiane,_ s\u00e9ch\u00e9es, se trouvent facilement dans le commerce, mais si vous savez bien reconna\u00eetre la grande gentiane jaune (plante de montagne), vous pouvez aussi en utiliser des racines fra\u00eeches. Leur go\u00fbt amer est tr\u00e8s caract\u00e9ristique. Les racines d' _ang\u00e9lique_ peuvent provenir de votre jardin, si vous y avez plant\u00e9 un pied de cette plante, nomm\u00e9e \u00ab ang\u00e9lique vraie \u00bb.\n\nLe _gingembre_ n'est pas v\u00e9ritablement une racine, mais un rhizome (tige souterraine). Il est tr\u00e8s aromatique et de go\u00fbt tr\u00e8s \u00e9pic\u00e9. On l'emploie frais, coup\u00e9 en morceaux, mais on peut aussi utiliser celui qui est vendu comme aromate, en poudre.\n\nEnfin, vous pourrez aussi acheter des racines s\u00e9ch\u00e9es de _r\u00e9glisse._\n\n### **_Les tiges et les \u00e9corces_**\n\nQuelques tiges vertes, fra\u00eeches peuvent servir; les p\u00e9tioles, c'est-\u00e0-dire les queues des feuilles, s'utilisent de la m\u00eame mani\u00e8re, coup\u00e9s en morceaux. Ainsi r\u00e9coltez dans votre jardin les tiges et p\u00e9tioles d' _ang\u00e9lique_ (la m\u00eame que dans le paragraphe pr\u00e9c\u00e9dent), de _c\u00e9leri_ (en branches), ou de _fenouil._\n\nLes jeunes pousses de _prunellier_ (tiges feuill\u00e9es un peu rouge\u00e2tres) qui apparaissent au mois de mai, surtout apr\u00e8s une coupe hivernale de ces arbustes, permettent de r\u00e9aliser de tr\u00e8s bons ap\u00e9ritifs. Lorsqu'il s'agit de grosses tiges ligneuses, on n'utilise que l'\u00e9corce superficielle; exemples : l'\u00e9corce de _bouleau, aux_ propri\u00e9t\u00e9s m\u00e9dicinales, mais surtout le _quinquina_ et la _cannelle,_ qu'on ach\u00e8te s\u00e9ch\u00e9s, r\u00e9duits en poudre ou non, et qui entrent dans la composition de nombreuses recettes.\n\n### **_Les feuilles_**\n\nLes feuilles doivent \u00eatre cueillies le matin, dit-on, et si on les fait s\u00e9cher, il faut que ce soit \u00e0 l'ombre. Elles s'utilisent en effet fra\u00eeches ou s\u00e8ches. Certaines se trouvent dans les magasins, corn-me le _th\u00e9_ et les diverses plantes \u00e0 tisanes, mais la plupart peuvent aussi \u00eatre cueillies fra\u00eeches, ou s'acheter \u00e0 l'\u00e9tat frais, sur les march\u00e9s par exemple.\n\nUne premi\u00e8re cat\u00e9gorie est constitu\u00e9e de plantes condimentaires ou aromatiques, que vous pouvez cultiver dans votre jardin pour la plupart. Les catalogues des maisons sp\u00e9cialis\u00e9es les proposent \u00e0 peu pr\u00e8s toutes. Froiss\u00e9es, leurs feuilles d\u00e9gagent un ar\u00f4me souvent fort et tr\u00e8s caract\u00e9ristique. Voici les principales (dans l'ordre alphab\u00e9tique).\n\n\u2014 _L'absinthe_ : plante c\u00e9l\u00e8bre et tr\u00e8s aromatique; on peut la trouver facilement chez les p\u00e9pini\u00e9ristes, bien qu'il soit d\u00e9sormais interdit de l'utiliser pour faire des liqueurs, en raison de sa toxicit\u00e9.\n\n\u2014 _L'ang\u00e9lique_ (vraie) : encore elle!\n\n\u2014 _Le basilic_ : on l'obtient, par exemple, \u00e0 partir de graines.\n\n\u2014 _L'estragon_ : se multiplie ais\u00e9ment par division des touffes.\n\n\u2014 _L'hysope_ : s'obtient comme le pr\u00e9c\u00e9dent et les deux suivantes.\n\n\u2014 _La m\u00e9lisse_ : on l'appelle \u00e9galement _citronnelle,_ car ses feuilles exhalent une odeur de citron.\n\n\u2014 _La menthe_ : plusieurs esp\u00e8ces sauvages et cultiv\u00e9es existent, la plus connue et r\u00e9put\u00e9e est la menthe poivr\u00e9e.\n\n\u2014 _Le romarin_ : en r\u00e9gion m\u00e9diterran\u00e9enne, vous irez en chercher dans la garrigue; ailleurs il faudra le planter en bonne exposition; se multiplie facilement par bouturage.\n\n\u2014 _L\u00e0 sarriette_ : on l'obtient sans difficult\u00e9 \u00e0 partir de graines.\n\n\u2014 _La sauge_ (officinale) : \u00e0 planter en bonne exposition.\n\n\u2014 _La tanaisie_ : on la trouve souvent au bord des routes.\n\n\u2014 _Le thym_ : il en existe une vari\u00e9t\u00e9 \u00e0 odeur de citron.\n\n\u2014 _La verveine_ : sous ce nom, on cultive actuellement un petit arbuste qui ne r\u00e9ussit que dans les situations chaudes (r\u00e9gion m\u00e9diterran\u00e9enne ou paliss\u00e9 contr\u00e9 un mur).\n\nAux esp\u00e8ces pr\u00e9c\u00e9dentes, tr\u00e8s classiques pour les liqueurs, on peut ajouter quelques originalit\u00e9s : le _persil,_ le _cerfeuil,_ le _laurier-sauce..._ Vous pouvez vous procurer pratiquement toutes ces plantes par simple division (par \u00e9clat) d'une touffe du jardin de votre voisin ou d'un ami, ou encore en achetant un sachet de graines, car presque toutes les plantes aromatiques se vendent sous cette forme maintenant.\n\nLa deuxi\u00e8me cat\u00e9gorie de feuilles int\u00e9ressantes est encore plus facile \u00e0 trouver. Il s'agit de feuilles ou folioles (c'est-\u00e0-dire de parties de feuilles compos\u00e9es) d'arbres ou arbustes fruitiers :\n\n\u2014 _le cassis_ : ses feuilles sont tr\u00e8s odorantes (contrairement \u00e0 celles du groseillier);\n\n\u2014 _le cerisier_ , surtout celui qui donne des fruits acidul\u00e9s (cerises aigres, anglaises, de Montmorency...);\n\n\u2014 _le noyer_ : ses folioles donnent des pr\u00e9parations tr\u00e8s parfum\u00e9es;\n\n\u2014 _le p\u00eacher_ : tr\u00e8s utilis\u00e9es, ses feuilles mac\u00e9r\u00e9es dans le vin ou l'alcool produisent une odeur agr\u00e9able de noyau de cerise;\n\n\u2014 _le prunier_ : l'ar\u00f4me produit par ses feuilles est plus discret.\n\nTroisi\u00e8me cat\u00e9gorie : les feuilles \u00e0 ramasser dans la nature. L\u00e0, de bonnes connaissance en botanique sont n\u00e9cessaires, car il est aussi possible de s'empoisonner! Outre les v\u00e9g\u00e9taux d\u00e9j\u00e0 cit\u00e9s _(menthe, romarin, tanaisie, thym),_ il est possible de r\u00e9colter dans la nature les feuilles de certaines esp\u00e8ces sauvages : _asp\u00e9rule, origan, pervenche, serpolet..._ ainsi que le _g\u00e9n\u00e9pi_ (on utilise la plante enti\u00e8re), tr\u00e8s recherch\u00e9 dans les r\u00e9gions de haute montagne.\n\nDe nombreuses plantes m\u00e9dicinales peuvent aussi compl\u00e9ter vos r\u00e9coltes et vos recettes, vous joindrez ainsi l'utile \u00e0 l'agr\u00e9able. Mais attention aux quantit\u00e9s, car bon nombre d'esp\u00e8ces m\u00e9dicinales sont toxiques \u00e0 forte dose. N'agissez qu'en connaisseur!\n\n### **_Les fleurs_**\n\nElles se cueillent et se font s\u00e9cher comme les feuilles. Souvent les livres indiquent de r\u00e9colter les sommit\u00e9s fleuries, c'est-\u00e0-dire tout le sommet de la plante qui porte des fleurs : dans ce cas un peu de tige et quelques jeunes feuilles se trouvent m\u00eal\u00e9es aux fleurs.\n\nComme pour les feuilles pr\u00e9c\u00e9dentes, ce sont les fleurs odorantes qui peuvent servir. Voici les principales.\n\n\u2014 _L'acacia_ ou plus exactement le _robinier faux-acacia :_ on cueille les grappes de fleurs blanches.\n\n\u2014 _La camomille_ : on prend les \u00ab t\u00eates \u00bb (les capitules); existe aussi en sachet comme plante \u00e0 tisane.\n\n\u2014 _Le jasmin._\n\n\u2014 _Le magnolia_ : on utilise les p\u00e9tales de fleurs blanches.\n\n\u2014 _Les \u0153illets_ : on effeuille les p\u00e9tales d'\u0153illets rouges.\n\n\u2014 _L'oranger_ : l'ar\u00f4me de ses fleurs est c\u00e9l\u00e8bre; on en trouve aussi parmi les plantes \u00e0 tisane.\n\n\u2014 _Les roses_ : il faut des p\u00e9tales tr\u00e8s parfum\u00e9s.\n\n\u2014 _Le sureau noir_ : on coupe juste en dessous des grandes ombelles de fleurs blanches.\n\n\u2014 _Le tilleul_ : comme pour les tisanes, on r\u00e9colte fleurs et bract\u00e9es.\n\n\u2014 _Les violettes_ : il faut choisir des fleurs odorantes.\n\nPour les f\u00e9rus de botanique, on peut y ajouter les fleurs de _bouillon blanc,_ de _millepertuis,_ de _marube blanc_ , d' _arnica..._\n\nEnfin, signalons deux \u00e9pices classiques provenant de fleurs : le _clou de girofle_ (bouton floral du giroflier) et le _safran_ (stigmates d'une esp\u00e8ce de crocus, r\u00e9duits en poudre). On les ach\u00e8te en petits flacons, comme les autres \u00e9pices.\n\n### **_Les fruits charnus_**\n\nIl s'agit des fruits contenant une chair, la pulpe, renfermant elle-m\u00eame un jus sucr\u00e9 et parfum\u00e9, qu'il sera g\u00e9n\u00e9ralement inutile d'extraire.\n\nVous aurez l'embarras du choix. Vous pourrez d'abord utiliser les fruits de votre verger ou de votre jardin :\n\n\u2014 les _abricots;_\n\n\u2014 les _cassis,_ toujours tr\u00e8s odorants;\n\n\u2014 les _cerises,_ surtout les vari\u00e9t\u00e9s \u00e0 fruits aigres;\n\n\u2014 les _coings;_\n\n\u2014 les _fraises;_\n\n\u2014 les _framboises,_ \u00e0 condition qu'elles soient bien parfum\u00e9es, ce qui n'est pas toujours le cas;\n\n\u2014 les _groseilles_ \u00e0 grappes ou \u00e0 maquereau;\n\n\u2014 les _noix vertes_ : on les r\u00e9colte d\u00e9but juillet, lorsqu'elles sont encore tendres;\n\n\u2014 les _p\u00eaches;_\n\n\u2014 les _poires,_ en particulier celles de la vari\u00e9t\u00e9 Williams;\n\n\u2014 les _prunes,_ surtout si elles ont beaucoup d'ar\u00f4me (mirabelles, reines-claudes...);\n\n\u2014 le _raisin_ : du muscat par exemple.\n\nVous pourrez \u00e9galement aller r\u00e9colter dans la nature toutes sortes de petits fruits sauvages souvent d\u00e9licieux :\n\n\u2014 les _arbouses_ (en r\u00e9gion m\u00e9diterran\u00e9enne seulement);\n\n\u2014 les _fraises des bois;_\n\n\u2014 les _framboises sauvages;_\n\n\u2014 les baies de _geni\u00e8vre;_\n\n\u2014 les _merises;_\n\n\u2014 les _m\u00fbres,_ fruits de ronces;\n\n\u2014 les baies de _myrte_ (en r\u00e9gion m\u00e9diterran\u00e9enne seulement);\n\n\u2014 les _myrtilles;_\n\n\u2014 les _n\u00e8fles;_\n\n\u2014 les _prunelles._\n\nVous avez encore une autre possibilit\u00e9 : acheter des fruits. Outre les fruits cultiv\u00e9s cit\u00e9s ci-dessus, vous trouverez dans le commerce, partout en France, des fruits m\u00e9diterran\u00e9ens ou exotiques tr\u00e8s int\u00e9ressants : _ananas, bananes, c\u00e9drats, citrons, fruits de la passion, kiwis, litchis, mandarines, mangues, oranges, pamplemousses,_ etc.\n\nDans tous les cas, les fruits doivent \u00eatre sains, non trait\u00e9s (surtout si vous utilisez la peau) et m\u00fbrs \u00e0 point, exhalant agr\u00e9ablement leur odeur caract\u00e9ristique.\n\nPour certaines recettes, vous n'aurez besoin que de leur jus, ou que de leur \u00e9corce (zeste), ou encore que de leur noyau; pour les autres vous utiliserez les fruits entiers, coup\u00e9s en morceaux.\n\nPour d'autres, il vous faudra des fruits s\u00e8ches : _pruneaux, raisins secs, figues, dattes..._ Les gousses de _vanille,_ tr\u00e8s int\u00e9ressantes pour leur parfum incomparable, peuvent aussi \u00eatre rang\u00e9es dans cette cat\u00e9gorie (elles subissent, en plus du s\u00e9chage, une fermentation).\n\n### **_Les graines et les fruits secs_**\n\nLes plantes de la famille des _ombellif\u00e8res_ ont de petits fruits secs nomm\u00e9s \u00ab ak\u00e8nes \u00bb, plus connus sous le nom de \u00ab graines \u00bb. Voici les plus utilis\u00e9s : _ang\u00e9lique, anis vert, coriandre, cumin, fenouil._\n\n_L'anis \u00e9toil\u00e9,_ encore appel\u00e9e _badiane,_ est une plante toute diff\u00e9rente; on en trouve facilement dans les herboristeries.\n\nLes grains de _caf\u00e9_ sont des graines torr\u00e9fi\u00e9es. On peut \u00e9galement acheter des graines (ou f\u00e8ves) de _cacao_ trait\u00e9es de la m\u00eame mani\u00e8re.\n\nLes amandes des fruits \u00e0 noyau sont aussi des graines utilisables; mais attention, certaines (celles de p\u00eache en particulier) contiennent des substances toxiques.\n\nLa partie comestible des _noix_ et _noisettes_ entre \u00e9galement dans cette cat\u00e9gorie. Ajoutons enfin la _noix de coco_ dont la partie blanche, nomm\u00e9e \u00ab coprah \u00bb, est tr\u00e8s parfum\u00e9e.\n\n# **LES TECHNIQUES**\n\nVos ingr\u00e9dients (alcool, sucre, au moins une des plantes \u00e9num\u00e9r\u00e9es pr\u00e9c\u00e9demment, et \u00e9ventuellement vin) \u00e9tant r\u00e9unis, il ne vous reste plus qu'\u00e0 vous munir de quelques r\u00e9cipients et ustensiles de cuisine, et vous pouvez commencer.\n\n## **La r\u00e9alisation d'un extrait**\n\nC'est la premi\u00e8re op\u00e9ration.\n\nIl ne s'agit pas d'obtenir ce qu'on peut trouver chez le pharmacien sous le nom d'extrait, d'essence ou d'esprit (de rose, de romarin...); la plupart de ces liquides, tr\u00e8s concentr\u00e9s, proviennent d'une distillation.\n\nVous n'aurez g\u00e9n\u00e9ralement pas non plus \u00e0 utiliser la technique de l' _infusion_ (celle du th\u00e9 ou des tisanes) ni celle de la _d\u00e9coction_ (dans ce cas on laisse bouillir l'eau et la plante).\n\nVotre technique habituelle sera la _mac\u00e9ration \u00e0 froid_ de votre plante dans l'alcool. C'est tr\u00e8s simple \u00e0 r\u00e9aliser, puisqu'il suffit de mettre \u00e0 tremper les feuilles, fleurs, fruits... dans de l'eau-de-vie. Cependant plusieurs questions se posent.\n\n### **_Quel r\u00e9cipient utiliser ?_**\n\nAvant tout il faudra que ce r\u00e9cipient soit herm\u00e9tique, car il vaut mieux ne perdre ni ar\u00f4mes ni alcool au cours de cette mac\u00e9ration. Son ouverture devra le plus souvent \u00eatre tr\u00e8s grande, afin de pouvoir ais\u00e9ment y mettre \u2014 et surtout en retirer \u2014 des feuilles ou fruits encombrants. Il est pr\u00e9f\u00e9rable que ce r\u00e9cipient soit en verre, car ce mat\u00e9riau se nettoie facilement, ne communique jamais de go\u00fbt \u00e9tranger \u00e0 la pr\u00e9paration, et par sa transparence permet aux rayons du soleil d'\u00e9chauffer un peu le contenu et au fabricant de surveiller ce qui s'y passe. Enfin il doit \u00eatre nettement plus grand (une fois et demie ou plus) que la quantit\u00e9 de liquide que vous allez y verser; cela \u00e9vitera les risques de d\u00e9bordement et permettra un remuage plus facile et plus efficace.\n\nEn r\u00e9sum\u00e9, dans la plupart des cas, un grand bocal, de 1 \u00e0 3 litres, \u00e0 fermeture efficace (couvercle \u00e0 vis ou syst\u00e8me avec caoutchouc) convient parfaitement. Si les ingr\u00e9dients ne sont que poudres et liquides, vous pourrez vous servir aussi de bouteilles ou de petites bonbonnes (avec bouchon, bien entendu).\n\n### **_Comment le remplir ?_**\n\nL'ordre dans lequel vous y mettez vos ingr\u00e9dients n'a pas d'importance. La quantit\u00e9 de plantes que vous utilisez aura par contre une grande influence sur l'intensit\u00e9 du go\u00fbt obtenu. Si vous faites mac\u00e9rer beaucoup de feuilles, \u00e9vitez quand m\u00eame qu'elles ne d\u00e9passent trop du liquide.\n\nDeux m\u00e9thodes principales existent.\n\nLa premi\u00e8re, qui est la plus simple et la plus rapide, consiste \u00e0 mettre d'abord \u00e0 mac\u00e9rer les parties de plantes uniquement dans l'alcool. Plus cet alcool est fort, plus vite se fera la dissolution des substances de la plante qui sont solubles dans l'alcool \u00e9thylique et parmi lesquelles certaines sont responsables de la saveur et de l'odeur du v\u00e9g\u00e9tal. Vous r\u00e9aliserez ainsi un v\u00e9ritable _extrait._ Pour acc\u00e9l\u00e9rer encore cette dissolution, il suffit de couper la plante en tr\u00e8s petits morceaux. Vous pouvez ainsi r\u00e9duire en poudre certaines graines comme celles de fenouil, d'anis vert... avec votre moulin \u00e0 caf\u00e9 \u00e9lectrique. Les fruits peu juteux (coings, noix vertes...) peuvent \u00eatre pass\u00e9s \u00e0 la moulinette. Cependant, on n'y gagne pas toujours : des prunelles enti\u00e8res donnent un bien meilleur r\u00e9sultat qu'une fois \u00e9cras\u00e9es.\n\nLa seconde m\u00e9thode, c'est de mettre \u00e0 mac\u00e9rer ensemble, d\u00e8s le d\u00e9but, tous les composants, dans leurs justes proportions : alcool, plantes, sucre et \u00e9ventuellement vin. En plus de l'extraction de certaines substances des plantes par l'alcool pr\u00e9sent, le sucre ajout\u00e9 devra se dissoudre, et rendra le liquide plus \u00e9pais, moins favorable aux \u00e9changes. Cette mac\u00e9ration demandera donc plus de temps et n\u00e9cessitera de plus fr\u00e9quents remuages; sa clarification sera plus lente.\n\n### **_Comment conduire la mac\u00e9ration ?_**\n\nApr\u00e8s avoir opt\u00e9 pour l'une des deux m\u00e9thodes pr\u00e9c\u00e9dentes et rempli (pas compl\u00e8tement) votre bocal, qu'allez-vous faire ?\n\nIl faut le mettre dans de bonnes conditions de temp\u00e9rature, car la chaleur acc\u00e9l\u00e8re aussi la dissolution. Mais il ne faudrait pas qu'elle soit trop forte (plus de 40\u00b0C), car elle risquerait d'entra\u00eener des d\u00e9compositions et finalement une d\u00e9naturation du produit. On recommande g\u00e9n\u00e9ralement d'exposer les bocaux de plantes \u00e0 mac\u00e9rer au soleil, en les pla\u00e7ant sur le rebord d'une fen\u00eatre expos\u00e9e au sud, \u00e0 l'int\u00e9rieur de la pi\u00e8ce (qui doit \u00eatre chauff\u00e9e, si c'est en hiver). Toutefois, pour obtenir une belle couleur verte par mac\u00e9ration de feuilles dans de l'eau-de-vie blanche il est indispensable que le bocal ne voie pas la lumi\u00e8re (la couleur verte provient de la chlorophylle contenue dans les feuilles). Il suffit alors de recouvrir votre bocal de n'importe quel mat\u00e9riau opaque, ou de l'enfermer dans un placard.\n\nVous devez remuer un peu le bocal une ou deux fois par jour, surtout si vous y avez mis du sucre, pour une dissolution plus rapide. C'est l\u00e0 que vous appr\u00e9cierez de ne pas avoir trop rempli votre r\u00e9cipient.\n\nJe vous conseille vivement d'y go\u00fbter fr\u00e9quemment, c'est le meilleur moyen de vous rendre compte o\u00f9 en est la mac\u00e9ration. Jour apr\u00e8s jour vous percevrez le go\u00fbt de la plante de plus en plus fort; \u00e9ventuellement vous pourrez ainsi d\u00e9cider de l'arr\u00eat de la mac\u00e9ration.\n\n### **_Combien de temps doit-elle durer ?_**\n\nOn ne peut pas r\u00e9pondre simplement \u00e0 cette question, car l'efficacit\u00e9 de la mac\u00e9ration ne d\u00e9pend pas seulement de la dur\u00e9e de contact entre plante et alcool; de nombreux facteurs, d\u00e9j\u00e0 \u00e9voqu\u00e9s, interviennent :\n\n\u2014 la temp\u00e9rature; \u00e0 10\u00b0C dans une cave, la mac\u00e9ration est lente; dans un bocal expos\u00e9 au soleil, elle se fait beaucoup plus vite;\n\n\u2014 la fr\u00e9quence des remuages; l'agitation acc\u00e9l\u00e8re la mise eh solution des diff\u00e9rentes substances;\n\n\u2014 la teneur en alcool de l'eau-de-vie employ\u00e9e; plus elle est \u00e9lev\u00e9e, plus la mac\u00e9ration est rapide;\n\n\u2014 la pr\u00e9sence ou non de sucre, selon la m\u00e9thode utilis\u00e9e; avec du sucre, c'est plus long;\n\n\u2014 la surface de contact entre la plante et le liquide; plus les morceaux sont petits et nombreux, mieux la mac\u00e9ration se fera; les plantes \u00ab moulin\u00e9es \u00bb ou r\u00e9duites en poudre donneront donc des r\u00e9sultats plus prompts; les feuilles et p\u00e9tales, gr\u00e2ce \u00e0 leur minceur, permettent aussi une action rapide de l'alcool; par contre, des noyaux de prune devront rester tr\u00e8s longtemps dans l'eau-de-vie;\n\n\u2014 la quantit\u00e9 de plante par rapport au volume du liquide; il est \u00e9vident que plus vous mettrez de feuilles, fleurs, graines... plus vous obtiendrez rapidement le go\u00fbt recherch\u00e9;\n\n\u2014 la nature des plantes; elle joue un grand r\u00f4le; en effet, des plantes tr\u00e8s aromatiques comme la sauge ou la tanaisie parfument l'alcool en quelques heures, tandis que des feuilles de noyer ou de prunier demanderont au moins une ou deux semaines.\n\nLes dur\u00e9es de mac\u00e9ration indiqu\u00e9es dans les recettes \u00ab toutes faites \u00bb, parfois tr\u00e8s pr\u00e9cises (exemple 44 jours), n'ont donc gu\u00e8re de valeur. Ce ne sont que des indications. En voici d'autres, pour des conditions moyennes de temp\u00e9rature, de remuages, etc.\n\n\u2014 Plantes tr\u00e8s aromatiques : 1 journ\u00e9e.\n\n\u2014 Plantes aromatiques, finement divis\u00e9es : 2 ou 3 jours.\n\n\u2014 Feuilles d'arbres peu odorantes : 1 ou 2 semaines.\n\n\u2014 \u00c9corces \u00e9paisses, racines, noyaux, fruits entiers : 1 mois o\u00f9 plus.\n\nVous compl\u00e8terez vous-m\u00eames ces donn\u00e9es par votre exp\u00e9rience. Je vous rappelle que c'est encore en go\u00fbtant r\u00e9guli\u00e8rement que vous pourrez vous faire la meilleure id\u00e9e de l'\u00e9tat d'avancement de la mac\u00e9ration.\n\n### **_Comment l'arr\u00eater ?_**\n\nPour arr\u00eater la mac\u00e9ration il suffit de s\u00e9parer les plantes du liquide, g\u00e9n\u00e9ralement \u00e0 l'aide d'une passoire, en \u00e9vitant de remuer le m\u00e9lange juste avant l'op\u00e9ration. Au cas o\u00f9 les \u00e9l\u00e9ments v\u00e9g\u00e9taux auraient \u00e9t\u00e9 r\u00e9duits en poudre tr\u00e8s fine, il faudrait un filtre (voir _Comment s\u00e9parer le liquide clair du d\u00e9p\u00f4t_).\n\nLe liquide obtenu constitue votre extrait, \u00e0 partir duquel vous pouvez faire une liqueur plus ou moins sucr\u00e9e, plus ou moins forte en alcool, ou encore un vin ap\u00e9ritif blanc ou rouge.\n\n## **Le dosage et l'assemblage**\n\nSelon la m\u00e9thode utilis\u00e9e, l'extrait que vous venez de r\u00e9aliser peut \u00eatre une liqueur pratiquement termin\u00e9e, car vous aviez mis du sucre au d\u00e9part, ou au contraire une mati\u00e8re premi\u00e8re \u00e0 laquelle vous devez ajouter maintenant au moins du sucre, \u00e9ventuellement du vin, de l'eau, et peut-\u00eatre m\u00eame un ou plusieurs autres extraits. Comment faire le m\u00e9lange ? Comment doser les diff\u00e9rents ingr\u00e9dients afin d'obtenir un go\u00fbt \u00e9quilibr\u00e9 ? C'est l'objet des pages qui suivent.\n\n### **_Comment sucrer ?_**\n\nDeux questions se posent \u00e0 propos du sucre : quelle quantit\u00e9 faut-il mettre, et comment le dissoudre ?\n\nL'analyse des diff\u00e9rentes recettes connues de liqueurs et d'ap\u00e9ritifs montre que la teneur en sucre peut \u00eatre tr\u00e8s variable. Mais il y a quand m\u00eame quelques principes g\u00e9n\u00e9raux \u00e0 respecter. Une liqueur doit avoir un go\u00fbt franchement sucr\u00e9. De plus, une forte proportion de sucre \u00e9paissira le liquide et lui donnera une consistance sirupeuse : on parlera alors de \u00ab cr\u00e8me \u00bb. A vous de faire des essais diff\u00e9rents, en notant la quantit\u00e9 de sucre ajout\u00e9 par litre, et en comparant par d\u00e9gustation les r\u00e9sultats obtenus. Voici une valeur moyenne pour les liqueurs : 300 g de sucre pour un litre d'extrait. Cependant une liqueur de cerises sera, \u00e0 mon go\u00fbt, meilleure avec moiti\u00e9 moins de sucre; une cr\u00e8me de cassis doit en contenir 400 \u00e0 500 g. Les vins ap\u00e9ritifs sont g\u00e9n\u00e9ralement moins sucr\u00e9s : 150 g de sucre par litre me semblent constituer une bonne moyenne, mais l\u00e0 encore, c'est une affaire de go\u00fbt. En outre, selon la composition, une quantit\u00e9 de sucre plus importante ou plus faible sera peut-\u00eatre n\u00e9cessaire; le go\u00fbt sucr\u00e9 doit \u00e9quilibrer les saveurs am\u00e8res et acides.\n\nPour ajouter le sucre, il faut d'abord le peser. Vous pouvez utiliser une balance de cuisine ou un verre doseur, ou encore compter des morceaux de sucre apr\u00e8s avoir calcul\u00e9 la masse d'un morceau. Ajout\u00e9 tel quel, le sucre mettra du temps \u00e0 se dissoudre, et il sera n\u00e9cessaire d'agiter le liquide plusieurs fois pour obtenir la dissolution compl\u00e8te. Cette m\u00e9thode s'utilise surtout lorsqu'on r\u00e9alise directement un extrait sucr\u00e9.\n\nIl est bien pratique de faire d'abord un _sirop,_ en ajoutant de l'eau au sucre (en poudre, cristallis\u00e9 ou en morceaux) et en faisant bouillir quelques minutes. Il faut utiliser au moins 100 g d'eau (10 cl) pour 200 g de sucre, et laisser un peu refroidir avant de m\u00e9langer \u00e0 l'extrait. Si vous sucrez avec du miel, il vaut mieux le rendre liquide en le chauffant au bain-marie avant utilisation.\n\n### **_Comment obtenir le bon degr\u00e9 d'alcool ?_**\n\nLiqueurs et ap\u00e9ritifs se distinguent assez nettement par leur teneur en alcool : les ap\u00e9ritifs \u00e0 base de vin en contiennent le plus souvent de 16 et 20%, tandis que les liqueurs sont g\u00e9n\u00e9ralement plus riches en alcool et de degr\u00e9 fort variable : environ 25% pour les moins alcoolis\u00e9es, ou 30-35% pour beaucoup, voire 40 \u00e0 55% pour certaines liqueurs fortes.\n\n17% vol. est un minimum, au-dessous duquel il y a des risques de fermentation. En effet le sucre que vous ajoutez pourrait permettre \u00e0 des levures de vivre, en le transformant en alcool (c'est la fermentation alcoolique) et en dioxyde de carbone (ou gaz carbonique) qui rendrait le liquide gazeux, ce qu'il faut absolument \u00e9viter.\n\nPour une liqueur, le \u00ab bon degr\u00e9 d'alcool \u00bb est celui qui permettra \u00e0 la plante d'exhaler au mieux son ar\u00f4me, sans que celui-ci soit \u00e9cras\u00e9 par l'odeur de l'eau-de-vie. Les liqueurs de fruits (fraises, framboises, cassis...) sont meilleures si elles sont peu alcoolis\u00e9es (20 \u00e0 30%), tandis que les feuilles tr\u00e8s aromatiques (sauge, verveine, tanaisie, g\u00e9n\u00e9pi...) demandent plus une forte teneur en alcool (40 \u00e0 55%).\n\nC'est bien s\u00fbr avec l'exp\u00e9rience, et son go\u00fbt personnel, que chacun arrive \u00e0 choisir, pour une pr\u00e9paration donn\u00e9e, le taux d'alcool qui lui semble id\u00e9al. C'est d'ailleurs l\u00e0 une des difficult\u00e9s, mais aussi un des plaisirs, du travail du liquoriste.\n\nVoici deux techniques de d\u00e9termination du degr\u00e9 d'alcool de votre liquide.\n\n1. _Avec un alcoom\u00e8tre._\n\nSi vous poss\u00e9dez un tel appareil (vendu par les opticiens, pharmaciens...), vous pourrez conna\u00eetre tr\u00e8s pr\u00e9cis\u00e9ment le degr\u00e9 alcoolique de votre eau-de-vie, ainsi que de vos extraits, \u00e0 condition qu'ils ne contiennent pas de sucre. Lorsque vous ajouterez un sirop de sucre, il faudra faire un petit calcul, car le volume de l'ensemble augmentant, le pourcentage d'alcool diminuera l\u00e9g\u00e8rement. Mais si vous ajoutez de l'eau, ou m\u00eame un peu de vin (\u00e0 condition qu'il ne soit pas sucr\u00e9), \u00e0 une eau-de-vie dans laquelle ont seulement mac\u00e9r\u00e9 des plantes, vous pouvez encore vous servir de votre alcoom\u00e8tre.\n\n2. _Sans alcoom\u00e8tre._\n\nDans ce cas il vous faut conna\u00eetre le degr\u00e9 d'alcool ainsi que le volume de chacun de vos ingr\u00e9dients de d\u00e9part : eau-de-vie et vin, mesurer le volume total de vos produits fini, et vous livrer \u00e0 un petit calcul.\n\nPour conna\u00eetre le volume d'un liquide, c'est assez facile. Il suffit, par exemple, d'en remplir des bouteilles de capacit\u00e9 connue : 1 litre, 75 cl, 33 cl, 25 cl, pour les plus courantes. Vous pouvez ainsi vous constituer un jeu de flacons \u00ab jaug\u00e9s \u00bb. Il est bien pratique aussi d'utiliser un verre doseur, pr\u00e9vu pour la cuisine.\n\nPour calculer ensuite le volume total d'alcool pur contenu dans votre boisson, vous additionnez le volume d'alcool pur de l'eau-de-vie et celui du vin. C'est tout! Mais attention aux unit\u00e9s!\n\n### **Exemple**\n\n\u2022 Vous avez fait 0,7 litre d'une liqueur de graines de fenouil avec 1\/2 litre d'eau-de-vie \u00e0 40\u00b0 (c'est-\u00e0-dire 40% en volume) et un sirop de sucre (compos\u00e9 d'eau et de sucre); il n'y a donc dans cette liqueur que :\n\n0,5 litre \u00d7 40% = 0,2 litre d'alcool pur.\n\nLe degr\u00e9 alcoolique de cette liqueur est donc \u00e9gal \u00e0 :\n\n(0,2 \u00f7 0,7) \u00d7 100 = 28,5%.\n\n\u2022 Admettons maintenant que vous vouliez ramener ce degr\u00e9 \u00e0 25, il faudra ajouter un peu d'eau, mais combien exactement ?\n\nPour obtenir une boisson \u00e0 25% contenant 0,2 litre d'alcool pur, il faut un volume total de :\n\n(0,2 \u00f7 25) \u00d7 100 = 0,8 litre.\n\nVous devez donc ajouter \u00e0 votre liqueur 0,8 - 0,7 = 0,1 litre d'eau.\n\n**Voici un exemple plus complexe**\n\n\u2022 Vous avez r\u00e9alis\u00e9 un vin ap\u00e9ritif par mac\u00e9ration de folioles de noyer dans 1 litre de vin rouge \u00e0 12% auquel vous avez ajout\u00e9 25 cl (une petite bouteille \u00e0 bi\u00e8re) d'eau-de-vie \u00e0 40%, et 150 g de sucre (sans eau). En consid\u00e9rant (car c'est, presque vrai) que la mac\u00e9ration des feuilles et l'addition de sucre n'ont pas chang\u00e9 notablement le volume du liquide, vous obtenez donc :\n\n(1 l = 100 cl)\n\n100 cl + 25 cl = 125 cl d'ap\u00e9ritif.\n\n\u2022 Quantit\u00e9 d'alcool pur contenu : (100 \u00d7 12%) + (25 \u00d7 40%) = 22 cl Degr\u00e9 alcoolique de cette boisson : (22 : 125) X 100 17,6 %. Ce degr\u00e9 est tr\u00e8s correct pour un tel ap\u00e9ritif, mais si vous vouliez le ramener \u00e0 16%, il faudrait utiliser le principe pr\u00e9c\u00e9dent pour calcu1er la quantit\u00e9 d'eau \u00e0 ajouter : pour obtenir un m\u00e9lange \u00e0 16% contenant 22 cl d'alcool pur, il faut un volume total de :\n\n(22 \u00f7 16) \u00d7 100 = 137,5 cl.\n\n\u2022 Il suffirait donc d'ajouter : 137,5 - 125 = 12,5 cl d'eau.\n\n**Remarque**\n\nIl est beaucoup plus simple de calculer comme ci-dessus un volume d'eau \u00e0 ajouter pour r\u00e9duire le degr\u00e9, qu'un volume d'eau-de-vie pour remonter la teneur en alcool. La raison en est simple : l'addition d'eau ne change que le volume total (pas le volume d'alcool pur contenu), tandis que l'ajout d'eau-de-vie modifie \u00e0 la fois le volume total et la quantit\u00e9 d'alcool pur. _Si vous n'\u00eates pas fort en math\u00e9matiques, mettez donc un peu trop d'alcool au d\u00e9part, plut\u00f4t qu'un peu moins_ ; la rectification sera plus facile.\n\n### **_Comment corriger, am\u00e9liorer, enrichir, colorer, etc. ?_**\n\nComme en cuisine, vous devez maintenant go\u00fbter, et si n\u00e9cessaire, \u00ab rectifier l'assaisonnement \u00bb. Il est encore temps d'ajouter du sucre, de l'eau et \u00e9ventuellement de l'alcool. En particulier, si vous trouvez le go\u00fbt v\u00e9g\u00e9tal beaucoup trop prononc\u00e9 (cela arrive parfois avec des feuilles tr\u00e8s aromatiques), vous pouvez toujours le diluer avec une composition semblable n'ayant pas contenu de plantes.\n\nMais surtout, vous allez pouvoir associer des parfums entre eux, de mani\u00e8re \u00e0 obtenir une liqueur ou un ap\u00e9ritif... \u00e0 votre go\u00fbt. Vous allez ainsi r\u00e9ellement cr\u00e9er un nouveau produit. Pour ce faire, le plus simple est de m\u00e9langer des compositions de m\u00eame degr\u00e9 alcoolique et de m\u00eame teneur en sucre.\n\n**Exemple** : comment obtenir une belle liqueur verte aux multiples parfums ?\n\nVous devez d'abord faire des extraits s\u00e9par\u00e9s par mac\u00e9ration de feuilles \u00e0 l'abri de la lumi\u00e8re (pour la couleur), de graines... puis les sucrer (\u00e0 300 g\/l). Le degr\u00e9 alcoolique doit \u00eatre fort (50\u00b0 environ). A ce stade, c'est-\u00e0-dire avant clarification et vieillissement, vous pouvez vous livrer au grand art du liquoriste, en assemblant, dans des proportions que vous notez, ces extraits sucr\u00e9s de diverses plantes : feuilles de verveine, de menthe, de tanaisie, d'estragon, de m\u00e9lisse, de sauge..., graines d'anis, de fenouil, d'ang\u00e9lique... Le nombre des combinaisons possibles est pratiquement infini. Selon votre go\u00fbt, vous pouvez insister davantage sur les ar\u00f4mes anis\u00e9s, menthol\u00e9s ou citronn\u00e9s. La mise au point d'une recette est passionnante et demande de nombreux essais qu'il est pr\u00e9f\u00e9rable d'\u00e9taler sur plusieurs jours, car qui dit de nombreux essais dit de nombreuses d\u00e9gustations.\n\nDans un autre r\u00e9pertoire, vous pouvez rechercher une liqueur compos\u00e9e, \u00e0 base de divers petits fruits de votre jardin : framboises, cassis, groseilles, fraises... mac\u00e9r\u00e9s dans une eau-de-vie de fruit; ou une autre, \u00e0 base de fruits exotiques : oranges, bananes, ananas... avec vanille et rhum. Bien d'autres id\u00e9es vont vous venir. Vous trouverez plusieurs de ces recettes compos\u00e9es en fin de livre.\n\nPour les ap\u00e9ritifs, c'est la m\u00eame chose : un vin aromatis\u00e9 \u00e0 l'aide de feuilles de plusieurs arbres de votre verger (p\u00eacher, cerisier, prunier, noyer) constitue un excellent ap\u00e9ritif. A vous de mettre au point une recette qui vous pla\u00eet, en notant les proportions des diverses feuilles d'une fois sur l'autre et vous pourrez proposer \u00e0 vos amis cette recette personnelle. D'autres recettes compos\u00e9es de vins aromatis\u00e9s vous sont propos\u00e9es plus loin.\n\nUne derni\u00e8re touche de couleur peut rendre votre produit encore plus attrayant. Elle n'est g\u00e9n\u00e9ralement pas n\u00e9cessaire lorsqu'on utilise comme liquide de base du vin rouge ou de l'eau-de-vie vieillie dans un f\u00fbt, car ces substances ont elles-m\u00eames une belle couleur. Il en va de m\u00eame avec des fruits tr\u00e8s color\u00e9s : framboises, prunelles, myrtilles, etc.\n\nL'obtention de la couleur verte avec des feuilles fra\u00eeches a d\u00e9j\u00e0 \u00e9t\u00e9 expliqu\u00e9e ici : c'est la chlorophylle, pigment naturel des feuilles, qui en est responsable. Cependant toutes les feuilles ne donnent pas le m\u00eame r\u00e9sultat; la tanaisie surtout, ainsi que la verveine, sont les plantes les plus colorantes.\n\nPour faire une belle liqueur jaune, le safran est id\u00e9al; il suffit d'en ajouter un peu.\n\nPour foncer une liqueur ou un vin blanc aromatis\u00e9 trop p\u00e2le, vous avez le choix : caf\u00e9, chicor\u00e9e ou caramel que vous retirez du feu juste avant qu'il ne br\u00fble. Dans tous ces cas, vous pourrez marquer sur votre \u00e9tiquette : \u00ab colorants naturels \u00bb.\n\n## **La clarification et le vieillissement**\n\nVotre liqueur ou votre ap\u00e9ritif semble termin\u00e9. Ce n'est qu'une apparence, car avec le temps, des modifications de diverses natures vont se produire dans le liquide : il pourra changer d'aspect, mais aussi de go\u00fbt. Son \u00e9volution vous surprendra peut-\u00eatre : la plupart du temps, il se bonifiera et s'\u00e9claircira tout seul, mais ce n'est pas toujours aussi simple.\n\n### **_Combien de temps attendre avant de consommer ?_**\n\nLorsqu'il s'agit d'un liquide fonc\u00e9 (vin rouge aromatis\u00e9 ou liqueur de caf\u00e9 par exemple), un \u00e9ventuel trouble ou un d\u00e9p\u00f4t important ne sont gu\u00e8re g\u00eanants car on ne les voit pas. Ces boissons peuvent donc se consommer rapidement (mais elles gagneraient \u00e0 vieillir un peu, et \u00e0 \u00eatre clarifi\u00e9es). Par contre, pour un vin blanc aromatis\u00e9, une liqueur rose, jaune ou verte, une transparence parfaite ainsi qu'une absence de d\u00e9p\u00f4t sont n\u00e9cessaires. Il faudra donc attendre un moment avant de \u00ab livrer votre produit \u00e0 la consommation \u00bb.\n\nPendant cette attente, le liquide devra \u00eatre laiss\u00e9 au repos le plus complet. Une temp\u00e9rature basse est pr\u00e9f\u00e9rable; dans une cave fra\u00eeche, c'est l'id\u00e9al. La bouteille (ou bonbonne) devra \u00eatre plac\u00e9e debout. Vous devrez surveiller de temps en temps l'\u00e9volution de l'aspect du contenu. Pour cela, il est bien pratique d'\u00e9clairer \u00e0 travers le verre du r\u00e9cipient \u00e0 l'aide d'une lampe de poche, en cherchant \u00e0 appr\u00e9cier la limpidit\u00e9 et l'\u00e9paisseur du d\u00e9p\u00f4t. C'est par cette surveillance que vous vous rendrez compte un jour que cette p\u00e9riode de clarification naturelle est bien termin\u00e9e, et que vous pourrez donc faire la mise en bouteilles d\u00e9finitive. Cette _d\u00e9cantation_ peut demander quelques jours (cas fr\u00e9quent), quelques semaines, ou parfois plusieurs mois. Les liqueurs \u00e0 base de zestes (oranges, citrons, mandarines...) ou de certains fruits trop \u00e9cras\u00e9s (prunelles, geni\u00e8vre...) sont particuli\u00e8rement longues \u00e0 \u00e9claircir. Les vins auxquels on a ajout\u00e9 des substances riches en tanins (\u00e9corces de quinquina, noix, etc.) d\u00e9posent \u00e9galement tr\u00e8s longtemps.\n\n### **_Comment s\u00e9parer le liquide clair du d\u00e9p\u00f4t ?_**\n\nLa solution la plus simple consiste \u00e0 verser doucement le liquide bien d\u00e9cant\u00e9, dans un autre r\u00e9cipient, en s'arr\u00eatant juste lorsque le d\u00e9p\u00f4t se pr\u00e9sente (voir sch\u00e9ma 1, m\u00eame page).\n\nUne solution plus efficace n\u00e9cessite l'emploi d'un tuyau souple : c'est la m\u00e9thode du _soutirage_ se-Ion le principe du _siphon_ (sch\u00e9ma 2, m\u00eame page). Un tuyau en mati\u00e8re plastique transparente, comme on peut en acheter (au m\u00e8tre) chez divers commer\u00e7ants de pi\u00e8ces d\u00e9tach\u00e9es, fait tr\u00e8s bien l'affaire, \u00e0 condition qu'il ne soit pas trop gros (un diam\u00e8tre int\u00e9rieur de 3 \u00e0 5 mm est id\u00e9al). Vous pourrez acc\u00e9l\u00e9rer ou ralentir l'\u00e9coulement du liquide clair en abaissant ou \u00e9levant la bouteille qui le re\u00e7oit.\n\nLe liquide restant sera moins abondant avec cette m\u00e9thode qu'avec la pr\u00e9c\u00e9dente. Autre avantage : il arrive qu'il se forme en plus du d\u00e9p\u00f4t, une sorte d'\u00e9cume de surface provenant d'essences v\u00e9g\u00e9tales peu denses (c'est le cas avec les zestes); avec votre tuyau, il sera ais\u00e9 de soutirer le liquide limpide compris entre les deux zones d'impuret\u00e9s.\n\nPour ne pas perdre le liquide restant, contenant le d\u00e9p\u00f4t, vous pouvez le laisser d\u00e9canter \u00e0 nouveau, et recommencer la m\u00eame op\u00e9ration. Vous pouvez aussi tenter de le filtrer; le r\u00e9sultat n'est pas garanti, mais cela r\u00e9ussit assez souvent. Les filtres \u00e0 caf\u00e9, en papier, retiennent bien les impuret\u00e9s. Toutefois ces derni\u00e8res sont parfois si fines qu'elles bouchent rapidement tous les pores du filtre, ce qui emp\u00eache tout liquide de passer. Le m\u00eame probl\u00e8me se produit avec des liqueurs tr\u00e8s sucr\u00e9es. Un autre filtre, aux pores plus grands, peut alors \u00eatre utilis\u00e9 : un disque en coton pr\u00e9vu pour filtrer le lait (on en trouve dans toutes les coop\u00e9ratives agricoles des r\u00e9gions d'\u00e9levage laitier); il suffit de plier ce filtre de mani\u00e8re \u00e0 former un c\u00f4ne, qu'on place dans un entonnoir (sch\u00e9ma 3). Lorsque vous pratiquez de telles filtrations, ne soyez pas surpris de devoir laisser le liquide passer goutte \u00e0 goutte pendant une nuit.\n\n### **_Comment mettre en bouteilles et faire vieillir ?_**\n\nLa mise en bouteilles de liqueurs et d'ap\u00e9ritifs n'est pas d\u00e9licate comme celle du vin, car la teneur en alcool sup\u00e9rieure \u00e0 17% \u00e9vite tout risque de fermentation; c'est l'alcool qui prot\u00e8ge le liquide, en emp\u00eachant le d\u00e9veloppement intempestif des levures ou des bact\u00e9ries. Ces boissons ne craignent gu\u00e8re non plus la pr\u00e9sence d'oxyg\u00e8ne; pour les vins ap\u00e9ritifs, cette pr\u00e9sence peut m\u00eame parfois favoriser une bonne \u00e9volution.\n\nIl n'est pas indispensable d'enfoncer compl\u00e8tement les bouchons, ni de coucher les bouteilles. Une conservation au frais et \u00e0 l'abri de la lumi\u00e8re est souhaitable pour les liqueurs. Si vous aimez le go\u00fbt particulier que prennent les vieux vins doux naturels, vos vins aromatis\u00e9s pourront alors \u00eatre plac\u00e9s dans une pi\u00e8ce assez chaude (voire expos\u00e9s au soleil, comme on le fait pour certains banyuls).\n\nLa plupart de vos fabrications gagneront \u00e0 vieillir, mais les liqueurs de fruits (framboises, cassis, fraises...) perdent assez vite leurs parfums et sont meilleures jeunes.\n\nIl n'est pas impossible qu'apr\u00e8s une longue conservation en bouteilles vous constatiez la pr\u00e9sence d'un nouveau d\u00e9p\u00f4t et que vous soyez oblig\u00e9 de l'\u00e9liminer; mais ce n'est plus un probl\u00e8me pour vous : vous connaissez les techniques \u00e0 employer. Au cours du vieillissement, des r\u00e9actions se produisent en effet entre les diff\u00e9rentes substances contenues, ce qui peut entra\u00eener la formation de nouvelles impuret\u00e9s, mais qui va aussi progressivement modifier le go\u00fbt de la boisson. Pour un type donn\u00e9 de liqueur ou d'ap\u00e9ritif, l'exp\u00e9rience vous apprendra combien de temps le faire vieillir, dans vos conditions habituelles, pour qu'il soit parfaitement \u00e0 votre go\u00fbt.\n\nPensez enfin aux \u00e9tiquettes. Elles vous seront indispensables pour reconna\u00eetre vos diverses r\u00e9alisations. Elles devront comporter le nom du spiritueux contenu, et \u00e9ventuellement la date de fabrication, la composition pr\u00e9cise, vos nom et adresse, etc. Soignez l'esth\u00e9tique de vos \u00e9tiquettes, si vous d\u00e9sirez offrir quelques bouteilles \u00e0 vos amis. Vous pouvez m\u00eame faire un petit montage avec une photo de votre maison, que vous multipliez ensuite par photocopie; une telle \u00e9tiquette conviendra parfaitement pour vos produits \u00ab maison \u00bb.\n\n# **LES DIFF\u00c9RENTS AP\u00c9RITIFS**\n\nCe qu'on appelle ap\u00e9ritif actuellement, c'est une boisson que l'on prend juste avant le d\u00e9jeuner ou le d\u00eener, pour se \u00ab mettre en app\u00e9tit \u00bb. Tous les ap\u00e9ritifs n'ont cependant pas des vertus \u00ab ap\u00e9ritives \u00bb, selon le sens plus ancien du mot : qui stimule l'app\u00e9tit et facilite l'ingestion du repas. La tendance actuelle \u00e0 boire des alcools forts (whisky) en guise d'ap\u00e9ritif n'est sans doute pas l'id\u00e9al sur le plan physiologique.\n\n## **Les vins aromatis\u00e9s**\n\nCe sont les plus simples \u00e0 obtenir. On les appelle aussi _vermouths_ et _quinquinas,_ mais ces mots s'utilisent de moins en moins. Un _vermouth_ du commerce est un vin blanc (il doit y en avoir 80%) aromatis\u00e9 \u00e0 l'aide de plantes (dont des armoises), sucr\u00e9, alcoolis\u00e9 et \u00e9ventuellement color\u00e9 avec du caramel. Ex. : le Martini. Un _quinquina,_ c'est un peu la m\u00eame chose, avec de l'\u00e9corce de quinquina dans la liste des plantes, et des mistelles (voir _Les vins de liqueur_) en plus du vin. Ex. : le Saint-Rapha\u00ebl.\n\nLe but de ce livre n'est pas de chercher \u00e0 reproduire ou imiter ces ap\u00e9ritifs connus, mais plut\u00f4t de faire d'autres vins aromatis\u00e9s, avec les ingr\u00e9dients dont vous disposez, et qui seront tout aussi agr\u00e9ables \u00e0 boire en ap\u00e9ritifs.\n\nPour vos fabrications, je vous propose trois niveaux de complexit\u00e9 : les vins aromatis\u00e9s \u00e0 l'aide d'une seule plante (\u00ab recettes simples \u00bb), les m\u00eames auxquels vous ajoutez un ou plusieurs aromates en petites quantit\u00e9s, et enfin des associations de plusieurs plantes (\u00ab recettes compos\u00e9es \u00bb).\n\n### **_Les recettes simples_**\n\n_Recette g\u00e9n\u00e9rale_\n\n(voir aussi sch\u00e9ma)\n\nOn pratique une mac\u00e9ration de plantes soit directement dans du vin additionn\u00e9 d'alcool et de sucre, soit dans de l'alcool seul; dans ce dernier cas, on m\u00e9lange ensuite l'extrait obtenu \u00e0 du vin additionn\u00e9 de sucre. (Pour plus de renseignements g\u00e9n\u00e9raux sur ces m\u00e9thodes de mac\u00e9ration revoyez les techniques.) Le degr\u00e9 final d'alcool doit \u00eatre de l'ordre de 17%, la teneur en sucre, plus ou moins 150 g\/l selon le go\u00fbt.\n\n_Recette-type_  \n**Vin aromatis\u00e9 aux feuilles de p\u00eacher**\n\nDans un grand bocal, mettez 80 feuilles de p\u00eacher cueillies le matin, un litre de vin rouge \u00e0 12%, 20 cl (environ un verre et demi) d'eau-de-vie \u00e0 40\u00b0 et 150 g de sucre. Laissez mac\u00e9rer une semaine pr\u00e8s d'une fen\u00eatre. Passez. Mettez en bouteilles. Si possible, attendez quelques semaines avant de consommer.\n\nDe la m\u00eame mani\u00e8re, et en suivant tous les conseils techniques des pages pr\u00e9c\u00e9dentes, vous pouvez r\u00e9aliser les recettes simples suivantes. Les aromates compl\u00e9mentaires sont facultatifs, et \u00e0 ajouter en petites quantit\u00e9, un peu comme un assaisonnement... selon votre go\u00fbt.\n\n#### **_Vins aromatis\u00e9s aux feuilles..._**\n\n**... d'absinthe**\n\nLa fabrication d'une liqueur aromatis\u00e9e avec cette plante \u00e9tant d\u00e9sormais interdite en France (pas en Espagne), ce vin doit l'\u00eatre \u00e9galement. Recette ancienne, \u00e0 consid\u00e9rer plut\u00f4t comme une curiosit\u00e9.\n\n**... d'asp\u00e9rule**\n\nSi vous connaissez l'asp\u00e9rule odorante qui pousse dans les h\u00eatraies, vous pouvez l'utiliser pour aromatiser agr\u00e9ablement du vin blanc.\n\n**... de basilic**\n\n**... de cassis**\n\nLe go\u00fbt rappelle celui des fruits du m\u00eame nom.\n\n**... de cerisier**\n\nChoisissez de pr\u00e9f\u00e9rence un cerisier aigre, et comme alcool du kirsch.\n\n**... de m\u00e9lisse**\n\nCela donne un vin sp\u00e9cial, au go\u00fbt citronn\u00e9.\n\n**... de menthe**\n\nIl ne faut pas mettre trop de feuilles... et aimer la menthe.\n\n**... de noyer**\n\nTr\u00e8s bon ap\u00e9ritif, de couleur fonc\u00e9e (\u00e0 cause du tanin contenu dans les feuilles), et d'un parfum particulier, bien agr\u00e9able. De nombreuses versions de cette recette existent, avec addition d'aromates compl\u00e9mentaires : muscade, vanille, clou de girofle, zestes.\n\n**... de pervenche**\n\n**... de prunellier**\n\nUtilisez les jeunes tiges feuill\u00e9es (compl\u00e8tes), qui font 10 \u00e0 15 cm de longueur et qui poussent en mai. Il en faut beaucoup. Le go\u00fbt obtenu rappelle un peu le noyau de cerise. C'est une tr\u00e8s bonne recette.\n\n**... de prunier**\n\nAvec de l'eau-de-vie de prunes, si possible, et de jeunes feuilles.\n\n**... de romarin  \n... de sarriette  \n... de sauge**\n\nLes feuilles des arbres fruitiers ci-dessus sont le plus souvent mises \u00e0 mac\u00e9rer dans du vin rouge, celles des plantes aromatiques dans du vin blanc, mais vous pouvez aussi faire l'inverse, avec succ\u00e8s.\n\n#### **_Autres vins aromatis\u00e9s..._**\n\nOutre des feuilles, vous pouvez utiliser toutes sortes d'autres parties de plantes pour aromatiser des vins. Comme dans la recette-type pr\u00e9c\u00e9dente, de l'eau-de-vie et du sucre, dans les m\u00eames proportions, sont n\u00e9cessaires pour la conservation et l'\u00e9quilibre du go\u00fbt.\n\nLes recettes suivantes sont rang\u00e9es dans l'ordre alphab\u00e9tique des noms de plantes.\n\n**... aux tiges ou aux racines d'ang\u00e9lique**\n\n**... \u00e0 l'\u00e9corce de bouleau**\n\nAvec l'\u00e9corce de jeunes branches. C'est plut\u00f4t un vin m\u00e9dicinal diur\u00e9tique.\n\n**... aux fleurs de camomille**\n\nAromates compl\u00e9mentaires : vanille, gentiane, zestes d'orange ou de citron.\n\n**... aux baies de cassis**\n\nIl faut \u00e9craser les fruits, puis passer dans un torchon \u00e0 confiture apr\u00e8s mac\u00e9ration. Une filtration sera ensuite n\u00e9cessaire.\n\n**... aux racines torr\u00e9fi\u00e9es de chicor\u00e9e**\n\nAvec 3 ou 4 c \u00e0 s. de chicor\u00e9e. Aromates compl\u00e9mentaires : vanille, zeste d'orange ou de citron.\n\n**... aux graines de fenouil**\n\nUtilisez de pr\u00e9f\u00e9rence du vin blanc. Il faut 150 g de graines \u00e9cras\u00e9es et 8 jours de mac\u00e9ration.\n\n**... aux framboises**\n\nAvec du vin blanc, c'est magnifique et d\u00e9licieux.\n\n**... aux baies de geni\u00e8vre**\n\n**... aux racines de gentiane**\n\nVoil\u00e0 un ap\u00e9ritif au go\u00fbt amer, pour ceux qui en recherchent.\n\n**... aux fleurs de marrube blanc**\n\n**... aux noix vertes**\n\nExcellent ap\u00e9ritif, \u00e0 r\u00e9aliser avec des noix cueillies d\u00e9but juillet, faciles \u00e0 couper en morceaux. Se-Ion les diff\u00e9rentes recettes connues, le nombre de noix \u00e0 utiliser varie de 4 \u00e0 25 par litre! Choisissez! Aromates compl\u00e9mentaires : orange (avec le zeste), gentiane.\n\n**... aux \u00e9corces d'oranges**\n\nSe fait avec le zeste d'oranges ordinaires (non trait\u00e9es) ou celui d'oranges am\u00e8res, qu'on ach\u00e8te, sec, chez un pharmacien par exemple.\n\n**... au zeste de pamplemousse**\n\n**... aux pruneaux**\n\nIl en faut 200 \u00e0 250 g. Ap\u00e9ritif \u00e0 r\u00e9aliser de pr\u00e9f\u00e9rence avec de l'armagnac.\n\n**... \u00e0 l'\u00e9corce de quinquina**\n\nAp\u00e9ritif tr\u00e8s amer (sauf si on met tr\u00e8s peu de quinquina) pouvant surtout servir \u00e0 ajouter de l'amertume \u00e0 d'autres boissons.\n\n**... aux fleurs de sureau noir**\n\nCette recette, faite avec du vin blanc, est g\u00e9n\u00e9ralement donn\u00e9e comme une bonne imitation de muscat (vin doux naturel).\n\nToutes les recettes cit\u00e9es ci-dessus sont bien connues, mais il n'est pas interdit d'en imaginer d'autres, en puisant dans la liste des plantes. Vous pouvez ainsi essayer un vin aromatis\u00e9 avec des feuilles de laurier, ou avec des fraises, ou encore avec de l'anis, etc.\n\n**Sch\u00e9ma g\u00e9n\u00e9ral de l'\u00e9laboration d'un vin aromatis\u00e9**\n\n### **_Les recettes compos\u00e9es_**\n\nIl s'agit cette fois d'assembler plusieurs plantes dans un m\u00eame vin. Cet assemblage peut se r\u00e9aliser de diverses fa\u00e7ons, soit en m\u00e9langeant des extraits dans l'alcool (comme expliqu\u00e9 ici), soit en m\u00ealant des vins finis, soit encore en mettant \u00e0 mac\u00e9rer ensemble les divers ingr\u00e9dients de la recette. Les deux premi\u00e8res m\u00e9thodes conviennent parfaitement pour la recherche d'une recette \u00e0 son go\u00fbt, la troisi\u00e8me s'applique plut\u00f4t aux recettes d\u00e9j\u00e0 bien \u00e9tablies.\n\nVoici quelques exemples classiques et quelques id\u00e9es in\u00e9dites.\n\n#### **Vin amer**\n\nDe nombreuses recettes existent. Elles sont toutes \u00e0 base de quinquina, de gentiane et d'\u00e9corces d'oranges am\u00e8res, en proportions variables. A vous de mettre au point la v\u00f4tre... \u00ab \u00e0 votre go\u00fbt \u00bb. Le vin obtenu pourra aussi vous servir \u00e0 l'\u00e9laboration de certains cocktails.\n\n#### **Vin aux \u00e9pices**\n\nPour un litre de vin, blanc ou rouge, additionn\u00e9 d'alcool (pour faire 17%) et de sucre (environ 100 g) : 15 g de muscade, 4 g de cannelle, quelques clous de girofle, 5 g de vanille. Ces quantit\u00e9s peuvent \u00eatre modifi\u00e9es, et d'autres \u00e9pices ajout\u00e9es.\n\n#### **Vin aux feuilles du verger**\n\nCueillez des feuilles de p\u00eacher, cerisier, noyer, prunier, cassis; ajoutez le sucre, l'eau-de-vie et le vin, et laissez mac\u00e9rer 8 jours. Selon vos pr\u00e9f\u00e9rences, vous pourrez obtenir un go\u00fbt dominant ou non, en faisant varier les proportions des diff\u00e9rentes feuilles.\n\n#### **Vin aux fruits exotiques**\n\nC'est presque une sangria. La diff\u00e9rence, c'est que vous enl\u00e8verez les morceaux de fruits pour la mise en bouteilles. Selon votre go\u00fbt, utilisez oranges, bananes, ananas, mangues, kiwis, litchis... Pour l'alcool, le rhum blanc ou le kirsch conviennent particuli\u00e8rement bien.\n\n#### **Vin aux fruits rouges**\n\nLorsque votre jardin regorge de fraises, cerises et groseilles, n'h\u00e9sitez pas \u00e0 r\u00e9aliser cet excellent ap\u00e9ritif maison. Vous pouvez y ajouter un peu de quinquina ou d'orange am\u00e8re.\n\n#### **Vin aux fruits secs**\n\nUn savant m\u00e9lange de figues, dattes, raisins secs, pruneaux, abricots secs... selon votre go\u00fbt et vos possibilit\u00e9s, vous donneront un ap\u00e9ritif original.\n\n## **Les alcools aromatis\u00e9s**\n\nLa base est une eau-de-vie blanche et forte. On y fait mac\u00e9rer des plantes, puis on sucre, et \u00e9ventuellement on ajoute de l'eau pour r\u00e9duire la teneur en alcool, \u00e0 moins que cette derni\u00e8re op\u00e9ration ne soit faite qu'au moment de servir, dans le verre. En voici quatre exemples bien connus.\n\n#### **Guignolet**\n\nC'est une liqueur de cerises (de guignes ou de griottes). Elle est obtenue apr\u00e8s plusieurs semaines de mac\u00e9ration des fruits l\u00e9g\u00e8rement \u00e9cras\u00e9s et encore pourvus de leur p\u00e9doncule (queue), dans de l'alcool neutre (ou mieux dans du kirsch). Elle est ramen\u00e9e \u00e0 16\/18% avec de l'eau, et sucr\u00e9e comme un ap\u00e9ritif (100 \u00e0 150 g de sucre\/litre).\n\n#### **Pastis**\n\nEn faisant mac\u00e9rer une bonne quantit\u00e9 d'anis \u00e9toil\u00e9 (ou badiane) et un peu de racine de r\u00e9glisse dans de l'alcool que vous ramenez ensuite \u00e0 45% environ et que vous sucrez un peu, vous obtenez une assez bonne imitation de pastis.\n\n#### **Liqueur de gentiane**\n\nLaissez mac\u00e9rer plusieurs semaines des morceaux de racines de grande gentiane dans de l'alcool fort; puis, pour imiter la Suze, ramenez \u00e0 16% avec de l'eau et dissolvez 200 g de sucre par litre. Remarque : la Suze contient en plus de l'esprit de gentiane et divers extraits aromatiques; ce que vous obtiendrez s'en rapprochera mais n'en aura pas exactement le go\u00fbt.\n\n#### **Bitter ou amer**\n\nOn donne ces noms \u00e0 des liqueurs de go\u00fbt tr\u00e8s amer, qu'on peut boire en ap\u00e9ritif, allong\u00e9es d'eau gazeuse, et qui entrent dans la composition de nombreux cocktails. La liqueur de gentiane propos\u00e9e ci-dessus est un exemple de bitter. Vous en obtiendrez \u00e9galement par mac\u00e9ration de zestes d'oranges, de citrons et surtout d'oranges am\u00e8res, ou encore en utilisant des \u00e9corces de quinquina. Vous pouvez d'ailleurs m\u00e9langer plusieurs de ces ingr\u00e9dients : un sachet de racines s\u00e9ch\u00e9es de gentiane, des \u00e9corces d'oranges am\u00e8res et un peu de quinquina dans un grand bocal d'eau-de-vie. Vous pourrez alors soutirer au fur et \u00e0 mesure de vos besoins et remplacer par le m\u00eame volume d'eau-de-vie. Pour consommer, il faudra r\u00e9duire le degr\u00e9 \u00e0 votre convenance, et sucrer l\u00e9g\u00e8rement.\n\n## **Les vins de liqueur**\n\nCe sont des ap\u00e9ritifs tr\u00e8s c\u00e9l\u00e8bres, obtenus par adjonction d'alcool au jus de raisin non ferment\u00e9 (exemple : pineau des Charentes), ou en cours (voire en fin) de fermentation (exemples : porto, mad\u00e8re, vins doux naturels...). Ils titrent, selon la loi fran\u00e7aise, entre 15 et 2%\u00b0 d'alcool.\n\n### **_Les mistelles_**\n\nC'est le nom donn\u00e9 aux vins de liqueur obtenus sans fermentation, en ajoutant de l'eau-de-vie \u00e0 du mo\u00fbt de raisin, c'est-\u00e0-dire du jus n'ayant pas encore commenc\u00e9 \u00e0 fermenter. C'est le sucre naturel du jus de raisin qui donne le go\u00fbt sucr\u00e9; l'alcool emp\u00eache le d\u00e9part de la fermentation (il doit donc y en avoir au moins 17% en volume).\n\nDans le commerce, outre le pineau des Charentes (\u00e9labor\u00e9 avec du cognac), on peut trouver deux autres mistelles : floc de Gascogne (avec de l'armagnac) et ratafia de Champagne. Traditionnellement dans les campagnes, on fait encore des mistelles; on les appelle \u00ab carthag\u00e8ne \u00bb dans le Midi, \u00ab riquiqui \u00bb en Bourgogne, etc.\n\nL'\u00e9laboration d'une mistelle est assez simple : on assemble du jus de raisin avec de l'eau-de-vie de vin d'un an (ou plus), de telle sorte que le m\u00e9lange titre 18 \u00e0 20\u00b0 d'alcool. Puis on laisse vieillir quelques ann\u00e9es en f\u00fbt de ch\u00eane. Pour un amateur, le vieillissement en f\u00fbt peut \u00eatre remplac\u00e9 par l'utilisation d'un alcool d\u00e9j\u00e0 vieilli en tonneau : cognac, armagnac... mais cela revient cher, car il faut presque autant de cognac... que de jus de raisin! Autre solution : faire vieillir dans une bonbonne contenant des copeaux de ch\u00eane (c'est efficace et tout \u00e0 fait naturel).\n\nM\u00eame avec une vieille eau-de-vie, il faut attendre au minimum deux ou trois mois que le m\u00e9lange s'\u00e9claircisse, pour pouvoir soutirer le liquide clarifi\u00e9, et commencer \u00e0 consommer.\n\nVoici deux exemples de recettes.\n\n#### **Pineau maison**\n\nDans un tonnelet (ou une bonbonne garnie de copeaux de ch\u00eane), versez 1\/3 d'eau-de-vie de vin \u00e0 60%, et compl\u00e9tez avec du mo\u00fbt de raisin bien m\u00fbr (peu acide). Laissez vieillir. Vous pouvez commencer \u00e0 en prendre (en soutirant avec un tuyau) au bout de quelques mois, et laisser le reste se bonifier en vieillissant.\n\n#### **Carthag\u00e8ne**\n\nRemplissez un petit f\u00fbt avec de l'eau de vie la plus forte possibleet du mo\u00fbt de raisin tr\u00e8s sucr\u00e9 (grenache de pr\u00e9f\u00e9rence) de telle sorte que le m\u00e9lange contienne au moins 16% d'alcool pur. Soutirez l'ann\u00e9e suivante.\n\nBien qu'il ne s'agisse pas d'une v\u00e9ritable mistelle, le _pommeau_ (commercialis\u00e9 en Normandie) trouve tout naturellement sa place ici. C'est en effet un excellent ap\u00e9ritif obtenu en assemblant de l'eau-de-vie de cidre (du calvados par exemple), et du jus de pomme bien sucr\u00e9, celui qui s'\u00e9coule en premier du pressoir lorsqu'on fait le cidre. Les principes \u00e0 respecter sont les m\u00eames que pr\u00e9c\u00e9demment :\n\n\u2014 utiliser de l'eau-de-vie d'au moins un an;\n\n\u2014 obtenir un m\u00e9lange \u00e0 18\/20%;\n\n\u2014 laisser vieillir au contact du bois de ch\u00eane;\n\n\u2014 soutirer apr\u00e8s clarification.\n\nOn peut imaginer et r\u00e9aliser d'autres ap\u00e9ritifs en suivant ces m\u00eames principes, selon l'eau-de-vie disponible :\n\n\u2014 eau-de-vie de prune et jus de prunes bien m\u00fbres;\n\n\u2014 kirsch et jus de cerise;\n\n\u2014 eau-de-vie de poire et jus de poire, etc.\n\n### **_Les vins doux naturels_**\n\nIls sont difficiles \u00e0 obtenir pour un amateur, car il faut bien ma\u00eetriser les probl\u00e8mes de fermentation (voir le livre _Faites votre vin,_ dans lequel une technique est propos\u00e9e pour \u00e9laborer ce type de vin). Il est cependant possible et assez facile d'en faire de bonnes imitations.\n\nLa plupart des recettes permettant d'imiter ces vins sont en fait des recettes de vins aromatis\u00e9s (exemple : une poign\u00e9e de fleurs de sureau s\u00e9ch\u00e9es dans du vin blanc sucr\u00e9 et renforc\u00e9 \u00e0 l'alcool donne une imitation de muscat).\n\nLa technique suivante est beaucoup plus proche de l'\u00e9laboration de certains vins doux naturels, comme le banyuls. Dans une bonbonne de verre de 15 litres, vous mettez 9 litres de vin rouge \u00e0 12% ayant une faible acidit\u00e9 (du grenache serait l'id\u00e9al, mais c'est possible avec d'autres vins), vous ajoutez 900 grammes de sucre (ou un peu plus, ou un peu moins, selon votre go\u00fbt) et 1 l d'eau-de-vie de vin \u00e0 50\u00b0), ce qui vous donne un m\u00e9lange \u00e0 16%. Vous laissez cette bonbonne remplie aux 2\/3 et bouch\u00e9e, dehors, expos\u00e9e au soleil et soumise aux variations de temp\u00e9rature. Au bout de quelques mois, d\u00e9bouchez et sentez : une forte et agr\u00e9able odeur de vin doux naturel se d\u00e9gage. Il ne vous restera plus qu'\u00e0 clarifier le liquide par deux ou trois soutirages alternant avec des p\u00e9riodes de repos en cave.\n\n# **LES DIVERSES LIQUEURS**\n\nDans ce chapitre, il ne sera question que des liqueurs prises habituellement en digestifs. Certaines peuvent aussi \u00eatre utilis\u00e9es en cuisine, pour parfumer des g\u00e2teaux par exemple, ou servir \u00e0 l'\u00e9laboration du cocktails. Il en existe deux cat\u00e9gories, selon leur mode de fabrication : par mac\u00e9ration de plantes dans l'alcool (on peut alors les appeler \u00ab ratafias \u00bb), et par assemblage d'extraits aromatiques obtenus par distillation. Ce dernier mode est le plus utilis\u00e9 par les professionnels; nous nous contenterons du premier, qui donne lui aussi d'excellents r\u00e9sultats.\n\nLe classement des liqueurs d\u00e9crites ici est bas\u00e9 sur la nature des parties de plantes utilis\u00e9es. Pour chaque exemple, la mani\u00e8re de se procurer les ingr\u00e9dients, et la fa\u00e7on exacte de proc\u00e9der ne sont pas r\u00e9p\u00e9t\u00e9es : reportez-vous aux deux premiers chapitres. N'h\u00e9sitez pas non plus \u00e0 vous servir de l'index : un m\u00eame nom de plante pourra vous renvoyer aux pages o\u00f9 vous apprendrez comment vous procurer la plante, comment l'employer pour \u00e9laborer un ap\u00e9ritif et une liqueur.\n\n## **Les liqueurs de fruits charnus**\n\nCe sont souvent celles des premiers essais, r\u00e9alis\u00e9es avec les exc\u00e9dents du jardin : framboises, fraises, cassis... Ces liqueurs ne posent gu\u00e8re de probl\u00e8mes particuliers et le r\u00e9sultat est la plupart du temps tr\u00e8s r\u00e9ussi. Toutefois il faut tenir compte du volume du jus des fruits, ainsi que de la quantit\u00e9 de sucre qu'ils apportent, pour obtenir le degr\u00e9 d'alcool et la teneur en sucre recherch\u00e9s, et ce n'est pas toujours tr\u00e8s simple. Mais rassurez-vous, m\u00eame sans calculs, et avec un peu d'exp\u00e9rience, vous confectionnerez avec ces fruits de d\u00e9licieuses liqueurs aux jolies couleurs.\n\n### **_Les recettes simples_**\n\nCe sont celles r\u00e9alis\u00e9es avec une seule vari\u00e9t\u00e9 de fruits charnus.\n\n_Recette g\u00e9n\u00e9rale_ (voir aussi sch\u00e9ma p. 35)\n\nLes fruits sont choisis bien m\u00fbrs, mais pas trop. La dur\u00e9e de la mac\u00e9ration doit \u00eatre importante : plusieurs semaines ou m\u00eame, quelques mois (si vous avez la patience d'attendre!). Le degr\u00e9 d'alcool final peut varier de 16\u00b0 \u00e0 35\u00b0. Le nom de \u00ab cr\u00e8me \u00bb d\u00e9signe une liqueur \u00e0 consistance sirupeuse en raison de sa forte teneur en sucre (400 \u00e0 500 g\/l); la proportion en sucre des autres liqueurs de fruits est souvent de l'ordre de 250-300 g\/l, mais vous pouvez aussi les pr\u00e9f\u00e9rer moins sucr\u00e9es.\n\n_Recette-type :_  \n**Liqueur de framboise**\n\nDans un bocal en verre, mettez 1 kg de framboises et 21 d'eau-de-vie. Laissez mac\u00e9rer (si possible au soleil) pendant un mois. Passez au tamis : un premier jus, bien clair, s'\u00e9coule. Pressez les framboises dans un torchon \u00e0 confiture et filtrez le jus obtenu avant de le m\u00e9langer au pr\u00e9c\u00e9dent. Sucrer \u00e0 l'aide d'un sirop compos\u00e9 de 500 g de sucre et d'1\/4 l d'eau port\u00e9s quelques minutes \u00e0 \u00e9bullition. Filtrez l'ensemble au bout d'une semaine ou deux, et mettez en bouteilles. (Remarque : il existe bien d'autres recettes possibles de liqueur de framboise.)\n\n**Sch\u00e9ma g\u00e9n\u00e9ral de l'\u00e9laboration d'une liqueur**\n\nEn proc\u00e9dant de la m\u00eame fa\u00e7on, ou d'une mani\u00e8re un peu diff\u00e9rente (voir les diverses techniques possibles dans la deuxi\u00e8me partie), vous pouvez r\u00e9aliser, \u00e0 votre go\u00fbt (selon la nature et le degr\u00e9 de l'alcool utilis\u00e9, la quantit\u00e9 de sucre, etc.) les liqueurs suivantes. Elles sont rang\u00e9es par ordre alphab\u00e9tique des noms de fruits. Comme pour les vins aromatis\u00e9s, les aromates compl\u00e9mentaires sont facultatifs et \u00e0 ajouter \u00e0 la mani\u00e8re d'un assaisonnement.\n\n#### **Liqueur d'abricot**\n\nIl faut des abricots bien parfum\u00e9s. Ouvrez les fruits et laissez les noyaux. La mac\u00e9ration est assez longue (2 mois environ).\n\n#### **Liqueur d'ananas**\n\nAvec un ananas coup\u00e9 en petits morceaux. Aromate compl\u00e9mentaire : une gousse de vanille.\n\n#### **Liqueur de banane**\n\nConvient bien en cr\u00e8me \u00e0 30% environ.\n\n#### **Liqueur de cassis**\n\n\u00c9crasez d'abord un peu les baies de cassis. S'il s'agit d'une cr\u00e8me, remplacez une partie de l'eau-de-vie par du vin rouge, de telle sorte que votre liqueur ne contienne que 16 \u00e0 18% d'alcool et sucrez \u00e0 400 g\/l. Aromates compl\u00e9mentaires : girofle, cannelle.\n\n#### **Liqueur de c\u00e9drat**\n\nAvec le jus et le zeste. Aromates compl\u00e9mentaires : cannelle, coriandre.\n\n#### **Liqueur de cerise**\n\nTr\u00e8s bonne avec des griottes. Utilisez du kirsch, si vous pouvez.\n\n#### **Liqueur de coing**\n\nSe fait avec des coings r\u00e2p\u00e9s recouverts d'eau-de-vie, ou mieux avec du jus de coing (mais il faut un petit pressoir ou une centrifugeuse pour jus de fruits).\n\n#### **Liqueur de fraise**\n\nAvec les fraises du jardin ou des fraises des bois.\n\n#### **Liqueur de geni\u00e8vre**\n\nNe pas \u00e9craser les baies. Comptez une poign\u00e9e ou deux de fruits par litre.\n\n#### **Liqueur de kiwi, liqueur de m\u00fbre**\n\n#### **Liqueur de myrte**\n\n\u00c9crasez un peu 2 ou 3 poign\u00e9es de baies de myrte, pour 1 l d'eau-de-vie.\n\n#### **Liqueur de n\u00e8fle**\n\nLes n\u00e8fles doivent \u00eatre \u00e9cras\u00e9es. Laissez les noyaux.\n\n#### **Liqueur de noix verte**\n\nChoisissez des noix encore tendres (en juillet), et coupez-les en morceaux. Aromates compl\u00e9mentaires : cannelle, coriandre, clous de girofle, citron... vous avez le choix!\n\n#### **Liqueur d'orange**\n\nIl faut 3 belles oranges pour 1 l d'eau-de-vie. Les couper en morceaux, sans enlever le zeste. Aromates compl\u00e9mentaires : vanille, clous de girofle, grains de caf\u00e9.\n\n#### **Liqueur de p\u00eache**\n\nUtilisez du jus de p\u00eache.\n\n#### **Liqueur de poire**\n\nAvec le jus de poires bien parfum\u00e9es, et de l'eau-de-vie de poire si possible. Aromates compl\u00e9mentaires : cannelle, girofle.\n\n#### **Liqueur de prune**\n\nAvec de petites prunes de pr\u00e9f\u00e9rence (mirabelles), ouvertes ou piqu\u00e9es \u00e0 l'aide d'une aiguille.\n\n#### **Liqueur de prunelle**\n\nIl est pr\u00e9f\u00e9rable de ne pas \u00e9craser les prunelles et de les laisser mac\u00e9rer longtemps (2 mois environ).\n\n#### **Liqueur de raisin**\n\n\u00c9crasez 1 kg de raisin tr\u00e8s parfum\u00e9 (muscat par exemple) et laissez mac\u00e9rer avec 1 l d'eau-de-vie de vin de pr\u00e9f\u00e9rence.\n\n### **_Les recettes compos\u00e9es_**\n\nPlusieurs fruits diff\u00e9rents sont mis \u00e0 mac\u00e9rer ensemble, \u00e0 moins que vous ne pr\u00e9f\u00e9riez la technique de l'assemblage d'extraits (voir p. 20).\n\n#### **Liqueur de cassis et framboise**\n\nLe m\u00e9lange des deux fruits \u00e9cras\u00e9s et mis \u00e0 mac\u00e9rer ensemble donne de tr\u00e8s savoureuses liqueurs ou cr\u00e8mes.\n\n#### **Liqueur de fruits du verger**\n\nAvec vos cerises, prunes, p\u00eaches... Comme ces fruits ne m\u00fbrissent pas en m\u00eame temps, utilisez la technique donn\u00e9e ci-apr\u00e8s pour la liqueur de vieux gar\u00e7on.\n\n#### **Liqueur de fruits exotiques**\n\nFaites mac\u00e9rer ensemble, dans du rhum par exemple, des morceaux d'ananas, banane, kiwi, mangue, orange, etc. Parfumez avec une gousse de vanille.\n\n#### **Liqueur de fruits sauvages**\n\nAssociez des petits fruits r\u00e9colt\u00e9s dans la nature : m\u00fbres, prunelles, myrtilles, fraises des bois...\n\n#### **Liqueur des petits fruits du jardin**\n\nAvec vos fraises, groseilles, framboises, cassis...\n\n#### **Liqueur des 4 fruits rouges**\n\nAvec des cerises, fraises, framboises et groseilles.\n\n#### **Liqueur de vieux gar\u00e7on**\n\nDans un tr\u00e8s grand bocal, mettez d'abord quelques oranges et citrons coup\u00e9s en rondelles (avec leur zeste), ajoutez le m\u00eame poids de sucre et recouvrez d'eau-de-vie. Puis, du printemps \u00e0 l'automne, compl\u00e9tez votre bocal en renouvelant plusieurs fois l'op\u00e9ration avec les fruits de saison qui se pr\u00e9senteront : fraises, cerises, framboises, cassis, abricots, p\u00eaches, prunes, poires... S\u00e9parez les fruits (qui peuvent d'ailleurs \u00eatre consomm\u00e9s), filtrez et d\u00e9gustez \u00e0 No\u00ebl.\n\n## **Les liqueurs de fruits secs, graines, noyaux et zestes**\n\nPour ces liqueurs, les ingr\u00e9dients proviendront plus souvent des magasins (\u00e9piceries, herboristeries) que de votre jardin ou votre verger. Leur go\u00fbt est tr\u00e8s vari\u00e9, et souvent excellent : anis, caf\u00e9, mandarine...\n\n### **_Les recettes simples_**\n\n_Recette g\u00e9n\u00e9rale_\n\nL'ingr\u00e9dient choisi doit d'abord \u00eatre r\u00e9duit en petits morceaux, puis couvert largement d'eau-de-vie. La mac\u00e9ration dure quelques semaines (elle est souvent assez rapide). Il suffit ensuite de passer, d'ajouter le sirop de sucre et de r\u00e9gler le degr\u00e9 d'alcool (g\u00e9n\u00e9ralement \u00e9lev\u00e9). Une semaine plus tard, un soutirage et, si besoin est, une filtration pr\u00e9c\u00e8deront la mise en bouteilles.\n\n_Recette-type :_  \n**L'anisette**\n\nDans un litre d'alcool \u00e0 90\u00b0 faites mac\u00e9rer pendant un mois 30 \u00e0 40 grammes de graines d'anis vert (vous pouvez y ajouter des graines de coriandre et un peu de cannelle, mais ce n'est pas obligatoire). Passez et ajoutez un sirop compos\u00e9 de 500 g de sucre et d'un litre d'eau. Filtrez au bout de quelques jours. Mettez en bouteilles.\n\nVoici, toujours par ordre alphab\u00e9tique, d'autres liqueurs qui se font de la m\u00eame mani\u00e8re.\n\n#### **Liqueur de badiane**\n\nAnisette d'un go\u00fbt diff\u00e9rent.\n\n#### **Liqueur de cacao**\n\nAvec des f\u00e8ves de cacao torr\u00e9fi\u00e9es (ou qu'on fait griller \u00e0 la po\u00eale). Il en faut au moins 100 g pour 1 l d'alcool fort. Convient bien en cr\u00e8me.\n\n#### **Liqueur de caf\u00e9**\n\nAvec du caf\u00e9 moulu (choisissez de l'arabica), ou du caf\u00e9 (liquide) tr\u00e8s fort. Aromate compl\u00e9mentaire : vanille.\n\n#### **Liqueur de citron ou citronnette**\n\nAvec des zestes de citron. Aromates compl\u00e9mentaires : cannelle, girofle. On peut colorer \u00e0 l'aide d'un caramel bien brun.\n\n#### **Liqueur de coriandre**\n\n#### **Liqueur de cumin**\n\nUne journ\u00e9e de mac\u00e9ration de graines de cumin dans l'alcool suffit.\n\n#### **Liqueur de fenouil ou fenouillette**\n\nComptez environ 50 g de graines de fenouil pour 1 l d'eau-de-vie.\n\n#### **Liqueur de mandarine**\n\nAvec les zestes. Comptez une dizaine de mandarines (ou cl\u00e9mentines) pour un litre d'eau-de-vie.\n\n#### **Liqueur de noisette ou noisettine**\n\nAvec des noisettes l\u00e9g\u00e8rement \u00e9cras\u00e9es. Convient bien en cr\u00e8me. Une variante : grillez d'abord vos noisettes \u00e0 la po\u00eale. Vous pouvez aussi ajouter un peu de vanille.\n\n#### **Liqueur de noix**\n\n\u00c9pluchez des noix et recouvrez-les d'eau-de-vie. La couleur et le go\u00fbt sont bien diff\u00e9rents de ceux de la liqueur de noix verte.\n\n#### **Liqueur de noix de coco**\n\n#### **Liqueur de noyau**\n\nPlusieurs mois de mac\u00e9ration sont n\u00e9cessaires pour \u00e9laborer ces liqueurs de noyaux (non cass\u00e9s) d'abricots, de cerises, de n\u00e8fles, de prunes ou de prunelles. Sucrez \u00e0 votre go\u00fbt.\n\n#### **Liqueur de vanille**\n\nIl faut 6 \u00e0 8 gousses de vanille pour 1 l de rhum blanc ou d'une autre eau-de-vie. Convient bien en cr\u00e8me.\n\n### **_Les recettes compos\u00e9es_**\n\n#### **Liqueur des deux anis**\n\nQuel anis pr\u00e9f\u00e9rez-vous, l'anis vert ou l'anis \u00e9toil\u00e9 (ou badiane) ? Si vous n'arrivez pas \u00e0 vous d\u00e9cider, faites une anisette avec les deux plantes.\n\n#### **Liqueur de diverses graines**\n\nChoisissez dans les exemples ci-dessus les graines dont le go\u00fbt vous pla\u00eet, et associez-les dans une m\u00eame liqueur, que vous pouvez baptiser par exemple \u00ab liqueur des cinq graines \u00bb (s'il y en a 5). Plusieurs essais sur de petites quantit\u00e9s sont n\u00e9cessaires. Le r\u00e9sultat est souvent tr\u00e8s bon.\n\nPlut\u00f4t que de mettre les graines \u00e0 mac\u00e9rer ensemble, vous pouvez aussi assembler des liqueurs d\u00e9j\u00e0 pr\u00eates, c'est plus facile de d\u00e9couvrir ainsi les bonnes associations.\n\n#### **Liqueur de divers noyaux**\n\nImmergez toutes sortes de noyaux (\u00e9vitez ceux de p\u00eaches) dans de l'eau-de-vie sucr\u00e9e. Patientez plusieurs mois.\n\n#### **Liqueur de divers zestes**\n\nM\u00e9langez des \u00e9corces de mandarine, de citron, de pamplemousse, d'orange douce ou am\u00e8re, etc.\n\n#### **Liqueur exotique**\n\nEncore une! Associez caf\u00e9, vanille et zestes de mandarine, c'est excellent.\n\n#### **Liqueur de vespetro**\n\nC'est une liqueur \u00e9labor\u00e9e \u00e0 partir de \u00ab graines \u00bb (ce sont en fait de petits fruits secs) de 3 ou 4 esp\u00e8ces d'ombellif\u00e8res : anis vert, ang\u00e9lique, coriandre, et \u00e9ventuellement fenouil. Plusieurs recettes existent, avec des proportions variables, et souvent un peu de zeste de citron; trouvez celle qui vous convient, en commen\u00e7ant, par exemple, par mettre 10 g de chaque dans 1 l d'alcool, pendant 2 semaines.\n\n#### **Mathusalem**\n\nLaissez mac\u00e9rer pendant 2 mois dans 1 l d'eau-de-vie 8 g de coriandre, 2g de graines d'anis vert, 2 g de cannelle, 2 clous de girofle et 1 gousse de vanille.\n\n## **Les liqueurs de feuilles, tiges, fleurs**\n\nCe sont des liqueurs de plantes, comme il en existe de c\u00e9l\u00e8bres : B\u00e9n\u00e9dictine, Chartreuse, Izarra, Verveine... qu'il n'est pas possible de reproduire exactement, car leur \u00e9laboration fait intervenir des op\u00e9rations de distillation, et la nature des nombreuses plantes (48 pour l'Izarra verte) qui les composent est g\u00e9n\u00e9ralement tenue secr\u00e8te. Il est toutefois possible de les imiter un peu, par simple mac\u00e9ration de feuilles assez faciles \u00e0 trouver. Ce sont les recettes compos\u00e9es qui s'en rapprocheront le plus; mais certaines recettes simples sont \u00e9galement excellentes.\n\n### **_Les recettes simples_**\n\n_Recette g\u00e9n\u00e9rale_\n\nIl suffit de mettre \u00e0 mac\u00e9rer les feuilles, tiges ou fleurs, fra\u00eeches ou s\u00e8ches, dans de l'alcool fort ou de l'eau-de-vie assez neutre, puis de sucrer \u00e0 sa convenance \u00e0 l'aide d'un sirop. La mac\u00e9ration sera tr\u00e8s courte (un jour ou deux) pour des feuilles fines et aromatiques, beaucoup plus longue pour des tiges \u00e9paisses (quelques semaines). Le degr\u00e9 d'alcool de ce type de liqueur est souvent tr\u00e8s \u00e9lev\u00e9 : environ 50% pour les liqueurs vertes, 40% pour les liqueurs jaunes; il est possible d'en faire de moins alcoolis\u00e9es (30 \u00e0 35%). La teneur en sucre est g\u00e9n\u00e9ralement de l'ordre de 300 g\/l. Rappel : la couleur verte provient de la mac\u00e9ration de certaines feuilles (comme celles de la tanaisie ou de la verveine) \u00e0 l'obscurit\u00e9, tandis que la couleur jaune s'obtient en ajoutant du safran.\n\n_Recette-type :_  \n**La liqueur de tanaisie**\n\nLaissez mac\u00e9rer deux jours, \u00e0 l'abri de la lumi\u00e8re, une poign\u00e9e de feuilles de tanaisie dans de l'eau-de-vie blanche tr\u00e8s forte. Enlevez les feuilles. Ajoutez un sirop compos\u00e9 de 300 g de sucre et d'un grand verre d'eau (15 cl). Vous obtenez ainsi une liqueur d'une magnifique couleur verte, au parfum prononc\u00e9 de la plante (qu'on appelle d'ailleurs \u00ab chartreuse \u00bb dans certaines r\u00e9gions). Cette liqueur peut se boire pure, ou servir de base \u00e0 l'\u00e9laboration d'une liqueur verte compos\u00e9e de plusieurs plantes.\n\nVoici d'autres exemples de recettes simples.\n\n#### **_Liqueur de feuilles..._**\n\n#### **... d'absinthe**\n\nOn en trouve encore des recettes, mais sa fabrication est d\u00e9sormais interdite en France, en raison de la toxicit\u00e9 de certaines substances qu'elle contient (le thuyol en particulier). A \u00e9viter.\n\n#### **... d'ang\u00e9lique**\n\nLaissez mac\u00e9rer une semaine. Aromates compl\u00e9mentaires : vanille, girofle, zeste d'orange, brin de menthe. A laisser vieillir.\n\n#### **... de basilic**\n\nIl faut une grosse poign\u00e9e de feuilles pour 1 l d'alcool.\n\n#### **... de cassis**\n\nAvec une poign\u00e9e de jeunes feuilles fra\u00eeches. R\u00e9duire le degr\u00e9 (\u00e0 35%) avec du vin blanc.\n\n#### **... de citronnelle**\n\nAutre nom de la m\u00e9lisse (voir ce mot). On appelle encore citronnelle d'autres plantes, dont une est facile \u00e0 trouver, car elle est vendue s\u00e9ch\u00e9e comme plante \u00e0 tisane; vous pouvez aussi en faire une liqueur.\n\n#### **... d'estragon**\n\nIl faut environ 40 g de feuilles (par litre d'eau-de-vie), et laisser mac\u00e9rer longtemps (plusieurs semaines). Aromate compl\u00e9mentaire : vanille (vous pouvez par exemple ajouter un sachet de sucre vanill\u00e9). Cette liqueur doit vieillir, et ressemble alors (selon certains) \u00e0 la B\u00e9n\u00e9dictine.\n\n#### **... de g\u00e9n\u00e9pi**\n\n#### **... d'hysope**\n\n#### **... de laurier**\n\nAromates compl\u00e9mentaires : muscade, girofle.\n\n#### **... de m\u00e9lisse**\n\nLes feuilles (fra\u00eeches ou s\u00e8ches) de m\u00e9lisse (ou citronnelle) doivent mac\u00e9rer assez longtemps (environ 8 jours).\n\n#### **... de menthe**\n\nConvient bien en cr\u00e8me.\n\n#### **... de myrte**\n\n#### **... de p\u00eacher**\n\nSon go\u00fbt de noyau est tr\u00e8s appr\u00e9ci\u00e9. Cette liqueur peut ne contenir que 150 g de sucre par litre, elle n'en sera que meilleure.\n\n#### **... de persil**\n\nUne curiosit\u00e9 \u00e0 essayer.\n\n#### **... de romarin**\n\n#### **... de sauge**\n\nAvec des feuilles de sauge, fra\u00eeches si possible, auxquelles vous pouvez ajouter une pinc\u00e9e de feuilles de menthe.\n\n#### **... de th\u00e9**\n\nFaites mac\u00e9rer du th\u00e9 (feuilles s\u00e9ch\u00e9es) dans de l'eau-de-vie, mais n'en mettez pas trop (1 c. \u00e0 s. pour 1 l suffit).\n\n#### **... de verveine**\n\nAvec une centaine de feuilles par litre d'eau-de-vie et un ou deux mois de mac\u00e9ration. On peut remplacer une partie du sucre par du miel. Le r\u00e9sultat est une magnifique liqueur verte.\n\n#### **_Liqueurs de fleurs..._**\n\nPour ces liqueurs la mac\u00e9ration doit durer environ un mois.\n\n#### **... d'acacia**\n\nCompter 300 grappes de fleurs par litre d'eau-de-vie. Vous pouvez ajouter un peu de vanille.\n\n#### **... de bouillon blanc**\n\nIl faut beaucoup de fleurs.\n\n#### **... de camomille**\n\n#### **... de jasmin**\n\nCueillez 150 \u00e0 200 g de fleurs (pour 1 l). Certaines recettes conseillent de jeter les fleurs dans le sirop de sucre br\u00fblant, puis de laisser refroidir cette infusion avant d'ajouter l'alcool:\n\n#### **... de magnolia**\n\nAvec des p\u00e9tales de fleurs blanches coup\u00e9s en morceaux, et un peu de vanille.\n\n#### **... de millepertuis**\n\nUtilisez pour la mac\u00e9ration 10 g de fleurs s\u00e8ches et ajoutez un demi-citron.\n\n#### **... d'\u0153illet**\n\n\u00c9pluchez des \u0153illets rouges dits \u00ab \u0153illets \u00e0 ratafia \u00bb, et n'utilisez que les p\u00e9tales. Aromates compl\u00e9mentaires : cannelle, girofle.\n\n#### **... d'oranger**\n\nAvec 150 g de p\u00e9tales pour 1 l d'eau-de-vie. Si vous avez moins de fleurs, compl\u00e9tez avec de l'eau de fleur d'oranger.\n\n#### **... de rose**\n\nCueillez 100 \u00e0 200 g de p\u00e9tales de rose bien parfum\u00e9s (pour 1 l). Aromates compl\u00e9mentaires : coriandre, muscade, girofle.\n\n#### **... de thym**\n\nCouvrez d'eau-de-vie une grande quantit\u00e9 de fleurs de thym. Laissez mac\u00e9rer longtemps (2 \u00e0 3 mois). Sucrez abondamment (400 g\/l). Et vous obtenez une liqueur connue sous le nom d'\u00ab \u00e9lixir de thym \u00bb.\n\n#### **... de tilleul**\n\nAvec des fleurs fra\u00eeches de pr\u00e9f\u00e9rence.\n\n#### **... de violette**\n\nPour 1 l d'eau-de-vie, il vous faut 250 g de p\u00e9tales frais de violette odorante. Huit jours de mac\u00e9ration suffisent. Aromates compl\u00e9mentaires : cannelle, girofle.\n\n#### **_Liqueur de tiges..._**\n\n#### **... d'ang\u00e9lique**\n\nPr\u00e9voyez 50 \u00e0 150 g de tiges vertes pour 1 l d'eau-de-vie. Laissez mac\u00e9rer plusieurs semaines. Aromates compl\u00e9mentaires : cannelle, muscade, girofle, amandes am\u00e8res. Convient bien en cr\u00e8me. S'accorde bien avec le miel.\n\n#### **... de c\u00e9leri**\n\nOriginale. Avec 250 g de tiges (c\u00f4tes) et 1 l d'eau-de-vie. Aromates compl\u00e9mentaires : coriandre, anis vert, girofle.\n\n#### **... de fenouil**\n\nA essayer.\n\n### **_Recettes compos\u00e9es_**\n\nVoici des recettes connues et quelques id\u00e9es nouvelles.\n\n**Chartreuse jaune** (imitation)\n\nHachez des feuilles fra\u00eeches de m\u00e9lisse (6 g), d'hysope (6 g) et d'ang\u00e9lique (3 g), et mettez-les \u00e0 mac\u00e9rer 10 jours dans 1 l d'alcool avec un peu de cannelle (1,5 g) et de la coriandre (4 g). Colorez avec du safran. R\u00e9duisez le degr\u00e9 (\u00e0 40%) et sucrez \u00e0 300 g\/l.\n\n**Chartreuse verte** (imitation)\n\nDans 1 l d'alcool m\u00ealez des feuilles fra\u00eeches de menthe, d'ang\u00e9lique, de sauge et de m\u00e9lisse (1 \u00e0 2 g de chaque). Laissez une journ\u00e9e, puis ajoutez des feuilles de tanaisie (10 g environ) et laissez mac\u00e9rer quelques heures seulement (5 \u00e0 10) \u00e0 l'obscurit\u00e9. R\u00e9duisez \u00e0 50\u00b0. Sucrez.\n\n#### **Liqueur de feuilles**\n\nPlut\u00f4t que de mettre \u00e0 mac\u00e9rer plusieurs sortes de feuilles ensemble (comme dans la recette pr\u00e9c\u00e9dente), sans savoir quel sera le go\u00fbt final, voici une autre technique pour r\u00e9aliser une belle liqueur verte \u00e0 base de feuilles aromatiques. Faites d'abord s\u00e9par\u00e9ment des liqueurs de tanaisie, menthe, sauge, m\u00e9lisse, verveine, ang\u00e9lique, romarin, etc. Prenez ensuite un r\u00e9cipient gradu\u00e9 (verre doseur par exemple), et sur de petites quantit\u00e9 (que vous notez) essayez diff\u00e9rentes associations. Vous en d\u00e9couvrirez de d\u00e9licieuses, et bien personnelles. Vous pourrez aussi ajouter un peu de vos liqueurs de graines (fenouil, anis...) ou de zestes (citron, mandarine) : tout est permis, seule la qualit\u00e9 du r\u00e9sultat compte.\n\n#### **Liqueur de g\u00e9n\u00e9pi des Alpes**\n\nPour 1 l d'alcool il vous faut des feuilles s\u00e9ch\u00e9es de g\u00e9n\u00e9pi (4 g) et de menthe poivr\u00e9e (2 g), auxquelles vous ajoutez des graines d'anis vert, d'ang\u00e9lique, de coriandre et de fenouil (1 g de chaque).\n\n#### **Liqueur de fleurs du jardin**\n\nFaites mac\u00e9rer ensemble des p\u00e9tales de rose, d'\u0153illet, des fleurs de jasmin, de violettes...\n\n## **Les liqueurs sp\u00e9ciales**\n\nCertaines liqueurs rentrent dificilement dans les cat\u00e9gories pr\u00e9c\u00e9dentes, en raison de l'originalit\u00e9 de leurs ingr\u00e9dients, de leur technique de fabrication ou de leur go\u00fbt bien \u00ab sp\u00e9cial \u00bb. En voici quelques-unes.\n\n#### **Chrysomel**\n\nParfumez d'abord 1 l d'eau-de-vie en y faisant mac\u00e9rer deux semaines une gousse de vanille. Faites bouillir 1 kg de miel dans 2 l d'eau, sans couvrir, jusqu'\u00e0 ce qu'il ne reste plus qu'environ 1 l de liquide. Laissez refroidir ce sirop et versez-y votre eau-de-vie aromatis\u00e9e. Attendez 15 j. Filtrez avant de mettre en bouteilles.\n\n#### **Liqueur aux \u0153ufs**\n\nDans un grand bocal versez le jus de 5 citrons. D\u00e9posez-y d\u00e9licatement 3 \u0153ufs tr\u00e8s frais dont vous aurez perc\u00e9 le gros bout (c\u00f4t\u00e9 \u00ab chambre \u00e0 air \u00bb) \u00e0 l'aide d'une aiguille. Deux jours plus tard, battez ce m\u00e9lange (en cassant les \u0153ufs), passez-le avec un torchon \u00e0 confiture, et ajoutez 1\/4 l d'eau-de-vie et 125 g de sucre. Vous pouvez alors mettre en bouteille et d\u00e9guster cette cr\u00e8me citronn\u00e9e (\u00e0 conserver au r\u00e9frig\u00e9rateur).\n\n#### **Liqueur de lait ou opaline**\n\nM\u00ealez 3\/4 l de lait et autant d'eau-de-vie; ajoutez 400 g de sucre, un citron coup\u00e9 en rondelles et une gousse de vanille. Laissez mac\u00e9rer 2 semaines en remuant tous les jours. Soutirez et filtrez sur papier, de mani\u00e8re \u00e0 obtenir une liqueur tr\u00e8s claire... et de go\u00fbt d\u00e9licieux.\n\n#### **Liqueur dor\u00e9e**\n\nLaissez mac\u00e9rer 8 jours dans 1 l d'eau-de-vie, 0,4 l de vin de Malaga, 3 g de quinquina, 3 g de cannelle, 3 g d'\u00e9corces d'oranges am\u00e8res, et un peu de safran pour la couleur. Ajoutez 250 g de sucre.\n\n#### **Liqueur de gingembre**\n\nAvec 50 g de racine (ou plut\u00f4t de rhizome) de gingembre pour 1 l d'alcool, vous obtenez (apr\u00e8s avoir sucr\u00e9 et r\u00e9duit le degr\u00e9) une liqueur tr\u00e8s \u00e9pic\u00e9e.\n\n#### **Liqueur du pendu**\n\nChoisissez une belle orange ou une belle poire Williams. Avec une ficelle de cuisine (et l'aide d'un passe-laine) suspendez-la dans un bocal au-dessus d'1\/2 l d'eau-de-vie blanche aussi neutre que possible, \u00e0 laquelle vous avez ajout\u00e9 200 g de sucre. Le fruit ne doit pas toucher le liquide. Fermez herm\u00e9tiquement. Exposez au soleil. 2 ou 3 mois plus tard, jetez le fruit et d\u00e9gustez le liquide parfum\u00e9.\n\n#### **Liqueur stimulante**\n\nFaites mac\u00e9rer 3 j dans 1\/2 l d'eau-de-vie 30 g d'anis vert, 20 g de badiane, 30 g de feuilles de menthe, 15 g de feuilles de menthe, 15 g de feuilles de sauge et 10 g de feuilles de thym. La teinture obtenue ne se boit pas pure, mais doit \u00eatre allong\u00e9e d'eau sucr\u00e9e ou de vin blanc doux.\n\nEnfin, voici une recette tr\u00e8s classique, qui vous donnera en plus d'une excellente liqueur quelque chose \u00e0 vous mettre sous la dent :\n\n#### **Fruits \u00e0 l'eau-de-vie**\n\nChoisissez de tr\u00e8s beaux fruits (avec de gros fruits tels que p\u00eaches et poires, c'est possible \u00e9galement, mais il faut d'abord les faire cuire dans un sirop), par exemple :\n\n\u2014 des framboises;\n\n\u2014 des cerises, dont vous coupez la moiti\u00e9 du p\u00e9doncule (queue);\n\n\u2014 des mirabelles, dont vous percez la peau en de nombreux points \u00e0 l'aide d'une aiguille, et auxquelles vous laissez une partie de la queue;\n\n\u2014 des grains de raisin que vous pr\u00e9levez avec une paire de ciseaux, de mani\u00e8re \u00e0 conserver un petit porceau de p\u00e9doncule.\n\nGarnissez-en un grand bocal par couches successives, s\u00e9par\u00e9es de quelques cuiller\u00e9es de sucre en poudre (on pourrait aussi ne sucrer qu'\u00e0 la fin avec un sirop). Couvrez d'eau-de-vie pour fruits. Laissez mac\u00e9rer au moins deux mois, avant de commencer \u00e0 d\u00e9guster, dans une coupe, de d\u00e9licieux fruits baignant dans une liqueur non moins savoureuse.\n\n_Votre avis nous int\u00e9resse !\n\nLaissez un commentaire sur le site de votre libraire en ligne et partagez vos coups de c\u0153ur sur les r\u00e9seaux sociaux !_\n\n## **Conclusion**\n\nVous aviez envie de fabriquer vous-m\u00eame des ap\u00e9ritifs et des liqueurs. Vous aviez sans doute d\u00e9j\u00e0 quelque exp\u00e9rience. Vous voil\u00e0 maintenant mieux arm\u00e9s pour r\u00e9ussir : des recettes, des id\u00e9es de recettes, mais surtout, je l'esp\u00e8re, une meilleure compr\u00e9hension de ces recettes, des m\u00e9thodes \u00e0 mettre en \u0153uvre pour parvenir \u00e0 \u00e9laborer une boisson pleinement r\u00e9ussie, m\u00eame avec les petits moyens dont dispose un amateur.\n\nCe petit livre peut aussi vous permettre, si vous le d\u00e9sirez, d'aller plus loin : de mettre au point vous-m\u00eame des recettes originales, nouvelles, avec des ingr\u00e9dients inhabituels (par exemple, en essayant les nouveaux fruits exotiques actuellement en vogue), ou en d\u00e9couvrant des associations particuli\u00e8rement exquises... : un vaste champ de recherche s'ouvre devant vous.\n\nM\u00eame sans voir si grand, l'\u00e9laboration en amateur de spiritueux est un loisir plein d'avantages qui ne peut qu'am\u00e9liorer la qualit\u00e9 de la vie de celui qui la pratique, ainsi que de son entourage. C'est en effet une activit\u00e9 tr\u00e8s int\u00e9ressante, autant manuelle qu'intellectuelle, qui d\u00e9veloppe les sens de l'odorat et du go\u00fbt. Elle permet des contacts agr\u00e9ables avec ses amis. De plus, elle d\u00e9bouche sur un produit naturel, de bonne qualit\u00e9, sans substances chimiques, sans risque pour la sant\u00e9... \u00e0 condition de n'en user qu'avec mod\u00e9ration.\n**ADRESSES UTILES**\n\n_fabricants et distributeurs de mat\u00e9riel_  \n**Tom Press,** ZA de la Condamine,  \n81540 SOREZE. T\u00e9l. 05 63 71 44 99.  \nFax 05 63 71 44 98  \n@: infos@tompress.com  \nSite : www.tompress.com\n\n**Duhall\u00e9,** la boutique du ma\u00eetre de chai\n\nZI du Bois Vert, 31120 Portet sur  \nGaronne. T\u00e9l. 05 62 11 73 01  \n**Sanbri,** l'atelier du vin, route de  \nChepoix, 60120 Breteuil.\n\n**BMS Wijndepot NV,** Brugsesteeweg  \n313-317, B-8520 Kuurne  \nT\u00e9l. 00 32 (0)56 71 46 65. Fax 00 32 (0)56 71 84 64\n\n@: bms-wijndepot@skynet.be  \nSite : www.bmswijndepot.com\n\n**Brouwland**\n\nKorspelsesteenweg, 86  \nB-3581 Beverlo  \nT\u00e9l. 00 32 11 40 14 08  \nFax 00 32 11 34 73 59  \nite : www.brouwland.com\n\n## **Index**\n\nAbricot -35\n\nAbsinthe -26-41\n\nAcacia -42\n\nAk\u00e8ne\n\nAlcool\n\nAlcoom\u00e8tre\n\nAmer\n\nAnanas -35\n\nAng\u00e9lique 8\/9-12 -41-43\n\nAnis -38\/39\n\nAnisette\n\nArbouse\n\nArmagnac\n\nArnica\n\nAsp\u00e9rule -26\n\nBadiane -38\/39\n\nBanane -36\n\nBasilic -26-41\n\nBitter\n\nBouillon blanc\n\nBouleau -27\n\nBourbon\n\nCacao -38\n\nCaf\u00e9 -38\n\nCalvados\n\nCamomille -27\n\nCannelle\n\nCarthag\u00e8ne\n\nCassis -26-27 -37-41\n\nC\u00e9drat -35\n\nC\u00e9leri -43\n\nCerfeuil\n\nCerise -36-46\n\nCerisier  -26\n\nChartreuse\n\nChicor\u00e9e -28\n\nChrysomel\n\nCitron -38\n\nCitronnelle -41\n\nCitron nette\n\nClou de girofle\n\nCognac\n\nCoing -36\n\nCoprah\n\nCoriandre -38\n\nCr\u00e8me -35\n\nCumin -39\n\nDatte -30\n\nD\u00e9cantation\n\nD\u00e9coction\n\nEau-de-vie\n\nEstragon -41\n\n\u00c9thanol\n\n\u00c9tiquette\n\nExtrait\n\nFenouil -12-28 -43\n\nFenou illette\n\nFigue -30\n\nFiltre\n\nFraise -36\n\nFraise des bois -36\n\nFramboise 11\/12 -35-37-46\n\nFruit de la passion\n\nG\u00e9n\u00e9pi -41-44\n\nGeni\u00e8vre -28\n\nGentiane -28-31\n\nGingembre -45\n\nGirofle\n\nGroseille -30\n\nGuignolet\n\nHysope -41\n\nInfusion\n\nJasmin -42\n\nKirsch\n\nKiwi -36\n\nLait\n\nLaurier -41\n\nLiqueur dor\u00e9e\n\nLiqueur exotique\n\nLiqueur stimulante\n\nLitchi\n\nMac\u00e9ration\n\nMagnolia -42\n\nMandarine -39\n\nMangue\n\nMarrube blanc\n\nMathusalem\n\nM\u00e9lisse -26-41\n\nMenthe -26-41\n\nMerise\n\nMethanol\n\nMiel\n\nMillepertuis -43\n\nMirabelle -36-46\n\nMistelle\n\nM\u00fbre -36\n\nMuscat -37\n\nMyrte -36-42\n\nMyrtille -36\n\nN\u00e8fle -36\n\nNoisette -39\n\nNoisettine\n\nNoix 11\/12-28-36\n\nNoix de coco\n\nNoyau -40\n\nNoyer -27\n\n\u0152illet -43\n\n\u0152ufs\n\nOpaline\n\nOrange -28-36\n\nOranger -43\n\nOrigan\n\nPamplemousse -28\n\nPastis\n\nP\u00eache -13 -46\n\nP\u00eacher -26-42\n\nPendu\n\nPersil -42\n\nPervenche -27\n\nPineau\n\nPoire -36-46\n\nPommeau\n\nPrune -36\n\nPruneau -28\n\nPrunelle -37\n\nPrunellier -27\n\nPrunier -27\n\nQuetsche\n\nQuinquina -25\n\nRaisin 11\/12-37\n\nRatafia -34\n\nRhum\n\nRiquiqui\n\nRobinier\n\nRomarin 9\/10-27\n\nRose -43\n\nSafran\n\nSarriette -27\n\nSauge -27-42\n\nSerpolet\n\nSiphon\n\nSirop\n\nSoutirage\n\nSpiritueux\n\nSureau noir\n\nTanaisie 9\/10 40\/41\n\nTilleul -43\n\nTh\u00e9 -42\n\nThym 9\/10-43\n\nVanille -39\n\nVermouth\n\nVerveine -42\n\nVespetro\n\nVieux gar\u00e7on\n\nViolette -43\n\nVodka -33\n\nWhisky\n\nWilliams -45\n\nZeste \n**Chez le m\u00eame \u00e9diteur en num\u00e9rique**\n\n**Polars \u00ab La part des anges \u00bb**\n\n_Pourriture noble et vendange tardive_ , Jean-Marc Carit\u00e9\n\n_Araign\u00e9e rouge et cigogne noire_ , Jean-Marc Carit\u00e9\n\n_La revanche du gringet_ , Jean-Marc Carit\u00e9\n\n_Atomes crochus_ , Jean-Marc Carit\u00e9\n\n**L'Encyclop\u00e9die d'Utovie**\n\n_Faites vos ap\u00e9ritifs et vos liqueurs... \u00e0 votre go\u00fbt_ , J-A. Chardon\n\n_Faites votre bi\u00e8re_ , J-A. Chardon\n\n_Faites votre serre facile et productive_ , Christophe Geoffrion\n\n_Vivre centenaire et bien portant_ , Dr Dominique Georget-Tessier\n\n**Henri Guillemin : l'histoire autrement**\n\n_1789-1792\/1792-1794 : Les deux R\u00e9volutions fran\u00e7aises_ , Henri Guillemin\n\n_1789 : silence aux pauvres !_ , Henri Guillemin\n\n**Catalogue complet (avec achat s\u00e9curis\u00e9 en ligne) sur  \nwww.utovie.com**\n\n\u00a9 \u00c9ditions d'Utovie  \n402 route des Pyr\u00e9n\u00e9es  \n40320 Bats  \nutovie@wanadoo.fr  \nwww.utovie.com\n\ne-ISBN : 9782868194046\n\n\u00a9 2016, version num\u00e9rique Primento et \u00c9ditions d'Utovie\n\nCe livre a \u00e9t\u00e9 r\u00e9alis\u00e9 par _Primento_ , le partenaire num\u00e9rique des \u00e9diteurs\n","meta":{"redpajama_set_name":"RedPajamaBook"}}
+{"text":"#  THE  \nPOWER  \nOF A\n\n# _Praying \u00ae  \nWoman_\n\nSTORMIE  \nOMARTIAN\n\nHARVEST HOUSE\u2122 PUBLISHERS  \nEUGENE, OREGON\nUnless otherwise indicated, Scripture verses are taken from the New King James Version. Copyright \u00a9 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.\n\nVerses marked NLT are taken from the _Holy Bible_ , New Living Translation, copyright \u00a91996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189, U.S.A. All rights reserved.\n\nVerses marked ASV are taken from the American Standard Version of the Bible.\n\nAll the stories related in this book are true, but most of the names have been changed to protect the privacy of the people mentioned.\n\nTHE POWER OF A PRAYING is a registered trademark of The Hawkins Children's LLC. Harvest House Publishers, Inc., is the exclusive licensee of the federally registered trademark THE POWER OF A PRAYING.\n\n_Cover by Koechel Peterson & Associates, Minneapolis, Minnesota_\n\n**THE POWER OF A PRAYING \u00ae WOMAN**\n\nCopyright \u00a9 2002 By Stormie Omartian\n\nPublished by Harvest House Publishers Eugene, Oregon 97402 www.harvesthousepublishers.com\n\nLibrary of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data\n\nOmartian, Stormie.\n\nThe power of a praying woman \/ Stormie Omartian.\n\np. cm.\n\nIncludes bibliographical references.\n\nISBN 0-7369-0974-5 (Deluxe Edition)\n\nISBN 0-7369-0855-2 (Trade Edition)\n\n1. Christian women\u2014Religious life. 2. Prayer\u2014Christianity. I. Title.\n\nBV4527 .0435 2002\n\n248.8' 43\u2014dc21\n\n2002006077\n\n**All rights reserved.** No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means\u2014electronic, mechanical, digital, photocopy, recording, or any other\u2014except for brief quotations in printed reviews, without the prior permission of the publisher.\n\n**Printed in the United States of America.**\n\n05 06 07 08 09 10 11 \/ RDS-KB \/ 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2\n\n_This book is dedicated to my sisters in Christ all over the  \nworld who long to deepen their walk with the Lord,  \nmove into everything God has for them, and become  \nall He made them to be_.\n\n## _Acknowledgments_\n\nWith special thanks:\n\nTo Susan Martinez, for your prayer support and hard work as my secretary, assistant, prayer partner, and friend.\n\nTo my husband, Michael, for your love, prayers, and good cooking.\n\nTo my children, for simply living.\n\nTo my faithful prayer partners.\n\nTo Pastor Jack Hayford, Pastor Rice Broocks, Pastor Tim Johnson, Pastor Ray McCollum, Pastor John Roher, Pastor Jim Laffoon, and Pastor Scott Bauer, for your life-saving prayers and life-changing words.\n\nTo my Harvest House family\u2014Bob Hawkins Jr., Carolyn McCready, Terry Glaspey, Betty Fletcher, Julie McKinney, Teresa Evenson, LaRae Weikert, Kim Moore, and Peggy Wright\u2014for all your encouragement and support.\n\nTo the thousands of women who have sent letters, e-mail, and faxes to me sharing your struggles, joys, longings, and the desires of your heart.\n\n## _Contents_\n\nAcknowledgments\n\nThe Power\n\n1. Lord, Draw Me into a Closer Walk with You\n\n2. Lord, Cleanse Me and Make My Heart Right Before You\n\n3. Lord, Help Me to Be a Forgiving Person\n\n4. Lord, Teach Me to Walk in Obedience to Your Ways\n\n5. Lord, Strengthen Me to Stand Against the Enemy\n\n6. Lord, Show Me How to Take Control of My Mind\n\n7. Lord, Rule Me in Every Area of My Life\n\n8. Lord, Take Me Deeper in Your Word\n\n9. Lord, Instruct Me as I Put My Life in Right Order\n\n10. Lord, Prepare Me to Be a True Worshiper\n\n11. Lord, Bless Me in the Work I Do\n\n12. Lord, Plant Me so I Will Bear the Fruit of Your Spirit\n\n13. Lord, Preserve Me in Purity and Holiness\n\n14. Lord, Move Me into the Purpose for Which I Was Created\n\n15. Lord, Guide Me in All My Relationships\n\n16. Lord, Keep Me in the Center of Your Will\n\n17. Lord, Protect Me and All I Care About\n\n18. Lord, Give Me Wisdom to Make Right Decisions\n\n19. Lord, Deliver Me from Every Evil Work\n\n20. Lord, Set Me Free from Negative Emotions\n\n21. Lord, Comfort Me in Times of Trouble\n\n22. Lord, Enable Me to Resist the Temptation to Sin\n\n23. Lord, Heal Me and Help Me Care for My Body\n\n24. Lord, Free Me from Ungodly Fear\n\n25. Lord, Use Me to Touch the Lives of Others\n\n26. Lord, Train Me to Speak Only Words That Bring Life\n\n27. Lord, Transform Me into a Woman of Mountain-Moving Faith\n\n28. Lord, Change Me into the Likeness of Christ\n\n29. Lord, Lift Me out of My Past\n\n30. Lord, Lead Me into the Future You Have for Me\n\nOTHER BOOKS BY STORMIE OMARTIAN\n_Let the beauty of the L ORD our God be upon us,  \nand establish the work of our hands for us_.  \n **P SALM 90:17**\n\n## The Power\n\nIt doesn't matter what age you are, what your marital status is, what the condition of your body and soul is, or how long you have or have not been a believer\u2014if you are a woman, this book is for you. I've been a devoted follower of the Lord for over 30 years and I have not fallen away from Him in all that time, yet I need this book too. In fact, I wrote it for myself as much as I wrote it for you. That's because I'm like you. Many days I find life difficult rather than easy, complex rather than simple, potentially dangerous rather than safe, and exhausting rather than exhilarating. Often it's more like a strong, hot, dry wind than it is a soft, cool, refreshing breeze.\n\nBut I have come to know that God can smooth my path, calm the storms, keep me and all I care about safe, and even make my way simple when I ask Him to carry the complexities of life for me. But these things don't just happen. Not without prayer.\n\nIn the midst of our busy lives, too often we don't pray enough. Or we only pray about the most pressing issues and neglect to take the time to really get close to God, to know Him better, and to share with Him the deepest longings of our heart. In our pray-and-run existence, we shut off the very avenue by which He brings blessings into our lives. And we risk waking up one day with that empty, insecure feeling in the pit of our stomach frightening us with the thought that our foundation may be turning into sand and our protective armor may be becoming as fragile as an eggshell. This is what happened to me.\n\nA few years ago, I had become so busy with working, taking care of teenagers, trying to be a good wife, running a home, writing books and traveling to promote them, being at all church meetings, helping people who needed it, and trying to make everyone happy, that I neglected the most important thing\u2014my intimate walk with God. It's not that I stopped walking with Him. To the contrary, I couldn't make it through a day without Him. It's not that I stopped praying. Actually, I was praying more than ever about everyone else on the planet. But I didn't pray about my own walk with Him. It's not that I didn't read His Word. I read for hours as I did research in the Scriptures for different projects I was working on and the Bible study classes I was taking. But I didn't give God time to speak to me personally through it. I was busy doing good and neglected to do what was best. I became Martha instead of Mary without even realizing it (Luke 10:38-42).\n\nI didn't take enough time for God and me alone, and as a result I became so depleted I couldn't go on. I felt like that eggshell, as if I could be crushed with very little outside pressure. I knew I needed more of God in my life, and nothing on earth was more important than that. There wasn't anything else that could satisfy the hunger I felt inside except more of His presence. And I came to realize how important it was for me to guard and protect my personal relationship with God in prayer.\n\nThe way to avoid the kind of thing I experienced is to pray about every aspect of our life in such a manner that it will keep us spiritually anchored and reminded of what God's promises are to us. It will keep us focused on who God is and who He made us to be. It will help us live God's way and not our own. It will lift our eyes from the temporal to the eternal and show us what is really important. It will give us the ability to distinguish the truth from a lie. It will strengthen our faith and encourage us to believe for the impossible. It will enable us to become the women of God we _long_ to be and believe we _can_ be. Who among us doesn't need that?\n\nIn my previous books on prayer, I have shared the ways husbands and wives can pray for one another, parents can pray for their children, and people can pray for their nation. In this book, I want to share how _you_ can pray for _YOU_. I want to help you draw close to your heavenly Father, to feel His arms around you, to maintain a right heart before Him, to live in the confidence of knowing you are in the center of His will, to discover more fully who He made you to be, to find wholeness and completeness in Him, and to move into all He has for you. In other words, I want to show you how to effectively cover your life in prayer so that you can have more of God in your life.\n\n### Why Is It so Hard to Pray for Myself?\n\nDo you find it is easier to pray for other people than it is to pray for yourself? I know I do. I can pray for my husband, my children, other family members, acquaintances, friends, and people I've never even met whom I hear about in the news far easier than I can pray for my own needs. For one thing, their needs are easy for me to identify. Mine are numerous, sometimes complicated, often difficult to determine, and certainly not easy to label. We women know what we _think_ we need most of the time. We are able to recognize the obvious. But we are often too emotionally involved in the people around us and the day-to-day existence of our lives to be able to figure out how we should be praying for ourselves beyond the immediate and urgent. Sometimes we can be so overwhelmed by our circumstances that our prayer is simply a basic cry for help.\n\nDo you ever have times when your life seems out of control? Do you ever feel pressured, as if your days are so busy that you fear you're missing out on a certain quality of life because of it? Do you worry that you are neglecting one or more areas of your life because you are trying to fill numerous roles and meet many expectations? I've experienced that too.\n\nHave you ever felt as if your life is stuck in one place and you're going nowhere? Or worse yet, you are going backward? Have you had times when you've lost your vision for the future? Or have you never really had one to begin with? Have you wondered whether you can actually move into the full purpose and destiny God has for you? Have you experienced feelings of emptiness, frustration, or unfulfillment? I, too, have felt all those things.\n\nDo you hunger for a greater sense of the Lord's presence in your life? Do you desire to know God in a deeper way? Do you want to serve Him better and more completely but don't feel you have the time, energy, or opportunity to do so? Do you need to spend more time with Him in prayer? Do you want your prayers to be accompanied by greater faith so that you can see greater answers to them? Do you need a more complete knowledge and understanding of God's Word? Do you ever just long to throw your arms wide open and embrace Jesus, white robes and all, and feel His embrace of you? So do I.\n\nThe good news is that this is the way God _wants_ you to feel.\n\nGod wants you to long for _His_ presence. He wants you to find your fulfillment in _Him_ and nothing else. He wants you to walk closely with _Him_. He wants you to increase in faith and knowledge of _His_ Word. He wants you to put all your hopes and dreams in _His_ hands and look to _Him_ to meet all of your needs. When you do, _He_ will open the storehouse of blessing upon your life. That's because these things are _His_ will for you.\n\nBut none of this happens without prayer.\n\n### Where Do I Go to Get My Needs Met?\n\nEvery woman has needs. But many of us are guilty of looking to other people to meet them\u2014especially the men in our lives. Too often we expect _them_ to meet the needs that only _God_ can fill. And then we are disappointed when they can't. We expect too much from _them_ when our expectations should be in _God_.\n\nMy friend Lisa Bevere expressed it best when she said that for centuries women have \"wrestled and waged war with the sons of Adam in an attempt to get them to bless us and affirm our value. But this struggle has left us frustrated at best. . . . In the end, it is all a senseless and exhausting process in which both parties lose. It is not the fault of the sons of Adam; they cannot give us the blessing we seek, and we have frightened them by giving them so much power over our souls. We must learn that the blessings we truly need come only from God.\"*\n\nWe will never be happy until we make _God_ the source of our fulfillment and the answer to our longings. He is the _only_ one who should have power over our souls.\n\nWe have to put our expectations in the Lord and not in other things or people. I know this is easier said than done. So let's start with the easy part. Let's say to God, \"Lord, I look to You for everything I need in my life. Help me to put all my expectations in You.\" And whenever you are disappointed because your needs are not being met, talk to yourself and say, \"My soul, wait silently for God alone, for my expectation is from Him\" (Psalm 62:5). Then tell God about all your needs and everything that is in your heart. Don't worry, He won't be surprised or shocked. He already knows. He is just waiting to hear it from you.\n\n### More Than Just a Survivor\n\nIf you're like me, you don't want to live the kind of life where you are barely hanging on. You don't want to merely eke out an existence, find a way to cope with your misery, or just get by. You want to have the abundant life Jesus spoke of when He said, \"I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly\" (John 10:10).\n\nWe don't want to be women who hear the truth but seldom act in faith to appropriate it for our lives. We don't want to be forever grappling with doubt, fear, insecurity, and uncertainty. We want to live life _on_ purpose and _with_ purpose. We find it boring to live like a baby, feeding only on milk. We want the solid food of God's truth so we can grow into a life that is exciting and productive.\n\nNone of us enjoys going around in circles, always passing through the same territory and coming back to the same problems, same frustrations, same mistakes, and same limitations. We don't want to become calloused, hard-hearted, bitter, unforgiving, anxious, impatient, hopeless, or unteachable. We don't want to end up with a negative attitude that says, \"My situation will never _be_ any different because it hasn't _been_ any different for a long time.\" We want to break out of any self-defeating cycle of repeated patterns and habits and be able to transcend ourselves, our limitations, and our circumstances. We want to be more than just a survivor.\n\nWe want to be an overcomer. We want to be a part of something greater than ourselves. We want to be connected to what God is doing on earth in a way that bears fruit for His kingdom. We want to have a sense of purpose in our lives. We want to abound in God's love and blessings. We want it all. All God has for us. But we can never achieve that quality of life outside the power of God. And then only as we pray.\n\n### How Do I Move in the Power of God?\n\nWe've all had times when we feel completely powerless in the face of our circumstances. We've proven to ourselves over and over that we don't have what it takes to attain any kind of permanent transformation in our lives. We know without a doubt that our best efforts to change ourselves or our circumstances in ways that are significant or lasting never work. We recognize our need for a power outside of and far greater than ourselves. But there is only one power in the world great enough to help us rise above ourselves and the difficult things we face. That is the power of God.\n\nWithout God's power, we can't transcend our limitations or get out of our rut. We can't stand strong in the face of all that opposes us. We are doomed to a life of spiritual mediocrity. Without the power of God's Holy Spirit working in us, we can't be liberated from everything that keeps us from moving into all God has for us.\n\nWe don't want to spend our lives waiting to be delivered from all that limits us and separates us from God's best. We want to be set free _now_. But that can't happen if we refuse to acknowledge the Holy Spirit's power. When we deny the Holy Spirit's attributes we become like those people the Bible speaks of who live \"having a form of godliness but denying its power\" (2 Timothy 3:5). We become professional Christians who talk \"Christianese\" with such a slick veneer of superficiality that it makes us untouchable and keeps us untouched. We become all show and no heart. All correctness and no love. All judgment and no mercy. All self-assurance and no humility. All talk and no tears. We live powerless and meaningless lives without any hope for real transformation. And without transformation, how can we ever rise above our limitations and be God's instrument to reach the world around us? And that is what life is all about.\n\nGod wants us to understand \"what is the exceeding greatness of His power toward us who believe\" (Ephesians 1:19). He wants us to know this power that raised Jesus \"from the dead and seated Him at His right hand in the heavenly places, far above all principality and power and might and dominion, and every name that is named\" (Ephesians 1:20-21). He wants us to understand that Jesus is not weak toward us, but mighty _in_ us (2 Corinthians 13:3). He wants us to understand that \"though He was crucified in weakness, yet He lives by the power of God,\" and even though we are also weak, we live by the power of God too (2 Corinthians 13:4). God wants us to see that \"we have received, not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, that we might know the things that have been freely given to us by God\" (1 Corinthians 2:12).\n\nI can't make you see or cause you to comprehend the power of God or the way the Holy Spirit wants to work in you. That is beyond my capabilities and authority in your life. But you don't need me to convince you because the Holy Spirit will do that Himself. Jesus said, \"the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, He will teach you all things\" (John 14:26). But you first have to acknowledge the Holy Spirit and invite Him to move in you freely.\n\nWe can only move in the power of God's Spirit if we have first received Jesus as Savior. You need to \"know the love of Christ which passes knowledge; that you may be filled with all the fullness of God\" (Ephesians 3:19). When you have Jesus as ruler of your life, you will come to know Him as the one \"who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us\" (Ephesians 3:20). Because of His Holy Spirit in us\u2014or His _power_ in us\u2014He can do more in our lives than we can even think to ask for. How great is that?\n\nBeing filled with the Holy Spirit is not something that happens against our will. It is something we have to be open to, something we must desire, something for which we have to ask. \"If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him!\" (Luke 11:13). We have a choice about whether we will be filled with the Holy Spirit or not. We have to ask God to do that.\n\nI am not going to get into the various doctrines of men about the Holy Spirit of God. There seem to be as many of these as there are denominations. All I am asking is that you recognize the Holy Spirit of God as the _power_ of God, and that you ask God to fill you with His Holy Spirit so He can empower you to move into all He has for you. The Bible says, \"be filled with the Spirit\" (Ephesians 5:18). Life works better when we do what the Bible says.\n\n### The Power to Become All God Made You to Be\n\nToday, more and more believing women are being given an open door to become all they were created to be. They are moving out in different areas of expertise and ministry and making an important difference in the lives of those whom God puts in their realm of influence. They are learning to rely on the power of God to prepare them and open the doors. They are also realizing that they are not just an afterthought in the order of God's creation, but they were created for a special purpose. They might not know exactly what that purpose is or all that it entails, but they know that it is to do good for others and glorify God.\n\nAn important reason more women are rising up to fulfill the destiny God has for them is because men are rising up to their place of spiritual authority and leadership. This is an answer to the prayers of countless women and something for which we must praise God. Women need this spiritual covering. When it's done right\u2014with strength, humility, kindness, respect, and understanding\u2014and not with abuse, arrogance, self-promotion, cruelty, harshness, or lovelessness, it becomes a place of safety for a woman. Being in right order in our lives is something to be desired.\n\nThe Bible says that \"the woman ought to have a symbol of authority on her head\" (1 Corinthians 11:10). This means spiritual authority, and it is very important. _Everyone_ is supposed to be submitted to divinely appointed authority. It's part of God's order. God won't pour into our lives all He has for us until we are in right relationship with the proper authority figures whom He has placed in our lives. They are there for our protection and benefit. God's power is too precious and too powerful to be let loose in an unsubmitted soul. (This is something to _pray_ about, not _worry_ about, so we'll do that in chapter 9.)\n\n### God's Promises to You\n\nSo often we don't move into all God has for us because we don't understand what it _is_ He has for us. We may know He has given many promises for our lives, but if we don't know _exactly_ what these promises are, we can't get a clear perspective on our situation. God's \"divine power has given to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of Him who called us by glory and virtue, by which have been given to us exceedingly great and precious promises, that through these you may be partakers of the divine nature\" (2 Peter 1:3-4).\n\nWe need to know these promises well enough to keep them perpetually in our minds and on our hearts. In fact, the _deeper_ they are etched in our souls the better off we will be. That's because the enemy of our soul will try to steal them from us. He doesn't want us to know the truth about ourselves. So we must grab on to these promises with all our might. We must cling to them like life and refuse to let them go.\n\nFor this reason, at the end of each chapter in this book there is a section called \"God's Promises to Me.\" In it I have listed important promises from God's Word that are applicable to that particular subject. I want us to declare these promises out loud in the face of all obstacles in order to erase any doubt about those priceless truths for our lives. As you read each one, determine what God's promise in that particular Scripture means specifically for you and your life. In some instances, determine what promise is _implied_ in that Scripture. Take for example the verse, \"Watch and pray, lest you enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak\" (Matthew 26:41). The implied promise here is that if you pray and are watchful, you won't fall into temptation.\n\nWhile most of God's promises are pleasant and positive, some are not because they are warnings to us. It's like saying to a child, \"If you do _this,_ there is this reward. But if you do _that_ , I _promise_ you there will be these unpleasant consequences.\" Because God keeps _all_ of His promises, it's important to know them well.\n\n### Time to Move On\n\nAlthough it may often feel like it, there is never a time when _nothing_ is happening in your life. That's because whether you realize it or not, you are never standing still. You are either going forward or you're sliding back. You are either becoming _more_ like Christ every day or you're becoming _less_ like Him. There is no neutral position in the Lord. And that is the very reason I wrote this book. I want you and me to keep moving forward. I don't want us to wake up one morning and realize we never laid a good foundation in the things of God or we didn't protect the foundation we had with prayer. I want us to move forward by spending quality time with the Lover of our soul every day. I want us to become _passionate_ about God. I want us to find out what we are supposed to be doing and then do it. This is not about getting things _from_ God, although He has much He wants to give to us. It's about getting _into_ God and allowing Him to get into _us_. It's about letting _Him_ make us complete.\n\nWhen we live this way, according to God's Word and by the power of His Holy Spirit, then we can trust that we are in the right place at the right time and that the Lord is working His perfect will in our lives. We can trust that He is moving us into the life of wholeness and blessing He has for us. Shall we get started?\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord,_ You have said in Your Word that whoever believes in You will have rivers of living water flowing from their heart (John 7:38). I believe in You, and I long for Your living water to flow in and through me today and every day that I'm alive. I invite Your Holy Spirit to fill me afresh right now. Just as a spring is constantly being renewed with fresh water so that it stays pure, I ask You to renew me in that same way today.\n\nYour Word says that \"the Spirit also helps in our weaknesses. For we do not know what we should pray for as we ought, but the Spirit Himself makes intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered\" (Romans 8:26). Lord, I realize I don't know how to pray as I need to, nor as often as I want to, but I invite You, Holy Spirit, to pray through me. Help me in my weakness. Teach me the things I don't know about You.\n\nI am desperately aware of how much I need Your power to transform me and my circumstances. I don't want to live an ineffective life. I want to live in the dynamic power of Your Spirit. I don't want to be a spiritual underachiever. I want to be an overcomer. You paid a price for me so that I could be owned by You. Help me to live like it. You planned out a course for my life so that I could be defined by You. Help me to act like it. You made it possible for me to defeat my enemy. Help me not to forget it. You sent Your Holy Spirit so that I could live in power. Help me to fulfill that promise. You gave Your life for me because You loved me. Help me to do the same for You.\n\nI put all my expectations in You, Lord. I repent of the times I have expected other people or other things to meet my needs when I should have been looking to You. I know that You are the only one who can complete me because You are everything I need. All that I have ever wanted in my life can be found in You. Help me to remember to live not in my own strength, but by the power of Your Spirit living in me. Forgive me for the times I have forgotten to do that. Enable me to grow in the things of Your kingdom so that I can become a whole, properly functioning, contributing, productive child of Yours who moves forward in Your purpose for my life.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nWe have this treasure in earthen vessels,  \nthat the excellence of the power may be of God and  \nnot of us.  \n **2 C ORINTHIANS 4:7**\n\nThe message of the cross is foolishness to those who  \nare perishing, but to us who are being saved it  \nis the power of God.  \n **1 C ORINTHIANS 1:18**\n\nMy grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is  \nmade perfect in weakness.  \n **2 C ORINTHIANS 12:9**\n\nGod both raised up the Lord and will also raise us up  \nby His power.  \n **1 C ORINTHIANS 6:14**\n\nWhen the Helper comes, whom I shall send to you  \nfrom the Father, the Spirit of truth who proceeds  \nfrom the Father, He will testify of Me.  \n **J OHN 15:26**\n\n* Lisa Bevere, _Kissed the Girls and Made Them Cry_ , (Nashville: Tommy Nelson, 2002), pp 189-90.\n\n##   CHAPTER ONE\n\n## [Lord, Draw Me into  \na Closer Walk with You](contents.html#rechapter01)\n\nBefore I came to know the Lord, I was involved in all kinds of occult practices and Eastern and New Age religions. I searched for God in each one of them, hoping to find some meaning or purpose for my life. I was desperate to find a way out of the emotional pain, fear, and depression I had experienced on a daily basis since I was a child. I thought there surely must be a God, and if I could just be good enough to get close to Him, perhaps something of His greatness would rub off on me, and then I could feel better about myself and my life.\n\nOf course I was never able to do that because the gods I chased after were distant, cold, and remote. And this depressed me all the more because I was raised by a mother who was distant, cold, and remote, not to mention abusive, frightening, and cruel. It was later determined that she was mentally ill, and I have since forgiven her for all that I suffered at her hand. Nevertheless, the memories of my childhood eventually snowballed into an avalanche of pain that became so unbearable that I ended up being suffocated by my own hopelessness and crushed into suicidal despair.\n\nBut it was here at the lowest point in my life, when I was 28 years old, that I learned who God really is and received Jesus as my Savior. This began a process of deliverance, healing, and restoration, the likes of which I had never dreamed possible.\n\nFrom the time I received the Lord and began to feel His life working _in_ me, I could see the common thread in all those _other_ religions and practices I had dabbled in previously. This similarity was that the gods of each of those religions had no power to save or transform a human life. But the God of the _Bible_ did. _He_ is the one, true, living God. And when we find _Him_ and receive _Him_ , His Spirit comes to dwell _in_ us. By the power of His spirit, He transforms us from the inside out and miraculously changes our circumstances and our lives.\n\nI also learned that He is a God who can be found. A God who can be known. A God who wants to be close to us. That's why He is called Immanuel, which means \"God _with_ us.\" But He draws close to _us_ as we draw close to _Him_ (James 4:8).\n\nIf I could sit down and talk with you in person about your life, I would tell you that if you have received the Lord, the answer to what you need is within you. That's because the Holy Spirit of God is within you, and He will lead you in all things and teach you everything you need to know. He will transform you and your circumstances beyond your wildest dreams if you will give up trying to do it on your own and let _Him_ do it _His_ way and in _His_ time.\n\nThis is not about striving to be good enough to get to God, for there is no way any of us can be. This is about letting all of the goodness of God be _in_ you. It's about drawing closer to God and sensing Him drawing closer to you. This is about an intimate walk with God and the wholeness that will be worked in you because of it.\n\n### I Know What You Want\n\nI traveled all over the United States speaking to women's groups during three of the last four years. Nearly everywhere I went in that period of time, I took a survey for a book I was writing called _The Power of a Praying \u00ae Husband_. I wanted to know how women most wanted to be prayed for. Their response was not surprising, but the fact that it was unanimous in every city and every state was amazing. The number one personal need of all women surveyed was that they would grow spiritually and have a deep, strong, vital, life-changing, faith-filled walk with God. I eventually stopped taking the survey because the results were always the same. I got the point!\n\nI'm sure that you, like me and many women, want a deep, intimate, loving relationship with God. You wouldn't be reading this book if you didn't. You long for the closeness, the connection, the affirmation that who you are is good and desirable. But God is the only one who can give all that to you all of the time. Your deepest needs and longing will only be met in an intimate relationship with Him. No person will ever reach as deeply into you as God will. No one can ever know you as well or love you as much. That insatiable longing for more that you feel, the emptiness you want those closest to you to fill, is put there by God so that _He_ can fill it.\n\nGod wants us to want Him. And when we realize that it's Him that we want, we become free. We are free to identify the longings, loneliness, and emptiness inside of us as our signal that we need to draw near to God with open arms and ask Him to fill us with more of Himself. But this deep and intimate relationship with God that we all desire and can't live without doesn't just happen. It must be sought after, prayed for, nurtured, and treasured. And we must _continually_ seek after, pray for, nurture, and treasure it.\n\n### Five Good Ways to Tell if Your Walk with God Is Shallow\n\n1. _If you follow the Lord for only what He can do for you,_ your walk with Him is shallow. If you love Him enough to ask Him what _you_ can do for _Him,_ then your relationship is growing deep.\n\n2. _If you only pray to God when things are tough or you need something,_ then your walk with Him is shallow. If you find yourself praying to Him many times a day just because you love to be in His presence, then your relationship is growing deep.\n\n3. _If you get mad at God or disappointed in Him when He doesn't do what you want,_ then your walk with Him is shallow. If you can praise God no matter what is going on in your life, then your relationship with Him is growing deep.\n\n4. _If you love God only because of what He does,_ then your walk with Him is shallow. If you love and reverence Him for who He _is_ , then your relationship with Him is growing deep.\n\n5. _If you think you have to beg God or twist His arm to get Him to answer your prayers,_ then your walk with Him is shallow. If you believe that God wants to answer the prayers you pray in line with His will, then your relationship with Him is growing deep.\n\n### Spending Time Alone with Him\n\nWe can never draw close to God and get to know Him well, or develop the kind of intimate relationship we want, unless we spend time alone with Him. It's in those private times that we are refreshed, strengthened, and rejuvenated. It's then we can see our lives from God's perspective and discover what is really important. That's where we understand who it is we belong to and believe in.\n\nGod has so much to speak into your life. But if you don't draw apart from the busyness of your day and spend time alone with Him in quietness and solitude, you will not hear it. Jesus Himself spent much time alone with God. If anyone could get away with not doing it, surely it would have been Him. How much more important must it be for us?\n\nI know finding time alone to pray can be difficult. Especially when the enemy of your soul doesn't want you to do that. But if you will make it a priority by setting a specific time to pray daily, perhaps writing it in your calendar the way you would any other important date, and determine to keep that standing appointment with God, you'll see answers to your prayers like never before.\n\nRemember, if you haven't been praying much, you can't expect things to change overnight. It takes a while to get the enormous ocean liner of your life turned around and headed in a different direction. It doesn't immediately reposition itself the moment you begin steering. In fact, you may hardly see any changes at first. It's the same way with prayer. Prayer can turn your life around, but it doesn't always happen the moment you utter your first words. It may take a time of continued prayer before you actually see the scenery change. This is normal, so don't give up. You will soon be heading full speed in a new direction. Far too often people give up just before their breakthrough into the realm of answered prayer. Remember, this trip is not a mini-vacation tour around the harbor, it's a lifelong voyage to meet your destiny. Giving up is not an option.\n\n### Naming Names\n\nDo you ever have trouble remembering names? I know I do. Especially when I meet a large number of people at one time. I can remember faces and names separately, but I don't always put the right ones together. And that can get me into trouble. With God it's a different situation. He has only one face, but many, many names. But if we don't know all of His names, we may not understand all the aspects of His character.\n\nGod has literally hundreds of names. Sometimes, though, it seems we often have trouble just remembering a few of the basic ones. We may forget one just when we need to remember it. For example, we may think of God as our heavenly _Father_ , but forget that He is also our _Husband_ and _Friend_. Or we may remember Him as our _Comforter_ , but forget that He is our _Deliverer_. We might think of Him as our _Protector_ , but fail to remember Him as our _Healer_. Some people never think of God beyond being their Savior, which in itself is more than we deserve. But God wants to be even more than that to us. He wants us to know all the aspects of His character because the way we recognize God will affect the way we live our lives.\n\nEach of God's names in the Bible represents a way He wants us to trust Him. Do you trust Him to be your _Strength_ (Psalm 18:1)? Is He your _Peace_ (Ephesians 2:14)? Is He the _Lifter of Your Head_ when you are down (Psalm 3:3)? Is He your _Refiner_ (Malachi 3:2-3)? Your _Wisdom_ (1 Corinthians 1:24)? Your _Counselor_ (Psalm 16:7)? Your _Resting Place_ (Jeremiah 50:6)? Each of His names is sacred, and we must treat each one as such.\n\nWhen I worked in the secular entertainment world in Los Angeles, I heard the word \"Jesus\" a hundred times a day, spoken as a curse word by people with no reverence, love, or understanding of Him. It wasn't until I received Jesus that I realized exactly how much of a curse word that name was when it was used profanely. Taking God's name in vain brings a curse on whoever uses it in that manner because it breaks one of the Ten Commandments. \"You shall not take the name of the LORD your God in vain, for the LORD will not hold him guiltless who takes His name in vain\" (Exodus 20:7). It also violates God's _greatest_ commandment, which is \"you shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength\" (Mark 12:30). No one who loves God uses His name in vain.\n\nHowever, this same word\u2014\"Jesus\"\u2014when spoken in love by one who reverences Him, has great power in it. Power to save, deliver, heal, provide, protect, and so much more. Using it profanely shuts off these very things from our lives. There is also great power in each one of God's names, and when spoken with faith, love, understanding, and reverence, it brings a blessing and increases your faith.\n\nFor example, God's name is always a safe place to run to any time you need help. \"The name of the LORD is a strong tower; the righteous run to it and are safe\" (Proverbs 18:10). If you are sick, run to your Healer. If you can't pay your bills, run to your Provider. If you are afraid, run to your Hiding Place. If you are going through a dark time, run to your Everlasting Light. By speaking His name with reverence and thanksgiving, you invite Him to be that to you. Often there is so much we don't have in our lives simply because we do not acknowledge God as the answer to that need. How can you be healed if you don't acknowledge God as the Healer?\n\nIn the following list of God's names, I have included only 30. But there are hundreds more in His Word. Though He is one God, there are so many dimensions to Him that in order for us to comprehend them all, He has given Himself many names. It's the only way we, who are so _small_ , can begin to understand Him, who is so _great_. I suggest that every time you come across another name for God in the Bible, underline it or jot it in the margin or add it to a list. It will remind you of who God wants to be to you. As you read the following list, invite God to be each one of these names to you in a new, real, and life-changing way.\n\n### Thirty Good Names to Call Your God\n\n1. _Healer_ (Psalm 103:3)\n\n2. _Redeemer_ (Isaiah 59:20)\n\n3. _Deliverer_ (Psalm 70:5)\n\n4. _My Strength_ (Psalm 43:2)\n\n5. _Shelter_ (Joel 3:16)\n\n6. _Friend_ (John 15:15)\n\n7. _Advocate_ (1 John 2:1)\n\n8. _Restorer_ (Psalm 23:3)\n\n9. _Everlasting Father_ (Isaiah 9:6)\n\n10. _Love_ (1 John 4:16)\n\n11. _Mediator_ (1 Timothy 2:5-6)\n\n12. _Stronghold_ (Nahum 1:7)\n\n13. _Bread of Life_ (John 6:35)\n\n14. _Hiding Place_ (Psalm 32:7)\n\n15. _Everlasting Light_ (Isaiah 60:20)\n\n16. _Strong Tower_ (Proverbs 18:10)\n\n17. _Resting Place_ (Jeremiah 50:6)\n\n18. _Spirit of Truth_ (John 16:13)\n\n19. _Refuge from the Storm_ (Isaiah 25:4)\n\n20. _Eternal Life_ (1 John 5:20)\n\n21. _The Lord Who Provides_ (Genesis 22:14)\n\n22. _Lord of Peace_ (2 Thessalonians 3:16)\n\n23. _Living Water_ (John 4:10)\n\n24. _My Shield_ (Psalm 144:2)\n\n25. _Husband_ (Isaiah 54:5)\n\n26. _Helper_ (Hebrews 13:6)\n\n27. _Wonderful Counselor_ (Isaiah 9:6)\n\n28. _The Lord Who Heals_ (Exodus 15:26)\n\n29. _Hope_ (Psalm 71:5)\n\n30. _God of Comfort_ (Romans 15:5)\n\nIf you will go through this list of names periodically and speak each of them out loud, thanking God for being that to you, you'll be amazed at how your faith will grow and how much closer to God you will feel.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , I draw close to You today, grateful that You will draw close to me as You have promised in Your Word (James 4:8). I long to dwell in Your presence, and my desire is for a deeper and more intimate relationship with You. I want to know You in every way You can be known. Teach me what I need to learn in order to know You better. I don't want to be a person who is \"always learning and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth\" (2 Timothy 3:7). I want to know the truth about who You are, because I know that You are near to all who call upon You in truth (Psalm 145:18).\n\nI am open to whatever You want to do in me. I don't want to limit You by neglecting to acknowledge You in every way possible. I declare this day that You are my Healer, my Deliverer, my Redeemer, and my Comforter. Today I especially need to know You as (put in a name of the Lord). I believe You will be that to me.\n\nGod, help me to set aside time each day to meet with You alone. Enable me to resist and eliminate all that would keep me from it. Teach me to pray the way You want me to. Help me to learn more about You. Lord, you have said, \"If anyone thirsts, let him come to Me and drink\" (John 7:37). I thirst for more of You because I am in a dry place without You. I come to You this day and drink deeply of Your Spirit.\n\nI know You are everywhere, but I also know that there are deeper manifestations of Your presence that I long to experience. Draw me close so that I may dwell in Your presence like never before.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nDraw near to God and He will draw near to you.  \n **J AMES 4:8**\n\nI will pray the Father, and He will give you another  \nHelper, that He may abide with you forever\u2014the  \nSpirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive,  \nbecause it neither sees Him nor knows Him;  \nbut you know Him, for He dwells with you  \nand will be in you.  \n **J OHN 14:16-17**\n\nIt is your Father's good pleasure to give you the  \nkingdom.  \n **L UKE 12:32**\n\nUntil now you have asked nothing in My name.  \nAsk, and you will receive, that your joy may be full.  \n **J OHN 16:24**\n\nLet us hold fast the confession of our hope without  \nwavering, for He who promised is faithful.  \n **H EBREWS 10:23**\n\n##   CHAPTER TWO\n\n## [Lord, Cleanse Me and  \nMake My Heart Right  \nBefore You](contents.html#rechapter02)\n\nBefore we go any further, let's get something straight. That is, you and I are not perfect. No one is perfect. None of us has arrived. None of us is incapable of sin. None of us is without problems. None of us have walked so long with the Lord that we know it all and therefore have nothing to learn. None of us is so complete that we don't need anything from God. None of us has it all together.\n\nThere! It's out in the open.\n\nPlease don't think I said this because I believe _you_ need to know it. To the contrary, I believe you already _do_ know it. I said it because I want you to know that we _all_ know it. We know it about ourselves and we know it about each other. Therefore, we can be completely honest with ourselves about ourselves.\n\nI don't want you to feel when reading this book that you have to live up to some impossibly high standard for your life. This book is not about living up to a standard. It's about letting _God_ become your standard. It's not about trying to make something happen for yourself. It's recognizing that you _can't_ make anything happen, but you _can_ surrender your life to God and let _Him_ make things happen. It's not about finding ways to avoid God's judgment and feeling like a failure if you don't do everything perfectly. It's about fully experiencing God's love and letting it perfect you. It's not about being somebody you are not. It's about becoming who you really are. But in order to see these things happen, you have to be completely honest with yourself and with God about who you are at the moment.\n\nWomen all over the world want to live fruitful lives. They want to dwell in God's grace while still obeying His laws. They want to be _unshakable_ in God's truth yet _moved_ by the suffering and needs of others. They want to know God in all the ways He can be known, and they want to be transformed by the power of His Spirit. But they are often hard on themselves when they don't see all these things happening on a daily basis. They are quick to observe all they are doing wrong and slow to appreciate all they are doing right.\n\nFor that reason, I want you to look upon this idea of cleansing your heart not as a judgment that your heart is dirty, but as God's call for you to get completely right before Him so He can bring all the blessings He has for you into your life. See it as God preparing you for the important work He has ahead for you to do.\n\nIn order to accomplish this, you have to examine your life closely. You have to be brave enough to say, \"Lord, show me what is in my heart, soul, mind, spirit, and life that shouldn't be there. Teach me what I am not understanding. Convict me where I am missing the mark. Tear down my arrogance, pride, fear, and insecurities, and help me to see the truth about myself, my life, and my circumstances. Expose me to myself, Lord. I can take it. Enable me to correct the error of my ways. Help me to replace lies with truth and make changes that last.\"\n\nIt takes courage to pray a prayer like that. Perhaps more courage than many of us have at the moment. If you are hesitant to let the Lord expose your heart because of what He might reveal, then ask Him to give you the courage you need. In order to see positive changes happen in your life, you have to be open to the cleansing and stretching work of the Holy Spirit. You have to allow Him to expose your heart so you won't be deceived about yourself and your life. You have to invite Him to create a clean heart within you. Then be willing to do these two things:\n\n1. _Confess_ to God any sins of thought or action that He shows you.\n\n2. _Repent_ of the things you have just confessed.\n\n### True Confession\n\nDon't think just because you are not a serial killer or have never robbed a bank that you don't have any sin to confess. Don't think because you have walked with the Lord for a number of years and go to church every Sunday morning and Wednesday night, and to all prayer meetings in between, that you have nothing for which you need to repent. Sin doesn't have to be glaring and obvious in order for it to be sin. For example, have you ever doubted that God can do what He promises in His Word? Doubt is a sin. Have you ever said anything about a person to someone else that isn't exactly flattering? Gossip is a sin. Have you ever avoided someone because you thought they might ask something of you that you didn't want to give? Selfishness is a sin. Have you ever had an unloving attitude toward another person? Whatever does not come from love is a sin.\n\nSin is hard to avoid 100 percent of the time. That's why confession is crucial. When we don't confess our sins, faults, or errors, they separate us from God. And we don't get our prayers answered. \"Your iniquities have separated you from your God; and your sins have hidden His face from you, so that He will not hear\" (Isaiah 59:2).\n\nWhen we don't confess our sins, we end up trying to hide ourselves from God. Just like Adam and Eve in the garden, we feel we can't face Him. But the problem with attempting to hide from God is that it's impossible. The Bible says that everything we do will be made known. Even the things we said and thought in secret. \"There is nothing covered that will not be revealed, nor hidden that will not be known. Therefore whatever you have spoken in the dark will be heard in the light, and what you have spoken in the ear in inner rooms will be proclaimed on the housetops\" (Luke 12:2-3). \"There is no creature hidden from His sight, but all things are naked and open to the eyes of Him to whom we must give account\" (Hebrews 4:13).\n\nWhat a frightening thought! If each of us will have to give an account, the quicker we get it straight with God the better. In fact, the sooner we deal with the sins we _can_ see, the sooner God can reveal to us the ones we _can't_. And God only knows how much of that there is residing in each of us.\n\nThere is always a consequence for sin. King David described it best when he wrote of his own unconfessed sin: \"When I kept silent, my bones grew old through my groaning all the day long. For day and night Your hand was heavy upon me; my vitality was turned into the drought of summer\" (Psalm 32:3-4).\n\nI remember having resentment toward my husband for words he said that hurt me deeply. As long as I held on to the hurt and resentment, it made me feel physically ill. I didn't want to confess it because I thought my feelings were justified and _he_ was the one who was wrong. But I finally realized that all sin is sin, so I confessed my resentment to God as sin\u2014and the moment I did, the feeling of sickness in my body left. \"There is no soundness in my flesh because of Your anger, nor any health in my bones because of my sin. For my iniquities have gone over my head; like a heavy burden they are too heavy for me. My wounds are foul and festering because of my foolishness\" (Psalm 38:3-5). Life is hard enough without us having to carry around old, dry, sick, weak bones.\n\nNothing is heavier than sin. We don't realize how heavy it is until the day we feel its crushing weight bringing death to our souls. We don't see how destructive it is until we smash into the wall that has gone up between us and God because of it. That's why it's best to confess every sin as soon as we are aware of it and get our hearts cleansed and right immediately. Confession gets sin out in the open before God. When you confess your sin, you're not informing God of something He doesn't know. He already knows. He wants to know that _you_ know.\n\nConfessing, however, is more than just apologizing. Anyone can do that. We all know people who are good apologizers. The reason they are so good at it is because they get so much practice. They have to say \"I'm sorry\" over and over again because they never change their ways. In fact, they sometimes say, \"I'm sorry\" without ever actually admitting to any fault. Those are the professional apologizers. And their confessions don't mean anything. But _true_ confession means admitting in full detail what you have done and then fully _repenting_ of it.\n\n### Full Repentance\n\nIt's one thing to recognize when you have done something that has violated God's laws; it's another to be saddened by it to such a degree that you are determined to never do it again. That's repentance. Repentance means to change your mind. To turn and walk the other way. Repentance means being so deeply sorry for what you have done that you will do whatever it takes to keep it from happening again. Confession means we _recognize_ we have done wrong and _admit_ our sin. Repentance means we are _sorry_ about our sin to the point of grief, and we have _turned_ and _walked away_ from it.\n\nRepenting of something doesn't necessarily mean we will never commit that sin again. It means we don't _intend_ to ever commit it again. So if you find that you have to confess the same sin again after you have only recently confessed and repented of it, then do it. Don't let the enemy saddle you with guilt and ride on your back shouting words of failure in your ear. Confess and repent as many times as necessary to throw him off and see yourself win the battle over this problem. Don't entertain thoughts such as, _Surely God won't forgive me again for the same thing I just confessed to Him last week._ He forgives _every time_ you confess sin before Him and fully repent of it. \"Blessed is he whose transgression is forgiven, whose sin is covered\" (Psalm 32:1). You can turn things around in your life when you turn to the Lord and repent.\n\nLearn to confess and repent quickly so that the death process that is set in motion each time we violate God's rules is not given time to do it's full damage, \"for the wages of sin is death\" (Romans 6:23). Ask God every day to show you where your heart is not clean and right before Him. Don't let anything separate you from all God has for you.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , I come humbly before You and ask You to cleanse my heart of every fault and renew a right spirit within me. Forgive me for thoughts I have had, words I have spoken, and things that I have done that are not glorifying to You or are in direct contradiction to Your commands. Specifically, I confess to You (name any thoughts, words, or actions that you know are not pleasing to God). I confess it as sin and I repent of it. I choose to walk away from this pattern of thought or action and live Your way. I know that You are \"gracious and merciful, slow to anger and of great kindness\" (Joel 2:13). Forgive me for ever taking that for granted.\n\nLord, I realize that You are a God who \"knows the secrets of the heart\" (Psalm 44:21). Reveal those to me if I am not seeing them. Show me any place in my life where I harbor sin in my thoughts, words, or actions that I have not recognized. Show me the truth about myself so that I can see it clearly. Examine my soul and expose my motives to reveal what I need to understand. I am willing to give up meaningless and unfruitful habits that are not Your best for my life. Enable me to make changes where I need to do so. Open my eyes to what I need to see so that I can confess all sin and repent of it. I want to cleanse my hands and purify my heart as You have commanded in Your Word (James 4:8).\n\nI pray that You will \"have mercy upon me, O God, according to Your lovingkindness; according to the multitude of Your tender mercies, blot out my transgressions. Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin\" (Psalm 51:1-2). Lord, \"create in me a clean heart . . . and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me away from Your presence, and do not take Your Holy Spirit from me\" (Psalm 51:10-11). \"Cleanse me from secret faults\" (Psalm 19:12). \"See if there is any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting\" (Psalm 139:24). Make me clean and right before You. I want to receive Your forgiveness so that times of refreshing may come from Your presence (Acts 3:19).\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nIf we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to  \nforgive us our sins and to cleanse us from  \nall unrighteousness.  \n **1 J OHN 1:9**\n\nBeloved, if our heart does not condemn us, we have  \nconfidence toward God. And whatever we ask we  \nreceive from Him, because we keep His  \ncommandments and do those things that  \nare pleasing in His sight.  \n **1 J OHN 3:21-22**\n\nI acknowledged my sin to You, and my iniquity I  \nhave not hidden. I said, \"I will confess my  \ntransgressions to the LORD,\" and You forgave the  \niniquity of my sin.  \n **P SALM 32:5**\n\nRepent therefore and be converted, that your sins  \nmay be blotted out, so that times of refreshing may  \ncome from the presence of the Lord.  \n **A CTS 3:19**\n\nHe who covers his sins will not prosper, but whoever  \nconfesses and forsakes them will have mercy.  \n **P ROVERBS 28:13**\n\n##   CHAPTER THREE\n\n## [Lord, Help Me to Be a  \nForgiving Person](contents.html#rechapter03)\n\nMy mother was abusive when I was growing up, but my father wasn't. When I became a Christian, forgiving my mother was the obvious thing to do. It wasn't until years later that God revealed my unforgiveness toward my dad. When a Christian counselor I was speaking with about the unrest and frustration in my soul asked me if I had any unforgiveness toward my dad, I said no. Why would I? He wasn't the abusive parent. But when the counselor told me to pray and ask God to show me the truth, a lifetime of rage, anger, hurt, unforgiveness, and tears flooded my entire being. Down deep I felt my dad never came to my rescue. He never rescued me from my mother's insanity. He never came and let me out of the closet she had locked me in for so much of my early childhood. I didn't realize how much I blamed him for allowing my mother, who he knew was severely mentally ill, to treat me with such cruelty and abuse. When I forgave him that day, I felt peace like I had never known before.\n\nOften we don't recognize the unforgiveness that is in us. We _think_ we are forgiving, but we really aren't. If we don't ask God to reveal our unforgiveness to us, we may never get free of the paralyzing grip it has on our lives. A big part of making sure our lives are clean and right before God has to do with forgiving other people. We can never move into all God has for us unless we do.\n\n### An Excellent Choice\n\nI know \"hate\" is a very strong word, and we hate to use the word \"hate\" about anything. And we certainly hate the thought that we might actually have hate for another person. But that's what unforgiveness is\u2014the root of hate. When we entertain unforgiving thoughts, they turn to hate inside of us. Jesus felt so strongly about this that He said, \"Whoever hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him\" (1 John 3:15). He also said, \"Whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, that your Father in heaven may also forgive you your trespasses\" (Mark 11:25).\n\nNow let's get this straight. When we don't forgive, we are considered murderers without any eternal hope who shouldn't expect God to forgive us until we have forgiven others. I'd say that if it's between _forgiving_ and _not forgiving_ , forgiving seems like the better choice.\n\nWhen we choose not to forgive, we end up walking in the dark (1 John 2:9-11). Because we can't see clearly, we stumble around in confusion. This throws our judgment off and we make mistakes. We become weak, sick, and bitter. Other people notice all this because unforgiveness shows in the face, words, and actions of those who have it. They see it, even if they can't specifically identify what it is, and they don't feel comfortable around it. When we choose to forgive, not only do _we_ benefit, but so do the people around us.\n\n### Family First\n\nIt's very easy to have unforgiveness toward family members because they are with us the most, know us the best, and can hurt us the deepest. But for those very same reasons, unforgiveness toward one of them will bring the greatest devastation to our lives. That's why forgiveness must start at home.\n\nFirst of all, it is very important to make sure you have forgiven your parents. The Bible is crystal clear about this issue. The fifth of the Ten Commandments says, \"Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long upon the land which the LORD your God is giving you\" (Exodus 20:12). If you don't honor them it will shorten your life. And you can't fully honor them if you haven't forgiven them.\n\nWhen I made the decision to forgive my mother, I did it because I wanted to obey God and move into all He had for me. It must have worked because look how old I am. But forgiving her once did not mean that I never had to worry about it again. There were layers and layers of unforgiveness that had built up in me over the years, and I found I had to forgive her every time one of them surfaced. Actually, I had to forgive her every time I saw her because she only became worse as the years went on.\n\nJust because we confess our unforgiveness toward someone one day doesn't mean we won't have unforgiveness in us the next. That's why forgiveness is a choice we must make _every_ day. We _choose_ to forgive whether we feel like it or not. It's a decision, not a feeling. If we wait for good feelings, we could end up waiting a lifetime. If we have any bitterness or unforgiveness, it's always our fault for not choosing to let it go. It's our responsibility to confess it to God and ask Him to help us forgive and move on with our lives.\n\nWe also need to ask God to show us if we have any other family members we need to forgive. We don't tend to think of ourselves as unforgiving people. Irritated maybe, but not unforgiving. But we have to remember that our standards are much lower than God's, and therefore we often don't see where we need to forgive. Ask God to reveal any unforgiveness you have toward a family member. You are going to be miserable until you get it resolved.\n\n### When You Can't Forgive\n\nForgiveness is never easy. But sometimes it feels downright impossible in light of the devastating and horrendous pain we have suffered. If you have a hard time forgiving someone, ask God to help you. That's what I did regarding my mother, and by the time she died, I had absolutely no hard feelings toward her. If you can think of someone whom you find it hard to forgive, ask God to give you a heart of forgiveness for them. Pray for them in all the ways you can think of to pray. It's amazing how God softens our hearts when we pray for people. Our anger, resentment, and hurt turn into love.\n\nDon't worry, however. When we forgive someone, it doesn't make them right or justify what they have done. It releases them into God's hands so _He_ can deal with them. Forgiveness is actually the best revenge because it not only sets us free from the person we forgive, but it frees us to move into all God has for us. Our forgiving someone doesn't depend on them admitting guilt or apologizing. If it did, most of us would never be able to do it. We can forgive no matter what the other person does.\n\nSometimes incidents happen in our lives that are so devastating we can go for years without realizing the depth of the bitterness we have because of it. Sometimes we don't forgive _ourselves_ for things we've done, and so we give ourselves a lifetime of punishment for whatever we did or did not do. Sometimes we blame God for things that have happened. Ask God to show you if any of these things are true about you. Don't let unforgiveness limit what God wants to do in your life.\n\n### Whatever It Takes\n\nFour hundred and ninety times! That's how many times we have to forgive a person. Peter asked Jesus, \"Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seven times?\" Jesus said to him, \"I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven\" (Matthew 18:21-22). You may be able to think of someone you have to forgive 490 times a _day_ , but the point is that God wants you to forgive as many times as it takes. He wants you to be a forgiving person.\n\nJesus told the story of a man who was released from a large debt by his master. But he turned right around and made his own poor servant go to prison for not paying _him_ a small debt. When the master heard about this he said, \"I forgave you all that debt because you begged me. Should you not also have had compassion on your fellow servant, just as I had pity on you?\" The master was so angry that he delivered that man to the torturers until he paid all that was due to him. Jesus said, \"So My heavenly Father also will do to you if each of you, from his heart, does not forgive his brother his trespasses\" (Matthew 18:32-35).\n\nThis is very serious. We who have received Jesus have been forgiven a _large_ debt. We have no right to be unforgiving of others. God says, \"Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God in Christ forgave you\" (Ephesians 4:32). If we don't forgive, we will be imprisoned by our hatred and tortured by our bitterness.\n\nEverything we do in life that has eternal value hinges on two things: loving God and loving others. It's far easier to love God than it is to love others, but God sees them as being the same. One of the most loving things we can do is forgive. It's hard to forgive those who have hurt, offended, or mistreated us. But God wants us to love even our enemies. And in the process of doing so, He perfects us (Matthew 5:48). It's always going to be easy to find things to be unforgiving about. We have to stop looking.\n\nGod wants you to move into all He has for you. But if you don't forgive, you get stuck where you are and shut off God's work in your life. Forgiveness opens your heart and mind and allows the Holy Spirit to work freely in you. It releases you to love God more and feel His love in greater measure. Life is worth nothing without that.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , help me to be a forgiving person. Show me where I am not. Expose the recesses of my soul so I won't be locked up by unforgiveness and jeopardize my future. If I have any anger, bitterness, resentment, or unforgiveness that I am not recognizing, reveal it to me and I will confess it to You as sin. Specifically, I ask You to help me fully forgive (name anyone you feel you need to forgive). Make me to understand the depth of Your forgiveness toward me so that I won't hold back forgiveness from others. I realize that my forgiving someone doesn't make them right; it makes me free. I also realize that You are the only one who knows the whole story, and You will see justice done.\n\nHelp me to forgive myself for the times I have failed. And if I have blamed You for things that have happened in my life, show me so I can confess it before You. Enable me to love my enemies as You have commanded in Your Word. Teach me to bless those who curse me and persecute me (Matthew 5:44-45). Remind me to pray for those who hurt or offend me so that my heart will be soft toward them. I don't want to become hard and bitter because of unforgiveness. Make me a person who is quick to forgive.\n\nLord, show me if I have any unforgiveness toward my mother or father for anything they did or did not do. I don't want to shorten my life by not honoring them and breaking this great commandment. And where there is distance between me and any other family member because of unforgiveness, I pray You would break down that wall. Help me to forgive every time I need to do so. Where I can be an instrument of reconciliation between other family members who have broken or strained relationships, enable me to do that.\n\nI don't want anything to come between You and me, Lord, and I don't want my prayers to be hindered because I have entertained sin in my heart. I choose this day to forgive everyone and everything, and walk free from the death that unforgiveness brings. If any person has unforgiveness toward me, I pray You would soften their heart to forgive me and show me what I can do to help resolve this issue between us. I know that I cannot be a light to others as long as I am walking in the darkness of unforgiveness. I choose to walk in the light as You are in the light and be cleansed from all sin (1 John 1:7).\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nJudge not, and you shall not be judged. Condemn  \nnot, and you shall not be condemned. Forgive,  \nand you will be forgiven.  \n **L UKE 6:37**\n\nThe discretion of a man makes him slow to anger,  \nand his glory is to overlook a transgression.  \n **P ROVERBS 19:11**\n\nLove your enemies, bless those who curse you, do  \ngood to those who hate you, and pray for those who  \nspitefully use you and persecute you, that you may be  \nsons of your Father in heaven.  \n **M ATTHEW 5:44-45**\n\nHe who hates his brother is in darkness and walks in  \ndarkness, and does not know where he is going,  \nbecause the darkness has blinded his eyes.  \n **1 J OHN 2:11**\n\nIf you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father  \nwill also forgive you. But if you do not forgive  \nmen their trespasses, neither will your Father  \nforgive your trespasses.  \n **M ATTHEW 6:14-15**\n\n##   CHAPTER FOUR\n\n## [Lord, Teach Me to Walk in  \nObedience to Your Ways](contents.html#rechapter04)\n\nI remember when I was in high school and had to take a required swimming class one semester. I hated it because it was at 7:30 every morning and my hair was ruined for the rest of the day. (There weren't any portable hair dryers back then, if you can even imagine such primitive times.) We had to swim daily, rain or shine, and it could get quite cold on those foggy California winter mornings. The only way I could be excused from swimming was if I were dying, and even then I had to have a note from the doctor.\n\nIn spite of the misery of that experience, I loved swimming and I became fairly good at it. I learned that if I was positioned correctly and did all the right moves, I could go forward quickly in the water. It became a smooth maneuver that would get me speedily to the other side of the giant pool. And nothing would make me falter\u2014not even turbulence from other swimmers on either side of me.\n\nThe same principle is true for us. If we want to successfully navigate the waters of our lives, we must position ourselves correctly and learn all the right moves. If we don't, when we come to turbulent situations we will not be able to navigate through them. We will end up flailing around and exhausting ourselves just trying to stay afloat. And we will never actually get anywhere.\n\nBut when we position ourselves under the headship of Christ and learn to do what He requires of us, there is a flow of the Holy Spirit that will carry us wherever we need to go.\n\n### All the Right Moves\n\nThe way we learn what God expects of us is by reading His Word. We can't begin to make the right moves if we don't know what they are. And we can study all we want in this holy manual of life and learn everything we are supposed to do, but at some point we still have to jump in the water. The proof of our sincerity is in the _doing_ , not just the knowing. It's one thing to make a list of do's and don'ts, but it's quite another to have a heart for God's ways and a soul that longs to live them out. It's one thing to read about life, it's another to live it. Obedience is something you _do;_ having a heart to obey is something you _pray_ about.\n\n### God, Help Me Be Disciplined\n\nI hear this plea from women all over the world. We know a lot about what we're _supposed_ to be doing, but we often have a hard time _doing_ it. We must pray that God will enable us to be disciplined enough to do what we need to do.\n\nI am a fairly disciplined person for the most part. But I wasn't always that way. There was a time in my life when I was the exact opposite. I was plagued with depression. And, as many of you who have been depressed know, you can't think clearly or organize your life well when you are struggling to find a reason to live. You are unable to do the things that are good for you because you don't know if you're worth it. You don't move forward in your life because it takes all your energy just to survive each day.\n\nWhen I started learning to pray about every aspect of my life, I asked God to help me be disciplined enough to be daily in His Word, to pray faithfully, and to take the steps of obedience I needed to take. I asked Him to deliver me from depression and anything else that kept me from all He had for me. I was surprised at how quickly God answered those prayers. I have become disciplined, organized, and obedient beyond what I believe are my natural capabilities. I am still learning new levels of obedience, however, even after 32 years of walking with God. My body is getting older, but as a result of obeying God in new ways, my spirit is being renewed with each passing year. And with each new step of obedience I take, I experience new blessings and new freedoms I have not known before and never thought possible.\n\nDon't fall into the trap of thinking that once you are saved you don't have to put forth any effort. That's like getting married and never taking a shower again. You might be able to get away with it for a while, but it's risky business and your quality of life will definitely suffer. Learning obedience is a lifelong process. There are always new dimensions of it to conquer. Even if you have walked with the Lord for 40 years, you still need to ask God to show you any area where you are not being obedient. _We get into trouble when we think we_ know _what to do and we stop asking God if we're_ doing _it_. \"We must give the more earnest heed to the things we have heard, lest we drift away\" (Hebrews 2:1).\n\nWe can never get prideful about how perfectly we are obeying God because He is continually stretching us and asking us to move into new levels of growth. Nor can we go to the other extreme, saying, \"This is just the kind of person I am\u2014undisciplined and unteachable.\" We have no excuse for not doing what we need to do when God says He will _enable_ us to do it if we will just call upon Him for help. All we have to say is, \"Lord, help me to be disciplined enough to obey You the way You want me to so I can become the person You created me to be.\" Without the perfecting, balancing, refining work of His Holy Spirit, the freedom you have in Christ will turn into a license to do anything you want.\n\n### Personal Obedience\n\nIn addition to the rules we all have to obey, there are specific things God asks each of us to do as individuals in order to move us into the purpose He has for our lives. These are different for each person. For example, eight years ago God instructed my husband and me to move from California to Tennessee. This was not something I wanted to do nor did the thought of doing that ever enter my mind. I was happy where I was and didn't want to leave. But because it was a clear directive from God, we packed up and obeyed. The reasons why we moved have become increasingly evident over the years, and I am so grateful we heard God's directive and followed it. But we probably wouldn't have heard if we hadn't actually said the words, \"Lord, show us what we are supposed to be doing.\"\n\nIt's important that you keep asking God to show you what He wants _you_ to do. If you don't ask, you won't know. It's that simple. For example, God may ask you to take a different job, stop a certain activity, join a certain church, or change the way you've always done something. Whatever He asks you to do, remember He does this for your greatest blessing. But you must understand that you may not hear Him speaking to you at all if you are not taking the other steps of obedience He expects all of us to take that are found in His word. \"One who turns away his ear from hearing the law, even his prayer is an abomination\" (Proverbs 28:9). It doesn't hurt to ask.\n\n### Doing Things You'd Rather Not\n\nWe all have to do things we don't want to do. In even the most wonderful of jobs, there are still aspects of it that we don't enjoy. But part of being successful in life means doing things we would rather not. When we do things we don't like simply because we know we need to do them, it builds character in us. It makes us disciplined. It forms us into a leader God can trust. And there is always a price to pay when we forsake the things we _need_ to do in order to do only the things we _feel_ like doing. We must be willing to make sacrifices for the blessings we want.\n\nWhen you find it difficult to do what you _know_ you need to, ask the Holy Spirit to help you. Of course, you still have to take the first step, no matter how daunting, intimidating, dreadful, uncomfortable, or distasteful. But when you do, the Holy Spirit will assist you the rest of the way. \"I will put My Spirit within you and cause you to walk in My statutes, and you will keep My judgments and do them\" (Ezekiel 36:27).\n\n### Ten Good Reasons to Obey God\n\nThere are countless reasons to obey God, but there is one primary reason: He said to. If there were no other reason, that would certainly be enough. However, there are many important benefits that you and I should be reminded of regularly, and below I've listed ten good ones.\n\n1. _We get our prayers heard_. \"If I regard iniquity in my heart, the Lord will not hear. But certainly God has heard me; He has attended to the voice of my prayer\" (Psalm 66:18-19).\n\n2. _We enjoy a deeper sense of the Lord's presence_. \"If anyone loves Me, he will keep My word; and My Father will love him, and We will come to him and make Our home with him\" (John 14:23).\n\n3. _We gain wisdom_. \"He stores up sound wisdom for the upright; He is a shield to those who walk uprightly\" (Proverbs 2:7).\n\n_4. We have God's friendship_. \"You are my friends if you do whatever I command you\" (John 15:14).\n\n5. _We can live safely_. \"You shall observe My statutes and keep My judgments, and perform them; and you will dwell in the land in safety\" (Leviticus 25:18).\n\n6. _We are perfected_. \"Whoever keeps His word, truly the love of God is perfected in Him. By this we know that we are in Him\" (1 John 2:5).\n\n7. _We are blessed_. \"Behold, I set before you today a blessing and a curse: the blessing, if you obey the commandments of the LORD your God which I command you today\" (Deuteronomy 11:26-27).\n\n8. _We find happiness_. \"Happy is he who keeps the law\" (Proverbs 29:18).\n\n9. _We have peace_. \"Mark the blameless man, and observe the upright; for the future of that man is peace\" (Psalm 37:36).\n\n10. _We have a long life_. \"My son, do not forget my law, but let your heart keep my commands; for length of days and long life and peace they will add to you\" (Proverbs 3:1-2).\n\n### A Stepping-Stone to Destiny\n\nGod has great plans for you. He has important things He wants you to do. And He is preparing you for your destiny right now. But you have to take steps of obedience in order to get there. And you have to trust that He knows the way and won't hurt you in the process.\n\nGod's rules are for our benefit, not to make us miserable. When we live by them, life works. When we don't, life falls apart. When we obey, we have clarity. When we don't, we have confusion. And there is a definite connection between obedience and the love of God. Even though God loves us, we won't sense His love if we are walking in disobedience to His ways.\n\nThere is also a direct connection between obedience and getting your prayers answered (1 John 3:22). If you have been frustrated because you don't see answers to your prayers, ask God if it is because of disobedience. Say, \"Lord, is there any area of my life where I am not obeying You?\" Don't keep telling God what _you_ want without asking Him what _He_ wants.\n\nYou never know when you will step into the moment for which God has been preparing you. And it is not just one moment; it's many successive ones. It doesn't matter whether you are a single career woman or a married lady with nine children under the age of ten, it doesn't matter whether you are nineteen or ninety, God is preparing you daily for something great. He wants you to be willing to let Him purify you, fortify you, and grow you up in Him. But you have to play by the rules. \"If anyone competes in athletics, he is not crowned unless he competes according to the rules\" (2 Timothy 2:5). You can't swim into the mainstream of those moments successfully if you are not doing all the right moves now.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , Your Word says that those of us who love Your law will have great peace and nothing will cause us to stumble (Psalm 119:165). I love Your law because I know it is good and it is there for my benefit. Enable me to live in obedience to each part of it so that I will not stumble and fall. Help me to obey You so that I can dwell in the confidence and peace of knowing I am living Your way.\n\nMy heart wants to obey You in _all_ things, Lord. Show me where I am not doing that. If there are steps of obedience I need to take that I don't understand, I pray You would open my eyes to see the truth and help me to take those steps. I know I can't do all things right without Your help, so I ask that You would enable me to live in obedience to Your ways. \"With my whole heart I have sought You; oh, let me not wander from Your commandments!\" (Psalm 119:10).\n\nYour Word says that \"if we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us\" (1 John 1:8). I don't want to deceive myself by not asking You where I am missing the mark You have set for my life. Reveal to me when I am _not_ doing things I _should_ be doing. Show me if I'm doing things I should not. Help me to hear Your specific instructions to me. Speak to me clearly through Your Word so I will know what's right and what's wrong. I don't want to grieve the Holy Spirit in anything I do (Ephesians 4:30). Help me to be ever learning about Your ways so I can live in the fullness of Your presence and move into all You have for me.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nWhatever we ask we receive from Him, because we  \nkeep His commandments and do those things that  \nare pleasing in His sight.  \n **1 J OHN 3:22**\n\nFor the LORD God is a sun and shield; the LORD will  \ngive grace and glory; no good thing will He withhold  \nfrom those who walk uprightly.  \n **P SALM 84:11**\n\nHe who keeps His commandments abides in Him,  \nand He in him. And by this we know that He abides  \nin us, by the Spirit whom He has given us.  \n **1 J OHN 3:24**\n\nBlessed are those who hear the word of  \nGod and keep it!  \n **L UKE 11:28**\n\nHe who has My commandments and keeps them, it  \nis he who loves Me. And he who loves Me will  \nbe loved by My Father, and I will love him  \nand manifest Myself to him.  \n **J OHN 14:21**\n\n##   CHAPTER FIVE\n\n## [Lord, Strengthen Me to  \nStand Against the Enemy](contents.html#rechapter05)\n\nWhen an unthinkable tragedy burst upon our nation on September 11 in New York City, many people asked, \"Why did this happen?\" In their unbearable grief and shock they wanted an answer. There are many answers to that question, but the main one is this: We have an enemy. I don't mean just we the people of New York or we the people of the United States. I mean we the people who stand for the things of God. There is an enemy who opposes all that God is and everything He does and anyone who believes in Him or tries to live His way.\n\nWe all have an enemy who is like a terrorist to our soul. If we don't realize this, it will be easy for him to manipulate us. Of course, he is not omniscient nor omnipresent\u2014he can't be everywhere and know our every thought\u2014but if we don't fully realize that he is a limited and defeated foe, then we will be harassed by him continually. One of the things Jesus accomplished when He died and rose again was to break the power of the enemy. When He defeated the enemy on the cross, He gave us authority over him. He said, \"I give you the authority . . . over all the power of the enemy, and nothing shall by any means hurt you\" (Luke 10:19).\n\nWe are all involved in a spiritual battle with an enemy who will never let up. Even though it is people who do evil things to us, we have to keep in mind that it is our ultimate enemy, the devil, who is behind it. \"For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places\" (Ephesians 6:12). Even when we are being attacked by a person, recognizing who our real enemy is will be the first step in standing strong against him.\n\nJust as God has a plan for you, so does Satan. Satan's plan is to steal from you and destroy your life. \"The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy\" (John 10:10). He disguises himself so that he doesn't look threatening, and he lulls you into thinking that you are not in any danger (2 Corinthians 11:14). But he never takes a day off. He is constantly trying to see his plan for your life fulfilled. That's why you have to \"be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour\" (1 Peter 5:8).\n\nFor the most part, we are able to recognize obvious attacks of the enemy. But the more subtle ones, when we are being seduced into accepting something into our lives that will ultimately get us off track or destroy us, are harder to recognize. For example, he will attempt to make you believe you deserve every bad thing that happens to you. But deserving is not the issue with God. We didn't deserve to have Jesus die for us. Yet He did. The point is not whether we deserve the things the devil throws our way. The point is Jesus died so we don't have to experience them. Ask God to help you discern the enemy's work in your life. Then \"resist the devil and he will flee from you\" (James 4:7).\n\n### Five Good Weapons Against Mass Destruction\n\nGod has given us many weapons to use against the enemy's plan for our destruction. Here are the top five:\n\n1. _A powerful weapon against the enemy is God's Word._ This is _the most_ powerful weapon. Jesus Himself used it against the devil when He was led into the wilderness by the Holy Spirit and Satan came to tempt Him (Matthew 4:1). One would think that if you were the Son of God you wouldn't have to go into the wilderness at all, let alone to be tempted by the devil. But \"the tempter came to Him\" the way he comes to all of us, and Jesus used the Word of God to refute him. He said, \"Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God\" (Matthew 4:4). When the devil tries to destroy your life, refute him with God's Word. \"A prudent man foresees evil and hides himself; the simple pass on and are punished\" (Proverbs 27:12). The moment you identify evil working in your midst, hide yourself in the Word of God.\n\n2. _A powerful weapon against the enemy is praise_. The devil hates it every time we worship God. That's because he can't tolerate people worshiping anyone else but him. He detests it so much he can't even be around it. When we praise and worship God, His presence dwells powerfully in our midst and the devil has to leave.\n\n3. _A powerful weapon against the enemy is obedience_. If we are living in sin or walking in disobedience in any way, this leaves the door open in our lives for the devil to gain a point of entry and ultimately a foothold. Bad things happen to us that might be the enemy's work, but it could also be because our own sin has given him a place to erect a stronghold in our life. Satan does not have jurisdiction over you, but disobedience to the laws of God opens the door and puts out a welcome mat for him. Confession and repentance will shut the door in his face.\n\n4. _A powerful weapon against the enemy is faith._ Keep in mind that the enemy is always planting land mines out ahead of you. You have no idea where they are because they are not visible to the human eye. The way to avoid them is to walk closely with God and let Him guide your steps. That takes faith. \"Resist him, steadfast in the faith, knowing that the same sufferings are experienced by your brotherhood in the world\" (1 Peter 5:8-9). Walking in faith is a powerful way to avoid the enemy's trap.\n\n5. _A powerful weapon against the enemy is prayer and fasting._ Prayer is a strong weapon against the enemy. Fasting makes it even more so. Often the hold of the enemy upon our lives can only be broken by prayer and fasting. It doesn't seem as though such a simple thing could do so much, but it does. And it might not seem as though anything is happening while you fast, but there are powerful things being broken in the spirit realm. Often just a simple 24-hour fast is enough to break the hold of the enemy upon our lives. Regular fasts will keep evil at bay and strongholds broken down. It's a way of saying, \"I deny myself what I want most and put God first in my life.\" The enemy hates that because he knows it's a sure way of resisting and defeating him.\n\n### I'm a Good Person, so Why Is He Attacking Me?\n\nMany people have asked this question, but the question answers itself. The enemy attacks you _because_ you are a good person. The devil will always attack anyone who loves God and lives His way. In fact, this is the main criteria for his enmity against you. The only way you could get him to not do that is to become like him. You would have to stand for what he represents. As long as you have a heart for the things of God, you are his target.\n\nKeep in mind that the greater your commitment is to the Lord, the more the devil will try to harass you. That's why if you are moving into a deeper level of commitment to God, or coming into a new time of deliverance and freedom, or entering into new ministry or work God is opening up for you, you can depend on your enemy trying to stop it. He will do all he can to wear you down with discouragement, sickness, confusion, guilt, strife, fear, depression, or defeat. He may try to threaten your mind, your emotions, your health, your work, your family, or your relationships. He will try to get you to give up. Even though he is not close to being as powerful as God, he attempts to make you think otherwise. He will try to gain a point of rule in your life through deception. He will try to blind you to the truth and get you to believe his lies. He will try to convince you he is winning the battle, but the truth is that he has already lost.\n\nThis is the deal. The devil has come to steal, kill, and destroy. Jesus has come to give you life abundantly. Hmm. Let's see. Death and destruction from Satan. Life and abundance from Jesus. Does that mean if you're not living a life of abundance then the devil must be robbing you? I think that's a good possibility, especially since this is his life goal. The only other possibility is that you have not truly aligned yourself with God and are not living His way. Ask God to show you the truth about your situation. Don't let the enemy of your soul talk you into accepting anything less than what God has for you.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , I thank You for suffering and dying on the cross for me, and for rising again to defeat death and hell. My enemy is defeated because of what You have done. Thank You that You have given me all authority over him (Luke 10:19). By the power of Your Holy Spirit I can successfully resist the devil and he must flee from me (James 4:7). Show me when I am not recognizing the encroachment of the enemy in my life. Teach me to use that authority You have given me to see him defeated in every area.\n\nReveal to me any place in my life where I am walking in disobedience. If I have given the enemy a place in my protective armor through which he can secure a hook, show me so I can rectify it. Gird me with strong faith in You and in Your Word. Help me to fast and pray regularly in order to break any stronghold the enemy is trying to erect in my life.\n\nLord, I know that in the midst of the battle I don't have to be fainthearted. I don't have to be afraid in the face of the enemy (Deuteronomy 20:3). Thank You that even though the enemy tries to take me captive to do his will, You have given me the power to escape his snares completely (2 Timothy 2:26). Thank You that You have delivered me from him (Psalm 18:17) and You are my shield because I live Your way (Proverbs 2:7). Help me to \"not be overcome by evil,\" but instead give me the strength to \"overcome evil with good\" (Romans 12:21). Hide me in the secret place of Your presence from the plots of evil men (Psalm 31:20). Thank You that I will never be brought down by the enemy as long as I stand strong in You.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nThe Lord is faithful, who will establish you and  \nguard you from the evil one.  \n **2 T HESSALONIANS 3:3**\n\nTake up the whole armor of God, that you may be  \nable to withstand in the evil day, and having done  \nall, to stand. Stand therefore, having girded your  \nwaist with truth, having put on the breastplate of  \nrighteousness, and having shod your feet with the  \npreparation of the gospel of peace; above all, taking  \nthe shield of faith with which you will be able to  \nquench all the fiery darts of the wicked one. And  \ntake the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the  \nSpirit, which is the word of God; praying always with  \nall prayer and supplication in the Spirit, being  \nwatchful to this end with all perseverance and  \nsupplication for all the saints.  \n **E PHESIANS 6:13-18**\n\nWhen the whirlwind passes by, the wicked is  \nno more, but the righteous has an  \neverlasting foundation.  \n **P ROVERBS 10:25**\n\nBe strong in the Lord and in the power of His might.  \nPut on the whole armor of God, that you may be  \nable to stand against the wiles of the devil.  \n **E PHESIANS 6:10-11**\n\n##   CHAPTER SIX\n\n## [Lord, Show Me How to Take  \nControl of My Mind](contents.html#rechapter06)\n\nI remember one particular Friday afternoon when my husband was out of town on a trip and my children were each spending the night at a friend's house. With everyone away it was a rare opportunity for me to have some quiet time and get a lot of writing done.\n\nMuch to my surprise, however, I felt tremendous loneliness and sadness after they left. I thought about everything that was wrong with my life, and it made me hopelessly depressed. It was so bad I couldn't think about anything else. These thoughts paralyzed me to such a degree that I wasn't able to call anyone, go anywhere, catch up on mail, or do any work around the house. And, of course, I didn't get any writing done. I just sat crying in my room with the Bible open on my lap.\n\n\"Lord, show me what's the matter with me and what I should do about it,\" I prayed. \"I am going to fast until I hear from You or this thing breaks.\"\n\nI fasted through Saturday and into the night. About 4:00 Sunday morning I awoke with deep anxiety in my soul. I got up and began reading my Bible. When my eyes fell upon the words in Isaiah about exchanging \"the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness\" (Isaiah 61:3), I knew in that instant I was dealing with a spirit of heaviness. There was nothing wrong with me or my life, but the enemy was trying to get me to believe there was.\n\nFor the next 20 minutes I sang praises to God and spoke His Word out loud. I told the enemy to get away from me, and I thanked the Lord for giving me the authority to do that. Then, as clearly as I have ever felt anything, I sensed the dark, heavy blanket of spiritual oppression lift. It lifted so suddenly and completely that I realized I had been dealing with a direct and specific attack from the enemy.\n\nAs I look back, I believe it was because I was in the middle of writing _The Power of a Praying \u00ae Wife_ and the enemy was trying to make me give up. But the opposite happened. In the days ahead I had new vision for my life and my future, and a renewed commitment to identifying and resisting the enemy's lies. I realized I should have caught his lies the minute they entered my mind instead of entertaining them as truth.\n\n### Take Control\n\nA big part of standing against the enemy of our souls is taking control over our minds. As the Bible says, we must learn to bring every thought into captivity (2 Corinthians 10:5).\n\nIt was an astounding revelation to me as a new believer when I learned that I didn't have to entertain every thought that came into my head. I had a choice about whether to listen to them or not. Many serial killers talk about how they heard a voice in their head telling them to kill and they just followed orders. When people are not raised to discern the voices in their head, they don't recognize the voice of the devil. He is a clever deceiver who will come to each one of us and try to speak lies into our minds. We have to be ready for him.\n\n### The Lies We Believe\n\nDo you ever have certain thoughts that play over and over in your mind like an old broken record? Have you ever had a thought come to your mind that produces a physical feeling in your body, such as a pain in your heart, a queasy sensation in the pit of your stomach, tightness in your throat, weakness in your arms and legs, tears in your eyes, a rash on your face and neck? Do \"what if\" thoughts ever plague your mind, such as \"What if I jumped off the balcony?\" or \"What if I ran my car into that wall?\" Have you ever had \"if only\" thoughts? Such as, \"If only I hadn't done that.\" \"If only I had been there.\" \"If only I would have said something.\" Do you ever have self-punishing thoughts? \"No one cares about me.\" \"I'm such a failure.\" \"I'm no good.\" \"Nothing I do turns out right.\"\n\nIf you've had thoughts like these, please know that this is not God giving you revelation for your life. It is the enemy trying to gain control of your mind.\n\nLife has much suffering, but too often we suffer unnecessarily because of lies we believe about ourselves and our circumstances. We accept as fact the words that are spoken to our souls by an enemy who wants us destroyed. We can become fearful, depressed, lonely, angry, doubtful, confused, insecure, hopeless, beaten down, worried, and full of self-pity, all because of lies we believe. But we can overcome each one of these lies with prayer, faith, and the truth of God's Word.\n\nYou must be aware, however, that one of the enemy's tactics is to try and steal God's Word from you. He will do that by getting you to question God's Word, just as he did with Eve in the Garden. \"Did God really say that?\" \"Does God really mean that?\" \"Will God really mind if you do that?\" \"Does God really care about you?\"\n\nThen he will contradict God's Word. \"God didn't say that.\" \"God doesn't mind that.\" \"God doesn't think you're worth much.\" \"God's withholding good things from you.\"\n\nWhen the thoughts that you think begin to question and contradict God's Word, you are being set up by your enemy. Remember, \"there is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way of death\" (Proverbs 14:12). Certain thoughts may appear to you to be accurate, but when you hold them up next to God's Word, the lie is exposed.\n\nDeception is the enemy's ongoing plan of attack. Jesus said the devil \"was a murderer from the beginning, and does not stand in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaks a lie, he speaks from his own resources, for he is a liar and the father of it\" (John 8:44). The _only_ power the devil has is in getting people to believe his lies. If they don't believe his lies, he is powerless to get his work done.\n\n### Choose Your Thoughts Carefully\n\nYou have a choice about what you will accept into your mind and what you won't. You can choose to take every thought captive and \"let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus\" (Philippians 2:5), or you can allow the devil to feed you lies and manipulate your life. Every sin begins as a thought in the mind. \"For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed evil thoughts, adulteries, fornications, murders, thefts, covetousness, wickedness, deceit, lewdness, an evil eye, blasphemy, pride, foolishness\" (Mark 7:21-22). If you don't take control of your mind, the devil will.\n\nThat's why you must be diligent to monitor what you allow into your mind. What TV shows, magazines, and books do you look at? What music, radio programs, or CDs do you listen to? Do they fill your mind with godly thoughts and feed your spirit so you feel enriched, clear-minded, peaceful, and blessed or do they deplete you and leave you feeling empty, confused, anxious, and fearful? \"God is not the author of confusion but of peace\" (1 Corinthians 14:33). When we fill our minds with God's Word and godly books and magazines written by people in whom God's Spirit resides, and we listen to music that praises and glorifies Him, we leave no room for the enemy's propaganda.\n\nIf you want to determine whether your thoughts are from the enemy or the Lord, ask yourself, \"Are these thoughts I would _choose_ to have?\" If you answer no, then they are probably from your enemy. If, for example, you are sitting in church and you suddenly envision the choir naked, recognize where this is coming from. Rather than beat yourself up for having impure thoughts, tell the enemy to get off your brain because you will not allow your soul to be a dumping ground for his trash. Tell him you \"have the mind of Christ\" and you won't listen to anything that is inconsistent with that (1 Corinthians 2:16).\n\nRefusing to entertain unrighteousness in your thought life is part of resisting the devil. How many people have we known who should have done that and didn't?\n\nYou don't have to live with confusion or mental oppression. You don't have to \"walk as the rest of the Gentiles walk, in the futility of their mind, having their understanding darkened, being alienated from the life of God, because of the ignorance that is in them, because of the hardnening of their heart\" (Ephesians 4:17-18). Instead you can have clarity and knowledge. Even though your enemy tries to convince you that your future is as hopeless as his, or that you are a failure with no purpose, value, gifts, or abilities, God says exactly the opposite. Believe God and don't listen to anything else.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , help me to never exchange Your truth for a lie. Where I have accepted a lie as truth, reveal that to me. Help me to clearly discern when it is the enemy who is speaking. I don't want to think futile and foolish thoughts or give place to thoughts that are not glorifying to You (Romans 1:21). I don't want to walk according to my own thinking (Isaiah 65:2). I want to bring every thought captive and control my mind.\n\nYour Word is \"a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart\" (Hebrews 4:12). As I read Your Word, may it reveal any wrong thinking in me. May Your Word be so etched in my mind that I will be able to identify a lie of the enemy the minute I hear it. Spirit of Truth, keep me undeceived. I know You have given me authority \"over all the power of the enemy\" (Luke 10:19), and so I command the enemy to get away from my mind. I refuse to listen to lies.\n\nThank You, Lord, that I \"have the mind of Christ\" (1 Corinthians 2:16). I want Your thoughts to be my thoughts. Show me where I have filled my mind with anything that is ungodly. Help me to resist doing that and instead fill my mind with thoughts, words, music, and images that are glorifying to You. Help me to think upon what is true, noble, just, pure, lovely, of good report, virtuous, and praiseworthy (Philippians 4:8). I lay claim to the \"sound mind\" that You have given me (2 Timothy 1:7).\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nDo not be conformed to this world, but be  \ntransformed by the renewing of your mind, that you  \nmay prove what is that good and acceptable  \nand perfect will of God.  \n **R OMANS 12:2**\n\nThough we walk in the flesh, we do not war  \naccording to the flesh. For the weapons of our  \nwarfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling  \ndown strongholds, casting down arguments and every  \nhigh thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of  \nGod, bringing every thought into captivity to  \nthe obedience of Christ.  \n **2 C ORINTHIANS 10:3-5**\n\nTo be carnally minded is death, but to be spiritually  \nminded is life and peace.  \n **R OMANS 8:6**\n\nPut off, concerning your former conduct, the old man  \nwhich grows corrupt according to the deceitful lusts,  \nand be renewed in the spirit of your mind, and . . . put  \non the new man which was created according to  \nGod, in true righteousness and holiness.  \n **E PHESIANS 4:22-24**\n\nYou will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is  \nstayed on You, because he trusts in You.  \n **I SAIAH 26:3**\n\n##   CHAPTER SEVEN\n\n## [Lord, Rule Me in Every  \nArea of My Life](contents.html#rechapter07)\n\nI know a young man who has a heart for God and is tremendously gifted to lead worship and teach the Word. But he can't bring himself to fully surrender his life to the Lord. He continues to live his own way, doing his own thing, and is constantly frustrated that nothing has worked out in his life\u2014not only his personal life, but also his career and finances. I know if he would just say, \"Whatever You want, Lord, I will do it\" and truly live that out, God would use him powerfully and every part of his life would be blessed.\n\nWhy do some people never seem to grow in the Lord? Why is it they go from one calamity to the next, never able to get beyond survival mode? Why do they seldom, if ever, experience the joy of the Lord? Spritual breakthrough? A deeper of relationship with Him? The release to step out in the area of their gifting? Why can't they move forward into the purposes and destiny God has for them?\n\nThe answer, I believe, lies in the word \"surrender.\" They have not fully surrendered everything to God. They have not truly made Jesus Lord over their lives.\n\nSurrendering everything means being willing to say, \"Lord, whatever You want me to do I'll do it. I say yes to anything You ask of me, even it means dying to myself and my desires. I will give up the things of the flesh that I want in order to have more of You in my life. I will go to church when I feel like staying home. I will fast when I feel like eating. I will pray when I would rather go to bed. I will read Your Word when I would rather watch TV. I will give when I would rather spend my money on myself. I will enter into praise and worship as my first reaction instead of my last resort. I will do whatever You say so that I can please You and move into all You have for me.\" This attitude of surrender means putting God first and submitting to His rulership. And it makes all the difference in our lives.\n\nJesus is Lord whether we declare it or not. That's because \"God also has highly exalted Him and given Him the name which is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those in heaven, and of those on earth, and of those under the earth, and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father\" (Philippians 2:9-11). But He is not only Lord over the universe, He is Lord over our individual lives as well. Whether we acknowledge that or not will determine the success and quality of our life. If we don't personally declare Jesus to be Lord over our lives, it shows we are not controlled by the Spirit. \"No one can say that Jesus is Lord except by the Holy Spirit\" (1 Corinthians 12:3). It reveals we are still controlled by the flesh.\n\n### Whatever You Say, Lord\n\nDo you remember watching old western movies where the good guy (in the white shirt) catches the bad guy (in the black shirt) and points his gun at him and says, \"Stick 'em up!\" (It just doesn't sound as menacing to say, \"Stick _them_ up.\")\n\nThe bad guy drops everything, raises his hands, and says, \"I give up.\"\n\nWell, this is the kind of surrender God wants. Only you are not the bad guy and God is not pointing a gun at you. He is pointing His finger. But not in an accusatory or embarrassing way. He is pointing to you in a loving way, just as He would if He had picked you for His team. He is saying, \"You! I want you! Surrender to Me so I can give you all that I have for you.\"\n\nIf we would drop everything and say, \"I give up, Lord. I surrender. Take everything. I will do whatever You say,\" our lives would be better in every way.\n\nWhy is it so hard for us to simply say, \"Whatever You want, Lord. I'll do anything You ask\"? It's because we want what we want and we're afraid of what God might ask of us. We think He might do something to hurt us. Also, it's not just a matter of _saying_ , \"Jesus is Lord.\" We must then _do_ what He _says_. Jesus said, \"Why do you call Me 'Lord, Lord,' and do not do the things which I say?\" (Luke 6:46). We doubt that what God asks us to do will be for our greatest blessing. But that's wrong. God just wants us to be on the winning team.\n\nIf you feel you aren't experiencing any breakthrough in your life, check to see if you have truly surrendered yourself to the Lord. Have you given Jesus that place of Lordship? Have you let go of everything? If not, lift your hands and take that first step.\n\nJesus said, \"Whoever does not bear his cross and come after Me cannot be My disciple\" (Luke 14:27). You can't bear His cross unless you surrender your life to Him. A surrendered life, a life ruled entirely by God, is one that can be used powerfully for His kingdom purposes. God doesn't want just part of you. He wants it all. Pray that you will give God what He wants.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , I bow before You this day and declare that You are Lord over every area of my life. I surrender myself and my life to You and invite You to rule in every part of my mind, soul, body, and spirit. I love You with all my heart, with all my soul, and with all my mind. I commit to trusting You with my whole being. I declare You to be Lord over every area of my life today and every day.\n\nEnable me to deny myself in order to take up my cross daily and follow you (Luke 9:23). I want to be Your disciple just as You have said in Your Word (Luke 14:27). Help me to do what it takes. I want to lose my life in You so I can save it (Luke 9:24). Teach me what that means. Speak to me so that I may understand.\n\nHelp me to say yes to You immediately when You give me direction for my life. My desire is to please You and hold nothing back. I surrender my relationships, my finances, my work, my recreation, my decisions, my time, my body, my mind, my soul, my desires, and my dreams. I put them all in Your hands so they can be used for Your glory. I declare this day that \"I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me\" (Galatians 2:20). Rule me in every area of my life, Lord, and lead me into all that You have for me.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nIf anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny  \nhimself, and take up his cross daily, and follow Me.  \nFor whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but  \nwhoever loses his life for My sake will save it.  \n **L UKE 9:23-24**\n\nIf we live, we live to the Lord; and if we die, we  \ndie to the Lord. Therefore, whether we  \nlive or die, we are the Lord's.  \n **R OMANS 14:8**\n\nAs you have therefore received Christ Jesus the Lord,  \nso walk in Him, rooted and built up in Him and established  \nin the faith, as you have been taught,  \nabounding in it with thanksgiving.  \n **C OLOSSIANS 2:6-7**\n\nTrust in the LORD with all your heart, and lean not on  \nyour own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge  \nHim, and He shall direct your paths.  \n **P ROVERBS 3:5-6**\n\nTherefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand  \nof God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting  \nall your care upon Him, for He cares for you.  \n **1 P ETER 5:6-7**\n\n##   CHAPTER EIGHT\n\n## [Lord, Take Me Deeper in  \nYour Word](contents.html#rechapter08)\n\nSome time ago I went into the hospital for emergency surgery. I stayed there about two weeks and then spent six weeks at home with a nurse. I had eight months of recovery after that. It was over a year before I was even close to being back to normal. (I'll give you more details about this in a later chapter.)\n\nDuring that time in the hospital I was too sick and weak and in too much pain to read the Word. I was hooked up to a machine with tubes running in and out of my body, so I couldn't sit up or turn over. That meant holding a heavy Bible was out of the question. Because I needed round-the-clock care, my sister organized my husband, children, and close friends to spend specific times with me. Each person took a three-hour shift on different days, except for my daughter, who took a twelve-hour shift from 8:00 every night until 8:00 in the morning. This was extremely difficult for her because she was in college at the time and had to be up with me every couple hours at night and then go to school all day. Besides everything else these loving people did for me, I depended on them to read the Word of God to me.\n\nWhen I was sent home with a nurse, I had to be isolated from all people except my immediate family members because of the risk of infection. During that time, no one was able to read the Bible to me because they were too busy. (I don't say that as a criticism; they each had to take care of me plus do the work I usually do in addition to their own full-time work.) It was a considerable strain for everyone.\n\nSo during that time I spent convalescing at home I listened to the Bible on tape. But it wasn't the same as reading it myself. I don't retain information as well when I hear it as I do when I read it. Also, on tape the speaker keeps talking without stopping. I found I would get caught up thinking about a verse I'd just heard and then not hear the next ten. Normally, when I read the Word myself, I go over each verse slowly and thoroughly, especially the ones speaking to me at that moment. I let it digest in my inner being, and I ask God to teach me new things that I haven't seen before.\n\nEven after I began to recover and was able to sit up and read the Word myself, my mind was so foggy and my eyes so blurry from all the anesthetic and drugs I'd had to take every day that I had a hard time absorbing it. I knew the problem was in _me_ , but the Bible wasn't speaking to me like it used to, and I felt helpless as to what to do about it. Reading the Word had always been life-giving for me, but now it became more of a duty. I read because I knew I needed to.\n\nAnother factor in all this was that I couldn't go to church for five months, so I wasn't being taught the Word from the pulpit or from a Bible study. I had not been without that type of teaching for longer than two weeks at a time since I had become a believer 31 years before. I listened to tapes of sermons, but my mind wandered, and I often fell asleep in the middle of them.\n\nBecause I didn't have regular feeding in the Word of God the way I usually had, I began to lose ground in my life. It became harder to make decisions because I didn't hear God's voice as clearly as I used to. It was difficult to write because I couldn't focus on what God wanted me to say. But most of all I felt empty inside. It wasn't until I thought to actually _pray_ about the problem itself that I experienced breakthrough in this area. I prayed, \"Lord, I need to have Your Word come alive to me again. Make that happen, Father. Clear my mind and soul. Teach me new things. Help me to go deeper into Your Word than ever before.\"\n\nAbout a week after I started praying that prayer, God answered it. The Bible became fresh and exciting again. I found new revelation. New understanding. I decided if God answered that simple prayer, then why shouldn't we pray _every_ time we read the Bible, \"Lord, take me deeper into Your Word\"? Our time in God's Word is one of the most important aspects of our lives, and it should be covered in prayer.\n\n### Daily Bread for Our Souls\n\nGod's Word is food for our souls. We can't live without it. It is written that \"man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God\" (Matthew 4:4). If we are not continually fed with God's Word, we will starve spiritually.\n\nIn those months when I was in the hospital and recovering, I was amazed at how much of the Word I lost from my memory. I realize that all the medicine and anesthetic I had in me contributed a lot to that, but I was shocked that I couldn't remember certain Scriptures I used to quote so easily. After all those years of reading the Bible, how could I lose so much so quickly? Of course, there are some Scriptures that are engraved in my brain and soul that I probably could recite in my sleep, but I realized then how important it is for each of us to _guard_ the Word of God that has been deposited in our souls. \"Therefore we must give the more earnest heed to the things we have heard, lest we drift away\" (Hebrews 2:1). We don't realize how quickly it can be stolen from us.\n\n### Be a Doer of the Word\n\nIt doesn't matter how long you walk with God; He always has new things for you to learn. It may be new dimensions of what you already know, or it may be something you have never seen before. Either way, it's not enough to just _learn_ the truth; you must _act_ on it. \"Be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man observing his natural face in a mirror; for he observes himself, goes away, and immediately forgets what kind of man he was\" (James 1:22-24). If we don't _do_ what the Word says, we not only _forget_ it but we also forget who we are in the process.\n\nWhenever you read God's Word, it is essential to ask Him to help you practically apply it to your life. Take a step that indicates you believe what you read and are going to live like it. If you don't, what you know of the Word will be taken from you. It's possible to _hear_ the Word, _read_ the Word, and even _teach_ the Word and still remain unchanged and unaffected. All Scripture will teach us, convict us, enrich us, heal us, warn us, and expose our hearts. But we have to act on it. That's why you have to ask God to speak to you every time you read His Word and show you what you should be doing in response to it.\n\n### Ten Good Reasons to Read God's Word\n\nIf you have trouble being in God's Word every day, here are just a few of the many reasons to read the Bible that should inspire you:\n\n1. _To know where you are going_. You can't foresee the future or _exactly_ where you are heading, but God's Word will guide you. \"Direct my steps by Your word, and let no iniquity have dominion over me\" (Psalm 119:133).\n\n2. _To have wisdom._ Knowledge of God's Word is where wisdom begins to grow in you. \"The law of the LORD is perfect, converting the soul; the testimony of the LORD is sure, making wise the simple\" (Psalm 19:7).\n\n3. _To find success._ When you live according to the teachings of the Bible, life works. \"This Book of the Law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate in it day and night, that you may observe to do according to all that is written in it. For then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have good success\" (Joshua 1:8).\n\n4. _To live in purity._ You must live a life of holiness and purity in order to enjoy more of the Lord's presence, but you can't be made pure without being cleansed through God's Word. \"How can a young man cleanse his way? By taking heed according to Your word\" (Psalm 119:9).\n\n5. _To obey God._ If you don't understand what God's laws are, how can you obey them? \"Teach me, O LORD, the way of Your statutes, and I shall keep it to the end. Give me understanding, and I shall keep Your law; indeed, I shall observe it with my whole heart. Make me walk in the path of Your commandments, for I delight in it\" (Psalm 119:33-35).\n\n6. _To have joy._ You cannot be free of anxiety and unrest without the Word of God in your heart. \"The statutes of the LORD are right, rejoicing the heart; The commandment of the LORD is pure, enlightening the eyes\" (Psalm 19:8).\n\n7. _To grow in faith_. You can't grow in faith without reading and hearing the Word of God. \"So then faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God\" (Romans 10:17).\n\n8. _To find deliverance._ You won't know what you need to be free of unless you study God's Word to find out. \"If you abide in My Word, you are My disciples indeed. And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free\" (John 8:31-32).\n\n9. _To have peace_. God will give you a peace that the world can't give, but you must find it first in His Word. \"Great peace have those who love Your law, and nothing causes them to stumble\" (Psalm 119:165).\n\n10. _To distinguish good from evil._ Everything has become so relative today, how can you know for sure what is right and wrong without God's Word? \"Your Word I have hidden in my heart, that I might not sin against You!\" (Psalm 119:11).\n\n### Going for the Gold\n\nGod has gold nuggets and diamonds everywhere in His Word, but we must dig them out. And, just like precious gems and metals when they are first pulled from the ground, the treasures of God's Word need to be polished and refined in us in order to have the brilliance they are capable of revealing. Every time you go over one of God's promises in your heart, it will become more refined and polished in you and shine more brightly in your soul.\n\nOne of the most priceless gems you will find in God's Word is His voice. That's because He speaks to us through His Word as we read it or hear it. In fact, we can't really learn to recognize God's voice to our soul if we are not hearing Him speak to us first in His Word. The more you hear it, the easier it is to recognize, and the less chance you will accept a counterfeit.\n\nThere were countless times in my early walk with the Lord when I was still suffering from depression and anxiety that I turned to his Word. All it took was reading the Bible for a few minutes, and I would feel calm and hopeful again. That's because the Word straightens out our mind and soul and helps us think clearly about things. It leads us away from self-destructive thoughts and enables us to enjoy a sense of well-being. It gives us hope and keeps us on course. It provides us a solid foundation upon which to build a life of wholeness. Ask God to meet you in His Word every day. He looks forward to that, and He wants you to also.\n\nThere is no way to draw closer to God, or have a clean and right heart before Him, or be a forgiving person, or walk in obedience to His ways, or take control of your mind, or stand against the enemy, or make Jesus Lord of your life unless you are in the Word of God every day. It's your compass. Your guide. You can't get where you need to go without it.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , I thank You for Your Word. \"Your Word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path\" (Psalm 119:105). It is food to my soul, and I can't live without it. Enable me to truly comprehend its deepest meaning. Give me greater understanding than I have ever had before, and reveal to me the hidden treasures buried there. I pray that I will have a heart that is teachable and open to what You want me to know. I desire Your instruction. Teach me so I may learn.\n\nHelp me to be diligent to put Your Word inside my soul faithfully every day. Show me where I'm wasting time that could be better spent reading Your Word. Give me the ability to memorize it. Etch it in my mind and heart. Make it become a part of me. Change me as I read it.\n\nLord, I don't want to be just a hearer of Your Word. Show me how to be a doer of Your Word as well. Enable me to respond the way I should and obey You. Show me when I am not doing what it says. Help me to apply my heart to Your instruction and my ears to Your Words of knowledge (Proverbs 23:12). May Your Word correct my attitude and remind me of what my purpose is on earth. May it cleanse my heart and give me hope that I can rise above my limitations. May it increase my faith and remind me of who You are and how much You love me. May it bring the security of knowing my life is in Your hands and You will supply all my needs.\n\nThank You, Lord, that when I look into Your Word I find You. Help me to know You better through it. Give me ears to recognize Your voice speaking to me every time I read it (Mark 4:23). I don't want to ever miss the way You are leading me. When I hear Your voice and follow You, my life is full. When I get off the path You have for me, my life is empty. Guide, perfect, and fill me with Your Word this day.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nThe Word of God is living and powerful, and sharper  \nthan any two-edged sword, piercing even to the  \ndivision of soul and spirit, and of joints and  \nmarrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts  \nand intents of the heart.  \n **H EBREWS 4:12**\n\nHe who looks into the perfect law of liberty and  \ncontinues in it, and is not a forgetful hearer  \nbut a doer of the work, this one will be  \nblessed in what he does.  \n **J AMES 1:25**\n\nBlessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of  \nthe ungodly, nor stands in the path of sinners, nor  \nsits in the seat of the scornful; but his delight is in  \nthe law of the LORD, and in His law he meditates day  \nand night. He shall be like a tree planted by the  \nrivers of water, that brings forth its fruit in its season,  \nwhose leaf also shall not wither; and whatever he does shall prosper.  \n **P SALM 1:1-3**\n\nWhoever keeps His word, truly the love of God is  \nperfected in him. By this we know that  \nwe are in Him.  \n **1 J OHN 2:5**\n\nHe who heeds the word wisely will find good,  \nand whoever trusts in the LORD, happy is he.  \n **P ROVERBS 16:20**\n\n##   CHAPTER NINE\n\n## [Lord, Instruct Me as I Put  \nMy Life in Right Order](contents.html#rechapter09)\n\nTabitha was a disciple of Christ. A _female_ disciple! This means she was a believer who followed faithfully the teachings of Jesus. She also did many good works and charitable deeds which benefited others. As a result, she was dearly loved.\n\nSome time after Jesus was crucified and had risen, Tabitha became ill and died. Several men went to find Peter, one of the original 12 disciples, and bring him back to where Tabitha's body was being prepared for burial. When Peter arrived at the house, he went to the upper room where she had been laid. He asked the women who were weeping over her to leave him alone in the room, and then he knelt down to pray.\n\nWhen Peter finished praying, he turned toward the dead woman's body and said, \"Tabitha, arise.\" Immediately she opened her eyes and sat up. Extending his hand to her, Peter helped her to her feet. When all the people saw that Tabitha had been brought back from the dead, many believed in the Lord (Acts 9:36-42).\n\nThere is nothing else known about Tabitha, but from this short account of her life it's clear that she was a woman who had her priorities in order. She loved the Lord. She loved others. She had a servant's heart. She lived her life in a way that pleased God and blessed people. All this information about her is found in that one word\u2014\"disciple.\"\n\nWhen trouble came into Tabitha's life and she was struck down even to the point of death, God sent one of His faithful disciples to pray for her and raise her up again. Would this have happened if she were just a nominal believer, living on the distant edge of the life God wanted her to live? Would this have happened if she didn't love God? Didn't love others? Didn't have a servant's heart? Didn't give of herself? Didn't obey? I don't think so. Her life was in order and God blessed her because of it. And He gave her a second chance. That's what He wants to do for us if we will put Him first.\n\n### Top Priority\n\nWe can't live successfully without right priorities in our lives. Yet some of us try to do that every day. Correct priorities are not something we can figure out on our own. We have to be led by the Holy Spirit and have a clear knowledge of God's Word in order to understand what they should be.\n\nOur two most important priorities come directly from the Word of God. Jesus told us about them saying, \" 'You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.' This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like it: 'You shall love your neighbor as yourself' \" (Matthew 22:37-39). It can't get much clearer than that. If you maintain these two top priorities\u2014love God and love others\u2014they will guide you in setting all the other priorities in your life.\n\nYour relationship with the Lord must always have top priority over everything else. The Lord said, \"You shall have no other gods before Me\" (Exodus 20:3), and He means it. God wants your _undivided_ attention. When you seek Him first every day and ask Him to help you put your life in order, He will do that. I know from experience, and I'm sure you do too, that when we don't seek God first, our lives get out of control. As a result, our lives start ruling _us_ instead of us being in charge of _them_.\n\nGod is a God of order. We can tell that by looking at the universe. None of it is random or accidental. He doesn't want our lives to be either. His will is that we \"let all things be done decently and in order\" (1 Corinthians 14:40). And when we pray to Him about it, He will help us do just that. He will show us how to align ourselves under proper authority so that we can come under the covering of His protection. This is crucial to our moving into all God has for us.\n\n### The Submission Issue\n\nSubmission is something you _decide_ to do, not something someone _forces_ you to do. The meaning of the word \"submit\" is \"to submit yourself.\" It's a condition of the heart. Having a submitted heart means you are _willing_ to submit yourself and come into proper alignment in accordance with God's will.\n\nOur first priority in submission must always be to \"submit to God\" (James 4:7). This means you do not have to submit to the wishes of anyone who asks you to do something that is against God's commands. You can have a submitted heart and still be able to draw the line when what is being asked of you violates your conscience and the laws of God.\n\nFor example, if a person who is a designated authority over your life asks you to do something that is wrong, or if that person says or does something to you that is inappropriate and violates what is right in the sight of God, you must decline to be a party to it and declare it to be wrong. But you don't have to scream at the person saying, \"You idiot! You fool! What is the matter with you? Get behind me, Satan!\" Instead, give them a respectful explanation such as, \"With all due respect, I believe that what you are asking me to do is a violation of the laws of God, and I could not with any good conscience do it, knowing it would bring God's judgment on us both.\" Or \"What you just said and did to me is offensive in the eyes of God, and I must tell you that such inappropriate behavior will not serve either of us well.\"\n\nThe difference between having a submitted heart and one that is not is that one will garner blessings for you and the other will get you into trouble.\n\nJesus Himself was submitted to God. His priorities were definitely in order. God wants that \"this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus, who, being in the form of God, did not consider it robbery to be equal with God, but made Himself of no reputation, taking the form of a bond-servant, and coming in the likeness of men. And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself and became obedient to the point of death, even the death of the cross\" (Philippians 2:5-8). Now that's submission! It would seem that if anyone might not have to be in perfect submission it would be Jesus. Yet in order to accomplish God's purpose for His life, He was submitted to the will of the Father, even to the point of unfathomable suffering and death. What a role model He is for all of us.\n\n### When Trust Is Violated\n\nMany women have a problem with submission because their trust has been violated or they were hurt in the past when they submitted to someone. No one wants to be a doormat or the object of another person's abuse. God does not want that either. Nor is He asking you to be a mindless robot. That's why you must pray for wisdom about this issue. It is a highly sensitive one, and you need to discern what the Lord is telling you.\n\nFor those of you who have had a terrible experience with this issue, I want to encourage you. God is not asking you to be stupid, sacrifice your sanity for a principle, or suffer at the hand of an abuser. He will give you wisdom when you ask for it. If you find yourself going along with someone who violates the Word of God and His holy laws, not to mention your own conscience, that's not submission. That's just dumb. Don't let yourself go there.\n\nI know of a woman who submitted to an abusive husband, and he ended up killing her. She wasn't spiritually discerning because she didn't put God first and seek Him as to what to do. She stayed in that violent relationship until it turned disastrous instead of doing what was necessary to find help. That is _not_ submission, that's foolishness.\n\nI know of another woman who refused to submit to her husband in any way, and she ended up losing her whole family and her home. Because she had been sexually violated by a leader in her church when she was a teenager, she would not consider trusting any man enough to submit to him.\n\nThere has to be a balance. And that balance can only be found by submitting to _God first._ Ask Him to help you discern exactly to whom you are to be submitted and in what way. Don't just submit blindly or ignorantly. Know what you are doing. When your heart's desire is to do what's right and be in right order, God will help you find that perfect balance.\n\n### It All Falls into Place\n\nThe Bible says we should submit to authority figures designated by God in our church, in our family, in our work, and in our government. To be in right order and have our lives work well, we need to be planted in a church home. It gives us a base of operation. We can't get as far as God wants us to go without it.\n\nEach church has a unique distinction and purpose, and you will not be happy until you find the one God has for you. This doesn't mean you have to go to a different church every week until you find one that is perfect and makes you 100 percent happy. Those don't exist. Churches are, after all, made up of imperfect people like us. What it does mean is that you need to ask God to show you where your church family is.\n\nWhen you are in the church you are supposed to be in, you will recognize the pastor's voice as an important spiritual authority in your life. Again, you need to have wisdom and the leading of the Lord. If the authority figures in your church get offtrack and there is immorality, financial corruption, unbiblical teaching, or sin, then you should not be subject to that kind of leadership. Ask God to lead you away from an unholy alignment.\n\nWe all need a pastor, a strong Christian leader, or a mentor speaking truth into our lives. God will help you discern who that is. Don't get me wrong, this is not a case for having a guru. The spiritual authority in your life is God's _messenger_ , not someone to be worshiped instead of God. This is also not a gender issue. The Bible says, \"there is neither male or female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus\" (Galatians 3:28). This is about having someone in your life to speak truth to you in love and cover you in prayer.\n\nBeyond your submission to God and your submission to other designated authorities in your life, you must be in right relationship to other people, \"submitting to one another in the fear of God\" (Ephesians 5:21). Submission to others takes a heart that loves others as ourselves. That's the key. When you love God first and others second, all the other priorities in your life will fall into place and you will be in right order. When you ask God to show you clearly what your priorities should be, He will.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , I pray You would help me set my life in right order. I want to always put You first above all else in my life. Teach me how to love You with all my heart, mind, and soul. Show me when I am not doing that. I don't want to have any other gods but You in my life. Show me if I have lifted up my soul to an idol. My desire is to serve You and only You. Help me to live accordingly.\n\nGive me a submissive heart. Help me to always submit to the governing authorities and the correct people in my family, work, and church. Show me who the proper spiritual authorities are to be in my life. Plant me in the church you want me to be in. Help me to move into proper alignment in every area of my life by willingly submitting myself to others where I need to do so. Show me clearly to whom I am to be submitted and how I am to do it. Give me discernment and wisdom about this. Show me any time I am not submitted to the right people in the right way.\n\nI know that if my life is not in proper order I will not receive the blessings You have for me. But I also know that if I seek You first, all that I need will be added to me (Matthew 6:33). I seek You first this day and ask that You would enable me to put my life in perfect order. May I never come out from under the covering of spiritual protection You have placed in my life.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nSeek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness,  \nand all these things shall be added to you.  \n **M ATTHEW 6:33**\n\nHe who finds his life will lose it, and he who loses his  \nlife for My sake will find it.  \n **M ATTHEW 10:39**\n\nAll of you be submissive to one another, and be  \nclothed with humility, for \"God resists the proud, but  \ngives grace to the humble.\"  \n **1 P ETER 5:5**\n\nAnd this commandment we have from Him:  \nthat he who loves God must love his brother also.  \n **1 J OHN 4:21**\n\nObey those who rule over you, and be submissive, for  \nthey watch out for your souls, as those who must give  \naccount. Let them do so with joy and not with grief,  \nfor that would be unprofitable for you.  \n **H EBREWS 13:17**\n\n##   CHAPTER TEN\n\n## [Lord, Prepare Me to Be a  \nTrue Worshiper](contents.html#rechapter10)\n\nWhen I used to work as a singer, dancer, and actress on television during the time when musical variety shows were at their peak, I would have to sing a song over and over all day long while I was rehearsing it with the choreography. Then I had to sing it over and over again in the evening as we prerecorded it for the show the next day. It had to be prerecorded because when I was dancing and singing at the same time, I could not be miked for sound. There were no portable headsets back then as there are now. I used to go home at night after the last session of the day and could hardly sleep because the music and lyrics of the songs we had been working on would still be playing over and over in my mind. I could not get them out of my head.\n\nThat is exactly what happens to us when we hear and sing praise and worship songs over and over. They continue to play in our mind, soul, and spirit even when we are not actually worshiping God. Even when we are sleeping.\n\nI learned that principle years ago when I became a believer. Back then when I suffered with severe depression, there were countless times I would get up in the middle of the night to sing or speak praises to the Lord in order to get rid of it. I had gone to several doctors about it, but the medicine they gave me only seemed to cover up the problem. It was always still there when the medicine wore off. I'm not saying that people shouldn't take medicine if they are depressed. I'm saying it didn't solve the problem for _me._ I had suffered from depression from the time I was a young child and was locked in a closet by my mother. The hopelessness, futility, and sadness I felt about myself and my life made it hard to get through each day. I needed an infusion of the joy of the Lord, and that's what praising God did for me.\n\nWhen I praised and worshiped God, it was like being hooked up to a spiritual IV. As long as I had my heart and eyes lifted to God in worship and praise, the joy of the Lord poured into my body, mind, soul, and spirit and crowded out the darkness and depression. It worked every time.\n\nI started buying praise and worship songs on tape and later CDs. I played them in the car as I drove, in the bathroom when I was drying my hair, in the kitchen as I was cooking, through the house when I was doing housework, or at my desk when I was writing letters or going through the mail. Sometimes I would sing along to them, but other times I would just let the music play through my mind and spirit. It amazed me that confusion, oppression, fear, or anxiety couldn't exist in the heart of a worshiping child of God. Eventually, I got free of depression completely.\n\nNothing we do is more powerful or more life-changing than praising God. It is one of the means by which God transforms us. Every time we praise and worship Him, His presence comes to dwell in us and changes our hearts and allows the Holy Spirit to soften and mold them into whatever He wants them to be.\n\nBecause praise and worship is not something our flesh naturally _wants_ to do, we have to _will_ ourselves to do it. And because it's not the first thing we think of to do, we have to decide to do it no matter what our circumstances. We have to say, \"I _will_ praise the Lord.\" Of course, the more we get to know God, the easier praise becomes. When we get to the point where we can't keep from praising Him, then we are at the place we are supposed to be. If you ever find yourself unmotivated in this regard, try reading the following 20 reasons to worship God from Psalm 103. It works for me every time.\n\n### Twenty Good Reasons to Worship God\n\n1. _He forgives my iniquities_.\n\n2. _He heals all my diseases_.\n\n3. _He redeems my life from destruction_.\n\n4. _He crowns me with lovingkindness_.\n\n5. _He satisfies my mouth with good things_.\n\n6. _He executes righteousness and justice for the oppressed_.\n\n7. _He makes His ways known_.\n\n8. _He is merciful_.\n\n9. _He is gracious_.\n\n10. _He is slow to anger_.\n\n11. _He will not strive with us_.\n\n12. _He will not keep His anger forever_.\n\n13. _He does not punish us according to our iniquities_.\n\n14. _He shows great mercy to those who fear Him_.\n\n15. _He removes our transgressions from us_.\n\n16. _He has pity on us_.\n\n17. _He remembers we are dust_.\n\n18. _His mercy is everlasting_.\n\n19. _He blesses our children and grandchildren who obey Him_.\n\n20. _He rules over all and His throne is established_.\n\n### Worship His Way\n\nWe can claim to know and love God, but if we are not worshiping and praising Him every day, we are in the dark about who He really is. \"Although they knew God, they did not glorify Him as God, nor were thankful, but became futile in their thoughts, and their foolish hearts were darkened\" (Romans 1:21). We shut off so much in our lives when we don't give God the glory due Him. We don't want to be wandering around in the dark entertaining futility in our minds, all because we are not _true_ worshipers of our awesome God.\n\n### Five God Ways to Praise the Lord\n\nGod wants us to give our whole self to worshiping Him, and He wants us to do it _His_ way.\n\n1. _God wants us to sing our praises to Him_. \"Praise the LORD! For it is good to sing praises to our God; for it is pleasant, and praise is beautiful\" (Psalm 147:1). \"Serve the LORD with gladness; come before His presence with singing\" (Psalm 100:2).\n\n2. _God wants us to lift our hands to Him_. \"Lift up your hands in the sanctuary, and bless the LORD\" (Psalm 134:2).\n\n3. _God wants us to speak our praise to Him_. \"Therefore by Him let us continually offer the sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of our lips, giving thanks to His name\" (Hebrews 13:15).\n\n4. _God wants us to praise Him with dancing and instruments_. \"Let them praise His name with the dance; let them sing praises to Him with the timbrel and harp\" (Psalm 149:3).\n\n5. _God wants us to praise Him together with other believers_. \"I will declare Your name to My brethren; in the midst of the assembly I will sing praise to You\" (Hebrews 2:12).\n\nPraising and worshiping God with other believers is one of the most powerful and significant things we can do in our lives. Corporate worship causes bondages to be broken, and it makes the way for wonderful changes in us that might never happen otherwise. A powerful dynamic occurs in the spirit realm when we worship God together that can't happen any other way.\n\nNo matter what your church background is or has been, ask God to make you into the true worshiper He wants you to be. Give your whole self to it. As long as you have breath you can \"rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you\" (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18). The songs of worship you sing over and over in your heart in the day will fill your soul in the night.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , there is no source of greater joy for me than worshiping You. I come into Your presence with thanksgiving and bow before You this day. I exalt Your name for You are great and worthy to be praised. Thank You that \"You have put gladness in my heart\" (Psalm 4:7). All honor and majesty, strength and glory, holiness and righteousness are Yours, O Lord.\n\nThank You that You are \"gracious and full of compassion, slow to anger and great in mercy\" (Psalm 145:8). Thank You that You are \"mighty in power\" and Your \"understanding is infinite\" (Psalm 147:5). Thank You that You lift up the humble and cast the wicked down (Psalm 147:6). Thank You that You execute justice for the oppressed, You give food to the hungry, and You give freedom to the prisoners. Thank You that You open the eyes of the blind and raise up those who are bowed down (Psalm 146:7-8).\n\nThank You, Lord, that Your plans for my life are good, and You have a future for me that is full of hope. Thank You that You are always restoring my life to greater wholeness. I praise You and thank You that You are my Healer, my Deliverer, my Provider, my Redeemer, my Father, and my Comforter. Thank You for revealing Yourself to me through Your Word, through Your Son, Jesus, and through Your mighty works upon the earth and in my life. Thank You for Your love, peace, joy, faithfulness, grace, mercy, kindness, truth, and healing. Thank You that I can depend on You, for You and Your Word are unfailing. Thank You that You are the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow.\n\nLord, forgive me when I neglect to praise and worship You as You deserve and desire. Teach me to worship You with my whole heart the way You want me to. Make me a _true_ worshiper, Lord. May praise and worship of You be my first response to every circumstance.\n\nI praise Your name this day, Lord, for You are good and Your mercy endures forever (Psalm 136:1). \"Because Your lovingkindness is better than life, my lips shall praise You. Thus I will bless You while I live; I will lift up my hands in Your name\" (Psalm 63:3-4). I will declare Your \"glory among the nations\" and Your \"wonders among all peoples\" (Psalm 96:3). I worship You in the splendor of Your holiness and give You the glory due Your name (Psalm 29:2).\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nBut the hour is coming, and now is, when the true  \nworshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth;  \nfor the Father is seeking such to worship Him.  \nGod is Spirit, and those who worship Him  \nmust worship in spirit and truth.  \n **J OHN 4:23-24**\n\nOffer to God thanksgiving, and pay your vows to the  \nMost High. Call upon Me in the day of trouble; I will  \ndeliver you, and you shall glorify Me.  \n **P SALM 50:14-15**\n\nLet all those rejoice who put their trust in You; let  \nthem ever shout for joy, because You defend them; let  \nthose also who love Your name be joyful in You. For  \nYou, O LORD, will bless the righteous; with favor You  \nwill surround him as with a shield.  \n **P SALM 5:11-12**\n\nWhoever offers praise glorifies Me; and to him who  \norders his conduct aright I will show the  \nsalvation of God.  \n **P SALM 50:23**\n\nI will praise You with my whole heart; before the  \ngods I will sing praises to You. I will worship toward  \nYour holy temple, and praise Your name for Your  \nlovingkindness and Your truth; for You have magnified  \nYour word above all Your name. In the day when  \nI cried out, You answered me, and made me bold  \nwith strength in my soul.  \n **P SALM 138:1-3**\n\n##   CHAPTER ELEVEN\n\n## [Lord, Bless Me in the  \nWork I Do](contents.html#rechapter11)\n\nI know what it's like to go to bed hungry. When I was a child, we were so poor there were many times when we had no food in the house and no way of getting any. That feeling of hunger was frightening, and the fear never left me, even after I grew up. In fact, this fear caused me to always work hard in order to ensure it would never happen again. It drove me to take every babysitting job I could get, for 50 cents an hour on weekends, instead of being with my friends when I was a young teenager. It's what made me work after school most days and into the night, plus all day Saturday and Sunday, when I was in high school and college. Even after I left college and was in the workforce, I held down _two_ jobs instead of one for the same reason. Always in the back of my mind was the fear that there wouldn't be enough money for food, so I often labored beyond what my body and mind could take.\n\nIt wasn't until I came to know the Lord and began to understand the way He provides for His children that I finally got rid of the fear. It was such a relief to discover that I could trust _God_ to take care of me. I no longer had to kill myself in desperation; I could look to Him for everything I needed.\n\nI also became more discerning about the work I was doing. I no longer had to take any and every job I could get. Instead, I asked God what work _He_ wanted me to do. I found that when I was led by the Lord in the work I did, and I committed all my work to Him for His glory, He blessed it. It was no longer drudgery. I prayed God would help me do it well, and as a result, my work soon became fruitful, successful, and fulfilling.\n\n### Everyone Has a Job to Do\n\nIt doesn't matter if you are a stay-at-home mom, a full-time student, a CEO of a giant corporation, a single woman who is self-supporting, a married woman running a home, a skilled career woman, a disabled person, a baby-sitter, a house sitter, a single working mom, or a volunteer at the rescue mission downtown\u2014you have work to do. It doesn't matter if your work is recognized by the whole world or only God sees it. It doesn't matter if you are getting paid big bucks or receiving no financial compensation whatsoever. Your work is valuable. And you want it to be blessed by God.\n\nWhatever work we do, we want to do it well and be successful. When our work is good, it gives us fulfillment. When we accomplish something worthwhile that makes life better for other people, our families, or ourselves, it gives us satisfaction. But when the work of our hands is not blessed, we are weighed down with frustration and unfulfillment.\n\nThe ideal woman described in the Bible is a hard worker (Proverbs 31). She buys and sells property (a real estate agent?). She plants a vineyard (a landscaper?). She makes clothing (a designer?). And she sells it (manager of a clothing store?). She is a woman of strength, energy, and vision who works hard into the night and knows that what she has to offer is good. God wants us to experience that kind of success and satisfaction. But it doesn't happen without prayer.\n\nPrayer helps us to find the balance between being \"greedy for gain,\" which depletes our life (Proverbs 1:19), and having \"a slack hand,\" which makes us poor (Proverbs 10:4). Prayer helps us to not \"overwork to be rich\" (Proverbs 23:4-5) yet still be diligent in our work, which may ultimately bring us monetary rewards (Proverbs 10:4). Prayer helps us find the balance between laziness and obsession, between gaining the whole world and losing our own soul (Matthew 16:26).\n\nThe Bible says that \"the laborer is worthy of his wages\" (1 Timothy 5:18). This means you deserve to be paid or rewarded for your work. Sometimes the reward is in the actual doing of it itself. You don't get paid for maintaining a home, serving soup at the rescue mission, or teaching a child to tie his shoes, but your reward for seeing the result of your labor is priceless. \"The labor of the righteous leads to life\" (Proverbs 10:16).\n\nIf you have a paying job, don't hesitate to pray that you will be compensated fairly and generously. Pray for your employer to be blessed in his business so he in turn can afford to pay all employees well. Pray that your work is recognized and appreciated by others. Pray to receive promotions and advancement in line with God's will. Say, \"Lord, I would like to have that promotion and that raise if it's Your will for my life.\" As you pray that way and commit your work to the Lord, He will bless it.\n\nNo matter what your paycheck reflects, your work is important to God, it's important to others, and it's important to you. You can't afford not to pray about it. Commit your work to the Lord and ask Him to bless it.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , I pray You would show me what work I am supposed to be doing. If it is something other than what I am doing now, reveal it to me. If it is something I am to do in addition to what I am already doing, show me that too. Whatever it is You have called me to do, both now and in the future, I pray You will give me the strength and energy to get it done well. Enable me to do what I do successfully. May I find great fulfillment and satisfaction in every aspect of it, even the most difficult and unpleasant parts.\n\nThank You that in all labor there is profit of one kind or another (Proverbs 14:23). I pray that the rewards of my work will be great. May I always be compensated fairly and richly out of the storehouse of Your abundance. Bless the people I work for and with. May I always be a blessing and a help to each one of them. As I come in contact with others in my work, I pray that Your love and peace will flow through me and speak loudly of Your goodness. Enable me to touch them for Your kingdom.\n\nLord, I thank You for the abilities You have given me. Where I am lacking in skill help me to grow and improve so that I do my work well. Teach me to excel so that the result of what I do will be pleasing to others. Open doors of opportunity to use my skills and close doors that I am not to go through. Give me wisdom and direction about that.\n\nI commit my work to You, Lord, knowing You will establish it (Proverbs 16:3). May it always be that I love the work I do and be able to do the work I love. According to Your Word I pray that I will not lag in diligence in my work, but remain fervent in spirit, serving You in everything I do (Romans 12:11). Establish the work of my hands so that what I do will find favor with others and be a blessing for many. May it always be glorifying to You.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nBlessed is every one who fears the LORD, who walks  \nin His ways. When you eat the labor of your hands,  \nyou shall be happy, and it shall be well with you.  \n **P SALM 128:1-2**\n\nThe blessing of the LORD makes one rich, and He  \nadds no sorrow with it.  \n **P ROVERBS 10:22**\n\nLet the beauty of the LORD our God be upon us, and  \nestablish the work of our hands for us; yes,  \nestablish the work of our hands.  \n **P SALM 90:17**\n\nDo you see a man who excels in his work? He will  \nstand before kings; he will not stand  \nbefore unknown men.  \n **P ROVERBS 22:29**\n\nEvery man should eat and drink and enjoy the good  \nof all his labor; it is the gift of God.  \n **E CCLESIASTES 3:13**\n\n##   CHAPTER TWELVE\n\n## [Lord, Plant Me so I Will  \nBear the Fruit of Your Spirit](contents.html#rechapter12)\n\nMy dad was a farmer for most of his life. He knew how to plant and grow healthy crops. The main thing I learned from him was how to grow a garden of vegetables and fruit. We didn't have the fancy tools people have today\u2014just a shovel and a hoe. We didn't even have running water or indoor plumbing, let alone a sprinkler system outside. We had to wait for the irrigation water to come through our land and then channel it to where the crops were by digging little furrows for the water to travel on either side of the rows of seed. That way it would water the roots without washing the seedlings or young plants away.\n\nAfter we planted the seeds and watered them, we nurtured, fed, and tended the soil around the seeds so they could grow without hindrance. We also tried to protect the young plants from elements such as hail, wind, and frost. We made sure that when the fruit or vegetables were being formed they didn't disconnect from the vine and that the vine didn't disconnect from the roots. If we were careful and diligent, we produced a good crop. And it always made my father proud.\n\nAll of us are planting something in our lives every single day, whether we realize it or not. And we are also reaping whatever we have planted in the past. The quality of our lives right now is the result of what we planted and harvested some time before. We reap the good and the bad for years after we have sown. That's why it is so important to plant and nurture the right seeds now.\n\nJesus said that He is the vine and you and I are the branches. If we abide in Him we will bear fruit (John 15:5). \"Abide\" means to remain, to stay, to dwell. In other words, if we dwell with Him and He dwells with us, we will bear the fruit of His Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23). That's what we want.\n\nIt is said that we begin to resemble the person with whom we live and with whom we are most closely associated. When we share our lives with Jesus, His likeness is stamped on our spirit and soul. When we plug into Him, the fruit of His Spirit is manifested in us.\n\n### Nine Good Ways to Produce a Great Crop\n\n1. _Plant seeds of love_. Ask God to plant His love in you in such a profound and powerful way that you are able to fully experience it. Ask also that His love will flow through you to others. Jesus said, \"If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love, just as I have kept My Father's commandments and abide in His love\" (John 15:10). Ask God to help you obey all of His laws so that nothing will keep the fullness of His love from blossoming in You.\n\n2. _Plant seeds of joy_. Joy has nothing to do with your circumstances. You can have joy in spite of difficult and painful problems, because joy comes through a close, intimate relationship with the Lord. You can't have joy if you feel separated from God or don't trust His promises to you. Jesus said, \"These things I have spoken to you, that My joy may remain in you, and that your joy may be full\" (John 15:11). When you live in the joy of the Lord, you have expectations that God is going to do something great in your life. Pray for the joy of the Lord to be so planted _in_ you and manifested _through_ you that the crop you reap will spread like wildfire and overtake the fields around you.\n\n3. _Plant seeds of peace_. Pray that the presence of the Lord planted in your life will provide peace that is beyond comprehension. Pray that this peace will grow strong and prevail no matter what your circumstances are. \"The peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus\" (Philippians 4:7). We can only have true peace if we live in right relationship to God. Pray that God will help you to know His peace in such a powerful way that it brings peace to those around you.\n\n4. _Plant seeds of patience_. Why do you think it's important to God that patience be growing in us? It's because God's timing is not our timing. He is always doing more than we see or know, so we have to trust Him on how long He takes to bring things to pass. God perfects and refines us before He brings us into all He has for us, and that takes time. \"Do not become sluggish, but imitate those who through faith and patience inherit the promises\" (Hebrews 6:12). \"Let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing\" (James 1:4). \"By your patience possess your souls\" (Luke 21:19). Another word for patience is longsuffering. And that says it all. When you suffer for a long time, it means you put up with more than you want to. Pray for God's patience to so be established in your soul that nothing you have to put up with will ever uproot it.\n\n5. _Plant seeds of kindness_. You have a choice in what you plant in a garden. You take the seeds you want and put them in the soil, and God makes them grow. Kindness is something you have to deliberately plant. Or, to put it another way, kindness is something you choose to put on, like a garment. \"Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, long-suffering\" (Colossians 3:12). The ultimate act of kindness was when Jesus gave His life for us. Pray that His brand of kindness will grow in you so that you can lay down your life for others with acts of kindness too.\n\n6. _Plant seeds of goodness_. When the goodness of God is sown in your soul, it leads you to produce good deeds. \"A good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings forth good things, and an evil man out of the evil treasure brings forth evil things\" (Matthew 12:35). \"Every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit. A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, nor can a bad tree bear good fruit\" (Matthew 7:17-18). Ask God to help you abide in Him so that His goodness will grow in you. As it grows in your heart, good things will automatically come forth from your life.\n\n7. _Plant seeds of faithfulness_. When we are solid, steadfast, dependable, reliable, loyal, and trustworthy and do what is right no matter what, we exhibit faithfulness. \"He who is faithful in what is least is faithful also in much; and he who is unjust in what is least is unjust also in much\" (Luke 16:10). Pray that His faithfulness will continually grow strong in you every day that you are alive. Pray that your faithfulness will strengthen everyone you touch and inspire others to greater faithfulness too.\n\n8. _Plant seeds of gentleness_. When we are brash and arrogant, it makes people feel bad about us and bad about themselves. Gentleness is a humble meekness that is calm, soothing, peaceful, and easy to be around. The Bible says, \"a servant of the Lord must not quarrel but be gentle to all\" (2 Timothy 2:24). \"The wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrisy\" (James 3:17). Being considerate of the feelings and needs of others by exhibiting gentleness shows you are responding to the Spirit of God and what has been planted in you has taken root. Pray that you can be as gentle and meek as Jesus was (2 Corinthians 10:1).\n\n9. _Plant seeds of self-control_. Self-control is not fragile like a strawberry plant; it's big and solid like an apple tree. Only God can plant something of that magnitude in you and make it bear fruit. Having no self-control means you do whatever pleases you no matter what the consequences are. Pray that you will not be powerless against the forces that tug on your soul. \"Add to your faith virtue, to virtue knowledge, to knowledge self-control, to self-control perseverance, to perseverance godliness\" (2 Peter 1:5-6). Ask God to plant self-control in you that will grow up like a tree of strength. Ask Him to help you to rein in your passions, desires, and emotions and make them subject to His Spirit. He will give you the self-discipline you need.\n\nIf you've not been bearing the fruit of the Spirit in your life the way you'd like, ask God to help you plant good seeds and pull up any weeds that may have grown up around your soul. Feed the soil of your heart with the food of God's Word and ask the Holy Spirit to water it afresh every day. As long as you abide faithfully in the true vine, I guarantee you'll produce a crop of spiritual fruit that will make your heavenly Father proud.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , search my heart and try me and see if there is any wickedness in me. Replace all that is wrong in my character with the goodness in Yours. Plant the fruit of Your Spirit in me and cause it to flourish. Help me to abide in You, Jesus, so that I will bear fruit in my life. I invite You, Holy Spirit, to fill me afresh with Your _love_ today so that it will flow out of me and into the lives of others.\n\nYou said in Your Word to \"let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts\" (Colossians 3:15). I pray that Your _peace_ would rule my heart and mind to such a degree that people would sense it when they are around me. Help me to \"pursue the things which make for peace and the things by which one may edify another\" (Romans 14:19).\n\nGive me the _joy_ that knowing You produces. Make me _patient_ with others so that I reflect Your character to them. Help me to be _kind_ whenever there is opportunity for it, and may Your _goodness_ flow through me so that I will do good to everyone. Make me to be a _faithful_ person so that I can be trusted in all things. Help me to have the \"meekness and gentleness of Christ\" so that I will reflect Your _gentle_ spirit (2 Corinthians 10:1). Enable me to be _self-controlled_ in my thoughts, words, and habits.\n\nWhere I need to be pruned in order to bear more fruit, I submit myself to You. I know that without You I can do nothing. You are the vine and I am the branch. I must abide in You in order to bear fruit. Help me to do that. Thank You for Your promise that if I abide in You and Your Word abides in me, I can ask what I desire and it will be done for me (John 15:7). Thank You for Your promise that says if I ask I will receive (John 16:24). May I be like a tree planted by the rivers of Your living water so that I will bring forth fruit in season that won't wither (Psalm 1:3). In Jesus' name, I ask that the fruit of Your Spirit will grow in me and be recognized clearly by all who see me so that it glorifies You.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nThe fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering,  \nkindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness,  \nself-control. Against such there is no law.  \n **G ALATIANS 5:22-23**\n\nI am the true vine, and My Father is the vinedresser.  \nEvery branch in Me that does not bear fruit He takes  \naway; and every branch that bears fruit He prunes,  \nthat it may bear more fruit. You are already clean  \nbecause of the word which I have spoken to you.  \nAbide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot  \nbear fruit of itself, unless it abides in the vine,  \nneither can you, unless you abide in Me.  \nI am the vine, you are the branches. He who  \nabides in Me, and I in him, bears much fruit;  \nfor without Me you can do nothing. If anyone does  \nnot abide in Me, he is cast out as a branch and is  \nwithered; and they gather them and throw them into  \nthe fire, and they are burned. If you abide in Me,  \nand My words abide in you, you will ask what you  \ndesire, and it shall be done for you. By this  \nMy Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit;  \nso you will be My disciples.  \n **J OHN 15:1-8**\n\n##   CHAPTER THIRTEEN\n\n## [Lord, Preserve Me in Purity  \nand Holiness](contents.html#rechapter13)\n\nDon't let the title of this chapter intimidate you. Being holy is not being perfect. It's letting _Him_ who is holy be _in_ you. We can't be holy on our own, but we can make choices that allow holiness and purity to be manifested in our lives. We can separate ourselves from that which dilutes God's holiness in us and die to our lusts. And we are able to do this because \"those who are Christ's have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires\" (Galatians 5:24). We are not slaves to our flesh. We are able to live pure lives consecrated to the Lord.\n\nYou may have heard people say, \"I can't tell you exactly what pornography is, but I know it when I see it.\" Well, the opposite is true for holiness and purity. You may not be able to describe exactly what holiness is, but you know it when you _don't_ see it. Here are seven descriptions of what holiness is and how to know when you don't see it in yourself.\n\n### Seven Good Ways to Live in Holiness\n\n1. _Holiness means separating yourself from the world._ This doesn't mean you head for the hills, isolate yourself, and never speak to another nonbeliever. It means your heart detaches from the world's value system. You, instead, value the things God values above all else. The consequences for not doing so are serious. \"Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Whoever therefore wants to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God\" (James 4:4). Who wants to be God's enemy?\n\nI know it's hard to be separate from the world when you live in it. But if that is the desire of your heart, you can ask God to help you do it. Of course, you have to make choices to turn off certain TV programs, not go to certain movies, not read certain magazines, and not frequent certain places. \"Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world\u2014the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life\u2014is not of the Father but is of the world\" (1 John 2:15-16). Ask God to help you separate yourself from the things of the world, and learn to love _Him_ more than you love _it_.\n\n2. _Holiness means purifying yourself._ Purifying yourself does not mean putting on a white robe to cover up all that is not holy about you. It means asking God, who is holy, to purify your heart. Unholiness happens there first. Purifying ourselves means taking stock of our lives, thoughts, actions, associations, and business dealings, and cleansing ourselves from anything that contaminates us. It is something we _actively_ do. It means deciding to be morally and ethically pure. \"Everyone who has this hope in Him purifies himself, just as He is pure\" (1 John 3:3).\n\nWhen God said, \"Be holy\" (Leviticus 19:2), the commands He gave following that had to do with not stealing, not lying, not committing fraud, not slandering people, not trying to get revenge, and not falling into idolatry. It means that we are to take specific steps to see that we do not live an impure lifestyle. We are to deliberately turn away from anything that glorifies immorality and other unholiness. \"As He who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct, because it is written, 'Be holy, for I am holy' \" (1 Peter 1:15-16). Pray that you will be able to thoroughly search out and examine your ways, and turn to the Lord (Lamentations 3:40).\n\n3. _Holiness means living in the Spirit and not in the flesh._ Our fleshly thoughts will disqualify us as much as our actions. Are we jealous of anyone? Do we have strife? Is there unresolved division in our lives? Do we willfully allow sin a place? If so, then we are living in the flesh. And it will destroy us. \"For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit, the things of the Spirit. For to be carnally minded is death, but to be spiritually minded is life and peace. Because the carnal mind is enmity against God; for it is not subject to the law of God, nor indeed can be. So then, those who are in the flesh cannot please God\" (Romans 8:5-8).\n\nWhen you look honestly at the fruit of your life, you can see by what you are reaping whether you have sown to the flesh or to the Spirit. \"Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap. For he who sows to his flesh will of the flesh reap corruption, but he who sows to the Spirit will of the Spirit reap everlasting life\" (Galatians 6:7-8). Pray that God will help you live in the Spirit and not the flesh.\n\n4. _Holiness means staying clear of sexual immorality._ The greatest lie our society has blindly accepted is that sexual sin is okay. It must grieve the Holy Spirit to see how women sell themselves short of all God has for them because they have bought into this lie. For example, a self-deceived generation believes that oral sex with someone they aren't married to is not actually sex at all, so therefore they can indulge their flesh and not reap any consequences. \"There is a generation that is pure in its own eyes, yet is not washed from its filthiness\" (Proverbs 30:12). While they may be safe from conceiving a baby, they will conceive death in their souls and then wonder why after they are married the passion in their marriage dies. Holiness means not falling prey to fashion or trends of thought or deed. \"For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you should abstain from sexual immorality; that each of you should know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, not in passion of lust, like the Gentiles who do not know God\" (1 Thessalonians 4:3-5). Ask God to keep you sexually pure in your mind, soul, and body.\n\n5. _Holiness means being sanctified by Jesus._ Once we have received Jesus, we can't continue to live our old sinful lifestyle. Now that we have Him living in us and the Holy Spirit filling us and transforming us, we have no excuse. \"We have been sanctified through the offering of the body of Jesus Christ once for all\" (Hebrews 10:10). \"For by one offering He has perfected forever those who are being sanctified\" (Hebrews 10:14). This doesn't mean we don't have to be concerned about sin anymore and can do whatever we want because He took care of it. It means we must _continue_ to dwell with Him and ask God to help us live in all He bought for us on the cross.\n\n6. _Holiness means walking close to God._ When we do not pursue a close walk with God and a lifestyle of purity and peace, we are unable to see the Lord with any kind of clarity. \"Pursue peace with all people, and holiness, without which no one will see the Lord\" (Hebrews 12:14). Esteeming the holiness of God and living in purity is the only way we are able to be close to Him. \"Who may ascend into the hill of the LORD? Or who may stand in His holy place? He who has clean hands and a pure heart, who has not lifted up his soul to an idol, nor sworn deceitfully\" (Psalm 24:3-4). \"By those who come near Me I must be regarded as holy; and before all the people I must be glorified\" (Leviticus 10:3). There is nothing more important than being close to God.\n\nThere comes a time in all of our lives when we are _desperate_ to know that God is close and that He hears our prayers and will answer. We won't have time to _get_ right with God; we will have to _be_ right with God. \"The LORD has set apart for Himself him who is godly; the LORD will hear when I call to Him\" (Psalm 4:3). Now is the time to start living righteous, pure, and holy lives if we want to see our prayers answered in the future.\n\n7. _Holiness means letting God keep you._ Holiness is not something you slip in and out of like a nightgown. Holiness is God's will for our lives, and something God has planned for us from the beginning. \"Just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love, having predestined us to adoption as sons by Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the good pleasure of His will\" (Ephesians 1:4-5). God has made a way for us to live in holiness. And He is able to _keep_ us holy. When our heart wants to live in purity and do the right thing, God will keep us from falling into sin.\n\nWhen Abraham told King Abimelech that Sarah was his sister instead of telling him that she was his wife, Abimelech took her into his own house. But in a dream God told Abimelech that he would soon be a dead man because he had taken another man's wife. Abimelech said, \"In the integrity of my heart and innocence of my hands I have done this\" (Genesis 20:5).\n\nGod replied to Abimelech, \"Yes, I know that you did this in the integrity of your heart. For I also withheld you from sinning against Me; therefore I did not let you touch her\" (Genesis 20:6).\n\nWhen we live right, God will _keep_ us from sin.\n\nIt is only by the grace of God that we can live in holiness, even after we have chosen to do so. That's because God enables us to do what He asks us to do. But we still need to _ask_ Him to do it. God wants to know that His holiness is important enough to us to seek after it. People are drawn to holiness because it is attractive, even though they may resist it in their own lives. Ask God to enhance your beauty with the beauty of His holiness.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , You have said in Your Word that You did not call me to uncleanness, but in holiness (1 Thessalonians 4:7). You chose me to be holy and blameless before You. I know that I have been washed clean and made holy by the blood of Jesus (1 Corinthians 6:11). You have clothed me in Your righteousness and enabled me to put on the new man \"in true righteousness and holiness\" (Ephesians 4:24). Continue to purify me by the power of Your Spirit. Help me to \"cling to what is good\" (Romans 12:9) and keep myself pure (1 Timothy 5:22).\n\nLord, help me to separate myself from anything that is not holy. I don't want to waste my life on things that have no value. Give me discernment to recognize that which is worthless and remove myself from it. Help me not to give myself to impure things, but rather to those things that fulfill Your plans for my life. Enable me to do what it takes to get everything rooted out of my life that is not Your best for me, so I can live the way You want me to live. Show me how to tear down any idols in my life and eliminate any sources of unholy thoughts, such as TV, movies, books, videos, and magazines, that do not glorify You. Help me to examine my ways so that I can return to Your ways wherever I have strayed. Enable me to take any steps necessary in order to be pure before You.\n\nLord, I want to be holy as You are holy. Make me a partaker of Your holiness (Hebrews 12:10), and may my spirit, soul, and body be kept blameless (1 Thessalonians 5:23). I know that You have called me to purity and holiness and You have said that \"He who calls you is faithful, who will also do it\" (1 Thessalonians 5:24). Thank You that You will keep me pure and holy so I will be fully prepared for all You have for me.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nHe chose us in Him before the foundation of the  \nworld, that we should be holy and without  \nblame before Him in love.  \n **E PHESIANS 1:4**\n\nBlessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.  \n **M ATTHEW 5:8**\n\nIn a great house there are not only vessels of gold  \nand silver, but also of wood and clay, some for honor  \nand some for dishonor. Therefore if anyone cleanses  \nhimself from the latter, he will be a vessel for honor,  \nsanctified and useful for the Master,  \nprepared for every good work.  \n **2 T IMOTHY 2:20-21**\n\nTherefore, having these promises, beloved, let us  \ncleanse ourselves from all filthiness of the flesh and  \nspirit, perfecting holiness in the fear of God.  \n **2 C ORINTHIANS 7:1**\n\nA highway shall be there, and a road, and it shall be  \ncalled the Highway of Holiness. The unclean shall  \nnot pass over it, but it shall be for others. Whoever  \nwalks the road, although a fool, shall not go astray.  \nNo lion shall be there, nor shall any ravenous  \nbeast go up on it; it shall not be found there. But the  \nredeemed shall walk there. And the ransomed of the  \nLORD shall return, and come to Zion with singing,  \nwith everlasting joy on their heads. They shall  \nobtain joy and gladness, and sorrow and  \nsighing shall flee away.  \n **I SAIAH 35:8-10**\n\n##   CHAPTER FOURTEEN\n\n## [Lord, Move Me into the  \nPurpose for Which I  \nWas Created](contents.html#rechapter14)\n\nWhen my children were growing up, I frequently prayed they would have a sense of who God made them to be and what their purpose was. I had observed so many young people floundering around and wasting their lives because they had no idea they were called to something great in the Lord. I had done the same thing when I was young, and I ended up in serious trouble. I certainly wanted more than that for my children. As a result of those prayers, I have never seen my children without a sense of purpose. Now that they are in their 20s, they continue to move in their gifts and their paths are becoming more and more clear. They don't know the exact details of their future, but they each know that they have one and that it is good.\n\nWhen I wrote _The Power of a Praying \u00ae Parent_ and shared my many years of experiences in praying for children, I received a large volume of mail from people telling me how they wished they'd had someone praying for them like that when they were growing up. They now feared they had wasted too many years trying to figure out what they were supposed to be doing and missed the purpose God had for their lives. I encouraged them with this good news. \"No matter how far off the path you have gotten from the plans and purposes God has for you, when you surrender your life to the Lord and declare your utter dependence upon Him, He carves a path from where you are to where you are supposed to be, and He sets you on it. It may take you longer than it would have taken had you been on the right path from the beginning, but if you keep walking closely with God, He will get you where you are supposed to be.\"\n\nDon't ever think it's too late for you. The Bible says, \"The gifts and the calling of God are irrevocable\" (Romans 11:29). That means the gifts and abilities He gives to you He doesn't take back. They won't be recalled, repealed, or annulled. You will always have your gifts. However, this is not true of the anointing. The anointing is the presence and touch of God upon your gifts that gives them supernatural power to penetrate darkness and bring life and light. This spiritual touch of the Holy Spirit can be lost through sin without repentance. We've all seen people who have fallen into immorality, yet they kept on using their gifts without recognizing that the anointing was gone. They had been so deceived and their sin had so blinded them that they didn't even realize what it was they had lost.\n\n### Everyone Has a Purpose\n\nEach one of us has a purpose in the Lord. But many of us don't realize that. And when we don't have an accurate understanding of our identity, we either strive to be like someone else or something we're not. We compare ourselves to others and feel as though we always fall short. When we don't become who _we_ think we're _supposed_ to be, it makes us critical of ourselves and our lives. It causes us to be insecure, oversensitive, judgmental, frustrated, and unfulfilled. We become self-absorbed, constantly having to think about ourselves and what we _should_ be. It forces us to try too hard to make life happen the way we think it is supposed to. In the extreme, it makes us tell lies about ourselves and become dishonest about who we really are. When you are around people who don't have any idea of what they are called to do, you sense their unrest, unfulfillment, anxiety, and lack of peace.\n\nGod doesn't want that for you. He wants you to have a clear vision for your life. He wants to reveal to you what your gifts and talents are and show you how to best develop them and use them for His glory.\n\n### Know Who You Are and Where You Are Going\n\nPredestination means your destination has already been determined. The Bible says we are predestined according to God's purposes and will (Ephesians 1:11). That means God knows where you are supposed to be going. And He knows how to get you there. But even though you have a purpose and a destiny, you can't get to it without being connected to the one who gave it to you in the first place. When you don't stay connected to the one who planned your destiny, then in one moment of weakness, such as passion or anger, you can sell it out. We see people on the news all the time who do that. When you clearly understand that God has a high purpose for your life, you won't throw it away with a foolish decision. You won't allow insecurity to ruin your life.\n\nIt doesn't seem fair that insecurity is sin. That's like hitting someone when they are down. But insecurity is a lack of faith. And a lack of faith is sin, because it signifies a lack of trust in God. When we are insecure about who we are and what our purpose is, it means we don't trust God with our lives. We don't believe that what He says about us in His word is true. Insecurity causes us to focus on ourselves and what _we_ want, instead of focusing on Him and what _He_ wants.\n\nWe all want to accomplish something significant with our lives. And we all have the potential to do something great. That's because we are the Lord's and His Spirit dwells in us. Because of His greatness _in_ us, He can accomplish great things _through_ us. We just have to remember not to confuse success in the eyes of men as being the same as success in the eyes of God. Men and women of the world glory in their accomplishments. Children of God glory in the Lord. \"Let not the wise man glory in his wisdom, let not the mighty man glory in his might, nor let the rich man glory in his riches; but let him who glories glory in this, that he understands and knows Me\" (Jeremiah 9:23-24). When you know you are the Lord's and you trust where He is taking you, you feel very secure.\n\n### Surrender Your Dreams\n\nI have found that we can never move into all God has for us and become all He created us to be without surrendering our dreams to Him. Jesus said, \"Whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it\" (Matthew 16:25). That means if we want to have a life that is secure in the Lord, we have to let go of _our_ plans and say, \"Not my will, but _Yours_ be done, Lord.\" This is hard to do, because letting go of our dreams is the last thing we want to do. But we have to ask Him to take away the dreams in our heart that are not of Him and bring to pass the ones that are.\n\nIf you have a dream that is not of God, when you surrender it to Him He will take away your desire for it and give you what _He_ has for you. This can be very painful, especially if it is a dream you've been clinging to for a long time. But you don't want to spend your life chasing after a dream that God will not bless. You will be constantly frustrated if you do, and it will never be realized. You want to be living the dreams God puts in your heart.\n\nEven if the dreams you have in your heart are from God, you will still have to surrender them. That's because God wants you clinging to _Him_ and not to your dreams. He doesn't want you trying to make them happen. He wants you to trust _Him_ , and _He'll_ make them happen.\n\n### Finding Your Purpose\n\nWe all need to have a sense of why we are here. We all need to know we were created for a purpose. We will never find fulfillment and happiness until we are doing the thing for which we were created. But God won't move us into the big things He has called us to unless we have been proven faithful in the small things He has given us. So if you are doing what you deem to be small things right now, rejoice! God's getting you ready for big things ahead.\n\nDon't think for a moment that if you haven't moved into the purposes God has for you by now that it's too late. It is _never_ too late. I did everything late. I didn't come to the Lord until I was 28. I got married late, had children late, and didn't even start writing professionally until I was over 40. My whole ministry happened when I was in my 40s and most of it in my 50s. Trust me, if you are still breathing, God has a purpose for you. He has something for you to do _now_.\n\nIf you are not sure what God wants you to do, start as an intercessor. We are all called to pray for others. Start by serving in your church. We are all called to submit ourselves to a body of believers and help others. When we are faithful in these things, He moves us into others.\n\nKeep in mind that God \"has saved us and called us with a holy calling, not according to our works, but according to His own purpose and grace which was given to us in Christ Jesus before time began\" (2 Timothy 1:9). \"Having then gifts differing according to the grace that is given to us, let us use them\" (Romans 12:6). For \"each one has his own gift from God, one in this manner and another in that\" (1 Corinthians 7:7). So then, \"as God has distributed to each one, as the Lord has called each one, so let him walk\" (1 Corinthians 7:17).\n\nI pray that God will \"give to you the spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of Him, the eyes of your understanding being enlightened; that you may know what is the hope of His calling\" (Ephesians 1:17-18). \"May He grant you according to your heart's desire, and fulfill all your purpose\" (Psalm 20:4).\n\nMay you never forget, dear sister, that God has an important purpose for your life and that it is good.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , I thank You that You have called me with a holy calling, not according to my works, but according to Your purpose and grace which was given to me in Christ Jesus (2 Timothy 1:9). I know that Your plan for me existed before I knew You, and You will bring it to pass. Help me to \"walk worthy of the calling with which [I was] called\" (Ephesians 4:1). I know there is an appointed plan for me, and I have a destiny that will now be fulfilled.\n\nHelp me to live my life with a sense of purpose and understanding of the calling You have given me. I lay down all pride, selfishness, and anything else that would keep me from moving into all You have for me. I don't want to miss out on Your full purpose for my life because I did not walk the way You wanted me to. I repent of every day I haven't fully lived for You. Help me to live the way You want me to from now on.\n\nLord, help me to understand the call You have on my life. Take away any discouragement I may feel and replace it with joyful anticipation of what You are going to do through me. Use me as Your instrument to make a positive difference in the lives of those whom You put in my path. Help me to rest in the confidence of knowing that Your timing is perfect. I know that whatever You have called me to do, You will enable me to do it.\n\nI pray that nothing will draw me away from fulfilling the plan You have for me. May I never stray from what You have called me to be and do. Give me a vision for my life and a strong sense of purpose. I put my identity in You and my destiny in Your hands. Show me if what I am doing now is what I am supposed to be doing. I want what You are building in my life to last for eternity. I don't want to waste time going after things that are not what You have for me. Help me to be content where I am, knowing You won't leave me there forever.\n\nLord, I know that \"all things work together for good\" to those who love You and are called according to Your purpose (Romans 8:28). I don't want to presume that I know what that purpose is. Nor do I want to spend a lifetime trying to figure out what I am supposed to be doing and miss the mark. So I pray that You would show me clearly what the gifts and talents are that You have placed in me. Lead me in the way I should go as I grow in them. Enable me to use them according to Your will and for Your glory.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nWalk worthy of the calling with which you were  \ncalled, with all lowliness and gentleness, with  \nlongsuffering, bearing with one another in love,  \nendeavoring to keep the unity of the Spirit  \nin the bond of peace.  \n **E PHESIANS 4:1-3**\n\nBe even more diligent to make your call and  \nelection sure, for if you do these things  \nyou will never stumble.  \n **2 P ETER 1:10**\n\nYou are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a  \nholy nation, His own special people, that you may  \nproclaim the praises of Him who called you  \nout of darkness into His marvelous light.  \n **1 P ETER 2:9**\n\nIn Him also we have obtained an inheritance, being  \npredestined according to the purpose of Him who  \nworks all things according to the counsel of  \nHis will, that we who first trusted in Christ  \nshould be to the praise of His glory.  \n **E PHESIANS 1:11-12**\n\nWhom He predestined, these He also called; whom  \nHe called, these He also justified; and whom He  \njustified, these He also glorified.  \n **R OMANS 8:30**\n\n##   CHAPTER FIFTEEN\n\n## [Lord, Guide Me in All  \nMy Relationships](contents.html#rechapter15)\n\nI once heard a radio interview with some gang members in Los Angeles. At the time crime was extremely high in that city due to a terrifying wave of random drive-by shootings and murders perpetrated by gang members. These boys\u2014some barely teenagers and some in their early 20s\u2014said the main reason they joined their gang was to have a sense of belonging. In a chilling statement a number of them admitted they would do whatever it took to ensure they were accepted and esteemed by the group. Even commit murder.\n\nSome of the boys revealed that the test of whether they could even be accepted into the gang was to go out and kill someone. There was no other reason for the murder other than to complete the initiation requirement and prove that they would do anything for the group. Some confessed how much they hated doing it and wished there had been another alternative. But they were desperate to belong to a family, so they went ahead with it. This was a frightening revelation to all of us who lived there, because it meant no place was safe.\n\nAround that same time, a friend of ours was out in front of his own home in broad daylight and was approached by two such young boys. They were walking down the street, which was in a very nice and quiet residential neighborhood, when one of the boys pulled out a gun, shot our friend point-blank and fled. There was no robbery or attempt to commit any other crime. Our friend must have had angels watching over him, because he lived through it. Most people involved in such incidents didn't. But the damage to his body greatly affected his ability to do the work he was an expert in doing, and it took him years to recover.\n\nThese young boys in the interview had no sense of purpose for their lives outside of belonging to a gang. Most of them were raised without fathers and in some cases the mother was absent too. I'm sure that if each of them would have had a strong sense of family, and love and acceptance from other people, they would not have chosen this destructive lifestyle. This illustrates how desperately people need people. When young people are deprived of good, godly relationships, they will seek those that aren't. That's how gangs are formed.\n\nWe _all_ desperately need a sense of family, of relationship, of belonging. If you don't realize that about yourself, it's probably because you have always had it. God created us to be in families. We have a natural hunger to be a part of something that gives us a sense of acceptance, affirmation, and being needed and appreciated. But even if we have never received that from our own biological families, there is good news. God sets us in _spiritual_ families. In many ways these can be just as important.\n\n### The Importance of Having a Spiritual Family\n\nGod is our Father. We are God's kids. That means we who are believers in Jesus are all brothers and sisters. There are too many of us to all live in the same house, so God puts us in separate houses. We call them churches. Our relationships within these church families are crucial to our well-being. How we relate to the other people there will greatly affect the quality of our life in the Lord. We can never reach our full destiny apart from the people God puts in our lives. I don't mean they will necessarily help us do what we do, but our relationships with them will contribute to our success.\n\nIt's important to be yoked with people who walk closely with God. Accountability results from having close relationships with strong believers who are themselves accountable to other strong believers. It's important to be accountable because we are all capable of being deceived. We all have blind spots. We need people who will help us see the truth about ourselves and our lives. And we need to have the kind of relationships that don't break down when truth is spoken in love.\n\nThis doesn't mean that you will never have a problem in any of your church relationships or that if you do it's a sign that you are in the wrong place. _All_ relationships have things that need to be worked out. Getting beyond those problems are what make relationships rich. But we have to learn to protect our relationships with our spiritual family in prayer.\n\nYour enemy doesn't want you to be in a spiritual family or have godly relationships. That's because he knows how beneficial they are for you. He knows that without a spiritual family you won't grow properly. He knows if you are not joined and committed to a spiritual family, you will end up living in rebellion in some way whether you mean to or not. He knows you will never be all God created you to be if you are not connected to a spiritual family. That's why he will try to break apart your relationships. And that's why you should cover them in prayer.\n\n### More Than Just Friends\n\nSo much is made of the importance of the right kind of friends in the Bible that we can't treat this part of our lives lightly. \"The righteous should choose his friends carefully, for the way of the wicked leads them astray\" (Proverbs 12:26). If it's true that we become like the friends we spend time with, then we must select our friends wisely. The main quality to look for in a close friend is not how attractive, talented, wealthy, smart, influential, clever, or popular they are. It's how much they love and fear God. The person who will do what it takes to live in the perfect will of God is the kind of friend who imparts something of the goodness of the Lord to you every time you are with them.\n\nGod doesn't want us to be unequally yoked with unbelievers, but that doesn't mean we should have nothing to do with anyone who doesn't know the Lord. Far from it. We are God's tool to reach others for His kingdom. But our closest relationships, the ones that influence us the most, need to be with people who love and fear God. If you don't have close friends who are believers, pray for godly and desirable friends to come into your life.\n\n### Seven Good Signs of a Desirable Friend\n\n1. _A desirable friend tells you the truth in love_. \"Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful\" (Proverbs 27:6).\n\n2. _A desirable friend gives you sound advice_. \"Ointment and perfume delight the heart, and the sweetness of a man's friend gives delight by hearty counsel\" (Proverbs 27:9).\n\n3. _A desirable friend refines you_. \"As iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend\" (Proverbs 27:17).\n\n4. _A desirable friend helps you grow in wisdom_. \"He who walks with wise men will be wise, but the companion of fools will be destroyed\" (Proverbs 13:20).\n\n5. _A desirable friend stays close to you_. \"A man who has friends must himself be friendly, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother\" (Proverbs 18:24).\n\n6. _A desirable friend loves you and stands by you_. \"A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity\" (Proverbs 17:17).\n\n7. _A desirable friend is a help in time of trouble_. \"Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, for he has no one to help him up\" (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10).\n\nIf you have friends with these qualities, protect those friendships with prayer. If you have friends who have less than desirable qualities, you need to pray about those as well.\n\n### Seven Signs of an _Undesirable_ Friend\n\n1. _An undesirable friend is immoral and has no regard for others_. \"I have written to you not to keep company with anyone named a brother, who is sexually immoral, or covetous, or an idolater, or a reviler, or a drunkard, or an extortioner\u2014not even to eat with such a person\" (1 Corinthians 5:11).\n\n2. _An undesirable friend is changeable and unstable_. \"Do not associate with those given to change; for their calamity will rise suddenly, and who knows the ruin those two can bring?\" (Proverbs 24:21-22).\n\n3. _An undesirable friend is frequently angry_. \"Make no friendship with an angry man, and with a furious man do not go, lest you learn his ways and set a snare for your soul\" (Proverbs 22:24-25).\n\n4. _An undesirable friend gives ungodly counsel_. \"Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor stands in the path of sinners, nor sits in the seat of the scornful\" (Psalm 1:1).\n\n5. _An undesirable friend is a lawless unbeliever_. \"Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness? And what accord has Christ with Belial? Or what part has a believer with an unbeliever?\" (2 Corinthians 6:14-15).\n\n6. _An undesirable friend is a fool_. \"He who walks with wise men will be wise, but the companion of fools will be destroyed\" (Proverbs 13:20).\n\n7. _An undesirable friend is irreverent toward God and His laws_. \"I am a companion of all who fear You, and of those who keep Your precepts\" (Psalm 119:63).\n\nIf you have friends with such characteristics as these, ask God to send you new friends while you pray for the old ones to be transformed.\n\n### Pray for Your Relationships\n\nSevere injuries to relationships can often be fatal. Even if they aren't completely destroyed, relational injuries can take years to heal. It's easier to _protect_ them in prayer than it is to _fix_ them. The way we learned to cope, survive, or interact in our relationships when we were growing up will be carried with us into adulthood and affect every one of our important or close relationships now. And it could be exactly how the devil will try to destroy them. Ask God to make you a good friend to others and give you a pure and loving heart in all your relationships. Pray especially for the people you live with. The Bible says that \"every . . . house divided against itself will not stand\" (Matthew 12:25). You can't have peace if you are living in discord with anyone in your home.\n\nDon't leave your relationships to chance. Pray for godly people to come into your life with whom you can connect. Don't _force_ relationships to happen, _pray_ for them to happen. Then when they do, nurture them with prayer. This doesn't mean you have to have large numbers of friends. There is great strength in small numbers when the people involved are strong in the Lord. The quality of your relationships is more important than the quantity.\n\nThroughout your whole life relationships will be crucial to your well-being. It is not emotionally or spiritually healthy to be isolated. Right relationships will enrich and balance you and give you a healthy perspective. Godly people will help you walk in the right direction, and the good in them will rub off on you. The quality of your relationships will determine the quality of your life. And this is something worth praying about.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , I lift up every one of my relationships to You and ask You to bless them. I pray that each one would be glorifying to You. Help me to choose my friends wisely so I won't be led astray. Give me discernment and strength to separate myself from anyone who is not a good influence. I release all my relationships to You and pray that Your will be done in each one of them.\n\nWith my most difficult relationships, I ask that Your peace would reign in them. Specifically I lift up to You my relationship with (name a difficult friend). I know two can't walk together unless they are agreed (Amos 3:3), so help us to find a place of agreement, unity, and like-mindedness. Where either of us needs to change, I pray that You would change us. Break down any \"wall of separation\" (Ephesians 2:13-15) or misunderstanding. I release this person into Your hands and ask that You would make our relationship what You want it to be so that it will glorify You.\n\nI pray for my relationship with each of my family members. Specifically, I pray for my relationship with (name the family member with whom you are most concerned). I pray You would bring healing, reconciliation, and restoration where it is needed. Bless our relationship and make it strong.\n\nI pray for any relationships I have with people who don't know You, Lord. Give me words to say that will turn their hearts toward You. Help me to be Your light to them. Specifically I pray for (name an unbeliever or someone who has walked away from God). Soften this person's heart to open her (his) eyes to receive You and follow You faithfully.\n\nI pray for godly friends, role models, and mentors to come into my life. Send people who will speak the truth in love. I pray especially that there will be women in my life who are trustworthy, kind, loving, and faithful. Most of all I pray that they be women of strong faith who will add to my life and I to theirs. May we mutually raise the standards to which we aspire. May forgiveness and love flow freely between us. Make me to be Your light in all my relationships.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nYou are no longer strangers and foreigners, but fellow  \ncitizens with the saints and members of the  \nhousehold of God, having been built on the  \nfoundation of the apostles and prophets, Jesus Christ  \nHimself being the chief cornerstone, in whom the  \nwhole building, being joined together, grows into a  \nholy temple in the Lord, in whom you also are  \nbeing built together for a dwelling place  \nof God in the Spirit.  \n **E PHESIANS 2:19-22**\n\nGod sets the solitary in families; He brings out those  \nwho are bound into prosperity; but the  \nrebellious dwell in a dry land.  \n **P SALM 68:6**\n\nLet all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil  \nspeaking be put away from you, with all malice. And  \nbe kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one  \nanother, just as God in Christ forgave you.  \n **E PHESIANS 4:31-32**\n\nWe should no longer be children, tossed to and fro  \nand carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the  \ntrickery of men, in the cunning craftiness of deceitful  \nplotting, but, speaking the truth in love,  \nmay grow up in all things into Him who is the  \nhead\u2014Christ\u2014from whom the whole body,  \njoined and knit together by what every joint supplies,  \naccording to the effective working by which every  \npart does its share, causes growth of the body for  \nthe edifying of itself in love.  \n **E PHESIANS 4:14-16**\n\n##   CHAPTER SIXTEEN\n\n## [Lord, Keep Me in the Center  \nof Your Will](contents.html#rechapter16)\n\nWhen my children and I walked through the rubble of our house in Northridge, California, not long after the Northridge earthquake of 1993 had destroyed it, we all wept. We knew that if we'd been in the house at the time, we might not have lived through that earthquake. We all loved that great house and had hated to leave it when we moved just months before. A lot of prayer and inner struggle went into the decision to relocate to another state, but we were certain it was God's leading. We had not even sold the house before we moved because we felt we were to leave right away. Had we not sought the will of God for our lives and followed it, even with reluctance, we would have been there when the earthquake happened.\n\nGod's will is a place of safety. I'm not saying that anyone who was in California during the earthquake was out of the will of God. But, I believe that _we_ would have been. And I believe that the reason the house had not sold is that anyone who was in it at the time would have been seriously injured or killed. When we walk in the will of God, we find safety. When we live outside of God's will, we forfeit His protection.\n\nWe all want to be in the center of God's will. That's why we shouldn't pursue a career, a move to another place, or any major life change without the knowledge that it is the will of God. We must regularly ask God to show us what His will is and lead us in it. We must ask Him to speak to our heart so He can tell us. \"Your ears shall hear a word behind you, saying, 'This is the way, walk in it,' whenever you turn to the right hand or whenever you turn to the left\" (Isaiah 30:21). My family and I will always be grateful that we listened to God and followed His leading.\n\n### Four Good Things That Are True About God's Will\n\n1. _Following God's will does not mean we will never have trouble._ Trouble is a part of life. Having fulfillment and peace in the midst of trouble is what living in God's will is all about. There is great confidence in knowing that you are walking in the will of God and doing what He wants you to do. When you are sure of that, you can better deal with what life brings you. So don't think that trouble in your life means you are out of God's will. God uses the trouble you have to perfect you. There is a big difference between being out of God's will and being pruned or tested by God. Both are uncomfortable, but one leads to life and one doesn't. In one you will have peace, no matter how uncomfortable it gets. In the other, you won't.\n\n2. _Following God's will is not easy_. The life of Jesus confirms that following God's will is not always fun, enjoyable, pleasant, and easy. Jesus was doing God's will when He went to the cross. He said, \"For I have come down from heaven, not to do My own will, but the will of Him who sent Me\" (John 6:38). If anyone could have said, \"I don't want to follow God's will today,\" I think it would have been Him. But He did it perfectly. And now He will enable us to do it too.\n\n3. _Following God's will can make you very uncomfortable_. In fact, if you don't ever feel stretched or uncomfortable in your walk with the Lord, then I would question whether you are actually _in_ the will of God. It has been my personal experience that stretched and uncomfortable is a way of life when walking in the will of God.\n\n4. _Following God's will doesn't happen automatically._ That's because God gave us a choice as to whether we subject our will to Him or not. We make that decision every day. Will we _seek_ His will? Will we _ask_ Him for wisdom? Will we _do_ what He says? \"Do not be unwise, but understand what the will of the Lord is\" (Ephesians 5:17). God's will is the way we choose to live each day of our lives.\n\nGod doesn't want you to live your life for the lusts of the flesh, \"but for the will of God\" (1 Peter 4:2). He wants to \"make you complete in every good work to do His will, working in you what is well pleasing in His sight\" (Hebrews 13:21). \"For it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure\" (Philippians 2:13). I pray that in everything you do \"you may stand perfect and complete in all the will of God\" (Colossians 4:12).\n\nThe best place to start seeking God's will for your life is \"in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you\" (1 Thessalonians 5:18). Thank Him for keeping you in the center of His will. Then ask Him to guide your every step. It feels so good to be confident you are on the right path and doing what God _wants_ that I know you will do whatever it takes to experience it.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , I pray You will fill me with the \"knowledge of [Your] will in all wisdom and spiritual understanding\" (Colossians 1:9). Help me to walk in a worthy manner, fully pleasing to You, being fruitful in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of Your ways. Guide my every step. Lead me \"in Your righteousness\" and \"make Your way straight before my face\" (Psalm 5:8). As I draw close and walk in intimate relationship with You each day, I pray You will get me where I need to go.\n\nEven as Jesus said, \"Not My will, but Yours, be done\" (Luke 22:42), so I say to You, not _my_ will but _Your_ will be done in my life. \"I delight to do Your will, O my God\" (Psalm 40:8). You are more important to me than anything. Your will is more important to me than my desires. I want to live as Your servant, doing Your will from my heart (Ephesians 6:6).\n\nLord, align my heart with Yours. Help me to hear Your voice saying, \"This is the way, walk in it.\" If I am doing anything outside of Your will, show me. Speak to me from Your Word so that I will have understanding. Show me any area of my life where I am not right on target. If there is something I should be doing, reveal it to me so that I can correct my course. I want to do only what You want me to do.\n\nLord, I know we are not to direct our own steps (Jeremiah 10:23). So I pray _You_ would direct my steps. Only You know the way I should go. I don't want to get off the path You want me to walk on and end up in the wrong place. I want to move into all You have for me and become all You made me to be by walking in Your perfect will for my life now.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nNot everyone who says to Me, \"Lord, Lord,\" shall  \nenter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does  \nthe will of My Father in heaven.  \n **M ATTHEW 7:21**\n\nYou have need of endurance, so that after you have  \ndone the will of God,  \nyou may receive the promise.  \n **H EBREWS 10:36**\n\nFor it is better, if it is the will of God,  \nto suffer for doing good than for doing evil.  \n **1 P ETER 3:17**\n\nTherefore let those who suffer according to the will  \nof God commit their souls to Him in doing good, as  \nto a faithful Creator.  \n **1 P ETER 4:19**\n\nThe world is passing away, and the lust of it;  \nbut he who does the will of God abides forever.  \n **1 J OHN 2:17**\n\n##   CHAPTER SEVENTEEN\n\n## [Lord, Protect Me and All I  \nCare About](contents.html#rechapter17)\n\nRecently I had the privilege of staying in a high-rise condominium right on the beach. This particular unit was on the top floor, and one entire side of it\u2014which included the bedroom, living room, and dining area\u2014was all glass and overlooked the ocean. The view was breathtaking.\n\nThe first morning I awakened there, I opened up the curtains and crawled back into bed to gaze out over the ocean and jot down some thoughts on a notepad. Because the condo was so high, I couldn't see anything but ocean and sky from where I was sitting. In order to have seen the sand of the beach, I would have had to go into the living room and walk out on the balcony to look over the edge.\n\nI was deep in thought, lost in the blue of the sky and ocean, when suddenly a large airplane flew by my window at eye level. It was over the water but it seemed very close. The sudden appearance of something so loud and enormous nearly caused my heart to stop. I felt a surge of panic and fright so severe that it sent a sharp pain throughout my chest. I was terrified by what I saw and shocked at my reaction. I don't know when I have ever responded so violently to something that was not really a threat. But it was so unexpected, and I had never dreamed of seeing a plane at eye level. I felt utterly vulnerable. I realized at that very moment the only thing standing between me and instant death was the hand of God and a pilot who was a decent human being.\n\nBefore September 11, a plane coming in my window was not a thought that would have ever entered my mind. But actually that possibility was always there, whether I realized it or not. I began to wonder about how many other potentially dangerous things are around us every day. Things we don't see until the plans of evil explode them in our lives. Dangers we can't even imagine until they come crashing in upon us, changing us forever.\n\nPersonally, I believe our heavenly Father looks out for us and protects us from danger far more than we realize. But it's not something we can take for granted. It's something we must pray about often.\n\nPart of being protected by God has to do with obeying Him and living in His will. When we don't do either of those things, we come out from under the umbrella of His covering. We don't hear His voice telling us which way to go. How many times would people have been spared from something disastrous if they had only asked God to show them what to do and then obeyed Him? Or if they had only just been listening?\n\nI remember traveling one time in my four-wheel-drive vehicle a few days after a freezing snowstorm. Slowly approaching a red light at a busy intersection, I put my foot on the brake but nothing happened. I had hit a patch of black ice that was completely invisible. The intersection consisted of narrow two-lane highways crossing one another, with deep water-drainage ditches on either side. There were cars going both ways across the intersection in front of me, and I realized my car was entirely out of control and I couldn't stop.\n\n\"Jesus, help me,\" I prayed. I tried my best to maintain control over the car and keep it from flipping over into one of the ditches on either side of me. In an effort to do that, however, I spun out in the center of the intersection. Cars dodged all around me as they tried to maintain control as well. One green car was headed directly toward me, and I don't even know how I missed hitting it, except to say that I was praying fervently at the time and the hand of God must have intervened. It was miraculous that nothing happened to me or anyone else. Before I had left home that day, I prayed specifically that God would keep me safe. There is no doubt in my mind that He answered that prayer.\n\nIn those precarious moments, when your future is hanging in the balance, you want the confidence of knowing you have been communicating with your heavenly Father all along and He has His eye on you. These are the times, such as what I experienced, when you need a prayer answered instantly. But in order to be sure that happens, you must be praying every day. God is a place of safety you can run to, but it helps if you are running to Him on a daily basis so that you are in familiar territory. The Bible says, \"In the fear of the LORD there is strong confidence, and His children will have a place of refuge. The fear of the LORD is a fountain of life, to turn one away from the snares of death\" (Proverbs 14:26-27). When we have our eyes on _God_ , He keeps an eye on _us_.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , I pray for Your hand of protection to be upon me. Keep me safe from any accidents, diseases, or evil influences. Protect me wherever I go. Keep me safe in planes, cars, or any other means of transportation. I trust in Your Word, which assures me that You are my rock, my fortress, my deliverer, my shield, my stronghold, and my strength in whom I trust.\n\nLord, I want to dwell in Your secret place and abide in Your shadow (Psalm 91:1). Keep me under the umbrella of Your protection. Help me never to stray from the center of Your will or off the path You have for me. Enable me to always hear Your voice guiding me. Send Your angels to keep charge over me and keep me in all my ways. May they bear me up, so that I will not even stumble (Psalm 91:12). You, Lord, are my refuge and strength and \"a very present help in trouble.\" Therefore I will not fear, \"even though the earth be removed and though the mountains be carried to the midst of the sea\" (Psalm 46:1-2).\n\nThank You, Lord, that no weapon formed against me will prosper (Isaiah 54:17). Thank You that You will not leave me in the hands of wicked people who would try to destroy me (Psalm 37:32-33). \"Hide me under the shadow of Your wings, from the wicked who oppress me, from my deadly enemies who surround me\" (Psalm 17:8). Protect me from the plans of evil people. Keep me from sudden danger. \"Be merciful to me, O God, be merciful to me! For my soul trusts in You; and in the shadow of Your wings I will make my refuge\" (Psalm 57:1). Thank You that \"I will both lie down in peace, and sleep; for You alone, O LORD, make me dwell in safety\" (Psalm 4:8). Thank You for Your promises of protection. I lay claim to them this day.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nBecause you have made the LORD, who is my refuge,  \neven the Most High, your dwelling place,  \nno evil shall befall you, nor shall any  \nplague come near your dwelling.  \n **P SALM 91:9-10**\n\nNo weapon formed against you shall prosper.  \n **I SAIAH 54:17**\n\nWhen you pass through the waters, I will be with  \nyou; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow  \nyou. When you walk through the fire,  \nyou shall not be burned, nor shall  \nthe flame scorch you.  \n **I SAIAH 43:2**\n\nHe shall cover you with His feathers, and under His  \nwings you shall take refuge; His truth shall be your  \nshield and buckler. You shall not be afraid of the  \nterror by night, nor of the arrow that flies by day, nor  \nof the pestilence that walks in darkness, nor of the  \ndestruction that lays waste at noonday.  \nA thousand may fall at your side, and ten thousand  \nat your right hand; but it shall not come near you.  \n **P SALM 91:4-7**\n\nHe shall give His angels charge over you, to keep you  \nin all your ways.  \n **P SALM 91:11**\n\n##   CHAPTER EIGHTEEN\n\n## [Lord, Give Me Wisdom to  \nMake Right Decisions](contents.html#rechapter18)\n\nAs I was sitting out on the balcony of that same high-rise beachfront condominium I described in the previous chapter, I had a rare perspective of the water below. I could clearly see where there were very shallow places and where the ocean floor suddenly fell off, making the water very deep. I watched as people would swim a ways out and then find themselves in a place so shallow they were forced to stand up. The water at those places was barely knee level. It was fascinating to watch the swimmers walk around on the sandy plateau and then suddenly fall over the edge into deep water.\n\nI realized that if I could have been connected to each of those swimmers by perhaps a waterproof cell phone or walkie-talkie, I could have told them when they were near the edge. But they had no connection with me. They didn't know to call. So I couldn't tell them what I saw from my perspective.\n\nI think that's the way it is with God. He sees all because He is above all. If we were to connect with Him on a regular basis and say, \"Lord, guide me so I won't fall,\" He could lead us away from the edge. But so often we don't make that connection with God. We don't call. We don't seek His guidance. We don't ask Him for wisdom. We don't consider His perspective. And too often we fall in over our heads because of it.\n\nLot, Abraham's nephew in the Bible, ended up being captured by the enemy because he chose to live in land that _he_ thought was good (Genesis 13:10-11), but it was among wicked people (Genesis 13:13). He chose what _he_ thought was best rather than what was _God's_ best. How many times do people walk out from under God's umbrella of protection and away from _His_ best, all because they have chosen what _they_ think is best for their lives? They don't ask for _His_ wisdom and _His_ direction.\n\nHaven't we all done that at one time or another? And just because we have walked with the Lord for some time doesn't make us immune to this problem. We may think we know God's will for a situation today because of what His will was the last time we asked. But what worked last year might not be the same thing He would direct us to do now. We always need to ask God for wisdom and guidance.\n\nThe things of God can only be discerned in the spirit. But the natural man doesn't get this. He can't. \"The natural man does not receive the things of the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him; nor can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned\" (1 Corinthians 2:14). Have you ever observed someone with no wisdom clearly doing the wrong thing or making a foolish decision? The consequences are crystal clear to you, but _they_ don't see it at all. It's always easier to see a lack of wisdom in others than it is to see it in ourselves. That's why we must pray daily for wisdom.\n\nWisdom means having clear understanding and insight. It means knowing how to apply the truth in every situation. It's discerning what is right and wrong. It's having good judgment. It's being able to sense when you are getting too close to the edge. It's making the right choice or decision. And only God knows what that is. \"When He, the Spirit of truth, has come, He will guide you into all truth; for He will not speak on His own authority, but whatever He hears He will speak; and He will tell you things to come\" (John 16:13). We have no idea how many times simple wisdom has saved our lives or kept us out of harm's way or how many times it will do so in the future. That's why we can't live without it and need to ask God for it. We have to pray, \"Lord give me wisdom in all I do. Help me to walk in wisdom every day.\"\n\n### Ten Good Ways to Walk in Wisdom\n\n1. _Be in the Word of God_. \"My son, if you receive my words, and treasure my commands within you, so that you incline your ear to wisdom, and apply your heart to understanding . . . then you will understand the fear of the LORD, and find the knowledge of God\" (Proverbs 2:1-2,5).\n\n2. _Pray for wisdom_. \"If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him\" (James 1:5).\n\n3. _Acknowledge the Lord in everything_. \"In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths\" (Proverbs 3:6).\n\n4. _Walk in reverence of God_. \"The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom\" (Proverbs 9:10).\n\n5. _Listen to wise people_. \"Incline your ear and hear the words of the wise, and apply your heart to my knowledge\" (Proverbs 22:17).\n\n6. _Value wisdom above all_. \"Get wisdom! Get understanding! Do not forget, nor turn away from the words of my mouth. Do not forsake her, and she will preserve you; love her, and she will keep you\" (Proverbs 4:5-6).\n\n7. _Walk in obedience._ He stores up sound wisdom for the upright; He is a shield to those who walk uprightly\" (Proverbs 2:7).\n\n8. _Be humble_. \"When pride comes, then comes shame; but with the humble is wisdom\" (Proverbs 11:2).\n\n9. _Love your neighbor_. \"He who is devoid of wisdom despises his neighbor, but a man of understanding holds his peace\" (Proverbs 11:12).\n\n10. _Seek the wisdom of God, not the wisdom of the world_. \"But of Him you are in Christ Jesus, who became for us wisdom from God\u2014and righteousness and sanctification and redemption\" (1 Corinthians 1:30). \"Has not God made foolish the wisdom of this world? For since, in the wisdom of God, the world through wisdom did not know God, it pleased God through the foolishness of the message preached to save those who believe\" (1 Corinthians 1:20-21).\n\n### Ten Good Reasons to Ask for Wisdom\n\n1. _To enjoy longevity, wealth, and honor_. \"Length of days is in her right hand, in her left hand riches and honor\" (Proverbs 3:16).\n\n2. _To have a good life_. \"Her ways are ways of pleasantness, and all her paths are peace\" (Proverbs 3:17).\n\n3. _To enjoy vitality and happiness_. \"She is a tree of life to those who take hold of her, and happy are all who retain her\" (Proverbs 3:18).\n\n4. _To secure protection_. \"Then you will walk safely in your way, and your foot will not stumble\" (Proverbs 3:23).\n\n5. _To experience refreshing rest_. \"When you lie down, you will not be afraid; yes, you will lie down and your sleep will be sweet\" (Proverbs 3:24).\n\n6. _To gain confidence_. \"For the LORD will be your confidence, and will keep your foot from being caught\" (Proverbs 3:26).\n\n7. _To know security_. \"Do not forsake her, and she will preserve you; love her, and she will keep you . . . when you walk, your steps will not be hindered, and when you run, you will not stumble\" (Proverbs 4:6, 12).\n\n8. _To be promoted_. \"Exalt her, and she will promote you; she will bring you honor, when you embrace her\" (Proverbs 4:8).\n\n9. _To be protected_. \"When wisdom enters your heart, and knowledge is pleasant to your soul, discretion will preserve you; understanding will keep you, to deliver you from the way of evil, from the man who speaks perverse things\" (Proverbs 2:10-12).\n\n10. _To gain understanding_. \"A wise man will hear and increase learning, and a man of understanding will attain wise counsel\" (Proverbs 1:5).\n\n### Seek the Counsel of God\n\nIt's important to always seek out God's counsel before you seek anyone else's. I don't mean that you can't take advice from your unbelieving doctor or lawyer. I'm saying that _before_ you go to them, ask God _who_ you are to go to and then ask Him to give that person wisdom and knowledge to impart to you. Ask God to show you if you are receiving any advice or guidance from a source that is not of the Lord. Ask Him to lead you away from any ungodly counsel and onto the path of the righteous and wise.\n\nJust out of curiosity, I went down to the beach and out in the water to one of those shallow plateaus I had been observing. I walked around on top of it to see exactly how much of the depth of the water could be determined from that close perspective. Because I had the advantage of knowing there was a steep drop-off on one side, I confidently walked toward the edge. Suddenly the whole edge collapsed and I fell in just as I'd seen other swimmers do. With my pride dripping wet, I made my way back to shore. I realized that even when you _think_ you know something, you still can't get too cocky. We will always need to ask God for His wisdom and counsel about _everything_ , because He is the only one who knows the _whole_ truth.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , I pray You would give me Your wisdom and understanding in all things. I know wisdom is better than gold and understanding better than silver (Proverbs 16:16), so make me rich in wisdom and wealthy in understanding. Thank You that You give \"wisdom to the wise and knowledge to those who have understanding\" (Daniel 2:21). Increase my wisdom and knowledge so I can see Your truth in every situation. Give me discernment for each decision I must make.\n\nLord, help me to always seek godly counsel and not look to the world and ungodly people for answers. Thank You, Lord, that You will give me the counsel and instruction I need, even as I sleep. Thank You that \"You will show me the path of life\" (Psalm 16:7-11).\n\nI delight in Your law and in Your Word. Help me to mediate on it day and night, to ponder it, to speak it, to memorize it, to get it into my soul and my heart. Lord, I know that whoever \"trusts in his own heart is a fool, but whoever walks wisely will be delivered\" (Proverbs 28:26). I don't want to trust my own heart. I want to trust Your Word and Your instruction so that I will walk wisely and never do ignorant or stupid things. Make me to be a wise person.\n\nYou said in Your Word that You store up sound wisdom for the upright (Proverbs 2:7). Help me to walk uprightly, righteously, and obediently to Your commands. May I never be wise in my own eyes, but may I always fear You. Keep me far from evil so that I can claim the health and strength Your Word promises (Proverbs 3:7-8). Give me the wisdom, knowledge, understanding, direction, and discernment I need to keep me away from the plans of evil so that I will walk safely and not stumble (Proverbs 2:10-13). Lord, I know that in You \"are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge\" (Colossians 2:3). Help me to discover those treasures.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nThe fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom, and  \nthe knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.  \nFor by me your days will be multiplied, and  \nyears of life will be added to you.  \n **P ROVERBS 9:10-11**\n\nThe mouth of the righteous speaks wisdom,  \nand his tongue talks of justice.  \nThe law of his God is in his heart;  \nnone of his steps shall slide.  \n **P SALM 37:30-31**\n\nThrough wisdom a house is built, and by  \nunderstanding it is established; by knowledge the  \nrooms are filled with all precious and pleasant riches.  \n **P ROVERBS 24:3-4**\n\nCall to Me, and I will answer you, and show  \nyou great and mighty things,  \nwhich you do not know.  \n **J EREMIAH 33:3**\n\nIf you cry out for discernment, and lift up your voice  \nfor understanding, if you seek her as silver,  \nand search for her as for hidden treasures; then you  \nwill understand the fear of the LORD, and find the  \nknowledge of God. For the LORD gives wisdom; from  \nHis mouth come knowledge and understanding.  \n **P ROVERBS 2:3-6**\n\n##   CHAPTER NINETEEN\n\n## [Lord, Deliver Me from  \nEvery Evil Work](contents.html#rechapter19)\n\nI know God as my Deliverer. He has set me free from many things, including alcohol, drugs, fear, depression, anxiety, and unforgiveness, to mention just a few. I have seen the Lord set me free in an instant, and I have also been through a process of deliverance that took years. Sometimes I had to fast and pray to get free, sometimes it took other strong believers praying for me, and sometimes it happened just by being in the Lord's presence. Regardless of _how_ it happened, what matters most is that it _did_.\n\nWe all need deliverance at one time or another. That's because no matter how spiritual we are, we're still made of flesh. And no matter how perfectly we live, we still have an enemy who is trying to erect strongholds of evil in our lives. God wants us free from everything that binds, holds, or separates us from Him.\n\nJesus taught us to pray, \"Deliver us from the evil one\" (Matthew 6:13). He would not have instructed us in that manner if we didn't need to do it. But so often we don't pray that way, acting as if He never said it at all. So often we live our lives as if we don't realize Jesus paid an enormous price so we could be free. Jesus \"gave Himself for our sins, that He might deliver us from this present evil age, according to the will of our God and Father\" (Galatians 1:4). He wants to _continue_ to set us free in the future.\n\n### God Wants You Free\n\nDo you ever have trouble with finances to the point where it seems you will never get ahead? Are you constantly sick with one thing after another or with one reccurring illness that never gets diagnosed or cured? Do you feel that the things you do are never acknowledged as having worth? Are you hopelessly drawn to things that are not good for you, such as alcohol, food, drugs, ungodly relationships, or gambling? Are you drawn toward immorality? Do you find it impossible to rise above your resentment toward someone no matter how hard you try? Do you have continual strife in an important relationship?\n\nDo you always feel distant from God no matter what you do? Does it seem as though your prayers are never being heard or answered? Do you feel discouraged and sad more than you feel the joy of the Lord? Do you find yourself coming back time and again to the same old problem, the same old habits of action and thought, the same old unhealthy situation? Do you always feel bad about yourself? If you said yes to any of these questions, I have good news for you. God wants to set you free. He wants you to remember that He is the Deliverer (Romans 11:26) and He promises to \"deliver those who are drawn toward death\" (Proverbs 24:11).\n\nDo you realize that any one of these inclinations or symptoms could be the enemy's weapon formed against you? So often we go along with the devil's plans for our lives, not knowing we don't have to put up with it. We think it's just fate or bad luck when it's really the enemy. But Jesus came to set us free from all the things that bind us. He came to lift us above the enemy who wants to destroy us. God hears the groaning of those who are held captive (Psalm 102:19-20). If you cry out to Him, He will set you free. And \"if the Son makes you free, you shall be free indeed\" (John 8:36). No matter how strong the thing is you're struggling with, God's power to deliver you is stronger.\n\nGod wants you free not only because He loves you and has compassion upon you, but because He wants you to be able to \"serve Him without fear, in holiness and righteousness before Him,\" all the days of your life (Luke 1:74-75). Of course, we are responsible to _walk away_ from evil. The Bible says, \"The highway of the upright is to depart from evil; he who keeps his way preserves his soul\" (Proverbs 16:17). Sometimes _we_ are responsible for the things that happen in our lives. But sometimes there are plans of the enemy erected against us that we must be delivered from.\n\n### How to Find Freedom\n\nDeliverance is found by praying for it yourself (Psalm 72:12), by having someone else who is a strong believer pray with you for it (Psalm 34:17), by reading the truth of God's Word with great understanding and clarity (John 8:32), or by spending time in the Lord's presence. The most effective and powerful way to spend time in the Lord's presence is in praise and worship. Every time you worship God, something happens in the spirit realm to break the power of evil. That's because He inhabits your praises, and this means you are in His presence. \"Now the Lord is the Spirit; and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty\" (2 Corinthians 3:17).\n\nThe Bible says, \"The angel of the LORD encamps all around those who fear Him, and delivers them\" (Psalm 34:7). Whenever the enemy tries to tell you that you will never get free, drown him out with praise. Thank God that He is the Deliverer and you are being delivered even as you praise Him. And once you have been set free, tell others about it. \"Let the redeemed of the LORD say so, whom He has redeemed from the hand of the enemy\" (Psalm 107:2).\n\nIf you ever seem to be sliding back into the very thing you've already been set free of, don't even waste time getting discouraged. Often what seems like the same old thing coming back again may be a new layer surfacing that needs to come off. You're not going backwards\u2014you are going deeper. Those deep layers of bondage can hurt far worse than the earlier ones. Trust that your times are in His hands, and He will deliver you in His timing (Psalm 31:14-15).\n\nRemember that deliverance comes from the Lord, and it is an ongoing process. It is God who has \"delivered us from so great a death, and does deliver us; in whom we trust that He will still deliver us\" (2 Corinthians 1:10). God does a complete work, and He will see it through to the end. So don't give up because it's taking longer than you hoped. Be confident that \"He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ\" (Philippians 1:6).\n\nHe will not rest until your righteousness goes forth as brightness and your salvation as a lamp that burns (Isaiah 62:1). Deliverance won't change you into someone else. It will release you to be who you really are\u2014an intelligent, secure, loving, talented, kindhearted, witty, attractive, wonderful woman of God.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , thank You that You have promised to \"deliver me from every evil work and preserve me\" for Your heavenly kingdom (2 Timothy 4:18). I know that \"we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places\" (Ephesians 6:12). Thank You that You have put all these enemies under Your feet (Ephesians 1:22), and \"there is nothing covered that will not be revealed, and hidden that will not be known\" (Matthew 10:26).\n\nLord, I know that I can't see all the ways the enemy wants to erect strongholds in my life. I depend on You to reveal them to me. Thank You that You came to \"proclaim liberty to the captives and recovery of sight to the blind, to set at liberty those who are oppressed\" (Luke 4:18). Without You I am held captive by my desires, I am blind to the truth, and I am oppressed. But with You comes freedom from all that. \"My times are in Your hand; deliver me from the hand of my enemies, and from those who persecute me\" (Psalm 31:15).\n\nI know that my deliverance comes from You. Thank You that You \"drew me out of many waters\" and \"delivered me from my strong enemy\" (Psalm 18:16-17). Help me to stand fast in the liberty by which Christ has made me free, and help me not to become tangled in any yoke of bondage (Galatians 5:1).\n\nI call upon You, Lord, and ask that You would deliver me from anything that binds me or separates me from You. I specifically ask to be delivered from (name a specific area where you want to be set free). Where I have opened the door for the enemy with my own desires, I repent of that. Where I am walking in disobedience, show me so I can turn and live in obedience to Your ways. Give me wisdom to walk the right way and strength to rise above the things that would pull me down (Proverbs 28:26).\n\nI know that though I walk in the flesh, I do not war according to the flesh because \"the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds\" (2 Corinthians 10:3-4). In Jesus' name, I pray that every stronghold erected around me by the enemy will be brought down to nothing. Make darkness light before me and the crooked places straight (Isaiah 42:16). I know that You who have begun a good work in me will complete it (Philippians 1:6). Give me patience to not give up and the strength to stand strong in Your Word.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nThe righteous cry out, and the LORD hears, and  \ndelivers them out of all their troubles.  \n **P SALM 34:17**\n\nCall upon Me in the day of trouble; I will deliver  \nyou, and you shall glorify Me.  \n **P SALM 50:15**\n\nI will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven,  \nand whatever you bind on earth will be bound in  \nheaven, and whatever you loose on earth  \nwill be loosed in heaven.  \n **M ATTHEW 16:19**\n\nHe who trusts in his own heart is a fool, but  \nwhoever walks wisely will be delivered.  \n **P ROVERBS 28:26**\n\nBecause he has set his love upon Me, therefore I will  \ndeliver him; I will set him on high, because  \nhe has known My name.  \n **P SALM 91:14**\n\n##   CHAPTER TWENTY\n\n## [Lord, Set Me Free from  \nNegative Emotions](contents.html#rechapter20)\n\nI used to think that living with anxiety, depression, fear, and hopelessness was a way of life. _This is just the way I am_ , I thought. But when I came to know the Lord and started living God's way, I began to see that _all_ things are possible to anyone who believes and obeys God. It's even possible to live without negative emotions. God will take them off of us like a thick wet blanket if we ask Him to. But we have to pray.\n\nHave you ever felt as though God has forsaken you? Well, if you have, you're not alone. In fact, you are in very good company. Not only do millions of other people feel that way right now, but Jesus felt that way at one time too. At the lowest point in His life, Jesus said, \"My God, my God, why have You forsaken Me?\" (Matthew 27:46). We all have difficult times. Times when we feel all alone and abandoned. But the truth is we aren't. God is with us to help us when we call upon Him. In the midst of these times, we don't have to be controlled by our negative emotions. We can resist them by praying and knowing the truth of what God's Word says about them.\n\n### Seven Good Ways to Get Free of Negative Emotions\n\n1. _Refuse to be anxious._ No matter what problems we have in our life, Jesus has overcome them. \"In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world\" (John 16:33). We can find freedom from anxiety just by spending time with Him. \"In the multitude of my anxieties within me, Your comforts delight my soul\" (Psalm 94:19).\n\nWhen you are anxious, it means you aren't trusting God to take care of you. But He will prove His faithfulness if you run to Him. \"Do not seek what you should eat or what you should drink, nor have an anxious mind. For all these things the nations of the world seek after, and your Father knows that you need these things. But seek the kingdom of God, and all these things shall be added to you\" (Luke 12:29-31). God says we don't need to be anxious about _anything;_ we just need to pray about _everything_.\n\n2. _Refuse to be ruled by anger._ When we frequently give place to anger it shuts off all God has for us the way pressure on a hose shuts off the water flow. I've seen it happen countless times with people. Just when God is moving in their lives in a powerful way, they give in to anger and completely shut Him off. When we give anger a home in our souls, we open the door to sin and the devil. \" 'Be angry, and do not sin': do not let the sun go down on your wrath, nor give place to the devil\" (Ephesians 4:26-27).\n\nAn angry person upsets everyone around them, and they make serious mistakes as a result. \"An angry man stirs up strife, and a furious man abounds in transgression\" (Proverbs 29:22). How many angry men abuse their wives, or even kill them, and destroy their lives forever because of it? How many angry women destroy their relationships and their families and sacrifice the destiny God has for them? Only foolish people are quick to get angry. People with wisdom don't want to pay the price. \"Do not hasten in your spirit to be angry, for anger rests in the bosom of fools\" (Ecclesiastes 7:9). Ask God to keep you free from anger so you can remain in the flow of all God has for you.\n\n3. _Refuse to be dissatisfied._ It's easy to focus on the negative and look for everything that's wrong with your life. But when we have constant unrest because we are never at peace, it not only makes _us_ miserable\u2014it makes everyone around us miserable too. There is nothing wrong with wanting things to be different when they need to be, but when that attitude becomes a way of life, we sacrifice our peace. Whenever you feel discouraged by your circumstances, remember that the apostle Paul said \"I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content: I know how to be abased, and I know how to abound. Everywhere and in all things I have learned both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me\" (Philippians 4:11-13).\n\nGod promises you rest. \"There remains therefore a rest for the people of God\" (Hebrews 4:9). It's possible to find contentment, rest, peace, and joy in any situation. Tell God you are making that your goal and you need Him to help you.\n\n4. _Refuse to be envious._ When you set your eyes on someone else and what _they_ have instead of on the Lord and what _He_ has, a covetous spirit is about to make your life miserable. \"For where envy and self-seeking exist, confusion and every evil thing are there. But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrisy\" (James 3:16-17). Don't allow yourself to entertain thoughts such as, \"If only I had _her_ hair . . . _her_ face. . . _her_ body. . . _her_ clothes. . . _her_ talent. . . _her_ gifts. . . _her_ husband. . . _her_ kids. . . _her_ wealth. . . _her_ luck. . . _her_ blessings.\" Turn your thoughts toward Jesus instead. Think about _His_ beauty, _His_ wealth, _His_ talents, _His_ nature, _His_ provision, _His_ help, and _His_ power. Thank Him for the rich inheritance you have in Him, and tell Him you can't wait to experience it all.\n\nCovetousness started when Cain wanted what Abel had, and he killed him for it. But he suffered the rest of his life as a result. \"Where there are envy, strife, and divisions among you, are you not carnal and behaving like mere men?\" (1 Corinthians 3:3). We don't want to suffer for the rest of our lives because of covetousness. The price we pay for envy is way too high. \"A sound heart is life to the body, but envy is rottenness to the bones\" (Proverbs 14:30). Ask for God's love to be manifested in you and through you at all times. \"Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy\" (1 Corinthians 13:4).\n\n5. _Refuse to be depressed._ Of all the negative emotions, I believe depression is the one we most readily accept as part of our lives. So many of us live with depression and accept it without even realizing it. It feels natural to us because it is so familiar. But God doesn't want us to accept this as a way of life.\n\nMany people of the Bible understood what depression feels like. \"I am weary with my groaning; all night I make my bed swim; I drench my couch with my tears. My eye wastes away because of grief; it grows old because of all my enemies\" (Psalm 6:6-7). \"Reproach has broken my heart, and I am full of heaviness; I looked for someone to take pity, but there was none; and for comforters, but I found none\" (Psalm 69:20). \"My soul melts from heaviness; strengthen me according to Your word\" (Psalm 119:28). Does any of this sound familiar? The good news is that God doesn't want us to live with these feelings. He wants us to have the joy of the Lord rise in us and chase away spirits of heaviness. \"Depart from me, all you workers of iniquity; for the LORD has heard the voice of my weeping. The LORD has heard my supplication; the LORD will receive my prayer\" (Psalm 6:8-9). God wants us to cry out to Him so He can lift us out of depression.\n\n6. _Refuse to be bitter._ Bitterness burns away your body and soul the way acid eats skin. When a root of bitterness takes hold of your life, it consumes you and cuts off the blessings of God. \"For I see that you are poisoned by bitterness and bound by iniquity\" (Acts 8:23). When we constantly have thoughts such as, \"How long shall I take counsel in my soul, having sorrow in my heart daily? How long will my enemy be exalted over me?\" (Psalm 13:2), then we have bitterness growing in us like a cancer. But we can identify those thoughts and refuse to give place to them. We can ask God to help us resist them. \"Looking diligently lest anyone fall short of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up cause trouble, and by this many become defiled\" (Hebrews 12:15).\n\nPray for God to set you free from any bitterness. Ask Him to give you a spirit of thankfulness, praise, and worship. Ask the Holy Spirit to crowd out anything in your heart that is not of Him.\n\n7. _Refuse to be hopeless._ Hopelessness is a slow killer that will eventually affect the health of your body and soul. But when you deliberately choose to put your hope in the Lord, He will meet all your needs and take all hopelessness away. Just as we can choose what attitude we will have every day, we can choose to put our hope in God. We can guard our soul. \"Thorns and snares are in the way of the perverse; He who guards his soul will be far from them\" (Proverbs 22:5). Hopelessness is death to our souls. Refuse to live with it. No matter how bad things appear to get in your life, you _always_ have hope in the Lord. Ask God to give you hope for your future and an attitude of gratefulness every day of your life.\n\nNegative emotions reveal doubt. If we thoroughly trust God, what do we have to be anxious about? Why would we be angry, dissatisfied, envious, depressed, bitter, or hopeless? Yet we all are susceptible to experiencing these kinds of emotions at some time in our life. So don't feel bad about having them, but don't live with them either. Refuse to allow the ugliness of negative emotions to mar the beauty of the life God has for you.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , help me to live in Your joy and peace. Give me strength and understanding to resist anxiety, anger, unrest, envy, depression, bitterness, hopelessness, loneliness, fear, and guilt. Rescue me when \"my spirit is overwhelmed within me; my heart within me is distressed\" (Psalm 143:4). I refuse to let my life be brought down by negative emotions such as these. I know You have a better quality of life for me than that. When I am tempted to give in to them, show me Your truth.\n\nYou have said in Your Word that by our patience we can possess our souls (Luke 21:19). Give me patience so that I can do that. Help me to keep my \"heart with all diligence,\" for I know that \"out of it spring the issues of life\" (Proverbs 4:23). Help me to not be insecure and self-focused so that I miss opportunities to focus on You and extend Your love. May I be sensitive to the needs, trials, and weaknesses of others and not oversensitive to myself. What You accomplished on the cross is my source of greatest joy. Help me to concentrate on that.\n\n\"The enemy has persecuted my soul; he has crushed my life to the ground; he has made me dwell in darkness, like those who have long been dead. Therefore my spirit is overwhelmed within me; my heart within me is distressed. I remember the days of old; I meditate on all Your works; I muse on the work of Your hands. I spread out my hands to You; my soul longs for You like a thirsty land. Answer me speedily, O LORD; my spirit fails! Do not hide Your face from me, lest I be like those who go down into the pit. Cause me to hear Your lovingkindness in the morning, for in You do I trust; cause me to know the way in which I should walk, for I lift up my soul to You\" (Psalm 143:3-8). Thank You, Lord, that in my distress I can call on You. And when I cry out to You, Lord, You hear my voice and answer (Psalm 18:6). May the joy of knowing You fill my heart with happiness and peace.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nBe anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer  \nand supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests  \nbe made known to God; and the peace of God,  \nwhich surpasses all understanding, will guard your  \nhearts and minds through Christ Jesus.  \n **P HILIPPIANS 4:6-7**\n\nThen they cried out to the LORD in their trouble,  \nand He saved them out of their distresses. He  \nbrought them out of darkness and the shadow of  \ndeath, and broke their chains in pieces.  \n **P SALM 107:13-14**\n\nCome to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden,  \nand I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and  \nlearn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart,  \nand you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is  \neasy and My burden is light.  \n **M ATTHEW 11:28-30**\n\nThe righteous cry out, and the LORD hears, and  \ndelivers them out of all their troubles. The LORD is  \nnear to those who have a broken heart,  \nand saves such as have a contrite spirit.  \n **P SALM 34:17-18**\n\nThose who wait on the LORD shall renew their  \nstrength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles,  \nthey shall run and not be weary, they  \nshall walk and not faint.  \n **I SAIAH 40:31**\n\n##   CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE\n\n## [Lord, Comfort Me in Times  \nof Trouble](contents.html#rechapter21)\n\nEvery time I take off in an airplane on a gray, dreary, rainy day, I'm always amazed at how we can fly right up through the dark wet clouds, so thick that we can't see one thing out the window, and then suddenly rise above it all and have the ability to see for miles. Up there the sky is sunny, clear, and blue. I keep forgetting that no matter how bad the weather gets, it's possible to rise above the storm to a place where everything is fine.\n\nOur spiritual and emotional lives are much the same. When the dark clouds of trial, struggle, grief, or suffering roll in and settle on us so thick that we can barely see ahead of us, it's easy to forget there is a place of calm, light, clarity, and peace we can rise to. If we take God's hand in those difficult times, He will lift us up above our circumstances to the place of comfort, warmth, and safety He has for us.\n\nOne of my favorite names for the Holy Spirit is the Comforter (John 14:26 ASV). Just as we don't have to beg the sun for light, we don't have to beg the Holy Spirit for comfort either. He _is_ comfort. We simply have to separate ourselves from anything that separates us from Him. We have to pray that when we go through difficult times, He will give us a greater sense of His comfort in it.\n\nTough times happen to everyone at one time or another. Pain and loss are a part of life. There are many different reasons why these things occur, but God is always there to bring good out of it when we invite Him to. If we understand the different possibilities for our suffering, it will help us overcome our pain and see our faith grow in the midst of it.\n\n### Four Good Reasons for Difficult Times\n\n1. _Sometimes difficult things happen to us so that the glory and power of God can be revealed in and through us._ When Jesus passed by a man who was born blind, His disciples asked Him if the man's blindness was because he had sinned or because his parents had sinned. Jesus replied, \"Neither this man nor his parents sinned, but that the works of God should be revealed in him\" (John 9:3). We may not be able to understand why certain things are happening at the time, and we may never know why we have to go through them until we go to be with the Lord, but when we turn to God in the midst of difficult situations, God's glory will be seen in them and on you.\n\n2. _God uses difficult times to purify us._ The Bible says, \"Since Christ suffered for us in the flesh, arm yourselves also with the same mind, for he who has suffered in the flesh has ceased from sin\" (1 Peter 4:1). This means our suffering during difficult times will burn sin and selfishness out of our lives. God allows suffering to happen so that we will learn to live for Him and not for ourselves. So that we will pursue His will and not our own. It's not pleasant at the time, but God's desire is \"that we may be partakers of His holiness\" (Hebrews 12:10). He wants us to let go of the things we lust after and cling to what is most important in life\u2014Him.\n\n3. _Sometimes our misery is caused by God disciplining us_. \"No chastening seems to be joyful for the present, but painful; nevertheless, afterward it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it\" (Hebrews 12:11). The fruit that this godly disciplining and pruning produces in us is worth the trouble we have to go through to get it, and we have to be careful not to resist it or hate it. \"Do not despise the chastening of the LORD, nor be discouraged when you are rebuked by Him; for whom the LORD loves He chastens, and scourges every son whom He receives\" (Hebrews 12:5-6).\n\n4. _Sometimes we are caught in the midst of the enemy's work._ It's the enemy's delight to make you miserable and try to destroy your life. Often the reason for the anguish, sorrow, sadness, grief, or pain you feel is entirely his doing and no fault of your own or anyone else's. Your comfort is in knowing that as you praise God in the midst of it, He will defeat the enemy and bring good out of it that you can't even fathom. He wants you to walk with Him in faith as He leads you through it, and He will teach you to trust Him in the midst of it.\n\nNone of us wants to hear about how good pain and suffering are for us. When we're in the midst of trouble, tragedy, loss, devastation, or disappointment, we hurt terribly and find it impossible to think beyond the pain. But the Holy Spirit is there to help us. In other translations of the Bible, He is called the Helper. Jesus said, \"I will pray the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may abide with you forever\u2014the Spirit of truth\" (John 14:16-17). When we turn to the Holy Spirit for help and comfort, He will not only give us aid, but He will give us a richer portion of His presence than we have ever had before. We will be blessed when we mourn, because it will be the Comforter who comforts us (Matthew 5:4).\n\nWhen my friend died of breast cancer a number of years ago, I was devastated with grief. We had been best friends since high school, and I didn't know how I could survive the loss. The day after the funeral was the worst pain of all. Reality set in and I couldn't stop crying. Plus, along with my six-and ten-year-old children, I now had her eight-year-old son to care for too. I asked God to lift me out of my grief so I could function well enough to help him cope with his loss. God answered that prayer every day as I turned to Him for strength and comfort.\n\nEvery time you rise above the pain in your life and find the goodness, clarity, peace, and light of the Lord there, your faith will increase. God will meet you in the midst of your pain and not only perfect you, but increase your compassion for the sufferings of others. As you continue to live in the presence of the Lord, His glory will be revealed in you.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , help me to remember that no matter how dark my situation may become, You are the light of my life and can never be put out. No matter what dark clouds settle on my life, You will lift me above the storm and into the comfort of Your presence. Only You can take whatever loss I experience and fill that empty place with good. Only You can take the burden of my grief and pain and dry my tears. \"Hear me when I call, O God of my righteousness! You have relieved me in my distress; have mercy on me, and hear my prayer\" (Psalm 4:1).\n\nIn times of grief, suffering, or trial, I pray for an added sense of Your presence. I want to grow stronger in these times and not weaker. I want to increase in faith and not be overcome with doubt. I want to have hope in the midst of it and not surrender to hopelessness. I want to stand strong in Your truth and not be swept away by my emotions.\n\nThank You that I do not have to be afraid of bad news because my heart is steadfast, trusting in You (Psalm 112:7). Thank You that \"You have delivered my soul from death, my eyes from tears, and my feet from falling\" (Psalm 116:8). Thank You that I walk before You with hope in my heart and life in my body. Thank You that \"I shall not die, but live, and declare the works of the LORD\" (Psalm 118:17). Even when \"my soul melts from heaviness,\" I pray that You would \"strengthen me according to Your word\" (Psalm 119:28).\n\nHelp me to remember to give thanks to You in all things, knowing that You reign in the midst of them. Remind me that You have redeemed me and I am Yours and nothing is more important than that. I know when I pass through the waters You will be with me and the river will not overflow me. When I walk through the fire I will not be burned, nor will the flame touch me (Isaiah 43:1-2). That's because You are a good God and have sent Your Holy Spirit to comfort and help me. I pray that You, O God of hope, will fill me with all joy and peace and faith so that I will \"abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit\" (Romans 15:13). Thank You that You have sent Your Holy Spirit to be my Comforter and Helper. Remind me of that in the midst of difficult times.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nBeloved, do not think it strange concerning the fiery  \ntrial which is to try you, as though some strange  \nthing happened to you; but rejoice to the extent  \nthat you partake of Christ's sufferings, that when His glory  \nis revealed, you may also be glad with exceeding joy.  \n **1 P ETER 4:12-13**\n\nMay the God of all grace, who called us to His  \neternal glory by Christ Jesus, after you have suffered  \na while, perfect, establish, strengthen, and settle you.  \n **1 P ETER 5:10**\n\nWait on the LORD; be of good courage, and He shall  \nstrengthen your heart; wait, I say, on the LORD!  \n **P SALM 27:14**\n\nBlessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs  \nis the kingdom of heaven.  \nBlessed are those who mourn,  \nfor they shall be comforted.  \n **M ATTHEW 5:3-4**\n\nThe LORD shall preserve your going out and  \nyour coming in from this time forth,  \nand even forevermore.  \n **P SALM 121:8**\n\n##   CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO\n\n## [Lord, Enable Me to Resist  \nthe Temptation to Sin](contents.html#rechapter22)\n\nWhy would a young man with everything going for him want to risk losing it all? One particular man I know of had good looks, musical talent, courage, wealth, prominence, authority, a wife, and God's favor. In addition to all this, he had single-handedly defeated one of the worst enemy threats to his nation's military. Yet he fell into temptation and succumbed to it with sin on top of sin.\n\nKing David obviously had too much time on his hands _and_ he wasn't where he was supposed to be. He was out on the roof of his palace watching the woman next door take a bath instead of going to war with his men the way other kings did. His biggest mistake was not that he fell into temptation, for that can happen to anyone, but that he didn't turn away from it and run to God in repentance immediately. He stayed and stared. He thought and schemed. He let his lust rule him instead of his God. As a result, he became a murderer and an adulterer and ended up paying for it for the rest of his life\u2014even to the point of witnessing the death of his own son.\n\nTemptation happened to Jesus, too. But He did the right thing and David did not. David went with the lust of his flesh and Jesus didn't. Jesus stood strong in the Word of God and David forgot about it.\n\nI have lived long enough, and I'm sure you have too, to have seen far too many people\u2014men and women both\u2014sacrifice their lives by giving in to temptation. There are many kinds of temptation, just as there are many kinds of sin. The one that seems to trip people up most often is sexual temptation. I have seen talented people succumb to sexual temptation and forfeit the promising life God had for them. They fell like meteors and burned themselves out when they could have been a shining star today. Even though they have been redeemed and restored, I have never seen them regain the anointing and glory of God that was once upon them.\n\nWhen people fall into adultery, the life they _would_ have had is forever sacrificed. Of course, when they repent they can receive forgiveness and be restored, but they have lost what _would_ have been had this sin never happened. David was forgiven and restored, but he lost the thing he loved most\u2014his son\u2014and his reign was marred from that point on with one disaster after another, including the destruction of many of his beloved family members. God still loved him, but his sin still had consequences. People don't realize how much they lose when they give in to sexual temptation. Their light never shines as brightly as it would have if they had not given in to the lust of their flesh.\n\nFrom the volumes of mail I receive I know that improper attraction to a person of the opposite sex is the biggest temptation for many men and women. Often it is not acted upon, but it is still entertained in the mind. And sins of the mind have serious consequences too. Sexual sin begins with thoughts such as, \"This is the person of my dreams, never mind that he (she) is married and I am married.\" \"This must be right or I wouldn't feel so good doing it.\" \"I deserve to have what I want.\" \"No one will ever know.\" \"This must be fate.\"\n\nDon't let the devil rob you of all God has for you by tempting you with impure thoughts. It's okay to appreciate a man's talents, godliness, brilliance, or appearance, but unless you are married to him, remember that he is your brother in the Lord. If you ever find yourself with any kind of unholy attraction, confess it immediately before God and ask Him to set you free from it. Then tell Satan that you recognize his plan to destroy you and separate you from all God has for you, and you are not going to allow him to do it. Fast and pray if you have to in order to break down that stronghold. Don't let up until it's gone. \"Watch and pray, lest you enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak\" (Matthew 26:41). The more you have been given, the more you will be approached by the enemy who will try to take it away from you. Be ready for him with a full knowledge of the Word of God.\n\n### Six Good Things to Remember About Temptation\n\n1. _Who:_ Temptation can happen to anyone. No matter how spiritual and solid you think you are, you can fall into temptation. The people I have seen who fell the hardest were those who were prideful about what good Christians they were. They bragged about their spiritual strength and godliness, and yet they fell the hardest and without repentance. We can't let spiritual pride be our downfall.\n\n2. _What:_ You can be tempted by anything. The most common temptation today is sexual because the opportunity for it is everywhere. But there are other kinds of lust as well. Money tempts us. Power tempts us. Desire tempts us. \"Each one is tempted when he is drawn away by his own desires and enticed. Then, when desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, brings forth death. Do not be deceived, my beloved brethren\" (James 1:14-16). The enemy will tempt you in the way you are most susceptible. Whatever your flesh lusts after, ask God to give you the strength to resist it. Guard your vulnerable areas with prayer.\n\n3. _When:_ Temptation can happen any time and often when you least expect it and are most susceptible. When it does happen, the danger is in thinking you can handle it alone. It's best to take it to God and confess it immediately, and then find someone trustworthy to pray with you about it. Don't think it will just pass. The risk is too great. Treat it as a serious threat no matter when it happens.\n\n4. _Where:_ Temptation can happen anywhere. In church, at work, at home, on a bus or plane. It will happen in the place you least expect it. Wherever it is, separate yourself from it immediately. If chocolate tempts you, don't hang out in the candy store. The smell of it will drive you crazy and weaken your resistance. If a certain man tempts you, don't be around him. Or if you must, don't be alone with him. Separate yourself from the temptation and ask God to kill that lust in you.\n\n5. _Why:_ The reason the enemy tempts you is because he knows of the great things God wants to do in your life, and he thinks you are dumb enough to give it all up for a few moments of pleasure. He knows that not only do _you_ stand to lose from it, but other people will be hurt by your sin as well. So he has the potential for multiple victories. When you see his trap, tell him you are not going to allow him to destroy your life or anyone else's.\n\n6. _How:_ You have to remember that no matter how you are being tempted, it is a set-up by the enemy intended to bring you down. He will find your weakness, need, or insecurity and tempt you with whatever you are most easily tempted. This is the best reason to get rid of all insecurities and become whole people. It eliminates one of the ways the enemy has access to our lives.\n\nThe best time to pray about temptation is _before_ you fall into it. After the lure presents itself, resisting temptation becomes much more difficult. The model prayer Jesus taught us to pray as a matter of course is a good place to start. \"Do not lead us into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one\" (Matthew 6:13). We can also do as Jesus did and rebuke the enemy with God's Word. We can \"stand fast therefore in the liberty by which Christ has made us free, and do not be entangled again with a yoke of bondage\" (Galatians 5:1). We can call on the name of the Lord \"for in that He Himself has suffered, being tempted, He is able to aid those who are tempted\" (Hebrews 2:18).\n\nDon't ever think you are immune to temptation. The older you get, the more you are a target. Many people fail when they get older because they think they can get away with it. You don't want to be the kind of person who believes for a while and in time of temptation falls away (Luke 8:13). Jesus instructed His disciples to \"rise and pray, lest you enter into temptation.\" You must do the same.\n\nJesus' temptation happened just before the greatest breakthrough in His life and ministry. It will happen before the greatest breakthrough in yours too. Be ready for it. And remember that no matter how great the temptation is you face, \"He who is in you is greater than he who is in the world\" (1 John 4:4). You have the power to overcome it.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , help me to be strong in my mind and spirit so I don't fall into any traps of the enemy. Do not allow me to be led into temptation, but deliver me from the evil one and his plans for my downfall. The area I am most concerned about is (name any area where you might be tempted). In the name of Jesus, I break any hold temptation has on me. Keep me strong and able to resist anything that would tempt me away from all You have for me.\n\nI pray I will have no secret thoughts where I entertain ungodly desires to do or say something I shouldn't. I pray that I will have no secret life where I do things I would be ashamed to have others see. I don't want to have fellowship with unfruitful works of darkness. Help me, instead, to expose them (Ephesians 5:11). Make straight paths for my feet (Hebrews 12:13). Don't allow the enemy to sneak up on my blind side and take me by surprise.\n\nI know You are \"not the author of confusion but of peace\" (1 Corinthians 14:33). Help me not to fall into any confusion about this. Help me to hide Your Word in my heart so I will see clearly and not sin against You in any way (Psalm 119:11). By the power of Your Spirit in me, I will not allow sin to reign in me or draw me to obey its lusts (Romans 6:12).\n\nThank You, Lord, that You are near to all who call upon You, and You will fulfill the desire of those who fear You. Thank You that You hear my cries and will save me from any weakness that could lead me away from all You have for me (Psalm 145:18-19). Thank You that You know \"how to deliver the godly out of temptations\" (2 Peter 2:9). Thank You that You will deliver me out of all temptation and keep it far from me.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nBlessed is the man who endures temptation;  \nfor when he has been approved, he will receive  \nthe crown of life which the Lord has  \npromised to those who love Him.  \n **J AMES 1:12**\n\nNo temptation has overtaken you except such as is  \ncommon to man; but God is faithful, who will not  \nallow you to be tempted beyond what you are able,  \nbut with the temptation will also make the way  \nof escape, that you may be able to bear it.  \n **1 C ORINTHIANS 10:13**\n\nLet us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so  \neasily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the  \nrace that is set before us, looking unto Jesus, the  \nauthor and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that  \nwas set before Him endured the cross, despising the  \nshame, and has sat down at the right hand  \nof the throne of God.  \n **H EBREWS 12:1-2**\n\nMy brethren, count it all joy when you fall into  \nvarious trials, knowing that the testing of your  \nfaith produces patience. But let patience have its  \nperfect work, that you may be perfect and  \ncomplete, lacking nothing.  \n **J AMES 1:2-4**\n\nTherefore let him who thinks he stands  \ntake heed lest he fall.  \n **1 C ORINTHIANS 10:12**\n\n##   CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE\n\n## [Lord, Heal Me and Help  \nMe Care for My Body](contents.html#rechapter23)\n\nI almost died two years ago. I had been extremely sick in my abdominal area for months, and I was in and out of different emergency rooms and hospitals, seeing different doctors and specialists, but none of these people could find anything wrong with me. All the tests came back proving I was as healthy as I could possibly be. No one could figure out why I was so miserable.\n\nIn the middle of the most awful night I have ever experienced in my life, I felt something explode in my body so violently that I knew I would die if I didn't get help. My husband rushed me to the hospital at 3:30 in the morning because I didn't have time to wait for an ambulance. But then I laid in the emergency room for hours begging someone to help me and telling people I was going to die if somebody didn't do something soon. I was given all the same tests they had given me many times before, and still no one could find anything wrong with me.\n\nMy husband prayed for me continually, and when my sister, Susan, and my close friend, Roz, arrived at the hospital, they prayed for me too. They called other people to pray that someone would figure out what was wrong and do something. I couldn't pray anything for myself except, \"Help me, Jesus.\"\n\nAt one point I said to God, \"Is this my time to die?\" But I did not sense God saying that it was. In fact, I felt Him say there were things He still had for me to do.\n\nIt wasn't until eight hours after I was brought in to the hospital that a specialist called a surgeon in who was brave enough to say, \"I can't tell what's wrong with you by any of the tests, but I believe your appendix has ruptured. I am going to take you into surgery immediately, and if I'm wrong I'll find out what the problem is.\"\n\nAs it turned out, he was right. After the surgery the doctor said, \"In another hour you would have gone into a toxic-shock coma, and I could not have saved your life.\" I knew God had answered our prayers for healing and this surgeon was an important part of that answer.\n\nFor the next two weeks, I was hooked up to tubes and a machine and endured pain that made childbirth seem pleasant. Even constant morphine couldn't take it all away. When the doctor came to check on me one morning, I asked him why this had happened.\n\n\"Did I do something wrong?\" I asked. \"Did I take too many vitamins? Did I take too few? Did I take the wrong ones? Did I not exercise enough? Or too much? I have always tried to take good care of myself. Could I have done something differently to avoid this?\"\n\n\"You couldn't have done anything to prevent this,\" he replied. \"It's probably genetic and runs in your family.\"\n\nHe was right again. There were many people in my family who had experienced this same problem, only at a much younger age than I. In fact, I thought nothing like this would happen to me because I had passed the age when it occurred in other family members. I realized that no matter how hard we try to do the right thing, we can't always prevent bad things from happening in our body. We should do the best we can to take care of ourselves, but we will still always need God to be our Healer.\n\n### Two Separate Issues\n\nHealing and body care are two different things. When you ask God to heal you, this is something _He_ does. Taking care of your body is something _you_ do. Both are vitally important.\n\nGod knows we are a fallen race and can't do everything perfectly. That's why He sent Jesus to be our Healer. But He also calls us to be good stewards over everything He gives us, including our body. He wants us to live in balance and temperance and to take care not to abuse our body in any way. He wants us to glorify Him in the care of our bodies because we are the temple of His Holy Spirit.\n\nMany of us tend to think, \"Everything I have is the Lord's, except for my eating and exercise habits. Those are mine.\" Or we think, \"My life is the Lord's, but my body belongs to me, and I can do with it whatever feels good.\" But when we are the Lord's, our body has to be surrendered to Him just like everything else. Caring for our body is not something we can do successfully independent of God.\n\nThe motivation for what we do in the area of body care is very important. It will effect how successful we are. If we eat right and exercise merely to look great in our clothes, it won't be enough to sustain us as we get older. But if we eat right and engage in proper exercise for the purpose of being a more vital, healthy, energetic, and useful servant of the Lord, this has eternal consequences and you are more likely to stick with it.\n\nI've actually heard people say, \"I don't worry about taking care of my body because the Lord can just heal me when I get sick.\" This kind of presumptuous thinking is dangerous and can get us into trouble. Satan's plan for our lives is to do the very thing that will hurt us the most. We help him along by that kind of attitude. We sabotage our lives by not doing what's best for bodies and our health. Ask God to help you resist what is bad for you and to be disciplined enough to do what's right. God loves and values you. He created you. You are where His Holy Spirit dwells. He wants you to love and value yourself enough to take good care of your body.\n\n### In Touch with the Healer\n\nIn spite of all our best efforts, however, we can still get sick. We can do everything we know to do and still become seriously ill. That's because through no fault of our own we inherit predispositions or weaknesses from our ancestors. We can be exposed to things we aren't even aware of at the time that cause horrific diseases. We can have accidents. God knew all this, and so He sent Jesus as our Healer. His healing touch is God's mercy to us.\n\nIn the Bible, people who simply _touched_ Jesus were healed. \"Wherever He entered, into villages, cities, or in the country, they laid the sick in the marketplaces, and begged Him that they might just touch the hem of His garment. And as many as touched Him were made well\" (Mark 6:56). We, too, must touch Him to find healing. The way we touch Him is to spend time in His presence. Ask God to heal you, and then trust Him to do it _His_ way and in _His_ time. Partner with God in the care of your body, knowing that, although you are the caregiver, He is the Healer.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , I thank You that You are the Healer. I look to You for my healing whenever I am injured or sick. I pray that You would strengthen and heal me today. Specifically I pray for (name any area where you need the Lord to heal you). Heal me \"that it might be fulfilled which was spoken by Isaiah the prophet, saying: 'He Himself took our infirmities and bore our sicknesses' \" (Matthew 8:17). You suffered, died, and were buried for me so that I might have healing, forgiveness, and eternal life. By Your stripes I am healed (1 Peter 2:24). I know that in Your presence is where I will find healing. In Your presence I can reach out and touch You and in turn be touched by You.\n\nOnly You know what is best for me and what is not, so I ask that You would reveal that to me. Take away all confusing and conflicting information, and instruct me in what to eat and what to avoid. I can't do this without You, Lord, for only You know the way You created me. Give me a solid ability to be disciplined about what I eat and drink and how I exercise. Enable me to discipline my body and bring it into subjection (1 Corinthians 9:27).\n\nLord, You have said in Your Word, \"My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge\" (Hosea 4:6). I don't want to be destroyed because I lacked knowledge of the right thing to do. Teach me and help me learn. Lead me to people who can help or advise me. Enable me to follow their suggestions and directions. When I am sick and need to see a doctor, show me which doctor to see and give that doctor wisdom as to how to treat me.\n\nThe area I struggle with most in caring for my body is (name the area that presents the greatest challenge to you). Be Lord over this part of my life so that I can bring it into alignment with Your will. Help me to find freedom and deliverance in this area where it is needed.\n\nLord, I want everything I do to be glorifying to You. Help me to be a good steward of the body You have given me. I confess the times I have sat in judgment upon it, criticizing it in my mind for not being perfect. I repent of that and ask Your forgiveness. I know that my body is the temple of Your Holy Spirit, who dwells in me. Help me to fully understand this truth so that I will keep my temple clean and healthy. Help me not to mistreat my body in any way. Teach me how to properly care for my health.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nIs anyone among you sick? Let him call for the  \nelders of the church, and let them pray over him,  \nanointing him with oil in the name of the Lord.  \nAnd the prayer of the faith will save the sick,  \nand the Lord will raise him up. And if he has  \ncommitted sins, he will be forgiven. Confess your  \ntrespasses to one another, and pray for one another,  \nthat you may be healed. The effective, fervent  \nprayer of a righteous man avails much.  \n **J AMES 5:14-16**\n\nHeal me, O LORD, and I shall be healed;  \nsave me, and I shall be saved,  \nfor You are my praise.  \n **J EREMIAH 17:14**\n\n\"I will restore health to you and heal you of your  \nwounds,\" says the LORD.  \n **J EREMIAH 30:17**\n\nTherefore, whether you eat or drink,  \nor whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.  \n **1 C ORINTHIANS 10:31**\n\nFor we know that if our earthly house, this tent, is  \ndestroyed, we have a building from God, a house not  \nmade with hands, eternal in the heavens.  \n **2 C ORINTHIANS 5:1**\n\n##   CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR\n\n## [Lord, Free Me from  \nUngodly Fear](contents.html#rechapter24)\n\nFor years I couldn't take a shower without being afraid. That's because all the frightening images from the film _Psycho_ kept coming back to terrify me. I had seen that film when I was young, and my shower experiences were ruined from that point on. It wasn't until I received the Lord and someone prayed for me to be delivered from fear that I was actually able to close my eyes in the shower and enjoy the water.\n\nThere were many other things I was afraid of too, such as dying, starving, failing, flying, accidents, needles, knives, getting lost, being abandoned, getting sick, being injured, the dark, the unknown, people's opinions, and being rejected. But God healed me from every one of these fears. Some I prayed about specifically. Some just went away as I learned to walk with the Lord and spend time in His love and His presence.\n\nGod does not want us to live in fear. Fear does not come from Him. It's the world that teaches us to fear. The things we see in movies, videos, newspapers, and books make us afraid. The things we hear people say and see them do causes us to have fear. The enemy can make us afraid of everything, including our future. It wears us down worrying that something we fear is going to happen. But we don't have to be tormented by fear.\n\n### Ungodly Fear\n\nThere are two kinds of fear: godly and ungodly. We must pray that we live in godly fear, which is good, and not give place to ungodly fear, which is torment. One of the most common types of ungodly fear is the fear of man, or a fear of rejection. It's a trap we can fall into without ever realizing it. In order to protect ourselves from it, we have to care more about what _God_ says than what anyone else says. We must look to Him for approval and acceptance and not to people. If God does not have first place in our hearts, we are constantly fearing man. \"The fear of man brings a snare, but whoever trusts in the LORD shall be safe\" (Proverbs 29:25).\n\nThere are so many things to be afraid of in this world. Sometimes all it takes is one news report to fill us with fear. Our imaginations alone can frighten us. But God wants to set us free from all fear for all time.\n\n### Four Good Ways to Get Rid of Ungodly Fear\n\n1. G _et rid of ungodly fear by praying._ The Bible says that when we are afraid it's because we have not been made perfect in love. \"There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love\" (1 John 4:18). The only love that is perfect is the love of God. The way you get perfected in His love is to draw close to Him and let Him fill you with His love. When you do, He will deliver you from all fear.\n\n2. _Get rid of ungodly fear by controlling what you receive into your mind_. The things of the world often make us afraid. What kind of input are you receiving from the world? Is any of it causing fear in you? How could you change that? Do you go to scary movies or watch frightening television shows? Read the Word instead. If watching the news scares you, either don't watch it or use it as a time to pray for the people and situations you hear about in it. Do whatever you can to stay close to God (for instance, you could play worship music or sing praise songs). Fear disappears in the presence of the Lord.\n\n3. _Get rid of ungodly fear by being in the Word of God._ Many times in my life when I was afraid, I found that all fear left me just from reading the Bible. Knowing what God's Word says about our fear and the promises He has given us can make all the difference. And in the face of fear, speaking the Word out loud is a powerful weapon against it. You don't even have to be reading or speaking Scriptures specifically about fear. Reading anywhere in the Bible can take away fear, because the Spirit of the Lord can be found on every page.\n\n4. _Get rid of ungodly fear by living in the fear of the Lord._ The more you get to know the Lord and understand who He is, the more you will reverence Him and fear His displeasure. This is called the fear of the Lord, and it makes you want to obey Him. It's what draws you closer to God and increases your longing for more of Him. It makes you forget all the things that cause you fear, because they pale in comparison to His awesome power. When you have the fear of the Lord, you fear what your life would be like without Him.\n\n### Godly Fear\n\nNoah is a good example of godly fear. The reason he spent all that time preparing the ark for the coming flood was because he had the fear of the Lord. \"By faith Noah, being divinely warned of things not yet seen, moved with godly fear, prepared an ark for the saving of his household, by which he condemned the world and became heir of the righteousness which is according to faith\" (Hebrews 11:7). People laughed and made fun of him while he was building the ark, but he believed God, and he cared more about what God said than what man said. And it ended up saving his life. The best thing you can do is to \"fear God and keep His commandments, for this is man's all\" (Ecclesiastes 12:13). It will save your life too.\n\n### Seven Good Things That Come from Fearing God\n\n1. _The blessing of God's provision_. \"Oh, fear the LORD, you His saints! There is no want to those who fear Him\" (Psalm 34:9).\n\n2. _The blessing of God's protection_. \"The fear of the Lord leads to life, and he who has it will abide in satisfaction; he will not be visited with evil\" (Proverbs 19:23).\n\n3. _The blessing of God's mercy_. \"For as the heavens are high above the earth, so great is His mercy toward those who fear Him\" (Psalm 103:11).\n\n4. _The blessing of God's goodness_. \"Oh, how great is Your goodness, which You have laid up for those who fear You, which You have prepared for those who trust in You in the presence of the sons of men!\" (Psalm 31:19).\n\n5. _The blessing of God's abundance_. \"By humility and the fear of the LORD are riches and honor and life\" (Proverbs 22:4).\n\n6. _The blessing of God's response_. \"He will fulfill the desire of those who fear Him; He also will hear their cry and save them\" (Psalm 145:19).\n\n7. _The blessing of God's freedom_. \"By the fear of the LORD one departs from evil\" (Proverbs 16:6).\n\nGod has secrets. It's not that He doesn't want you to know these things, it's that He wants you to get close to Him and find out. \"The secret of the LORD is with those who fear Him, and He will show them His covenant\" (Psalm 25:14). God wants you to walk with Him and talk with Him and have the kind of relationship with Him where He shares Himself with you and tells you things you didn't know before and wouldn't know unless He revealed them to you. When you get close enough and quiet enough, He will whisper a secret to your heart and it will change your life. In that moment, all your fear will be gone. Ask God to speak to you today.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , You are my light and my salvation. You are the strength of my life. Of whom, then, shall I be afraid? Even though an entire army may surround me and go to war against me, my heart will not fear (Psalm 27:1-3). I will be strong and of good courage, for I know that You are with me wherever I go (Joshua 1:9). Free me from all ungodly fear, for I know that fear is never of You.\n\nGuard my heart and mind from the spirit of fear. What I am afraid of today is (name anything that causes you to have fear). Take that fear and replace it with Your perfect love. If I have any thoughts in my mind that are fueled by fear, reveal them to me. If I have gotten my mind off of You and on my circumstances, help me to reverse that process so that my mind is off my circumstances and on You. Show me where I allow fear to take root and help me to put a stop to it. Take away any fear of rejection and all fear of man from within me and replace it with the fear of the Lord.\n\nYour Word says that You will put fear in the hearts of Your people and You will not turn away from doing them good (Jeremiah 32:40). I pray that You would do that for me. I know that You have not given me a spirit of fear, so I reject that and instead claim the power, love, and sound mind You have for me. \"Oh, how great is Your goodness, which You have laid up for those who fear You\" (Psalm 31:19). Because I have received a kingdom which cannot be shaken, may I have grace by which to serve You acceptably with reverence and godly fear all the days of my life (Hebrews 12:28).\n\nThank You that \"the fear of the LORD leads to life, and he who has it will abide in satisfaction; he will not be visited with evil\" (Proverbs 19:23). Help me to grow in fear and reverence of You so that I may please You and escape the plans of evil for my life. Thank You that those who fear You will never lack any good thing.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nGod has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power  \nand of love and of a sound mind.  \n **2 T IMOTHY 1:7**\n\nThere is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out  \nfear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears  \nhas not been made perfect in love.  \n **1 J OHN 4:18**\n\nTeach me Your way, O LORD; I will walk in Your  \ntruth; unite my heart to fear Your name.  \n **P SALM 86:11**\n\nThen they will call on me, but I will not answer;  \nthey will seek me diligently, but they will not find  \nme. Because they hated knowledge and did not  \nchoose the fear of the LORD.  \n **P ROVERBS 1:28, 29**\n\nYes, if you cry out for discernment, and lift up your  \nvoice for understanding, if you seek her as silver, and  \nsearch for her as for hidden treasures; then you  \nwill understand the fear of the LORD, and find  \nthe knowledge of God.  \n **P ROVERBS 2:3-5**\n\n##   CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE\n\n## [Lord, Use Me to Touch the  \nLives of Others](contents.html#rechapter25)\n\nDuring the months when I was writing _The Power of a Praying \u00ae Wife_, I felt led by the Holy Spirit to pray something I had never prayed before. I have always asked God to help me write every book, but this time in addition to that I felt led by the Spirit to pray that this would be a breakthrough book in terms of how many people it would reach. I had written three books previously and had never thought to pray that way. I shared what I was feeling with my prayer group, and they were in complete agreement. Together we prayed that God would take this book to the ends of the earth and see that it was translated into many other languages. I could hardly believe I was asking God for something so grand, but I felt with all my heart this was exactly the way God wanted us to pray. We prayed that prayer every week until long after the book was published.\n\nOver the next several years, publishers from different countries around the world wrote to ask for permission to translate the book in their nation's language and publish it. Soon copies of my book arrived at my door that were translated into French, German, Portuguese, Nigerian, Indian, Dutch, Hungarian, Korean, Spanish, Japanese, Indonesian, and Afrikaans. Each time my heart leaped with joy that God had answered my prayer so powerfully.\n\nOne day I received a box of my books that had been translated into Chinese, and I broke down and cried. It was something I never dreamed possible. I could picture all these precious Chinese women, whom I would never meet, reading this book and learning to pray for their families. There was no way I could physically travel all over the world to reach this many people in all these different countries, and I knew I would never get to China. But the message God had given me would. These people will never know me, but they will know God better.\n\nWhat a powerful answer to prayer. The members of my prayer group and I have spoken many times about the first day we prayed that prayer and what God has done in response to it. Since then, with each book I have written I have prayed, \"God, use me to touch the lives of others around the world with Your love, mercy, hope, and truth.\" You can pray that prayer too, and God will use your abilities and talents to touch others powerfully. When your heart is to give to others from what God has given to you, He will enable you to do that.\n\nGiving to God and to other people is such a vitally important part of our life on this earth that we can never achieve all we want to see happen in our lives if we're not doing that. It's a major factor in realizing the complete purposes of God for us. We can never be truly whole and fulfilled or find any lasting peace unless we are giving to others. We release the flow of God's blessings _to_ us by letting them flow _through_ us. Giving to God and to others creates a vacuum into which God pours more blessings. If we stop up that flow, we stop up our lives. We must pray that God will show us how give and enable us to do it.\n\n### The Gift of Prayer\n\nMany people have written to me and told me how my books have helped save their marriages, their children, or their lives. They asked what they could do for me in return. I always respond by saying, \"The greatest thing you can do for me is to pray for me. Pray for my protection, my health, my family, and my marriage. Pray for me to have a clear mind and be able to write books that will draw people to the Lord so He can transform their lives.\" There is no greater gift I can receive than someone's prayers. I believe the prayers of thousands of people saved my life when I was in the hospital. If you were one of them, I am eternally grateful. I felt your prayers, and they are the reason I am alive today.\n\nPrayer is the greatest gift we can give to anyone. Of course, if someone needs food, clothes, and a place to live, those needs must be met. But in giving that way, we can't neglect to pray for them as well. Material things are temporary, but our prayers for another person can affect them for a lifetime.\n\nWe can never move into all God has for us until we first move into intercessory prayer. This is one part of our calling that we have in common, because we are _all_ called to intercede for others. God wants us to love others enough to lay down our lives for them in prayer.\n\nOn September 11, intercessors began immediately to pray for the people involved in the tragedies in New York City, Pennsylvania, and Washington, D.C. Then from all over the United States people drove to New York City because they wanted to help. They stood in line to give blood. They gave money to bereaved families. Everyone did what they could, but it all started with prayer. \"Let us not love in word or in tongue, but in deed and in truth\" (1 John 3:18). If you love God, you will love people and it will motivate you to do whatever you can to help them. Prayer is a good place to start.\n\nGod wants us to give to others. He says if we don't help others in need, we don't really love Him. \"But whoever has this world's goods, and sees his brother in need, and shuts up his heart from him, how does the love of God abide in him?\" (1 John 3:17). \"Let no one seek his own, but each one the other's well-being\" (1 Corinthians 10:24). \"He who has a generous eye will be blessed, for he gives of his bread to the poor\" (Proverbs 22:9). The greatest blessings will come to you when you ask God to use you to touch the lives of others.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , help me to serve You the way You want me to. Reveal to me any area of my life where I should be giving to someone right now. Open my eyes to see the need. Give me a generous heart to give to the poor. Help me to be a good steward of the blessings You have given me by sharing what I have with others. Show me whom You want me to extend my hand to at this time. Fill me with Your love for all people, and help me to communicate it in a way that can be clearly perceived. Use me to touch the lives of others with the hope that is in me.\n\nHelp me to give to You the way I should. I don't want to rob You of anything that is due You. Lord, I know that where my treasure is, there my heart will be also (Matthew 6:21). May my greatest treasure always be in serving You.\n\nLord, show me what You want me to do today to be a blessing to others around me. Specifically, show me how I can serve my family, my friends, my church, and the people whom You put in my life. I don't want to get so wrapped up in my own life that I don't see the opportunity for ministering Your life to others. Show me what You want me to do and enable me to do it. Give me all I need to minister life, hope, help, and healing to others. Make me to be one of Your faithful intercessors, and teach me how to pray in power. Help me to make a big difference in the world because You are working through me to touch the lives of others for Your glory.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nAs each one has received a gift, minister it to one  \nanother, as good stewards of the manifold grace of  \nGod. If anyone speaks, let him speak as the oracles of  \nGod. If anyone ministers, let him do it as with the  \nability which God supplies, that in all things God  \nmay be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom  \nbelongs the glory and the dominion forever and ever.  \n **1 P ETER 4:10-11**\n\nBy this we know love, because He laid down His life  \nfor us. And we also ought to lay down our  \nlives for the brethren.  \n **1 J OHN 3:16**\n\nAnd let us not grow weary while doing good, for in  \ndue season we shall reap if we do not lose heart.  \n **G ALATIANS 6:9**\n\nThose who are wise shall shine like the brightness  \nof the firmament, and those who turn many to  \nrighteousness like the stars forever and ever.  \n **D ANIEL 12:3**\n\nMost assuredly, I say to you, he who believes in Me,  \nthe works that I do he will do also; and greater works  \nthan these he will do, because I go to My Father.  \nAnd whatever you ask in My name, that I will do,  \nthat the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you  \nask anything in My name, I will do it.  \n **J OHN 14:12-14**\n\n##   CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX\n\n## [Lord, Train Me to Speak  \nOnly Words That Bring Life](contents.html#rechapter26)\n\nWhen I was 14, I introduced a neighbor boy to one of my girlfriends as \"Fat Mike.\" All the other kids called him \"Fat Mike\" to distinguish him from the other Mikes who weren't. The moment I did that, however, I saw a hurt look in his eyes, and I realized that this was not a name _he_ called himself. I felt very bad about that because I never intended to hurt him. In fact, I thought Mike was good-looking, and I didn't find his being on the heavy side as unattractive. But he obviously did. I just thought this was a funny nickname that he was okay with. He obviously wasn't. I was too ignorant at the time to realize no one feels good about a name like that. And I was also too embarrassed and immature to apologize. I hoped that by pretending the entire incident didn't happen that he would forget about it and everything would be fine.\n\nI moved away not long after that and never saw him again. I didn't think much about that incident until about 15 years later, after I became a believer. Wanting to be completely right with God and mend the past, I asked the Lord to bring to my mind anything I needed to be forgiven of so I could confess it to Him. My mind was flooded with many memories of things I had done wrong, and one of them was my introduction of Mike. I felt terrible about my unintentionally cruel and thoughtless words and the damage they must have done. I couldn't believe that after all the times I had been hurt in my life by the callous comments of others, I had done the same thing to someone else. I asked God to forgive me for being so unloving and stupid.\n\nIf I could have found Mike and apologized to him in person, I would have. But I couldn't, so I tried to make it up to him by praying that God would bless his life in every way. I prayed that somehow the words I said would be retracted from his memory or at least lose their sting and he would be healed of any pain my comment must have caused him. I prayed he would be able to forgive me. I prayed I could forgive myself.\n\nOne of areas that can cause the greatest trouble in our lives is located on the face between the chin and the nose. With our mouth we can say things we shouldn't and end up hurting others and paying the consequences. I was paying the consequences for words I had said 15 years ago. We can't take our words back once we speak them. All we can do is apologize and hope to be forgiven by the offended party. The best way to make sure that what comes out of our mouth is good is to put thoughts in our heart that are good. \"Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks\" (Matthew 12:34). If we fill our heart with God's truth and God's love, that's what will come out.\n\nHave you ever been around someone who complains all the time or speaks negatively about themselves and others? Isn't it exhausting? Have you been with the kind of person who you never knew what horrible thing might come out of their mouth? You can hardly wait to get away from them. The Bible says we are to \"do all things without complaining and disputing\" (Philippians 2:14). If we complain, it reflects our lack of faith in God. It proves that we don't believe God is in charge and can take care of us. It suggests that we don't trust God will answer prayer. It shows we are not praying. Being around people with such an obvious lack of faith is depleting.\n\nImagine if every time we opened our mouths we spoke words that were laced with healing, edification, encouragement, comfort, wisdom, love, and truth. That's possible to do if we ask God to help us. It's dangerous to speak whatever comes into your mind\u2014unless what comes into your mind is good. If you have your mind fixed on good things, then the words of your mouth will reflect that.\n\n### Eight Good Things to Think About Daily\n\n(From Philippians 4:8)\n\n1. _Whatever things are true_. If you think about what is honest, genuine, authentic, sincere, faithful, accurate, and truthful, then you won't be saying anything false, incorrect, erroneous, deceitful, or untrue.\n\n2. _Whatever things are noble_. If you think about what is admirable, high quality, excellent, magnanimous, superior, or honorable, then you won't be saying anything that is base, petty, mean, dishonorable, or low-minded.\n\n3. _Whatever things are just_. If you think about what is fair, reasonable, equitable, proper, lawful, right, correct, deserved, upright, honorable, and seemly, then you won't be saying anything that is unjustified, biased, unreasonable, unlawful, or unfair.\n\n4. _Whatever things are pure._ If you think about what is clean, clear, spotless, chaste, unsullied, undefiled, or untainted with evil, then you won't be saying anything that is inferior, tainted, adulterated, defiled, polluted, corrupted, tarnished, or unholy.\n\n5. _Whatever things are lovely_. If you think about what is pleasing, agreeable, charming, satisfying, or splendid, then you won't be saying anything that is unpleasant, offensive, disagreeable, revolting, unlovely, ominous, or ugly.\n\n6. _Whatever things are of good report._ If you think about what is admirable, winsome, worthwhile, recommended, positive, or worthy of repeating, then you won't be saying anything that is negative, discouraging, undesirable, or full of bad news, gossip, and rumor.\n\n7. _Whatever things are virtuous._ If you think about what is moral, ethical, upright, excellent, good, impressive, or conforming to high moral standards, then you won't be saying anything that is depraved, unethical, licentious, bad, self-indulgent, dissipated, evil, or immoral.\n\n8. _Whatever things are praiseworthy._ If you think about what is laudable, admirable, commendable, valuable, acclaimed, applauded, glorified, exalted, honored, or approved of, then you won't be saying anything that is critical, condemning, deprecating, disapproving, disparaging, denouncing, belittling, or depressing.\n\n### When a Wise Woman Speaks\n\n_When a wise woman speaks, she gives a reason for the hope that is within her._ The most important words we can speak are ones that explain our faith to anyone who asks or who will listen. We must be able to give a reason for the hope we have within us (1 Peter 3:15). We have to pray that God will help us become bold enough to clearly explain our faith in God. We have to ask God to help us tell others why we call Jesus our Messiah, why we can't live without the Holy Spirit, and why we choose to live God's way. And we must be able to do this in a manner that is loving and humble, otherwise we will alienate those whom God wants to draw to Himself. If the love of God and the testimony of His goodness are not in our heart, then they will not come out of our mouth. And what we say will not draw people to the Lord. It may, in fact, do the exact opposite.\n\n_When a wise woman speaks, she knows that timing is important._ When things need to be said that are difficult for the hearer to receive, timing is everything. Certain words cannot be uttered with any success if the person listening is not open and ready to hear them. It's important to discern that, and the only way to know for certain when to speak and what to say is to pray about it in advance. The Bible says that we are not to be too hasty to speak (Proverbs 29:20). A wise woman knows she shouldn't share every single thought that comes into her head. \"A fool vents all his feelings, but a wise man holds them back\" (Proverbs 29:11). You may have good things to say, but people aren't always ready to hear them. Only God knows for sure when someone is ready. Ask Him to show you.\n\n_When a wise woman speaks, she tells the truth._ When we don't speak the truth, we hurt others as well as ourselves. \"Therefore, putting away lying, 'Let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor,' for we are members of one another\" (Ephesians 4:25). But we can't run around speaking the truth without wisdom, sensitivity, and a sense of the Lord's timing. People don't want to hear every bit of truth about themselves every moment. It's too much for them. Sometimes it's better to say nothing and pray for God to show you when a person is ready to hear the truth.\n\n_When a wise woman speaks, she doesn't talk too much._ We have to be careful that we don't spend more time talking than is necessary. \"A fool's voice is known by his many words\" (Ecclesiastes 5:3). I always told my prayer group that we shouldn't spend more time talking about our requests than we do praying for them. And we can't just spill words out of our mouth without giving thought to what we are saying. We will give account of every idle word in the day of judgment (Matthew 12:36). This is a very scary thought. We must ask God to make us wise in the amount of talking we do.\n\n_When a wise woman speaks, her words are gracious._ We can't speak words that are mean, insensitive, harsh, coarse, rude, deceitful, offensive, or arrogant without reaping the consequences. With our words we will either build lives or we will tear them down. \"Those things which proceed out of the mouth come from the heart, and they defile a man\" (Matthew 15:18). \"The words of a wise man's mouth are gracious, but the lips of a fool shall swallow him up\" (Ecclesiastes 10:12). Ask God to create in you a clean heart so filled with His Spirit, His love, and His truth that it will overflow love, truth, and healing in your speech. Ask Him to help you find words that speak life to those around you.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , help me be a person who speaks words that build up and not tear down. Help me to speak life into the situations and people around me, and not death. Fill my heart afresh each day with Your Holy Spirit so that Your love and goodness overflow from my heart and my mouth. Help me to speak only about things that are true, noble, just, pure, lovely, of good report, virtuous, and praiseworthy. \"Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O LORD, my strength and my Redeemer\" (Psalm 19:14). Keep my mouth from speaking any evil or anything that is not true. Holy Spirit of truth, guide me in all truth. Help me to \"speak as the oracles of God\" and with the ability You supply so that You may be glorified (1 Peter 4:11). May every word I speak reflect Your purity and love.\n\nYour Word says that \"the preparations of the heart belong to man, but the answer of the tongue is from the LORD\" (Proverbs 16:1). I will prepare my heart by being in your Word every day and obeying Your laws. I will prepare my heart by worshiping You and giving thanks in all things. Fill my heart with love, peace, and joy so that it will flow from my mouth. Convict me when I complain or speak negatively. Help me not to speak too quickly or too much. Help me not to speak words that miscommunicate. I pray You would give me the words to say every time I speak. Show me when to speak and when not to. And when I do speak, give me words to say that will bring life and edification.\n\nHelp me to be a woman who speaks wisely, graciously, and clearly and never foolishly, rudely, or insensitively. Give me words that speak of the hope that is within me so I can explain my faith in a persuasive and compelling way. May the words I speak bring others into a fuller knowledge of You.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nHe who would love life and see good days,  \nlet him refrain his tongue from evil, and his  \nlips from speaking deceit.  \n **1 P ETER 3:10**\n\nThe heart of the wise teaches his mouth,  \nand adds learning to his lips.  \n **P ROVERBS 16:23**\n\nSanctify the Lord God in your hearts, and always be  \nready to give a defense to everyone who asks you a  \nreason for the hope that is in you, with meekness and  \nfear; having a good conscience, that when they  \ndefame you as evildoers, those who revile your good  \nconduct in Christ may be ashamed. For it is better,  \nif it is the will of God, to suffer for doing  \ngood than for doing evil.  \n **1 P ETER 3:15-17**\n\nPleasant words are like a honeycomb, sweetness  \nto the soul and health to the bones.  \n **P ROVERBS 16:24**\n\nRighteous lips are the delight of kings, and they love  \nhim who speaks what is right.  \n **P ROVERBS 16:13**\n\n##   CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN\n\n## [Lord, Transform Me  \ninto a Woman of  \nMountain-Moving Faith](contents.html#rechapter27)\n\nOn my tenth birthday, I received a necklace that consisted of a small glass ball hanging from a delicate gold chain. Inside the ball was the tiniest mustard seed. I thought at the time, _Why in the world did they bother putting a seed in there that was so small it could hardly be seen._ Obviously, I didn't get the point.\n\nIt wasn't until some time later that I learned the significance of that little seed. Jesus said, \"If you have faith as a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there', and it will move; and nothing will be impossible for you\" (Matthew 17:20). I've since thought a lot about how tiny that seed was. If that's all the faith it takes to move mountains, then surely I can come up with enough to move the obstacles in my life.\n\nGod takes the tiniest bit of faith we have and makes it grow into something big when we act on it. The Bible says that \"God has dealt to each one a measure of faith\" (Romans 12:3). We already have some faith to start with. When we step out in that faith, God _increases_ our faith. In other words, acting in faith begets more faith.\n\nWhether you realize it or not, you are living by faith everyday. Each time you go to a doctor, you trust he will do the right thing. When you buy medicine from the pharmacist, you believe he will fill your prescription correctly. When you go to a restaurant, you have faith they will not poison you. (Some restaurants require more faith than others.) How much easier and more certain is it to trust God?\n\nWe have no idea what great things God wants to do through us if we would just step out in faith when He asks us to. That's why He lets us go through some difficult times. Times when we feel weak and vulnerable. He allows certain things to happen so that we will turn to Him and give Him our full attention. It's in those times, when we are forced to pray in greater faith, that our faith grows stronger.\n\nJesus said, \"According to your faith let it be to you\" (Matthew 9:29). This could be a frightening thought, depending on the kind of faith you have. But there are things we can do to increase our faith, such as read the Word of God. Faith comes by simply hearing it (Romans 10:17). When you take the promises and truths in His Word and declare them out loud, you'll sense your faith increasing.\n\nPraying increases our faith as well because it's how we reach out and touch God. At one point a woman reached out to the Lord believing that if she just \"touched the hem of His garment\" she could be healed. Jesus told her that her faith had made her well, and she was healed at that very time (Matthew 9:20-22). Every time we reach out and touch Him in prayer, our lives are healed in some way and our faith is increased.\n\nEvery day it becomes more and more crucial that we have faith. There will be times in each of our lives when we will need the kind of faith that makes the difference between success or failure, winning or losing, life or death. That's why asking for more faith must be an ongoing prayer. No matter how much faith you have, God can increase it.\n\nEven when your faith seems small, you can still speak in faith to the mountains in your life and tell them to move, and God will do the impossible. You can pray for the crippled parts of your life to be healed and God will restore them. You can ask God to increase your faith and give you boldness to act on it, and He will do it.\n\nWhat promise of God would you like to claim in faith as your own right now? What prayer would you like to boldly pray in faith and see answered? What would you like to see accomplished in your life, or in the life of someone you know, that would take a prayer of great faith? Ask God to take that seed you have and grow it into a giant tree of faith so you can see these things come to pass.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , increase my faith. Teach me how to \"walk by faith, not by sight\" (2 Corinthians 5:7). Give me strength to stand strong on Your promises and believe Your every word. I don't want to be like the people who did not profit from hearing the Word because it wasn't mixed with faith (Hebrews 4:2). I know that \"faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God\" (Romans 10:17). Make my faith increase every time I hear or read Your Word. Help me to believe for Your promises to be fulfilled in me. I pray that the genuineness of my faith, which is more precious than gold that perishes even when it is tested by fire, will be glorifying to You, Lord (1 Peter 1:7).\n\nI know \"faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen\" (Hebrews 11:1). I know I have been \"saved through faith,\" and it is a gift from You (Ephesians 2:8). Increase my faith so that I can pray in power. Give me faith to believe for healing every time I pray for the sick. I don't want to see a need and then not have faith strong enough to pray and believe for the situation to change.\n\nHelp me to take the \"shield of faith\" to \"quench all the fiery darts of the wicked one\" (Ephesians 6:16). Help me \"to ask in faith, with no doubting.\" For I know that \"he who doubts is like a wave of the sea driven and tossed by the wind.\" I know that a doubter is double-minded and unstable and will not receive anything from You (James 1:6-8). I know that \"whatever is not from faith is sin\" (Romans 14:23). I confess any doubt I have as sin before You, and I ask You to forgive me. I don't want to hinder what You want to do in me and through me because of doubt. Increase my faith daily so that I can move mountains in Your name.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nWithout faith it is impossible to please Him, for he  \nwho comes to God must believe that  \nHe is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.  \n **H EBREWS 11:6**\n\nAll things are possible to him who believes.  \n **M ARK 9:23**\n\nIf you have faith as a mustard seed, you will say to  \nthis mountain, \"Move from here to there,\" and it will  \nmove; and nothing will be impossible for you.  \n **M ATTHEW 17:20**\n\nHaving been justified by faith, we have peace with  \nGod through our Lord Jesus Christ.  \n **R OMANS 5:1**\n\nIn this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little  \nwhile, if need be, you have been grieved by various  \ntrials, that the genuineness of your faith,  \nbeing much more precious than gold that perishes,  \nthough it is tested by fire, may be found to praise,  \nhonor, and glory at the revelation of Jesus Christ.  \n **1 P ETER 1:6-7**\n\n##   CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT\n\n## [Lord, Change Me into the  \nLikeness of Christ](contents.html#rechapter28)\n\nI recently heard a pastor speak about his experience as a missionary starting a church in a remote part of the world. He told how when he and his wife first arrived at the little village where they were going to plant this new church, they were shocked at how little the native people of that region wore in the way of clothing. It was a hot and humid land, so the men and women only wore strips of cloth that covered the area between their waist and mid-thigh. The women were completely topless. The first thing the pastor and his wife did was to instruct the ladies that they needed to be covered on top. In order to help them do that, the pastor sent for T-shirts to be delivered to the village.\n\nWhen the shirts arrived, one was given to each woman. They were very excited to receive them and eagerly took them home, promising to wear them when they came back. The next day when everyone gathered together again, the pastor and his wife were even more shocked than before. Each woman had taken her shirt and cut two large round holes out of the front of it so that when they put the shirts on, their breasts stuck through the holes.\n\nI laughed when I heard that story and wondered how many times God gives us something to cover us or to make us right with Him, and we cut out the part that we don't want so that our flesh can still stick through.\n\nNo wonder we aren't able change ourselves. We don't even understand what we're supposed to be changed to or why. Only God can open our eyes to see these things. That's why we have to pray the \"Change me, Lord\" prayer. I know it's one of the most frightening and difficult prayers to pray. We'd so much rather pray, \"Change _him_ , Lord\" or \"Change _her_ , Lord.\" Plus if we give the Lord _carte blanche_ to do whatever He wants in us, God only knows what He might do.\n\nBut there is a way we can pray that will change us, and it's not frightening. That is to pray, \"Make me more like Christ.\" Who doesn't want to exhibit the character of Jesus? Who doesn't want to be more like Him in every way?\n\n### Seven Good Ways to Be More Like Christ\n\n1. _Jesus was loving._ Not only was Jesus loving, but His love was beyond comprehension. We will never have to bear the sin of the world unto death the way He did, but He wants us to lay down our lives for people in other ways. \"By this we know love, because He laid down His life for us. And we also ought to lay down our lives for the brethren\" (1 John 3:16). His love can work miracles in your life and in the lives of people you touch. The love of God in you will grow and reproduce as you share it. \"A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another\" (John 13:34). Pray for God's love to be revealed in you as you reach out to the world around you.\n\n2. _Jesus was humble._ Jesus was Lord of the universe, yet \"He humbled Himself and became obedient to the point of death, even the death of the cross\" (Philippians 2:8). Even a fraction of His humility will get us a long way in this world, because it's such a rare commodity. And we need it because there is a steep price to pay for having pride. \"Everyone proud in heart is an abomination to the LORD; though they join forces, none will go unpunished\" (Proverbs 16:5). \"Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall\" (Proverbs 16:18). Nothing will speak louder to people around you than your own humility, because it will be a refreshing departure from the norm. Pray for God to give you a humble heart.\n\n3. _Jesus was faithful._ Jesus never wavered in His conviction and knowledge of who He was and why He was on earth. \"I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me\" (John 14:6). Even when He was tempted by Satan, He never faltered. We need to know with that same certainty who _He_ really is, so we can know who _we_ really are. Then we won't waver. Ask God to strengthen your inner being and make you as faithful as He is.\n\n4. _Jesus was giving._ Jesus gave of Himself to disciple a few men so that many lives would be touched. He gave of His power so that many would be healed, delivered, and made whole. \"If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another's feet. For I have given you an example, that you should do as I have done to you\" (John 13:14-15). His ultimate gift was His life. \"Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that you should follow His steps\" (1 Peter 2:21). When we don't feel we have anything to give, God supplies it all. \"God is able to make all grace abound toward you, that you, always having all sufficiency in all things, may have an abundance for every good work\" (2 Corinthians 9:8). Pray that God will fill you with His good gifts to give to those He brings into your life.\n\n5. _Jesus was separate._ Jesus was _in_ the world, but He was not a _part of_ the world. He came to _touch_ the world, but He never became _like_ the world. He was separate from the world, yet He changed the world around Him. We must pray that we can find that balance too. We can't stay so separate that we have no touch with the outside world. Nor can we be looking, living, talking, and acting so much like the world that people don't see anything different about us. Jesus never lost sight of where He was going. He always kept eternity in His perspective. We must do the same. Pray that you will always remember who you are, what you are called to do, and where you are going to spend eternity.\n\n6. _Jesus was obedient_. One of the most amazing things about Jesus was that even though He was Lord, He still did not do anything on His own. He prayed and did not act until He had instructions from God. We must live that way too. \"He who says he abides in Him ought himself also to walk just as He walked\" (1 John 2:6). Jesus was obedient to the point of death. Can there be any greater level of obedience? He did what He had to do because He knew the great things that would come out of it. We have to do the same, \"looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. For consider Him who endured such hostility from sinners against Himself, lest you become weary and discouraged in your souls\" (Hebrews 12:2-3). Ask God to help you die to yourself so that you can live for Him.\n\n7. _Jesus was light._ People are drawn to light. We want them to be drawn to the light of the Lord in us. Jesus said, \"I am the light of the world. He who follows Me shall not walk in darkness, but have the light of life\" (John 8:12). We don't want to walk in the dark. We want to be in the light as He is in the light. Ask God to make you more like Christ so that everyplace you go people will stop you and say, \"Tell me what you know.\" \"What is this special thing you have?\" \"What must I do to get what you've got?\" And you will be able to give them the reason for the light within you.\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , I want to be changed, and I pray those changes will begin today. I know I can't change myself in any way that is significant or lasting, but by the transforming power of Your Holy Spirit all things are possible. Grant me, according to the riches of Your glory, to be strengthened with might through Your Spirit in my inner being (Ephesians 3:16). Transform me into Your likeness. I know that You will supply all that I need according to Your riches in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:19).\n\nHelp me to become separate from the world without becoming isolated from it or turning my back on it. Show me when I am not humble and help me to resist pride of any kind. Let my humility be a testimony of Your Spirit in me. May Your love manifested in me be a witness of Your greatness. Teach me to love others the way You do.\n\nSoften my heart where it has become hard. Make me fresh where I have become stale. Lead me and instruct me where I have become unteachable. Make me to be faithful, giving, and obedient the way Jesus was. Where I am resistant to change, help me to trust Your work in my life. May Your light so shine in me that I become a light to all who know me. May it be not I who lives, but You who lives in me (Galatians 2:20). Make me to be so much like Christ that when people see me they will want to know You better.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nI have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I  \nwho live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I  \nnow live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of  \nGod, who loved me and gave Himself for me.  \n **G ALATIANS 2:20**\n\nThe Spirit Himself bears witness with our spirit that  \nwe are children of God, and if children, then  \nheirs\u2014heirs of God and joint heirs with Christ,  \nif indeed we suffer with Him, that we may  \nalso be glorified together.  \n **R OMANS 8:16-17**\n\nCome out from among them and be separate, says  \nthe Lord. Do not touch what is unclean, and I will  \nreceive you. I will be a Father to you, and you shall  \nbe my sons and daughters, says the LORD Almighty.  \n **2 C ORINTHIANS 6:17-18**\n\nMy grace is sufficient for you, for My strength  \nis made perfect in weakness. Therefore most gladly I  \nwill rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of  \nChrist may rest upon me.  \n **2 C ORINTHIANS 12:9**\n\nI can do all things through Christ  \nwho strengthens me.  \n **P HILIPPIANS 4:13**\n\n##   CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE\n\n## [Lord, Lift Me out of  \nMy Past](contents.html#rechapter29)\n\nImagine that you are running in a race, and you're trying to reach the goal and ultimately win the prize. But as hard as you try you can never get to the finish line because there is a heavy weight tied around one of your legs. You struggle to pull it along, but it slows you down and causes you to be so weary and exhausted that you are tempted to give up altogether. It doesn't occur to you that this is something you don't have to carry. It has been so much a part of you for so long that you never imagined life without it. Yet you can't finish the race and secure the prize God has for you until you become free of it.\n\nThis scenario is true for so many of us. We are trying to run the race of life, but we are having trouble getting up to speed. That's because we've been carrying excess baggage from the past around with us without even realizing it. In fact, we've carried it around with us for so long we think it's part of us. Some days are so hard we feel like giving up and getting out of the race. But I have good news. God wants to take that burden from you so you will never have to carry it again.\n\nWhether it's something that happened as long ago as your early childhood or as recently as yesterday, the past can keep you from moving into all God has for you. That's why He wants to set you free from it. And not only that, He wants to redeem and restore what has been lost or destroyed in your past and make it count for something important in your life now. The truth is, you can never move into the future God has for you if you are continually stuck in the past. When you received Jesus you became a new creation. He made _all_ things new in your life, and He wants you to live like it.\n\nGod says to forget the former things, but that's not easy to do. How do we forget what happened to us? Do we need to have amnesia? Or a frontal lobotomy? Must we live in denial? Do we have to pretend that the past did not happen? Should we have part of our brain liposuctioned? The answer is no to all of the above. We just have to pray that God will set us free from the past so we can live successfully in the present.\n\nOne of the great mysteries of the Lord is how He can take the horrible, the tragic, the painful, the devastating, the embarrassing, and the ruinous experiences and memories of our lives and not only heal them, but use them for good. It's not that He will make you unable to recall them, but He will heal you so thoroughly from their effects that you no longer think about them with any pain. He will give you a new life you enjoy so much you don't want to travel back in your mind to the old one. You will still have the memory, but you no longer have the pain. Instead, you will have praise in your heart for the way God has restored you to wholeness. And you will want to share your experience with others so that they can know this kind of deliverance, restoration, and healing is there for them too.\n\n### Intended for Good\n\nThe reason God doesn't want to wipe your past completely out of your memory is because He wants to use that part of your life for the work He has called you to do. He can take the worst thing about your past and make it to be your greatest blessing in the future. He will weave it into the foundation of your ministry to the world, and out of it you will bring the life of the Lord to other people.\n\nThat's why God wants you to learn from the past and witness firsthand how He can redeem it, but He doesn't want you living there. He wants you to read your past like a history book, but not like a prophecy for your future. He wants you to forget those things that are behind you and reach forward to those things which are ahead (Philippians 3:13).\n\nMany people never get to the future God has for them because they are perpetually stuck in the past. A good example of this are people who have experienced rejection in their past and still fear being rejected now. They expect to be rejected, so they read rejection into other people's words and actions. This causes them to always be hurt, afraid, angry, or bitter, and it makes them oversensitive to other people's comments. In other words, their _fear_ of rejection _causes_ the very rejection they feared. It becomes an endless cycle.\n\nWhatever weight from the past you are carrying will be observed by others, even if they don't know what it is. The bad things that happened to us, or the good things that _didn't_ happen to us, will be part of what we wear daily and people will see the total look even if they can't recall the specific details. But God will deliver you from your past and use it for His glory if you ask Him to.\n\n### Don't Look Back\n\nOnce you step out of the past it's important you don't keep looking over your shoulder to see if it's following you. That's what Lot's wife did, and it paralyzed her. It will paralyze you too. And it will definitely slow you down in the race. Good runners look forward and keep focused on the goal.\n\nEven if you have never had one bad thing happen to you in your life, or you have been completely delivered from every negative memory you ever had, you still need to pray to be free of your past. That's because even the good things of your past can keep you from allowing God to do a new thing now. If we get locked into what we did before, we may miss what God wants to do now. God is always wanting to take you to a new place in your life, and you will keep Him from doing that if you are hanging on to the way things have always been done. He will never allow us to rest on past success. If we rely on the way things have always been done, we aren't relying on Him. And that's the whole point.\n\nI guarantee that no matter how old you are, God has something new He wants to do in your life. Ask Him to show you what that is. Tell Him you intend to stay in the race and you don't want to carry any baggage from the past around with you. Tell Him you want to run in such a way so that you will obtain the prize (1 Corinthians 9:24).\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , I pray that You would set me free from my past. Wherever I have made the past my home I pray that You would deliver me, heal me, and redeem me from it. I choose to make my home with You. Help me to let go of anything I have held onto of my past that has kept me from moving into all You have for me. Enable me to put off all former ways of thinking and feeling and remembering (Ephesians 4:22-24). Give me the mind of Christ so I will be able to understand when I am being controlled by memories of past events.\n\nI don't want to tie myself to the past by neglecting to forgive any person or event associated with it. Help me to forgive what needs to be forgiven. Specifically, I pray that You would deliver me from the effects of (name any painful or bad memory you have). I release my past to You and everyone associated with it so You can restore what has been lost. Everything that was done to me or I have done which causes me pain, I surrender to You. May it no longer torment me or affect what I do today. Make me glad according to the days in which I have been afflicted and the years I have seen evil (Psalm 90:15). Thank You that You make all things new and You are making me new in every way (Revelation 21:5).\n\nHelp me to keep my eyes looking straight ahead and not back on the former days and old ways of doing things. I know You want to do something new in my life today. Help me to concentrate on where I am to go now and not where I have been. Release me from the past so I can move out of it and into the future You have for me.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nIf anyone is in Christ, He is a new creation;  \nold things have passed away; behold all  \nthings have become new.  \n **2 C ORINTHIANS 5:17**\n\nDo not remember the former things, nor consider the  \nthings of old. Behold, I will do a new thing,  \nnow it shall spring forth; shall you not know it?  \nI will even make a road in the wilderness  \nand rivers in the desert.  \n **I SAIAH 43:18-19**\n\nBrethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended;  \nbut one thing I do, forgetting those  \nthings which are behind and reaching forward to  \nthose things which are ahead, I press toward  \nthe goal for the prize of the upward call  \nof God in Christ Jesus.  \n **P HILIPPIANS 3:13-14**\n\nLet your eyes look straight ahead, and your eyelids  \nlook right before you. Ponder the path of your feet,  \nand let all your ways be established.  \nDo not turn to the right or the left;  \nremove your foot from evil.  \n **P ROVERBS 4:25-27**\n\nGod will wipe away every tear from their eyes;  \nthere shall be no more death,  \nnor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain,  \nfor the former things have passed away.  \n **R EVELATION 21:4**\n\n##   CHAPTER THIRTY\n\n## [Lord, Lead Me into the Future  \nYou Have for Me](contents.html#rechapter30)\n\nI'm writing this chapter as a letter to you personally, my dear sister in Christ, so that if you become anxious about your future, or you need encouragement about what is ahead, you can read it and hopefully hear God speak to your heart. For this is really His message to all of us.\n\nDear___________________(please fill in your name),\n\nI am writing this because I want to remind you of the great future God has for you. I know this because He said so. He says you have not seen, nor heard, nor have even imagined anything as great as what He has prepared for you (1 Corinthians 2:9). You have no idea how great your future is. He says that what He has for you is so great that if you truly understood it, you would feel \"that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed\" in you (Romans 8:18). That means whatever you envision for your life right now is already too small.\n\nAlthough God promises you a future full of hope and blessing, it's not going to happen automatically. There are some things _you_ have to do. One of them is pray about it (Jeremiah 29:11-13). Another is obey God. But don't worry, God will help you with both of those if you ask Him. The Holy Spirit is God's guarantee to you that He will help you do what you need to do and bring to pass everything He promised (Ephesians 1:13-14). Just know that every time you pray and obey, you are investing in your future.\n\nAlthough we live in a world where everything in our lives can change in an instant, and we can't be certain what tomorrow will bring, God is unchanging. You may already have lost your false sense of security, and this is good because God wants you to know that your only _real_ security is found in Him. Although you may not know the specific details about what is ahead, you can trust that God knows. And He will get you safely where you need to go. In fact, the way to get to the future God has for you is to walk with Him today.\n\nRemember, my precious sister in the Lord, that walking with God doesn't mean there won't be obstacles. Satan will see to it that there are. While God has a plan for your future that is good, the devil has one too and it's not good. But the devil's plan for your life cannot succeed as long as you are walking with God, living in obedience to His ways, worshiping only Him, standing strong in His Word, and praying without ceasing. God's plan for your life won't happen without a struggle, however, so don't give up when times get tough. Just keep on doing what's right and resist the temptation to quit. Ask God to give you the strength and endurance you need to do what you have to do.\n\nDon't judge your future by what you read in the newspapers or the words someone spoke over you one time. Your future is in _God's_ hands. The only thing that is important is what _He_ says about it. He doesn't want you to be concerned about your future anyway. He wants you to be concerned with _Him_ , because _He_ is your future.\n\nRemember that you are God's daughter and He loves you. As you _walk_ with Him, you will become more like Him every day (1 John 3:1-3). As you _look_ to Him, you will be \"transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as by the Spirit of the Lord\" (2 Corinthians 3:18). As you _live_ with Him, He will take you from strength to strength. So even though your \"outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day\" (2 Corinthians 4:16).\n\nDon't become discouraged if things don't happen as fast as you would like them to. They never do. God wants you to learn patience. Our perspective is temporal. His is eternal. So don't be concerned if you are not seeing all that you want in response to your prayers. You will. If you draw close to God and do what He asks you to do, if you worship Him in spirit and in truth, if you love others and give of yourself to them, if you speak God's Word in faith and pray, you will see God's blessings poured out on your life.\n\nI believe that we are denied certain things for a time because God wants us to fervently pray and intercede for them. That's because He wants to do something great in response to our prayers, something that can _only_ be birthed in prayer. Do you remember how Hannah prayed long and fervently for a child (1 Samuel 1:1-28)? When God finally answered her prayer, it wasn't just any child who was born. Samuel was one of the world's greatest prophets and most influential judges in Israel's history. If she had not prayed so fervently, that might not have happened. There may be things that won't happen in your life unless you are praying that long and fervently too.\n\nIf you start being consumed by the details of life, and it feels as if your future won't ever be any different than it is at this moment, please know the truth is quite the opposite. It's at these very times, when you feel as though you're not getting anywhere, or you're missing the future God has for you, that God is actually _preparing_ you for your future. And when the time is right, He has been known to do a very quick work. While it's good to set goals, don't look so far ahead that you become overwhelmed. Look to the Lord instead. Remember that \"the Lord is near to all who call upon Him, to all who call upon Him in truth. He will fulfill the desire of those who fear Him; He also will hear their cry and save them\" (Psalm 145:18-19).\n\nOne day you will be with God in heaven. And He will wipe away every tear from your eyes and \"there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away\" (Revelation 21:4). You want to be able to reach the end of your life and say, \"I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Finally, there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will give to me on that Day, and not to me only but also to all who have loved His appearing\" (2 Timothy 4:7-8). Jesus said, \"Let not your heart be troubled; you believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father's house are many mansions; if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself; that where I am, there you may be also\" (John 14:1-3). He promises that because you love Him, your eternal future in heaven with Him is secure.\n\nIn the meantime I know that you want to do something significant for the Lord and move into new areas of service for Him. God is looking for women who will be committed to living His way and stepping into the purposes He has for their lives. He wants a woman who is willing to sacrifice herself for His kingdom, who is willing to say, \"Not my will, but Yours be done.\" You are one of those women. I pray that you will be equipped and ready when God says, \"Now is the time,\" and the doors of opportunity open. Just keep doing what's right and when you least expect it, you will get a call from God giving you your assignment.\n\nRemember, God \"is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us\" (Ephesians 3:20). He has more for you than you can imagine. And now may \"the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that you may abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit\" (Romans 15:13). Stay focused on God, and He will keep you in perfect peace as He moves you into the future He has for you.\n\nYour sister in Christ,\n\n_Stormie Omartian_\n\n_My Prayer to God_\n\n_Lord_ , I put my future in Your hands and ask that You would give me total peace about it. I don't want to be trying to secure my future with my own plans. I want to be in the center of _Your_ plans, knowing that You have given me everything I need for what is ahead. I pray You would give me strength to endure without giving up. You have said that \"he who endures to the end will be saved\" (Matthew 10:22). Help me to run the race in a way that I shall finish strong and receive the prize You have for me (1 Corinthians 9:24). Help me to be always watchful in my prayers, because I don't know when the end of my life will be (1 Peter 4:7).\n\nI know Your thoughts toward me are of peace, to give me a future and a hope (Jeremiah 29:11). I know that You have saved me and called me with a holy calling, not according to my works, but according to Your own purpose and grace (2 Timothy 1:9). Thank You, Holy Spirit, that You are always with me and will guide me on the path so that I won't lose my way.\n\nMove me into powerful ministry that will impact the lives of others for Your kingdom and Your glory. I humble myself under Your mighty hand, O God, knowing that You will lift me up in due time. I cast all my care upon You, knowing that You care for me and will not let me fall (1 Peter 5:6-7). I reach out for Your hand today so I can walk with You into the future You have for me.\n\n###   _G OD'S PROMISES TO ME_\n\nI know the thoughts I think toward you, says the  \nLORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you  \na future and a hope. Then you will call on Me and go  \nand pray to Me, and I will listen to you.  \nAnd you will seek Me and find Me, when you search  \nfor me with all your heart.  \n **J EREMIAH 29:11-13**\n\nThose who are planted in the house of the LORD  \nshall flourish in the courts of our God. They shall  \nstill bear fruit in old age; they shall be fresh and  \nflourishing, to declare that the LORD is upright.  \n **P SALM 92:13-15**\n\nI am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels  \nnor principalities nor powers, nor  \nthings present nor things to come, nor height nor depth,  \nnor any other created thing, shall be able to  \nseparate us from the love of God which is  \nin Christ Jesus our Lord.  \n **R OMANS 8:38-39**\n\nBut the path of the just is like the shining sun,  \nthat shines ever brighter unto the perfect day.  \n **P ROVERBS 4:18**\n\nArise, shine; for your light has come! And the glory  \nof the LORD is risen upon you. For behold, the  \ndarkness shall cover the earth, and deep darkness the  \npeople; but the LORD will arise over you, and His  \nglory will be seen upon you.  \n **I SAIAH 60:1-2**\n\n### [**O THER BOOKS  \nBY STORMIE OMARTIAN**](contents.html#oth)\n\n#### THE POWER OF A PRAYING\u00ae WIFE\n\nStormie shares how wives can develop a deeper relationship with their husbands by praying for them. With this practical advice on praying for specific areas, including decision-making, fears, spiritual strength, and sexuality, women will discover the fulfilling marriage God intended.\n\n#### THE POWER OF A PRAYING\u00ae HUSBAND\n\nBuilding on the success of _The Power of a Praying_ \u00ae _Wife_ , Stormie offers this guide to help husbands pray more effectively for their wives. Each chapter features comments from well-known Christian men, biblical wisdom, and prayer ideas.\n\n#### THE POWER OF A PRAYING\u00ae PARENT\n\nThis powerful book for parents offers 30 easy-to-read chapters that focus on specific areas of prayers for children. This personal, practical guide leads the way to enriched, strong prayer lives for both moms and dads.\n\n#### THE POWER OF A PRAYING\u00ae NATION\n\nLearn to intercede in practical ways for our political leaders, military personnel, teachers, and those who work in the media. Affect the strength and spiritual life of our nation through prayer.\n\n#### JUST ENOUGH LIGHT FOR THE STEP I'M ON\n\nNew Christians and those experiencing life changes or difficult times will appreciate Stormie's honesty, candor, and advice based on experience and the Word of God in this collection of devotional readings perfect for the pressures of today's world.\n","meta":{"redpajama_set_name":"RedPajamaBook"}}
+{"text":"\n\nCopyright \u00a9 1997, 2003, 2011, 2017 by Sue Muller Hacking\n\nAll rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced or utilized in any form, or by any electronic, mechanical, or other means, without the prior written permission of the publisher.\n\nPublished by Sasquatch Books\n\nEditor: Gary Luke\n\nProduction editor: Em Gale\n\nCover design: Mikko Kim\n\nInterior design: Bryce de Flamand\n\nCover photograph: Tere Sue Gidlof\n\nMaps: Lisa Brower\n\nCopyeditor: Janice Lee\n\nLibrary of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is available.\n\nISBN: 9781632170903\n\nEbook ISBN 9781632170910\n\nSasquatch Books\n\n1904 Third Avenue, Suite 710\n\nSeattle, WA 98101\n\n(206) 467-4300\n\nwww.sasquatchbooks.com\n\ncustserv@sasquatchbooks.com\n\n**_Photo Credits_**\n\nJason Costanza, https:\/\/flic.kr\/\u200bp\/\u200be5EMx6, CC BY 2.0, converted to gray-scale: ; Tobin Fitzthum for ThurstonTalk.com: ; Amanda Hacking:  and ; Laura Jean Miller: ; Mike Miller: ; Eric Willhite: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , and\n\nAll other photos courtesy of the author.\n\nv4.1\n**_To Chip and Angela for embracing the Vagabond Walkers_**\n\n# **CONTENTS**\n\nCover\n\nTitle Page\n\nCopyright\n\nDedication\n\nWalks at a Glance\n\nIntroduction\n\nA Guide to This Book\n\n**EVERETT**\n\n**SEATTLE**\n\n**EASTSIDE**\n\n**Bellevue, Redmond, and Issaquah**\n\n**SOUTH KING COUNTY**\n\n**Renton, Kent, and Des Moines**\n\n**TACOMA**\n\n**OLYMPIA**\n\nAcknowledgments\n\nAbout the Author\n\n# **WALKS AT A GLANCE**\n\nn\/a | Information not available, particularly concerning acreage of land surrounding converted railway trails  \n---|---  \nADA Trail* | Sometimes only one trail or segments of a trail will be ADA compliant  \n** | May or may not be permitted on all trails  \nOL | Off-leash area in, or connected to, park\/trail  \nBeaches*** | These are checked only for walks that allow wading\/swimming access to a lake or Puget Sound\n\n# **INTRODUCTION**\n\nWalking has always been my favorite way to exercise. Being outdoors, even on cloudy Northwest days, refreshes my soul, clears my mind, and lets me feel truly alive. When my family was younger, taking a walk often meant going to the mountains for long day hikes or squeezing in a short stroll in a park between family errands. Now that my time is freer, I love to walk for health and exercise, and as a way to catch up with friends or family. But I don't want just any walk\u2014I want cathedral-like forests, open meadows, tranquil ponds, mountain and water views, birds and other wildlife. And I have found\u2014nestled in the seemingly endless urban bustle from Everett to Seattle and Olympia, and east to Issaquah and Bellevue\u2014more than a hundred small sanctuaries of nature just a few minutes from home. What glorious freedom, if only for an hour or two, to step from the car and immerse oneself in the gentle pace of foot travel.\n\n## **_How These Walks Were Chosen_**\n\nThese 120 walks lie along the shores of Puget Sound and the lowland forests and meadows beneath the Cascade Foothills. They are accessible year-round and mostly child- and dog-friendly, and the majority are easy, short walks just minutes from your home or workplace, be it in Olympia, Seattle, Everett, Issaquah, or any of the cities in between.\n\nIncreased traffic congestion over the past 20 years has challenged our goal of offering walk choices within 30 minutes' drive of the urban centers, but many new greenbelt trails and parks have been created, resulting in an ever-increasing number of trail options.\n\nMy criteria for a good walking trail are that it be at least a mile in length, be surrounded by greenery or close to water, and allow no motorized vehicles. Most trails in this book meet that one-mile minimum, and others are part of a larger system of trails within a park where you are limited only by your energy and time. A few small parks, such as Tumwater Falls, Hazel Wolf Wetlands Preserve, and Seattle's Schmitz Preserve may fall a bit short on trail length but equal others in beauty. All walks are on public land, with the exception of Tumwater Falls and Narbeck Wetlands Sanctuary, which are open to the public daily. All the trails in this book are free for walking, although those on state and Department of Natural Resources (DNR) land require vehicles to have a Discover Pass.\n\nMost important is that every walk travels through natural places\u2014everything from lakeshores and saltwater beaches to meadows and forests.\n\n## **_Keeping Updated_**\n\nSince the third edition of this book, maintenance crews and trail volunteers have paved old trails and created new ones. Landslides and floods have closed or diverted others. More railroad right-of-ways have been and are being acquired and converted to trails, and new nature preserves now add green spaces to the local maps. I've tried to stay up to date with changes and improvements, but nature and politics rule. Because of this constant growth and change, things may not be as I have portrayed them by the time you take some of these walks. You should always visit park websites and stay informed about any closures before making the trek. With luck, the changes will be for the better. How lucky we are to live in a place where the number of parks, trails, and walks has increased over the years!\n\n## **_What about Regional and Sidewalk Trails?_**\n\nThe Puget Sound region is crisscrossed with many long regional trails, which are usually converted from abandoned railway lines and are extremely popular with bicyclers. Some of these regional trails have always been included in this book: the very popular Burke-Gilman and its extension, the Sammamish River Trail, for example. Others, such as the Centennial Trail and the Chehalis Western Trail, made the cut because, though they are long, they include many short stretches that appeal to walkers.\n\nTo keep this book true to its goal of nearby walks, we've eliminated regional trails that are too far afield, such as the Snoqualmie Valley and Preston-Snoqualmie Trails, and others that are just not natural enough, such as the East Lake Sammamish and Interurban Trails.\n\nPopular urban walks such as Everett's North View and South View Parks; Seattle's Alki Beach Trail, Lake Washington Boulevard, and Myrtle Edwards Park; Tacoma's Wright Park and Ruston Way; and Olympia's Capitol Lake don't meet our definition of walks in natural places. But they are wonderful places to walk: some of them right alongside the Sound with the scent of sea air, the call of gulls, and views out over the water. An Internet search will direct you to the nearest trailhead or park address.\n\n## **_Thoughts on Safety_**\n\nNot every trail is as safe as a suburban sidewalk. Despite maintenance efforts, mudslides obliterate paths, rain erodes them, and fallen trees block them. Walking in natural places can be risky. Wear appropriate footgear and try to walk with someone else, especially in the more remote parks. Be aware that wildlife, such as coyotes and bears, are occasionally seen on some of the trails that connect by greenbelts to the foothills. For their safety, keep dogs on leashes. Take common sense, a cell phone, and anything else you need. You're on your own.\n\n## **_Trails and Parks Belong to Everyone_**\n\nI've had people beg me, on hearing that I was writing this book, not to reveal \"their\" special trail or park. One hiker told me, \"We don't want a lot of folks overrunning the trails, picking the flowers, and not picking up after their dogs.\" No one wants that, whether they come from nearby or afar. But the more users a park has and the better it's known, the more likely that it will be protected and cared for.\n\nMy experience is that most people who share the trails respect the natural areas and understand the need for preservation and care. When parents feel that way, they encourage the same feelings in their children. There is no \"my park\" or \"your park.\" These are all our parks.\n\nWhether parks are signposted or not, the same minimal courtesies are asked of all visitors:\n\n**1.** Stay on the trail. As one sign in a Bellevue park says, \"Plants grow by the inch, and die by the foot.\"\n\n**2.** Keep pets on a leash unless in a designated off-leash area. Always clean up after your dog.\n\n**3.** Keep children and pets out of salmon-spawning creeks.\n\n**4.** Don't feed the waterfowl, squirrels, or other wildlife.\n\n**5.** Don't pick the flowers or forage for mushrooms.\n\n**6.** Take only memories and pictures. Leave only footprints.\n\nWith everyone's cooperation, we can preserve our trails for ourselves and as a heritage for generations to come.\n\n## **_Consider Volunteering_**\n\nEvery weekend, year-round, hundreds of volunteers work on the trails and parks we love. They clear fallen branches, repair drainage, restore the natural habitat, and build new trails. Others volunteer as docents or citizen patrols to inform and aid other walkers. Without volunteers, our region's parks, wetlands, shorelines, and trails would not be what they are today.\n\nWhy volunteer? It's healthy, fun, and outdoorsy. It's companionable and educational, and it builds teamwork. It's great for the economy and helps the environment!\n\nLearning about park and trail volunteer opportunities is as easy as clicking on your city or county website, or asking at your favorite park office. Even the State of Washington needs volunteers for its parks and public lands. Private organizations include the very active Washington Trails Association and Issaquah Alps Trails Club. There is so much that needs doing!\n\n# **A GUIDE TO THIS BOOK**\n\nThese 120 walks are arranged roughly from north to south, grouped in chapters according to six urban hubs: Everett, Seattle (including Mercer Island and Bainbridge Island), the Eastside (including Bellevue, Redmond, and Issaquah), South King County (including Des Moines, Renton, and Kent), Tacoma (including southern Vashon Island), and Olympia.\n\nEach chapter begins with a locator map and a list of walks so you can easily choose where to go.\n\nEach walk begins with a brief location description that places the walk very generally in reference to an urban center. Distances given are in driving miles (not as the crow flies) from an approximation of the city's downtown area.\n\nThen follows a brief description line that includes the size of the park or trail area, the setting, and special attractions of the walk.\n\nThe address provided is the street location of the park or trailhead, not a mailing address. You may be able to use this address for an Internet map search. If a park doesn't have a specific street address, we have stated that the one provided is approximate.\n\nA summary of the walk follows, with these headings:\n\n**TRAIL** | **Approximate length in miles; type of surface (boardwalk, gravel, natural surface, or paved)**.  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level (flat or nearly so), gentle (easy ups and downs), moderate (gets the heart rate up), or steep (stairs or equivalent steepness)**.  \n**OTHER USES** | **Who shares the trail with you, the pedestrian. This might be bicycles or horses. Although not explicitly noted, expect to share paved trails with skaters. None of these walks allow motorized vehicles (with the exception of park maintenance vehicles)**.  \n**DOGS** | **Three possibilities\u2014on leash, not allowed, or off leash. (Designated off-leash areas may or may not include the trail.) Dog-friendly areas may be restricted.**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Other trails (both included in this guide and not) that intersect the walk.**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms (including freestanding facilities), interpretive walks, picnic tables, playgrounds, playing fields, et cetera. (Refer to maps and driving directions for parking information.)**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) access, for the trail and\/or park. (Call the listed office for details; their definition of \"accessible\" and yours may differ.) Some trails are barrier-free but don't meet ADA requirements.**\n\nA walk may have more than one setting, characterized by the following icons:\n\n**FOREST.....................** |     \n---|---  \n**RIVER\/STREAM...........** |     \n**LAKE\/WETLAND.........** |     \n**MEADOW\/FARMLAND..** |     \n**NATURE PRESERVE....** |     \n**PUGET SOUND...........** |     \n**MOUNTAIN VIEWS.......** |\n\n**WALK DESCRIPTIONS:** May include ecological, historical, and scenic information. They are not intended to be step-by-step trail guides; the goal is to entice and invite you to discover the pleasure of the walk on your own.\n\n**GETTING THERE:** Driving directions in this book are basic and brief, and start from either the closest downtown or major freeway; they will be of little help if you take a wrong turn. There may be public transport available to the trailhead or park. Most parks and trails are open daylight hours only, but some urban parks stay open later. Check park websites for seasonal hours.\n\n**CONTACT:** Contact numbers may be for the individual park's office or a central parks department office. If there is an opportunity to volunteer at this park, it may be noted here.\n\n**MAPS:** The map shown for each walk is intended to give a general sense of the layout of the park and trail. Do not rely on these to locate yourself in complex parks such as Cougar Mountain, Lord Hill, Paradise Valley, Soaring Eagle, and others with extensive trail systems. We have tried to show the major trails within each park, but there may be secondary paths that are not shown. Please follow guidelines and signs when walking as there may be problems with erosion and other hazards.\n\nMap orientation is with north up, and the scale is approximate. The difference between paved, gravel, and natural surface trails is not indicated due to constantly changing conditions.\n\n**_Map Legend_**\n\n# **EVERETT**\n\n**1** Jennings Memorial and Nature Parks\n\n**2** Jetty Island\n\n**3** Langus Riverfront Park\n\n**4** Spencer Island\n\n**5** Centennial Trail\n\n**6** Narbeck Wetland Sanctuary\n\n**7** Howarth Park\n\n**8** Forest Park\n\n**9** Lowell Riverfront Trail\n\n**10** Meadowdale Beach Park\n\n**11** Southwest County Olympic View Park\n\n**12** Yost Park\n\n**13** Lynndale Park\n\n**14** Terrace Creek Park\n\n**15** North Creek Park\n\n**16** Bob Heirman Wildlife Preserve\n\n**17** Lord Hill Regional Park\n\n**18** Paradise Valley Conservation Area\n\n## **1 JENNINGS MEMORIAL AND NATURE PARKS**\n\n**Marysville, 7.5 miles north of Everett**\n\n**_Explore 61 acres of meadow, forest, and wetland in these twin parks_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1.5 miles; paved, natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Picnic area, restrooms, playground, demonstration garden, interpretive signs, fishing pond, ball fields, historical displays and museum**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Restrooms, garden**\n\nStroll the undulating hills of these two parks from passive forest and meadows to an active park with ball fields, a children's fishing pond, playgrounds, and a Master Gardener demonstration garden. In the wetlands, cattails make homes for marsh wrens and red-winged blackbirds. Raptors overhead reveal the presence of the tiny, secretive voles and mice that seek shelter in the grasses.\n\nThese twin parks are so closely aligned it's hard to know when you walk from one to the other. The Armar Road entrance is for the Memorial Park, and here you'll find the city parks office, where you can stop in for more information. History buffs will be intrigued by the 1901 steam donkey engine on display and enjoy a visit to the Marysville Historical Society museum.\n\nA half-mile paved path leads from one park to the other and around the fishing pond. After that the trails are natural surface through the western red cedars and into the meadows and the wetland. Boardwalks and bridges allow you to navigate over the sensitive wetlands and next to softly flowing Allen Creek, which bisects the parks.\n\nThe themed demonstration garden invites you to experience an English cottage garden and a meditation garden. You can learn techniques for growing your own flowers, fruit trees, vegetables, and herbs. In summer the park rings with the sounds of children, and you'll find classes, movies, and fishing derbies, but the wetlands and sensitive natural areas will still beckon dedicated walkers.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 6915 Armar Road, Marysville\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5 southbound, take exit 199 (WA 528). Drive east on WA 528 for 0.7 miles. Turn left on 47th Avenue NE. Continue 0.5 miles, bearing right at the fork onto Arlington-Marysville Road\/Armar Road. The park entrance is on the right.\n\n**CONTACT:** Marysville Parks and Recreation Department, (360) 363-8400, www.marysvillewa.gov\n\n## **2 JETTY ISLAND**\n\n**1.5 miles northwest of downtown Everett**\n\n**_Walk and bird-watch in these 200 acres of salt marshes, beaches, and sand dunes along Port Gardner Bay_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **2 to 4 miles, depending on tide; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **Not allowed**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Open summer only; free ferry mid-July to Labor Day; restrooms, boating, picnic tables, classes, guided interpretive walks**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **None**\n\nBuilt almost a hundred years ago at the mouth of the Snohomish River to create a freshwater harbor in Puget Sound, this man-made island has succeeded in ways its creators probably never imagined. A southerly breeze cools the western shore, carrying the scent of seaweed and the barks of California sea lions. Sandpipers sprint on the mudflats; ospreys soar above. Around the Scotch broom, swallows dart and dive for their insect meals. Near the shore, crabs scurry for shelter under rocks. In the salt marsh, salt crystals glisten on the stems of the pickleweed.\n\nMeasuring 2 miles long and 0.5 miles wide, this wildlife preserve just 3 minutes from the Everett marina is the city's summer pride. For 7 or 8 weeks each summer, Wednesday through Sunday, the eighty-passenger ferry run by the Mosquito Fleet fills to capacity to take families, walkers, and bird lovers across the Snohomish River channel to the dock on Jetty Island. From there they disperse, though the majority cluster around the picnic tables on the western shore. To find solitude, walk either north or south for 3 or 4 minutes. You'll think you're on a deserted island\u2014just you and the terns, herons, swallows, and shimmering, slippery, pungent sea lettuce that lines the beach.\n\nAt low tide you can circumnavigate the island on the mudflats, though you have to be willing to get your feet squishy with mud. On the western side, a berm built by the Army Corps of Engineers has created a new salt marsh. Here you are likely to see many of the more than forty species of birds that visit or nest on the island. In early summer, expect to be dive-bombed by protective mother gulls warning you away from their nests.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 10th Street Boat Launch, Everett\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From downtown Everett, follow Everett Avenue west to W Marine View Drive. Turn right (north) and go 1.75 miles. Turn left (west) at 10th Street into 10th Street Boat Launch and Marine Park.\n\nParking fee is $3 on Friday and weekends. Ferry reservations can be made by Everett residents or groups of over eight people 48 hours in advance. Call (425) 257-8304. Other visitors can ride the ferry on a first-come, first-served basis.\n\n**CONTACT:** Everett Parks and Recreation Department, (425) 257-8300, www.everettwa.org\/\u200bparks\n\n**What Is That?**\n\n**Find out by joining a naturalist-led walk. Most are free. Call your city or county parks department for information. Parks also offer classes in outdoor-related topics such as gardening, birding, geology, animal care, naturalist studies, and science. Fees may vary**.\n\n## **3 LANGUS RIVERFRONT PARK**\n\n**6 miles east of downtown Everett**\n\n**_Cascade views and bird-watching abound along these 96 acres of the Snohomish River and Union Slough_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **3.6-mile loop; gravel, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Spencer Island (Walk #4; no bicycles or pets allowed)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic tables**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Trail, restrooms, picnic area**\n\nOld barges docked forever against the bank of the smooth-flowing Snohomish River recall days gone by when rivers and lakes, not roads, united the Northwest. Well-tended lawns and a paved walkway seem so genteel compared to the stalwart pilings of old docks. Great blue herons and belted kingfishers feed from the river\u2014one on foot, the other on wing\u2014and migrating waterfowl rest in the reeds along the shore.\n\nEnjoy Langus Riverfront Park with a civilized promenade along the riverfront, a hefty mile out and back, from the northern end\u2014or with a 3-mile triangular loop walk along the Snohomish River and Union Slough. For the longer loop, continue south after the pavement ends, passing under the imposing I-5 freeway bridge. The first stretch follows the river, where fishing boats, tugs, tourist boats, and an occasional log boom float by. At the southernmost spot, Picnic Point, views open to grasslands, the Cascades, and on clear days, Mount Rainier.\n\nFrom Picnic Point the trail heads north along Union Slough, where a variety of deciduous trees line the pathway on a dike above the tidal trough. Across the water (if it's high tide) or mud (if it's low tide) lie the marshes, ponds, and dikes of Spencer Island, a nature preserve (Walk #4). Jackknife Bridge ahead spans Union Slough, serving as an entrance to the preserve. From the bridge, you can retrace your route to stay on the paved trail, or complete the loop by walking west on the gravel maintenance road (4th Street SE) back to the river. Along the road you walk between waste treatment ponds, where waterfowl abound. With binoculars you can see a palette of colors: the distinct black-and-white plumage of the hooded merganser, the orange bill of the scoter, or the blue bill of the male ruddy duck in late spring.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 400 Smith Island Road, Everett\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5 southbound, take exit 198 (WA 529 S\/WA 99). Go south on WA 529 and turn right onto 34th Avenue NE\/Frontage Road. Follow the road left under WA 99, then stay right for Smith Island Road, which leads to Langus Riverfront Park.\n\nFrom I-5 northbound, take exit 195 (E Marine View Drive). Continue on E Marine View Drive. Turn right on WA 529\/WA 99 N. After crossing the Snohomish River, turn right on Smith Island Road and follow it to the park.\n\n**CONTACT:** Everett Parks and Recreation Department, (425) 257-8300, www.everettwa.org\/\u200bparks\n\n## **4 SPENCER ISLAND**\n\n**6.5 miles east of downtown Everett**\n\n**_Union and Steamboat Sloughs surround these 415 acres of bird-watchers' wetland paradise_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **4 miles; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only; hunters from mid-October to mid-January on the north end; no pets**  \n**DOGS** | **Not allowed**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Langus Riverfront Park (Walk #3)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, interpretive signs, bike rack near footbridge**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **None**\n\nSpencer Island is a birder's paradise and a frequent destination for National Audubon Society field trips. On bright days the ruddy ducks and American wigeons appear to be floating on top of their upside-down twins as they paddle across the mirrorlike surface of the pond. Northern harriers and red-tailed hawks hunt overhead. In the still waters by the marsh grasses, you might see river otters flipping and diving for fish. Nesting boxes for wood ducks and swallows dot numerous islets in the marsh, and on the southern loop bat boxes make welcome homes for these flying mammals.\n\nBut even without binoculars and a passion for birds, the miles of trail along dikes above the estuary are inviting for their hours of strolling and gazing at the scenery. After entering the preserve over Jackknife Bridge, turn either north or south on the wide wood chip\u2013lined paths. On clear days, Mount Pilchuck dominates the skyline to the east, and to the north, Mount Baker may stand, white and craggy.\n\nEarly settlers created dikes and sloughs to remove the tidal influx of salt water and to protect their farmlands. When Washington State, Snohomish County, and the City of Everett joined forces in the early 1990s to return this area to its natural state, they breached the dike wall with culverts and bridges. Now the wetland is an estuary again, responding to the ebb and flow of the tides from Puget Sound. This combination of salt water and freshwater from the Snohomish River provides a habitat for hundreds of species of birds and mammals.\n\nFrom mid-October to mid-January the northern trails (administered by the state Department of Fish and Wildlife and signposted) are open to hunting, so most walkers go south during those months. Interpretive signs provide information on the area's history and its natural history. Benches and viewing platforms add a human touch to this otherwise wild and beautiful estuary.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 4th Street SE, Everett (east end)\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5 southbound, take exit 198 (WA 529 S\/WA 99). Go south on WA 529, and turn right onto 34th Avenue NE\/Frontage Road. Follow the road left under WA 99, then stay right for Smith Island Road. Turn left on 4th Street SE (gravel road). Parking is on the right in a few hundred yards. Walk east on 4th Street SE to Jackknife Bridge, which leads to Spencer Island.\n\nFrom I-5 northbound, take exit 195 (E Marine View Drive). Continue on E Marine View Drive. Turn right on WA 529\/WA 99 N. After crossing the Snohomish River, turn right on Smith Island Road and proceed as above.\n\n**CONTACT:** Snohomish County Parks and Recreation Department, (425) 388-6600, www.snohomishcountywa.gov\/\u200bparks\n\n## **5 CENTENNIAL TRAIL**\n\n**8 miles southeast of Everett (Snohomish Trailhead) or 8 miles east of Everett (Machias Trailhead)**\n\n**_Walk portions of this 30-mile trail along the Pilchuck River for Cascade views in pastoral Snohomish Valley_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **30 miles one way; paved rails-to-trails conversion**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles; horses on separate equestrian trail**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic tables**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Trail access, restrooms at Pilchuck and Machias Trailheads**\n\nJust minutes east of the I-5 corridor lies the fertile Snohomish Valley with its pastures, dairy farms, and picturesque barns. You've probably driven through it countless times en route to the Cascades or Eastern Washington. Now, the Centennial Trail lets you slow the pace and walk this valley, breathing the clear, fresh air (and, yes, sometimes the aroma of cows). Views are expansive, from the dairy-farm pastures to the peaks of the Cascades.\n\nLike other paved converted railroad grades, this trail is great for distance walking, stroller pushing, or bicycling. There are twelve trailheads, so you can choose to walk either north or south.\n\nFrom historic downtown Snohomish, the trail parallels Maple Avenue and the Pilchuck River. Soon, vistas open to embrace the pastures and farms. In the 1880s settlers cleared trees and drained the swampy land to leave rich, fertile soil. Now, as then, it is prime dairy land. Cows and horses graze in the lush fields.\n\nIn the small town of Machias, a replica of the old railroad station now serves as a rest area and rental facility. Near the trail's midpoint, on the outskirts of Lake Stevens, you'll cross several country roads and driveways, so be sure to keep kids in close check. The trail continues to ever more rural areas as it approaches Arlington.\n\n**ADDRESS:** _Snohomish Trailhead:_ 402 2nd Street, Snohomish; _Pilchuck Trailhead:_ 5801 S Machias Road, Snohomish; _Machias Trailhead:_ 1624 Virginia Street, Machias; _Lake Stevens\/20th Street NE Trailhead:_ 13205 20th Street NE, Lake Stevens. For details about eight other trailheads to the north, visit www.centennialtrail.com.\n\n**GETTING THERE:** _Snohomish Trailhead:_ From I-5 take exit 194 onto US 2. Head east on US 2 for about 8 miles. In Snohomish, exit US 2 at 88th Street SE. At the first light turn right onto Pine Avenue and follow Pine to the intersection with Maple Avenue for limited parking.\n\n_Pilchuck Trailhead:_ Proceed as above, continuing on Maple Avenue through Snohomish. Maple becomes S Machias Road. The trailhead is in about 2 miles on the right.\n\n_Machias Trailhead:_ Proceed as above, to the stop sign past the Pilchuck Trailhead. Turn right and follow S Machias Road to the old fire station. Turn left onto Division Street and go 2 blocks to the trailhead on the right.\n\n_Lake Stevens\/20th Street NE Trailhead:_ From I-5 take exit 194 onto US 2. Head east on US 2 and exit left onto WA 204. Go north 2.7 miles, following signs to Lake Stevens. Turn left onto WA 9. Go 1.7 miles, then turn right onto WA 92 (Granite Falls Highway). After 2.8 miles turn right onto N Machias Road. The trailhead is in 1 mile on the right with parking for a hundred cars.\n\n**CONTACT:** Snohomish County Parks and Recreation Department, (425) 388-6600, www.snohomishcountywa.gov\/\u200bparks\n\n## **6 NARBECK WETLAND SANCTUARY**\n\n**7 miles southwest of downtown Everett**\n\n**_Walk a wetland trail and see wildlife flourish in this 50-acre man-made sanctuary_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1.3 miles; natural surface, boardwalk, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restroom, picnic tables, interpretive trail**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Restrooms, paved trail; some sections of gravel trail**\n\nSpring and summer are the prime times to visit a Northwest wetland, when the new green shoots are coming up, goslings and ducklings abound, and the blackbirds return to sing in the cattails. But year-round, a small wetland such as Narbeck offers level walking, a glimpse of life in a beaver pond, and the poetic shape of deciduous branches against a blue sky.\n\nNarbeck is the story of success in wetland mitigation banking, a process whereby a new wetland is created in advance of destroying another. When Boeing needed to expand its facilities, it worked with federal and state governments to create a large man-made wetland that serves to control flooding and provide habitat for wildlife, and is specifically created to offset any future wetland destruction in the area.\n\nOver a 7-year timeline, the land was transformed. Earth berms were constructed to retain water in the ponds created by Narbeck Creek, and hundreds of native plants were restored to the area. Today, Narbeck is a sanctuary for many animals, including ring-necked ducks, mallards, rabbits, raptors, crows, and songbirds. An interpretive trail invites strolling and reading, or you can sit in the cave-like wildlife blind and watch for beaver and bird action on the pond.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 7007 Seaway Boulevard, Everett\n\n**GETTING THERE:** I-5 northbound, take exit 189 (WA 527). Immediately follow signs to WA 526\/Mukilteo. Go west on WA 526 for 2.9 miles, then turn right on Seaway Boulevard. Stay in the middle lane to avoid being swept into Boeing. After the light at 75th Street SW, go 0.25 miles to the park entrance on the right.\n\n**CONTACT:** Snohomish County Parks and Recreation Department, (425) 388-6600, www.snohomishcountywa.gov\/\u200bparks. To volunteer, contact Friends of Narbeck Wetland Sanctuary at 425-388-5108 or visit www.narbeck.org.\n\n## **7 HOWARTH PARK**\n\n**2 miles southwest of downtown Everett**\n\n**_This 28-acre tri-level park offers views, play areas, and a forested ravine leading to beaches and an off-leash area on Possession Sound_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1 mile round trip; boardwalk, natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash on trails; designated off-leash area on beach**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, bridge over railroad tracks, picnic and barbecue area, playground, tennis courts**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Restrooms**\n\nBeachcomb, swim, or cavort with your dog\u2014free of its leash!\u2014while harbor seals frolic in the waters of Possession Sound and drift logs entice children to clamber. Howarth Park offers one of the few beach-access trails in the city of Everett. Nestled almost secretly behind suburban lawns and homes, this community park welcomes forest walkers, beach explorers, or just casual strollers.\n\nNear the tennis courts at the western end of the park you'll find restrooms, picnic areas, and a playground. Dropping steeply from the lawn to the ravine below, a staircase trail ends at a boardwalk, which meanders above a stream. Following this trail does not lead to the beach, however, but to a T-junction with a narrow, steep trail bordering the railroad tracks. In dry weather, you can ascend the natural-surface path back to the playground and parking or return along the ravine walk. Unauthorized trails lead onto the railroad tracks, but crossing is illegal and, given the frequent passage of trains, extremely dangerous.\n\nTo reach the beach safely, either walk or drive to the eastern end of the park. From the eastern parking area you'll find a trail that follows Pigeon Creek in a young scrub forest, and another that traverses a small wetland, then climbs to a pedestrian overpass above the railroad tracks. This is a favorite place to stand when the train whistle shrills and the locomotive and cars rumble beneath you. At the beach end is a lookout tower with panoramic views of Port Gardner Bay and the navy ships. Just north of the tower is the off-leash area, where dogs are free to romp in the sand and salt water or play tag with their human companions among the drift logs and boulders. A short walk south takes you to the public beach.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 1127 Olympic Boulevard, Everett\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 192 (41st Street\/Broadway\/Naval Station). Turn right (if southbound) or left (if northbound) on 41st Street and continue through two traffic lights. The road turns up a hillside and becomes Mukilteo Boulevard. Go west on Mukilteo Boulevard past the traffic light at Dogwood Drive and around the first curve of the road after the intersection. Just after the intersection with Seahurst Avenue, enter the park by turning right on Olympic Boulevard.\n\n**CONTACT:** Everett Parks and Recreation Department, (425) 257-8300, www.everettwa.org\/\u200bparks\n\n## **8 FOREST PARK**\n\n**1 mile south of downtown Everett**\n\n**_Leave the playgrounds and petting farm behind, and explore the quiet forest in this 190-acre city park_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1.5 miles; natural surface, paved utility road**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Moderate to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, animal farm, picnic shelters, playground, pool, sports fields, water playground**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Restrooms, animal farm, picnic shelters, pool**\n\nWhen you've hauled the kids off the massive playground (which is fully fenced to keep them from wandering into the steep forest), look for the wooden gate and trailhead between Cedar Hall and the picnic shelter. Here, in the largest of Everett's city parks, forest tranquility beckons. Wide, wood-chipped paths lined with logs welcome you into the big-leaf maple and cedar forest on the ridge above a deep ravine. Look for old snags decorated with fungus and old-growth stumps with springboard notches still visible, like eyes peering out from the sometimes-charred wood. You can stroll the ridge awhile, then rest on a bench overlooking the fern-filled ravine and out to the sunny baseball diamond beyond. Though the forest looks wild, an occasional rhododendron bush and a proliferation of English ivy tell of a more cultivated past when the park housed a full-fledged zoo.\n\nFor a gentle stroll, follow the contoured trails that wind through open forest to the old utility road to the west. If you want heart-pumping exercise, head east on the staircase trails that lead down to the east entrance road and back up again. Next to a lawn, the road, lined with rock walls\u2014and, in summer, the bright colors of foxglove in bloom\u2014makes its way toward Mukilteo Boulevard. You can climb back to the main park grounds through the forest or on the ridges on either side of the ravine. If you choose the ridge west of the utility road, you'll find the fern- and cedar-filled forest. Just below the playground fence are open cedar groves, perfect for warm-weather picnics. Be sure to pack out all that you pack in, as there are no trash receptacles on the trails.\n\nAnother forest walk begins at the end of Pigeon Creek Road (just across Mukilteo Boulevard from the west entrance). Drive about 0.5 miles north to the parking lot by the railroad tracks. There is no beach access, and crossing the tracks is prohibited. The wooded trail that begins here climbs the hill toward a reservoir in about 0.5 miles. Eagles nest high in the branches of the 80-year-old fir trees.\n\nFor those with kids, don't miss the animal farm and a chance to pet, and maybe feed, the resident rabbits, ducks, pigs, goats, ponies, and llamas. The farm is open late spring through September.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 802 Mukilteo Boulevard, Everett\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 192 (Broadway\/41st Street). Follow signs for 41st Street W. After crossing WA 99 (Evergreen Way), follow 41st Street uphill as it becomes Mukilteo E Boulevard. The park is on the left in about 1 mile.\n\n**CONTACT:** Everett Parks and Recreation Department, (425) 257-8300, www.everettwa.org\/\u200bparks\n\n## **9 LOWELL RIVERFRONT TRAIL**\n\n**2.5 miles southeast of downtown Everett**\n\n**_Walk a 3-mile loop along the Snohomish River, where wetlands and meadows give views of birds and the Cascades_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **3-mile loop; paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash; short connecting walk to Lowell Park off-leash area**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Lowell Park off-leash area on S 3rd Avenue, west of railway line (use overpass)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic tables, viewpoint**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Trail, restrooms**\n\nThis strip of manicured trail on the banks of the Snohomish River offers intimate river-edge walking and dramatic views of the Cascades. A late-afternoon visit reveals the Cascades set in bright relief to the east and a sheen of slate blue and mauve on the glassy Snohomish River. In contrast to the manicured park, the river is lined with old tumbledown shacks and craggy remains of piers. Pilings bound by cable still stand, resisting the unrelenting push of the water.\n\nA bustling private industrial site for the past century, this area is now being restored to its natural state of meadow and wetland. From the parking lot, head either north or south. The walk to the south is more sylvan, with cottonwoods, alders, and blackberry thickets by the river. Across the water a barn, now softened by weathering, winds, and climbing vines, squats on its old foundation. It was here that E. D. Smith ran a sawmill and a logging camp, with a store, post office, and blacksmith shop, from the 1860s to the 1880s. For decades, the river was active with boats and log barges making their way to the Everett mills.\n\nIf you walk north from the parking lot, you'll find a more parklike setting, with lawns, benches, and picnic tables. When the trail turns west into a sandy meadow, you can loop back to the parking lot on one of the myriad access roads or return on the pavement by the river's edge, completing a 3-mile walk.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 3084 Lowell Snohomish River Road\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 192 (Broadway\/41st Street). Follow signs for 41st Street W. Turn right onto S 3rd Avenue, which becomes Junction Avenue. Continue onto 2nd Avenue, then in 0.5 miles turn left onto Lenora Street. Continue onto Lowell Snohomish River Road to the parking area.\n\n**CONTACT:** Everett Parks and Recreation Department, (425) 257-8300, www.everettwa.org\/\u200bparks\n\n## **10 MEADOWDALE BEACH PARK**\n\n**Lynnwood, 14.5 miles southwest of Everett**\n\n**_Follow Lund's Gulch Creek through forest to reach a Puget Sound beach in this 108-acre park_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **2.5 miles round-trip; natural surface, paved (in lower meadow)**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Moderate to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic tables**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved trail, restrooms, picnic area\u2014call (206) 339-1208 to request disabled parking pass for beach and picnic area**\n\nA gracefully curved descent on a wide graveled trail brings you into the aromatic forest. By keeping your eyes low on the huge bases of the Douglas fir and cedar stumps, you can envision these giants as they were a hundred years ago, before they were cut for the mills. Robins and rufous-sided towhees hop slowly from the trail.\n\nThis upland-to-beach park was created with walkers in mind. Although the beach is accessible by car for those who need to drive, the layout forces all others to take the 1.25-mile walk from the upper parking lot to the beach. Allow walking time (about 30 minutes) to return to the parking lot from the beach in daylight.\n\nCredit 8\n\nSmall mileposts help you keep track of the distance traveled. At 0.5 miles a washout shows the power of water and the need to preserve soil-retaining plants on steep hillsides. Beside the trail, Lund's Gulch Creek cuts a swath in the forest and whispers its wet sounds on its way to Puget Sound. At the footbridge, you can choose to cross to the picnic area, lawns, and lower parking lot or continue straight, still in the woods, to arrive at the tunnel to the beach. You may hear a train whistle blow, then watch a long freight chug past on the tracks that separate the forest from the sand.\n\nTo reach the water, pass beneath the tracks through the echo-filled tunnel. After the narrow ravine, the view feels exceptionally expansive. The snowy, hazy forms of the Olympics rise in the west, ferries from Mukilteo and Edmonds ply the Sound, and at low tide the beach beckons you to explore its rippled sand.\n\nIf the beach is your goal, call ahead to learn the status of the sometimes impassable tunnel to the shore.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 6026 156th Street SW, Edmonds; disabled access (call ahead for gate PIN): 15433 75th Place W, Edmonds\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 183 (164th Street SW). Travel west on 164th Street SW and go 1.7 miles to the intersection of 168th Street SW and WA 99. Cross WA 99 and continue west for 2 blocks. Turn right on 52nd Avenue W. Turn left on 160th Street SW, then right onto 56th Avenue W. Turn left onto 156th Street SW and continue until you reach the park entrance at the end of the road.\n\n**CONTACT:** Snohomish County Parks and Recreation Department, (425) 388-6600, www.snohomishcountywa.gov\/\u200bparks\n\n**Bring a Bucket and Shovel**\n\n**Many Puget Sound beaches are open for clamming. Some are seasonally closed; others are permanently closed due to pollution or natural marine toxins. For information, call the individual park or the Washington State Marine Biotoxin Hotline at (800) 562-5632**.\n\n## **11 SOUTHWEST COUNTY OLYMPIC VIEW PARK**\n\n**Edmonds, 16 miles south of Everett**\n\n**_Inviting trails meander through 120 acres of mature forest that border Perrinville Creek as it flows to Browns Bay on Puget Sound_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1 mile total; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Interpretive trail**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **None**\n\nImmerse yourself in the natural sounds of bickering squirrels and cheerful birdsong just minutes from the Edmonds\u2013Kingston ferry and the I-5 corridor. This park (known as Olympic View Park because of its location, not for views!) is the largest tract of forest within Edmonds city limits and a haven for wildlife, and with a mile of trail, it is an inviting respite from the bustle of traffic and commerce. While touted to have two nature trails, at present only the walk to the south of Olympic View Drive is fully developed as an interpretive trail. For those with little time or a desire for an easy, wide trail, the south side is where you'll find a mini-arboretum with trees bearing Latin and local names, benches for resting weary feet, and an easy gradient for walking.\n\nCredit 9\n\nAcross the road, to the north, the park is less developed but entices with steeper hills and numerous less-defined neighborhood trails. Here you can wander among remnants of old-growth forest where five-foot-wide stumps now nurture young saplings, and small trails lead to children's forts and rope swings. For a good workout, head down the hill to the west and back up, but be careful with your footing!\n\nLike most of the land bordering Puget Sound, this parcel was logged more than a hundred years ago, and evidence of the old-growth forest remains today in the form of springboard notches cut in the sides of huge stumps. These 120 acres were later donated to the University of Washington, and when the land was transferred to Snohomish County in 1971, it came with the condition that the parcel be forever managed as a passive woodland open space.\n\n**ADDRESS:** Olympic View Drive and 180th Street SW, Edmonds\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5 southbound, take exit 181 (196th Street SW\/WA 524) and merge onto 196th Street SW. After 2.6 miles turn right onto 76th Avenue W. Turn left at Olympic View Drive. The parking lot is on your left after you pass 180th Street SW.\n\nFrom I-5 northbound, take exit 179 (220th Street SW). Turn left onto 220th Street SW. Turn right at 76th Avenue W, then left onto Olympic View Drive. The parking lot is on your left after you pass 180th Street SW.\n\n**CONTACT:** Snohomish County Parks and Recreation Department, (425) 388-6600, www.snohomishcountywa.gov\/\u200bparks\n\n## **12 YOST PARK**\n\n**Edmonds, 17 miles southwest of Everett**\n\n**_Explore interpretive trails along Shell Creek in these 48 acres of forested ravine and wetlands_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **About 1.5 miles total; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Playground, tennis court, interpretive trail; summer only: restrooms, picnic tables, pool**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Ridge Trail, restrooms, pool area**\n\nDespite its well-trodden trails, this ravine of wooded wildness in a neat residential area of Edmonds may be unknown to folks who come for the more obvious pleasures: swimming and picnicking. Deep in the greenery below the pool, Shell Creek cuts a path through a second-growth red-alder forest.\n\nTo walk in this sylvan wonderland, leave the parking lot by the yellow maintenance gate and stroll Ridge Trail (the paved maintenance road) east along the rim of the gulch. From here you can look into the upper branches of alders, maples, and firs as though you were an owl perched nearby, surveying your entire domain. There are several places where you can descend to the natural trail, letting the shouts of playing children fade above you. Listen instead for the high, tinkling warble of the winter wren or the _dee-dee-dee_ of the black-capped chickadee.\n\nWooden bridges and walkways cross Shell Creek and its tributaries (some dry by late summer). The eroded banks of these streams show evidence of winter flooding. To prevent erosion, stay on the trails in this steep forest. Old stumps, long dead themselves, now provide life to cedar saplings and red huckleberry. Numbered posts correspond to notes on an informal nature guide that is available at the pool or the city parks office at 700 Main Street.\n\nA loop trail encircles the base of the ravine. Feeder trails branch off, some rising steeply up the hillside and then petering out, others emerging on Main Street to the north. To the west, the trail crosses bogs and ends at the remains of an old concrete dam. Backtrack a short way to where the trail climbs again to rejoin the Ridge Trail near the parking area.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 9535 Bowdoin Way, Edmonds\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5 southbound, take exit 179 (220th Street SW\/Mountlake Terrace). Turn right on 220th Street SW. Go about 1.9 miles and turn right onto 92nd Avenue W. Go 0.5 miles and turn left onto Bowdoin Way. The park entrance is on the right, on the corner of Bowdoin Way and 96th Avenue W.\n\nFrom I-5 northbound, take exit 177 (WA 104\/Edmonds). Follow WA 104 toward Edmonds. Go about 2.8 miles and turn right on 100th Avenue W. This becomes 9th Avenue S. Go about 1 mile and turn right on Walnut Street, which becomes Bowdoin Way.\n\n**CONTACT:** Edmonds Parks, Recreation, and Cultural Services Department; (425) 771-0230; www.edmondswa.gov\/\u200bparks-recreation-departments\/\u200bexplore-parks.html\n\n## **13 LYNNDALE PARK**\n\n**Lynnwood, 15 miles southwest of Everett**\n\n**_Stroll this 40-acre enclave of quiet second-growth forest just minutes from suburbia_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1.5 miles total; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles on paved trails**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, playground, picnic shelter, amphitheater, basketball courts, ball fields, tennis courts, skate park**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved trail, restrooms, picnic shelter**\n\nLike many other community parks, this one hides its best features behind sports courts and picnic shelters. Very accessible to wheelchairs, strollers, and little feet in skates, 0.5 miles of paved trails lead from the easternmost parking lot west past an amphitheater, and from there another mile of trail winds through the quiet second-growth forest. Here big-leaf maples form a cool canopy in summer or create graceful frames around a pale winter sky. Autumn paints the forest orange, red, yellow, and brown.\n\nThe paved trail crosses wide gravel trails and narrow natural trails, all hinting at the possibilities for exploration. Venture onto the natural trails and find the ravine (an old gravel pit, long ago reclaimed by nature) and the new wooden steps, the latter courtesy of the local Boy Scouts. The park boundaries are clear, so wander at will.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 18927 72nd Avenue W, Lynnwood\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5 southbound, take exit 181 (WA 524). Merge onto 196th Street SW. In 2 miles turn right onto 68th Avenue W. Turn left onto 189th Place SW, then left onto 72nd Avenue W.\n\nFrom I-5 northbound, take exit 179 (220th Street SW). Turn left on 220th Street SW. In about 0.5 miles turn right onto 66th Avenue W. In 0.8 miles turn left onto 208th Street SW then right onto 68th Avenue W. After 1 mile turn left onto 189th Place SW. Go 0.3 miles and turn left onto 72nd Avenue W. A northern parking lot is reached via Olympic View Drive.\n\n**CONTACT:** Lynnwood Parks, Recreation, and Cultural Arts Department; (425) 670-5732; www.lynnwoodwa.gov\/\u200bplaylynnwood\/\u200bparks.htm\n\n## **14 TERRACE CREEK PARK**\n\n**Mountlake Terrace, 16 miles south of Everett**\n\n**_A streamside trail wanders through 60 acres of playing fields and forested ravine_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **3 miles round-trip, plus spurs; paved, gravel**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **Off-leash near the Recreation Pavilion, otherwise on leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, playground, picnic areas, disc-golf course, ball fields**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved trail, restrooms**\n\nIn this small neighborhood park, the trail gently ascends a peaceful strip of forest in a ravine below suburban Mountlake Terrace. Beginning as a paved walkway by the playground lawn, the trail soon changes to more rugged gravel and climbs moderately into the stately second-growth forest. Deep in the wooded ravine, the air is still and quiet. Winter wrens hop from bush to bush and woodpeckers tap old snags for their beetles and bugs. This suburban forest is home to opossums, raccoons, and other small forest critters.\n\nLyon Creek murmurs softly alongside the trail. Side trails lead to ridgetop homes invisible behind summer growth, but one trail, heading sharply west, will lead to the Mountlake Terrace Recreation Pavilion, and just north of that, a large off-leash dog park between 53rd Avenue W and 52nd Avenue W. The main north\u2013south trail ends when it reaches 222nd Street SW, but there are numerous side trails to explore along the way.\n\nThe strange-looking objects that resemble open metal trash containers throughout the park are in fact holes for disc golf, a game of skill for those adept at tossing Frisbee-like discs long distances. Most of the disc-golf course is along spur trails on the sides of the steep ravine. It's interesting to imagine the contortions necessary to retrieve stray discs from the thickets of blackberry and nettle.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 23200 48th Avenue W, Mountlake Terrace; _Recreation Pavilion and off-leash area:_ 5303 228th Street SW, Mountlake Terrace\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5 southbound, take exit 179 (220th Street SW\/Mountlake Terrace). Turn left onto 220th Street SW. Turn right on 56th Avenue W, then left on 236th Street SW. Go about 0.8 miles and turn left on 48th Avenue W. The park is on the left at the corner of 48th Avenue W and 233rd Street SW.\n\nFrom I-5 northbound, take exit 178 (236th Street SW\/Mountlake Terrace). Turn right on 236th Street SW and proceed as above.\n\n**CONTACT:** Mountlake Terrace Recreation and Parks Department, (425) 776-9173, www.cityofmlt.com\/\u200b530\/\u200brecreation-parks\n\n## **15 NORTH CREEK PARK**\n\n**Mill Creek, 12 miles south of Everett**\n\n**_Interpretive boardwalks cross 81 acres of wetlands for bird-watching and nature study_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1.5 miles round-trip; boardwalk**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **North Creek Trail**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, interpretive signs, picnic tables, playground, viewpoint**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Restrooms**\n\nStep from the pavement to a sturdy boardwalk rimmed by waving cattails. Overhead, red-tailed hawks may soar, and in the hardhack Virginia rails may cackle. This enclave of open wetlands is excellent for bird-watching or studying the wetland habitat. Although surrounded by suburban homes, the reed canarygrass and beaked sedge grow tall enough to give you a sense of solitude. But you are most definitely not alone: not only is the wetland home to dozens of species of birds, including great blue herons, song sparrows, common snipes, marsh wrens, and many species of ducks, but beavers dwell here as well.\n\nThis level boardwalk trail meanders north for more than 0.5 miles over what is technically called Mukilteo muck (really!), which refers to the waterlogged soil of the wetland. Interpretive signs and benches border the trail; two spurs lead west to ponds and viewpoints near the creek.\n\nCredit 12\n\nNestled between rolling hills, this land was once owned by the Bailey family of Mill Creek. When the county purchased the land, it recognized its value as a natural storm-water retention area. Luckily, they also saw its value as a natural classroom and park.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 1011 183rd Street SE, Mill Creek\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 183 (164th Street SW). Go east on 164th Street for 1.8 miles. Turn right (south) on the Bothell-Everett Highway (WA 527) and go 1.3 miles. Turn right on 183rd Street SE and go 0.2 miles. The park is on the right.\n\n**CONTACT:** Snohomish County Parks and Recreation Department, (425) 388-6600, www.snohomishcountywa.gov\/\u200bparks\n\n**Caught in the Web**\n\n**Late-summer and fall walks on little-used trails mean web-in-the-face hiking. Two options: wave a (dead) fern frond in the air in front of you as you hike, or generously offer to take place number two in line. Feign innocence when your companion turns round to glare at you with a spider on her nose. The upside to webs: damp with mist or morning dew, they glisten like silver necklaces on the branches. Undoubtedly one of nature's finer works of art**.\n\n## **16 BOB HEIRMAN WILDLIFE PRESERVE**\n\n**12 miles southeast of Everett**\n\n**_Meander through 343 acres of wild wetland and meadow out to cobble beaches on oxbows of the Snohomish River_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **2 to 3 miles round-trip; gravel, natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only; no pets**  \n**DOGS** | **Not allowed**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restroom (portable), picnic tables, fishing access**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **None**\n\nA crisp winter day is a good day to step off the manicured trails and tackle the wildness of Bob Heirman Wildlife Preserve, also known to local anglers as Thomas' Eddy. With the deciduous trees spiking the blue sky with slender branches, the views to Mount Baker and the Cascades are unparalleled. It's easier, too, to get good views of the hundreds of overwintering birds on Shadow Lake and Robins Pond. Mallards, grebes, and buffleheads make mottled dark spots on the gray-blue lake, but it is the trumpeter swans, white, graceful, and huge, that stand out from the flock.\n\nThese 343 acres were saved from development by fisherman and activist Bob Heirman, who worked with the county to preserve this habitat for wildlife and fishing access. Today, this wildlife preserve on Thomas' Eddy is being left to return to nature without much interference from county maintenance crews. This means the paths stay clear because of constant use, not mowers and blowers, and when the seasonal floods sweep debris onto the riverbanks, the trails to the water will change.\n\nFrom the well-kept lawns and picnic area near the parking lot, a short gravel path leads to two viewpoints over Shadow Lake for some great birding. From there, walk east toward the river, through high grass in summer but on a clearer trail in winter. Wetlands stretch both north and south of the trail. Near the river's edge, a natural berm creates a dry pathway to lead you either up- or downstream. There may be downed trees to negotiate and trunks to crawl over, so this is not a trail for those seeking an easy stroll. Kids will probably love it, though, as there is a game of finding the best pathway through the flood debris. The goal is to arrive on the expansive, ever-changing cobble beaches of the Snohomish River.\n\nWhen the steelhead run in winter and summer, this is a great fishing area, and you'll likely see fishing skiffs making their way up and down the river. Don't be surprised if the parking lot is full! In the dry season, the river takes on a languid motion and meanders slowly over sand and pebbles, making a possible swimming or wading hole. In winter, though, the river moves with a ferocious current, and it's best viewed from the safety of the cobbled banks.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 14913 Connelly Road, Snohomish\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5 take exit 186 (WA 96 E\/128th Street SW). Go east on WA 96 for 3.3 miles, then veer left onto Seattle Hill Road. After 1.5 miles, turn right onto WA 96\/Lowell-Larimer Road. Continue for 2.7 miles (it becomes Broadway Avenue) and bear left onto Connelly Road. In 0.8 miles the preserve will be on your left.\n\n**CONTACT:** Snohomish County Parks and Recreation Department, (425) 388-6600, www.snohomishcountywa.gov\/\u200bparks\n\n## **17 LORD HILL REGIONAL PARK**\n\n**15 miles southeast of Everett**\n\n**_Snohomish River beaches, ponds, and mountain views highlight this 1,463-acre multiaged forest and wetland habitat_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **More than 6 miles total; gravel, natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to moderate**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles, horses**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, interpretive signs, picnic areas, playground, viewpoints**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **None**\n\nIn the middle of the Snohomish River valley, a single hill rises 600 feet above the floodplain, welcoming walkers and horses to its wild and shaded forest paths. A remnant of long-ago volcanic outcroppings, Lord Hill derives its name from homesteader Mitchell Lord, who had a dairy farm on the flat land below the hill in the 1880s. By the 1930s the last old-growth timber had been cut, and in the 1980s the Department of Natural Resources cut patches of second-growth forest, producing today's multiaged forest and wetland habitat.\n\nFrom the parking lot, head down the fragrant wood-chip path deep into the fir, hemlock, and maple forest. Where the trail levels, you'll be glad of sturdy puncheon bridges that span the miniature wetlands along the horse-trodden trail. Soon the wood chips and puncheons give way to a wide graveled path leading to a T-junction. To the left you reach one of the park's nine ponds. Turning right takes you up a rise in dense forest from which several trails branch off.\n\nThe map at the parking lot can be confusing, and until the signage and trails are completed, keep your internal compass working and ask equestrians the way out if you're not sure. With luck, you'll find one of the ponds with active beavers, or evidence of the resident deer or occasional bear or bobcat. A trek to the pipeline trail or Devil's Butte Lookout affords grand views of Mount Baker to the north and the Olympics to the west.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 12921 150th Street SE, Snohomish\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 194 (US 2\/Wenatchee). Stay right at the end of the trestle and go about 2.5 miles. Turn right onto WA 9. At the Snohomish\/Riverview Road\/2nd Street exit, turn left on 2nd Street, then right onto Lincoln Avenue S (which becomes the Old Snohomish Monroe Highway). Go 2.7 miles and turn right on 127th Avenue SE. Go 2 miles to 150th Street SE. Turn left into the parking lot.\n\n**CONTACT:** Snohomish County Parks and Recreation Department, (425) 388-6600, www.snohomishcountywa.gov\/\u200bparks\n\n## **18 PARADISE VALLEY CONSERVATION AREA**\n\n**Woodinville, 20 miles southeast of Everett**\n\n**_In 793 acres of fern-filled forest, follow miles of well-signed trails to Cascade views and down into lush wetlands_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **13 miles; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to moderate**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles, horses**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, interpretive trail, map signs**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Restrooms**\n\nStep back in time to a land bedecked in soft and rustling sword ferns, a land green with salal and Oregon grape undergrowth, shaded by young deciduous trees. Imagine small dinosaurs lurking about in the brush. Such is the luxuriant beauty of Paradise Valley Conservation Area. This almost 800-acre park was part of the 1887 homestead of the Lloyd family and remained in the family until its purchase by Snohomish County in 2000. Logging roads crisscrossed the land and form the basis for some of today's trails through the almost 100-year-old secondary forest. The ridge trails remain green throughout the year under their canopy of Douglas fir and western hemlock, while the valley's cottonwoods, willows, and dogwoods glow with color in autumn. The park's extensive wetlands are home to beavers, frogs, and salamanders, while the forest provides habitat for coyotes, bears, and cougars. Just outside the current park boundary (but part of the next phase of development), Cottage Lake Creek abounds in resident trout and is graced by migrating salmon in spawning season.\n\nWell-developed and maintained multiuse trails testify to the park's appeal to a variety of users and its strong support in the hiking, mountain biking, and equestrian communities. There are miles of hiking-only trails, and with extensive signage, walkers can choose to avoid the popular (and sometimes muddy) biking trails if they wish. The gentle Whispering Firs Interpretive Trail is a great starter hike for young families.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 23210 Paradise Lake Road, Woodinville\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 182 merging onto I-405 S. Take exit 23A to WA 522 east. Go left at the fork merging onto WA 522 E. Turn right at Paradise Lake Road. Go 1.7 miles to the parking lot, which is just north of the Lloyd family farm on the west side of the road.\n\nFrom I-405 northbound, take exit 23 (US 2) toward Woodinville\/Wenatchee, then merge onto WA 522 E. Go 5 miles and turn right at Paradise Lake Road. The parking lot is 1.7 miles down the road on the right.\n\n**CONTACT:** Snohomish County Parks and Recreation Department, (425) 388-6600, www.snohomishcountywa.gov\/\u200bparks\n\n# **SEATTLE**\n\n**19** Boeing Creek and Shoreview Parks\n\n**20** Hamlin Park\n\n**21** Carkeek Park\n\n**22** Golden Gardens Park\n\n**23** Discovery Park\n\n**24** Green Lake Park\n\n**25** Burke-Gilman Trail\n\n**26** Ravenna Park\n\n**27** Warren G. Magnuson Park and NOAA Art Walk\n\n**28** Union Bay Natural Area\n\n**29** Washington Park Arboretum\n\n**30** Interlaken Park\n\n**31** The Grand Forest (Bainbridge Island)\n\n**32** Gazzam Lake Nature Preserve (Bainbridge Island)\n\n**33** Fort Ward Park (Bainbridge Island)\n\n**34** Schmitz Preserve Park\n\n**35** Camp Long\n\n**36** Lincoln Park\n\n**37** Westcrest Park\n\n**38** Luther Burbank Park (Mercer Island)\n\n**39** Pioneer Park (Mercer Island)\n\n**40** Seward Park\n\n**41** Kubota Garden\n\n## **19 BOEING CREEK AND SHOREVIEW PARKS**\n\n**Shoreline, 17 miles north of downtown Seattle**\n\n**_79 acres of neighboring parks offer urban amenities and pristine nature where a clear stream fills a hidden lake_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **4 miles; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Boeing Creek: Pedestrians only; Shoreview: Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **Off-leash area in Shoreview Park, otherwise leash and scoop**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Boeing Creek: Benches, picnic area; Shoreview: Restrooms, playground, picnic area, ball fields, lake access (no lifeguard)**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved trails and restrooms in Shoreview Park**\n\nFollow serpentine trails deep into the ravine and then up onto the ridge of this green gem of a forest in the heart of Shoreline. Watch for pileated woodpeckers on the snags and cedar waxwings in the meadows in summer. Rated one of Puget Sound's finest urban forests by the scientists at EarthCorps\/Seattle Urban Nature, Boeing Creek Park has a corps of volunteers who have put in many hours rejuvenating the trails and removing invasive plants from the waterway. The park is home to mountain beavers, raccoons, and red foxes, as well as a number of unusual trees such as a 200-year-old western yew. Both eastern gray squirrels and Douglas squirrels frolic among the branches.\n\nFrom the northern parking lot, you can walk around the detention pond or dive straight into the forest. Going southwest (right) into the forest, the trail follows the streambed, crossing over a bridge of concrete steps placed there by a Girl Scout troop and replaced each year when the stream floods. The sandy soil is especially vulnerable to erosion, so it's important to stay on the trail and not be tempted to take shortcuts up the steep ravine sides. Coming round a corner brings you to Hidden Lake with its glass-clear water and usually a family or two of ducks. If you're lucky, you may see them dive and skim the algae off the bottom of the lake. Wading is allowed, but there is no lifeguard.\n\nFrom Hidden Lake, the trail climbs through the forest to emerge in an open space of broom and berries, madrona, and cottonwood. Although the boundary isn't marked, you've now crossed into adjoining Shoreview Park, an active recreation area with tennis courts, sports fields, restrooms, playground, and ADA-accessible walkways. Above the tennis courts is a large off-leash area with a track for running your canine friend through his or her paces. Back to the north, into the forest again, the trail stays high on a traverse above the creek and then angles down to meet the streambed once again in Boeing Creek Park.\n\n**ADDRESS:** _Boeing Creek Park:_ 17229 3rd Avenue NW, Shoreline; _Shoreview Park:_ 700 NW Innis Arden Way, Shoreline\n\n**GETTING THERE:** _Boeing Creek Park:_ From I-5, take exit 176 (NE 175th Street). Go west on 175th Street. Continue 0.8 miles and turn left on Aurora Avenue N. Go 0.8 miles and turn right onto N 160th Street. For Boeing Creek Park, turn right on Dayton Avenue N. Go 0.3 miles and make a slight left onto Carlyle Hall Road N. Continue about 0.5 miles onto 3rd Avenue NW. The park is on your left. There is street parking here. Further parking is ahead and to the left on N 175th Street.\n\n_Shoreview Park:_ Follow the directions above to N 160th Street. Continue on N 160th Street until it becomes Innis Arden Way. Drive about 0.5 miles to Shoreview Park on the right.\n\n**CONTACT:** Shoreline Parks, Recreation, and Cultural Services Department; (206) 801-2600; www.shorelinewa.gov\/\u200bgovernment\/\u200bdepartments\/\u200bparks-recreation-cultural-services\n\n**Trees Wanted\u2014Dead or Alive**\n\n**When you see a downed log or an old snag or stump, think of all the years the tree lived before it fell or burned. And look at all the life it supports now that it's dead. Old logs (usually Douglas fir) with young trees growing out of them are called nurse logs. Stumps can also host the new growth of other plant species. As the late Californian biologist Tony Hacking used to say, \"A tree is arguably more alive after it's dead.\"**\n\n## **20 HAMLIN PARK**\n\n**Shoreline, 11 miles north of downtown Seattle**\n\n**_Walk in 80 acres of towering, open forest with wide paths and open ravines, or stroll the perimeter of sunny ball fields_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **3 miles; paved, natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restroom, picnic tables, playground, ball fields, art, orienteering course, historic canons**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved trail bordering ball fields**\n\nStep from your car and inhale air redolent with the scent of cedar wood chips. Follow wide, well-maintained trails into a dream forest of open glades, rolling hills, ravines with stairs cut into them, and fern-decorated slopes. A stroll in Hamlin Park can be an easy meander along almost level paths or a heart-stimulating walk up and down the three 50- to 80-foot-deep ravines that divide the park under glades of pines, hemlock, dogwood, and cedar. The wood-chip pile is testimony to the ongoing efforts of the Shoreline maintenance crew to keep this beautiful forest accessible to foot traffic by clearing downed trees and branches.\n\nIn our Northwest of dense, dark forests with tangled undergrowth, Hamlin is unprecedented for its lack of understory beneath towering trees. But beautiful as it is, the parks people would prefer an even more natural setting, and to this end they are experimenting with reintroducing native herbs and shrubs in a large fenced-off regeneration area. Elsewhere, salal and sword fern grow in comely bunches between log-lined trails and next to wood-rimmed steps, giving this park a feeling of a manicured forest, a place where it seems bright even on the darkest days.\n\nOut of the forest, in the park's southern region, you'll find a strange couple of historic relics: two eight-inch naval canons from the Spanish-American War, said to have fired the first shots in Manila Bay in 1898. Just how and why they were taken off the USS _Boston_ and transported to Seattle (before Shoreline was Shoreline) seems a bit of a mystery. Hamlin has the requisite playground and restrooms as well as a sculpture that visitors can sit on ( _Dew Beads_ , glass and concrete balls evoking dewdrops in the forest) and playing fields, ready for shouts and cheers in baseball season.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 16006 15th Avenue NE, Seattle\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 175 (NE 145th Street). Go east on 145th for 0.5 miles to 15th Avenue NE. Turn left onto 15th and go 0.9 miles to 160th Street. The park entrance is on your right.\n\n**CONTACT:** Shoreline Parks, Recreation, and Cultural Services Department; (206) 801-2600; www.shorelinewa.gov\/\u200bgovernment\/\u200bdepartments\/\u200bparks-recreation-cultural-services\n\n## **21 CARKEEK PARK**\n\n**8 miles north of downtown Seattle**\n\n**_Piper's Creek winds through 216 acres of forest to Puget Sound and views of the Olympic Mountains_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **6.1 miles; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to moderate**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic shelters, playgrounds, Environmental Learning Center, model airplane field, demonstration garden**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Salmon-to-Sound Trail, Wetland Trail, part of Piper's Creek Trail, restrooms**\n\nLeave commercial Seattle behind as you wind down either a road or a footpath into this verdant ravine, where moss clings to the big-leaf maples and old logs straddle Piper's Creek. Like other ravines along Puget Sound, this one enchants with the steady downward flow of several small streams, the surprising gurgles of miniature waterfalls, and the profuse undergrowth of the forest. Salmon still spawn in this urban stream.\n\nIn spring the trailside is lush with salmonberry bushes, the fruit still yellow and orange, awaiting the summer sun. Incredibly large stumps, too big to hug, provide nutrients for young salal bushes and Douglas firs. But all is not wild here. The old orchard remains as testimony to the early settlers, A. W. Piper and his wife, Minna, who supplied produce to downtown Seattle from this homestead in the late 1800s.\n\nA beautiful demonstration garden is now flourishing thanks to the ministrations of a score of volunteers. Look for this horticultural gem near the upper entrance to the park.\n\nIn the lower parking area, look for the stairs leading up to the footbridge that crosses over the train tracks to the watery world of Puget Sound. The sound of whinnying robins is replaced by the call of gulls, and your eyes are no longer drawn to branches overhead but farther away to the lofty Olympics in the west, or to your feet, where the sand ripples under the retreating tide.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 950 NW Carkeek Park Road, Seattle\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 173 (Northgate Way\/1st Avenue NE). From southbound, go right on N Northgate Way (which becomes N 105th Street). From northbound, turn left on 1st Avenue NE, then left on N Northgate Way and go under the freeway. Drive west and turn right on Greenwood Avenue N. Go 2 blocks and turn left on NW 110th Street (which becomes Carkeek Park Road and winds down to the lower parking lot). Gates close at 9:00 p.m.\n\nTo access the trail at the southeast end of the park, stay on N 105th Street as it veers left to become Holman Road NW. Turn right on 3rd Avenue NW. Go 1 block and turn left on NW 100th Place to reach the small picnic and parking area.\n\n**CONTACT:** Seattle Parks and Recreation Department, (206) 684-4075, www.seattle.gov\/\u200bparks\n\n**Safe Walks with Kids**\n\n**Establish clear rules for on-the-trail behavior: stay in sight, no running on forest paths, walk on the right side on multiuse trails, stand still to let horses pass, and always ask to pet horses or dogs. Beware of poison oak (usually signposted because it's rare), devil's club, and stinging nettle. Don't eat wild berries unless you're 100 percent sure what they are**.\n\n## **22 GOLDEN GARDENS PARK**\n\n**11 miles northwest of downtown Seattle**\n\n**_With 88 acres over Puget Sound, you can traverse level forest trails, descend from a fern-filled forest to the beach, or peruse the beach and wetlands_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **3.2 miles; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only on upper trails**  \n**DOGS** | **Off-leash area in the upper park, otherwise leash and scoop**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Picnic tables, restrooms, playground, interpretive signs**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Lower parking lot trail**\n\nTraverse gently sloping forest trails where ferns line the hillside and big-leaf maples stand tall above the soft dirt pathway. Here, more than 120 feet above Puget Sound, you can almost sense the Seattle of old, before the regrades and hill sculpting tore down the steep wooded slopes. From the off-leash area at the upper parking lot, you can walk back and forth on gentle slopes or take one of several steep staircases built into the hillside either up to the neighborhood above or down to the lower parking lot and beach.\n\nKnown mostly as a summer play park, with beaches, lawn, and playground, Golden Gardens has so much more to offer. In winter, the spindly branches of the alders frame the brilliant white of the Olympic Mountains to the west, and through clear openings you can watch the ships and occasional courageous sailor on the Sound. In summer, the forest trails provide seclusion above the clamor of the playground, and you can hear the calls of the wrens and robins.\n\nNear the lower parking lot, small wetland ponds create habitat for wintering birds such as gadwall, buffleheads, and mallards. And there is always the beach to wander, where the fresh salt air is a tonic for office-weary minds.\n\nThe Burlington Northern Santa Fe Railway runs through the park, and it is dangerous and illegal to cross the tracks. A pedestrian underpass is provided for safe passage from the upper and lower parking lots. Unlike other city parks, which close at sunset, Golden Gardens is open year-round until well after dark (see park signs, or call for hours), and beach fires are allowed.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 8498 Seaview Place NW, Seattle\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5 northbound, take exit 172 (N 85th Street) toward Aurora Avenue N. Drive west on NW 85th Street for 3.2 miles. Turn right onto 32nd Avenue NW. Wind down the hill on Golden Gardens Drive NW. The forest trails and off-leash parking will be on your right. For the beach and lower trails, continue to the bottom of the hill and turn right on Seaview Place NW and into the parking lot.\n\n**CONTACT:** Seattle Parks and Recreation Department, (206) 684-4075, www.seattle.gov\/\u200bparks\/. To volunteer at a Seattle park, call (206) 684-8028.\n\n## **23 DISCOVERY PARK**\n\n**6 miles northwest of downtown Seattle (Magnolia neighborhood)**\n\n**_Walk 534 acres of meadows, wetlands, forest, and beaches for views, bird-watching, art, and a historical lighthouse_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **11.8 miles (including the 0.5-mile Wolf Tree Nature Trail and the 2.8-mile Loop Trail) plus 200-foot beach; gravel, natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles on paved roadways only; pedestrians only on Loop Trail, Wolf Tree Nature Trail**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash; no dogs on Wolf Tree Nature Trail or the beach**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, classes, playground, picnic areas, sports courts, interpretive signs, maps, Daybreak Star Indian Cultural Center**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Restrooms, buildings, paved trail, pass available to drive to beach**\n\nWalk a windswept bluff by a grassy meadow, hunt ghost shrimp on the Puget Sound beach, or search the treetops for an eagle's nest. With more than 11 miles of trails to tread, Seattle's largest park presents a variety of Northwest habitats to explore just minutes from downtown.\n\nStart at the visitor center (east gate) for maps, then set off on the Loop Trail to the west. Crossing the flower-strewn meadow, watch for violet-green swallows in summer, or listen for the screech of hawks in winter. The old buildings are what remain of Fort Lawton, now recently converted to private homes with gated access.\n\nFrom the sandy bluff, listen for foghorns and the barks of sea lions, and watch the vessels ply the Sound far below. If the wind is from the south, head down the forested trail to South Beach (the goal being to stay upwind of the Metro sewage treatment plant on the headland). The trail is steep, with steps and observation platforms. Geology buffs can study the 300-foot cliffs for clues to our region's glaciated past.\n\nBack on the Loop Trail, stick to the larger, marked trails. Later, as you become familiar with the large park's layout, you can explore the shortcuts and side trails with confidence. The Loop Trail takes you past the south entrance's picnic area and playground before returning to the visitor center. At the north parking lot, leave time for the 0.5-mile Wolf Tree Nature Trail, which features interpretive signs and peaceful walking.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 3801 W Government Way, Seattle\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 169 (NE 50th Street\/NE 45th Street). Turn west on NE 50th Street and go about 1.7 miles (past the zoo) until it merges right onto NW Market Street; continue west. Turn left on 15th Avenue NW, cross the Ballard Bridge, and take the first exit on the right (Fisherman's Terminal\/Emerson). Emerson merges to the right onto Gilman Avenue W; continue west. At W Fort Street, bear left; it becomes W Government Way and leads to the park's east entrance.\n\nOrganized groups and cars with children under 7 or people over 62, or those with a state disabled permit, may be able to drive to the beach on the park's access road; inquire at the visitor center.\n\n**CONTACT:** Seattle Parks and Recreation Department, (206) 684-4075, www.seattle.gov\/\u200bparks. For information on volunteering, visit www.friends\u00addiscoverypark.org. For information on the Daybreak Star Indian Cultural Center, call (206) 285-4425.\n\n## **24 GREEN LAKE PARK**\n\n**4.5 miles north of downtown Seattle**\n\n**_Green lawns and landscaping border the paved trail that circumnavigates placid 260-acre Green Lake_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **2.8-mile loop; paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles, in-line skaters (in designated lane)**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Woodland Park trails (south of lake)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic area, playground, beach, boating (nonmotorized), community center, concessions, fishing piers, sports fields, theater, wading pool**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Trail, restrooms, buildings, playground**\n\nCircle this peaceful urban lake on a defined 2.8-mile paved trail and meet a cross section of Seattle life. Year-round, Green Lake attracts families, dog walkers, joggers, bicyclists, the old, and the young\u2014all out to enjoy this strip of greenery in the 324-acre park. In spring, walk beneath flowering cherry and dogwood trees. In fall, look for the red berries on the hawthorns.\n\nNo matter the time of year, there is activity on the lake: in summer the paddle-boaters, small sailboats, and windsurfers; in winter the wind kicking up whitecaps. Two nature-preserve islands provide shelter for many birds but are inaccessible to walkers except through the magic of binoculars. Fall, winter, and spring are the best times to see the migratory birds such as buffleheads and white-fronted geese. Throughout the year, the omnipresent mallards and Canada geese forage in the reeds by the lake's edge, and red-winged blackbirds add a splash of color to the scene.\n\nCredit 18\n\nBecause of the paved trail's popularity, traffic flow on it is regulated: walkers (including those with baby strollers) take the inside half and can travel either direction, while those on wheels must stick to a counterclockwise direction on the outer half. A crushed-gravel trail parallel to the paved path allows joggers and walkers to circle without encountering bicyclists.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 7201 E Green Lake Drive N, Seattle\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 169 (NE 45th Street\/NE 50th Street) and head west on NE 50th Street. Go about 0.8 miles to Green Lake Way N, turn right, and park along the street by the lake or in lots farther north. Alternatively, continue west on NE 50th Street to park near the tennis courts (on the right). This also allows easy access to the wooded trails and hillsides of Woodland Park.\n\n**CONTACT:** Seattle Parks and Recreation Department, (206) 684-4075, www.seattle.gov\/\u200bparks\n\n## **25 BURKE-GILMAN TRAIL**\n\n**4 miles north of downtown Seattle (Ballard neighborhood) to Kenmore, 12 miles north of Seattle**\n\n**_Walk from park to park along Lakes Union and Washington via an old railroad grade_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **16.5 miles one way; paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles, in-line skaters**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Warren G. Magnuson Park and NOAA Art Walk (Walk #27), Sammamish River Trail (Walk #42)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, beaches, picnic areas**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Trail, restrooms, picnic areas**\n\nBeginning in the Ballard neighborhood of Seattle and snaking along the shore of Lake Washington to Kenmore, this 16.5-mile paved corridor of off-road walking meets the needs of those who seek the freedom of the trail just blocks from home.\n\nThis wide, paved, multiuse trail follows the original grade of the Seattle, Lake Shore, and Eastern Railroad, which, after almost a century, was abandoned in 1971 under the ownership of Burlington Northern. Seven years later, Seattle opened the Burke-Gilman (named in honor of the original railroad's founders) as an off-road multiuse trail. Near the western end, the trail passes Gas Works Park, a miniwalk in itself, with views of Lake Union and downtown Seattle, then continues east through the University of Washington campus and north past Warren G. Magnuson Park (Walk #27). Enjoy the fall colors of the hazelnut trees and big-leaf maples along this stretch.\n\nCredit 19\n\nNorth from here, increasing greenery lines the trail, which often runs between backyards that are well landscaped with both native and exotic trees and shrubs. You get peekaboo views of Lake Washington, but the best is saved for the far north. Blackberries line the trail, providing spring color and fragrance and summer snacking. Two miles past Log Boom Park (Tracy Owen Station) in Kenmore, the trail changes to the Sammamish River Trail (Walk #42). Here you can enjoy a beach, a green lawn, and views south across Lake Washington.\n\nOne warning: the trail is heavily used by bicyclists and in-line skaters. Always walk on the right\u2014in single file if it's a busy weekend. Toddlers and impatient children might do better on a quieter trail.\n\n**ADDRESS:** _Access at Warren G. Magnuson Park:_ 7400 Sand Point Way NE, Seattle; _Access at Log Boom Park:_ 61st Avenue NE, Kenmore\n\n**GETTING THERE:** The best access with parking: Warren G. Magnuson Park (see Walk #27), or Log Boom Park, Kenmore. Trail brochure shows other access points.\n\n_Log Boom Park:_ From I-5 northbound, take exit 171 (WA 522\/Bothell\/Lake City Way). Go north 6.5 miles, and in Kenmore turn right on 61st Avenue NE. The park is on the right.\n\nFrom I-405 northbound, take exit 23 (WA 522 W\/Bothell); southbound, take exit 23B (WA 522 W\/Bothell). Go west on WA 522 about 4.4 miles, and turn left on 61st Avenue NE. The park is on the right.\n\n**CONTACT:** Seattle Parks and Recreation Department, (206) 684-4075, www.seattle.gov\/\u200bparks\n\n## **26 RAVENNA PARK**\n\n**5 miles northeast of downtown Seattle**\n\n**_Explore 50 acres of tranquil forest trails in a stream-cut ravine hidden from urban bustle_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **4.5 miles total; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles on 5-foot-wide paths only**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic tables, playground, tennis courts, wading pool**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Restrooms, playground at Cowen Park**\n\nThis secret cleft of choice greenery in the midst of urban Seattle offers some of the quietest, most treasured walking in the city. In fair weather, the steep side trails, the paths along the rims, and the wide trail in the ravine are filled with hikers, joggers, and dog walkers. Even in winter, when a dusting of snow coats the trail, footprints still tell of dedicated Ravenna-lovers out to enjoy their park despite slippery trails and a partially frozen stream.\n\nOne of Seattle's oldest parks\u2014acquired before the 1909 Alaska-Yukon-Pacific Exposition\u2014Ravenna has seen bad years and good. Known at midcentury as a squatter's haven, it was later cleaned up and has now become a magnet park for Seattleites.\n\nFrom the massive footbridge (at 20th Avenue NE) over the ravine and the rim trails where wild roses and berry bushes bloom, you look out into the canopy of immense red alder and maple. As you descend the angled trails that traverse the hillside, the vegetation changes to a mix of native and ornamental trees (yew, redwood, Pacific dogwood, Douglas fir) sheltering an undergrowth of fern and salal. Leaning madrona trees form intricate patterns with their peeling bark branches.\n\nOnce in the ravine, you have no sense of city, no sight of houses. The stream flows from west to east, heading for Lake Washington. Working its way around boulders and logs, it brings nutrients to the skunk cabbages and stream creatures that live in its water and along its banks.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 5520 Ravenna Avenue NE, Seattle\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 169 (NE 50th Street\/NE 45th Street) and head east on NE 50th Street. Turn left (north) onto 11th Avenue NE, then, in 4 blocks, turn right onto (divided) Ravenna Boulevard. Go 3 blocks to Brooklyn Avenue NE and park on the street near Cowen Park; walk up Cowen Place NE to the western edge of Ravenna Park. You can also continue east on NE Ravenna Boulevard to the recreational end of Ravenna Park.\n\nAlternatively, from I-5 northbound only, take exit 170 (Ravenna Boulevard\/NE 65th Street) and go right on Ravenna Boulevard to Cowen Park.\n\n**CONTACT:** Seattle Parks and Recreation Department, (206) 684-4075, www.seattle.gov\/\u200bparks\n\n## **27 WARREN G. MAGNUSON PARK AND NOAA ART WALK**\n\n**8 miles northeast of downtown Seattle**\n\n**_Enjoy 320 acres of beaches, meadows, Cascade views, art, and an off-leash area along Lake Washington_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **About 3 miles total; gravel, natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles; NOAA trail is pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **Off-leash area, otherwise on leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Burke-Gilman Trail (Walk #25) via streets**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, art, boat launch, picnic areas, playground, ball fields, tennis courts, wading pool, off-leash area**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Shoreline trail in Magnuson Park, restrooms, picnic areas**\n\nStill called Sand Point from its former days as a naval station, Magnuson Park is one of the brightest parks in the Seattle area, with miles of open meadows and lakeshore walking. Purchased from the navy in 1975, the park has seen years of improvement since the bleak days when it smelled of aviation fuel. To increase the greenery, the city originally planted trees, many of which died from lack of water. Now the park's pastoral setting is part of its allure, and any future plantings call for native shrubs, not trees. Only the southern end has a forested hillside with dirt trails; elsewhere, be prepared for sun and wind.\n\nBlustery days offer entertainment as you walk the wide aggregate trail from south to north. Windsurfers and wakeboarders race from the headland onto the wind-whipped lake, and kite-flying aficionados wrestle with their colorful winged creatures from the hillock.\n\nIf you come with a dog, follow signs to the northwestern border of the park, where the designated off-leash area is rimmed by luscious summer blackberry thickets. This trail meanders past the playing fields and rejoins the paved aggregate walkway where it meets Lake Washington.\n\nNorth of the off-leash area a fence marks the boundary of the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA). Due to heightened security the gate on the northeast corner is opened to the public from 11:30 a.m. to 1:30 p.m. Monday through Friday only, or you can walk into NOAA grounds via the main gate from 9:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m. Monday through Friday. To enter, you need to show a valid ID and undergo a security check (no picnic baskets or large containers are allowed). Dogs are allowed on-leash. Five art-in-the-parks projects here enhance the waterside graveled walk. Stroll across two bridges inscribed with quotes from _Moby-Dick_ , enjoy views over the lake at _Berth Haven_ and _Viewpoint Terrace_ , guess the artist's intentions for the conical _Knoll for NOAA_ , and walk through a haunting, moaning, otherworldly symphony of wind in _A Sound Garden_.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 7400 Sand Point Way NE, Seattle\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 169 (NE 45th Street\/NE 50th Street). Drive east on NE 45th Street past the University of Washington, down the viaduct, and another 0.5 miles. Bear left onto Sand Point Way NE. Turn right on NE 65th Street or NE 74th Street into Magnuson Park. The NOAA Art Walk extends north from Magnuson Park.\n\n**CONTACT:** Seattle Parks and Recreation Department, (206) 684-4075, www.seattle.gov\/\u200bparks. To volunteer, contact Magnuson Environmental Stewardship Alliance: www.magnusonstewardship.org. For more information on the NOAA Art Walk, visit www.wrc.noaa.gov.\n\n## **28 UNION BAY NATURAL AREA**\n\n**5 miles northeast of downtown Seattle**\n\n**_Resident and migrating birds abound among 74 acres of meadows, wetlands, and ponds on Lake Washington_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1.5 miles total with loops north and south; gravel, natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles except on Yesler Swamp Trail**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms (weekday only), picnic tables, botanical garden, interpretive signs**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Trails, Yesler Swamp, restrooms (weekday only)**\n\nThis swath of untamed greenery between the University of Washington's Husky Stadium and the Center for Urban Horticulture is a stopover for thousands of migrating waterfowl and other birds on the Pacific Flyway. Come during fall, winter, or spring, when the ponds may host ruddy ducks, hooded mergansers, and green- or blue-winged teals. The trees and bushes may be dotted with goldfinches, vireos, and waxwings. In summer the meadows are bright with yellow Scotch broom and blue chicory. All year long, mute swans glide on the calm waters of Union Bay, while Swainson's hawks hunt overhead and muskrats make their homes in Shoveler's Pond.\n\nBefore 1916 this was another cove of Lake Washington, but when the ship canal was built the water receded and the land slowly adapted to its dry status. It's now an ecological research area, and walkers are welcome provided they keep pets on a leash and walk only on established paths.\n\nFrom Wahkiakum Lane, take the first left onto a wood-chip trail, which passes the seasonal Shoveler's Pond (dry in summer) and then crosses the meadow to the lakeshore. Stay alert for ring-tailed pheasants in the grass and the shadow of eagles overhead. Several small paths weave through the cattails at the water's edge. In summer these are practically impassable due to blackberry invasion, but in winter you can find tiny clearings from which you can watch the lake-loving waterfowl.\n\nContinue on the paths around the other ponds, where you may see plovers and bitterns. New plantings of dogwood and other trees enhance the seclusion and help ensure the repeated return of the seasonal migrants. To the east of the parking lot Yesler Swamp is now ADA compliant. Boardwalks lead you to viewpoints in the wetlands by the lake. Union Bay is a walk for nature observers and for those who find pleasure in the wildlife surprises that each walk brings.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 3501 NE 41st Street, Seattle\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 169 (NE 45th Street\/NE 50th Street). Drive east on NE 45th Street and go past the University of Washington and down the viaduct, staying on NE 45th Street. Turn right on Mary Gates Memorial Way following signs to the Center for Urban Horticulture (CUH). The longer preserve walk starts to the west of the parking lot, and Yesler Swamp Trail to the east.\n\nFrom WA 520 westbound, take the exit for Montlake Boulevard NE and go north. Stay right, passing Husky Stadium and merging with NE 45th Street heading east. Turn right on Mary Gates Memorial Way and proceed as above.\n\n**CONTACT:** University of Washington Center for Urban Horticulture, (206) 543-8616, http:\/\/depts.washington.edu\/\u200buwbg\/\u200bvisit\/\u200bcuh.php. For information on volunteering, visit www.yeslerswamp.org.\n\n## **29 WASHINGTON PARK ARBORETUM**\n\n**4 miles east of downtown Seattle**\n\n**_Birds and botanical treasures abound in gardens and wetlands in this 194-acre park along Lake Washington_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **Waterfront 0.5 miles one way, garden paths at least 4 miles; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles on paved roads only**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash; not allowed in Japanese Garden**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, playground, classes, flower shows, gift shop, interpretive trail, Japanese Garden (admission fee), visitor center**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Azalea Way (when dry), restrooms, visitor center**\n\nWith each season, color lures you deeper into the graceful elegance of the arboretum. Spring and summer bring an explosion of pink and white cherry blossoms; red, purple, and yellow rhododendrons; pink and white camellias; and an artist's palette of other perennials. Fall's warm tones of orange and yellow brighten the trails. Even in winter, the myriad colors of bark, foliage, and winter berries contrast cheerfully with the drab days; as you walk, look for the striped maples, the tiger bark of the cherry trees, and the sinewy shapes of trees and shrubs.\n\nFirst-time visitors may want to get a free map of this 194-acre park from the Graham Visitors Center and then set off on Azalea Way, taking small side trips into specialized gardens such as the Winter Garden, the Rhododendron Glen, and the Woodland Garden. Meander over paths on hillsides planted with exotic trees and shrubs. Cross the old stone bridge to the Pinetum for the pungent scent of fir and pine.\n\nAlong the Waterfront Trail bordering Lake Washington, birds abound. Here you'll find mallards, coots, and grebes. In spring the tree swallows swoop and dive for insects above the marsh and in the evenings return to their nesting boxes along the trail. Canada geese nest on the hummocks beneath the reeds and cattails. Test your knowledge of marsh plants with the self-guiding tour booklet that illustrates many of the common plants seen here. Whatever your reason for walking, this mature and well-loved park, dating back to 1934, provides constantly changing botanical treasures on its interlacing trails.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 2300 Arboretum Drive E, Seattle\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 168B (WA 520\/Bellevue). Take the first exit (Montlake) from WA 520. Cross Montlake Boulevard NE and wind down the hill to the junction with Lake Washington Boulevard E. Turn right onto the boulevard and then left onto Foster Island Road. As you wind past several parking areas, Graham Visitors Center is on your left; free park maps are available.\n\nFrom WA 520 westbound, take the Lake Washington Boulevard exit. The ramp turns left over the freeway; at the junction with Lake Washington Boulevard E, turn left. Take the next left onto Foster Island Road and proceed as above.\n\n**CONTACT:** The Graham Visitors Center, (206) 543-8800, www.uwbotanicgardens.org. Call for volunteer opportunities.\n\n## **30 INTERLAKEN PARK**\n\n**4.5 miles east of downtown Seattle**\n\n**_Find 52 acres of forested ravines teeming with birds and astounding views from Volunteer Park_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **About 1 mile round-trip; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle (paved trail) to steep (natural trails)**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Via short road walk, pathways in Volunteer Park and, when open, Lake View Cemetery**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Benches**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved road (closed to vehicles)\u2014caution: may not meet ADA requirement for a slope of less than 10 percent**\n\nListen for the drumming of pileated woodpeckers or the chatter of squirrels as you stroll a historical greenbelt in the heart of Seattle. Interlaken is a birding hot spot hosting robins, bald eagles, osprey, juncos, pine siskins, flickers, owls, hummingbirds, and more. A bird list is posted at the trailhead.\n\nRecommended by the Olmsted brothers for preservation in 1903, Interlaken's forest and ravines boast remains of the region's original evergreen forest. You can walk the gently inclined paved road or climb one of several steep renovated footpaths. Crossing streams, ravines, and hillsides, these paths with an occasional bench for resting offer good exercise and reward hikers with expansive city views. One primitive side trail joins the road at the corner of 19th Avenue and Interlaken Drive E, with more trails in Boren Park.\n\nThe Friends of Interlaken Park have been working to restore the trails and remove invasive plants such as English ivy, blackberry, and clematis. They request that hikers stick to the main trails and avoid the shortcuts. Separated by lush forest from the traffic of Interlaken Drive E, this hillside greenbelt offers silence and nature study with views over Husky Stadium and the Montlake Cut.\n\nAlthough maps show a continuous greenbelt running west from Washington Park Arboretum (Walk #29) to Volunteer Park, the best walking is from the trailhead at the corner of Interlaken Place E and 21st Avenue E to the junction with Interlaken Drive E. Turn left on the drive and follow the road for 0.5 miles to the historical marker and trailhead for Boren Park. Leave the road and switchback up a shrub- and forest-covered hill to tiny Boren Park with its tall sculpture, benches, and great views.\n\nIf you want to extend your walk, cross 15th Avenue E and enter serene Lake View Cemetery. Perched atop Capitol Hill, with views in all directions, this pioneer cemetery welcomes the public during daylight hours. If the cemetery walk is not your thing, go south a block to Volunteer Park for another mile of strolling.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 2177 E Interlaken Boulevard, Seattle\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 168 (WA 520). Take the Montlake Boulevard exit off WA 520. Turn right onto Montlake Boulevard and go south. It becomes 24th Avenue E. Go 0.5 miles and turn right on Interlaken Boulevard. The trailhead is on the right in about 3 blocks, where the road turns sharply left at 21st Avenue E.\n\n**CONTACT:** Seattle Parks and Recreation, (206) 684-4075, www.seattle.gov\/\u200bparks. For information on volunteering, visit www.greenseattle.org, call (206) 684-8028, or e-mail parksvolunteer@seattle.gov.\n\n**Thank the Visionaries**\n\n**\"We want a ground to which people may easily go after their day's work is done, where they may stroll for an hour, seeing, hearing, and feeling nothing of the bustle and jar of the streets.\" Building upon the words uttered by their father, Frederick Olmsted Sr., in 1870, Frederick Olmsted Jr. and John Olmsted created public parks and boulevards in Seattle at the dawn of the twentieth century. Many of the parks you walk today, including the Washington Park Arboretum and Interlaken, Ravenna, Lincoln, Myrtle Edwards, Discovery, Schmitz Preserve, and Seward Parks owe their existence to the vision and energy of the Olmsted brothers**.\n\n## **31 THE GRAND FOREST**\n\n**Bainbridge Island, 12.5 miles west of Seattle (with ferry ride)**\n\n**_A maze of quiet forest trails in three sections offers bird-watching and streamside solitude in these 240 acres_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **7 miles; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles, horses**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **1.5-mile Forest to Sky Trail to Battle Point Park**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Picnic area, limited parking**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **None**\n\nSoft dirt trails quilt this open forest of Douglas firs in large, easy loops. Silence is broken by the sudden birdlike chatter of the tawny Douglas squirrels that patrol the tree trunks and branches like overzealous guardians of the woods. Three separate areas compose Bainbridge's Grand Forest, acquired from the Department of Natural Resources in 1990.\n\nIn the Mandus Olson block, called Grand Forest East, map signs along the trail with \"You Are Here\" dots help steer you around the loops. If your sense of direction is anything less than that of a migrating bird, you'll be glad they're there. So uniform is this forest that without the guidance of low, slanted sunshine it is easy to get turned around. In the southeastern corner a shallow ravine, a deep cradle of fern and shrub, extends to the east. Elsewhere, the understory shrubbery is low enough to give a clear view of the middle layer of pole-like trunks, characteristic of a farmed forest. Above it all spreads the upper story of Douglas fir boughs. With the openness comes great bird-watching possibilities: easy viewing to the tops of shrubs and a chance to see woodpeckers, nuthatches, and brown creepers on the trunks.\n\nCredit 25\n\nThe Hilltop Trail now connects Grand Forest East to the trail system in the Grand Forest West section off Miller Road, just less than a mile away. Here in the west section you can explore a spiderweb of loops in a denser, more varied forest. Big-leaf maple and red alder mix with Douglas fir and western red cedar, and the eastern part is highlighted by a small stream and surrounding wetland. Two parallel trails lead north and south, with tributary paths joining them. Next to the westernmost one is a picnic table. Huge stumps border the trail, doing their work as nurseries for saplings.\n\nThe third section, known as Grand Forest North, has another 0.8 miles of trail to explore.\n\n**ADDRESS:** Mandus Olson Road and 9752 Miller Road NE, Bainbridge Island\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From the Bainbridge ferry head north out of Winslow on WA 305. To reach the Mandus Olson section, go 1.6 miles north and turn left on Sportsman Club Road. After the school, turn right on New Brooklyn Road. Go 1.3 miles and turn right on Mandus Olson Road. There is limited parking where the road makes a sharp left turn.\n\nTo reach the Miller Road section from New Brooklyn Road westbound, go 0.75 miles and turn right on Miller Road. Just past the Bainbridge Gardens nursery (on the left), at the top of a rise, look on the right for a sign for the Grand Forest. Two pullouts provide limited parking.\n\nFor the Grand Forest North section, there are several trailheads without parking. Head north on Miller Road; the first trailhead is just north of the northern parking area for Grand Forest West. Continue north to Koura Road, where there are a couple more trailheads.\n\n**CONTACT:** Bainbridge Island Metro Park and Recreation District, (206) 842-3343, www.biparks.org\n\n## **32 GAZZAM LAKE NATURE PRESERVE**\n\n**Bainbridge Island, 14 miles west of Seattle (with ferry ride)**\n\n**_445 acres of towering mature forest surrounds placid Gazzam Lake, and trails lead to beaches on Puget Sound_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **6.3 miles; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to moderate**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles, horses; pedestrians only on Peters Trail and Close Property**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Trails lead to Schel Chelb Park and southwest to the shore**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Two small parking areas, information kiosks, trail signs**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **None**\n\nThe buffering effect of near-pristine upland forest shields you from the sound of vehicles and allows the chirping, twittering, and chattering noises of small forest animals to resound. The logging history of the region is revealed in the immense moss-softened stumps, still scarred with ax cuts. The quiet, cushioned earth yields beneath your feet, like walking on the soft belly of Mother Earth. Sword ferns create a green and bushy understory. From either of the two trailheads, the path undulates gently, staying wide, and welcoming you near the edge of 13-acre Gazzam Lake, where a few spur trails lead you to the water's edge. Swallows dive and swoop for mosquito meals, and in summer the native yellow water lilies burst forth. Closed to swimming, boating, and fishing, the lake remains an unspoiled habitat for beavers, muskrats, and river otters.\n\nSouth of the Deerpath Lane parking area, the trail enters an extension of the Gazzam Lake Trail on Peters Property, heading south and downhill to meet the trail leading to Rich Passage. The newer almost 1-mile trail spur, the Gazzam to Veterane Trail, leads west to the sound. Back by the lake, a new spur trail heads up to a ridge. And north of Marshall Road the trail joins the Close Property, a 49-acre addition to the preserve. Well-engineered switchbacks lead down to a secluded beach on Puget Sound. Before the water comes into view, the forest's scent changes from sweet, fresh water to the bite of salt air.\n\n**ADDRESS:** Deerpath Lane NE or 6105 NE Marshall Road, Bainbridge Island\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From the Bainbridge ferry, follow Winslow Way E 0.3 miles and turn right on Madison Avenue N. Take the first left onto Wyatt Way NW. Go 1 mile and turn left on Eagle Harbor Drive NE. Go 0.2 miles and take a slight right onto Bucklin Hill Road NE. This becomes Blakely Avenue NE. Go 1 mile and turn right at NE Baker Hill Road. Go 1.2 miles and turn right on Deerpath Lane NE, where you will find a trailhead on the left. No facilities.\n\nFor the Marshall Road trailhead, proceed as above, but after turning onto Bucklin Hill Road, take the first right (a continuation of Bucklin Hill Road). Go 1 mile and turn left at Fletcher Bay Road, then immediately right onto NE Vincent Road. Go 0.5 miles and turn left on NE Marshall Road. Limited parking.\n\n**CONTACT:** Bainbridge Island Metro Park and Recreation District, (206) 842-3343, www.biparks.org\n\n**Eagle Food, Not Dog Food**\n\n**Dead salmon make a tasty meal for hawks and eagles, but don't let your dog near that carcass. Dead salmon can carry a poison called rickettsia, which is not harmful to birds but can be deadly to dogs**.\n\n## **33 FORT WARD PARK**\n\n**Bainbridge Island, 16 miles west of Seattle (with ferry ride)**\n\n**_Beaches and forest trails on 137 acres provide historic sites, bird-watching, and views of the Olympic Mountains_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **3.3 miles; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles on paved shoreline path only, horses**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **1.25-mile Fort Ward to Blakely Harbor Trail**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, boat launch, campground, gun battery ruins, interpretive signs, picnic tables, underwater park, viewing blinds**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved shore trail (Pleasant Beach Drive), restrooms, picnic area, upper parking lot**\n\nAlthough it was an extensive military holding in the early 1900s, not much remains of the original Fort Ward except the ruins of two gun emplacements. Today, the appeal of this Bainbridge Island park lies in its sylvan tranquility and water's-edge walking, rather than its military history. In the dense second-growth Northwest forest, the ferns and towering big-leaf maples enclose walkers in a green cocoon.\n\nIf you park at the boat launch at the northern end of the gated Pleasant Beach Drive, you can warm up with a stroll along the 4,300-foot paved trail bordering Rich Passage. To one side, sword ferns and horsetail vie for space beneath the hulking limbs of big-leaf maples and western red cedars. By the water, delicate white snowberries and wild roses line the path in late summer. Short spur trails lead to the water's edge and blinds for observing herons, cormorants, loons, and maybe harbor seals.\n\nAt high or low tide, the best walking may be along the almost-mile-long beach, from which you can more easily smell the fresh salt air, watch ferries negotiate the narrow Rich Passage, and observe the antics of the double-crested cormorants as they stretch and preen on the offshore pilings.\n\nAt the southern end of the road, past the bird blind, you can ascend the steep paved trail to the upper picnic area. From here, if the ground is not too muddy, head down the 0.5-mile natural-surface trail back to the lower parking lot where you started. Along the way, you can search the forest trees for Steller's jays and winter wrens. Don't leave the trail, though; poison oak, an uncommon plant in the Northwest, lurks in the undergrowth\u2014green in summer, red in fall.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 2241 Pleasant Beach Drive NE, Bainbridge Island\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From the Bainbridge ferry, head north out of Winslow on WA 305. Go 1 mile and turn left on High School Road. Follow the brown state park signs south. In summer, you can enter the upland picnic area (Fort Ward Hill Road) or the boat launch area (Pleasant Beach Drive). In winter, only the boat launch area is open for parking.\n\n**CONTACT:** Bainbridge Island Metro Park and Recreation District, (206) 842-3343, www.biparks.org\n\n## **34 SCHMITZ PRESERVE PARK**\n\n**4 miles southwest of downtown Seattle**\n\n**_53 acres of old-growth forest reveal Seattle's roots amid birdlife and a small stream_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1.7 miles; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Alki Beach Trail**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Parking lot, interpretive signs**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **None**\n\nTo stroll in Schmitz Preserve in West Seattle is to sense how the Puget Sound region looked before the arrival of the logging mills. Towering, massive western red cedar, western hemlock, and Douglas fir create an ancient ambience all around. Although it is not pristine\u2014nonnative English ivy invades from the neighborhoods, and a few old stumps reveal the ravages of the logger's saw\u2014most of the forest remains untouched.\n\nWalking the fir needle\u2013lined path, you can hear birds singing, calling, moving about, and seeking food. Listen for the tapping of the pileated woodpecker, the largest North American woodpecker, with its bright-red crown, black-and-white neck, and black body. Nuthatches and brown creepers reside here, as does the less frequently seen or heard western screech owl.\n\nAs you meander along a small stream, notice the amount and variety of life that comes from fallen trees. Saplings of alder, hemlock, and Douglas fir send fine roots into the decaying wood of ancient logs. Shrubs, too, such as red huckleberry and salal, find nutrients and moisture in these downed giants. Tall-standing snags house myriad insects that help supply the avian feeders. Removal of this downed wood and stumps would quickly destroy much of the life of the old forest, where the floor is often too thickly covered by needles and leaves to allow young saplings to grow.\n\nFor a more extended walk, stroll Schmitz Boulevard (closed to vehicles) north out of the parking lot. This old paved road leads through a deep ravine under Admiral Way, ending at a neighborhood park and playground.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 5551 SW Admiral Way, Seattle\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5 southbound, take exit 163A (West Seattle Bridge\/Columbian Way) and stay right. From I-5 northbound, take exit 163 (West Seattle Bridge\/Columbian Way) and stay left to get on the West Seattle Bridge. Exit onto SW Admiral Way, following it uphill past a commercial district, then down a hill to SW Stevens Street. Look on the left for the park sign just before crossing a ravine. Turn left on SW Stevens Street, then bear right into the parking lot.\n\n**CONTACT:** Seattle Parks and Recreation Department, (206) 684-4075, www.seattle.gov\/\u200bparks. To volunteer, call (206) 684-8028 or e-mail parksvolunteer@seattle.gov.\n\n**Forest Playground?**\n\n**Downed logs, stumps, and springboard holes are not gymnastics equipment. These dead trees might look big and tough, but they're not. Scrambling feet and grabbing hands break off the moss and bark, which harbor the insects that birds eat. Many young saplings can grow only on nurse logs. Teach your children to respect what has taken a long time to grow but takes only a moment to kill**.\n\n## **35 CAMP LONG**\n\n**5 miles southwest of downtown Seattle**\n\n**_Interpretive trails explore 68 acres of wild forest and ponds; a rock-climbing wall and high ropes invite challenge_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **3.2 miles; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to moderate**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, brochure, camping, classes, maps, picnic shelters, rock climbing, rustic cabins to rent**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Rolling Hills Trail, restrooms, cabins**\n\nWalking in Camp Long is like finding wildlands in West Seattle. The air is fragrant with earth and greenery and sweet forest smells. Although this city park offers overnight camping (the only public camping in Seattle), these 68 acres hold more than cabins and a lodge. They are, for the day hiker, a place of tranquility and adventure. Beginning at the rustic 1940s lodge, walk left past the cabins to the beginning of the Animal Tracks Nature Trail. This 0.5-mile loop leads past ancient cedar stumps to a newer forest of alder and willow. Plaster casts of raccoon, heron, skunk, coyote, red fox, and squirrel tracks are displayed at the trailhead.\n\nThe longer Middle Loop Trail veers off from the nature walk, leading downhill through second-growth forest to the boundary near the golf course. This is a wet trail in winter, but board walkways provide some relief from the mud. Due east of the lodge, you come to Polliwog Pond, where turtles bask, salamanders slither, and water insects hatch. If you're lucky, you may see hawks, owls, or great blue herons.\n\nCredit 29\n\nThe park offers classes on wetlands ecology, forest and pond ecology, and forest dwellers. Special park features include a high ropes challenge course, a climbing rock (on which instruction is given by prearrangement), and the \"glacier,\" a concrete and stone structure with handholds and toeholds for climbing and rappelling.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 5200 35th Avenue SW, Seattle\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5 southbound, take exit 163A (West Seattle Bridge) and stay right. From I-5 northbound, take exit 163 (West Seattle Bridge), and stay left to get on the West Seattle Bridge. Follow it to its end, staying left. At the first light off the freeway, turn left onto 35th Avenue SW. Go 1 mile and turn left on SW Dawson Street to enter the park. Closed Mondays and holidays year-round, as well as Sundays in January.\n\n**CONTACT:** Seattle Parks an Recreation Department, (206) 684-7434, www.seattle.gov\/\u200bparks. To volunteer, call (206) 684-8028 or e-mail parksvolunteer@seattle.gov.\n\n## **36 LINCOLN PARK**\n\n**8 miles southwest of downtown Seattle**\n\n**_Bluffs and beaches along Puget Sound offer views of the Olympic Mountains from this 135-acre park_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **5.3 miles, including 1 mile on a beach; gravel, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic shelters, playgrounds, sports fields, wading pool, swimming pool (summer only)**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved beach walk, restrooms, picnic areas**\n\nFrom high on the bluff at Lincoln Park in West Seattle, the barges and ferries look like large bathtub toys on the smooth water below. Madrona trees arch their vibrant red-barked limbs over the trail, and offshore an eagle may glide. These 135 acres of parkland offer lawns, views, beach, and water's-edge walking.\n\nFrom the parking lots along Fauntleroy Way SW, choose any of the wide, smooth, and graveled paths, and walk west to wander between large old western hemlock and Douglas fir trees. Open lawns and picnic shelters with playgrounds attract many of the park's users, but for a walk, continue west to the bluff. Sloping gently to the south, the paved trail gives views out onto Puget Sound and Vashon Island. Curve around and down to the shore, where fresh breezes from the south stir the water and create waves that clatter the pebbles on the beach.\n\nWide, paved, and level, the mile of beach walk invites either a slow stroll or a heart-pumping power walk. Winter storms bring waves that crash against the seawall and throw mighty drift logs high on the beach. In milder weather, the shoreline begs for exploration. At the northern end, past the swimming pool, the walkway narrows to a seawall under the branches of a slope of mixed conifers, maples, and red alder. Choose a nonthreatening path up (one that slopes rather than climbs) to return to the upper park.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 8011 Fauntleroy Way SW, Seattle\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5 southbound, take exit 163A (West Seattle Bridge\/Columbian Way) and stay right. From I-5 northbound, take exit 163 (West Seattle Bridge\/Columbian Way), and stay left to get on the West Seattle Bridge. Follow it to its end, and continue straight as it becomes Fauntleroy Way SW and curves left. In about 2 miles, the park is on the right.\n\n**CONTACT:** Seattle Parks and Recreation Department, (206) 684-4075, www.seattle.gov\/\u200bparks. To volunteer, call (206) 684-8028 or e-mail parksvolunteer@seattle.gov.\n\n## **37 WESTCREST PARK**\n\n**7 miles south of downtown Seattle**\n\n**_Enjoy mountain and city views, then walk 80 acres of sylvan trails in Seattle's largest forest_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **4.4 miles; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to moderate**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **Off-leash area, otherwise on leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Duwamish Watershed Trail**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic tables, playground, art, community garden**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved trail**\n\nLaid out like a green carpet atop south Seattle, Westcrest Park entices with acres of green lawn, paved trail, and wonderfully innovative playgrounds. But step off the hilltop into the sloping forest of the Duwamish Watershed to the east, and you enter a sylvan land of manicured trails under a canopy of hemlock, fir, and big-leaf maples.\n\nThe original Westcrest Park was wrapped squarely along three sides of the West Seattle Reservoir, but in 2011 the reservoir was lidded, and later these 20 acres were included in the park. Artful renovation and construction, completed in 2015, has turned a reservoir lid into beautiful lawn and paved walkways. The play area is particularly interesting, with a modified zip line and an innovative set of slides to help the smallest walkers descend from the upper lawns to the lower paths. Of aesthetic interest are the airplane-like kinetic sculptures by David Boyer, called _Flyers_. On a clear day you get great views of the Olympics to the west and the Cascades to the east.\n\nThe large dog park attracts the majority of walkers, as there are acres of land for the pups to roam, including a separate small and shy dog enclosure. Once they've run their fill, put the dogs back on leash and enjoy the shaded trails to the east that crisscross through Seattle's largest standing forest, the Duwamish Watershed. Well-maintained trails lead through high-canopy evergreen forest, and trail signs help keep you oriented.\n\n**ADDRESS:** _South parking lot:_ SW Henderson Street, Seattle; _Park location:_ 9000 8th Avenue SW, Seattle\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From WA 99 southbound, merge right onto WA 509. Continue 1.2 miles and take the Myers Way\/White Center exit. Stay right to merge onto Olson Way SW. In 0.4 miles turn right onto SW Roxbury Street. Turn right onto 8th Avenue SW. In 0.2 miles turn right onto SW Henderson Street into the park.\n\nFrom I-5 northbound, take exit 154 (WA 518\/Burien) and head west on WA 518. Go 3.2 miles and exit onto WA 509 toward Seattle. In 1.2 miles turn left onto S 128th Street. Go 0.6 miles and turn right onto 4th Avenue SW. Continue 2 miles and turn left onto SW Roxbury Street and proceed as above.\n\n**CONTACT:** Seattle Parks and Recreation Department, (206) 684-4075, www.seattle.gov\/\u200bparks. Volunteering is welcome.\n\n## **38 LUTHER BURBANK PARK (MERCER ISLAND)**\n\n**Mercer Island, 6 miles southeast of Seattle**\n\n**_A historical setting with 77 acres on Lake Washington offers wetlands, meadows, and unusual art_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **3 miles; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle; some steps to lake**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **Off-leash area, otherwise on leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic areas, boat docks, playground, swimming beach, tennis courts, art**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved trails, restrooms, picnic areas**\n\nYou can almost imagine the vast hand of the Lake Washington spirit reaching over this northeastern corner of Mercer Island and holding back the surrounding suburbia to preserve this stretch of land. With its grassy meadows, neatly tended lawns, pockets of berries, and bogs, Luther Burbank Park offers breathing space and expansive views across the lake to Bellevue and Seattle.\n\nOnce the grounds of a home for wayward Seattle boys, these 77 acres retain a few reminders of days past. Two sturdy brick buildings are all that remain intact of the Boys Parental School (later renamed Luther Burbank School). When you walk north from the building past the elegant poplar and cottonwood trees, stop and explore the ruins of the old barn. For more than 50 years, Holstein cows grazed where boat watchers sit today on the gentle hills of Luther Burbank Park.\n\nAt Calkins Point on the northern tip, a marshland harbors frogs and ducks as well as red-winged blackbirds. Bear right and walk south along the waterfront, past the buildings to the docks, tennis courts, and picnic areas. If you've come with kids, plan on a long pause at the playground. This one was created by someone with a fertile imagination: brick hills to climb, endless slides, and swings\u2014all cushioned with tire chips for safe landings.\n\nWhen you can lure the kids off the brick mountains, head south across the meadow to explore the earth sculpture with its furrows and hills. What a great landscape for make-believe forts or wild games of tag. In summer, the grassy bumps and the nearby beach ring out with the calls of children. Complete the loop with a stroll north again along the water's edge, past secret hideouts for the lake's feathered inhabitants, ending at the docks.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 2040 84th Avenue SE, Mercer Island\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-90 eastbound, take exit 7A (77th Avenue SE). Turn left at the stop sign, go across the freeway, then turn right onto N Mercer Way. Go 0.2 miles and turn left onto 81st Avenue SE. Go to the stop sign and turn right on SE 24th Street. When the road curves right, go left onto 84th Avenue SE into the park.\n\nFrom I-90 westbound, take exit 7 (Island Crest Way). At the top of the ramp, turn right onto SE 26th Street. In 0.1 miles turn left on 84th Avenue SE to enter the park. The park is open from 6:00 a.m. until 10:00 p.m. daily.\n\n**CONTACT:** Mercer Island Parks and Recreation Department, (206) 275-7609, www.mercergov.org. To volunteer, call the volunteer coordinator at (206) 275-7841.\n\n## **39 PIONEER PARK**\n\n**Mercer Island, 8 miles southeast of Seattle**\n\n**_Explore 113 acres of forest on a labyrinth of trails in the island's center_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **5 miles total; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to moderate**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles; horses in southeast section and on Fire Station Trail in northwest section**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **None; guidebook available at Mercer Island Parks office**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Much of perimeter trail of northwest section**\n\nWander a labyrinth of trails through second-growth forest in this touch of wildness in the center of Mercer Island. Raccoons leave footprints on the dirt trails, and squirrels chatter from the branches.\n\nLogged about 75 years ago, the forest now supports a variety of trees, including alder, maple, madrona, western hemlock, and Douglas fir. Many have English ivy (an unwanted volunteer from nearby homes) clinging to their trunks like shaggy blankets or display a fine coating of blue-green lichen on their northern sides.\n\nPark on Island Crest Way near SE 68th Street and dive in. Trails meander through each of the three sections of the park, which intersect at SE 68th Street and Island Crest Way. You can choose the company of horses (in the northwest and southeast sections) or not and choose level (northeast section) or sloping (southeast section) land. With many kid-created side trails, you could possibly get lost, or at least end up in someone's backyard. To maintain your bearings, listen for the traffic on Island Crest Way, and in the southeast section remember that uphill leads to the west and Island Crest Way.\n\nTry a winter walk here, when the cold has hardened the dirt trails. With the leaves gone, you can look out through the sinewy forms of naked branches to Lake Washington. Oregon grape, sword ferns, cedars, and hemlocks all shimmer in vibrant green against the browns and grays of winter bark.\n\n**ADDRESS:** SE 68th Street and Island Crest Way, Mercer Island\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-90 eastbound, take exit 7B (Island Crest Way). The ramp leads directly onto Island Crest Way southbound. Go about 3 miles, and park at the ball fields on the west side of Island Crest Way at about SE 63rd Street. Limited on-road parking only.\n\nFrom I-90 westbound, take exit 7 (Island Crest Way). Turn left at the top of the ramp and cross the freeway. Go straight onto Island Crest Way southbound, and proceed as above.\n\n**CONTACT:** Mercer Island Parks and Recreation Department, (206) 275-7609, www.mercergov.org. To volunteer, call the volunteer coordinator at (206) 275-7841.\n\n## **40 SEWARD PARK**\n\n**6 miles southeast of downtown Seattle**\n\n**_Old-growth forest abounding with birds and beaches along Lake Washington's shoreline offers views of the Cascades from this 299-acre park_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **5.7 miles; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles on paved loop only**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Lake Washington Boulevard**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, amphitheater, art studio, playground, fishing pier, interpretive center, picnic shelters**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved trail, restrooms, picnic shelters**\n\nSeattle's largest tract of old-growth forest crowns thumb-shaped Bailey Peninsula, jutting into Lake Washington. Acquired by the city in 1911 as an island, Seward Park was transformed into a peninsula when the lake receded as a result of the building of the ship canal in 1916.\n\nDeep in this forest of immense precolonial western red cedar, western hemlock, and Douglas fir, varied thrushes call in winter, and in spring the forest comes alive with mating songs and calls of the migrant warblers and kinglets. No city sounds impinge on this woodland with its varied undergrowth of sword fern, Oregon grape, thimbleberry, salal, and twinberry. The main trail follows the spine of the gentle ridge, with numerous side trails leading out of the forest to the lakeshore loop walk.\n\nThe forest trail and the shore are so different that it's hard to believe they're part of the same park. From the quiet tranquility of the old forest, you emerge to a faster-moving world. On the paved 2.6-mile shore loop, bicycles zoom by, and the in-line skaters skate-dance to music from their headphones. But with grassy stretches on either side of the trail, there is plenty of room for everyone. In summer the beaches ring with the calls of children, and colorful kayaks can be seen on the calm water.\n\nIn fall, the southern part of the shore trail is lined in orange and red feathery sumac, salal, and hedges of snowberries, and the maples flash warm orange and yellow colors against the blue of the lake. Poison oak lurks among the shrubbery; look for its distinctive leaves in sets of three, shiny green in summer and turning red in fall. Tall madrona trees with their beautiful peeling bark accent the trail edges. Standing on the lakeshore in winter, you may see a variety of wintering waterfowl such as mergansers, grebes, and wigeons.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 5900 Lake Washington Boulevard S, Seattle\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5 southbound, take exit 163A (Columbian Way) and stay left to cross the freeway onto Columbian Way. If northbound, take exit 163 and stay right to get on Columbian Way. Go southeast 1.4 miles and turn right on Beacon Avenue S. Go about 0.5 miles and turn left on S Orcas Street. Head east and at the T-junction at Lake Washington Boulevard S, turn right, then immediately left into the park.\n\n**CONTACT:** Seattle Parks and Recreation Department, (206) 684-4396, www.seattle.gov\/\u200bparks. For information on volunteering, visit the Friends of Seward Park website: www.sewardpark.org.\n\n## **41 KUBOTA GARDEN**\n\n**7 miles southeast of downtown Seattle**\n\n**_This 34-acre Japanese garden features a stream, ponds, native and ornamental plants, and art_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1.5 miles total; gravel, natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **Not allowed**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, gardens, benches, free guided tours on weekends (except in winter), map, picnic tables**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Some paths**\n\nThis public garden, featuring exotic plants, walkways wide and narrow, waterfalls, and ponds is a place for meditation and quiet strolls. Pleasure comes not only from the visual but from the almost tactile sense of shape and design.\n\nOriginally a nursery of 20 acres surrounding an ambitious system of streams and waterfalls, and later passed on to Seattle by the Kubota family, the garden continues to provide a place of beauty through form and color, texture and fragrance. Labeling plants was not a priority of the Kubotas, nor is it now. Mature rhododendrons\u2014some 15 feet high and of unknown lineage\u2014bloom in spring, livening the garden with robust color. Migrating songbirds find refuge here, filling the air with their calls. Japanese red and black pines and both yellow and black bamboo grace the paths.\n\nThis is a garden for meandering, for viewing from all directions. You may have passed the arched Moon Bridge before, but now you tilt your head another way, the sun has dropped lower, and the garden reveals yet another aspect of color, texture, or shape. Climb the \"Mountainside\" to enjoy territorial views and perhaps to watch the golden carp in the Necklace of Ponds, 65 feet below. Experience the garden in all seasons and watch the colors and textures change.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 9817 55th Avenue S, Seattle\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5 southbound, take exit 158 (Boeing Access Road). Turn left to cross the freeway and head straight up S Ryan Way. At the T-junction, turn left on 51st Avenue S. Turn right on Renton Avenue S, then right on 55th Avenue S. The parking entrance is on the right.\n\nFrom I-5 northbound, take exit 157 (Martin Luther King Jr. Way). Follow Martin Luther King Jr. Way to S Ryan Way, turn right, and proceed as above.\n\n**CONTACT:** Kubota Garden Foundation, (206) 725-5060, www.kubotagarden.org; Seattle Parks and Recreation Department, (206) 684-4584, www.seattle.gov\/\u200bparks. Volunteering is welcome.\n\n# **EASTSIDE**\n\n# **Bellevue, Redmond, and Issaquah**\n\n**42** Sammamish River Trail\n\n**43** Gold Creek Park\n\n**44** Saint Edward State Park\n\n**45** Big Finn Hill Park\n\n**46** O. O. Denny Park\n\n**47** Juanita Bay Park\n\n**48** Puget Power Trail\n\n**49** Farrel-McWhirter Farm Park\n\n**50** Watershed Preserve (Redmond)\n\n**51** Watershed Park (Kirkland)\n\n**52** Bridle Trails State Park\n\n**53** Marymoor Park\n\n**54** Ardmore Park\n\n**55** Evans Creek Preserve\n\n**56** Bellevue Botanical Garden and Wilburton Hill Park\n\n**57** Kelsey Creek Park\n\n**58** Lake Hills Greenbelt\n\n**59** Mercer Slough Nature Park\n\n**60** Robinswood Park\n\n**61** Weowna Park\n\n**62** Soaring Eagle Regional Park\n\n**63** Hazel Wolf Wetlands Preserve\n\n**64** Beaver Lake Preserve\n\n**65** Beaver Lake Park\n\n**66** Coal Creek Natural Area\n\n**67** Lewis Creek Park\n\n**68** Lakemont Community Park\n\n**69** Cougar Mountain Regional Wildland Park\n\n**70** Squak Mountain State Park\n\n**71** Lake Sammamish State Park\n\n**72** Tiger Mountain\n\n## **42 SAMMAMISH RIVER TRAIL**\n\n**Bothell, 13 miles northwest of Bellevue, to Redmond, 6 miles northeast of Bellevue**\n\n**_Walk or jog the Sammamish Slough's meadows and wetlands, with their wood sculptures and Cascade views_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **9.4 miles one way; paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles, horses**  \n**DOGS** | **Off-leash area in Marymoor Park, otherwise leash and scoop**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Burke-Gilman Trail (Walk #25), Puget Power Trail (Walk #48), Marymoor Park (Walk #53)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic shelters, playing fields at various parks**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Trail, restrooms**\n\nAlong this ribbon of still-rural Washington just minutes off I-405 and WA 520, you'll find miles and miles of walking opportunity. Listen to the soft murmur of water, and inhale the clean air of the countryside. In Redmond the trail borders Haida House, the studio of Dudley Carter, late artist in residence for King County, whose huge wood sculptures can be seen both there and at nearby Marymoor Park. Farther north, near 124th Street, you pass close to the Chateau Ste. Michelle winery, where a free tour may lure you in from the walk.\n\nThe trail follows the grassy banks of the gently flowing Sammamish River, which connects Lake Sammamish to Lake Washington. Although surrounded to the east and west by the creeping spread of suburbia and light industry, parts of the trail still retain a rural feel.\n\nOn sunny days, the trail is host to a bevy of bicyclists, joggers, and equestrians, many of whom make the entire 9-mile jaunt between Redmond and Bothell. If the bicycle traffic alarms you, try walking on the soft dirt trail beside the pavement. On the asphalt, stay to the right and be prepared for the call of \"Passing\" or \"On your left\" as the bicycles zoom by.\n\nIf you choose to walk midweek or on rainy days, you're likely to find yourself talking instead to the flocks of gulls splashing in the flooded fields, or exchanging greetings with hooded mergansers in winter or the fluffy Canada goslings in spring.\n\n**ADDRESS:** _Park at Bothell Landing:_ 9919 NE 180th Street, Bothell; _Marymoor Park:_ 6046 W Lake Sammamish Parkway NE, Redmond\n\n**GETTING THERE:** _Park at Bothell Landing:_ From I-5 northbound, take exit 171 (WA 522\/ Bothell\/Lake City Way) and drive north 9.3 miles. In Bothell turn right on NE 180th Street into the Park at Bothell Landing.\n\nFrom I-405 northbound take exit 23, or 23B from southbound (WA 522 W\/Bothell). Head west on WA 522 for 6.5 miles toward Bothell\/Kenmore, and turn left on NE 180th Street into the Park at Bothell Landing.\n\n_Marymoor Park:_ See Walk #53 for directions. As you enter the park on the western side you will see the paved trail to your left, before crossing the river. A small parking fee applies.\n\n**CONTACT:** King County Parks, (206) 477-4527, www.kingcounty.gov\/\u200brecreation\/\u200bparks\n\n**Nasty Nettle or Yummy Veggie?**\n\n**Nettles make a tasty vegetable, rich in vitamins, if cut young and steamed up for supper. But most of us meet them on the trail\u2014on a tender bit of leg or arm. When brushed, the plant's little hairs break off, injecting formic acid\u2014the same stuff we hate to get from biting ants. Baking soda will help neutralize the sting. But natural antidotes? Some say rubbing the brown spores of the sword fern on the spot helps. Others say the juice from the stem of wild impatiens (jewelweed) does the trick. If you don't normally have any baking soda with you, try rubbing with one of these plants. It might work. Native Americans used to flail themselves with stinging nettle to stay awake while out fishing all night on the Sound. Ouch!**\n\n## **43 GOLD CREEK PARK**\n\n**Woodinville, 12 miles north of Bellevue**\n\n**_Shaded forest trails make a good dry-weather workout through 35 acres above a peaceful creek_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **2.8 miles total; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Horses**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Picnic area, restrooms, lodge, map sign**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **None**\n\nAt first glance, this secluded county park with its stream and picnic area appears to offer nothing for a walker. But hidden behind a mantle of blackberries, a well-used trail climbs a forested ravine alongside Gold Creek.\n\nThe trail-map sign, drawn by a Boy Scout for his Eagle project, shows two loops, one north and the other south. Both begin with a steep climb up the edge of Gold Creek in quiet woods. The year-round creek gives moisture to the air, increasing the rich scent of humus and greenery. The trails in this park are used equally by walkers and horses, so they tend to be narrow, rough, and in places worn into ruts by hooves. Always be aware that you might be sharing the trail with riders; step aside and let them pass.\n\nFor the south loop, take the first trail to the right, as it switches back higher on the hillside. Rising to a ridge, you leave the forest cover for a moment to touch the edge of suburbia, and then dive back into the green shelter like that which used to cover most of the Eastside 40 or 50 years ago before the housing developments came. Now on the north loop trail, you descend past Douglas firs and western red cedars up to 2 feet in diameter. Here downed logs and open glens invite a rest or picnic.\n\nThroughout, the trail is steep, rising and falling on the contours of the west-sloping hill. This is a great training walk, or one to challenge your children. A mossy fence marks the northern park boundary. Descend finally to the Gold Creek streambed and return to the trailhead.\n\nIn this swatch of wildness there are few landmarks, except your memory of going along the edge of a ravine or a particularly steep hillside. Heading down, on any trail, should eventually return you to the trailhead.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 16020 148th Avenue NE, Woodinville\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-405 northbound, take exit 20B (NE 124th Street). Turn right on NE 124th Street. Go 2.5 miles and turn left on Highway 202 (Woodinville\/Redmond Road NE). Go straight for 1.5 miles. At a four-way stop go straight onto 148th Avenue NE. After 0.5 miles continue straight to stay on 148th Avenue NE. The park is 0.25 miles ahead on the right.\n\nFrom I-405 southbound, take exit 23A (WA 522 E to WA 202, Woodinville, Monroe), staying left to merge onto WA 522. Take the Woodinville\/Redmond exit. At the end of the ramp, turn right. Go straight and turn left on NE 175th Street. Turn right on 140th Avenue NE, go about 1.5 miles, and look for 148th Avenue NE merging on the left. Take a sharp left (almost a U-turn) onto 148th Avenue NE and go 0.25 miles uphill to the park on the right.\n\n**CONTACT:** King County Parks, (206) 477-4527, www.kingcounty.gov\/\u200brecreation\/\u200bparks\n\n## **44 SAINT EDWARD STATE PARK**\n\n**Kenmore, 12 miles northwest of Bellevue**\n\n**_Wander 316 acres of forested ravines and follow a stream flowing down to 3,000 feet of shoreline on Lake Washington_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **7.5 miles total; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Moderate to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles prohibited (except on one trail); horses in southeast corner**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Big Finn Hill Park (Walk #45)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic areas, playing fields, swimming pool, tennis and racquetball courts, trail-map sign, gardens**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved trail around buildings, restrooms, buildings**\n\nDeep ravines cutting through a forest of mixed conifer, madrona, and big-leaf maple characterize this 316-acre park, the largest piece of undeveloped property on Lake Washington. Coyotes roam the grounds in early evening, and bald eagles often nest along the shoreline. The woodlands provide shelter for many foraging and upper-canopy birds, and red-tailed hawks cruise the open edges of the meadow. Waterfowl on the lakefront include grebes, geese, and all the native ducks.\n\nWith the parking lot on a rise high above the lake, the trails in Saint Edward are among the steepest found in the region. If the narrow leaf-strewn trails on hillsides daunt you, use the wide, gently graded Seminary Trail to reach the grassy \"beach\" on the waterfront. For more of a challenge, try the North Trail, which traverses a densely wooded hillside above a stream. Look here for white three-petaled trillium blooming in the spring. If you want to increase your aerobic exercise, return via the Grotto Trail: it's a strenuous but beautiful climb overlooking the graceful curve of a fern-draped grotto where weddings are often held.\n\nScattered among the hemlock, cedar, and Oregon ash, you'll see massive stumps with springboard notches cut more than 75 years ago. Look along the shoreline for rusted chains entangling many fallen trees. These are all that remain of the log boom once moored offshore.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 14445 Juanita Drive NE, Kenmore\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-405 northbound, take exit 20A (NE 116th Street). Turn left on NE 116th Street and go 1.5 miles to the light at 100th Avenue NW. Go straight through the light onto Juanita Drive NE. Go about 4 miles and, at the top of the hill, turn left into the park. At the fork, bear right and go up the hill to the parking lot. A Discover Pass is required for parking.\n\nFrom I-5, take exit 171 (WA 522) and continue north over the top of Lake Washington. Turn south on 68th Avenue NE, which becomes Juanita Drive NE. Go 1.75 miles to the park entrance on your right and proceed as above.\n\n**CONTACT:** Washington State Parks, (425) 823-2992, www.parks.wa.gov\n\nCredit 35\n\n## **45 BIG FINN HILL PARK**\n\n**Kirkland, 8 miles north of Bellevue**\n\n**_Wander past wetlands and ball fields into forested ravines in this 220-acre park_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **9.5 miles; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to moderate**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Saint Edward State Park (Walk #44) and O. O. Denny Park (Walk #46)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic tables, playground, interpretive signs, ball fields**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **None**\n\nStroll along the low banks of the headwaters of Denny Creek. Listen to the sound of Pacific tree frogs near the pond. If the ground is saturated, you may choose to walk the gated service road that cuts the park from east to west, or on drier days, hike the natural trail cushioned with needles from the Douglas fir and western hemlock. Nurse stumps throughout the forest provide nutrients for huckleberry and salal. Like other second-growth forests in Western Washington, the trees of Big Finn Hill hide many mysteries of the past. Walking along the edge of the headwaters of Denny Creek, you'll see large stumps with rectangular slashes cut in their sides. These springboard notches are evidence of logging here about a century ago. Many of the stumps are burned from a long-ago fire. An orchard and remnants of a residence give further clues to the past use of this forested hillside. Nonnative birch trees might have flanked the entrance to the homestead entrance. Whether the homesteaders logged then burned the forest or their residence burned we may never know.\n\nIn spring this park buzzes with the cheers and calls of dozens of softball and baseball teams, and parking can be problematic. But most of the year the park provides open lawns for picnics, a bright playground area, and the richly scented western red cedar and Douglas fir forest. Wooden footbridges and an interpretive brochure have been created by Lake Washington School District's Environmental and Adventure School in conjunction with King County.\n\nTo get to the western half of the park, you have to cross Juanita Drive without a crosswalk, but here you'll find older forest, huge madrona trees, and more miles of trail. To the north, you can connect to the extensive trail system of Saint Edward State Park, and to the south and west, smaller trails lead down Denny Creek to O. O. Denny Park and Lake Washington. On weekends and after school hours bike riders hit the trails, so choose another walking time or keep dogs and children close at hand, and be alert to the silent wheels.\n\n**ADDRESS:** NE 138th Street and Juanita Drive, Kirkland\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-405 northbound, take exit 20A (NE 116th Street). Turn left on NE 116th Street and go 1.5 miles to the light at 100th Avenue NW. Go straight through the light onto Juanita Drive NE. Go about 3 miles and turn right into the park.\n\nFrom I-5, take exit 171 (WA 522) and continue north over the top of Lake Washington. Turn south on 68th Avenue NE, which becomes Juanita Drive NE. Go 2.4 miles to the park entrance on your left.\n\n**CONTACT:** King County Parks, (206) 477-4527, www.kingcounty.gov\/\u200brecreation\/\u200bparks\n\n## **46 O. O. DENNY PARK**\n\n**Kirkland, 11 miles northwest of Bellevue**\n\n**_Denny Creek flows through 46 acres of mature forest to a popular Lake Washington beach_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1-mile loop; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Moderate to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Via neighborhood streets: Big Finn Hill Park (Walk #45)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, beach, picnic shelter**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Restrooms, beach area**\n\nFollow the contours of a ridge above Denny Creek in dense western red cedar and western hemlock stands. Sword ferns create a tufted carpet of undergrowth to hide mice, voles, and shrews. This forest of century-old trees is much as it might have been when Seattle developer O. O. Denny stepped ashore to survey the land for a homesite in the early 1900s.\n\nTo reach the forest trailhead, cross the road and start up the forest path to the right of the parking lot. The trail climbs steeply high above the ravine formed by the creek. At the top of the ridge, a graveled road intersects the trail. Turn around here or go left, through a small clearing past a pump house.\n\nIn summer you may see berry-rich scat lying on the ground at frequent intervals. Not cat, bear, dog, or deer. Coyote. These carnivores turn into berry eaters when other food is scarce or when berries are easy to forage. In the sunny patches on this western sloping hill, the salal and blackberries are abundant.\n\nTo complete the loop, cross the wooden bridge with interpretive signs, and descend into the Denny Creek ravine. Marvelous cedar and Douglas fir stumps hint at the past majesty of this forest. Members of the Finn Hill Alliance help maintain and improve this precious enclave of old forest.\n\nOn the beach side of the park, the creek has gouged an impressive ravine in its last push to the Sound. Stroll the grassy lawns, enjoy views of Mount Rainier, and watch for bald eagles overhead.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 12032 Holmes Point Drive NE, Kirkland\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-405 northbound, take exit 20A (NE 116th Street) and turn left on NE 116th Street. Go 1.4 miles to the light at 100th Avenue NW. Go straight through the light onto Juanita Drive NE. Go another 2 miles and turn left on 76th Place NE, which becomes Holmes Point Drive NE. Look for the park after 1 mile.\n\nFrom I-405 southbound, take exit 20 (NE 124th Street). Turn right at the end of the ramp, and get in the left lane. Turn left at the first light onto 120th Avenue NE. Turn right on NE 116th Street and proceed as above.\n\n**CONTACT:** Kirkland Parks and Community Services Department, (425) 587-3300, www.kirklandwa.gov\/\u200bdepart\/\u200bparks.htm. To volunteer, contact www.finnhillalliance.org\n\n## **47 JUANITA BAY PARK**\n\n**Kirkland, 8 miles north of Bellevue**\n\n**_Boardwalks traverse 110 acres of wetlands along Lake Washington amid waterfowl and beaver ponds_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1.3 miles; boardwalk, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, interpretive signs, nature tours, picnic tables**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **All trails, restrooms**\n\nAn apron of green lawn spreads out from the streets of suburbia, creating an elegant separation between the man-made and the natural. Below the lawns, hidden from casual view, are boardwalks that meander into natural marshes where blackbirds nest, turtles sun, frogs leap, and cattails sway in lakeside breezes.\n\nThis corner of Lake Washington has had a long and active past. Native Americans gathered food here on the shores of the once-higher lake. Later came the frog farmers and the truck gardeners, both working with the land and lake as it was. In 1932 a Kirkland real estate agent began an onslaught against nature by dumping thousands of truckloads of cedar bark, sawdust, and dirt to fill in the marshes and build a golf course. But the inexorable water won out, and despite berms and pumps, the course was finally closed in 1975.\n\nSlowly, now, the lake reclaims its shaggy marsh shoreline. You can observe this wetland either from the broad paved causeway on the eastern edge of the lake or from the boardwalks that wend their way into the thickets of cattails and reeds. Here you may see mallards and teals dabbling, mergansers diving, or beavers gliding across their carefully crafted ponds.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 2201 Market Street, Kirkland\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-405 northbound, take exit 20A (NE 116th Street). Turn left on NE 116th Street and go about 1.5 miles. Turn left (south) on 98th Avenue NE (which becomes Market Street), bordering the park. Turn right into the parking lot.\n\nFrom I-405 southbound, take exit 20 (NE 124th Street). Turn right at the end of the ramp, and get in the left lane. Turn left onto 100th Avenue NE, which becomes 98th Avenue NE, which becomes Market Street. The park and parking lot are on the right.\n\n**CONTACT:** Kirkland Parks and Community Services Department, (425) 587-3300, www.kirklandwa.gov\/\u200bdepart\/\u200bparks.htm\n\n## **48 PUGET POWER TRAIL**\n\n**Redmond, 10 miles northeast of Bellevue**\n\n**_Meadows, rolling hills, and Cascade views merge into forest along Bear Creek_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **3 miles one way; gravel, natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles, horses**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Sammamish River Trail (Walk #42), Farrel-McWhirter Farm Park (Walk #49), Watershed Preserve (Walk #50)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **None**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **None**\n\nJust north of downtown Redmond, this rugged stretch of green space is appealing for its ups and downs, bushes alive with birds, and striking views of the Cascades.\n\nIf walking under power lines is not your idea of fun, forget this trail. But perhaps you can play mental games to imagine these towering structures as some sort of 1950s _War of the Worlds_ creatures or go into engineering bliss imagining the equations necessary to erect them. Or maybe, like the wildlife that frequents these corridors of steel and wire, you can ignore them. As you walk along the trail, look for scat and telltale footprints in mud. As for larger mammals, this corridor that stretches from the Sammamish River to Farrel-McWhirter Farm Park (Walk #49) boasts coyotes, raccoons, possums, deer, and lynx.\n\nAt the western end, the trail is accessible only from the Sammamish River Trail (Walk #42), between 60 Acres Park (off NE 116th Street) and downtown Redmond (off NE 85th Street near the city offices). As it heads east, the trail varies in its surroundings, sometimes following country roads, at other times bordering neighborhoods and backyards. There are several street crossings; be cautious at Redmond-Woodinville Road, which has a crossing light. For much of the trail, you walk in a narrow greenbelt of Scotch broom, blackberry, salmonberry, and horsetail. (Sometimes real horse tails, too, as you pass the fence of a friendly equine.)\n\nAfter crossing Avondale Road (use the stoplight), the trail enters quiet second-growth forest, where evidence of long-ago logging shows in springboard slots on the moss-covered stumps. This is the more peaceful, magical end of the trail, with a soft, fir-needled path underfoot, a bridge over Bear Creek, and in spring, the pinkish floral bells of salal. The trail's east end is easily accessed at Farrel-McWhirter Farm Park (Walk #49).\n\nFrom Farrell-McWhirter east, the trail passes through more forest and wetland until it passes Redmond's Watershed Preserve (Walk #50). From there the trail is a wetland for much of the year. Where you turn around depends on your time and mood. The trail is great for power walks and training but also for quiet contemplation. You might decide to set your sights on a certain street crossing. But be warned: there's always the lure of another Cascades view to draw you onward.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 10403 Woodinville-Redmond Road NE. Trail crossing only. See connecting trails.\n\n**GETTING THERE:** _60 Acres Park:_ From I-405 northbound, take exit 20 (NE 124th Street). From I-405 southbound, take exit 20B (NE 124th Street). Go east on NE 124th Street about 1.5 miles and turn right on Willow Road NE. Go 1.5 miles and turn left on NE 116th Street. Once you cross the Sammamish Slough, park at 60 Acres Park. Walk south on the Sammamish River Trail about 0.5 miles, looking for the power lines and the sign for the Puget Power Trail on your left.\n\n_Farrell-McWhirter Farm Park:_ See Walk #49 for directions.\n\n**CONTACT:** Redmond Parks and Recreation Department, (425) 556-2300, www.ci.redmond.wa.us\/\u200bparksrecreation\n\n## **49 FARREL-MCWHIRTER FARM PARK**\n\n**Redmond, 10 miles northeast of Bellevue**\n\n**_Mackey Creek bisects 68 acres of mature forest and fields full of farm animals_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **2 miles total; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles on paved surfaces, horses on the Perimeter Loop Trail**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Puget Power Trail (Walk #48)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, classes, horse arena, orienteering course, picnic shelters, playground**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved trail, restrooms (via gravel area), buildings**\n\nBeyond the seductive green lawn, the picnic area, and the farm animals lies an inviting swath of mature (nearly 100-year-old) forest. Wide natural trails form a loop inside the park for walkers, while horseback riders are confined to the outer trail and arena area.\n\nCool, shallow Mackey Creek bisects the park\u2014open spaces to the south, forest to the north. In summer, day campers study the flora and fauna of the forest and stream habitat and learn to care for the rabbits, goats, pigs, ponies, ducks, and chickens.\n\nTo explore the forest, bid adieu to the animals and head north on paved Charlotte's Trail, then turn right into the forest on the wide soft-surfaced Upland Loop Trail. Wander under stately Douglas fir and inhale the spicy scent of western red cedar. In spring, orange and yellow salmonberries and white trillium punctuate the lush greenery, and white blackberry flowers promise sweet fruits for summer. Look for evidence of deer, and listen for the shriek of the red-tailed hawk high overhead.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 19483 Redmond Road, Redmond\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-405, take exit 14 (WA 520\/Redmond) east, and merge onto Avondale Road. Go about 1 mile, and turn right on Novelty Hill Road. Go 0.25 miles and turn left on Redmond Road. Go 0.5 miles and turn left into the park.\n\nFrom I-5, take exit 168B (WA 520, Bellevue) across Lake Washington. Continue east on WA 520, and proceed as above.\n\n**CONTACT:** Redmond Parks and Recreation Department, (425) 556-2300, www.ci.redmond.wa.us\/\u200bparksrecreation\n\n**Tree of Life**\n\n**Native Americans had so many uses for the western red cedar that they called it the \"tree of life.\" The wood made logs for houses, canoes, and household items. From the bark, they wove baskets and clothing. The needles made a natural insect repellent. The shredded bark served as diapers. Many Native Americans believed that leaning your back against the trunk infused strength**.\n\n## **50 WATERSHED PRESERVE**\n\n**Redmond, 11 miles northeast of Bellevue**\n\n**_800 acres of forest, wetlands, and Seidel Creek create habitat for many animals and birds_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **7.5 miles total; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to moderate**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles on multiuse trail, horses**  \n**DOGS** | **Not permitted**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Puget Power Trail (Walk #48), Tolt Pipeline Trail**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, interpretive trail, maps**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Treefrog Loop interpretive trail, restrooms**\n\nStroll the wetlands and ridges of richly scented forest in one of the Eastside's premier natural preserves. Crossed by streams and highlighted by fir- and maple-covered ridges and fern-filled ravines, this preserve is home to black-tailed deer, beavers, wood ducks, and playful, chattering Douglas squirrels. Close observers may see signs of black bears, and possibly coyotes and cougars.\n\nJust minutes from WA 520, you can choose the short (0.3-mile) paved Treefrog Loop Trail with interpretive signs and benches by a beaver pond, or a heartier walk along the Siler's Mill Trail or Trillium Trail above the Seidel Creek ravine for a total of more than 5 miles.\n\nThere are two entrances to the park, and two regional trails cross the preserve: the Puget Power Trail (Walk #48), running east and west, is accessed at the preserve's southern entrance, and the Tolt Pipeline Trail, running north and south, is accessed at either the southern or northern entrance. These two multiuse trails add more than 4 miles of access for cyclists, hikers, and equestrians alike. Trails are clearly signposted for usage: multiuse, equestrian (which also allow hikers), or hikers only.\n\nThese sloping forests and wetlands were purchased from the Weyerhaeuser corporation in the 1920s and 1940s with the goal of creating a new water supply for the city of Redmond. But water quality never met state standards, and the land came up for use proposals ranging from an airport to a golf course to commercial development. In 1989 the City of Redmond began restoring habitat and establishing a systematic network of trails; in 1997 the preserve was dedicated.\n\nBecause of the sensitive nature of the wetlands and almost 100-year-old forest, pets of all kinds are prohibited within the preserve.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 21760 Novelty Hill Road, Redmond\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-405, take exit 14 (WA 520\/Redmond) east to its end at Avondale Road. Continue straight on Avondale Road, and after 1.25 miles turn right on Novelty Hill Road. Drive 2.4 miles to 218th Avenue NE. The Watershed Preserve parking area is on the left.\n\nFrom I-5, take exit 168B (WA 520\/Bellevue) across Lake Washington. Continue east on WA 520 to its end at Avondale Road, and proceed as above.\n\n**CONTACT:** Redmond Parks and Recreation Department, (425) 556-2300, www.ci.redmond.wa.us\/\u200bparksrecreation\n\n## **51 WATERSHED PARK (KIRKLAND)**\n\n**Kirkland, 3.5 miles north of Bellevue**\n\n**_A meadow has Mount Rainier views, and the forested ravine hides a stream in this 73-acre park_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **2.8 miles total; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles allowed but pedestrians only preferred**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Interpretive tours**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **None**\n\nSunlight traces dancing pictures on the path. Bird calls and songs lilt from one tree to another. Mount Rainier stands tall above a valley of yellow Scotch broom. A clear pool quenches the thirst of a family of coyotes. And all of this is just minutes from both Kirkland and Bellevue.\n\nFrom the 1930s to the late 1960s, a small reservoir in the watershed was built to supply Kirkland's water needs, but the system had too many leaks, and in 1967 Kirkland hooked up with Seattle for water. Today all that remain of this human effort are an empty reservoir and a few pipes partially buried beneath bracken and sword ferns.\n\nFor easy walking, follow the chip-lined paths from the 114th Avenue entrance in a long loop at the eastern edge of the forest, where rufous-sided towhees and Bewick's wrens hop about on the forest floor and in the branches of the madrona and maple trees. At the southern end, you come to a ridge above a Scotch broom\u2013filled valley, carved out 35 years ago for gravel to build I-405. A sandy footpath that dips down into the valley makes another appealing walking loop.\n\nFrom the 112th Avenue entrance, a steep but well-maintained trail heads west, sloping down and around old stumps and seedling-covered nurse logs. Follow the path into the ravine. Here, less freeway noise intrudes on the forest sounds, and soon the sound of the stream dominates. In the quiet, clear pool, shadows of minnows pattern the sandy bottom.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 4500 110th Avenue NE, Kirkland\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-405, take exit 14 (WA 520\/Seattle) west, and exit immediately onto 108th Avenue NE. Go about 1 mile north, turn right on NE 45th Street, and continue until you reach 110th Avenue NE where you can park on the street. Alternatively, continue farther north on 108th Avenue NE and turn right onto NE 53rd Street, then turn right on either 112th Avenue NE or 114th Avenue NE and park at the end of the street; it's on-street parking in any case.\n\nFrom I-5, take exit 168B (WA 520\/Bellevue) across Lake Washington. Take the Kirkland (Lake Washington Boulevard NE) exit. Turn left at the end of the ramp, cross the freeway, and turn right on Northup Way. At the next light, turn left on 108th Avenue NE and proceed as above.\n\n**CONTACT:** Kirkland Parks and Community Services Department, (425) 587-3300, www.kirklandwa.gov\/\u200bdepart\/\u200bparks.htm\n\n## **52 BRIDLE TRAILS STATE PARK**\n\n**Kirkland, 5.5 miles north of Bellevue**\n\n**_Hikers and horseback riders can wander miles of trails through 482 acres of mature forest_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **About 28 miles total; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to moderate**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Horses (which do have right of way)**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Bridle Crest Trail (many road crossings)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, interpretive trail, picnic area, posted map, show ring, arena**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Restrooms, picnic area**\n\nYou may not see the Douglas squirrels chomp on fir cones as though they were corn on the cob, but walking through this almost 100-year-old forest, you are likely to see many piles of discarded scales. Though only a mile from the freeway and the urban centers of Kirkland and Bellevue, this enclave of mature forest is a habitat for coyotes, raccoons, possums, native squirrels, and dozens of species of forest-dwelling birds.\n\nIt is like home, too, to many horseback riders, who regularly exercise their steeds on the more than 28 miles of natural-surface trails. When the state acquired the land in the 1930s, it soon became overrun by locals who thought of it as their private drag strip for cars and motorcycles. A neighborhood group formed, later becoming the Lake Washington Saddle Club, and took on the role of forest guardian. In the 1940s, members cleared the trails and built the show ring. Today Washington State and the club cooperate in maintaining the park, which is welcoming to both hikers and horses.\n\nEntering by the big arena on 116th Avenue NE, take the 1.7-mile interpretive Trillium Trail heading up the gentle hill to the east, which quickly puts you under canopies of fir and hemlock that soon muffle the freeway noise. After a good rain, you'll find a few deep mudholes, so wear appropriate shoes. If the weather has been dry, you can probably negotiate the edges of the mire without mishap.\n\nBridle Trails is a great walk for those who know or want to get to know indigenous plants. Here you'll find several varieties of ferns, Oregon grape, huckleberry, salal, and many species of wild mushrooms, some edible and others poisonous.\n\nTo negotiate the miles of interweaving trails, study the trail map at the entrance and maybe stick to one of the marked trails such as the Trillium, Raven, or Coyote Trails. If you feel lost, just ask for directions. All the riders know their way around and are receptive to friendly hikers.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 5300 116th Avenue NE, Kirkland\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-405, take exit 17 (NE 70th Place). From northbound, turn right at the end of the ramp onto 116th Avenue NE, and go south about 1 mile to the park entrance on the left. Park at the northeast corner of the parking lot to access trails. From southbound, turn right at the end of the ramp onto NE 72nd Place, cross the freeway, then turn right again onto 116th Avenue NE and proceed as above. A Discover Pass is required for parking.\n\n**CONTACT:** Washington State Parks, (425) 649-4275, www.parks.wa.gov. To volunteer, contact Bridle Trails Park Foundation, (425) 307-3578, www.bridletrails.org.\n\n## **53 MARYMOOR PARK**\n\n**Redmond, 7.5 miles northeast of Bellevue**\n\n**_Bordered by the Sammamish River and Lake Sammamish, these 640 acres offer a bit of everything_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **5 miles total; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles, horses on equestrian trail only**  \n**DOGS** | **Off-leash area, otherwise on leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Sammamish River Trail (Walk #42), East Lake Sammamish Trail (via Marymoor Connector)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, bicycle velodrome, climbing rock, interpretive signs, model airplane field, museum, picnic shelters, playing fields, playgrounds, community garden, tennis courts**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved trails, restrooms, picnic areas**\n\nMarymoor's vast open spaces give this park a true year-round appeal. Walkers can choose to watch the bicyclists careen around the sloped velodrome, or gape at the nonacrophobic attacking tiny handholds on the climbing rock. An undulating whine and hum comes from the eastern edge of the park, where earthbound pilots put their model airplanes through their tricks.\n\nFor a more serene walk, take the nature trail south into the alder and oak forest. Interpretive signs guide you along a boardwalk over a peat bog, then out to the northern shore of Lake Sammamish. Completing the loop, the boardwalk leads back along the Sammamish River through a thicket of blackberries and salal and the gentle shade of alders. Here songbirds chatter and flit, and on the river you can see the iridescent flash of the mallard drakes or the elegant suits of the Canada geese.\n\nWhere the boardwalk ends, be prepared to greet dogs. Hundreds of them. Marymoor's off-leash area is a mecca for dogs, where they can romp and dig on the water's edge and in the fragrant fields adjoining.\n\nYear-round, keep the binoculars handy for a look at the red-tailed hawks circling overhead. On hot summer days, expect a sky alive with hot-air balloons as they glide to rest on Marymoor's fields. Bring a camera, and flex your muscles if you want to help deflate the billowing nylon.\n\nWhat is now the park was developed in the early 1900s as a family cattle farm. The original Willowmoor farmers used to boat across Lake Washington and then drive buckboards to the stately entrance of the farm. The old farmhouse remains, now a museum, as do the remnants of the drive and the bridge across the river. Inside, the museum takes you back to a time when the Eastside was a wild and rugged place.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 6046 West Lake Sammamish Parkway NE, Redmond\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-405, take exit 14 (WA 520\/Redmond) east. Continue east on WA 520 for 4.8 miles to the West Lake Sammamish Parkway exit (signposted for Marymoor Park). At the end of the ramp, go right on West Lake Sammamish Parkway, then immediately left at the next light into the park.\n\nFrom I-5, take exit 168B (WA 520\/Bellevue) across Lake Washington, continue east on WA 520, and proceed as above.\n\n**CONTACT:** King County Parks, (206) 296-4232, www.kingcounty.gov\/\u200brecreation\/\u200bparks. To volunteer, contact Friends of Marymoor Park: www.marymoor.org.\n\n## **54 ARDMORE PARK**\n\n**5.5 miles northeast of downtown Bellevue**\n\n**_A 30-acre forest nestled in suburbia hides a small stream and wetland_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1.5 miles total; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to moderate**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Playground, picnic tables**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **None**\n\nThis compact neighborhood park is a walker's dream, with wide wood-chip trails through a spacious forest of hemlock, cedar, and Douglas fir. Although it's nestled in the heart of suburbia, its sounds are sylvan, not motorized. In summer, robins hop along the trail, and chickadees and wrens call from the branches.\n\nThe trail, known to runners in the neighborhood as \"The Warm-Up Trail,\" meanders up and down gentle terrain and along the sides of a ravine cut by a tiny stream, where bare earth on its sides tells of winter flooding. So open is the forest floor, the path gives the impression of even greater length than its true 1.5 miles. The spacious forest and the silence are so compelling that you could wish the trail went on and on through these sword-fern valleys and hills.\n\nSummer visitors are rewarded with a feast of blackberries, red huckleberries, and thimbleberries. Traversing from south to north, you cross a bridge and angle up a short, steep hill some local walkers call \"Cardiac Hill.\" An untrustworthy-looking rope swing dangles above a ravine, and moss-covered steps are remnants of once-loved tree houses built long ago by neighborhood kids.\n\nThe trail leads to a marshy patch of skunk cabbage in a cedar glen, but a sturdy puncheon bridge keeps your feet dry in this dell of old tree stumps. Here signposts point to several different park exits, each only a tenth of a mile away.\n\nOn the northwest corner lies the tiny lawn, perfect for picnics either before or after this charming walk.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 16833 NE 30th Street, Bellevue\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From WA 520, take the 148th Avenue NE exit south. Go south on 148th Avenue NE, then left on NE 24th Street. Go east about 1.5 miles, and look on the left for the \"Nature Trail\" sign and entrance. Other entrances are located on suburban streets at NE 28th Street, NE 30th Street, and NE 28th Place. The picnic lawn lies along NE 30th Street. Parking is on-street and limited.\n\n**CONTACT:** Bellevue Parks and Community Services Department, (425) 452-6885, www.ci.bellevue.wa.us\/\u200bparks_intro.htm\n\n## **55 EVANS CREEK PRESERVE**\n\n**Sammamish and Redmond, 12 miles east of downtown Bellevue**\n\n**_Stroll or hike 2.6 miles of meadow, wetland, and forest trails that crisscross these 179 acres of Northwest nature at its best_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **2.6 miles; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Picnic tables, restrooms, viewing platforms, interpretive signs**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Lower parking, picnic areas**\n\nEnter a sylvan wonderland of moss-covered firs, graceful alders, and ancient time-softened stumps as you begin the descent into the Evans Creek watershed. Well-contoured trails switchback and traverse this classic Northwest forest, leading east and downward to more open woodland and bright meadows. Vistas of the Cascades appear, and beaver-gnawed trees line the creeks.\n\nWith both an upper and a lower parking lot, Evans Creek Preserve offers a choice of steep forest walking or gentle strolling in the meadows. In summer the forest trails remain cool under alder and Douglas fir, and the open meadows are bright with pathways leading to many picnic spots. In winter, the meadows may be white with frost, while the sculpted forest trails are frost protected by the dense forest canopy.\n\nWith several miles of trails to wander, it's comforting to have well sign-posted intersections showing the trail choices. An interpretive brochure, available for download from the City of Sammamish website, entices young hikers to discover some of the wonders of the forest and meadow habitat.\n\n**ADDRESS:** _Lower Parking Lot:_ 4001 224th Avenue NE, Redmond; _Upper Parking Lot:_ 3600 Sahalee Way NE, Sammamish\n\n**GETTING THERE:** _Lower Parking Lot:_ From Bellevue take WA 520 east and exit toward WA 202 E\/Redmond Way. Continue east on Redmond Way, which becomes Redmond\u2013Fall City Road, for about 3 miles. Turn right onto 224th Avenue NE to reach the lower parking lot within 0.5 miles.\n\n_Upper Parking Lot:_ As above, continue east on Redmond Way (Redmond\u2013Fall City Road) for about 1.6 miles, and turn right onto Sahalee Way NE. Look for the parking lot on the left in about 1.2 miles.\n\n**CONTACT:** Redmond Parks and Recreation Department, (425) 556-2300, www.ci.redmond.wa.us\/\u200bparksrecreation; Sammamish Parks and Recreation Department, (425) 295-0585, www.sammamish.us\/\u200bdepartments\/\u200bparksandrec\n\n## **56 BELLEVUE BOTANICAL GARDEN AND WILBURTON HILL PARK**\n\n**2.5 miles east of downtown Bellevue**\n\n**_Wander 158 acres of native forest, wetlands, meadows, and landscaping_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **3.5 miles; gravel, natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only in Bellevue Botanical Garden; bicycles in Wilburton Hill Park**  \n**DOGS** | **Not allowed in Bellevue Botanical Garden; leash and scoop in Wilburton Hill Park**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Kelsey Creek Park (Walk #57), via streets on Lake-to-Lake Trail**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, concerts, docent-led garden tours, gift shop, horticultural classes, picnic tables, playground, playing fields, tennis courts**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Tateuchi Loop Trail, restrooms**\n\nAlthough Bellevue Botanical Garden is technically within the borders of Wilburton Hill Park, the two are very different places. In Wilburton, beyond the playing fields, you walk through a forest green with salal and Douglas fir; in the garden, you are led along established paths showcasing native and hybrid plants and vibrant floral displays.\n\nCredit 42\n\nFor a good warm-up walk, head east from the Wilburton parking lot to the loop trail that borders the playing fields. As you enter the forest, it becomes a richly scented wood-chip trail zigzagging to the eastern boundary. Here, turn left along the quiet residential street for part of a block, then head back into the forest on a smaller, woodsy spur trail. Near the playing fields, you pass an innovative playground, where kids can scramble up and down the spiderweb and frolic in and out of the \"town hall.\"\n\nWhen you're ready for a quieter, slower stroll, step into the manicured year-round symphony of color in the botanical garden. The original owners, Cal and Harriet Shorts, toiled for many years to transform the heavy clay soil into the rich loam of the garden, and the work continues. Two years after the City of Bellevue received the land as a donation, the garden opened with 36 acres of woodlands, gardens, bogs, and meadows. Today it is a showplace for the Northwest Perennial Alliance, the Eastside Fuchsia Society, the King County Herb Society, and the North American Rock Garden Society.\n\nFollow the graveled Tateuchi Loop Trail into a glory of huge rhododendrons set in a forest of hemlock and fir. The Yao Garden is a contemporary garden that combines both Japanese and Northwest influences. Along the western slope of the garden, the Perennial Border, already world famous, is reminiscent of an abstract painting created with plants, each carefully chosen for the hue and shape of both flower and foliage. The new Lost Meadow Trail to the south meanders through woodlands, meadows, and wetlands.\n\n**ADDRESS:** _Bellevue Botanical Garden:_ 12001 Main Street, Bellevue; _Wilburton Hill Park:_ 100 124th Avenue NE\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-405, take exit 13B (NE 8th Street). From northbound, turn right onto NE 8th Street. From southbound, turn left onto NE 8th Street. Go about 0.6 miles. Turn right on 124th Avenue NE, and follow it until it ends at a sharp right onto Main Street. Wilburton Hill Park is straight ahead. Turn right onto Main Street and find the Bellevue Botanical Garden entrance on the left.\n\n**CONTACT:** Bellevue Botanical Garden Society, (425) 452-2750, www.bellevuebotanical.org\/\u200bsociety.html; Bellevue Parks and Community Services Department, (425) 452-6885, www.ci.bellevue.wa.us\/\u200bparks_intro.htm\n\n## **57 KELSEY CREEK PARK**\n\n**3 miles east of downtown Bellevue**\n\n**_Enjoy farm animals and search for forest wildlife in this 150-acre park_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **2.5 miles total; gravel, natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles on gravel; pedestrians only on forest trail; horses**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash; not allowed in barn area**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Bellevue Botanical Garden and Wilburton Hill Park (Walk #56), via streets on Lake-to-Lake Trail**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, playground, classes, farm animals, historic cabin, picnic tables**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Restrooms, farm**\n\nTucked neatly into a nook of suburban Bellevue, this well-loved park surprises newcomers with open meadows and fenced pastures, the baaing of sheep and the clucking of chickens. This early 1900s-style farm with its white fences, red barns, pens of pigs, and peacocks has long been a favorite with families wanting to show their children how farm animals were raised before the advent of chicken factories.\n\nFrom the parking lot, cross a tributary of Kelsey Creek south to lawns, picnic areas, and a small marsh with wild ducks. Then climb the hill east to the barnyard. A graveled loop road takes you past the ducks and ponies, then to the south by the old pioneer log cabin, moved here for renovation and preservation.\n\nMost visitors end their tour here, returning to picnic by the stream. But east of the barns and pony fields, another trail follows the pasture edge and then dives into the wooded hillside at the footbridge over Kelsey Creek. Here several adjoining loops take you up soft needle-padded paths and over footbridges above marshes. Wooden steps take you higher into the deciduous forest, where in fall the red and yellow leaves of the maples frame the farm buildings below, and in winter the vista opens to show a broad expanse of this farmland park. In spring look for the white hanging flowers, and in summer the red berries, of the Indian plum.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 13010 SE 4th Place, Bellevue\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-405, take exit 12 (SE 8th Street). Go east on SE 8th Street. Go under the railroad trestle to the light at Lake Hills Connector. Continue straight onto SE 7th Place. Go a few blocks, turn left on 130th Avenue SE, and then turn right onto SE 4th Place into the park.\n\n**CONTACT:** Bellevue Parks and Community Services Department, (425) 452-6885, www.ci.bellevue.wa.us\/\u200bparks_intro.htm\n\n**Where You Run Out of Breadcrumbs**\n\n**If a park isn't too big, you can explore it in the same way as a maze, by \"keeping one hand on the wall.\" If a trail map shows there are loops, you can continue taking right turns, thereby making your way back to where you started. In larger parks, such as Bridle Trails State Park, or on Cougar, Tiger, or Squak Mountains, it's best to develop a good sense of direction and walk with a friend, a cell phone, and a map. Look for map brochures at trailheads**.\n\n## **58 LAKE HILLS GREENBELT**\n\n**3.5 miles east of downtown Bellevue**\n\n**_Walk a 150-acre corridor through meadows and forest surrounding Larsen and Phantom Lakes_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **3 miles total; gravel, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Lake-to-Lake Trail, Phantom Lake Loop (both via streets)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, classes, display garden, free nature walks late spring through September, community garden, ranger station**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Some trail sections, restrooms, ranger station**\n\nIf you begin your walk at the Larsen Lake Blueberry Farm, you may see a single great blue heron standing motionless in a graceful posture among the lakeshore reeds, watching for fish, frogs, salamanders, and other aquatic prey. Ripples on the water tell of diving ducks, and between the water-lily pads, iridescent male mallards and their quacking brown mates glide. Both Larsen and Phantom Lakes, at the two ends of the Lake Hills Greenbelt, are important stopovers for waterfowl along the Pacific Flyway. As many as twenty-four species have been identified, including green-winged teals, northern shovelers, and ruddy ducks. In the twigs of the 40-year-old blueberry bushes, wrens and sparrows flit and twitter. In late summer look for flocks of cedar waxwings feeding on the berries.\n\nContinuing around Larsen Lake, the trail turns east then south along the reed-lined irrigation channel, crosses Lake Hills Boulevard (there's a crosswalk with a flashing light), and then enters an open meadow rimmed by conifers\u2014good hunting grounds for red-tailed, Cooper's, and sharp-shinned hawks. In the forest of Douglas fir and Sitka spruce, watch for signs of squirrels and the more secretive coyotes that travel the game trails through the undergrowth. River otters have been spotted in the lakes and the stream, as well as moles and muskrats along their banks.\n\nAt the corner of SE 16th Street and 156th Avenue SE, a small fruit stand operates through fall, selling fresh produce harvested from the rich peat-bog soils of the neighboring farms. If you turn west here, along SE 16th Street, you come immediately to the display garden, where you can pore over informative signs about a variety of herbs, flowers, and produce, and investigate a hands-on display of composting techniques. At the Lake Hills Greenbelt Ranger Station adjoining the garden, you'll find dioramas of the wildlife of the greenbelt and a three-dimensional display of the Larsen and Phantom Lakes drainage. Members of the Eastside chapter of the National Audubon Society often staff a booth to answer questions about the area's birds. Cross 156th Avenue SE diagonally to continue another quarter mile to the dock and boat launch on Phantom Lake.\n\n**ADDRESS:** _Larsen Lake Blueberry Farm:_ 14812 SE 8th Street, Bellevue; _Ranger Station:_ 15416 SE 16th Street, Bellevue\n\n**GETTING THERE:** _Larsen Lake:_ From I-405, take exit 13 (NE 8th Street) and go east on NE 8th Street. Turn right on 148th Avenue NE. At the light at SE 8th Street, make a U-turn and go north 1 block to the blueberry farm parking lot.\n\n_Ranger Station:_ From I-90, take exit 11B (148th Ave SE\/BCC) and go north to SE 16th Street. Turn right on SE 16th Street to the Community Farms parking lot.\n\n**CONTACT:** Lake Hills Greenbelt Ranger Station, (425) 452-7225, www.ci.bellevue.wa.us\/\u200bparks_intro.htm\n\n**But They're Such Fun to Feed!**\n\n**Most park authorities prohibit the feeding of waterfowl. Here's why: Human food is junk food to waterfowl, with none of the nutrients they need. Undernourished birds are more susceptible to disease. Feeding entices waterfowl to overwinter, which means more breeding pairs and an ever-increasing number of ducks and geese in our lakes. Waterfowl waste contains parasites that cause swimmer's itch, an allergic rash you wouldn't wish on anyone. Clean water means more swimming beaches. Waterfowl waste not only pollutes, it also fertilizes aquatic weeds that choke out other plants and animals. You can't swim or fish in a choked lake**.\n\n## **59 MERCER SLOUGH NATURE PARK**\n\n**2.5 miles south of downtown Bellevue**\n\n**_Boardwalks and interpretive trails wander through 320 acres of historic and environmentally important wetlands_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **6.5 miles; boardwalk, natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles on paved trails (discouraged on soft-surface trails)**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Lake-to-Lake Trail (via streets), Mountains-to-Sound Greenway**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, classes, Environmental Education Center, interpretive trail, museum**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved trail along Bellevue Way, I-90, and 118th Avenue SE; restrooms**\n\nJust minutes from downtown Bellevue, you can stroll miles of secluded trails that surround the Mercer Slough and wetlands, a paradise for birds and bird-watchers alike. Here, in fall and spring, thousands of migrating waterfowl on the Pacific Flyway en route to and from the Arctic find vital haven. Many stay over for the winter, making their nests in the cattails and reeds along the edges of the slough. Not only a haven for waterfowl, the surrounding iris and cattail marsh, blackberry thickets, and cottonwood trees provide habitat for more than a hundred other species of birds, including eagles, pheasant, owls, swifts, thrushes, and more.\n\nLong ago the Mercer Slough area was part of the vast marshlands that surrounded Lake Washington. Native peoples lived here, hunting muskrat and small mammals, fishing for salmon, and gathering edible roots and berries. In 1916, when the ship canal project lowered Lake Washington by 9 feet, the area could no longer support people whose livelihood depended on the bounty of the marshlands.\n\nToday, 6.5 miles of trails, both paved (including some sidewalk) and wood chipped, twist through and around these preserved 320 acres. Overlake Blueberry Farm (open when berries are in season) and the historic Winters House add variety to a walk along Mercer Slough. From May to September you can rent a canoe and see the wetlands from the water trail through the park.\n\n**ADDRESS:** _Winter's House:_ 2102 Bellevue Way SE, Bellevue; _Environmental Education Center:_ 1625 118th Avenue SE, Bellevue\n\n**GETTING THERE:** _Overlake Blueberry Farm or Winters House:_ From I-90, take exit 9 (Bellevue Way SE). Go about 0.25 miles north on Bellevue Way SE. The park is on your right.\n\n_Environmental Education Center:_ From I-90, take exit 10A or 10 (I-405\/Bellevue) and go north. From I-405 take exit 12 (SE 8th Street\/116th Avenue SE). Turn left onto SE 8th Street and then immediately turn left onto 118th Avenue SE. The Environmental Education Center will be on your left.\n\n**CONTACT:** Bellevue Parks and Community Services Department, (425) 452-6885, www.ci.bellevue.wa.us\/\u200bparks_intro.htm; Mercer Slough Environmental Education Center, (425) 452-2565\n\n## **60 ROBINSWOOD PARK**\n\n**4 miles southeast of downtown Bellevue**\n\n**_Bird-watch in an open forest, and stroll past lawns, a pond, and an off-leash area in this 60-acre park_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1 mile; gravel, natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles on paved trails**  \n**DOGS** | **Off-leash area, otherwise on leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Lake-to-Lake Trail (via streets)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, hospitality\/retreat center, picnic shelter, playground, tennis center**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Restrooms, buildings, picnic areas, playground**\n\nAs though they know the park is named for them, the red-breasted robins whinny and call _tut tut tut_ as they hop slowly from the needle-lined path to the salal bushes. This rectangle of green neighborhood park so close to I-90 provides lawns for lazing on, a pond to explore, and a mile of trails through open forest.\n\nIf you sometimes feel closed in by the dense Northwest forest, this is a good park to explore, with its more open glades. Begin near Robinswood House on 148th Avenue SE, and if there are no wedding guests milling about, explore the secluded garden behind the house. Then head into the forest of Douglas fir and madrona.\n\nThe trail makes weblike loops, leading finally to steps and the paved Lake to Lake Trail along the southern boundary. Turn east toward 153rd Avenue SE and reenter the forest heading north, where it seems light, even on overcast days. As is characteristic of young Douglas firs, the lower branches have fallen off as the upper ones seek light. The result: a forest of poles under an umbrella of green. The undergrowth of salal and Oregon grape is clearly visible, as are the robins and wrens that perch in the low shrubs. On this gently padded natural trail, your feet make no sound, so the birds are less quick to take flight.\n\nSoon you emerge at a green manicured lawn, where a small pond attracts kids with model boats and ducks seeking food. In spring you'll likely see a female mallard with her brood of peeping ducklings. To the east are the tennis center and off-leash area, but heading north returns you to forest and more quiet walking before you emerge at the playing fields.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 2430 148th Avenue SE, Bellevue\n\n**GETTING THERE:** _West Entrance:_ From I-90 eastbound, take exit 11B (148th Avenue SE) and head north. The park is on the right just after SE 28th Street. From I-90 westbound, take exit 11 (161st Avenue SE, 156th Avenue SE, 150th Avenue SE). Turn right on 161st Avenue SE, left on Eastgate Way, right onto 148th Avenue SE, and proceed as above.\n\n_North and east entrances:_ They are off SE 22nd Street and 151st Place SE, respectively.\n\n**CONTACT:** Bellevue Parks and Community Services Department, (425) 452-6885, www.ci.bellevue.wa.us\/\u200bparks_intro.htm\n\n**Be a VIP**\n\n**Many city and county parks departments have opportunities for volunteers. In King County, for example, they need people to help with administrative work, data entry, docent programs, fundraisers, trail restoration, and more. Call your local park authority, and ask if they have a VIP (Volunteers-in-Parks) program. Then get out and help the parks you love**.\n\n## **61 WEOWNA PARK**\n\n**Bellevue, 6 miles east of downtown Bellevue**\n\n**_This 80-acre swath of old forest is vibrantly alive with birdsong and big trees that line deep ravines sloping down to Lake Sammamish_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **2.5 miles; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Lake-to-Lake Trail**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Interpretive signs, picnic tables, viewing platforms**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **None**\n\nStep from the manicured neighborhoods of Bellevue's suburbs into a forest left wild and free for many decades. Here, in this north-south greenbelt above Lake Sammamish, century-old Douglas firs rise above fern-bedecked ravines, and the beautifully maintained trails lead you on a walk in one of the city's finest forests. Huge stumps, softened by years of moss and rain, stand as reminders of the past. Rectangular holes in the tall snags tell of the pileated woodpeckers that call this forest their home. Under the canopy of western red cedar and big-leaf maples, an understory of sword fern, young alders, mahonia, and stinging nettle flourish. Even at the height of summer, the undergrowth is low enough to allow peekaboo views of the glistening waters of Lake Sammamish far below to the east.\n\nWeowna Park has long been on the map as a stretch of green between Lake Sammamish and the homes on the plateau above, but not until a few years ago were the random footpaths mapped, signposted, and transformed into graceful wood-chip trails. Long ago, Phantom Creek, which originally ran north from Phantom Lake, was reengineered by an innovative pioneer, who dug a ditch to allow the creek to drain to the east, into Lake Sammamish. Over the years, the creek wore away at the easily eroded glacial till, and the result today is a deep ravine marked by small waterfalls and pools during the wet months of the year. In summer, all that remains of this creek is a trickle of waterfall visible from a wooden viewing platform about 50 feet above the creek bed. The steep contours of this park offer double bounty: a good workout for those seeking it, and sumptuous views of fern-filled dales studded with the hefty trunks of fir and cedar.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 1420 168th Avenue SE, Bellevue; also, 2010 and 335 West Lake Sammamish Parkway SE, Bellevue, with limited parking.\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-90, eastbound, take exit 11B (148th Avenue SE). Take a slight right onto 148th Avenue SE. Go 0.8 miles and turn right onto SE 16th Street. Take a slight left onto SE Phantom Way. SE Phantom Way becomes SE 14th Street. Stay on SE 14th Street as it curves south to become 168th Avenue SE. Go 5 blocks to the trailhead on the left. Street parking only. Alternatively, park at Lake Hills Park, 1200 164th Avenue SE.\n\n**CONTACT:** Bellevue Parks and Community Services Department, (425) 452-6885, www.ci.bellevue.wa.us\/\u200bparks_intro.htm\n\n## **62 SOARING EAGLE REGIONAL PARK**\n\n**Sammamish, 12 miles east of Bellevue**\n\n**_This 600-acre forest is home to a variety of mammals, including bear and cougar, and more than forty bird species_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **13 miles; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to moderate**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles, horses**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Connector trail to Beaver Lake Preserve (Walk #64)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, maps, trail junction markers**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **None**\n\nIn this airy, open forest, ferns bob and nod in the breeze and wren and robin calls surround you. Soft, narrow trails lead you from the main Pipeline Trail into older forest where moss-covered logs play nursery to young ferns and elderberry bushes. Other trails wind and twist through the green understory to a pond and wetlands. Although you are never more than half a mile from development, little to no traffic noise penetrates the woods here, high on the Sammamish Plateau. This is a wild park with relatively young trees. Along the Pipeline Trail, maples and alders dominate, while deeper to the north and south, where the land has not been so recently disturbed, hemlocks, western red cedar, and young Douglas firs are coming to dominate. The forest provides habitat for more than forty bird species, and black bears and cougars have been sighted.\n\nOnce a mountain biker's paradise (the trails were created and named by bikers), Soaring Eagle Regional Park has been somewhat gentrified now, and the well-signposted trails are shared equally by equestrians, bike riders, and walkers. In summer the salmonberries and thimbleberries grow lush and wild by the trail, and in winter, if the muddy trails don't deter you, there are peekaboo views of the Cascade foothills to the east. The best time to enjoy Soaring Eagle Regional Park is in the summer and early fall before the rains. Although the main Pipeline Trail has no intersection maps, all the smaller trail junctions have numbered posts with maps, so you always know where you are. Pipeline Trail is wide and level enough for strollers.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 26015 East Main Drive, Sammamish\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-405, take exit 14 (WA 520 Redmond\/Seattle) and head east toward Redmond. Take the WA 202 exit and turn right onto WA 202\/Redmond Way. Go 2.4 miles and turn right at Sahalee Way NE. This becomes 228th Avenue NE. Go 2.2 miles and turn left at SE 8th Street. Follow this street as it turns north and becomes 244th Avenue SE. Turn right on E Main Drive. Go 1.1 miles to the parking lot at the end.\n\n**CONTACT:** King County Parks, (206) 477-4527, www.kingcounty.gov\/\u200brecreation\/parks\n\n## **63 HAZEL WOLF WETLANDS PRESERVE**\n\n**Sammamish, 12 miles east of Bellevue**\n\n**_More than 100 acres of untouched forest and wetlands provide habitat for native plants and animals_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1.5 miles total; boardwalk, natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only; horses on western perimeter trail**  \n**DOGS** | **Not allowed**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Beaver Lake Preserve (Walk #64)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Interpretive signs, maps, viewpoint over wetlands**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **None**\n\nWalk quietly through one of King County's most diverse and pristine wetland habitats, where osprey and bald eagles rest from a day of fishing on nearby Beaver Lake. In summer, salal plants are bedecked with white bellflowers, and yellow, orange, and red salmonberries glisten from their bushes. Slender blue dragonflies with alternating navy- and light-blue stripes alight on shrubs by the trail, and Douglas squirrels chatter on the trunks of the moss-covered western red cedars. In winter look for wood ducks and hooded mergansers on the pond.\n\nThe 116-acre wetlands preserve was named for one of Seattle's most active environmentalists, the late Hazel Wolf, on her one hundredth birthday. Access to the preserve passes behind a new housing development, but within a quarter mile you have descended into a forest of big-leaf maples and sword ferns, where the heavy scent of wet earth and greenery surrounds you. Boardwalks and bridges lead over wetlands water so clear that it is surprising to hear it in motion. Look for footprints in the mud to see who has been feeding nearby\u2014a muskrat, perhaps, or a family of beaver.\n\nA loop trail leads to the viewing platform and interpretive signs over the marshes. Look for coots dabbling in the water, and listen for the deep _thrump_ of bullfrogs and the call of red-winged blackbirds. By early summer the native water lilies should be in full bloom, with red-rimmed yellow flowers above heart-shaped leaves. In the rainy season the loop trail may not be passable due to high water. If so, you can still enjoy the edge of the wetlands by walking out and back on the one-way trails.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 24735 248th Avenue SE, Sammamish (approximate)\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-405, take exit 14 (WA 520 Redmond\/Seattle). Go east (toward Redmond). Go about 5.5 miles and take the WA 202 E exit. Turn right at WA 202\/Redmond Way. Go 4.4 miles and turn right at 244th Avenue NE. At the traffic circle continue south on 244th Avenue SE. Turn left onto SE Windsor Boulevard and continue onto 248th Avenue SE to the small parking lot under the power lines, on your left.\n\n**CONTACT:** Sammamish Parks and Recreation Department, (425) 295-0585, www.sammamish.us\/\u200bdepartments\/\u200bparksandrec. For information on volunteering, visit www.forterra.org.\n\n## **64 BEAVER LAKE PRESERVE**\n\n**Sammamish, 12 miles east of Bellevue**\n\n**_This mature 57-acre forest, with trees approaching old-growth status, is home to several endangered bird and amphibian species_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1.2 miles total; gravel, natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles and horses on connector trail to Soaring Eagle Regional Park only**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash; dogs prohibited in adjoining Hazel Wolf Wetlands Preserve**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Hazel Wolf Wetlands Preserve (Walk #63) and Soaring Eagle Regional Park (Walk #62)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, interpretive signs, map, picnic area, viewing platforms**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Graveled trail, restrooms, parking lot**\n\nWalk a protected forest with sword ferns the height of an adult, and towering Douglas firs and western red cedar more than 200 years old. Imagine these trails before the pioneers arrived, when people of the Sammamish tribe would traverse the forest paths en route to the shores of today's Beaver Lake or stalk black-tailed deer through the understory. This forest and the adjoining Hazel Wolf Wetlands Preserve (Walk #63) are some of the least touched wild land in the Puget Sound region.\n\nTrails loop to the north and south of the parking area (crossing West Beaver Lake Drive, so be wary of traffic). An interpretive trail with nature quiz questions provides entertainment and learning on the northern loop. Bridges cross Laughing Jacobs Creek and other sensitive wetlands. Spur trails on the south side of Beaver Lake Drive lead to a meadow and a shady stand of western red cedars. The city plans to extend the trails all the way to the edge of Beaver Lake, where you may see osprey or bald eagles perched above the water, or flocks of colorful wood ducks or white-headed buffleheads.\n\nCredit 48\n\nIf bringing a dog, be vigilant for the boundary signs demarcating Hazel Wolf Wetlands on the northwestern side of the preserve. Dogs are not allowed on the wetland trails, but luckily there are plenty of sights and smells to entertain a canine friend on the Beaver Lake Preserve trails.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 1400 W Beaver Lake Drive SE, Sammamish\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-405, take exit 14 (WA 520 Redmond\/Seattle) and head east toward Redmond. Take the WA 202\/Redmond Way exit and go east on WA 202. Go 2.4 miles and turn right at Sahalee Way NE. This becomes 228th Avenue NE. Go 5.4 miles and turn left at SE 24th Street. Go 1.3 miles and turn right to stay on SE 24th Street. Just after the Lodge at Beaver Lake, the road curves left to become W Beaver Lake Drive SE. Go about 0.9 miles and look for the parking area on the left.\n\n**CONTACT:** Sammamish Parks and Recreation Department, (425) 295-0585, www.sammamish.us\/\u200bdepartments\/\u200bparksandrec\n\n## **65 BEAVER LAKE PARK**\n\n**Sammamish Plateau, 15 miles southeast of Bellevue**\n\n**_Lakeshore totem poles lead to 82 acres of forest and meadow trails near Laughing Jacobs Creek_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **2 miles; natural surface and paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **Off-leash areas, otherwise on leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, conference lodge, fishing area, picnic shelter, playground, playing fields**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Restrooms, lodge, picnic shelter, paved trails**\n\nIn this sanctuary from suburbia on the Sammamish Plateau, silence is broken only by the call of birds and the trickle of Laughing Jacobs Creek. Beaver Lake Park is an interesting 400-acre mix of amenities, art, and nature. Two totem poles, carved by David Boxley under the King County 1 Percent for Art Program, illustrate salmon and beaver legends of the British Columbian Tsimshian people.\n\nIn recent years, toads have been the memorable wildlife attraction of the park, during a few weeks twice a year. Each spring, in April or May, hundreds of adult western toads migrate en masse back to their breeding grounds at Beaver Lake. By midsummer, the metamorphosed young toadlets journey through the park and across the road to drier forest, where they mature.\n\nFrom the main parking area near the lake, the 1.5-mile loop trail begins south of the picnic shelter, in which are displayed three Native American house posts from Upper Skagit tribes carved by David Horsley\u2014again, with King County arts funds. Pass the beaver pole and enter the forest. The trail loosely follows the lake edge south and then turns west to cross the creek. Huge snags tell of giant trees felled by wind or fire.\n\nCredit 49\n\nThe west end of the park is where the action is: ball fields ringing with shouts and calls of children, and two off-leash areas for large and small dogs. Off-leash trails lead into the forest, so there is shade for the dogs and dog owners alike. Newly improved paved trails at the west end allow strollers and wheelchairs more access than in previous years. Several loop trails offer almost 2 miles of meandering walks.\n\n**ADDRESS:** _North parking lot and lodge:_ 25201 SE 24th Street; _West end and dog park:_ 2526 244th Avenue SE, Sammamish\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-405, take exit 14 (WA 520\/Redmond) east to Redmond. Turn right onto WA 202 (Redmond\u2013Fall City Road). Go 2.5 miles and turn right on Sahalee Way NE, which becomes 228th Avenue SE. Go 5.4 miles and turn left on SE 24th Street. Continue 1.5 miles to the park, which is on the right.\n\nFrom I-90, take exit 17 (Front Street\/E Lake Sammamish Parkway). Turn north on Front Street N\/E Lake Sammamish Parkway. Go 2 miles and turn right on SE 43rd Way, which becomes 228th Avenue SE. Go 2.5 miles north and turn right on SE 24th Street. The park is on the right in 1.5 miles.\n\n**CONTACT:** Sammamish Parks and Recreation Department, (425) 295-0585, www.sammamish.us\/\u200bdepartments\/\u200bparksandrec\n\n**Wetland Inhabitants**\n\n**Amphibians like the Pacific tree frog and the long-toed salamander inhabit the wetlands around Puget Sound. You may see the salamander tadpoles in the water or hear the song of the tree frogs. Blackbirds and marsh wrens nest in the cattails and reeds. The presence of these creatures indicates the health of the wetland ecosystem. Be sure to stay on boardwalks, and never allow pollutants to reach streams or ponds**.\n\n## **66 COAL CREEK NATURAL AREA**\n\n**5.5 miles south of downtown Bellevue**\n\n**_Sylvan wilderness offers creekside forest wandering, old mines, and a waterfall in this 450-acre natural area_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **6 miles round-trip; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to moderate**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Cougar Mountain Regional Wildland Park (Walk #69)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Interpretive signs**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **None**\n\nLike a green finger beckoning from the summit of Cougar Mountain toward Lake Washington, Coal Creek Natural Area entices those looking for a low-elevation wildlands walk. Leave your car and let the forest surround you with tangled masses of ferns, blackberries, maples, and cedars. From the western (lower) end, the trail closely parallels Coal Creek. Old fallen trees lie across the natural surface trail, their mossy coats worn away by countless feet passing over them. In some, notches scar the trunks where volunteers have cut steps for fellow hikers.\n\nFrom the Coal Creek Parkway parking lot, the trail climbs steadily for 3 miles to the Red Town trailhead of Cougar Mountain Regional Wildland Park (Walk #69). Although there are a few tangent trails leading up to housing developments on the ridge or to streamside viewpoints, the main trail is well maintained with numerous new bridges.\n\nCarved wooden signposts give directions and trail mileages. To make a loop of the walk, after crossing the creek on a footbridge, follow the Primrose Trail off to the left, which passes Sandstone Falls 1.4 miles from the trailhead. Farther along, you pass a side trail to Shazo Mine. This, like other abandoned mines, must be viewed from afar; signs at the Cougar Mountain trailhead just above here warn of odorless, colorless gases that may be present in any mine shaft. The Primrose Trail continues up a steep hillside, then joins the larger, better-maintained Coal Creek Trail. Turn right to complete the loop or left to meet up with other Cougar Mountain trails at the Red Town Trailhead (Walk #69).\n\nIn the past few years, many volunteers and Bellevue parks people worked to improve the trail and build footbridges, which have made this trail more family friendly, although it can still be a challenge with its 550-foot elevation gain. If you're equal to it, all of this adds up to the pleasure of a few hours spent in sylvan wilderness.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 5600 Coal Creek Parkway SE, Bellevue\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-405, take exit 10 (Coal Creek Parkway\/Factoria). Turn east onto Coal Creek Parkway SE. Go about 1.25 miles (past the light at Forest Drive SE), and look on the left for a gravel parking lot before crossing the creek. Small trailheads lead from neighborhoods nearby.\n\n**CONTACT:** Bellevue Parks and Community Services Department, (425) 452-6885, www.bellevuewa.gov\/\u200bparks-community-services.htm\n\n**Natural or Man-Made?**\n\n**When you see small logs and branches blocking a fork in the trail, they may have been put there on purpose. Trail maintenance crews often close off old trails that are washed out, dangerous, or being replanted or moved. Steep, eroded trails may just be \"social trails\" that are not part of the trails system plan. Stay off anything that looks as if it would be a waterfall in the rainy season, and you'll do your part to help prevent erosion**.\n\n## **67 LEWIS CREEK PARK**\n\n**Bellevue, 9 miles southeast of downtown**\n\n**_This 55-acre park combines the best of a suburban activities park with natural areas, including trails through forest, creek, wetlands, and meadow_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **3 miles total; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to moderate**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Lakemont Park Trails to Lakemont Community Park (Walk #68)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Interpretive center, restrooms, playground, sports fields, picnic area**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Interpretive center, restrooms, wetlands trail**\n\nA gentle path, alternating between paved, gravel, and boardwalk, encircles lush wetlands where red-winged blackbirds grace the cattails and secretive Virginia rails call out with their repetitive high chirping. If you're lucky, you may see one scurrying to shelter as you approach its hiding place under the boardwalk. Several sturdy plank bridges cross the sensitive wetlands, which act as sponges to absorb and filter pollution, thereby protecting the water quality of Lewis Creek.\n\nBeyond the sports fields, playground, and wetlands you can enter the quiet alder forest, where the only sounds are the shooshing of the water over rocks and logs in Evans Creek. This forest, in the fast-encroaching suburbs, has the important role of decreasing erosion and runoff. For walkers, it allows a respite from urban life and time for quiet contemplation. Common birds in the park include crows, northern flickers, woodpeckers, robins, and wrens. Since the park is close to Cougar Mountain, larger mammals such as coyotes and even bobcats have been spotted.\n\nNamed after Phillip Lewis, who surveyed this area in the 1860s, the land was logged for its fir and hemlock, then purchased by the Peltola family for farming in 1921. Today, park rangers lead guided nature walks, and birding books and binoculars are available for checkout in the interpretive center, which is open daily from 10:00 a.m. to 4:00 p.m. except Mondays, Tuesdays, and holidays.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 5808 Lakemont Boulevard SE, Bellevue\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-90, take exit 13 (SE Newport Way\/Lakemont Boulevard SE). Turn right and merge onto Lakemont Boulevard SE. Continue 2 miles and turn left onto SE 58th Street to enter the park.\n\n**CONTACT:** Bellevue Parks and Community Services Department, (425) 452-4195, www.bellevuewa.gov\/\u200bparks-community-services.htm\n\n## **68 LAKEMONT COMMUNITY PARK**\n\n**Bellevue, 8 miles southeast of downtown Bellevue**\n\n**_Get the heart rate up as you descend and ascend the forested Lewis Creek ravine in 124 acres of forest where the only sounds are rushing water and birdsong_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **3 miles; natural surface and stairs**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Moderate to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Lakemont Park Trails to Lewis Creek Park (Walk #67)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, interpretive signs, playground, picnic area, playing fields, skate park, tennis courts**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Restrooms, paved walkway only**\n\nAlthough Lakemont Community Park first appears as a rather strange city park (there's a large fenced sinkhole just beyond the restrooms and a fenced filtration pond, providing storm-water treatment), its true beauty reveals itself for those walking past the ball field. Here, the trail drops in a series of switchbacks through towering second-growth forest. Nurse logs lie tumbled across the creek, and maidenhair ferns grace the trunks of moss-covered trees. In the wet season, Lewis Creek bubbles and rushes far below, and the sounds of the city are drowned by water and birdsong.\n\nBy preserving vast stretches of green between Lake Sammamish and Cougar Mountain, the City of Bellevue has maintained a natural corridor for wildlife deep in the heart of suburbia. Deer are often spotted in this second-growth forest, and both black bears and cougars have also been seen. For the safety of all, please keep your dogs on leash.\n\nThis well-maintained forest trail drops 270 feet in a series of switchbacks and trestled staircases before crossing the creek. From here, you can climb up and wind through the neighborhoods a bit to find a kiosk leading back to the parking lot, or continue several more miles to Evans Creek Park. There is no easy in and out. Gauge your abilities (and those of your children) before descending too far down this path shaded by big-leaf maple and Douglas fir.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 5170 Village Park Drive SE, Bellevue\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-90, take exit 13 (SE Newport Way\/Lakemont Boulevard SE). Turn right and merge onto Lakemont Boulevard SE. Continue 1.3 miles and turn left onto Village Park Drive SE. Go 0.2 miles to the park, on your left.\n\n**CONTACT:** Bellevue Parks and Community Services Department, (425) 452-6885, www.bellevuewa.gov\/\u200bparks-community-services.htm\n\n## **69 COUGAR MOUNTAIN REGIONAL WILDLAND PARK**\n\n**Bellevue, 8.5 miles southeast of downtown**\n\n**_Groomed trails in more than 3,000 acres of untamed forest encourage exploration along streams and old mining areas_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **From 1 mile to 50 miles; gravel, natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Horses on some trails; no bicycles allowed**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Coal Creek Natural Area (Walk #66), Squak Mountain State Park (Walk #70)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, guided walks in summer, maps, historical sites**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **None**\n\nCougar Mountain Regional Wildland Park may be partially groomed, but it is not tamed. In its forest you'll find wildlife, streams, cliffs, ravines, and history. Deer, bobcats, porcupines, and black bears roam the 3,000-plus acres, and many species of forest-dwelling songbirds live in the canopy or in the lush undergrowth. Here, too, you'll see evidence of long-ago logging and mining.\n\nTo understand, and come to love, Cougar Mountain, with its almost 50 miles of trails, you need to start one step at a time. You may have read about its labyrinth of trails, which could foil a maze-trained laboratory rat and cause it to give up in despair. Thanks to massive efforts by King County Parks and the Issaquah Alps Trails Club (all volunteers), Cougar Mountain is becoming a walker-friendly place. And the Red Town Trailhead may be the best place from which to take an introductory walk.\n\nAt the parking lot, take a map from the information board; notice that south is at the map's top. Many loop walks are possible, ranging in length from 0.5 miles to many miles. Start small and increase your distances as you become familiar with the trail markings and the map.\n\nFor a good introduction, try W1, the Wildside Trail. Angling due south from the parking lot, it passes a sign warning of danger from gases (mainly carbon dioxide) in mines. Believe it and heed it, but don't panic. You will be on well-traveled, open-air trails, not crawling through mine shafts. Wildside is a natural trail that crosses bridges over Coal Creek and threads through a vegetation-restoration project, an example of the dedicated care of the Trails Club volunteers. Make a loop back onto W2, Red Town Trail, for a sampler. On your next visit, branch out. Have fun.\n\nCredit 51\n\n**ADDRESS:** _Red Town Trailhead:_ 7549 SE Newcastle\u2014Coal Creek Road, Bellevue\n\n**GETTING THERE:** _Red Town Trailhead:_ From I-90, take exit 13 (SE Newport Way\/Lakemont Boulevard SE). Merge onto Lakemont Boulevard SE. Continue south about 2.9 miles to the trailhead on the left at Coal Creek\u2013Newcastle Road.\n\n**CONTACT:** King County Parks, (206) 296-4232, www.kingcounty.gov\/\u200brecreation\/\u200bparks. For information on volunteering and year-round guided hikes and events, visit www.issaquahalps.org\/\u200bhome.\n\n**How Long Will It Take?**\n\n**The average adult walks at about 2 to 3 miles per hour; children under age seven, about half that speed; bird-watchers\u2014well, that depends. Variables include age and energy level, activities along the way, and trail conditions. Once you know your own pace and that of your friends or family, you'll know how long to allow for a 2-mile walk on level or hilly terrain**.\n\n## **70 SQUAK MOUNTAIN STATE PARK**\n\n**Issaquah, 11 miles southeast of Bellevue**\n\n**_Stroll a storybook interpretive trail, or walk high into more than 1,500 acres of forested Issaquah Alps_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **About 13 miles total (including the 2-mile Equestrian Loop Trail and the 0.5-mile Pretzel Tree Trail); gravel, natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle (Pretzel Tree Trail) to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Horses in southern part of park**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Cougar Mountain Regional Wildland Park (Walk #69)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, interpretive trail, picnic area**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Restrooms**\n\nPreserved as a handful of second-growth forest amid the sprawl of suburbia, Squak Mountain State Park provides needed wildlife habitat and miles of walking trails. Like its neighboring Issaquah Alps parks\u2014the Cougar and Tiger Mountain areas\u2014Squak was pulled from the brink of random off-road destruction, and consequently hosts a spiderweb of paths. To ensure you don't get lost, stick to the signposted, well-maintained trails.\n\nOnly one official parking area serves the state park, on the southern boundary, off SE May Valley Road. From there, you can access a 0.5-mile interpretive trail named Pretzel Tree Trail. This level and easy walk caters to the young hiker, with many color-illustrated signs telling the story of the fictitious Mr. Mouse and his journey into the forest. Along the way he (and the young hikers) learn about the plants and animals and are encouraged to find the \"pretzel tree\" (not a species, but a tree twisted like a pretzel).\n\nClimbing the gravel access road (used only by park vehicles) about 0.4 miles leads you to the cutoff for the Equestrian Loop Trail (S4). Step from the gravel to the quiet, soft duff under large Douglas firs and big-leaf maples. This narrow, well-worn path twists its way around old snags that stand like apartment buildings for bugs and birds alike. Sword ferns grace the slopes of the ravines above Phil's Creek, and the light plays on the leaves of the elderberry and salal.\n\nForks in the path are clearly marked with directions and distances, so you can choose to extend your walk, take a more strenuous cutoff, or, later, head up Phil's Creek Trail (S3) to the Central Peak. On this densely forested mountain, views are limited to the immediately surrounding hillsides, and even at the highest point the trees prohibit distance viewing. But the forest itself delights with its fragrance and terrain\u2014and the chance of seeing the spoor of raccoons, mountain beavers, or even cougars or bears.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 21430 SE May Valley Road, Issaquah\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-90, take exit 15 (WA 900\/Renton). Go south on WA 900 (Renton-Issaquah Road SE) through the stoplight on SE Newport Way. Drive south 3.5 miles to SE May Valley Road and turn left. Go 4.75 miles on SE May Valley Road, to the parking lot on your left. A Discover Pass is required for parking.\n\n**CONTACT:** Washington State Parks, (425) 455-7010, www.parks.wa.gov\n\n## **71 LAKE SAMMAMISH STATE PARK**\n\n**Issaquah, 8 miles southeast of Bellevue**\n\n**_512 acres of meadows and wetlands provide bird-watching and other lakeside pursuits_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **5.2 miles; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **East Lake Sammamish Trail**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, freshwater beach, playground, interpretive trail, picnic shelters, playfields**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved trails, restrooms, picnic areas**\n\nAn immense 512-acre lakeside park, Lake Sammamish State Park attracts hordes of beachgoers, sunbathers, and picnickers enjoying the mile of lakefront in the warm summer months. But beyond the crowds of summer, or on most days the rest of the year, you'll have miles of walking in relative solitude. On a wet day, power walkers can try the paved trails around the parking areas that lead through lawns and fields, past picnic shelters and restrooms.\n\nCredit 53\n\nThe best walking, though, lies farther north at the end of the parking area. Here a small footbridge spans quiet Issaquah Creek, and interpretive signs tell about the watershed. Once across the creek, follow the wood-chip trail left under the shade of cottonwoods and firs to a point of land by the mouth of the creek. In summer this is a favorite spot for more remote picnics, sunbathing, and swimming.\n\nIf you want summer solitude, once you cross the creek turn right and follow hedgerows of blackberry brambles, which have fragrant blooms in July and succulent fruit in late summer. This natural trail winds its way along the creek and north through meadows (great for bird-watching) and scrub forest to the boat-launch parking area accessible off E Lake Sammamish Parkway.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 2000 NW Sammamish Road, Issaquah\n\n**GETTING THERE:** _Southern entrance:_ From I-90 eastbound, take exit 15 (Renton\/WA 900\/Lake Sammamish State Park) and turn left on 17th Avenue NW, crossing over the freeway. At the T-junction, turn left onto NW Sammamish Road, and in 0.4 miles turn right into the park. Brown state park signs help guide you from the freeway.\n\n_Eastern entrance:_ From the T-junction at NW Sammamish Road, turn right (east) and then left onto E Lake Sammamish Parkway; the boat launch and trailhead are across from 4460 E Lake Sammamish Parkway. A Discover Pass is required for parking.\n\n**CONTACT:** Washington State Parks, (425) 455-7010, www.parks.wa.gov\n\n**Art along the Trails**\n\n**Public artworks along these trails range in sophistication and variety from Native American carvings to children's mosaics, from the towering** **_A Sound Garden_** **to wrought-iron bench backs. These projects add variety and interest to the walks. Have you found the park with totem poles? Cast figures? An eagle? A sound garden? How about an earth sculpture?**\n\n## **72 TIGER MOUNTAIN**\n\n**Issaquah, 14 miles southeast of Bellevue**\n\n**_Explore Tradition Lake and its wetlands, then branch out into more than 4,400 acres for more adventure_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **20 miles; gravel, natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Horses, bicycles on designated trails**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Many Tiger Mountain trails**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic shelters, interpretive trail**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Sections of Around the Lake Trail, restrooms**\n\nTo have to choose one walk on Tiger Mountain is like being led to a smorgasbord and then being told to taste only one dish. Tiger Mountain, like its neighbor Cougar Mountain, must be sampled on many repeat trips. Both areas, because they are wildlands, challenge the timid walker with their numerous side trails and their sometimes-unmarked intersections. Start with one well-trodden, well-signposted trail. Learn the trailhead area, become familiar with the names of other trails, and then add them, one by one, to your hiking menu.\n\nTradition Lake Plateau is only a few minutes from downtown Issaquah and has thirteen trails to choose from. Many are level or nearly level. Most are signed. From the parking area, pass through the gate and follow the road as it gradually climbs to the power lines. Turn left to find the restrooms, interpretive signs, and map. If you don't have a map in hand (available at the Chamber of Commerce in Issaquah for $2.50), choose either the Around the Lake Trail or the Bus Road Trail for starters; both are clearly signed.\n\nThe Around the Lake Trail is graded for wheelchair accessibility. Follow its level wanderings on a hillside in lush forest. In spring, wildflowers such as western trillium and vanilla leaf brighten the shadows under the Douglas fir and western red cedar. Pale-green new growth on the lady ferns uncurls like sleeping caterpillars. Down to your right, you'll see glimpses of Tradition Lake\u2014in winter a full body of water, in summer half mint fields and marsh and half water. There are no trails close to the water's edge, in order to protect the fragile habitat of the many woodland animals that live there, but the distance only adds to the lake's charm: a tantalizing glimpse of gentle reflections on pristine water.\n\nAfter the second interpretive sign along the trail, wheelchairs must turn back. At this point, the crunching gravel gives way to a soft trail crossed by many roots. From here, you can continue on around Tradition Lake to a junction with the Power Line Trail, turning right to return to the trailhead on it; or from the point where gravel turns to natural surface, you can take a small trail to the left to emerge on the wide, smooth Bus Road Trail. To the right, this trail takes you deeper onto the plateau to other trails and Around the Lake; to the left, it returns you, past the old Scenicruiser bus wreck, to the trailhead. And there's still so much more to see! Next, consider branching out!\n\n**ADDRESS:** 26999 SE 79th Street, Issaquah\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-90, take exit 20 (High Point Way). At the end of the exit ramp, turn right and then right again onto SE 79th Street (the frontage road). Park along the roadside. A Discover Pass is required for parking.\n\n**CONTACT:** Washington State Department of Natural Resources, (360) 825-1631, www.dnr.wa.gov. To volunteer, contact the DNR or the Washington Trails Association.\n\nCredit 54\n\n**We're in Their Home**\n\n**Cougars and bears still roam the forests bordering our eastern suburbs, but they usually stay far from people. To be safe, always keep children close. Never run from these large animals. For a bear, make noise and back away. If you happen upon a cougar, pick up children. Act tall and big. In either case, report the sighting to a park authority as soon as possible**.\n\n# **SOUTH KING**\n\n# **COUNTY**\n\n# **Renton, Kent, and Des Moines**\n\n**73** Seahurst Park\n\n**74** Gene Coulon Memorial Beach Park\n\n**75** Cedar River Trail (Northwest Section)\n\n**76** Duwamish\u2013Green River Trail\n\n**77** Des Moines Creek Trail\n\n**78** Green River Natural Resources Area\n\n**79** Spring Lake and Lake Desire Park\n\n**80** Cedar River Trail (Southeast Section)\n\n**81** Clark Lake Park\n\n**82** Soos Creek Trail\n\n**83** Lake Wilderness Arboretum\n\n**84** Saltwater State Park\n\n**85** Game Farm and Game Farm Wilderness Parks\n\n**86** White River Trail\n\n## **73 SEAHURST PARK**\n\n**Burien, 4 miles north of Des Moines**\n\n**_182 acres of forest trails and Puget Sound beach provide saltwater exploration and views of the Olympic Mountains_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **2 miles; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, playground, Environmental Science Center (ESC), picnic shelters**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved trail, restrooms, picnic shelters, ESC**\n\nA rugged ravine and a mature forest of big-leaf maples and conifers welcome you to this park by the Sound. Forest trails lace the steep fern-strewn hillsides under moss-draped trees. The beach, at high or low tide, feels wild and open. Views extend west to Vashon Island and the Olympics. Bald eagles may soar above the water, where loons and grebes dive for fish.\n\nJust minutes west of Seattle-Tacoma International Airport, this park is a microcosm of Puget Sound forest and tidal habitat. At low tide, the gently sloping beach invites exploration. Although the Seahurst beach has no rock-lined tide pools, small puddles preserve gallons of the last high tide, and in them often lounge colorful kelp crabs and red rock crabs. Also common are the smaller beach crabs (about 1.5 inches across the body), and the greenish hairy beach crab and its purplish companion. Drift logs make a natural playground for children.\n\nIf the tide is high, or if you prefer dry feet, you can stroll the gravel trail above the beach for almost a mile each way. The old seawall was removed in 2013 and 2014 to allow a natural beach to re-form. The beach and steep forest trails in the north of the park are well maintained. To the south of the parking lot, the forest trails are primitive and not maintained, but according to park rangers, it's a challenge to get lost: all trails lead to the park boundaries, to the parking lot, or back down to the beach.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 1600 SW Seahurst Park Road, Burien\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5 northbound, take exit 154 (WA 518 W\/Burien). From southbound, take exit 154B. Go west on WA 518 for 3 miles, where it changes names in Burien to SW 148th Street. Continue 0.7 miles, turn right on Ambaum Boulevard SW, go a few blocks, and turn left onto SW 144th Street. Go 3 blocks and turn right on 13th Avenue SW (signposted for the park), which becomes SW 140th Street and winds down to the park on Seahurst Park Road.\n\n**CONTACT:** Burien Parks, (206) 988-3700, www.burienwa.gov. For volunteer information, visit www.seahurstpark.org.\n\n## **74 GENE COULON MEMORIAL BEACH PARK**\n\n**Renton, 7 miles north of Kent**\n\n**_The trail and facilities on this cozy 57-acre corner of Lake Washington attract bird-watchers, beachgoers, and boaters_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1.5 miles one way; paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **Not allowed**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, playground, picnic shelters, interpretive trail, swimming beach, caf\u00e9s, tennis courts**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Trail, restrooms, buildings**\n\nHundreds of coots, their white bills poking the grass for food, waddle awkwardly over the lawn. On the water, dozens of mallards, Canada geese, and gulls cavort and swim. Lining the log booms like sentries, the gulls declare their territory with raucous calls.\n\nGene Coulon is a long sliver of a park\u2014in places, less than 100 feet wide\u2014sandwiched between Lake Washington and the Burlington Northern Santa Fe Railway. Yet it's so carefully designed that its broad, level shore walk, equipped with interpretive signs and landscaped with native plants, attracts walkers year-round. In summer you share it with boisterous children and quiet sun worshippers; in fall, winter, and spring you share it with waterfowl and fellow walkers.\n\nThough the park is most heavily used in summer for its beach and boat launch, the lakeside walk has unexpected beauty in winter. Grasses are tawny yellow against the dark blue of the lake, and among the bare-stemmed bushes hang winter's boldest ornaments: white snowberries and red rose hips. As the trail traces the contours of the lake, it crosses marshes and miniature gardens of native plantings. Before the restaurants arrived, the old pilings in Trestle Marsh marked the former railroad, cedar mill, and log-dumping site. In spring on Nature Island Bird Sanctuary, you may see nesting mallards and Canada geese. In any season, you can add distance to your stroll by exploring the boardwalks that surround the floating picnic area.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 1201 Lake Washington Boulevard N, Renton\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-405, take exit 5 (WA 900\/Issaquah, Sunset Boulevard). Go west under the freeway on NE Park Drive. Cross the railroad tracks and take a hard right at the light onto Lake Washington Boulevard N. The southern park entrance is on the left in a few hundred yards. Other parking is available if you continue north on Lake Washington Boulevard N.\n\n**CONTACT:** Renton Parks Division, (425) 430-6600, www.rentonwa.gov\n\n**All Five Senses**\n\n**Walking is a sensory experience. Teach kids to look, listen, touch, smell, and taste. Teach them the difference between edible and nonedible berries, and between touchable and untouchable plants. Be sure you know which is which**.\n\n## **75 CEDAR RIVER TRAIL (NORTHWEST SECTION)**\n\n**Renton, 6 miles north of Kent, to Jones Road bridge, 5 miles east of Renton**\n\n**_A salmon-spawning river leads from Lake Washington alongside artwork, parks, and forest_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **8 miles one way; paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **Off-leash area, otherwise on leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Cedar River Trail (Southeast Section) (Walk #80)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic areas at parks**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved trail, restrooms, picnic areas**\n\nTo experience one of the best examples of urban greenery by a river's edge, begin at Lake Washington at the mouth of the Cedar River and walk south through a manicured park. After crossing under I-405, the trail changes to a more natural, forested setting.\n\nSo close is the clear, shallow Cedar River that when it rises only a foot at flood time, water covers the walkway. (Call the city for conditions after heavy rains.) At the Downtown Renton Library, which spans the river, continue south, past sculptures and through Liberty Park. Street crossings take you under the I-405 trestle to the Renton Community Center and another trailhead in Cedar River Park, where there is a fenced off-leash area.\n\nAccess to this section begins with a pedestrian bridge across the Cedar River. From here the trail, still well paved, traverses fields and enters a cool second-growth forest. Visible through a veil of cottonwoods and alder, the Cedar River parallels the path. In summer, swallows swoop for insects over the water, and year-round, birds forage and sing in the maple and hemlock hillside to the south. In fall you may see the spawning salmon making their way upstream. The trail closely parallels the highway, becoming more a bicycler's than a walker's trail. Those with a yen for a long walk can carry on the full 12 miles to Maple Valley.\n\n**ADDRESS:** _Northern end:_ 1060 N Nishiwaki Lane, Renton _Renton Community Center:_ 1715 SE Maple Valley Highway, Renton\n\n**GETTING THERE:** _Northern end:_ From I-405 northbound, take exit 2 (WA 167\/Rainier Avenue S). Stay left to get onto Rainier Avenue S. Continue 0.4 miles. Turn right onto Airport Way, which becomes Logan Avenue N. Go 0.4 miles and turn left onto N 6th Street. In 0.2 miles turn right onto Nishiwaki Lane to reach the trailhead parking.\n\nFrom I-405 southbound, take exit 5 (WA 900 E\/Park Avenue N) and turn right onto Park Avenue, which becomes Logan Avenue. Go 0.6 miles. Turn right onto N 6th Street and proceed as above.\n\n_Renton Community Center:_ From I-405, take exit 4 (WA 169 S) and follow signs for Maple Valley Highway (WA 169). Take the first right into Cedar River Park. The trail is behind the community center.\n\n**CONTACT:** Renton Parks Division, (206) 430-6600, www.rentonwa.gov. To volunteer, contact Friends of the Cedar River Watershed: fcrw.wordpress.com.\n\nCredit 57\n\n## **76 DUWAMISH\u2013GREEN RIVER TRAIL**\n\n**Tukwila, 4 miles north of Kent, to Kent**\n\n**_An open riverside trail wanders through varied habitat and offers Cascade Range views_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **13.5 miles one way (with breaks and unconnected sections); paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles along some stretches**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Starfire Sports complex, Interurban Trail to the south**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, art, picnic shelters, playgrounds**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Trail, restrooms at Bicentennial Park, Briscoe Park, and Van Doren's Landing Park**\n\nA slice of peace between light industry, shopping malls, and freeways, the Duwamish\u2013Green River Trail teases with reminders of a less industrialized time in the Tukwila and Kent region.\n\nThe best starting point is either toward the north end at Bicentennial Park in Tukwila or toward the south end at Van Doren's Landing Park in Kent.\n\nFrom Bicentennial Park the trail goes 0.5 miles north along the river, crosses under I-405, and goes into the 54-acre Starfire Sports complex (which includes Fort Dent Park). For the next mile, it skirts the landscaped edge of the park and crosses an old-style trestle footbridge that marks the confluence of the (now mainly dry) Black River and the Green River. The trail follows the Green River north another 3 miles.\n\nHeading south from Bicentennial Park, the trail hugs the riverbank. Where the river makes a sharp U-curve at S 180th Street, a lovely footbridge spans it, offering walks on either side. (If you don't cross, the trail soon peters out into industry.) On the south side, a left turn takes you to a trailhead on West Valley Road S; a right turn takes you south into Kent and, in about a mile or so, to Briscoe Park at S 190th Street. Here you'll find park amenities, including disabled access and a launch for hand-carried boats.\n\nIf you start at Van Doren's Landing Park and walk south, you can make a side trip east on the Puget Power Trail into the Green River Natural Resources Area (Walk #78), 300 acres of wetland and bird-watching at its best. South from Van Doren's Landing Park, a short walk on Russell Road brings you to another peaceful stretch starting at Russell Woods Park, until you reach the junction with the Interurban Trail near S 259th Street.\n\nFall and early winter visitors can enjoy the thrill of watching hundreds of salmon swim the river to their spawning grounds. Contact the Washington Department of Fish & Wildlife for more information.\n\n**ADDRESS:** _Bicentennial Park:_ 6000 Christiansen Road, Tukwila; _Van Doren's Landing Park:_ 21861 Russell Road, Kent\n\n**GETTING THERE:** _Bicentennial Park:_ From I-405, take exit 1 (WA 181 S\/W Valley Highway). Go south on W Valley Highway for 0.4 miles. Turn right on Strander Boulevard. Cross the river and turn right into the park.\n\n_Van Doren's Landing Park:_ Follow the directions above to W Valley Highway. Continue south on W Valley Highway, which becomes 68th Avenue S. Turn right on S 212th Street. Go 1.25 miles. Turn left on Russell Road. Go 0.5 miles; the park is on the right.\n\n**CONTACT:** Tukwila Parks and Recreation Department, (206) 433-1800, www.tukwilawa.gov\/\u200bresidents\/\u200bparks-recreation; Kent Parks, Recreation, and Community Services Department, (253) 856-5100, www.kentwa.gov\/\u200bparksandrecreation\n\n**Petering Out?**\n\n**Keep energy up with water and snacks. Reward kids for reaching landmarks like hilltops or streams. Tell them how far they've walked (in miles!) and congratulate them**.\n\n## **77 DES MOINES CREEK TRAIL**\n\n**SeaTac, 2 miles north of Des Moines, to Des Moines, 1 mile north of downtown**\n\n**_A gentle trail through 96 acres of woodland along Des Moines Creek joins with 60 acres of beach park_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **2 miles one way; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, fishing pier, historical information, picnic area, playground at Des Moines Beach Park; none in northern end**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved trail, restrooms at marina**\n\nIn a deep green cleft in the suburbs south of Seattle-Tacoma International Airport, Des Moines Creek Trail follows the bubbling, salmon-spawning stream toward Puget Sound. Fully paved all the way to Des Moines Beach Park, this forested trail can be walked either downstream or upstream, the grade fairly gentle either way.\n\nFrom SeaTac the trail leads south between buttresses of blackberries, appearing to be nothing more than a paved right-of-way for the city utility cars. But as it rounds a corner and begins to slope gently downward, the berries give way to ferns, and the alders disappear under the overhanging canopy of big-leaf maples and Douglas firs. After about 0.25 miles of walking, the sound of churning water can be heard along with calls of forest birds. And then the stream appears, deep in its own ravine, clear and inviting as it flows over native rocks. Nature is reclaiming the area cleared of houses years ago in anticipation of airport runway expansion.\n\nThe paved trail means good walking year-round, but for those venturing off the pavement, the many steep dirt paths on the high hillside to the west become impassable in wet weather. No problem, though, for the mountain bikers who careen along the dirt trails in all weather, keen on sliding, jumping, and climbing the convoluted maze of byways. Fortunately, the paved trail by the creek has a center line so that bicycle and foot traffic is fairly orderly. Side trails over the creek and up the hillside lead to bordering neighborhoods.\n\nClosely hugging the creek near the fenced-off wastewater treatment facility, the trail dives back into the forest and descends gently, passing under Marine View Drive until it reaches the historical buildings and open lawn of Des Moines Beach Park. Here you leave the scent of wet forest and inhale the rich heady scent of seawater. If the tide is out, there are acres of beach to explore and wading birds to watch. Surf scoters, goldeneyes, and grebes dabble, paddle, and muck about in the food-rich estuarine soup. Gulls call, cheer, and squabble over clams as the creek makes its last burbling yards to the sea.\n\n**ADDRESS:** _Northern end:_ 2151 S 200th Street, SeaTac; _Beach end:_ 22030 Cliff Avenue S, Des Moines\n\n**GETTING THERE:** _Northern end:_ From I-5, take exit 151 (S 200th Street\/Military Road). Go west on 200th Street until the road dips sharply. Find trailhead parking on the left.\n\n_Beach end:_ From I-5, take exit 149 (WA 516 W\/Kent). Go west on Kent\u2013Des Moines Road for 2 miles, and merge right into Marine View Drive S. Go about 5 blocks and turn left on S 223rd Street. This drops down the hill and becomes Cliff Street, which enters the park.\n\n**CONTACT:** SeaTac Parks and Recreation Department, (206) 973-4780, www.ci.seatac.wa.us; Des Moines Parks, Recreation, and Senior Services Department, (206) 870-6527, www.desmoineswa.gov\n\n## **78 GREEN RIVER NATURAL RESOURCES AREA**\n\n**4 miles northwest of downtown Kent; 7 miles south of Renton**\n\n**_Watch for wildlife from a viewing tower in this 300-acre restored refuge and open space_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1.3 miles; gravel**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **Not allowed**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Kent Puget Power Trail along southern boundary, Duwamish\u2013Green River Trail (Walk #76)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Parking, viewing platforms; picnic area at adjoining Van Doren's Landing Park**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Wheelchair-friendly gravel trail**\n\nLet the welcome sun warm you as you stroll this open space and restored wetlands in western Kent. Listen for the sound of wind in the tall grasses and the call of red-winged blackbirds in the reeds, and keep an eye out for evidence of coyotes\u2014fur-filled scat on the pathways. On clear days Mount Rainier forms a dramatic backdrop to the southeast.\n\nPreviously a wastewater lagoon system with storm-water detention ponds, the Green River Natural Resources Area (also known as Kent Ponds) has undergone a face-lift with the addition of thousands of young native shrubs, tree plantings, and wheelchair-friendly paths. The wetlands and surrounding meadows are a natural breeding, brooding, and feeding site for more than 160 bird species, and are home to more than fifty mammal species, including river otter, beaver, coyote, and deer. At 300 acres, this is one of the largest man-made wildlife refuges in the United States.\n\nFor the best bird-watching, fall and winter are good times to visit, when the grasses are low and the pond is more visible. Flocks of migrating birds use the area as a rest and staging place on their way south. On the water you may see ruddy ducks, great blue herons, and American coots; look overhead or on the bare tree branches for merlins and bald eagles. Two tall viewing platforms accessible from the Green River Natural Resources Area paths and one accessed from Kent's paved Puget Power Trail on the southern boundary offer bird's-eye views over the meadows. Due to the sensitive nature of the Green River Natural Resources Area, dogs are not allowed in the reserve.\n\n**ADDRESS:** _Van Doren's Landing Park:_ 21861 Russell Road S, Kent\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-405, take exit 2 (WA 167 Renton\/Auburn) and head south on WA 167. Go 4 miles and take the S 212th Street exit. Turn right and go 2 miles. Turn left onto Russell Road. More parking is at Van Doren's Landing Park, 0.5 miles away.\n\nFrom I-5, take exit 152 (Orillia Road). Turn east on Orillia Road, which becomes S 212th Street. Cross the Green River and turn right on Russell Road.\n\n**CONTACT:** Kent Parks, Recreation, and Community Services Department; (253) 856-5100; www.kentwa.gov\/\u200bparksandrecreation\n\n## **79 SPRING LAKE AND LAKE DESIRE PARK**\n\n**8.5 miles southeast of downtown Renton**\n\n**_Get a workout climbing through 390 acres of lush forest to a rocky outcrop for a great view of snowy Mount Rainier_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **4.5 miles; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles and horses except on Peak Trail**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **McGarvey Park to the north**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **None**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **None**\n\nRising a full 400 feet above the placid waters of Spring Lake and Lake Desire, smooth boulder\u2013topped Mount Echo beckons walkers with a yen for a workout and a view. This forested King County park is home to bobcats, owls, bears, and foxes, yet lies quietly above the nearby recreational lakes and neighborhoods of Maple Valley.\n\nThis park is a walkers' destination, with nary a playground or sports field in sight. One comes here to traipse in the best of the Northwest nature and forest. Next to the small parking lot at the base of the trail, an informational sign helps you choose your walking trails. Head up the service road (wonderfully soft and more like a wide trail than a road), then cut off to the right into the forest on the signposted Peak Trail. So steep is this final 200-foot ascent to Mount Echo's viewpoint that neither horses nor bicycles are allowed. A well-maintained trail of log steps leads you up and around the hillside until you come to the broad, rock-surfaced peak. On clear days look south into the face of glacier-covered Mount Rainier.\n\nA winter walk promises glimpses of Lake Desire far below as you peer through the bare branches of the alders and maples. The lower forest is lush with sword ferns that line the gentle ravine, through which a small brook tumbles. In the green seasons you'll be walking through a sylvan wonderland of tall canopied trees and huge old-growth stumps amid mahonia and sword ferns. Even then, the view from the peak is clear for great mountain scenery.\n\nIf you're not up for a hill climb, meander the trails to the north of the trailhead, or take the 1.3-mile loop through the bog and wetlands of Spring Lake to the south.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 18800 West Spring Lake Drive, Renton (approximate)\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-405, take exit 4 (WA 169\/Maple Valley). Go 6.3 miles on the Maple Valley Highway and turn right onto 196th Avenue SE. Go 1.4 miles and turn right onto SE 183rd Street, then right again onto E Spring Lake Drive. Stay right, merge onto W Spring Lake Drive, and follow it around the lake to the end of the road. To park on the left by the boat launch a Discover Pass is required, but it is not required at the trailhead.\n\n**CONTACT:** King County Parks, (206) 477-4527, www.kingcounty.gov\/\u200brecreation\/\u200bparks\n\n## **80 CEDAR RIVER TRAIL (SOUTHEAST SECTION)**\n\n**Maple Valley, 8 miles east of Kent**\n\n**_Watch birds and spawning salmon along this forested rails-to-trails path_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **6 miles one way; paved and natural**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles, horses**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Green-to-Cedar Rivers Trail; Cedar River Trail (Northwest Section) (Walk #75)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms and picnic areas at Landsburg Park Trailhead**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved section at Maple Valley end; some access at Landsburg Park**\n\nLined with cottonwoods, alders, and mixed conifers, this converted rails-to-trails path is wide and smooth, and, being raised above the surrounding wetland, offers year-round dry-footed walking. A wild cry might break the stillness as a bald eagle rises from the river, a salmon clutched in its talons. In summer, golden-crowned kinglets call from the trees, swallows dive for insects, and dippers bob along the riverbanks like tireless windup toys.\n\nCredit 61\n\nRunning a course straighter than the Cedar River, the trail takes you alternately from forest to riverside to bridge. Beginning across from Foley's Produce, the trail is paved all the way north to Renton. If you walk or bicycle, you can go as long as your feet and time hold out. On this stretch, the trail closely borders the Maple Valley Highway. See Walk #75, Cedar River Trail (Northwest Section), for another lovely stretch of regional trail.\n\nHeading southeast from Foley's, the pavement ends near the intersection with the Green-to-Cedar Rivers Trail (also known as the Lake Wilderness Trail). From here, the trail takes on its most natural surroundings. After passing a stone quarry and Rock Creek, the trail enters ever wilder landscape as you close with the river. About 1 mile from Landsburg Park (the easternmost trailhead), a reconstructed 1908 railroad bridge spans the river. High above the water, you have an eagle's-eye view both up- and downstream to cliffs, eddies, and rapids. From here you can continue on the raised railbed or, river height permitting, explore the sandy path that traces the river's edge to Landsburg Park.\n\n**ADDRESS:** _Foley's Produce:_ 21419 SE Renton Maple Valley Road, Maple Valley (public parking is across the street); _Landsburg Park:_ SE 253rd Street and Landsburg Road SE, Ravensdale\n\n**GETTING THERE:** _Foley's Produce:_ From I-405, take exit 4 (WA 169\/Maple Valley). Go south on WA 169 for 9.9 miles. The park is on the east side of the road, across from Foley's Produce.\n\nFrom I-5 north, take exit 142A (WA 18 Auburn\/North Bend) and go east 15.6 miles on WA 18. Take the SE 231st Street exit and follow signs to WA 169 (Maple Valley). Turn north on WA 169, cross under WA 18, and park on the right, across from Foley's Produce.\n\n_Landsburg Park:_ Follow the directions above to WA 169, but stay on WA 169 past WA 18 and turn left onto SE 216th Street. Go east for 3 miles and turn right onto 276th Avenue SE (Issaquah-Hobart Road). Go 2.4 miles to Landsburg Park. The trail begins on the west side of the road.\n\n**CONTACT:** King County Parks, (206) 477-4527, www.kingcounty.gov\/\u200brecreation\/\u200bparks. To volunteer, contact Friends of the Cedar River Watershed: fcrw.wordpress.com.\n\n## **81 CLARK LAKE PARK**\n\n**4.5 miles east of downtown Kent; 18 miles south of Renton**\n\n**_This 130-acre park provides wetlands, lakes, meadows, groves of forest, and great mountain views_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **2 miles; boardwalk, natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Benches, interpretive trail, viewing and fishing dock**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **None**\n\nLeave the edge of suburbia and walk through restored meadows where plump heads of lavender, clover, and bright-yellow buttercups brighten the summer greenery. The land is in transition, slowly being reclaimed from its long-ago use as farmland. A quiet dell of Douglas fir and hemlock resounds with birdsong, and bird boxes offer shelter to nesting flickers. Nestled in the center of this passive-use park, 7-acre Clark Lake is home to native bass and rainbow trout. The graveled paths lead you through meadows and shady stands of forest, while nearer to the lake's edge you walk on securely built boardwalks over sensitive wetlands and out to the lake's edge on a viewing and fishing platform. The trail rises from the lake to the north and east, and even with summer's luxuriant growth, the lake is visible. In summer, the once-domestic cherry trees drape with ripe red fruit, which is plundered by resident raccoons. In fall, the leaves stand brilliant with color against a backdrop of blue sky and the white cone of Mount Rainier to the south, and coho salmon may be seen in the stream.\n\nIn years past, the stream was home to both coho and Chinook salmon; with the help of volunteers, the stream is being cleared of invasive plants and replanted to provide improved habitat for the fish and other native wildlife. The original 29 acres were first annexed by the city in the early 1990s, and since then Clark Lake Park has been growing bit by bit as more land is purchased. Eagle Scout troops have built information kiosks at the entrances, and scores of volunteers have created boardwalks, fencing, and loop trails. Although the tannin-brown waters of the lake are tempting on hot summer days, swimming is not allowed due to underwater natural hazards.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 12540 SE 240th Street, Kent (approximate)\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-405, take exit 2 (WA 167 S). Go south on WA 167 for 4.2 miles. Exit at 212th Street SE. Turn left and follow 212th Street SE as it becomes 208th Street SE. In 1.8 miles turn right onto 116th Avenue SE. Go 2 miles and turn left onto SE 240th Street. The park is in 0.6 miles on the right.\n\nOther trailheads with on-street parking are on 120th Avenue SE and SE 248th Street.\n\n**CONTACT:** Kent Parks, Recreation, and Community Services Department; (253) 856-5100; www.kentwa.gov\/\u200bparksandrecreation\n\n**Pack It In, Pack It Out**\n\n**Many parks and most natural-surface trails have no trash collection. Carry a plastic bag in your pocket or a day pack for trash. If you've got a dog on leash, you should be carrying plastic bags for scooping**.\n\n## **82 SOOS CREEK TRAIL**\n\n**4 miles east of downtown Kent**\n\n**_Walk miles of paved trail along a creek and through 775 acres of forested wetlands_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **7.5 miles one way; paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles, horses (horses may be on side trail)**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, brochure, interpretive walks, picnic tables; playgrounds at trailheads**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Trail (though parts do not meet ADA standards), restrooms**\n\nJust inches above the marshes, this paved path cuts a straight dark line through one of the finest wetlands in South King County. Chickadees call _chicka dee dee dee_ from the branches of alder and oak. A red-tailed hawk soars overhead. Soos Creek Trail is a walker's hidden paradise just minutes from downtown Kent.\n\nMarshes like this one have an all-season appeal. In summer the trail is busy with skaters, cyclists, and walkers, and the marsh plants are tall and thick with green stalks and golden-brown cattails. The landscape feels enclosed and intimate. In winter the wet meadow areas predominate, with hardhack, alder, willow, and many bird species. In winter, too, you can see through the brush to the hillsides of fir and hemlock that rise from the creek.\n\nThe park's shape is defined by meandering Soos Creek. The northern end is near Gary Grant Park northeast of Kent; the southern end is near Lake Meridian Park on Kent-Kangley Road. Along the length of the trail, you pass through several distinct types of wetlands. Ponds are home to great blue herons, ducks, geese, cattails, rushes, skunk cabbage, and wild roses. Scrub wetlands remain flooded year-round. In the forested wetland you'll walk beside vine maple, cedar, salmonberry, and elderberry; then you climb to the upland forest, with its second-growth cedars, maples, and ferns.\n\nOriginally owned by the Northern Pacific Railroad, the land was logged in the late 1800s by large timber companies. After that, Finnish pioneers arrived, clearing the land with oxen and horses to raise fruits and vegetables. Look for remnants of the old orchards along the trail.\n\n**ADDRESS:** _Gary Grant Park:_ SE 208th Street and 136th Avenue SE, Kent; _Trailhead near Lake Meridian Park:_ SE 266th Street and 148th Avenue SE\n\n**GETTING THERE:** _Gary Grant Park:_ From I-405, take exit 2 (WA 167 S\/Auburn). Go south 3.9 miles on WA 167. Turn left (east) on SE 212th Street, which becomes SE 208th Street, and find the park trailhead in 3 miles.\n\nFrom I-5 northbound, take exit 149A (WA 516, Kent); from southbound, take exit 149 (WA 516, Kent). Head east on WA 516 and exit onto WA 167 N. Go north on WA 167 for 2 miles, turn right on SE 212th Street, and proceed as above.\n\n**CONTACT:** King County Parks, (206) 477-4527, www.kingcounty.gov\/\u200brecreation\/\u200bparks. Check the website for information on interpretive walks.\n\n## **83 LAKE WILDERNESS ARBORETUM**\n\n**Maple Valley, 8 miles east of Kent**\n\n**_Walk 42 acres of garden paths, an old railroad grade, and forest trails to the edge of Lake Wilderness_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **3 miles total; gravel, natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only on self-guided loop; horses and bicycles on Lake Wilderness Trail (also known as the Green-to-Cedar Rivers Trail)**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash; not allowed on nature loop trail**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Green-to-Cedar Rivers Trail**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Nature trail brochure and map, plant sales; Lake Wilderness Park offers restrooms, picnic area, beach, meeting rooms, playgrounds, tennis**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Garden trails**\n\nLocated on the edge of Lake Wilderness Park, the Lake Wilderness Arboretum leases land from the county for a show garden with walking trails and interpretive information. In one walk, you can enjoy both an ornamental garden of native plants and a natural second-growth forest typical of the Cascade foothills.\n\nThe Lake Wilderness Arboretum Foundation, a nonprofit volunteer group, has created these gardens to provide examples of native plants and to teach why it's important, when choosing nonnative ornamental plants, to select those that will thrive here without extra water or fertilizer. On the garden trails, you can see a wide variety of rhododendrons, both species and hybrids, and showy trees such as the purple-leafed smoke tree and unusual maples. Spring is, of course, spectacular with color, but each season offers some new and colorful changes in the garden. Volunteers are needed\u2014there are always more plantings and projects in the works.\n\nNorth across the old railroad grade, you enter a mature second-growth forest. On the self-guided loop, you can read about and observe this transitional forest, in which the more shade-tolerant western hemlocks and western red cedars are slowly replacing the Douglas firs. From high in the canopy, secretive warblers sing and tiny brown creepers spiral their way up the trunks in search of bark-dwelling insects. Orange lichen paint intriguing patterns on the trunks of the big-leaf maples.\n\nTo extend your walk, head either east or west on the railroad grade, part of the Green-to-Cedar Rivers trail. This raised gravel walk is dry even in the wettest months and maintains a natural forest setting for more than a mile in each direction. To the northwest it joins the Cedar River Trail (Walk #80) in 1.6 miles.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 22520 SE 248th Street, Maple Valley\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-405, take exit 4 (WA 169\/Maple Valley). Go east for 10 miles on WA 169 to Maple Valley. After crossing WA 18, turn right on Witte Road. Go 0.8 miles and turn left on SE 248th Street. Go 0.5 miles to the arboretum next to Lake Wilderness Park.\n\nFrom I-5, take exit 142A (WA 18 Auburn\/North Bend). Exit WA 18 at WA 169. Turn right on SE 231st Street, then right (south) on WA 169. Go 0.3 miles, turn right again (south) on Witte Road, and proceed as above.\n\n**CONTACT:** Maple Valley Parks and Recreation Department, (425) 432-9953, www.maplevalleywa.gov\/\u200bdepartments-services\/\u200bparks-recreation. For volunteer information, visit www.lakewilderness\u00adarboretum.org.\n\n## **84 SALTWATER STATE PARK**\n\n**2 miles south of downtown Des Moines**\n\n**_Explore 88 acres along McSorley Creek from forest to beach_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **2 miles; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic areas, playground, underwater park; summer only: camping, concession stand**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Restrooms, camping, picnic areas**\n\nAt low tide, 1,500 feet of rocky beach creates a multitude of tide pools. Here red and yellow starfish cling, crabs scuttle, and snails creep. Inland, cool, shaded forest lets you wander over a hillside to a bluff overlooking Puget Sound and seagoing vessels.\n\nOne of the most popular state parks on the sound, Saltwater sees upward of three-quarters of a million visitors a year. The nice thing is, they come mostly in summer and on warm weekends, and most of them visit the beach. With careful timing, you can be virtually alone on the beach, communing with clams and mussels or watching the antics of the seagulls and crows as they drop the mollusks from the air to the concrete for an instant breakfast. At high tide, walk the several hundred yards of paved walkway next to the seawall.\n\nFor a forest stroll, leave from the playground and follow the soft-surfaced path along the hillside under a mix of Douglas fir and big-leaf maple. This forest was last logged more than 75 years ago, and the second-growth trees are reaching a hefty size. The lush undergrowth helps to muffle the sounds of visitors and the hum of traffic on the bridge overhead. The trail loops back to the McSorley Creek ravine at the eastern end of the campground. Other trails lead from the valley, make loops, and return. On the north side of the camping area, a footbridge crosses the creek, which once again is seeing a salmon run.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 25205 8th Place S, Des Moines\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 149 (Kent-Des Moines\/WA 516). Go west on WA 516 for 1.9 miles to Marine View Drive. Turn left, go 1.2 miles to S 252nd Street and 8th Place S, and turn right into the park. A Discover Pass is required for parking.\n\n**CONTACT:** Washington State Parks, Saltwater State Park Office, (253) 661-4956, www.parks.wa.gov\n\nCredit 64\n\n**What Is That?**\n\n**Find out by joining a naturalist-led walk. Most are free. Call your city or county parks department for information. Parks also offer classes in outdoor-related topics such as gardening, birding, geology, animal care, naturalist studies, and science. Fees may apply**.\n\n## **85 GAME FARM AND GAME FARM WILDERNESS PARKS**\n\n**Auburn, 9.5 miles southeast of Kent**\n\n**_Glacier-fed White River cuts through 120 acres of landscaped and wild parks_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **4 miles; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **White River Trail (Walk #86)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, playgrounds, art, picnic shelters, playing fields, sports courts; disc golf and camping in Game Farm Wilderness Park**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved trail, restrooms, amphitheater, picnic shelters**\n\nTwo nonidentical twin parks line the sides of the milky, glacier-fed White River (which becomes the Stuck River as it passes the parks). Here you can choose civilization, amenities, and landscaping at Game Farm Park in the north, or a wilder, less gentrified park in the south.\n\nGame Farm Park (named for its past history as a site on which shooting stock was raised) throbs with activity. Colonnades of landscaping trees border playing fields that are interconnected with more than 2 miles of paved walkways. Come for people-watching on weekends and for solitude on damp winter days. Park near the amphitheater at the southern end and walk past the picnic shelters toward the river. The almost-century-old diversion dam divides park landscaping from river wilderness. Walk along it, or step over it to find an unmaintained but well-used path on the riverbank. Follow this path of sand and rounded river rocks east along the river. Side trails lead to possible wading and picnic areas on the shores. (See Don't Get Carried Away.) Beaver-toppled trees, with their telltale gnawing marks, lie jumbled in the river, awaiting removal by the rodents or the next flood.\n\nAcross the river in Game Farm Wilderness Park (accessed via the R Street SE bridge), a campground, restrooms, and picnic shelters are the only amenities. An actively used disc-golf course parallels the sand-and-rock path that leads along the river. Across the water, 150-foot-high bluffs are a geological window to the past, while today's trees cling tenaciously to the sandy walls. West from the day-use area, a short paved trail invites walkers, baby strollers, and wheelchairs.\n\nWatch for dippers\u2014small brown birds that bob and hunt for food along the rocky rapids. Breathe deeply of this fresh river-scented air.\n\n**ADDRESS:** _Game Farm Park:_ 3030 R Street SE, Auburn; _Game Farm Wilderness Park:_ 2401 Stuck River Drive, Auburn\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-405, take exit 2 (WA 167 S\/Auburn). Go about 10 miles south on WA 167 to WA 18. Go east on WA 18 to the WA 164 (Auburn Way) exit. Head south for 0.9 miles and stay left for Howard Road. Go 0.25 miles and turn right onto R Street SE. Go 0.7 miles to Game Farm Park on your left. For Game Farm Wilderness Park continue on R Street SE, cross the river, and turn left.\n\nFrom I-5, take exit 142A (WA 18 E\/Auburn). Go 4 miles east on WA 18, take the WA 164 (Auburn Way) exit, and proceed as above.\n\n**CONTACT:** Auburn Parks, Arts, and Recreation Department; (206) 931-3043; www.auburnwa.gov\/\u200bthings_to_do\/\u200bparks_trails.htm\n\n## **86 WHITE RIVER TRAIL**\n\n**Auburn, 11 miles south of Kent**\n\n**_Follow the blue-white waters of the White\/Stuck River on a paved trail bordered by cottonwoods and conifers_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **2.2 miles; paved, natural**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles; horses on soft-surface parallel trail**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Game Farm Wilderness Park (Walk #85)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, playground, art, picnic area**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved trail, restrooms**\n\nThere is something both invigorating and peaceful about walking by the side of a swiftly flowing river. The slow pace of foot travel contrasts with the swift motion of the river, the energetic sound of moving water, and the sight of a lone rock fighting the force of the river flowing over it. Above and surrounding it all is the freshwater-scented breeze. The White River Trail has the added attraction of a smooth, paved walkway so that you can watch the river as you walk, without being overly mindful of your feet. Perhaps you'll spot a great blue heron wading in an eddy or a bright-blue kingfisher perched on a maple branch, searching for its next meal. If you begin in Roegner Park, you can follow a loop trail to the west, return to the park and its amenities, and then walk upstream as far as you like before retracing your steps.\n\nIs it called the White River or the Stuck River? The answer is both. Until the end of the nineteenth century, the White River, together with the Green and Black Rivers, formed the Duwamish River, which emptied into Elliott Bay in Seattle. The Stuck River flowed toward Tacoma. Farmers in the Kent Valley, forever worried about flooding, used to dynamite the rivers, and in one mishap, they diverted much of the flow of the White River to the Stuck Valley. A huge flood in 1906 changed the landscape further, and the White River was diverted permanently. Today the White and the Stuck are the same river, and they flow into the Puyallup River en route to Tacoma's Commencement Bay. The milky color of the river is from the finely ground rock, the glacial till, that is carried by the water as it flows from the glaciers on Mount Rainier.\n\n**ADDRESS:** _Roegner Park:_ 601 Oravetz Road, Auburn\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 2 (WA 167\/Kent\/Auburn). Go south on WA 167. After 14 miles, take the exit toward Algona Pacific. Go 0.3 miles and turn left onto Ellingson Road. Go 1.5 miles and turn right onto A Street SE. Go 0.7 miles and turn left onto Lakeland Hills Way. Turn left onto Oravetz Road SE. Go 0.4 miles. Roegner Park is on the left after the high school.\n\nTo begin at Game Farm Wilderness Park, 2401 Stuck River Drive, Auburn, follow directions for Walk #85.\n\n**CONTACT:** Auburn Parks, Arts, and Recreation Department; (253) 931-3043; www.auburnwa.gov\/\u200bthings_to_do\/\u200bparks_trails.htm\n\n**Don't Get Carried Away**\n\n**Rivers can change character rapidly from shallow and placid to raging, murky torrents during and after local storms or Cascade storms that increase the snowmelt. Don't walk or play along riverbanks during heavy rain or when flood warnings are in effect. Both controlled rivers (such as the Cedar, Green, and White) and free-flowing rivers (such as the Snoqualmie, Carbon, and Snohomish) are potentially hazardous**.\n\n# **TACOMA**\n\n**87** Burton Acres Park\n\n**88** Sehmel Homestead Park\n\n**89** Point Defiance Park\n\n**90** Dash Point State Park\n\n**91** West Hylebos Wetlands Park\n\n**92** Titlow Park\n\n**93** Wright Park\n\n**94** Tacoma Nature Center\n\n**95** Chambers Bay Loop\n\n**96** Chambers Creek Canyon Trail\n\n**97** Fort Steilacoom Park\n\n**98** Wapato Park\n\n**99** Swan Creek Park\n\n**100** Clarks Creek Park\n\n**101** Foothills Trail\n\n**102** Spanaway Park and Bresemann Forest\n\n**103** Nathan Chapman Memorial Trail\n\n## **87 BURTON ACRES PARK**\n\n**Vashon Island, 14 miles north of Tacoma (with ferry ride)**\n\n**_Leave the beach on Quartermaster Harbor to wander 68 acres of cathedral-forest trails_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1.1-mile loop, including center trails; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, boat launch, boat rentals, picnic tables**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Restrooms**\n\nEnter a forest cathedral almost a century old. The deeply furrowed bark of the old Douglas firs leads your eyes upward. Between the pillar-like trunks, neat clusters of sword fern and Oregon grape grow as if arranged like offerings. Walk silently on paths filled with fir needles. The big-leaf maples grow multiple trunks like candelabras.\n\nSaved from the enthusiasm of nineteenth-century farmers for burning stumps and clearing acreage, these 68 acres belonged to Miles Hatch, a Tacoma businessman who started a college at Burton, where he pioneered in the late 1800s. Although the park has a small beach, picnic area, and boat launch, its allure lies in the forest. Enter it from either of two paths that lead from Burton Drive across from the boat launch. By turning right every time the trail splits, you can experiment with making a loop. If you find that your choice has led you to a house, retrace your steps to the junction and take the other path.\n\nThe northern section (the Enchanted Forest) has an open and spacious feel. The squat stumps with their rectangular springboard holes look like sylvan dwarves in a Disney cartoon. Fallen giant trees show the shallow root system of the Douglas firs and how easily they are uprooted in winter windstorms.\n\nAs you take the loop trail, you'll notice subtle changes. In the western section (Ivy Land), English ivy has invaded from the bordering neighborhoods, threatening to engulf the shrubbery and stumps. The brush, too, is higher, composed of blackberry and nettle, and the trees trunks are smaller. A gentle decline in the trail takes you back into the past, back into the cathedral of older trees.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 8900 SW Harbor Drive, Burton, Vashon Island\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From the Tahlequah ferry terminal (southern Vashon Island), go north on Vashon Highway SW about 4.8 miles. Turn right on SW Burton Drive and go north for 0.4 miles. Turn left onto 97th Avenue SW and continue around the peninsula as it becomes SW Harbor Drive. At the boat launch and park sign, find the trail on the right.\n\nFrom the northern Vashon Island ferry terminal, go south on Vashon Highway SW about 8.8 miles. Turn left on SW Burton Drive and proceed as above.\n\n**CONTACT:** Vashon Park District, (206) 463-9602, www.vashonparks.org\n\n**Seashells in the Forest?**\n\n**Chances are, these shells were brought not by children but by birds. Northwest crows and gulls have learned that the easiest way to open their shellfish meals is to let gravity and impact do the work. They pick up a shell from the beach, fly high, and drop it\u2014repeatedly\u2014until lunch is laid out for them. Oysters on the half shell, anyone?**\n\n## **88 SEHMEL HOMESTEAD PARK**\n\n**Gig Harbor, 10 miles northwest of Tacoma**\n\n**_Circumnavigate 98 acres of historic homestead on boardwalks and soft forest trails_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **4.4 miles; paved, boardwalk, natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic areas, playground, ball fields, art, amphitheater, heritage garden**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved walkways, amphitheater, restrooms**\n\nUnlike many ball field\u2013centric parks that offer a few walking paths in and around the fields, Sehmel Homestead has not forgotten its rural origins. Though most visitors to this 98-acre park outside Gig Harbor come for the sports fields or playground, those with a yen for some quiet walking will seek the well-signposted, broad, and well-maintained paths that encircle the park.\n\nTo visit the best of the park, begin in the northern parking lot near the grass-stepped amphitheater, and take the perimeter loop in a clockwise direction. A few boardwalks lead over marshy wetlands, then the trail enters a sparse forest behind the soccer fields. But carry on south and keep your left hand on the wall for the best wetlands and forest. On a quiet day you may see deer or catch the red and white flash and _rat-a-tat-tat_ of the pileated woodpecker. Sparse forest gives way to ancient stumps cut by decades of springboard notches, now draped in a carpet of moss and sporting large healthy trees atop the massive stumps. Cedar groves will beguile even reluctant walkers with their rich pungent scent and soft padding of needles underfoot.\n\nThe Sehmel Homestead is a legacy passed down through four generations. In 1891 Henry Sehmel, an immigrant from Germany, filed for homesteading papers on 160 acres of land. He and his wife, Dora, raised their children there, as did the next three generations. The Sehmels were active community citizens, involved in midwifery, logging, and produce farming. After 110 years of family ownership, Henry and Dora's great-grandson Bill Sehmel helped the county plan the layout and facilities of the park after its purchase in 2002.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 10123 78th Avenue NW, Gig Harbor\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 132 (WA 16\/Gig Harbor\/Bremerton). Go west on WA 16 for 12.2 miles and take the exit onto Burnham Drive NW. In 0.2 miles at the traffic circle, take the fourth exit to stay on Burnham Drive. At the next circle take the first exit to continue on Burnham. In 300 feet turn left onto Sehmel Drive NW and go 1.6 miles. Turn left onto 78th Avenue NW, where you will see the park on the left. Trail maps are available in the PenMet Parks office on-site.\n\n**CONTACT:** PenMet Parks, (253) 858-3400, www.penmetparks.org\n\n## **89 POINT DEFIANCE PARK**\n\n**5 miles northwest of downtown Tacoma**\n\n**_Stroll along 700 acres of forest trails and saltwater beach; visit gardens and the Fort Nisqually Living History Museum_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **11 miles; gravel, natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only in forest; bicycles on paved trails**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, beach, gardens, picnic shelters, playgrounds, aquarium, children's entertainment, logging museum, zoo**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **The Promenade (1 mile, Owen Beach to Point Defiance Marina boathouse), park facilities (sawdust-covered trails in Never Never Land)**\n\nIt would be hard to choose one trail above all others in this 700-acre park on the northwest tip of Tacoma. Whatever your pleasure in walking trails, you'll find it here. Near the main entrance at N Park Avenue and Pearl Street, paved trails circulate throughout the formal park zone with its pond and gardens. Explore the world-class Rose Garden, the Japanese Garden, and, for a steeper walk, the Native Garden. Stroll the paved Promenade from the boathouse to Owen Beach on Commencement Bay. On Five Mile Drive, the Rhododendron Garden, ablaze with color in the early spring, leads to more wooded paths. High in the interior of the park, the Spine Trail, bisecting the park through its wild old forest, provides quiet on natural trails and an intimacy with nature not found near the beach and picnic areas.\n\nFor views of the water and the Olympics, try the walk north from the Vashon Island viewpoint on Five Mile Drive. This wooded trail passes wondrous old Douglas firs, cedars, and hemlocks. The earthen path muffles sounds, and as the trail curves farther from the road, the silence settles around you. Because of the age of this forest (more than 100 years), the undergrowth is sparse and a carpet of needles lies on the forest floor. Go past the footpath to the beach, continuing until you come to the immense Mountaineer Tree. This Douglas fir, the largest living tree in the park, measures 218 feet tall and is more than 400 years old. If it survives the forces of nature (and human vandalism), it could still be standing 500 years from now.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 5400 N Pearl Street, Tacoma\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 132 (WA 16 W\/Gig Harbor\/ Bremerton). Go 3.6 miles west on WA 16 to the 6th Avenue\/Pearl Street exit. Turn left on 6th Avenue, then right on Pearl Street\/WA 163. Go north 3 miles on N Pearl Street, which ends at the Point Defiance Park entrance. On Saturday and Sunday mornings, the Five Mile Drive outer loop is closed to motorized vehicles, but other access points are open.\n\n**CONTACT:** Metro Parks Tacoma, (253) 305-1000, www.metroparkstacoma.org\n\nCredit 68\n\n**Who Was Douglas?**\n\n**David Douglas was a Scottish naturalist who explored the Pacific Northwest (then called the Columbia District) with the permission of the Hudson's Bay Company in the 1820s. His name is linked in scientific nomenclature to eighty plants and animals, including the Douglas fir and the Douglas squirrel**.\n\n## **90 DASH POINT STATE PARK**\n\n**Federal Way, 13 miles north of Tacoma**\n\n**_A Puget Sound beach and creekside forest feature interpretive and beach activities in this 398-acre park_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **11 miles total; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles on some trails**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, playground, campgrounds, picnic shelters, interpretive trail**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Restrooms, campsites**\n\nThe snow-covered peaks of the Olympics jut into the ice-blue sky to the west. Bald eagles glide or beat their wings against the winter wind, holding in place over the whitecaps of the water. Seagulls screech and harass the eagles for a share of the meal. Bold and dramatic, this is Puget Sound in winter, seen from the wind-whipped beach at Dash Point.\n\nBut whatever the season, the low-tide beach is always inviting with its long strolls (3,300 feet each way) along firm and rippled sand. Views are fine across the East Passage to Maury Island, Vashon Island, and the Olympics. On hot summer weekends, the beach area is crowded with families and children. Driftwood, adorned in black and silver mussel shells and rosettes of barnacles, accents the gently sloping beach. To the north, where the park hillsides pitch steeply to the beach, fir and madrona trees lie across the sand, their roots torn loose from the hill. But at low tide, you can skirt these and walk until your calves ache.\n\nTo escape the crowds or the rising tide, head inland for quiet forest walks. From the southwestern corner of the beach parking lot, a dirt-and-sand trail pursues the creek under high maples, firs, and red alders. These miles of trail are for worry-free wandering\u2014some lead nowhere, some to east campground loops. Sturdy wooden bridges span the stream, and steps with railings ease the steep climb from beach to bluff.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 5700 SW Dash Point Road, Federal Way\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 143 (Federal Way\/S 320th Street). Turn west on S 320th Street. Go about 4.7 miles and turn right on 47th Avenue SW. At the next T-junction, turn left onto Dash Point Road (WA 509). The park entrance is on the right in about 0.5 miles. A Discover Pass is required for parking.\n\n**CONTACT:** Washington State Parks, (253) 661-4955, www.parks.wa.gov\n\n## **91 WEST HYLEBOS WETLANDS PARK**\n\n**Federal Way, 11.5 miles northeast of Tacoma**\n\n**_Walk on boardwalks over 12,000-year-old peat through this 120-acre urban oasis of wetland and wildlife_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1.7-mile loop; boardwalk**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **Not allowed**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, interpretive trail, picnic tables**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Trail, restrooms**\n\nNestled in the heart of Federal Way, this small enclave of native wetland is a schoolroom in the wild. Rich, earthy scents accompany you along the dry boardwalk trail. Interpretive markers call attention to wetland plants and common inhabitants of the peat bog and streambank. The walkways \"float\" on a cushioning of 36 feet of peat that dates back 12,000 to 15,000 years. Moss drapes heavily from the limbs of the big-leaf maples.\n\nThis park has caught the attention of environmental groups, researchers, and nature enthusiasts alike. But the main thrust of interest in the park came from the Marckx family, who donated 25 acres to the State in the late 1980s with the dream of creating a wetlands preserve. In 2004, Hylebos Wetlands was transferred to the City of Federal Way, and the current 120 acres support dozens of species of moss, lichen, and fungi. Coho salmon have returned to the stream, flashing ruby-red scales against the green of the forest.\n\nBirds, although not easy to see because of the dense vegetation and the low light, raise their voices in a chorus of song in the early morning and serenade the sunset. Hawks and other birds of prey frequent the park and its surroundings. Great blue herons feed at Mar Lake as though it were a breakfast buffet.\n\nDon't plan to visit Hylebos immediately after a heavy winter storm; the stream floods several times each winter, prohibiting access to Brook Lake and leaving the boardwalks slippery.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 411 S 348th Street, Federal Way\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 142B (WA 18 W\/Federal Way). Turn west on WA 18\/S 348th Street toward Federal Way. Go 1.3 miles and turn left onto 4th Avenue S, where you will find the parking lot.\n\n**CONTACT:** Federal Way Parks, Recreation, and Cultural Services Department; (253) 835-6960; www.cityoffederalway.com\/\u200bpage\/\u200bparks-recreation-cultural-services. To volunteer, contact Friends of the Hylebos: www.hylebos.org.\n\n## **92 TITLOW PARK**\n\n**5 miles west of downtown Tacoma**\n\n**_Explore 75 acres of parkland with Olympic Mountain views by the Tacoma Narrows_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **2.5 miles; gravel, natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only on forest trails; bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, playground, community center, fitness course, picnic shelters, playing fields, swimming pools, tennis courts, spray park**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Restrooms, paved trail, buildings, pool**\n\nThe beauty of Titlow Park hides behind the busy facade of a swimming pool, playing fields, buildings, and two lagoons: one fresh, one tidal. To leave the high concentration of people, dogs, and ducks, walk past the activities areas, heading north on the gravel trail that parallels the Burlington Northern Santa Fe Railway tracks. Suddenly the crowds dissipate, and you walk in the shade of alders and graceful madronas. A fitness course winds its way over stream and wetlands through the forest.\n\nAt the maintenance road, turn left toward the beach and take the overpass safely over the railroad tracks. Here, in a secluded strip of forest above the sand, you'll find picnic tables and viewpoints over the water. To explore the beach, follow the old boat-launch ramp down. At low tide you have 0.5 miles of sand and crabs, clams and seaweed to explore before reaching the southern end of Titlow.\n\nSeparated from the rest of the park by the railroad tracks, the southwestern corner features views, picnicking, and beachcombing. High on the old ferry dock pilings, wooden birdhouses await nesting martins. Interpretive signs tell about the tidal zones and the creatures living there. This is a favorite point for scuba divers and kayakers, so there's always lots of activity to watch. At high tide, you can walk the 0.25-mile access road between the tracks and the beach for fine views of the water and the Tacoma Narrows Bridge.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 8425 6th Avenue, Tacoma\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 132 (WA 16 W\/Gig Harbor). Go about 4.5 miles west on WA 16. Exit onto Jackson Avenue and turn left (south). Go one block and turn right on 6th Avenue to reach the park.\n\n**CONTACT:** Metro Parks Tacoma, (253) 305-1000, www.metroparkstacoma.org\n\n**Kid Tip: Choose Walks with Variety**\n\n**Avoid long, straight trails when walking with children unless they want to try out their tricycle while you walk. Playgrounds make good bribes for the end of a trail well walked. Streams are fun, but not if they're protected for salmon and can't be played in. You almost can't go wrong with beaches, but you may want the beach to be the destination, not the walk itself. It's hard to get kids to move when there is so much stuff to be picked up and played with**.\n\n## **93 WRIGHT PARK**\n\n**Downtown Tacoma**\n\n**_This urban park of 27 acres offers a sanctuary of nature in downtown Tacoma_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1.5 miles total; gravel**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash; not allowed in conservatory**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, playground, picnic areas, classes, community center, horseshoe pits, lawn bowling, wading pool, conservatory**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Restrooms, community center, conservatory, paths**\n\nMoist, warm air awakens the sense of smell, and brilliant floral colors stimulate eyes weary of Washington's ever-present green. Birds of paradise, exotic orchids, tropical bromeliads, and poinsettias paint a wild palette of color inside the W. W. Seymour Botanical Conservatory (open daily from 10:00 a.m. to 4:30 p.m.; free admission). Outside, exotic trees from Asia and Europe add new and unfamiliar forms to the lawns etched by zigzagging paths.\n\nA patch of elegant greenery in historic Tacoma, this 100-year-old park is unique in its spacious landscaping. Follow the paths up and down gentle hillocks. Pause to watch the antics of the mallards on the pond or feel the emotion created by sculptor Larry Anderson's _The Leaf_ , south of the community center. But people, more than plants, animals, and art, are the focus of this lively park. As you walk, watch the gyrations of intense young basketball players, the graceful moves of the lawn bowlers, and the directed concentration of the horseshoe players. Then carry on with your walk\u2014there are lots of tree species to learn.\n\n**ADDRESS:** S 6th Avenue and S I Street, Tacoma\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 132 (WA 16 W\/Gig Harbor). From WA 16, take the first exit, Sprague Avenue, and go north 1.5 miles to S 6th Avenue. Turn right (east) on S 6th Avenue to S I Street and the park. There is curbside parking around the park.\n\n**CONTACT:** Metro Parks Tacoma, (253) 305-1000, www.metroparkstacoma.org\n\n**This Isn't New York!**\n\n**Try saying \"Hi.\" You may not talk to strangers on the street, but camaraderie develops among walkers. Some neighborhood trails have been responsible for creating whole new social groups**.\n\n## **94 TACOMA NATURE CENTER**\n\n**3 miles west of downtown Tacoma**\n\n**_Snake Lake's 71 acres of wetlands and forest are alive with birds and wildlife_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **2.5 miles; paved, natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to moderate**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **Not allowed**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, playground, picnic area, classes, interpretive center, interpretive trail**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **First Bridge Loop Trail (0.5 miles), restrooms, interpretive center**\n\nThe forest here seems intimate, as though nature were wrapping you in earth and lake smells, vine and shrub textures, and the songs of birds. Ten feet from the trail and indifferent to human presence, the wood ducks continue pecking, grooming, and twittering on the muddy bank of Snake Lake. Each line of their vivid, poster-colored heads stands out in sharp contrast to the brown earth.\n\nWinter is a rewarding time to visit this small, snake-shaped lake in the midst of commercial Tacoma. Where only a corner of water remains unfrozen, the ducks, geese, and grebes congregate in massive displays of color and motion. The snowberry and blackberry thickets stand crisp and naked without their greenery, letting you watch the wrens flit from twig to twig.\n\nWarmer weather, though, invites you to explore all 71 acres. Walk the Bridge Loop Trails, pausing on the bridges or in the wildlife blinds along the trail, to see what creatures come to feed among the reeds. Year-round waterfowl include mallards, Canada geese, herons, and wood ducks. A climb up the Hillside Loop above the lake promises more exercise and the refreshing cool of shade. Early-morning visitors may see prints of the resident red foxes or raccoons.\n\nThe Tacoma Nature Center has displays, hands-on activities for adults and kids, interpretive information, and a gift shop. The preserve is open daily from 8:00 a.m. until dusk; the interpretive center is open Monday through Saturday from 9:00 a.m. to 4:00 p.m. (free admission).\n\n**ADDRESS:** 1919 S Tyler Street, Tacoma\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 132 (WA 16 W\/Gig Harbor\/Bremerton). Go 2.5 miles west on WA 16 and take the 19th Street E exit. Turn right on S 19th Street, then right again on S Tyler Street. Parking is on the left.\n\n**CONTACT:** Metro Parks Tacoma, (253) 591-6439, www.metroparkstacoma.org\n\n## **95 CHAMBERS BAY LOOP**\n\n**University Place, 9 miles southwest of Tacoma**\n\n**_Walk miles of paved trail in bright light or forest glen overlooking the sound on 900 acres_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **3.5 miles; paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to moderate**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **Off-leash area on beach, otherwise on leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Central Meadow Loop Trails and 2 miles of beach**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic areas, playground**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Grandview Trail, restrooms; Soundview Trail slopes exceed 10 percent**\n\nSounds of the city diminish as you step from the hilltop parking lot on Grandview Drive onto the gently sloping Soundview Trail. Two paved trails encircle the Chambers Bay Golf Course and together offer a piece of magic just south of the Tacoma Narrows. Whether you walk from the northern corner past the colorful playground or from the southern corner near the club house, you'll be rewarded with ever-widening views of the sound and, on a clear day, the Olympic Mountains to the west.\n\nThe northern portion of the Soundview Trail winds back and forth through shady glens before emerging onto the open space at the edge of the golf course. From here the trail parallels the coastline and the Burlington Northern Santa Fe Railway line. Up to eighty passenger and freight trains chug past daily, and their plaintive horns may be the only man-made sounds you'll hear on this 2-mile walk. At the southern end, a graceful arching walkway takes you over the tracks onto a 2-mile stretch of Puget Sound beach. Here, dogs can run as they will south of the bridge, and children will enjoy exploring all the drift logs piled like a giant's matchsticks on the beach.\n\nThe huge, almost artistic concrete structures are all that remain of the era when this land was used for a quarry and the sand and gravel were transported along conveyor belts to the shore. The walk up the southern end of the trail may be hot on a sunny day, but the full 200 feet that were lost in elevation have to be regained. To avoid the hills on Soundview Trail, you can park at the southwest lot, walk the coast trail until the incline is too much, then return.\n\nFor another level trail, more suitable to wheeled vehicles, a stroll along the Grandview Trail may be just what you seek. Here, you will have to ignore the sounds of mellow traffic on Grandview Drive, but you can turn your attention to the rolling, intricately contoured hills of the golf course, the movements of trains far below, or tugboats on the sound.\n\n**ADDRESS:** _North end:_ 5000 Grandview Drive W, University Place; _south end:_ 6320 Grandview Drive W, University Place\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 130 (S 56th Street\/Tacoma Mall). Go west on 56th Street for 2.5 miles, where it becomes Cirque Avenue W. Go 2.7 miles to reach Grandview Drive W. For parking on the south end, turn left and go 0.7 miles to the lot on the right. For the north end, turn right, then left into the playground parking lot.\n\n**CONTACT:** Pierce County Parks and Recreation Department, (253) 798-4176, www.piercecountywa.org\/\u200bparks\n\n## **96 CHAMBERS CREEK CANYON TRAIL**\n\n**University Place, 12 miles southwest of Tacoma**\n\n**_Walk along a clear, salmon-spawning creek that flows through lush forest into Chambers Bay on Puget Sound_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1.5 miles one way; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms Memorial Day to Labor Day only**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **None**\n\nHike high on a wildland hillside of moss-covered big-leaf maples and Douglas firs you can hardly fit your arms around. Look out into the canopy of trees and down to the shimmering glimpse of Chambers Creek. Listen to the silence of the forest, broken by the song of a thrush or the rustling of a squirrel in the brush.\n\nAn unpretentious beginning leads to this well-traveled trail in a mature forest, just minutes from the I-5 corridor south of Tacoma. In summer, take a moment to walk to the bridge over Chambers Bay before starting up the trail; the forest is so dense with summer greenery that this may be your only chance to see the estuary, which resounds with the calls of the killdeer and the shrills of the gulls. In winter, the big-leaf maples drop their screening leaves and allow views from the trail to the stream and estuary below.\n\nThis trail is rough and steep. It's not advisable in wet weather, but when it's dry you can follow it to the top, where houses announce the end of parkland. Along this steep climb up the shoulder of the creek ravine, listen for the forest birds and the chattering squirrels. Pause at the spacious glen where the hillside is carved into an amphitheater of fern and salal.\n\nSeveral side trails drop down toward the stream. The first leads to a clearing by the bay, the second to a high viewpoint over clear, rushing Chambers Creek. Old stumps make homes for owls and provide food for flickers and sapsuckers. Watch for trail improvements as Pierce County puts new trail plans into action.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 10000 Chambers Creek Road W, University Place\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 130 (S 56th Street). Go west on S 56th Street for 2.5 miles, where it becomes Cirque Drive W. Go 1.9 miles and turn left onto 67th Avenue W. In 0.8 miles 67th Avenue turns right to become Chambers Creek Road W. Go 2.5 miles and cross the Chambers Creek Bridge. Look immediately on the left for a small parking area and trail sign.\n\n**CONTACT:** Pierce County Parks and Recreation Department, (253) 798-4176, www.piercecountywa.org\/\u200bparks\n\n**Finding Your Way**\n\n**Not all trails remain as they were originally built. Trees fall down. Trails get flooded out. Signs fall down or are faded. New neighborhoods crop up like dandelions, so driving directions can also change. Keep a sense of direction, and always walk with someone else**.\n\n## **97 FORT STEILACOOM PARK**\n\n**Steilacoom, 11 miles southwest of Tacoma**\n\n**_Meadows by Waughop Lake offer bird-watching, historical sites, and mountain views from this 340-acre park_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **10 miles; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to moderate**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles, horses**  \n**DOGS** | **Off-leash area, otherwise on leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic areas, playground, playing fields**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Waughop Lake trail, picnic area, playground**\n\nFrom fort to farm to county park, these grounds represent a chronicle of Washington history. Parade grounds from the 1850s have given way to meadow grasses, and old buildings have succumbed to the weight of time. There was never a stockade at Fort Steilacoom, which protected the settlers at the bustling Steilacoom port from 1849 to 1868. When soldiers left, it was the farm that supplied the state mental hospital (which still lies to the north). Today, as you walk these spacious meadows, you can see the old hospital cemetery grounds, dating from 1876 to 1953, and the restored 1930s farm buildings and barns.\n\nFrom the southwestern corner of the parking area near the barns, head west toward Waughop Lake. A wheelchair-accessible 1-mile trail circumnavigates the lake under the shade of elms and redwoods. Willows gracefully dip their branches to the water, and mallards paddle about.\n\nClimb the knoll on well-worn footpaths, past several old orchards and lines of poplars. At the top, you'll find the imposing ruins of the 1940s patients' ward, now used as a site to train emergency personnel in earthquake or bombing preparedness. Views here expand west to the Olympics and to Fox, McNeil, and Anderson Islands in the Tacoma Narrows. To the east Mount Rainier looms, and below you see Waughop Lake and the Pierce College campus.\n\nOther trails weave like a spiderweb through the meadows up to the southern forest boundary. Though you have 340 acres to explore, you're not likely to get lost: there's plenty of long-distance visibility across the meadows and from the hillocks.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 8714 87th Avenue SW, Lakewood\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 127 (WA 512\/S Tacoma Way). Stay left (if northbound) or right (if southbound) for WA 512 and S Tacoma Way\/Lakewood. Go 0.9 miles on S Tacoma Way and turn left onto Steilacoom Boulevard SW. Go 3.3 miles and turn left onto 87th Avenue SW, then right into the park.\n\n**CONTACT:** Lakewood Parks and Recreation Department, (253) 589-2489, www.cityoflakewood.us\/\u200bparks-and-recreation\/\u200bparks\n\n## **98 WAPATO PARK**\n\n**6.5 miles south of downtown Tacoma**\n\n**_Stroll around Wapato Lake with its bird sanctuaries, wetlands, and mature forest in this 80-acre park_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1.4 miles; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **Off-leash area, otherwise on leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic area, playground, fishing pier, garden, ball fields; summer only: concessions, paddleboats**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved trail along lake, restrooms, picnic area**\n\nFormal gardens and a white-trellised pergola welcome you to 27-acre Wapato Lake, which takes its name from the previously abundant aquatic root the Native Americans harvested from the lake. Not much of this busy park recalls such quieter times, but away from the picnic areas and playing fields, you can find sanctuaries of marshland and mature forest.\n\nNorth of the garden entrance, an off-leash area attracts dozens of dog lovers and their canine friends. Beyond that, you'll find a stone bridge from 1933 funded by the Works Progress Administration. In the forest, follow footpaths to the 0.67-mile fitness course or continue on the road, cutting left toward the marshland. A high footbridge lifts you over the cattails where red-winged blackbirds nest. Marsh wrens call _tsuck, tsuck_ and flit from bush to bush. Kids can fish year-round, and you can pause in your meander to watch the bottoms-up antics of the coots and mallards feeding among the water lilies. On the western side of the lake, join the trail again to complete a loop around the lake.\n\nHundred-year-old fir and hemlock offer summer shade near the swimming area and summer concessions. Footpaths connect the open lawns, playing fields, southern picnic area, and parking lot. Look for the old wrought-iron lightpost slowly being absorbed by the dense bark of a Douglas fir.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 1401 S 68th Street, Tacoma\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 129 (S 72nd Street). Go east on S 72nd Street for 2 blocks and turn left (north) on S Sheridan Street. The entrance is on the left at S Sheridan Street and S 68th Street.\n\n**CONTACT:** Metro Parks Tacoma, (253) 305-1000, www.metroparkstacoma.org\n\n## **99 SWAN CREEK PARK**\n\n**4 miles east of downtown Tacoma**\n\n**_Soft forest trails in a 290-acre park hug the side of a lush ravine above a clear stream, which teems with salmon in the fall_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **2 miles one way; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only except for bicycles on dedicated single-track trails**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Benches, restrooms, picnic area, mountain-bike park**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Picnic area near western entrance at E 42nd Street and E Roosevelt Avenue**\n\nTraverse a fern-covered and forested hillside above a salmon-spawning creek that has carved a pebbled gully for itself. Listen to the call of birds over the soft murmuring of the water. Tacoma's Swan Creek Park is most often visited by people wanting to cool off on a hot summer's day, let the kids play in the detention pond fed by Swan Creek, or watch the coho and Chinook salmon make their arduous way up the stream in the fall. But past the pond and the footbridge, a trail leads deep into a fine old forest of towering Douglas firs and moss-bedecked big-leaf maples leaning elegantly over the stream.\n\nSaved from becoming a landfill back in the 1960s, Swan Creek is now a showcase of mature Northwest forest and an active salmon stream. Even in summer, when there are no salmon in the stream, the water runs clear and bright over a pebbled streambed, and the old logs and rocks guarantee good hiding places for the newly hatched fry in winter. The trail begins near the pond and climbs slowly, staying near the level of the stream. Numerous \"social trails\" lead to the water's edge, where you can rest on a downed log or picnic on a shady bank.\n\nThe wet season brings standing water to parts of the trail, so while the boardwalks are welcome, they can be slippery. This is a good place to practice \"walk or look,\" because if you try to take in the beauty of the forest while walking, it is easy to fall on the narrow trail crisscrossed with tree roots.\n\nIn 2015 the county carved 50 acres out of the park's 290 for the city's first mountain-bike park. More than 3 miles of dedicated trails crisscross the hilly western corner of the park, where bikers jump and slide along the single-track one-way trails. These trails are well marked for bicycles, and as walkers it's best to leave them to it. There's still plenty of fine walking to be had along the traverse trails above the stream.\n\n**ADDRESS:** Pioneer Way E and Waller Road E, Tacoma\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5 southbound, take exit 135 (Bay Street\/River Road\/WA 167 N). Take the first left onto Bay Street, crossing under I-5. Continue straight through the light where Bay Street becomes River Road. Stay right past the cemetery and merge onto Pioneer Way E. The parking lot is just past the Clay Art Center on the right.\n\nFrom I-5 northbound, take exit 135 (River Road\/WA 167 N\/Puyallup). Stay on River Road and continue as above.\n\n**CONTACT:** Metro Parks Tacoma, (253) 305-1000, www.metroparkstacoma.org\n\nCredit 77\n\n**Love That Dog!**\n\n**Other walkers would probably love your dog if they knew him or her. But dogs belong on a leash (where posted) to protect wildlife, minimize their impact on the habitat, and avoid disturbing other walkers and pets. Many parks now patrol and ticket leash offenders**.\n\n## **100 CLARKS CREEK PARK**\n\n**Puyallup, 10 miles southeast of Tacoma**\n\n**_Watch spawning salmon or hike a mixed forest hillside in this 55-acre park_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **4.5 miles; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **Off-leash area, otherwise on leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **DeCoursey Park**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, playground, picnic areas, ball fields, fitness course**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved trails from parking lots, restrooms**\n\nWhen the fall colors brighten the hillside above Clarks Creek in Puyallup, the clear-running creek itself comes to life with hundreds of spawning salmon. Known for its runs of Chinook, chum, and coho salmon, the creek is part of the Puyallup River Watershed, and fish, both from a hatchery and wild, make their way up the creek to the gravel beds to spawn. Volunteers have worked with city and county ecologists to improve the riparian ecology of the creek and its banks. The local trout hatchery, owned by the Puyallup Tribe, is highly acclaimed for its innovative techniques of recreating a natural setting for the young fry within the hatchery and is open to the public.\n\nOnce the fall and winter fish runs are over, the creek returns to its placid burble down from the forested hillsides, through the natural wetlands, and northward toward the Puyallup River. Clarks Creek Park offers a variety of activity, from power walks along paved walkways near the tennis courts and ball fields in the north, to playing catch with your canine friend in the 0.67-acre off-leash area, to a hearty stroll along forest paths.\n\nA wide crushed-gravel path leads upward from the off-leash area, but as you climb higher the path gets narrower and more meandering. High on the hillside to the west, the myriad trails are favorites of the local mountain bikers, so beware of fast-moving cyclists on weekends or during school holidays. If the cyclists are out, a better bet for quietude is to stick to the eastern paths, in the lower ravines, although these paths cross a sensitive wetland and are almost impassable in winter or after heavy rains. A gentle stroll can be extended by crossing 7th Avenue and enjoying the pondside trails through tiny DeCoursey Park to the north.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 1900 7th Avenue SW, Puyallup\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 135 (WA 167 N\/Puyallup). Go 0.5 miles on WA 167 toward Puyallup, and make a slight right onto Pioneer Way S. Continue on Pioneer Way for 5.2 miles. Turn right onto S Fruitland, then left onto 7th Avenue SW to reach the parking lot, which will be on your right.\n\n**CONTACT:** Puyallup Parks and Recreation Department, (253)-841-5457, www.cityofpuyallup.org\/\u200b248\/\u200bparks-recreation\n\n## **101 FOOTHILLS TRAIL**\n\n**Puyallup, 8.5 miles southeast of Tacoma, to McMillin, 14 miles southeast of Tacoma, to Buckley, 22.5 miles southeast of Tacoma**\n\n**_Meander through Carbon River farmland and small historic towns with views of Mount Rainier_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **26 miles; paved from Puyallup to South Prairie; natural and paved from South Prairie to Buckley**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles; horses on soft shoulder**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Extension south to Carbonado, undeveloped**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic areas at trailheads**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved trail**\n\nImagine riding with the engineer in the locomotive of a Burlington Northern train along the floodplain of the glacial-silted Carbon River. Ahead looms Mount Rainier, mighty volcano of ice and snow. The river beside you is white and rushing, cutting its path through a millennium of rocky till. Tannin-brown streams swirl and join the opaque river.\n\nNow, although the railroad runs no more, the route is open to those seeking a slower mode of transport. Thanks to the Foothills Rails-to-Trails Coalition and Pierce County, 26 miles of long-abandoned railbed are available for recreation from McMillin to Buckley, with a spur from lower Cascade Junction to Wilkeson and Carbonado. The coalition and the county are working to fulfill their vision of a 12-foot-wide nonmotorized asphalt trail and linear park system throughout Pierce County, eventually leading all the way from King County's Interurban Trail to Mount Rainier.\n\nRiverside scenery and mountain views are just two of the pleasures of walking the Foothills Trail. Picnic areas dot the trail, as well as cow pastures, scenic footbridges over the river, and even a bison and pygmy goat farm. From McMillin, the paved trail heads south through Orting, then swings east to cross the Carbon River. Eagles grace tall trees, watching for small rodent meals in the meadows below. This stretch, beginning in Orting, along the Carbon River, is one of the best walking sections, with its mix of farmland, meadows, and river scenery. Walk out and back as far as your energy carries you.\n\nTo enjoy the full length of the trail, bicycles may be in order, but numerous access points (the trail runs parallel to WA 162 in many places) allow you to explore on foot a few miles at a time. Near the towns there are many street crossings; be sure to keep children and pets closely supervised.\n\n**ADDRESS:** _Trailheads:_ 13810 80th Street E, Puyallup; 14000 WA 162, McMillin; 646 N River Avenue, Buckley\n\n**GETTING THERE:** _Puyallup Trailhead:_ From I-5, take exit 135 (WA 167 S\/Puyallup). Go 6.2 miles on WA 167 and turn right onto N Meridian. Go 0.5 miles and turn left onto E Pioneer. Go 2.1 miles and turn left onto 134th Avenue E. Turn right onto 80th Street E, and go 0.2 miles to the trailhead.\n\n_McMillin Trailhead:_ From I-5 north- or southbound, take exit 135 (WA 167 S\/Puyallup). Go 1.2 miles on WA 167 and exit at WA 410 (Sumner\/Yakima). Go 1.3 miles and take the WA 162 exit toward Orting. Go 4.5 miles to the trailhead.\n\n_Buckley Trailhead:_ From I-5 north- or southbound, take exit 135 (WA 167 S\/Puyallup). Go 1.2 miles on WA 167 and exit at WA 410 (Sumner\/Yakima). Stay on 410 east in Buckley; the trailhead is located at the armory.\n\n**CONTACT:** Pierce County Parks and Recreation Department, (253) 798-4176, www.piercecountywa.org\/\u200bparks\n\n## **102 SPANAWAY PARK AND BRESEMANN FOREST**\n\n**Spanaway, 15 miles south of Tacoma**\n\n**_Wooded trails and sunny paths crisscross 300 acres of forest and wetland in these sister parks_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **About 8 miles; gravel, natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles on designated trails**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic shelters, playground, ball fields, swimming beach, interpretive signs, boat rentals, Sprinker Recreation Center, climbing wall**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Restrooms, paved trails, picnic shelters, ball fields at Spanaway Park; none in Bresemann Forest**\n\nFollow a wide graveled trail along the edge of Spanaway Lake, or explore shaded trails through a wetland or forest\u2014all just minutes from downtown Tacoma.\n\nLike a mink changing color for the winter, this park, too, changes with the seasons. In summer the manicured lawns resound with families and children playing, motorboats, and Jet Skis on the lake. The snack bar attracts crowds, and the aromas of ketchup and grilling supper fill the air. You can walk here then, but sometimes it's an effort: it's easy to rely on the car to move from one end of the long park to the other.\n\nOff-season, though, Spanaway Park regains a more natural feel. Fishermen cast their lines in hope of bass or trout. Migrant waterfowl glide on the still waters, and you can stroll the waterfront trail, then return by the upper playing fields, beneath majestic Douglas firs.\n\nAt the northern end, where the lake empties to a stream, two footbridges lead into a more sylvan setting of alders and willows, salal and ferns. The dirt trail is narrow, with exposed roots and rocks, climbing a gentle hill and then dropping to a wetland. Follow a stone-lined footpath along the edge of the wetland, onto the nearly 3 miles of new trails near Little Spanaway Lake, and then return over the footbridges.\n\nJust north, across Military Road, Bresemann Forest invites walkers to explore the many miles of interpretive trail and informal forest paths. These natural surface, sometimes rough trails begin near the Spire Rock, a community climbing wall, and loop into the forest and along Morey Creek.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 14905 Bresemann Boulevard S, Tacoma\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 127 (WA 512 E\/Puyallup). Go east for 2 miles on WA 512 and turn right (south) on WA 7 (Pacific Avenue S). Go 3 miles and turn right on Old Military Road S (152nd Street E). Go 0.5 miles to the park's main gate on the left. Sprinker Recreation Center and forest trails are on the right (north) side; the lake is on the left. Parking fee of $3 may apply.\n\n**CONTACT:** Pierce County Parks and Recreation Department, (253) 798-4176, www.piercecountywa.org\/\u200bparks\n\n## **103 NATHAN CHAPMAN MEMORIAL TRAIL**\n\n**South Hill, 12 miles southeast of Tacoma**\n\n**_A smooth, paved trail leads you past wetlands and through mature second-growth forest_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1.6 miles one way; paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **1-mile loop in South Hill Community Park; Heritage Recreation Center**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **None on trail; restrooms, picnic tables, and playgrounds at South Hill Community Park and Heritage Recreation Center trailheads**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Restrooms, trail**\n\nJoin dozens of dog walkers, stroller pushers, and folks just out for a walk along this wide paved corridor through large fir and hemlock trees and past small wetland ponds. So well hidden is this 1.6-mile trail that you can forget the stress of city life just minutes away. On sunny days, bright patches of light filter down from the canopy, cheering a winter day, and in summer the trees offer enough shade to cool a warm-day outing.\n\nArmy Sergeant First Class Nathan Chapman, for whom the trail was named, was not only a resident of South Hill but was also the first American to die from enemy fire in Afghanistan. A memorial with an information plaque is erected at the South Hill Community Park end of the trail.\n\nThe trail was built as a connector from the South Hill Community Park, where you'll find a 1-mile loop trail through more open meadows with picnic tables to the ball fields and amenities of the Heritage Recreation Center to the north. These trails lie near the South Hill Heritage Corridor, and on plaques at the center you can read some of the history of the 1853 Longmire-Byles wagon train that crossed over the Naches Pass Trail through South Hill.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 14201 86th Avenue E, South Hill\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 127 (Mount Rainier\/Puyallup) and follow signs for WA 512 E. Exit WA 512 at Canyon Road E and go south. Turn left immediately onto 112th Street E. Go 2 miles and turn right onto 86th Avenue E. South Hill Community Park is on the left in 0.5 miles. The Nathan Chapman Memorial Trail leaves from the northern end of the parking lot.\n\n**CONTACT:** Pierce County Parks and Recreation Department, (253) 798-4176, www.piercecountywa.org\/\u200bparks\n\n# **OLYMPIA**\n\n**104** Frye Cove Park\n\n**105** Burfoot Park\n\n**106** Woodard Bay Natural Resources Conservation Area\n\n**107** Chehalis Western Trail\n\n**108** Tolmie State Park\n\n**109** Nisqually National Wildlife Refuge\n\n**110** Sequalitchew Creek\n\n**111** Priest Point Park\n\n**112** McLane Creek Nature Trail\n\n**113** Watershed Park (Olympia)\n\n**114** Olympia Woodland Trail\n\n**115** Tumwater Historical Park and Capitol Lake Interpretive Trail\n\n**116** Tumwater Falls Park\n\n**117** Pioneer Park (Tumwater)\n\n**118** Mima Mounds Natural Area Preserve\n\n**119** Millersylvania State Park\n\n**120** Yelm to Tenino Trail\n\n## **104 FRYE COVE PARK**\n\n**12 miles northwest of downtown Olympia**\n\n**_Forested trails through 86 acres lead to southern Puget Sound views at an Eld Inlet beach_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **3 miles total; gravel, natural surfaces**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, playground, picnic area, shelters, beach**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Gravel trail from parking lot to picnic area, restrooms**\n\nTucked away on one of many finger inlets of southern Puget Sound, this forest and beach park entices with the twin luxuries of silence and seclusion.\n\nWhen you enter the forest in summer, the big-leaf maples and alders shield you from the brilliance of the sun on the sound. Licorice ferns adorn the moss on the maples like miniature Dr. Seuss characters on parade around the tree trunks. Catkins from the red alders dangle above the trail and speckle the path.\n\nLast logged a hundred years ago, the forest has a mature presence, and the air carries the heady scent of cedar and salt. Hemlocks, some more than 200 feet tall, drape their graceful branches above the trail. Benches and observation decks are placed for glimpses of the Sound and beach below, and a raised walkway carries you over a dense ravine of sword ferns.\n\nAfter you complete a forest loop on Cove Trail and return to the parking lot, you can descend a gentle-to-steep trail to arrive at the southern end of the beach. Air holes of a million clams dapple the sand-and-mud beach at low tide, and palm-sized clams and oysters provide feasts for crows and gulls. If the kids get tired of clams and sand, they can find lots of entertainment on the new playground near the shelters.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 4000 61st Avenue NW, Olympia\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 104 (US 101 N\/Aberdeen). Stay on US 101 toward Shelton, and take the Steamboat Island Road exit. Go north on Steamboat Island Road NW for about 5.8 miles, and turn right on Young Road NW. Go about 2 miles, and turn left on 61st Avenue NW into the park.\n\n**CONTACT:** Thurston County Parks and Recreation Department, (360) 786-5595, www.co.thurston.wa.us\/\u200bparks\n\n## **105 BURFOOT PARK**\n\n**6 miles north of downtown Olympia**\n\n**_Forest trails through 60 acres descend to 1,000 feet of Budd Inlet beach with State Capitol views_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **3.8 miles; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Moderate to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic shelters, playground, interpretive trail**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Horizon Trail (a 0.25-mile braille trail), restrooms, shelters, picnic area**\n\nMost of the wonder of Burfoot Park is hidden from the casual first-time visitor. The central lawn and picnic area is so large and appealing that you might believe it's all there is to the park. But drive or walk the parking loop, and you'll discover the three trail entrances into the cool enchantment of the forest, which descends to the beach on Budd Inlet.\n\nFor an easy stroll, start on the Horizon Trail nature loop, which documents the changes in the forest since it was logged in the 1890s. Moisture encourages moss and old man's beard to grow prolifically, and they cover the trees with a thick green shawl.\n\nTo the north, from the Rhododendron Trail, the right-fork Beach Trail descends the ridge of a ravine carpeted with sword fern. Here, the wrens call and hop on downed logs, their short perky tails bobbing. A clear _rat-a-tat-tat_ may sound from above. High on a snag, pileated woodpeckers with iridescent red crests may be circling the tree, probing the bark for grubs. Farther along the fern-bedecked ravine, more snags bear the characteristic rectangular holes made by these birds, the largest western woodpeckers.\n\nThough there are several trails, there is no need for signs; all trails lead to the beach. At low tide, crows stride the pebbled shore, and great blue herons may be feeding on small fish in the shallows. Massive drift logs make natural playgrounds for kids or a romantic resting place to sit and talk. To the south, the dome of the State Capitol rises between forested hills.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 6927 Boston Harbor Road NE, Olympia\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 105 if northbound, or exit 105B if southbound (City Center\/Port of Olympia). Follow Port of Olympia signs and merge onto Plum Street. Go north on Plum Street (which becomes E Bay Drive, and then Boston Harbor Road NE). After 6 miles look for the park on the left.\n\n**CONTACT:** Thurston County Parks and Recreation Department, (360) 786-5595, www.co.thurston.wa.us\/\u200bparks\n\n## **106 WOODARD BAY NATURAL RESOURCES CONSERVATION AREA**\n\n**5 miles northeast of downtown Olympia**\n\n**_Gentle trails wind through 870 acres of protected forest and shoreline where seals, bats, and birds flourish on Henderson Inlet_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **3 miles; boardwalk, natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **Not allowed**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Chehalis Western Trail (Walk #107) from the Overlook Trail parking lot**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic areas, interpretive signs, nature classes, canoe launch (seasonal)**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Parking lot to picnic area on Henderson Inlet via Whitman Road**\n\nBeginning at the paved access road (gated for all vehicles except DNR and ADA), stroll 0.5 miles through moss-draped second-growth forest to Henderson Inlet. You may hear the sharp hammering of woodpeckers or the hoarse, barking sound of the green-backed heron. If the breeze is right, you'll smell the salt water before you see it. The state of the tide determines whether you see shimmering, wet mud or hear the lapping of wavelets on the shore. The clearing at the tip of land called Weyer Point was once a bustling log dump where timber was transferred from railroad cars to the water, to be floated to mills in Everett. Interpretive signs bring the history to life.\n\nThe logging sounds are gone now, giving way to the persistent chatter of belted kingfishers as they hover, searching for lunch below. Soon you may hear the yaps and groans of harbor seals, sometimes three hundred to four hundred of them. In this maternity colony, females and their pups rest on the log booms or sun themselves on the shores. They are easily stressed, so enjoy them from afar. With binoculars, you can watch the cormorants, Canada geese, and gulls standing like nursemaids on old pilings above sleeping seals. Scientists recently discovered a colony of small brown Myotis bats that hibernate under the offshore wharves.\n\nFor variety, take the loop trail through the forest back to the entrance. This natural path ranges up and down gentle hillocks and through forest wetlands over wooden boardwalks. Overhead stand massive maples with spreading branches that could hold swings for giants. Sturdy cedars and hemlocks embrace their nurse logs or form their own colonies of two or three trunks growing together. When the trail parallels the shore of Chapman Bay high on a ridge, you can look down on the flocks of shorebirds or solitary great blue herons feeding.\n\nIf you crave more exercise or forest immersion, Woodard Bay's Overlook Trail leaves from the Chehalis Western Trail parking lot (see Walk #107) just a minute south on Woodard Bay Road. This is a gravel and natural surface trail to the mouth of Henderson Inlet.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 6998 Woodard Bay Road NE, Olympia\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5 southbound, take exit 108 (Martin Way\/Sleater-Kinney Road NE). Go north on Sleater-Kinney Road NE for about 5 miles, until it takes a sharp turn to the left, becoming 56th Avenue NE. Go immediately right on Schinke Road NE, which becomes Woodard Bay Road NE. The Overlook Trail parking lot with restrooms is here.\n\nTo reach the primary trailhead, cross upper Woodard Bay on a bridge. Park immediately on the right by the gated entrance to Whitman Road. Bike racks are inside the gate, past the (summer only) kayak launching ramp. There may be seasonal trail closures to protect wildlife.\n\nA Discover Pass is required for parking.\n\n**CONTACT:** Washington State Department of Natural Resources, (360) 577-2025, www.dnr.wa.gov\n\n## **107 CHEHALIS WESTERN TRAIL**\n\n**5 miles northeast of downtown Olympia to 14 miles southeast of Olympia via Lacey**\n\n**_This rail-to-trail pathway cuts through farmland, wetlands, ponds, and forests from Woodard Bay to the Deschutes River_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **21.5 miles; paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles; horses north of S Bay Road and south of Fir Tree Road**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Olympia Woodland Trail (Walk #114), Woodard Bay Natural Resources Conservation Area (Walk #106), Yelm to Tenino Trail (Walk #120)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, benches, picnic areas, viewing platforms**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Trail, restrooms**\n\nImmerse yourself in rural Western Washington just minutes from shopping-center madness on Martin Way. Walk a paved trail where the woods and wetlands replace the gunning of engines with the sweet chirping of crickets. Horses come to the fence to greet you, and raptors may be soaring over the meadows in search of mice. Small ponds and wetlands add more tranquil greenery. Near Shincke Road, a large marsh-rimmed pond hosts the usual colorful assortment: kingfishers, red-winged blackbirds, marsh wrens, and great blue herons. Recent construction on the trail now allows users to safely bridge the gap from the northern section (north of I-5 and Martin Way) to the southern section of this 21.5-mile thoroughfare without interruption.\n\nCredit 85\n\nFarmlands, scrub forest, and meadows rim the trail as it journeys southward. New viewing platforms overlook ponds and wetlands. Several trailheads exist south of I-5; the northern one at Chambers Lake is the most popular, with amenities on the edge of the lake. Other trailheads are located at 67th Avenue, Fir Tree Road, and 89th Avenue. The final stretch south of 103rd Avenue follows the Deschutes River upstream before intersecting the Yelm to Tenino Trail.\n\n**ADDRESS:** _Northern trailhead:_ 7204 Woodard Bay Road NE, Olympia; _Chambers Lake trailhead:_ 3795 14th Avenue SE, Olympia; _67th Avenue trailhead:_ 4430 67th Avenue\n\n**GETTING THERE:** _Northern trailhead:_ From I-5 southbound, take exit 109 (Martin Way\/ Sleater-Kinney Road N). Go north on Sleater-Kinney Road about 3.7 miles. Turn left onto 56th Avenue NE and go 0.5 miles. Turn right on Shincke Road, then turn left on Woodard Bay Road and drive until you reach the junction with Lemon Road. Park on the right.\n\n_Chambers Lake Trailhead:_ From I-5 northbound, take exit 108 (Sleater-Kinney Road S). Turn right on Sleater-Kinney. Cross Pacific Avenue and turn right onto 14th Avenue. The entrance is after the trestle on the left. From I-5 southbound, take exit 109 (Martin Way\/College Street SE), head south on College Street SE, and proceed as above.\n\n_67th Avenue Trailhead:_ From I-5 northbound, take exit 108 (Sleater-Kinney Road S). Turn right at Sleater-Kinney Road. Turn left at 14th Avenue SE, then right onto College Street SE. Cross the Yelm Highway and stay on College Street, which becomes Rainier Road SE. Turn right onto 67th Avenue and follow it to the end. From I-5 southbound, take exit 109 (College Street). Turn left on College Street SE and proceed as above.\n\n**CONTACT:** Thurston County Parks and Recreation Department, (360) 754-4371, www.co.thurston.wa.us\/\u200bparks\n\n## **108 TOLMIE STATE PARK**\n\n**11 miles northeast of downtown Olympia**\n\n**_Explore 105 acres of forests, salt marshes, and beaches along the Nisqually Reach_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **4.3 miles; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level (beach) to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only in forest; bicycles on paved trails**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, amphitheater, picnic shelters, underwater park; park closed Mondays and Tuesdays from October 1 to March 31**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Restrooms, edge of marsh, picnic area, some trail sections**\n\nJellyfish, sculpins, and rock crabs share the saltwater marsh with eelgrass and pickleweed. On the tidal flats, young geo-ducks have been planted in plastic tubes to protect them from crabs and seagulls until they are a year old. Divers head offshore to explore the sunken barges that have created an underwater reef. You can explore the beach or head inland for miles of forest walking.\n\nThe upper parking lot offers the best views across Puget Sound to the Olympic Mountains. From there, a steep trail with railroad-tie steps leads to the beach and the lower picnic areas. As at other recreational beaches on the Sound, the best time for quiet and solitude is any day but a hot, sunny one. If the tide is in, you can stop on the footbridge over the marsh for a view of the inhabitants. Offshore the usual waterfowl gather\u2014more during fall and winter migration than in summer.\n\nFrom the beach, a long loop trail takes you west into the forest of lichen-covered trees. A boardwalk keeps your feet dry while letting you examine the plant life along the way. Benches make good snack stops or resting points. A shortcut about halfway through the trail brings you back to the parking lot.\n\nThe park honors Dr. William Fraser Tolmie, a pioneer physician with the Hudson's Bay Company who served for 18 years at Fort Nisqually, just east of the present-day park. Married to a daughter of a Hudson's Bay Company chief factor, John Work, Tolmie was instrumental in returning peace to the region after the Indian Wars of 1855\u2013'56. The park is closed on Mondays and Tuesdays, and from October 1 to March 31.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 7730 61st Avenue NE, Olympia\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 111 (WA 510\/Yelm\/Marvin Road) and head west on Marvin Road NE. Go about 3.5 miles and turn right on 56th Avenue NE. Go 0.4 miles, turn left on Hill Street NE, then left again on 61st Avenue NE, where you will find the park. A Discover Pass is required for parking.\n\n**CONTACT:** Washington State Parks, (360) 456-6464, www.parks.wa.gov\n\n## **109 NISQUALLY NATIONAL WILDLIFE REFUGE**\n\n**9.5 miles northeast of downtown Olympia**\n\n**_Walk through green forest by ponds and a river, or stroll the miles of level boardwalk crossing this 3,000-acre protected estuary_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1-mile loop, plus 3-mile round-trip boardwalk**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only (no jogging)**  \n**DOGS** | **Not allowed**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, interpretive center (open Wednesday to Sunday), nature walks, observation decks**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Twin Barns Loop, Nisqually Estuary Boardwalk Trail, restrooms, interpretive center**\n\nCompleting its journey from the heights of Mount Rainier, the Nisqually River releases its pent-up energy into the broad expanse of the estuary. The air is rich with the scent of salt from Puget Sound and freshwater from the river. The open meadows and wetlands are vast, inviting exploration.\n\nIn winter, snow geese and white-fronted geese huddle into the receding tide line. Year-round, dozens of great blue herons stand like sentries of the wetland, some intent on the fish that dart between their stilt-like legs, others staring as though trying to comprehend the human forms with binocular eyes. Green-belted kingfishers hover above their prey, while over the grasslands immature bald eagles practice soaring and diving. Most visitors to the refuge come for the birds: there are more than a hundred species of resident waterfowl, raptors, and songbirds, as well as more than twenty thousand migratory birds that gather here during fall and winter.\n\nBut you needn't be a keen birder to appreciate a walk around the 1-mile Twin Barns Loop on either natural surface or boardwalk. This shorter stroll takes you through moss-draped forest and to viewing platforms and observation decks where interpretive signs explain the lives of muskrats and beavers.\n\nFor those wanting a longer sojourn, the Nisqually Estuary Boardwalk Trail continues as a spur from the barns and meanders to the north, with the salt-water tidal estuary to the northeast and the freshwater wetlands of McAllister Creek to the south. In recent years the old Brown Farm Dike was removed to allow the waters of Puget Sound to mingle with the river water and improve habitat. Along the new obstacle-free boardwalk you'll find benches, viewing platforms, and a viewing blind. On clear days Mount Rainier highlights the skyline to the east, and from the Twin Barns Loop you can get views of the Olympics to the west.\n\nThe Nisqually Reach Nature Center offers a free summer-evening lecture series, and in the warm season there are free daytime guided walks focusing on the birds, plants, or history of the area.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 100 Brown Farm Road, Olympia\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 114 (Nisqually). Turn west at the end of the ramp and go under the freeway. Turn right (following signs) into the refuge. Holders of a Senior Pass or an Interagency Annual Pass are exempt from the $3 per vehicle admission fee.\n\n**CONTACT:** Nisqually National Wildlife Refuge, (360) 753-9467, www.fws.gov\/\u200bnisqually\n\n## **110 SEQUALITCHEW CREEK**\n\n**DuPont, 15 miles northeast of downtown Olympia**\n\n**_Huge moss-bedecked maples tower above a 38-acre watershed canyon where the clear stream makes its last journey to the waters of Puget Sound_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1.5 miles one way; gravel, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to moderate**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, interpretive guide, map**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **None**\n\nIn a mighty forest of green canopy, green trunks, and green undergrowth, you can stroll gently downhill next to a murmuring creek on its last mile and a half to Puget Sound. This satisfyingly rich forest is a remnant of what surrounded a trading post of the Hudson's Bay Company in the early 1830s. Nisqually Indians fished the creek for coho salmon and traded blankets, potatoes, and seeds. Now, the nearby town of DuPont is bustling with shops and schools, but they have preserved this gem of a walk.\n\nStop in at city hall for a trail map, then follow signage at the far end of the parking lot to cross the creek and turn north (left), downhill. Although much of the trail is a gentle gradient, there are steeper parts where the pavement has been replaced by deep gravel to combat slippage problems. Parents with strollers may have trouble here. This is a gloriously quiet walk, with just the sound of the creek in the deep cleft of forest. Near the wetlands is an old railroad tunnel, in which kids of all ages will love hooting and yodeling to create a symphony of echoes. Emerging from the tunnel, you'll find an expansive stretch of Puget Sound beach complete with pebbles, driftwood, and bits of the old narrow gauge railway. If you want a short but heart-pumping workout, you can follow the switchbacks up a path on the south side that leaves the main trail just inland of the tunnel and wetlands.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 1700 Civic Drive, DuPont\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 119 (Steilacoom Road\/DuPont). Turn west onto Steilacoom Road. Continue onto Barksdale Avenue. Go 0.3 miles to reach city hall on the right. To find the trailhead, park behind city hall, at the far end.\n\n**CONTACT:** DuPont Parks and Recreation Department, (253) 912-5245, www.ci.dupont.wa.us\n\n## **111 PRIEST POINT PARK**\n\n**2.5 miles north of downtown Olympia**\n\n**_Meandering woodland trails through 341 acres lead out to the bluffs and shoreline of southern Puget Sound_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **6 miles round-trip; natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to moderate**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic shelters, playground, wading pool**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Restrooms, picnic areas**\n\nWarm sun filters through the summer canopy of big-leaf maples and Douglas firs. The air feels cool and then warm, and is fragrant with the delicious, almost imperceptible scent of blackberry blossoms. Ellis Cove Trail, the primary walking trail of Priest Point Park, meanders for 3 miles through woodland magic, passing creeks and ravines and then traversing bluffs above southern Puget Sound. Sword ferns, huckleberry, and salal weave a lush green carpet beneath towering western red cedars. This forest so well cocoons you in a sylvan spell that it's hard to believe urban Olympia lies just minutes away.\n\nThe wide, soft, wood-chip path is easy on the feet and quiet, as bicycles and horses are prohibited. The sculptured wooden trail signs are imaginative and playful. At one junction, a carved squirrel shows the way out, and elsewhere a sea otter perches on the trail post. Look for the unexpected sculpture of the small black bear climbing a trunk high above the trail.\n\nMore forest trails can be found in the northwest quadrant of the park, accessed from parking on Flora Vista Road, or by footbridge over Ellis Creek itself. Here you'll find paths leading to the pebbled beach of Budd Inlet, and more walking possibilities at mid- to low tide. Deep in the woods, the paths meander and turn, but there's no fear of getting lost, what with all the wooden animals to give directions. Sturdy wooden walkways lead you down into the cool ravine where Ellis Creek ends in a tidal estuary.\n\nInterpretive signs explain the life of the estuary and the native peoples who traveled to this point on Budd Inlet to trade. A French missionary lived here from 1848 to 1860. After he left, the virgin forest was reduced to stumps within 40 years. In 1905 the City of Olympia bought Priest Point Park and 75 years later created Ellis Cove Trail and the Woodsy Wonderland trails in the eastern portion of the park. This is one park to savor over and over again.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 2600 E Bay Drive NE, Olympia\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5 northbound, take exit 105 (City Center\/Port of Olympia); from southbound, take exit 105B. Follow signs for the Port of Olympia, staying right toward Plum Street. Follow Plum Street (which becomes E Bay Drive, then Boston Harbor Road NE) north for about 2 miles. The park entrance is on the right. To reach Ellis Cove Trail, enter the park and pass over Boston Harbor Road NE to get to another parking lot.\n\n**CONTACT:** Olympia Parks, Arts, and Recreation Department; (360) 753-8380; www.olympiawa.gov\/\u200bcity-services\/\u200bpark\n\n## **112 MCLANE CREEK NATURE TRAIL**\n\n**7 miles southwest of downtown Olympia**\n\n**_Boardwalk trails lead past beaver ponds, over wetlands, and through 150 acres of temperate rain forest alive with wildlife_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **2 wetland loops (0.6 miles and 1.1 miles), plus a 1-mile forest loop; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **Not allowed**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, viewing platforms, picnic shelter, demonstration forest, interpretive signs**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Trail sections, restrooms**\n\nEnter a temperate rain forest in healing, more than 75 years after loggers took out the giants. Huge stumps show the scars of springboards but now serve as nurse logs for new saplings. Beavers maintain their ponds, and black-tailed deer and coyotes roam the open grassland at dawn and dusk.\n\nStarting the loop either way leads you past active beaver ponds. These elusive but energetic rodents may not be easy to see, but you can observe the evidence of their work: freshly gnawed alders and cottonwoods lie tumbled along the water's edge. In winter the pond is full, almost overflowing, and alive with ducks, geese, herons, frogs, otters, muskrats, and salamanders. Sometimes fall floods wash the dam out and the pond drains, but within six months the beavers can rebuild and refill the pond.\n\nA cutoff trail, the Old Grade, makes a shorter loop or can be explored as a side trip from the main trail. This is a remnant of old logging days, when locomotives chugged through here on their way to the Mud Bay Timber Company on Puget Sound, just 5 miles away.\n\nOn the southern edge of the loop, you walk in a forest of western red cedar and Douglas fir. Moss and lichen adorn the massive limbs, and woodpeckers leave their markings where they have bored for insects. Sparkling-clear McLane Creek is home to spawning chum salmon. Interpretive signs along the trail help you envision the creek and surrounding habitat in all their seasonal changes.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 5042 Delphi Road SW, Olympia\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 104 (US 101 N\/Aberdeen). Go 4 miles and take the Mud Bay\/2nd Avenue exit. Turn left at the stop and go over the freeway. Take the first left onto McKenzie Road (which becomes Delphi Road). Go about 3 miles to the sign for McLane Creek Demonstration Forest and Nature Trail, and turn right to reach the trail parking. A Discover Pass is required for all vehicles.\n\n**CONTACT:** Washington State Department of Natural Resources, (360) 577-2025, www.wa.gov\/\u200bdnr\n\n**It's a Bird, It's a Plane...**\n\n**Well, most of us can tell the difference. But can you tell one bird from another? If you're a beginning birder, start by learning general shapes and sizes, and obvious color patterns. A bird's habitat is also a clue to its identity, whether you find it in a forest, meadow, wetland, or Puget Sound beach. The longer you study birds, the better you'll get at the specifics, such as telling one gull from another (they're tricky, though, with several years of plumage changes!) or one duck from another and moving past the LBJ (little brown job) category for all the smaller songbirds. Learn more by walking with more experienced birders, such as on National Audubon Society outings or ranger-led interpretive walks**.\n\n## **113 WATERSHED PARK (OLYMPIA)**\n\n**1 mile south of downtown Olympia**\n\n**_Immerse yourself in 153 acres of a moss-draped temperate rain forest cut by whispering Moxlie Creek, where salmon come to spawn_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **2.8 miles total; natural surface, boardwalk, wooden bridges**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Gentle to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only (no jogging)**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Olympia Woodland Trail (Walk #114) at the Eastside Street pedestrian trailhead**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Portable toilet at Henderson Boulevard parking lot**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Short section of gravel trail from 2829 Henderson Boulevard trailhead**\n\nFor nearly 100 years this temperate rain forest basin supplied the drinking water for all of Olympia. Saved from logging in the 1950s, Watershed Park now encircles you with a rich scent of wetland forest and the soothing sounds of birds and water. Bracken, horsetail, maples, and alder line G. Eldon Marshall Trail, which stretches from the rim to the streambed of Moxlie Creek and back. Trees tumbled by winter's windstorms lie like giant matchsticks, their roots exposed like pinwheels.\n\nFrom the Henderson Boulevard parking lot, descend into the forest, taking the loop in either direction. Steps lead down to marshes where, in summer, green algae create an impressionist painting on the water's surface. Sword ferns, bracken, and maidenhair ferns line the trail. In this deep, shady forest of Douglas fir, big-leaf maple, and alder, be ready for banana slugs and skunk cabbage, natural inhabitants of so wet and lush a place.\n\nThis is a popular walk, despite its ruggedness\u2014or perhaps because of it. Young families come with children in tow, teaching them the wonders of the streambed, where salmon spawn and tadpoles scoot about like tiny bumper cars gone crazy. Dogs are welcome, but only on leash, to protect the fragile habitat and sensitive replanting areas. Boardwalks, too, protect the wetlands and help you keep your feet dry; sturdy wooden bridges offer vantage points above the clear, sandy-bottomed creek. Good trail maintenance has kept this rain forest walkable even on wet winter days.\n\n**ADDRESS:** _Parking:_ 2500 Henderson Boulevard SE, Olympia; _Pedestrian:_ 2829 Henderson Boulevard SE; 1605 Eastside Street SE; 1201 22nd Avenue SE\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5 northbound, take exit 105 (City Center\/Port of Olympia). Stay hard right, following Port of Olympia signs. At the end of the ramp, turn left (onto unmarked Henderson Boulevard) and go 0.25 miles to the trailhead on the left.\n\nFrom I-5 southbound, take exit 105B. Follow signs for the Port of Olympia, staying left for Henderson Boulevard. Go under the freeway, and shortly after the roundabout the trailhead parking will be on the left.\n\n**CONTACT:** Olympia Parks, Arts, and Recreation Department; (360) 753-8380; www.olympiawa.gov\/\u200bcity-services\/\u200bparks. To volunteer to help maintain or enhance this park, call the Park Stewardship Program at (360) 753-8365.\n\n## **114 OLYMPIA WOODLAND TRAIL**\n\n**1 mile south of downtown Olympia**\n\n**_A level, accessible trail follows an old railway line for miles through a forest of towering maples and firs_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **2.5 miles one way; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles; horses on parallel natural trail**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Olympia's Watershed Park (Walk #113), Chehalis Western Trail (Walk #107), Lacey Woodland Trail (extension to the east)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, benches, map signs, picnic area**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved trail, restrooms, picnic area**\n\nBirdsong rings brightly in this emerald thoroughfare of old Olympia forest. Huge maples, dressed in soft green moss-velvet, stand sentinel over the smoothly paved trail, and deep in a green cleft a stream rushes through a canopy of ferns. Just over 0.5 miles from the trailhead, near the Frederick Street trailhead (pedestrian only), a spur trail leads to a waterfall along East Indian Creek. Other small natural-surface nature trails have been built by volunteers and lead into the creek canyon or onto the surrounding ridges. Although never far from the interstate highway, the traffic blurs to white noise, and, surprisingly, the sound of birdcalls and the rushing stream can be clearly heard.\n\nOver 25 years ago, this abandoned railway line began tempting Olympia's residents with the dream of creating an accessible trail from Olympia to Lacey and beyond. The trail opened in 2007 and now extends almost 5 miles from the State Capitol. Hundreds of volunteers of all ages have planted over fifteen thousand shrubs and saplings to help restore native flora. The idea of \"green\" is a theme with the trail: the parking lot is porous pavement, the restrooms are lighted with solar tubes, and the entire roof of the restroom and picnic shelter at the Eastside Street trailhead is covered in plants.\n\nThe entire trail runs from Watershed Park in Olympia to central Lacey, for a total of 4.75 miles. Although the eastern trailhead is in Lacey's Woodland Creek Community Park, with a pond and meadow trails, the 2.3 miles of interim trail traverse the business district and shops. For bicycling, the whole trail is a dream, but walkers seeking a natural venue should stick to the 2.5 miles between Olympia's Eastside Street and the Chehalis Western Trail, or take short strolls at the Lacey end near Woodland Creek Community Park.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 1600 Eastside Street SE, Olympia. Pedestrian trailheads at Frederick Street and Dayton Avenue.\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5, take exit 105 (Port of Olympia); from I-5 southbound, take exit 105B (Port of Olympia). Go straight through the light onto Plum Street. Go 0.1 miles and turn right onto Union Avenue SE. Go 0.2 miles and turn right onto Eastside Street SE. Cross the bridge and look on the left for the parking lot and a low building with plants on its roof.\n\n**CONTACT:** Olympia Parks, Arts, and Recreation Department; (360) 753-8380; www.olympiawa.gov\/\u200bcity-services\/\u200bparks. To volunteer, contact the Woodland Trail Greenway Association: www.wtga.org.\n\n## **115 TUMWATER HISTORICAL PARK AND CAPITOL LAKE INTERPRETIVE TRAIL**\n\n**Tumwater, 2 miles south of downtown Olympia, to Olympia**\n\n**_Wander 35 acres along the Deschutes River to Capitol Lake wetlands and an interpretive trail_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1.5 miles; natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Capitol Lake; Tumwater Falls Park (Walk #116) via sidewalk**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, playground, picnic shelter, interpretive trail, fishing docks, viewpoints**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved trail, restrooms**\n\nNestled in a pocket of marsh and greenery beneath the ramparts of I-5, tiny Tumwater Historical Park may not be a long-distance destination in itself unless you're a Washington State history buff. Numerous interpretive signs tell of life along the river, the old Olympia Brewery, and the early settlers. After strolling the garden-like setting of wild roses and marsh walks to the edge of the river, you can head north under the freeway to the shores of Capitol Lake, where a dock provides viewing access to the lake and a chance to get closer to the ducks and geese or to spot birds in the reeds that adorn its edges.\n\nIn this wild corner of Capitol Lake (created in the late 1970s when the lake was dredged) you may hear the blackbirds whistle _tse-er, tse-er_ or spot a great blue heron studying the water for lunch. The trail splits here, with the paved portion following the lake toward the Capitol Lake Interpretive Center and another viewing and fishing dock. Dozens of botanical markers dot both sides of the trail for those interested in what grows along the lakeshore.\n\nIf you stay left and follow the fence line on a natural surface path, you can loop around a wetland, pass near road parking on Deschutes Way, and circle back to the paved lake trail. Despite its proximity to the freeway, this stretch of trail is surprisingly quiet except for the undulating song of robins and the chirps of wrens.\n\nThe lake was first proposed in 1911 as a means of trapping sediment from the Deschutes River, but was not created until 1951. Today this lake is home to migrating and resident flocks of, among others, western grebes, red-winged blackbirds, juncos, pied-billed grebes, scaups, ruddy ducks, and swallows. In recent years New Zealand land snails have colonized the water, and due to their invasive nature, the lake is closed for swimming and boating.\n\n**ADDRESS:** _Tumwater Historical Park:_ 802 Deschutes Way SW, Tumwater; _Capitol Lake Interpretive Trail:_ 300 Deschutes Parkway SW, Olympia\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5 northbound, take exit 103 (Deschutes Way). Continue straight from the ramp through one stop sign, then turn right on Grant Road, which leads into the park.\n\nFrom I-5 southbound, take exit 103 (2nd Avenue). At the light, turn left on Custer Way to cross the freeway. Immediately after the overpass, take a sharp right, curving down to Deschutes Way. Turn right, then right again onto Grant Road into the park. Parking is available along Deschutes Way to access the interpretive trail.\n\n**CONTACT:** Tumwater Parks and Recreation Department, (360) 754-4160, www.ci.tumwater.wa.us\/\u200bdepartments\/\u200bparks-recreation. Washington State Department of Enterprise Services maintains the interpretive trail; call them at (360) 902-8881 or visit www.des.wa.gov.\n\n## **116 TUMWATER FALLS PARK**\n\n**2.5 miles south of downtown Olympia**\n\n**_The whoosh of cascading falls promises a sense of wilderness on this short jaunt into 15 acres of historical Washington_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **Less than 1 mile; paved, natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to steep**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Tumwater Historical Park (Walk #115) via 1 block of sidewalk**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic area, playground, viewing platforms, interpretive signs, salmon ladders, guided tours, native garden, historical site**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Salmon ponds, interpretive kiosk, restrooms**\n\nWalk the banks of the wild and tumbling Deschutes River as it makes the final leaps toward Puget Sound in three pounding cascades. A loop trail of paved pathways leads from the upper falls to the lower falls, and historical replicas of bridges span the river. So wonderfully noisy is this river that it blocks all sound of the nearby freeways and leaves you with a sense of having stepped out of the urban world into the mountains.\n\nThis small park is not only a great place for a short walk but it is full of information about the historical setting. It was here that Leopold Schmidt started the Olympia Brewery (visible across the river), and there were mills and logging ventures as well. In spring and summer the native-plants garden flourishes, and the maples create patterns of light and shadow over the well-maintained trails and footbridges. In winter the paths are kept clear and dry, and the rain-swollen river rages beside you.\n\nIn autumn, though, the park portrays its best character, with a colorful palette of fall leaves on the deciduous trees and the excitement of seeing the salmon run as the fish make their way up the ladders flanking the falls. A Washington Department of Fish and Wildlife facility is located on the grounds, and here you can learn about the spawning of the salmon and how the fish eggs and milt are harvested to be placed in hatcheries throughout the state.\n\nOwned privately by the Olympia Tumwater Foundation, the park is free and open to the public daily. Side paths parallel the river on the old railroad grades, allowing for more exploration. Tumwater Falls Park is located immediately upriver from Tumwater Historical Park, and the two parks beg to be united. Until then, you can walk the 800 feet of sidewalk between the two, or drive for 1 minute and continue your walk and tour of historical Tumwater.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 110 Deschutes Way SW, Tumwater\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5 southbound, take exit 103 (2nd Avenue) and follow 2nd Avenue to Custer Way, which will cross the freeway and river by the old Olympia Brewery. Turn right immediately onto Boston Street SW, then left onto Deschutes Way SW. In 0.2 miles turn left onto C Street SW into the park.\n\nFrom I-5 northbound, take exit 103 (Deschutes Way). Continue north on Deschutes Way for 0.3 miles. Turn right onto C Street SW into the park.\n\n**CONTACT:** Olympia Tumwater Foundation, (360) 943-2550, www.olytumfoundation.org. Donations to the park, which is a 501(c)(3) charity, may be tax deductible.\n\n## **117 PIONEER PARK**\n\n**Tumwater, 4 miles south of downtown Olympia**\n\n**_Stroll meadows and grasslands along the banks of the Deschutes River in this 85-acre community park_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **1.5 miles total; gravel, natural surface, paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, picnic areas, playground, playing fields**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved trail, restrooms**\n\nThis spacious community park with a rural feel and open meadows lies only minutes south of downtown Olympia. Here you can walk well-defined trails through open grassland or explore the banks of the Deschutes River. A trail system completed in 1996 has enlarged the park, and now it appeals not only to playground users and ball players but also to walkers, joggers, and birders.\n\nNestled in a curve of the Deschutes River, the meadow hosts rabbits and shrews, food for the hunting hawks overhead. From the parking lot, turn south from the playing fields and cross the natural meadow. The row of cottonwoods and alders defines the riverbank, where you can wander the sandy edge or picnic on the graveled bar. No swimming is allowed, but you can stop and throw a fishing line. Free-to-borrow life jackets are available to allow parents some peace of mind as their children play on the riverbanks in summer. Back in the meadow, take a different loop to return to the cars. If it's a clear day, look for the white crown of Mount Rainier to the east. Winter rains swell the river to dangerous levels, so it's not a time for exploring too close to the banks.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 5801 Henderson Boulevard SE, Tumwater\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5 northbound, take exit 101 (Tumwater Boulevard). Turn east and follow Tumwater Boulevard to its end (about 1 mile). Turn left on Henderson Boulevard and go about 0.6 miles. The park is on the left just past the Deschutes River.\n\nFrom I-5 southbound, take exit 103 (2nd Avenue). At the flashing light, turn left on Custer Way, which crosses the freeway. Continue on Custer Way through one light, then turn right at Cleveland Avenue. Go 1.2 miles and turn right on Henderson Boulevard. Go 0.5 miles, across Yelm Highway and the railroad tracks. The park is on the right at the bottom of the hill.\n\n**CONTACT:** Tumwater Parks and Recreation Department, (360) 754-4160, www.ci.tumwater.wa.us\/\u200bdepartments\/\u200bparks-recreation\n\n## **118 MIMA MOUNDS NATURAL AREA PRESERVE**\n\n**10 miles south of downtown Olympia**\n\n**_Stretch your legs and your imagination in 625 acres of grassland where the earth mounds into a bubbled landscape_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **3 miles; paved and natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Pedestrians only**  \n**DOGS** | **Not allowed**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Picnic tables, restrooms, viewing platforms, interpretive signs**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved 0.5-mile loop trail, interpretive kiosk, restrooms**\n\nLeave your car in the embrace of the forest, and step into a rare and magical land of undulating prairie grasses and ground cover. In spring and summer the prairie glows with blue and yellow flowers, and butterflies flit between the blossoms. In fall and winter the grasses give way to low orange and brown ground cover, and clumps of frothy white reindeer lichen brighten the undulating mounds. Year-round, raptors circle overhead searching for voles and mice, and on clear days Mount Saint Helens rises above the forest to the southeast.\n\nUnique in heavily forested western Washington, this natural grassland hides a geological mystery: How were these hundreds of acres of rolling mounds formed? Naturalists and scientists have long been pondering the origins of these mounds of glacial rocks and loam, and since 1841 more than thirty theories have been proposed, from burial grounds to gophers. Today, scientists generally agree that the mounds were formed after the last glaciers retreated 16,000 years ago and that they may have been the result of meltwater or earthquakes.\n\nThis unique prairie has long been known by the Native Americans who came here to find herbs and camas root, important plants used for healing and food. They maintained the health of the prairie by burning each year to keep the encroaching forest at bay. This practice also provided an open hunting ground and made traveling easier. Today, the DNR also does controlled burns to reduce the invasion of the forest and nonnative plants.\n\nIf you choose the long southern loop trail, you can see remnants of the stumps removed by the DNR. In fall and winter patches of controlled burns may be unsightly, but it is in these areas that the spring flowers flourish each year.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 12470 Waddell Creek Road SW, Olympia\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5 northbound, take exit 95 and stay left to merge onto Maytown Road SW. Go toward Littlerock, where the road jogs slightly and becomes 128th Avenue SW. Continue west to the T-junction with Waddell Creek Road and Mima Road SW. Turn right onto Waddell Creek Road SW. The park is on the left in about 0.7 miles. A Discover Pass is required for parking.\n\n**CONTACT:** Washington State Department of Natural Resources, (360) 577-2025, www.dnr.wa.gov\n\n## **119 MILLERSYLVANIA STATE PARK**\n\n**10 miles south of downtown Olympia**\n\n**_Walk through miles of old-growth forest and over lakeside wetlands in this 843-acre park_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **8.6 miles; boardwalk, natural surface**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **None**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms, playground, picnic areas, beaches, campgrounds, fitness trail, nonmotorized-boat rentals**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Restrooms, campgrounds, paved trails**\n\nStroll under immense old Douglas fir and western red cedar trees on miles of soft, needle-lined trails. Cross a wetland on a puncheon boardwalk. Enjoy the quiet of this state park forest in a section far from the bustle of the beaches (the park has 3,300 feet of lakefront). Here you may see pileated woodpeckers or their dainty cousins, the downy woodpeckers. Even if the birds elude you, you'll see evidence of work in the large holes pecked into snags throughout the forest.\n\nFor those with a mind for exercise besides walking, follow the blue-and-white arrows to the 1-mile fitness trail. Millersylvania's trail uses natural stumps for steps and logs for balance, an interesting (but possibly slippery) version of the normal exercise equipment found on other fitness trails.\n\nThose arriving early or staying in the campgrounds might find scat or tracks of martens, raccoons, or coyotes. Around the borders of Deep Lake you may see evidence of muskrats or otters. Birdlife is prolific. On and over the lake, look for ducks, geese, ospreys, and eagles. In summer, hummingbirds frequent bushes by the orchard and lakeshore.\n\nThe land was homesteaded in 1855, and remnants of the narrow-gauge railroad and skid roads can still be found. In 1921 the Miller family, who had dubbed it Millersylvania, donated the land to the state, stipulating it was to be held forever as a park. The park's structures were built almost entirely by hand in 1935 by the Civilian Conservation Corps. There is a separate parking lot for walkers on Tilley Road, in an old orchard north of the main entrance.\n\n**ADDRESS:** 12245 Tilley Road S, Olympia\n\n**GETTING THERE:** From I-5 southbound, take exit 99 (93rd Avenue S\/WA 121 S). Turn left on 93rd Avenue S\/WA 121 S. Drive 1.5 miles and turn right on Tilley Road S\/WA 121 S. The park entrance is on the right in 2.9 miles. A Discover Pass is required for parking.\n\n**CONTACT:** Washington State Parks, (360) 753-1519, www.parks.wa.gov\n\n**Anyone Home in the Alder Cone?**\n\n**Alder cones may be tiny, but they harbor tasty food. Chickadees fly from cone to cone listening for a meal. If they tap and hear a hollow sound, it means there's a tasty bug burrowed in the cone. Oh yum!**\n\n## **120 YELM TO TENINO TRAIL**\n\n**Tenino, 13 miles south of downtown Olympia, to Yelm, 20 miles southeast of downtown Olympia**\n\n**_Walk past historic towns, farmland, forest, the Deschutes River, and McIntosh Lake on this rural rails-to-trails pathway_**.\n\n**TRAIL** | **14 miles one way; paved**  \n---|---  \n**STEEPNESS** | **Level to gentle**  \n**OTHER USES** | **Bicycles; horses on parallel trail**  \n**DOGS** | **On leash**  \n**CONNECTING TRAILS** | **Chehalis Western Trail (Walk #107)**  \n**PARK AMENITIES** | **Restrooms at all trailheads, picnic tables at Yelm trailhead, historic interpretive signs**  \n**DISABLED ACCESS** | **Paved trail**\n\nWalk through historic Yelm, and then into the countryside with great views of Mount Rainier. One of the newest rails-to-trails conversions in Western Washington, this bicyclers' paradise (and walkers' long-distance challenge) connects the rural towns of Yelm, Rainier, and Tenino along the route followed for more than 100 years by the Burlington Northern Railroad. Although the trail parallels WA 507 fairly closely, it is pleasantly quiet. You pass orchards, farms, and backyards.\n\nNow fully paved, the trail from Yelm goes southwest through the town of Rainier's Wilkowski Park. Restrooms and a trailhead can be found here. West from Rainier, you cross the Deschutes River near the Chehalis Western Trail (Walk #107), then skirt the borders of Lake McIntosh for 0.75 miles, with some good birding. The trail passes under historic trestles and traverses tranquil sections of Douglas fir forest and agricultural land. The trail ends at Tenino City Park, which has parking and restrooms. Parts of the trail cross driveways and small roads, so keep kids and pets close.\n\n**ADDRESS:** _Tenino trailhead:_ Washington Avenue, Tenino; _Yelm trailhead:_ 105 W Yelm Avenue, Yelm\n\n**GETTING THERE:** _Tenino trailhead:_ From I-5, take exit 101 (Tumwater Boulevard). Stay on Tumwater Boulevard through the traffic circle. Turn right onto Capitol Boulevard SE\/Old Highway 99 SE. Go about 9.8 miles. In Tenino, turn left onto Sussex Avenue, then right onto S Frost Street. Follow S Frost as it becomes O'Brien, then turns sharply left to become Washington Avenue. The trailhead is in the park.\n\n_Yelm trailhead:_ From I-5 north- or southbound, take exit 111 (Marvin Way\/WA 510). Go 13 miles southeast on WA 510 into Yelm. Before the first stoplight in Yelm, turn right into the city hall parking lot on W Yelm Avenue.\n\n**CONTACT:** Thurston County Parks and Recreation Department, (360) 786-5595, www.co.thurston.wa.us\/\u200bparks\n\n# **ACKNOWLEDGMENTS**\n\nThis fourth edition marks the twentieth anniversary of _Take a Walk: Seattle_ , and for that, I want to thank all my readers, who have kept the book alive. Many friends and family members have helped with my research by walking dozens of miles with me, and their help and friendship are greatly appreciated. For this edition, special thanks go to Chip Muller, Angela Ginorio, Clare Meeker, Dan Grausz, Jules and Erik Still, and Amanda Hacking for providing a bed and office space while I did the research. Also, a big thanks to Gary Luke, Em Gale, and all the staff at Sasquatch Books for their help in creating a great fourth edition.\n\n# **ABOUT THE AUTHOR**\n\nBorn to a family of incurable travelers, Sue Muller Hacking has dusted her boots on the trails of Asia, Africa, South America, the United States, and Canada. An award-winning photojournalist and freelance writer, she is a resident of Seattle when not sailing around the world or trekking in Nepal with her husband and (now-adult) children.\n\n## Contents\n\n  1. Cover\n  2. Title Page\n  3. Copyright\n  4. Dedication\n  5. Contents\n  6. Walks at a Glance\n  7. Introduction\n  8. A Guide to This Book\n  9. Everett\n  10. Seattle\n  11. Eastside: Bellevue, Redmond, and Issaquah\n  12. South King County: Renton, Kent, and Des Moines\n  13. Tacoma\n  14. Olympia\n  15. Acknowledgments\n  16. About the Author\n\n  1. vi\n  2. vii\n  3. viii\n  4. ix\n  5. x\n  6. xi\n  7. xii\n  8. xiii\n  9. xiv\n  10. xv\n  11. xvi\n  12. xvii\n  13. xviii\n  14. xix\n  15. xx\n  16. xxi\n  17. xxii\n  18. xxiii\n  19. xxiv\n  20. xxv\n  21. xxvi\n  22. xxvii\n  23. xxviii\n  24. xxix\n  25. xxx\n  26. \n  27. \n  28. \n  29. \n  30. \n  31. \n  32. \n  33. \n  34. \n  35. \n  36. \n  37. \n  38. \n  39. \n  40. \n  41. \n  42. \n  43. \n  44. \n  45. \n  46. \n  47. \n  48. \n  49. \n  50. \n  51. \n  52. \n  53. \n  54. \n  55. \n  56. \n  57. \n  58. \n  59. \n  60. \n  61. \n  62. \n  63. \n  64. \n  65. \n  66. \n  67. \n  68. \n  69. \n  70. \n  71. \n  72. \n  73. \n  74. \n  75. \n  76. \n  77. \n  78. \n  79. \n  80. \n  81. \n  82. \n  83. \n  84. \n  85. \n  86. \n  87. \n  88. \n  89. \n  90. \n  91. \n  92. \n  93. \n  94. \n  95. \n  96. \n  97. \n  98. \n  99. \n  100. \n  101. \n  102. \n  103. \n  104. \n  105. \n  106. \n  107. \n  108. \n  109. \n  110. \n  111. \n  112. \n  113. \n  114. \n  115. \n  116. \n  117. \n  118. \n  119. \n  120. \n  121. \n  122. \n  123. \n  124. \n  125. \n  126. \n  127. \n  128. \n  129. \n  130. \n  131. \n  132. \n  133. \n  134. \n  135. \n  136. \n  137. \n  138. \n  139. \n  140. \n  141. \n  142. \n  143. \n  144. \n  145. \n  146. \n  147. \n  148. \n  149. \n  150. \n  151. \n  152. \n  153. \n  154. \n  155. \n  156. \n  157. \n  158. \n  159. \n  160. \n  161. \n  162. \n  163. \n  164. \n  165. \n  166. \n  167. \n  168. \n  169. \n  170. \n  171. \n  172. \n  173. \n  174. \n  175. \n  176. \n  177. \n  178. \n  179. \n  180. \n  181. \n  182. \n  183. \n  184. \n  185. \n  186. \n  187. \n  188. \n  189. \n  190. \n  191. \n  192. \n  193. \n  194. \n  195. \n  196. \n  197. \n  198. \n  199. \n  200. \n  201. \n  202. \n  203. \n  204. \n  205. \n  206. \n  207. \n  208. \n  209. \n  210. \n  211. \n  212. \n  213. \n  214. \n  215. \n  216. \n  217. \n  218. \n  219. \n  220. \n  221. \n  222. \n  223. \n  224. \n  225. \n  226. \n  227. \n  228. \n  229. \n  230. \n  231. \n  232. \n  233. \n  234. \n  235. \n  236. \n  237. \n  238. \n  239. \n  240. \n  241. \n  242. \n  243. \n  244. \n  245. \n  246. \n  247. \n  248. \n  249. \n  250. \n  251. \n  252. \n  253. \n  254. \n  255. \n  256. \n  257. \n  258. \n  259. \n  260. \n  261. \n  262. \n  263. \n  264. \n  265. \n  266. \n  267. \n  268. \n  269. \n  270. \n  271. \n  272. \n  273. \n  274. \n  275. \n  276. \n  277. \n  278. \n  279.\n\n  1. Cover\n  2. Cover\n  3. Title Page\n  4. Table of Contents\n  5. Start\n\n","meta":{"redpajama_set_name":"RedPajamaBook"}}